Stat me /tg/
1 HP
+20 to Frighten (Internet betas)
Flumph /10
in every stat
>>43574628
What the fuck am I looking at and how big is it?
>>43574675
>Sea spiders, also called Pantopoda or pycnogonids, ('pycno-' closely packed, 'gonid' gonidia) are marine arthropods of class Pycnogonida. They are cosmopolitan, found especially in the Mediterranean and Caribbean Seas, as well as the Arctic and Antarctic Oceans. There are over 1300 known species, ranging in size from 1 millimetre (0.039 in) to over 90 cm (35 in) in some deep water species. Most are toward the smaller end of this range in relatively shallow depths, however, they can grow to be quite large in Antarctic waters.
>>43574628
SM-2
ST6, DX 8, IQ 2, HT 12
Charisma -5
Appearance: monstrous.
>>43574697
>90 cm
That's just not right.
>>43574960
There are worse things down there..
>>43574992
>>43575218
HP: 1
AC: 8
Loot: none
Attacks: none
EXP: 10
>>43574992
Emrakul, is that you?
>>43574628
the ocean is horrifying
everything in there just gives me the heebiejeebies
I like aquariums, but I'll be damned if I go swimming.
I live next to the ocean, and I think a tsunami is my biggest fear.
I just hope that I get crushed by debris before being pulled down in that cold pit of hell.
>>43575312
I find it hilarious that we're likely to colonize mars before fully exploring the ocean
Assuming fantasy world, spider is actually approximately 10 feet tall at upper bend in leg.
HP: 90 or so.
No natural armour
Attacks: Has a back mounted artillery cannon.
One of many, many, MANY siege units in the Archanid Army.
>>43575312
How about space?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QgNDao7m41M
>2:36
>>43574628
Card Name: Strandwalker
Mana Cost: 5
Converted Mana Cost: 5
Types: Artifact — Equipment
Card Text:
Living weapon (When this Equipment enters the battlefield, put a 0/0 black Germ creature token onto the battlefield, then attach this to it.)
Equipped creature gets +2/+4 and has reach.
Equip 4
Watermark: Phyrexian
Expansion: Mirrodin Besieged
Rarity: Uncommon
Card Number: 137
Artist: Igor Kieryluk
>>43574628
This reminds me of something I once put in a dungeon..
Terrorweaver
Huge Aberration
HP: 200
AC: 15
Skills: +9 to stealth, +4 to Perception
Str 16, Dex 20, Con 14, Int 12, Wis 12, Cha 6
Multiattack 2: Impale +7, 2d8+5 piercing, Bite +7, 2d8+5 piercing, Con Save DC 13 or 4d8 Poison damage, half as much on a succesful save. Targets reduced to 0 hp by Terrorweaver's Bite Attack are Stabilized and Paralyzed until they regain health.
Special Attacks: Web +7, 40/80 ft range, Targets are Restrained. Strength Check DC 15 to break. Webs have 15 Hp and AC 8.
Special Maneuvers: Phase Shift, as a Bonus Action, Terrorweaver can teleport to the Ethereal Plane or back to Material Plane.
Terrorweaver attacks only isolated or weakened enemies, using its Web attack to restrain a single target before attacking its prey. It will always try to Paralyze and carry a target to its lair to devour it later.
Terrorweaver will always use its Plane Shift ability to escape when grievously injured. It never fights to the death, unless defending its young in its own lair.
Basically it's like Alien, but in D&D and a huge fucking spider.
>>43574992
What the holy shit fucking sweet baby Jesus am I fucking looking at?
Holy fuck my nightmares have found new fuel fuck you guy,
>>43575677
Really? That's not even that bad compared to a lot of deep sea shit.
>>43575677
It's not even an animal, it's a sunken ship.
>>43575677
Overgrown sunken ship at the Bikini Atoll, according to google. Nothing spooky here.
>>43575694
Most of the deep sea shit has the one virtue of either being too small to bother me or turning inside out at decent god fearing altitude.
That fucking thing is fucking huge and surface dwelling.
What the fuck is it?
I'd reverse google it but I'm fucking terrified of what answers I might get.
>>43575733
Oh gee. That's fine then.
An underwater hell wreck with a face and gaping maw that looks oddly alive in a sea next to an irradiated island.
Nothing ominous about this at all.
If I had to fight that thing or Godzilla I would go fisticuffs with the big lizard and consider myself lucky.
>>43575777
The "maw" is the hole for the anchor, apparently. It's basically just heavily corroded and encrusted in various sea critters. Honestly I don't think it's scary.
