Meanwhile, on Jedi Council /tg/.
>>43825631
Does my head really look like a wang?
>>43825631
Are the Sith 'that guys'?
>>43825730
Duh, thats why we call you dickhead
>>43825730
nah looks like a cancerous testicle
>>43825631
Are... are we the actual bad guys?
>>43825812
Yes, Jedis are space ISIS
>>43825730
We keep telling you to wear a wizard hat. It'd make you look less like a dickhead.
Can't do anything about your lack of ears, though.
>>43825812
No, just self-righteous and complacent.
>>43825782
I thought it was because my name was Richard! What the fuck guys?
>>43825812
>Can take Force sensitives kids by force and nobody can do shit
Yes, they're
>>43825631
Okay, so this has been a thing for a while but I have a question: Why, exactly, did we forbid the sexytimes?
I think we might be hamstringing ourselves with that ban. All the sith need to do to make jedi fall these days is flash some tits or dress in tight leather.
>>43825870
fuck orphans
>>43825930
Because suffering is caused by desire, and if you break it down, suffering leads to hate, hate leads to anger, anger leads to fear.
So they fear relationships because it can only end in suffering. Like if two jedi want the same girl and only one succeeds you know which one is going to fall.
>>43825930
We forbade all things that might lead to attachment. That's why we all wear these bathrobes and our personal quarters are plain as hell.
>>43825870
>Can take Force sensitives kids by force and nobody can do shit
There was a very interesting article on HoloNet about that very situation. Some Jedis found an "orphan" after some big city-wide disaster and started training him, then months later his parents were found alive. They demanded their kid back, but the Jedi said it would be too dangerous now that the kid had already started training.
>>43826014
Okay, so what if we just encouraged casual sex and sleeping around instead of single partner sex?
>>43826042
We should totally just kill that kid. Definitely. It's the only right thing to do.
>>43826042
I meant more in the
>That kid is a Force sensitive, give him to me
>No, is our kid and we love him
>Would you like to talk to my lightsaber about that?
>Oooh, space police help me!
>Sorry, mam, give the kid to the jedi
>>43826047
Same thing. Their desire to be with them will cause suffering when they can't, and that brings out the dark side.
Basically, Humans cannot be jedi without falling eventually. That's sort of why IRL is how it is.
A real Jedi would never use a computer to talk on a chinese cartoon board.
>>43826047
Because then we'd be too busy fucking instead of defending the universe.
Am I the only one who feels that we should have a dedicated military division? I know we're all about peace but we live in a galaxy with giant planetary corporate droid armies and the possibility of Sith resurgence.
The difference between Jedi Knight and Jedi Master or Monk isn't all the defined these days.
Windu, you'd be all about heading that up right?
>>43826091
Jokes aside that happened in the comics, I know, EU, and the Jedi had to kill both parents because they wouldn't let the kid go with him.
>>43825631
Chancellor Sheev seems like a nice guy.
>>43826091
Did you watch Episode I?
>>43826091
More like "Remember Tashi station, when the force sensitive was missed and he killed the whole town? That's why we have to take your son. He's a threat to everyone."
Star Wars would have no choice but to treat them exactly like Psykers in 40k. Can you imagine terrorism with the fucking force?
>>43826107
>Humans cannot be jedi without falling eventually
You mean any sapient creature, right?
>>43826113
>implying the Jedi do that anyway
Nothing of value would be lost.
>he uses a purple lightsaber and created a super special angry form of combat that only he can use without falling to the dark side
Why is master windu such a fucking special snowf- he's behind me isn't he?
>>43826150
Jar Jar Binks was the key to all of that
>>43826159
More than likely, yes. Nothing that evolves can stay away from the dark side, not without an absurd dedication to an ascetic life.
Which is why the Jedi should be based on Warrior Monks, not fucking samurai. Star Wars should never take place during a war.
>>43826124
>and the possibility of Sith resurgence
Don't be ridiculous. the sith have been gone for millennia. There Is No Way They Could Reemerge.
>>43826181
That's Master Dindu.
>>43826181
Yes he is. Also, EU.
>>43826202
Thanks, reddit.
>>43826213
The jedi use sith like americans use terrorism.
Convenient justification to further their ends.
You know who would be a great leader for the Republic?
>>43826223
>Yes he is. Also, EU.
Nope, that's in the complete visual dictionary.
>>43826202
>>43826226
Well, he created the Empire, didn't he? we can't deny that.
>>43826262
Get out of here Sheev, damn doesn't this place have any security?
>>43826264
Didn't know that was canon.
>>43825968
>fuck orphans
we all do, master O'Leary.
>>43826152
Unskilled mind tricks and moving cardboard boxes around? Are they so dangerous?
Even the so called Chosen One could barely hold down a racing career on a backwater planet until he was trained.
Also, during the days of the Empire, what happened to the potentially hundreds of children who were never picked up by the Council? Was there a police force to deal with it or did Vader have the uncomfortable job of stabbing toddlers for a couple of decades?
