/heem/: cruz edition
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Upcoming events:
6/10: Titan FC 39 (Cavalcante vs Healy)
6/12: Pancrase 278 (Sunabe vs Haita)
6/17: Bellator 156 (Galvao vs Dantas)
6/17: EFN Global (Fedor vs Maldonaldo)
6/18: UFC FN 89 (MacDonald vs Thompson)
6/24: Bellator 157 (Jackson vs Ishii)
6/25: GLORY 31 (Vakhitov vs Bouzidi)
7/1: ONE FC (TBA)
7/7: UFC FN 90 (Dos Anjos vs Alvarez)
7/8: TUF 23 Finale (Jedrzejczyk vs Gadelha)
7/9: UFC 200 (DC vs Jones 2)
7/10: UFC Hall of Fame Inductions
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7/16: Bellator 158 (Kimbo vs Thompson)
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7/24: Pancrase 279 (Ishiwatari vs Brookins)
7/29: Invicta FC 18 (TBA)
7/30: UFC 201 (Lawler vs Woodley)
Previous thread: >>68134100
News:
>Lesnar's opponent to be announced on ESPN tomorrow
http://www.mmamania.com/2016/6/5/11861508/ufc-200-brock-lensar-opponent-to-be-announced-on-monday-june-6-mma
>Rockhold is buttmad
http://www.mmafighting.com/2016/6/5/11860658/luke-rockhold-after-losing-ufc-title-to-d-ck-michael-bisping-i-want-kill-him-ufc-199
>MMA Digest update
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1cfDYvuyZc
Schaub
First for Weedman MW champ
First for Bigfoot is Borks opponent
shob
Ngannou vs. Brock
That's the real money fight
>>68142611
HYPE FOR NEXT CHMP
The scariest lookin guy in the roster
Anyone have the updated spicy bangers list with additions from last night?
You're offered $1,000. You can either keep it, or pick one fighter you believe never took a banned substance. If you pick right you get $50,000.
Which fighter do you pick, or do you keep the money?
>>68142611
fucking kill yourself
>>68142704
War Machine
>>68142708
you're even more autistic than I am, I hope you know that
>>68142704
Anybody who wouldn't keep it is retarded.
who would have ever thought Bisping was the GOAT?
>Jon...
>>68142704
CM Punk
Post yfw you remember that Bisping actually heemed Luke
>>68142704
Nick diaz
Would you rather: (a) Rub oil on Lorenzo's upper body or (b) lay naked in the float tank with Joe.
>>68142686
[arm gators excitedly]
>>68142783
get a load of this goof
>>68142748
posting an actual heem instead of that one
time to find a new heem99
>>68142704
natty goat brock
>>68142704
BJ Penn
Is this legal?
My thrilling review of UFC 199 from last thread in case you missed it.
>>68139174
>>68139174
>>68139174
>>68142704
schaub
LMAO
>>68142807
GSP was so mad he got beat up by a manlet after, he literally wanted to kill the guy
Name a fighter with worse striking defense than Paige Sletten.
>>68142760
This
>>68142827
FUUUCK
>>68142708
You're getting emotional.
>>68142838
gb2 worldstar
>>68142827
>implants
10x more pathetic than tattoos
YOU CAN CALL ME LEFT HOOK LARRY FROM NOW ON
>>68142892
>Rafael gets to hit this but had to take in his wife's son
50/50
>>68142827
>this guy is 24 with a wife and a kid
>I'm 23, don't feel like an adult yet
>>68142914
>tfw grappled with her back in the day
>tfw realize pat barry was grooming her all along
This has been the best 18 months to be an MMA fan. No other time period even comes close.
>>68143002
>Rose
Was it a piercing?
Does anyone have spicy webms of Bolo for Kim last night? That fucking match was GOAT. It blessed the entire card with spiciness, one of the best fights ive ever seen desu.
can someone post that Holloway webm please?
Have we seen Stipe on bottom yet?
>>68142840
he said fighter, not podcast personality
>>68143122
>>68142874
>>68143140
why does Holloway have an accent? he's hawaiian, do they only speak broken english there?
What is Cruz's weakness?
>>68143155
>>68143188
everyone has an accent anon, even you
when brock lesnar fucks up whoever he's gonna fuck up at the ufc200, will you still think wrestling 'isn't real'?
>>68143002
Sup /heem/
Have you met/trained with anyone notable? How were they?
>>68142704
George St. Pierre
>>68143155
>finger isn't moving
wtf is that a man?
>wake up
>it actually happened
>its real
>bisbong is the champ
what the fuck is going on
>>68143231
enjoy your shorter lifespan
>>68143265
Destiny is a bitch.
>>68143025
wtf. what is going on there. Her clit is bigger than my dick
>>68143265
>missing one of the greatest cards ever
>>68143151
lmao it's like she's punching a literal chimp
>>68143289
>wtf. what is going on there. Her clit is bigger than my dick
>white guys
>>68143276
assmad manletcuck detected
>>68143140
thanks man the stare downs during Holoway's combo are like a mini-lawler/rory exchanges so good
>>68143265
Those shitposters weren't kidding about 'meme magic'
Anything can happen. Anything. What a sport.