>>43574628
I roll to seduce
>>43575777
Yeah, I mean, it's not like it's a jellyfish the size of a house.
>>43575796
Anchor hawse hole, rather. For the USS Saratoga (the fifth of that name, a Lexington-class aircraft carrier), a rather large ship.
>>43575830
What the fuck is that
>>43575830
Gif please?
>>43575851
>a jellyfish the size of a house.
>>43575750
It's a bunch of sponges and algae that formed on a sunken ship from WW2 near the Baker test sites. Think of it this way, all the deep sea creatures we've found are from the Bathypelagic zone. Pic related is probably the most famous creature from the Bathypelagic zone..
Below that are the Abyssopelagic zone and the Hadopelagic zone (literally named after Hades), which we can quite literally count the number of discovered species with our fingers.
In these pelagic zones there is little to no nutrients and absolutely zero observable sunlight, it is a maw of darkness that is inhabited solely by predators, containing who knows how many creatures of undistinguished size, bred in the darkness to do no more than kill eat and reproduce. As a species we have discovered and recorded a single digit percentage of the ocean, god knows what else can exist down there.
>>43575830
That doesn't bother me. I understand jelly fish. They are like heavy metal flowers of the sea. So long as you leave them alone they leave you alone.
Its the other crap that's nightmare fodder.
>>43575877BLOOP
>>43575855
It's a fake, the species doesn't grow that large, although it's still a seven foot long jellyfish, it's not the size of a fucking house. A jellyfish that big would go through some brutal decompression phases as it got closer to the surface
>>43575877
Does Aquaman get to control the whole ocean or just a certain level?
>>43575876
Yeah but what type of Jellyfish.
>>43576110
Cyanea capillata
>>43576124
>Cyanea capillata
Thank you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lOq8O-x55Os
idk, looks pretty cute to me though
>>43576154
Ayy Lmao
Sea Spider (AC 7, HD 1, hp 1, MV 30' (10'), #AT 0)
>>43575830
I believe the picture is photoshopped. Thise jellyfish can get quite big (like, the bell is as wide as a person is tall), but not that big. Siphonophores (see the video), on the other hand can be hundreds of meters in size. They'd be the biggest animals in existance if they weren't actually made from millions of tiny animals.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KT1TSbarW1U
>>43575877
Yeah. The deep sea is freaky as hell. It's so utterly alien to us, and completely unlike any enviroment you'd find on land. There is no light and no source of nutrients save from the dead bimatter falling from above, or the creatures that migrate up to slightly lower depths to eat, so practically everything there has evolved into some sort of nightmarish hellbeast that all try to eat eachother.
Luckily for us, the difference in scale means said nightmaris hellbeasts are quite tiny and weak compared to humans (the lack of resources means they pretty much have to have weak muscles, slow metabolism and small size, since they need to be able to survive with very little food).
>>43574992
the resemblance is uncanny
>>43576316
Right, tiny and weak, like colossal squid. Oh wait, no, those are huge, terrifyingly powerful horrorbeasts from our collective nightmares.
>>43576316
>Underwater vore hell
That's the best descriptor of the deep ocean I've ever heard, thank you anon.
>>43576316
Alternatively there's the cases of gigantism and the idea that certain creatures within the lower depths have reached such masses as a coping mechanism and instead trap and float
and then there's this guy
>>43576356
It actually looks like a pretty normal fish in its native enviroment (pic related). It's just that its body is very gelatinous and has density similar to water, which lets it survive in high pressure. When lifted from the water its body can't maintain its shape without the water to support it, and it collapses into a blob.
>this thread
now i know why people don't want to explore the ocean and pick space instead
Honestly, the best way to get rid of animal rights activists is to just show them the deep ocean. I used to like nature, but I'd be ok with covering the entire planet in a parking lot if it meant getting rid of these horrors.
>>43575890
he Atlantic Portuguese man o' war (Physalia physalis), also known as the Man-of-war, bluebottle, or floating terror, is a marine cnidarian of the family Physaliidae. Its venomous tentacles can deliver a painful sting.
>tentacles that are typically 10 m (33 ft) in length, but can be up to 50 m (160 ft)
>>43576494
>>43576469
>not being intrigued and wanting to explore more
>he doesn't want to be the guy that awakens an ancient evil that ushers in a new era for the world
Your loss
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/False_vacuum
>The possibility that we are living in a false vacuum has never been a cheering one to contemplate. Vacuum decay is the ultimate ecological catastrophe; in the new vacuum there are new constants of nature; after vacuum decay, not only is life as we know it impossible, so is chemistry as we know it. However, one could always draw stoic comfort from the possibility that perhaps in the course of time the new vacuum would sustain, if not life as we know it, at least some structures capable of knowing joy. This possibility has now been eliminated.
