Alright /tg/. I wanna hear your worst stories of D&D, 40k, Shadowrun, Call of Cthulu, GURPS, Rifts, anything you play that falls under the umbrella of a TTRPG. I want the cringiest and most annoying players, worst stories, creepiest happening. I'll begin.
>Invited to play D&D
>Huge AD&D and BECMI fag
>Playing with standard group of friends
>DM is a pretty cool guy, but it's his first D&D campaign
>Come over
>We're playing a modified version of 4e
>ohshitniggerwhatareyoudoing.jpg
>we get dailies and abilities (basically fighting styles and the occasional spell) but no cantrips or actual spells from the spell list, and doesn't quite grasp the monster manual
>Our typical elfrogue is an obnoxious edgelord, obsessed with Batman and shitting on everyone else, obviously chooses chaotic retarded
>Our wizard refuses to stop joking and intentionally breaks the game because he wants to be a fucking rubix cube, and his daily is turning into a firetruck because LMAOOOO XD XD SO RANDUMZ!!!!!
>Our fighter is basically a drunken homeless dwarf who shits himself constantly and uses brass knuckles and chairs as weapons, actually kind of funny
>Our Druid is just some druid
>Choose to be a vampire fighter
>DM gives them free reign but he somehow expects anyone but me to try and follow the story
>Over the course of the session I:
>Get my gear stolen by the rogue on his first turn
>Get roofied and pimped out as an unconcious sex doll by by group
>Level up once
>Get pushed off an airship and killed, while the guy that came down with me barely suffered a scratch
>Get my soul trapped in a teapot
>Spend 3/4s of the game doing absolutely fucking nothing
>Spend half of the time getting mocked by the rogue
>Get a temporary body for the endgame boss
>The boss is a monster with Lvl 18 Black Dragon stats
>We're all level 2
>Takes a couple hours and a shit ton of rule breaking to even kill it
>Get elected to be the DM for the next game
As you might have guessed, I declined.
It's not much of a story on my end, but I was once part of a group that was hosted at the DM's house. The DM was good, and the players were good too.
The thing that happened was that one of the older players; a guy I'm calling Joe. Joe is I think was in his late 40's and seemed like a regular guy and played a good witty character. Well on one particular session, I caught Joe in the room of the DM's 9 year old daughter stealing her underwear.
To this day I think my DM was a saint for handling the situation as well as he did (Not killing him on the spot). Joe was taken away by the police, and I don't know what happened to him since; nor do I care to know.
>>44136338
Holy fucking shit man
>>44136338
did you make this up?
>>44136338
>>44136767
Yeah, any person in their right mind would have fucking beaten Joe's face in
>>44136338
Anon please
BUMP we need real fuckin stories
>>44135875
Wait, undead are immune to poison. How did you get roofied?
>>44137247
The DM didn't follow immunities for the sake of "making encounters easier", but I just don't think he knew they existed
>>44136338
>>44136338
Jesus
>>44135875
I once played in a game for 9 months before finding out the whole (shitty) campaign was covert therapy for one of the players. He came out to us as an otherkin at the last session then got offended when we didn't give him a standing ovation for his "bravery".
Fuck that asshole DM for tricking me into spending months helping the druid come to terms with "bear-self" in real life, and making me forever DM to keep it from happening again.
>>44138551
>groupmates been reading up on 5e
>wants to dm
>we agree since our current campaign is running down
>session starts off pretty well and we burn through chargen
>typical you wake up in the woods no memory type deal
>clothes on our back and still got our basic weapons
>decide finding shelter and a pseudo base is first order of business
>find random cave thats bigger on the inside than you'd suspect upon first seeing it
>sounds like a winner
>inspect the cave
>caves huge but empty except for an odd door in the back
>vote on checking it out because a mine could lead somewhere or to cash of some sort
>we head in
>its a blank 12x12x12 room with torches lighting it up and 3 identical doors and 2 hatches one ontop and one on bottom
>check the doors and hatches
>leads to identical rooms cept one has a skeleton in it
>after luggin our asses human pyramid style through the ceiling we get to the skeleton
>has a note on it
"No escape"
>in big jagged letters written in presumably blood
>okay.
