Your character has to get the bread and milk.
>comes back with ale and an elf wench
>>44108498
>Everything surprisingly goes just fine, you get the bread and milk without any issues whatsoever.
>Come back, the house is a smoking crater and the rest of the party is either dead or in the process of being detained by law enforcement.
Sir Horvath looked upon the dying wizard at his feet, the dead minions that surrounded them. The wizards plans had been foiled, his evil empire crushed. Sir Horvath had done it, after four years of campaigning across the northern wastelands, fighting in two separate wars, finding and subsequently losing the love of his life, inciting a rebellion that lead to the total ruin of the grand city of Kinsvik and getting elected as the Supreme Magistrate of The Order of The Eagle, he (and the army he had amassed) had brought down the tyrannical ruler of the north, the evil wizard Beghaer and his marauder armies.
The wizard was still alive, which was surprising considering the horrific wounds he had suffered. Maybe it was through pure stubborness or magical prowess, but he was still alive. Sir Horvath, the only survivor of the force directly attacking the wizards inner sanctum, leaned over his dying nemesis, waiting for the light in his eyes to fade. To his surprise, the wizard spoke. "There are hidden treasures in here, Paladin. Many rooms filled with riches your looting army will never find" He said, sputtering a drizzle of blood and saliva across his chest. "If you help me heal myself, and escape, it could all be yours"
Sir Horvath leaned over his fallen enemy, face set in stone, an iron hard gleam in his eyes. He grabbed a handful of the wizards black robes and pulled him close, "The only thing I want to know from you, abomination, is this" He pulled the wizard even closer, and in an almost inaudible whisper "I need to find the pantry, a man needs some bread and milk"
>>44108498
>>44111176
So, Shadowrun?Because organic food is not cheap at all.
>>44108498
Strong hope we find Milk of Human Kindness soon.
>>44111046
>helmet with two types of eye holes
Don't get me wrong it looks cool but what the fuck?
>>44111664
His right eye shoots lasers. Clearly.
Actually I think I see scorch marks, might not even be entirely wrong.
One laughs, and tells the others to find a cow if they want milk.
The other heads to one of his cultists farms to get a bucket of milk and a loaf of bread from the baker
The last shrugs and goes to the grocery store.
>>44108498
I WILL MAKE MILK WITHOUT THE USE OF A COW!
DWARF SCIENCE!!!
>>44108498
>Your character has to get the breast and milk
>>44108498
>you only brought back powdered milk and croutons
>>44115031
ya dingus
>>44115167
Not everyone is some kind of hunk like you who owns a broat and like 50 loafs of bread and cow juice
>>44108498
I start sobbing OOC. It's a milk run; a literal milk run. And as we all know, milk run jobs ALWAYS have complications.
>>44111389
It was great until the end.
>>44111702
>>44111664
Or it could be because if you're blind in one eye you don't need that part of the helmet to have an eye hole.
>aquire milk and bread for free because I will forever be that guy that "beat something to death with its own ass"
>>44108498
I'm just not that enthusiastic about bread and milk, OP.
>>44108498
It's cool; we're cops.
Absolutely NOTHING could go wrong! It's just getting Bread and Milk, so what could possibly happen to prevent us from safely acquiring and returning with these things?
She has them delivered through Kevin Costmore's Shopperworld.
Come rain, snow or end of the world, they'll see you through.
She comes back quickly and overjoyed with 5 2L bottles and 3 loaves (one of half-eaten raisin loaf). A massive milk mustache on her face as she talks about how strange and decadent it is to drink milk of other animals and amazed at all the different breads.
Then calms down after her spil and goes back to business of being suspicious.
Can a wizard actually summon bread and milk easily by RAW?
Create Food and Water - No milk, "bland" fare
Minor Creation - Specifies vegetable matter
Major Creation - Only adds metals/minerals, no meats/dairies
Would he literally be forced to teleport over and get it/send a minion to do it?
Can wizards create milk and eggs with magic?
>>44119696
>Master of the arcane, time and space
>can materialize meteors and lightning from the aether
>cannot summon milk or bread
I guess he could cast Genesis and make like a milkbread plane and then open a gate to it or something.
>>44108498
>bread and milk
>in Sandpoint
>not eating delicious Tien cuisine at the Rusty Dragon
>>44119696
You could use Summon Monster to summon a chicken or a cow, if you're playing 3.X. PF has some weird rule about not allowing you to use everything, so I dunno if you can summon normal animals using Summon magic there.
>>44119974
Chickens and cows aren't on the summon monster list.
You could get Eagle Eggs I guess at Summon I. If you want milk that isn't like rat milk or pony milk, it won't be until Summon IV for Bison.
>>44119939
My cleric wouldn't take too kindly to that.
"Fucking Varisians can't appreciate the basics."
>>44108498
But he would get the bread and milk.And try best he could not to ogle Aneka.
>>44119939
You need the bread and milk because Ameiko makes those dishes very spicy.
>>44120066
Pretty sure you could use Nature's Ally for a cow, but that'd be a scroll for a Wizard.
>>44120188
Summon Nature’s Minor Ally can get the chicken, since it only specifies the HD/tiny animal part, so that one is okay.
The closest analogy to cow though is Auroch with Nature's Ally 3 and Bison at Nature's Ally 4. Pretty rough just for some milk.
>the party heads down to the corner mart for some bread and milk.
>20 minutes later the shoot out is all over the news.
>5 minutes after that their faces are on the front of every news feed in North America.
>An hour after the first shot was fired the death toll is in the hundreds and the party is trying like hell to stow away on a cargo ship bound for anywhere but here.
And this is why I don't let the Shadowrun group have down time any more.
>>44120267
Milk's a pretty expensive commodity, though, since it spoils so quickly. It'd make sense mechanically for you to not have easy-mode access to it.
>summon cow
>Milk it
>Sell the milk
>all of your spell slots are Summon Cow
>repeat until out of spell slots.
>Sleep and repeat
>do this for weeks, going around to various towns and selling milk.
It's not like you're going to be swimming in gold or anything, but it'd be an easy as fuck way for a druid or ranger to pick up some quick survival/supply funds.
>>44120329
Rat milk is way more nutritious technically. Should just honestly summon and milk rats and sell it without specifying it's rat milk.
>>44119696
>>44119820
>>44120066
>>44119974
>>44120188
>>44120188
>>44120267
>>44120329
>>44120376
And this is why I come to /tg/.
>easiest way to stymie a low-to-mid-level wizard is to make him try and get you some bread and cow milk
>>44120376
wasn't this a Simpson's episode
>>44120530
Wrong Simpsons' milk, friendo.
>>44120716
damn, what do you know