>>43826356
>>43826375
The seven forms are canon.
>>43826423
It's not like he minds stabbing toddlers.
>>43826423
Want the official explanation or the EU explanation?
Officially, nobody knows.
EU, Palpatine had a lot of non official apprentices and Emperor's hands, the other force users developed their powers all by themselves.
>>43826213
Oh definitely. I was using them as a shorthand for Dark Jedi.
The darker uses of the force.. could be independently rediscovered. In theory.
>>43826014
what about Farfalla? That guy's got mad quaters
>>43826588
>Farfalla
Vendetta?
>>43826423
>Also, during the days of the Empire, what happened to the potentially hundreds of children who were never picked up by the Council? Was there a police force to deal with it or did Vader have the uncomfortable job of stabbing toddlers for a couple of decades
The EU gave us the Imperial Inquisition that searched for them and gave the choice of service or death. It hasn't been addressed in new canon to my knowledge but I imagine they'll get around to it.
Daily reminder that the Force is neutral, it's up to the user if it's used for good or for evil.
>>43825631
Where are the children at other Masters of the Jedi? I would like to see them for training purposes.
>>43826638
>being a choicefag
Jesus I hate Social Jedi Warriors
>>43826638
Who let the potentium dude in here?
>>43826638
Daily reminder there's nothing wrong with being a Sith.
I find those who can weild lightsabers and hold it against a jedi without being force users are badasses.
Gif related
>>43827849
...okay.
You going anywhere with that or what?
So why haven't we banned Gungans yet? Pretty sure just talking to a Gungan has led more Jedi on the path towards hatred than any amount of love has.
>>43827849
It's literally just a matter of good technique.
>>43828046
Don't be racist, fellow master.
They only have one retard, and even they tried to kill him before, well, that idiot Qui Gon had to fuck up like always. I find that they are quite pleasant company if you have noise-cancelling headphones.
Their tech is pretty neat too.
So I was sparring with this Knight the other day, and I used a Trà kata technique on him. He then immediately stormed out of the room, insisting that he didn't have to fight against "pure cheese", as he called it.
I mean really? A lightsaber's only good for three things: turning it on, swinging it around, and turning it off. Who cares what order I do those things in?
>>43828359
If he had any Niman base whatsoever, he wouldn't be so out of his goddamn depth.
>>43827849
Why didn't he win even though he had the high ground?
I hate 3eaboos they're coarse and rough and irritating and they get everywhere.
![stupid-best[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/VZWX2hs.jpg "stupid-best[1].jpg")
Wait, what are we doing here again?
We are knights... but we are not soldiers... but somehow we discuss strategy and battleplans and lead clone troopers into combat?
Speaking of clone troopers, how does producing clones that take ten years to mature help to fight a droid army that can be constructed in months? We'd need to know of their existence literally a decade ahead of time. Does the Force include timebending? Speaking of clones, why didn't we just clone someone with a high medichlorian count to create an army of superjedi? In fact, skip the cloning: why don't we just breed the micro-organisms known as medichlorians and inject them into the bloodstream of any promising Jedi candidate to enhance his force powers?
And why does some kid in the desert that confuses the first woman he sees that isn't covered in shit for an angel (does this mean there's Space Christians out there prior to the possible spread of Christianity from earth into the universe) need with a protocol droid anyway? How does he even program a protocol droid according to protocols he has no knowledge of? This literally makes less sense than a Japanese pre-teen writing an in-depth analysis of Masai customs.
And why is it lightsaber and not lightsabre? We're somehow knights who aren't politicians yet have political power, doesn't that make us British?
>>43829331
>We'd need to know of their existence literally a decade ahead of time
They asked for them a decade ago, the plot of Sifo Diaz and Darth Tyranus, during the naboo conflict, they just forgot they did or didn't care.
>>43829331
I thought the medichlorians were just attracted to beings that are powerful in the Force, rather than making them powerful.
>>43829331
1) We are not /rank and file/ soldiers. The distinction is important.
2) see >>43829436
3) It's been tried, it doesn't work out well.
4) Probably been tried, probably doesn't work out well.
5) Angels aren't unique to Christianity
6) IIRC he said he made it to help his mother with whatever slave work she did
7) He probably looted the programming from a scrapped droid
8) Because everyone knows that only the Imperials are British
>>43829204
Because [A Certain Point of View] is broken as shit.
>>43826126
Why wasn't nonlethal force used?
>>43825631
>Kaminoan Jedi Master on the Council
>"Where the hell is Kamino?"
Does the presence of the Dark Side also give the Jedi intense memory loss?
>>43829621
>all long-necked sentients must come from the same place
Wow rude
>>43826042
Which makes zerp sense since leaving the Jedi Order is largely fine since Anakin was thinking about doing it to be with Padme and Dooku straight up did it long before planning to turn full Suth Lord
>>43829648
There is a difference between letting someone go a mere few months into their training and years later when they've been trained enough to not accidentally fuck shit up.