>explore the dungeon for an hour
>same room over and over
>start thinking theres a trick so we leave these markers like a boot or piss puddle
>never see any of the markers ever
>entire time DM's giggling away everytime he describes the room
>no matter what we do to check its just a plain fucking room
>we all crack after 2nd hour cause this shit from all angles can't be solved or we're seriously missing something
>with a huge shit eating grin on his face dm says
"Thats just it!"
-giggle fit-
"Its not a puzzle..its a hypercube!"
-breaks down in laughter-
"The only way out is to realize its a hypercube then the door would have opened up back to the cave!"
>3/4 of us are visibly thinking about how hard it is to get away with murder
"Okay. Okay. You're out of the cave. Sorry i just always wanted to use that."
>we all agree while were here we might as well see how the rest goes
>first town we get to he describes the townsfolk
Cont.
>>44138551
Was GM pc a druid or a awakened bear?
>>44139199
"You see humans in the townsquare. But somethings off. They're all covered in fur!"
>we figure werewolves or something right?
>wrong
"They all have cat faces and whiskers! Even tails! But they're definitely human."
>is adamant they aren't catfolk but straight up humans with cat features
>shows us papers of orcs with pig and boar features
>elves with bird features etc
>before we can even begin to figure out how the fuck we ended up here he goes
"But wait...you've got animal features too!"
>hands out relevant papers
>humans are cats, warforged is an armadillo for some reason, halfling is a fucking platypus
>we all stand up and leave no talking necessary
We never invited him back. The fucking cat human page had a very distinct section about public bathing and bathing others the way cats do
We had a group, it's still going but it's starting to die. Naheulbeuk, Mutant & Mastermind, Palladium, we had a few system that worked well until recently. The GM expected us to remember 4 years of 6-7 different settings and put all of it into a single one where you could not do anything without remembering exactly what happend at a given time in one of those sessions. He went back to something more classic now but I lost the motivation to play with him as a DM long ago...
>I wanted to DM something in a zombie apocalypse setting
>The team
>Our usual DM, let's call it Steve wanted to play anyway.
>He had a big thing for narratives and could not do a single campaign without making a DMPC (the one that stay back in fight but does all the RP).
>We had one powergamer (who refused to shut up when we called bullshit on his "theory", I swear I lost at least 2 whole day in those discussion)
>The guy who only play barbarian/tank and could not configure his mic so that every one speak on the same level
>You don't know what it's like not to be heard and the action you called simply didn't happen because the DM was to busy chatting with the Powergame and calming the tank
>the guy who only like to role play
>And me who spend more time tuning my character than actually playing, so that it fit my expectation in skills, fight, and background (not a minmax but more a specialist)
>Now you see the band
>I decided to use Dead Reign from Palladium because it was almost the same system in our other games of Heroes Unlimited
>I wrote the big lines taking inspiration in the "Feed" Trilogy and "WWZ"
>It took place after the zombie where some what beaten and humanity managed to get road working between secured cities
>There's still plenty of zombie out there
>The PCs work for a small blog and create content by going out and smashing some rotten heads
>The more fun it looks the more they get paid
Cont.
>>44139542
>where you could not do anything without remembering exactly what happend at a given time in one of those sessions.
Continuum?
>They have the choice between 3 big archetypes that divide and cross into smaller classes
>The Irvin who is just there for the fun of blowing up things and using his weapon
>The reporter/camera man who uses his skill to get the most of what the Irvin does and is there to discover things and experiment with the dead or just get to an objective film there and get back
>The bard who by nature is more reclusive is a special class that stay in the van and uses drones to get intel about the surrounding and stay in contact with the other
>It's important to note that no one was fully one of those classes
>Steve choose to go full bard with an arsenal of drone and skills to search past info about places and explecitly asked to stay in the van
>The role player was more reporter than Irvin
>The powergamer, you guess it, was a pure Irvin.
>They get upset because "I try to confine them in classes"
>First time DMing by the way
>Hour of explaining with them weeks beforehand that those are not fixed and one can take the job of the other two archetypes to make his own PC
>I did not even started explaining the setting yet, how could they already bitch about how something fit in a setting they didn't understand
>When the day came, I could sense that something wasn't right
>Go check on steam
>The role player was on fucking payday2
>Ask him to close and connect on our dice roller
>Steve seemed strange, like he didn't want to play
>Yet he was the one who harassed me to do it and he had not even a plan to make another campaign at the time
>He get his drone flying and scout the city
>And the powergamer was already asking for bullshit weapon and equipment (not even in the book or relevant to the setting)
>"I heard the US army is making working laser now, if we're in the future and the civilization is still there it must be in store right now. Oh and because amazon said they were doing their drone delivery thing, i want it here!"
