>The antagonists du jour are warrior-women
Couldn't the party bard alone put them out of commission for 9 months?
>>44077550
The party doesn't have a bard!
>nah, don't make a bard, make a useful character, they said
>>44077550
>Couldn't the party bard alone put them out of commission for 9 months?
Casting Impregnation is a touch attack.
>>44077550
Assuming you could overpower or seduce
Them you could otherwise you aren't fucked
Why is someone just apamming really shitty threads today while using Berserk pictures.
What the fuck is wrong with you.
>>44077550
Do you want him to die by snu-snu?
>>44077550
I guess abortion would make that plan useless. That or if they're actuallytraps.
>>44077550
>implying the warrior women aren't more interested in the healer chick
>>44079618
>Implying the healer "chick" isn't a shota trap
>>44080310
>implying it's not a reverse trap pretending to be a trap
>>44077550
Pregnancy doesn't show at all (save for absence of period) until the end of the first trimester and doesn't become any real hinderance until near end of the second.
>>44077550
>implying warrior women wouldn't have knowledge of herbal or magical Plan B
>>44077550
It seems plausible that they might be too busy at the moment with the whole killing-you thing to take the time to listen to the bard's pickup lines, however masterful.
>>44080441
>magic
Why not just give them magic that lets them transfer to a surrogate mother after conception?
Du jour?
![1981902_754743557939427_6066363747022400234_n[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/jV7cM1c.jpg "1981902_754743557939427_6066363747022400234_n[1].jpg")
>>44080506
>He doesn't speak French
>>44080535
>>44077550
He can try.
>>44080373
>implying that's not my fetish
I mean THEIR fetish.
>>44077550
>Couldn't the party bard alone put them out of commission for 9 months?
Wouldn't it be easier to... You know... Kill them?
I mean, just because they have a vagina doesn't mean you have to try and get inside it.
>>44080698
>just because they have a vagina doesn't mean you have to try and get inside it.
Yes it does. And don't even get us started on halflings using Escape Artist.
>>44077550
Is your bard pic related? Then yes, with lasting damage to their hearing. If he isn't? Fuck no, not while I'm GMing.
>>44080764
>Yes it does.
You must be a blast with any female PCs or female players.
>>44080800
>taking everything seriously
You are the cancer that kills /tg/
>>44080800
he's leadin ya on, buddy. fuckin with ya. bamboozlin ya.
>>44077550
You know that babies take a while to grow to the point where they begin to encumber the pregnant woman.
>the antagonists kidnap your bard and lock him up in a customized snu snu tower
What now?
>>44080816
We've covered this base.
>>44080844
>doesn't cover the fact that all murderhobos and other kinds of protagonists are physically incapable of becoming pregnant unless the plot demands it
sloppy
>>44080837
We'd end up with the "Lancelot saves Galahad" bit from Monty Python.
>>44077550
You try it and post pics
>>44080698
>Wouldn't it be easier to... You know... Kill them?
If the Bard has high enough charisma to convince them to fall on their swords, yes. Otherwise it's easier to get them voluntarily pregnant.
>>44080800
>Playing with women
That's your mistake right there.
>>44080837
>snu snu tower
...go on.
>>44080800
Not all female players are repressed, puritannical feminists.
>>44077605
>Play a human bard actress, acting like a mix between a scammer and a prima donna. The explanation I give is Miguel and Tulio meets Rarity
>Only one with appraisal, so I routinely scalp extra profit off of the rest of the group, buying myself lovely things like fur coats, and a caravan
>One day the group cottons on with my excessive bonus scheme, and give me a chance to own up. I deny it, saying I have a large inheritance.
>Group turns up at a Jarl's house in the Fjords, and we need his boat to reach an island up river where a necromancer lurks
>Jarl offers to swap the boat for the bard's hand in marriage. Smitten, but uninterested in burly northern men, the dainty flower declines.
>Fighter says I should marry him, and then they'll sneak me out at night
>Epic feast and wedding follow
>Group promises to rescue me if I drug him asleep
>I do
>1 night passes... 2 nights pass... 3 nights pass
>They never show
Another game series came across the town 5 years later. She's a scornful woman with 3 children, who bores the town with tales of her "great acting career"
>Jarl says she makes up for it in bed
>>44079540
>That or if they're actually traps.
>implying
>>44081074
Your party sounds like assholes. Also, why didn't you just leave the first night, you idiot?
>>44081074
>Miguel and Tulio meets Rarity
>Rarity
>>44081490
>take the pone out of the picture and visualize character
>would make a perfect bard if you get skill focus :profession seemstress
>>44081466
Party sounds like people with the right idea.
Nigga wants to fuck the party over, nigga gunna get fucked over.
>>44081641
>making monye out of a skill is fucking the party
>being this much of a fucking vindictive cunt
yea, stay mad angry fag
>>44081702
I think he's talking about...
>>44081074
>Only one with appraisal, so I routinely scalp extra profit off of the rest of the group, buying myself lovely things like fur coats, and a caravan