>>43576469
The ocean is much more interesting than space, as well as far more relevant. Space is a big fucking nothing, any potential disaster from there is impossible to defend against, nothing we do can affect it, it's empty, and our ability to go there is about fucking non-existent. The ocean however is absolutely vital to our day-to-day lives, we're quite likely destroying it, it's right fucking there, and we have all the tech necessary to explore it.
>>43576616
>any potential disaster from there is impossible to defend against
That's what colonies are for.
>>43576597
That's a bit out of context, the idea is that if all of the assumptions involved within the test cases are correct.
>>43576616
>we have all the tech necessary to explore it
Unfortunately getting people to fund the explorations is another issue entirely.
Space is also a lot more romantic than some ROVs doing 1 km sweeps of the floor just to find a bunch of worms and sediment, thus easier to convince someone of funding.
>>43576469
Oh cool it's the lazer eye fish.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1772429/
>>43576653
Depends on how you see it. As I see it, colonies can't defend anyone, it'd just be a bunch of other people who wouldn't be affected, except emotionally. It's also by most accounts a scenario for the distant future, and one entrusted to the hands of people who can't be arsed to take care of the resources we already have. And if we need them, it'll likely be because we didn't pay any fucking attention to the oceans.
>>43576729
Just tell the Americans that China is making a deep sea exploration vessel to mine for seaforium.
>>43576824
Don't even have to go that far, just inform them of the vast untapped oil deposits that need to be liberated from the stinky brown fish
>>43576597
>on exploring the deep seas
Or we can just tell the current administration the seas are full of illegal Aquatoids
>>43576356
Go figure, a deep-sea jew.
>>43577041
Nah, they'd just build a wall over the ocean then
>>43575677
That's a boat, anon.
>>43576616
Well, on the long run, we either have to get off the planet or die trying. But untill we have the tehnology to colonise other planets (or at least the moon), studying the ocean will probably have more immediate use, as at least we can tehoretically go down there.
There are actually a vast amount of untapped resources down there, such as these lumps of manganese and other metals just laying around in their millions on the abyssal plains, but the dififculty of getting them to the surface or extracting them safely makes making use of them practically impossible.
>>43576597
AZATHOTH AWAKENS
>>43576653
Leaving someone behind can hardly be called defending yourself. All it defends is this vaguest of notions of species survival.
>>43577176
>the dififculty of getting them to the surface or extracting them safely makes making use of them practically impossible.
That's simply not true. Conventional supply of manganese, nickel etc. is sufficient to stall the development of more exotic methods, but nodule mining has been done with relative ease before. When the need arises, it will see a resurgence, including deep sea harvesting.
>>43577322
Yeah, it's been done succesfully since the 60s, I believe, but it's more expensive than conventional mining (for now), and then you have the enviromental concerns.
>>43576616
>Space is a big fucking nothing
Anon, please
>any potential disaster from there is impossible to defend against
Quitter talk
>nothing we do can affect it
Yet
Where's the owlbear statblock?
>>43577176
In the long run, we die no matter what because either the universe goes "pop" and ends, or it goes "meh" and reaches thermodynamic equilibrium in a few billion years. Either way, the universe is fucked.
>>43578873
>not having hope that humanity becomes as gods and reaches technological apotheosis
>thinking that bitch mother nature will have the final word
>>43578929
"Mother nature" is the planet. We're talking laws of physics here, not the dirtball we happened to evolve on. I mean, I'd like for humanity to spread out to the stars and all that crap, but ultimately, life is pretty much boned by thermodynamics.
>>43579045
>We're talking laws of physics here
My point still stands, Miss Fundamental Forces can do screw herself.
>but ultimately, life is pretty much boned by thermodynamics.
Sounds like quitter talk to me.
>>43579091
I know right, it's as if he doesn't want to achieve immortality and die as close to the heat death of the universe as possible.
>>43579627
>dying with the universe
>>43579627
>>43579045 and >>43578873 here. I'm all for dying as close to the heat death of the universe as possible. But I don't think we're going to be able to stop it or escape, as >>43578929 seems to think. Because that's silly.
>>43579627
Chilling around after the destrouction of humanity and having to wait millions of years until the next intelligent species evolves sounds pretty boring.
I would like to make some other people immortal too.
Do we really understand enough about the workings of the universe to make such a grand final statement that it will one day end?
Reality is far stranger than anything mankind could fathom, I feel. You have to wonder about the conditions that existed before the universe and before the before universe.