Cont.
>>44139542
What was the "theory"?was it thermite?
>>44135875
Things that never happened general.
>Our fighter is basically a drunken homeless dwarf who shits himself constantly and uses brass knuckles and chairs as weapons, actually kind of funny
Dirtfarmer realismfag confirmed.
>>44139592
No, it's more simple. A homebrew french RPG session, one big game of Heroes Unlimited who span over 2 real years, the same over a year with a dimensional warrior setting an some other things we did in between those. He asked of us to remember names, events, places, etc... Seeing how he managed to get me invested in the previous game (I now hate skype session because of the badly configured mic of other)... A real nightmare, for 5 hour every friday I sat in front of my computer listening to some DM speaking his mind over things and telling a story...
>>44139691
No it's worse than that, I'll tell you when I'm done with the greentext
>>44139542
>>44139623
>Say no and try to move on, I know where this will be going if I give if the slightest bit of power over the other
>First encounter goes well, they begin to understand the behavior of my zombies
>They ask why there are no fast zombie, why Steve is in the van and not on the field, and bitch about every single detail in the setting
>It's there it strucked me
>It's only after the game that the role player confirm what I thought
>He and Steve choose to deliberately fuck up my session by being the worst player possible
>I still not know if this was some kind of joke to get me to surpass myself and be a better GM of just because they thought that I was like that in their sessions
>I can never speak because of the tank anyway and when I do the powerbullshiter is always there to take back the attention.
>I'm the more passive in skype session, yet the total opposite IRL games
>They get upset after realizing they could not make the kitchen explode because the gas company didn't deliver anymore
>They get every useless junk they can, put it on a office chair and push it in the street
>Making noise like never before and singing all the way
>It went on for two hour and I lost it when Steve gave me a list and asked me if it was in the home depot the two other where in
>I ask why and he refuse to tell until I say if they are there or not
>It seemed ok, regular pipe stuff, a compressor, the usual stuff ou find there and the region had just been reclaimed
>On it was written what he found on internet to make a potato launcher
>Not your hobby sausage launcher, no...
>A FUCKING MILITARY GRADE JUNK LANCHER
>We argued for about an hour on the probility this would work, that he would even find the blueprint, etc...
>The fucker wouldn't let it go, he had clearly no skills to do it and even if he found it on the internet it doesn't mean he could do it
>Hell, this thing was huge and required powertools
Cont.
>>44139542
>>44139623
>>44139841
Holy shit dude what the fuck is wrong with your grammar
>>44139885
He's French.
>>44139542
>This entire post.
>Playing with a group that you seem to dislike this much.
Anon, you're probably just as bad as your group.
>I abandoned the idea of reasonning him when he said he was planning to put it on the front of the van and make it fully functional and shooting bricks
>Next they went in a abandoned house outside the city where they found a family taking refuge for the night
>The dad ran away from the society he worked for, because of shady stuff going on
>Before he even had a chance to speak
>"He looks suspicious, I shoot him"
>Tell them to fuck off, close skype and see steam still open
>The role player and the powergamer where in a fucking game and for at least half the session
>The worse is that I had a long discussion with Steve where I explained everything that I felt were wrong with this and it ended by him saying this
>"Look, I know I am stubborn and this discussion will never end if you keep going on. Just say that it's not my fault and that I did nothing wrong and we'll end it there"
>I never forgave him this and he never said he was sorry even tough the role player accepted that this was a bad idea and appologized to me.
>>44139885
Yeah sorry, it's late here and It's been a long time since I written in english something else than "I agree" of "Hey I like this too"
>>44139928
The hate came after that, at the time it was still ok. Now I have my other group at the college.
>>44140038
Yeah, Anon. I'm sorry to say, but your group meme'd you out. They probably didn't just kick you, because they thought they'd get a laugh out it.
>3.5
>DMs first game
>DM allows stat draining
>Thisisgonnabegood.jpeg
>I decided on cleric of Kord
>Wasn't the best character I made, I admit. I had no idea what kind of person I wanted to make him
>Fellow player drains INT, WIS, and CHA into STR stat.