>>43826218
Miraluka are interesting but wouldn't they be straight up fucked fighting a Sith Lord using the Dark Side to mess with their connection to the force? Or does that only apply to more advanced things like their foresight?
>>43826423
Actually yeah, a person who can not only hold their own in an extremely dangerous high speed racing sport where the drivers actively try to kill each other but win without cheating like everyone else when they were 8 years old sounds like someone very dangerous.
>>43829674
>Kid who knows how to levitate some small things at best
>Teenager who knows how levitate some big things and now own a laser sword that can slice through anything
Ehh.
You guys are all assholes. I go out and get the pizzas while you wax philosophic, and what do you know.
Apparently Calamari are people, and I did not know that.
Very funny guys.
>>43829818
>thinking purely in terms of raw ability
Once they are aware of what they can do, they're liable to try and see what /else/ they might be able to do. Would you trust a child to not do anything bad if left to their own devices?
A more fully trained padawan may have more control over their powers, but they'll also have been taught to use it responsibly.
Lately I've been innovating ways to stretch the force to its limits. I did a septuple flip yesterday from rest. Something tells me I'm not going far enough though. What do you guys think?
>>43825930
>forbid the sexytimes
No, you've got it wrong. We forbade attachments and relationships. Have you seen Aayla Secura's wardrobe? And do you honestly think Kit's real last name is "Fisto?" Seriously, man.
And then there's all the shit Ki-Adi Mundi gets up to. "Repopulating the species" my ass.
>>43829621
Yarael Poof is Quermian, not Kaminoan.
>>43830706
>EU shit
Nice fanfic you have there
>>43830724
>EU
He's in the fucking movies, you psychedelic retard.
>>43830724
people who shit on EU at every corner ( and are usually wrong like you are) are worse than EUshits who bring it up at every corner.
>>43825631
Why are you guys always staring at me every time I turn around?!
>>43829970
Maybe you should try spinning, it's a good trick.
>>43831234
No reason General, just that we all are happy to follow your lead. I'll stay at your back if ya need me, ma'am.
>>43831417
You...don't need to stand that close...
>>43831459
New protocol... To avoid Separatist infiltrators.
so what actually happens if one of us breaks "no love" rule?
I mean we can't just confiscate the lightsaber and tell them to get out of the Jedi Temple, they'll just make a new one and still have a lifetime's worth of Jedi training
>>43826107
But suffering can also lead too action knowing they have something worth fighting for behind them meaning they will have more then just a ideal that you can become disillusioned too
>>43831554
Bly, there's not enough room between you and my rear to even fit an ewok, much less a Separatist, also, put that gun away, it makes me nervous.
>>43831642
I suspect that taking the saber is more a symbolic gesture than an actual attempt at disarming them.
The exact details of what happens probably varies a lot by situation, a prissy little shit like Anakin who runs around in secret probably gets a much less favorable deal than someone that openly goes 'hey I love this person, deal with it'
Guys, my com is broken and I can only recive images, what's this "99" I keep receiving from the Chancellor's office?
>>43831717
That's what the Separatist would like
>>43829538
I invoke my force ability: [Now we're even] to negate your high ground advantage!
Your Move!
>>43831234
I'd Secure those boobs if you catchs my drift
>>43829689
Direct mental assault seems to work wonders against them. Also, is there a Force equivalent to a flash bang?
>>43831845
>>43829538
that thread was amazing
![rick-moranis-as-dark-helmet-in-spaceballs[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/pTlKVWH.jpg "rick-moranis-as-dark-helmet-in-spaceballs[1].jpg")
>Daily reminder that evil will always triumph because good is DUMB!
>>43831845
Your mom is even, Anakin.
>>43831835
Seriously...stop it. I'm not into Mandolorians grown in a vat.
Why do the Sith keep attacking us? We have the moral highground.
>>43829184
This isn't a matter of knowing Ninam. I had him spar with one of the younglings and she beat him with Shiicho alone. He just can't wield lightsaber to save him life: he just wails with that thing and I'm afraid he'll slice himself up someda.
>>43832181
We haven't heard a whiff of the sith in literal centuries, what attacks are you talking about?
>>43826009
seems to me like you should promote liberal sexuality then. If two jedi like a girl who is to say both can't succeed?
>>43829970
Try building a ship in a bottle using only the force.
Once you are capable of doing that, start scaling it up. Hovercars, then star fighters, then freighters, etc
The stars are the limit.
>>43831642
Um...
Thats exactly what happens.
The younger ones get a slap on the wrist and told to end it or leave.
>>43825730
Only Master Dick-head over here gets to play hide the lightsaber with his ugly dickheaded women. Some made up bullshit about low birthrates on his planet.
Guys can I just wear some space jeans and a space t-shirt? I'm so sick of bounty hunters making fun of me. I haven't even been to many sand planets, seriously.
>>43832547
I tried that a few times but it keeps looking out like a shmorgblak.