This is a universe that spawned intelligence from waves of energy.
>>43580466
Its a ''what comes up must come down'' idea.
>>43576063
Fuck that.
Aquaman doesn't WANT to controll that part.
>>43580466
The alternative (the universe existing forever, stretching forever and everything decaying forever and getting away from everything else, resulting in literally forever alone particles) is boring.
An immortal witnessing this will go insane.
>>43580339
>Because that's silly.
Lots of things were silly; making a flying machine, going to the moon, connecting the entire civilized world with a nearly instantaneous and general purpose telecommunications network. I like to live by the assumption that there are no limits, only obstacles. The laws of physics may be very big obstacles, and nearly impossible to surmount, but obstacles nonetheless.
>>43580453
>not making your own intelligent species
>>43580636
>An immortal witnessing this will go insane.
Why so? I often hear this touted as a downside of immortality, but I'm not convinced.
>>43578468
Owlbear guy is glitching out. I saw owlbear stats posted in a thread that wasn't even about statting something.
>>43575312
I'm helping.
>>43576616
>any potential disaster from there is impossible to defend against
Bullshit, we can deflect asteroids right now, if we can detect them. Cheaply, even. We don't need a bunch of miners to land on it and nuke it at all. Once we know it's orbit and location we just need a decently powered laser, and just pulse at it at intervals. Vaporizing a tiny section of the asteroid generates thrust, which will push it into a new orbit when done dozens or hundreds of times. Just redirect the thing into the sun. Cheaper and more effective than trying to hit it with a missile.
Sure, we can't do anything about massive X-ray or gamma ray bursts, but that shit is rarer than the dozens of free-roaming near earth asteroids that are all extinction level events waiting to happen.
>>43580580
Incidentally, a major part of current Aquaman is that all the horrible alien shit at the bottom of the ocean is coming to the surface to eat...well pretty much everything.
>>43577176
Man, these things were a subplot in David Brin's Earth. The underwater section was pretty spooky.
>>43582269
Great as his worldbuilding is, I challenge you to find a single elegantly constructed sentence in any David Brin book at all.
>>43581909
>Why so? I often hear this touted as a downside of immortality, but I'm not convinced.
Studies on sensory deprivation and the lesser example of "cabin fever" have shown very clear connections between mental health and mental stimulus. Most people can't stand just a few hours of wakeful idleness without inventing something to fill the time. Many can't even go for minutes without sensory input and fill in voids with things like humming, drumming their fingers, fidgeting, cracking their knuckles, pacing, and so on. Total sensory deprivation (which involves sealing someone in a lightless, soundproof tank filled with a body-temperature saline solution which blots out sensations of touch, warmth, taste, and smell, in extreme cases featuring anesthetics and an IV drip to remove the sensation of hunger over long periods) is sometimes used as a torture method and can result in irreparable mental harm within a day of confinement.
Put simply: your brain is geared to maintain itself under the assumption that it's going to be processing information. Without input, it tends to goes into feedback loops or start trying to find (and react to) patterns in the background static of the nervous system.
>>43579045
We've almost made mother nature our bitch, and after that we will take on father physics. When his head is on our mantle we shall carve spears fit to slay grandfather Math and tear him from his throne upon which we will sit, waiting for his master to come calling.
>>43579091
>>but ultimately, life is pretty much boned by thermodynamics.
>Sounds like quitter talk to me.
This guy here.
This guy work for the therian project. What are you doing to save the universe future?
>>43581999
and what the fuck is hiding in the waves?
>>43582487
A million years alone in space might make me go mad, and a billion years I may spend that way, but who's to say on my trillionth birthday I will not be sane?
Anyone who thinks immortality isn't worth it is fucking small time. Fuck your "oh my friends will die" immortality. Fuck your "but it'll be boring in space" immortality.
I want to be the kind of immortal who measures the rise and fall of reality itself on the minute hand.
>>43582915
In that case, algae.
>>43582924
I'm sure in the meantime somebody'll make us VR implants or something, Anon, don't worry.
Or we'll just have very long naps.
>>43582487
>Total sensory deprivation
I thought that resulted in hallucinations.
>>43583037
That's what happens when your brain starts interpreting that static as though it were normal (I.e. ordered) sensory input. It gets so desperate to find SOMETHING it recognizes that it drops its standards way, way down.
It's like seeing shapes in clouds. A cloud shaped like a rabbit isn't going to contain even a hundredth of the actual appearance of a rabbit, just the broadest, most basic outline. Your brain picks up the outline, makes a connection, then starts filling in the blanks based on what it expects to see unless strongly contradicted by other input. You see a cloud that kind of looks like bunny ears, and you subconsciously start looking for the rest of the rabbit.