>Fucking barbarian half orc has like, 26 STR at level one
>His mental stats are at minimum
>Honestly one of the better roleplayers in the group. Was hilarious and we honestly all love this character
>Other members consist of Dwarf fighter that did nothing.
>12 year old style of cool elf ranger
>And the motherfucking Gnome sorcerer
>Would hinder us by casting stupid ass spells just to annoy us, for example, once casted Mass Orgasm from the Book of Erotic Fantasy on us
>Barbarian hated this fucker
>Had one time raged and slapped him unconscious at one point
>Not punched, SLAPPED
>Duo had the best character dynamic in the campaign, they were hilarious together
>Main NPC was a Factotum so OP it begged the question of why we even had to do anything
>Could literally do whatever he wanted at points
>Still hate Factotums because of him
>DM is too generous with XP
>We get to like, level 8 really quick
>Barbarian is extremely powerful at this point
>DM fears him
>So much so, we got "randomly generated magic items" that obviously pointed this out
>Cleric of Kord gets flaming greatsword
>Elf gets cloak of elvenkind
>Dwarf gets a shield that thunders when hit
>Sorcerer gets necklace of fireballs
>Barbarian gets potion of jump
>Later Barbarian's father plans on invading civilization
>Barbarian gets flaming greataxe From dead dad
>Turns out the axe drained willpower so shapeshifting mindflayers could charm the cheiftains easily
>Was honestly cool twist
>He comes at us because charmed
>A guest player we had throws a fire crystal at and nearly kills barbarian
>DM panics and has Mind Flayers cast disintigrate on barbarian
>Dies in cutscene
>We Revolt
>We pool our money together and resurrect him
>Best and worst campaign I played.
>>44138551
>the wizard in my game is playing as an awakened monkey, even when the rest of the party is playing only core races
Oh dear. It might be just the mechanical bonuses, but...
BAMP
>>44139199
Yeah, this is what happens when you try and make stupid ideas from /tg/ work in real campaigns
>>44139376
Wait, hold up. So one of your regular player friends did a really, really shitty job DMing, but does that retroactively mean he's that bad of a player, too? That just seems kinda unnecessary.
One DM had a hard on for wights. So much so that we were actually LOWER level at the end of the campaign than when we started. Started at level 5 and 4 months later we ended the game with the party at levels 1-2.
>>44138551
I had to google what an otherkin was, and dear God I wish I hadn't. I'm so sorry Anon, how did you not suffer permanent brain damage being in such close proximity to that level of stupid?
>>44141271
He turned us and everything in setting into furries and forced us into it. He went far enough to write out how cat humans will just stop, strip naked, and bathe. Sometimes they're joined by other cats and they bath each other. Its nohomo if 2 guys do this.
I've been down to many similar rabbit holes to not know where that goes and i am not going to go bathing some random guy just so we don't raise suspicion or something.
>>44145034
I don't blame you for bailing on his campaign. But why stop associating with him entirely as a player?
>>44145108
Why not? He seemed to think leading us into furry magical realm was okay. Also if he though the bathing thing was going to be socially acceptable to us somethings off there. From experience its better to just cut the bad fruit the second they crop up or risk the group.
>>44145178
>Why not?
Because apparently he was an all right guy before you knew he thought that would be a good idea.
>muh bad fruit, muh degenerates
Oh, for fuck's sakes. You couldn't just talk to him like adults and explain that everyone else thought it was fucking weird?
>>44145223
If the guy actually went ahead and did that, he's likely to do something stupid again, especially if he didn't apologize, or even try to say it was a joke.
Suppose they did sit down and tell him it was weird. He laughs it off. Next session as a player, he's doing some similar bullshit, and ruins a game.
If the choice is between wasting your life and not playing in a potentially fun game, why bother with the guy? You can probably find someone who isn't going to stupid something stupid to take his place.
>Friend wants to run Call of Cthulhu
>Party is made up of me, a /k/ommando, and 3 other people who had never played an RPG before
>GM tells us the game is going be based in Miskatonic Uni
>Character lineup at the first game: lit professor (me), history professor, doctor, european nobleman, WW1 veteran (/k/ommando)
>first quest we are sent into the south-american jungle looking for a lost expedition
>why.jpg
>first few sessions are a grueling march into the jungle, constantly attacked by natives
>no NPCs to interact with
>no investigations whatsoever
>/k/ommando is the only dude with a gun
>somehow we get to some incan(?) ruins
>I take a big San loss due to a vision
>Doctor starts to feed me drugs without my consent
>GM rules that I have become an addict, so I'm even more useless
>We find the guy who was missing
>/k/ommando shoots him, not fatally
>/k/ommando argues that since we're in the jungle and the guy has no medical attention, the guy should get worse
>GM rules he dies
>Suddenly, natives everywhere
>last session is basically Predator, with the /k/ommando and a couple NPCs shooting up natives and the rest of us trying not to die
>Game ends during the boat trip back
It's not as much a horror story as other I've read here, but it was a pretty bad campaign. The doctor guy was super-creepy and constantly making rape jokes and mimicking sexual acts. One time the DM met a friend of his at the bar before the game, and he tagged along and proceeded to spend the night telling the DM how it would be cooler if one of the characters did X instead of what the player said, and even managed to break my dice box before leaving.
>"Wow anon I'm so hype for this new sesh!"
>Fucko 2 as some midlife crisis, calls game off for everyone
>great
>wait till x day then
>x day comes
>Aforementioned fucko made plans
>Now planned for another x day
IF I get fucked a third time, I'm calling it off.
>>44140038
This ending fills me with such anger, I cannot fucking stand when people refuse to see what they were doing as wrong and take pride in being a colossal ass.
>>44136338
This is the 5th time I've read this story, and I have become exceedingly efficient at it
>>44136338
>it turns out he forgot it was date night and he's gotta go meet his girlfriend, with no time to go home
>he's wearing his lucky D&D underwear, which are disgusting, so in desperation he runs to the first room he can find and starts looking for underwear
https://youtu.be/Ag1o3koTLWM
>>44139542
>Feed trilogy
Good taste anon
Worst Player
>Dark Heresy game
>makes some unbearable edgelord mercenary that tots killed 300 people with snipers, gorilla warfare, etc.
>backstory is just four pages of "I killed monsters, soldiers and babies"
>tell him to re-write everything by the day we start
>radio silence until start day and when he arrives, he just added another page to his "I rule" list
>0 synergy with the group, acts like a deranged psychopath
>first investigation gets fucked because he kept killing people before the cell had any chance at interacting with them
>turn for the worst once new player joins
>new player is a slav and That Guy as I found out later was legit /pol/ack, so naturaly loathes him
>when new player does cool thing, That Guy tries to do "cooler" thing
>attempts at out-cooling end with destroyed critical evidence, escalation of gang-wars into civil-wars and dead witnesses
>very adamant about not using the rules when it isn't convinient for him to do so
>multiple attempts to kick him are halted via players threatening revolt
>Fateful day comes
>Edgy McBloodsword kills their most important prisoner in a slow flaying he called an "interogation"
>new player's character handcuffs him and attempts to put a bomb collar on him
>other characters assist, because this shit was getting out of hand
>he keeps trying to unpin his grenades, retconning that he has them on his chest
>deny him, say he's restrained
>keeps trying to punch them, not even attempting to break his cuffs which he could do effortlessly
>skype drops, go to friend's house to hog some internet
>he has declared to have unpinned his grenades and killing everyone
>"No, That Guy. You don't do that."
>silence from him for about 20 minutes
>leaves the game, deletes others from skype and bids me farewell
>>44152920
Sounds like a clusterfuck.
>multiple attempts to kick him are halted via players threatening revolt
Wait, so the other players liked him?
Run of the mill lazy DM.
No descriptions of events, NPCs or locations. introduced a gladiator pit, when the party attacks the pit fighters they ignore us and keep fighting each other. Entire party is edgelord magical shit, so just spend half an hour casting spells at this horde of bullshit. DM decides a long rest happens after every fight, god forbid they run out if magic. I'm trying to play a crossbow fighter, fucking DM bitches at me for not doing as much damage as the sorcerors.
the best part was she thought i'd want her in any game i ran since.
>>44148244
I've had that happen before. My group alternated each week between two DMs so each one had two weeks to work on their game instead of one, and DM1 kept calling in on the week that DM2 ran, and would come back the next week and run his game. We started to believe DM1 hated DM2's game despite it being more fun.
>>44154072
That's a shame. I was wanting to run a gladiator game but it was highly focused on the players' owner, having to protect him outside of the ring in between events while he's politically bribing/betraying rivals and gladiator cliques. Gladiator campaigns have a lot of potential.
>>44146533
Have you considered not playing CoC?