In this case, your body "sees" something in the background static of your nerves and the tiny nervous returns from the heartbeat-driven flexing of your retinas, and it starts to fill in the blanks. But since there's no strong input to override the white noise pouring into your brain, those feedback loops never get broken. They just keep reinforcing themselves as the brain rationalizes what it continues to hallucinate as being the logical result of previous erroneous perceptions.
>>43582924
>but who's to say on my trillionth birthday I will not be sane?
Proton decay.
>>43583298
Immortal.
>>43575894
That was actually confirmed to be ice berg cracking.
>>43583370
OK. You decay without having died beforehand. That's hardly unprecedented.
Besides, why would you even WANT to live through a million consecutive lifetimes of absolutely nothing? Even if the human mind were physically capable of both surviving and coping with that (it's capable of neither), what would be the point? That would be the very definition of boredom.
>>43575611
This sounds like a larger version of a Phase Spider.
>>43582487
>Without input, it tends to goes into feedback loops or start trying to find (and react to) patterns in the background static of the nervous system.
Sounds like a great way to work out inner demons; cross through the flames of insanity without shattering, and you come out an unbreakable man.
>>43583430
I want to see what happens next.
>>43582810
>we shall carve spears fit to slay grandfather Math and tear him from his throne upon which we will sit, waiting for his master to come calling.
"See, the thing about God being perfect is that, since he's perfect, he can't improve. Man has no such limit."
So /tg/, are you up to that challenge of surpassing perfection?
>>43583430
>Even if the human mind were physically capable of both surviving and coping with that (it's capable of neither)
Not with that kind of talk it isn't!
>what would be the point?
Don't ask 'why?', ask 'why not?'; besides, at that point we'd likely be capable of making our own worlds to fuck around with.
>>43575456
We won't have space horror until we find native space species. Those will be the true horror.
>>43576597
>in the course of time the new vacuum would sustain, if not life as we know it, at least some structures capable of knowing joy.
>This possibility has now been eliminated.
>>43576597
>tfw you stumble upon high level wikipedia concept pages
>thread starts as normal
>devolves into Gurren Langan
any good deep sea RPGs out there, or at least systems that could support a deep sea exploration campaign?
>>43574992
This reminds me of that SCP that's like a giant mass of meat-barnacles that eats people and turns them into rape zombies
>>43584844
The fuck...?
stat me?
>>43584844
>>43584920
http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-835
This one.
>>43585099
>Spooky discussion of underwater horrors.
>Ruin it with weebshit.
>>43575218
VINTAGE MEME
I
N
T
A
G
E
>>43585220
>rood
>>43585360
not that guy, but did you really think you were making a relevant post?
>>43583430
The human brain and human mind are two very different things.
>>43574628
>>43585532
>Stat me /tg/
>relevant post?
I feel it was relevant to the general thread. Maybe not to a specific conversation happening in this thread but to the general thread yes it was relevant.
>>43581999FUCK!
>>43576469
>>43576745
God damn the ocean is metal.
I really hope those fish get strong enough to blast lightning out of their eyeballs.
Someone should be working on that.
If you closely examine anything in this existence, it is horrifying.
The deep sea, nature and space objects. Space objects is the big one for me. There are things up there that eat starts and warp reality, drifting around at immense speed, things that could pull you in from millions of kilometers away and obliterate the very matter you are made of.
One of the reasons I want to have tonnes of kids is in hope somewhere down the line some of my descendants will find something better.
Sorry earth, I know there are too many humans but I need my offspring to outcompete others and get my genetic material far far away from anything in this universe.
>>43587833
Eat stars*
Of course I enjoy the nicities of many things that exist.
So I'm not bothered by the great unknkwns, monstrous lifeforms or disturbing truths.
I exist, gotta make my mark on the universe, do my part as a human and not worry about the terror round every corner.
> you will never find a deep sea fishperson who just wants her eggs to be fertilized
>>43581999
>>>4358199
>>43582915
Seaweed would be my guess.
>>43576496
Imagine that fucking you in the dickhole with those jelly tentacles
>>43589130
ND pls go.
>>43574628
Ah yes, the sea spider, #167258 on the list of "Why the Ocean is a Fucking Terrible and Horrifying Place"
Like this one, #84720
>>43584619
Source on that webm?
>>43582891
>AT-43
My African friend.
>>43591647
>underwater vore hell
>>43574697
>closely packed
>gonids
>closely packed gonads
>>43576063
>>43576248
Its cute in a monstrous way.