>>68143010
>Starting of 2015 with DC losing to Jones and literally crying like a baby
>Pettis gets meme'd on by RDA for 5 solid rounds
>The height of the Conor and Aldo banter
>Ronda is the greatest athlete of all time for starching Zingano and Bethe
>Jon Jones can't drive and DC recovers from a Rumble haymaker to win
>Just call me Joanna champion
>Memelasquez getting subbed by Werdum
>I will elemenayte Chad Mini Mendes
>Rory - Lawler 2 blood bath
>Super Sage Northcutt haha
>Meme fighters like Ortega, Yair, Almeida, Cody No Love, Sage, Barberrena, Ngannou
>Wonderboy Thompson ending the steak meme
>Holly head-kicks Ronda into pooping in the woods
>Mewvment meme
>Aldo loses in 13 seconds
>Conduit vs. Lawler
>My boy Cruz coming back from retirement and winning the belt.
>Werdum gets KO'd unconscious by Stipe
>Weidman gets defeated cause of a meme kick
>McMemer losing to 10 day Diaz
>Mr and Mrs. Tate with great comeback wins
>Hendo getting cheered like a mad man and coming back to win after being stunned
>Bisping KOs Luke unironically to become the first Brit UFC champion
Did I forget anything?
>>68143025
>>68143289
>roast beef outline
Looks like a stepped on camel toe.
>>68143325
>germany
>white
>>68143226
the fact that CMPunk is failing terribly in his training is already enough evidence
>>68143189
Michael Bisping
>>68143289
>>68143325
Eugene S. Robinson on "If I Did It" said that Germans have the smallest ones in the world.
>>68143333
Classic hmc
>>68143025
well it was certainly piercing, that's for sure
>>68143265
Mohammed Ali's soul powered up Bisping's left hand before going to heaven.
>>68143396
CM Punk is a broken man with a broken body. Brock is a freak athlete.
>>68143333
>underestimating manlets
>>68143440
>tfw no buddy to say 'dont worry about it' when you fuck up big time
>>68143189
deep down he probably doesn't think it's possible for someone to 'catch' him striking, only in ground game which he is very good at avoiding
his unorthodox style is due to the fact that he gives you 6 looks in the amount of time it takes you to give him 2 or 3.
The solution to this is a fighter with an even more unorthodox style.
Take for example, Venom Page. Yes he's 180 lbs, but his style is completely unique and one of the reasons why he has stayed undefeated.
If I were a fighter and I was fighting Cruz, I would try to interrupt his flow, I would be unorthodox with my punches as well, and I'd even try to feint myself into feinting him, so that maybe at a certain angle there is an open window
He would have a much harder time against someone his size, he has only fought one guy taller than him at 5'10" and he is a can
>>68143333
>>68143333
Lanklets couldn't stop losing last night
For sure take the L
>>68143476
Holy shit he really is p4p #1
>>68143301
I watched the entire card
I still can't believe how good it was
>>68143476
>manlets are now making fake videos
>>68143025
>>68143289
She has more test than most males in this board
>>68143416
Makes sense. Most whites in America have Germanic ancestry.
Oh I bet you I could
>>68142874
Dan Henderson
>>68143574
you joke but isn't that the actual reason why we see these types of women in mma?
they are anomalies, their combination of testosterone and estrogen is off the charts
that is why I love women fights, they fight hard
>>68143244
>>68143206
what was it?
>>68143473
exactly, bork being a freak has nothing to do with the fact that mandrama is a TV show for 8 year olds.
>>68143513
Perhaps training disciplines exclusively after a you become competent in the fundamentals is ultimately detrimental. That most effective style/techniques/shots are the ones you don't see coming.
Perhaps this is why Conor did so well, because he put a stronger emphasis on his movement which helped him develop is own style of blending the fundamentals.
BAAROCK LESSNAR
>>68143642
Does that mean that it will be 8 year olds who will boost UFC 200's buy rate?
>>68143513
>and one of the reasons why he has stayed undefeated.
That's about 1% of the reason why he's undefeated.
>>68143687
he is a beast, he would be an absolute star in the UFC but he's making ez $$$ in Bellator, don't kid yourself m8
>>68143624
Ronda said it best, when men fight, they're fighting for pussy, territory, or status; when women fight, they're fighting to save their babies, so they fight a lot harder than men do.
>>68143699
Seriously heem yourself you daft turd
>>68143685
are you fucking kidding me? that's precisely who they're targeting, all the manchildren in /asp/ and casual just bleed fans
bork is barely an afterthought to most serious fans
>>68143659
>cont
If two ammys with fundamentals fight, how is it any different than two rams slamming their heads into each other and seeing who wins?
>>68142989
I'm 27 and still a virgin, how should I feel about this?
>>68143376
not as big as any of those, but Bobby Green getting btfo last night was pretty good.
>>68143772
bobby green is such a joke lmao
>>68142611
Imagine if cruz got KO'd by diving into that upkick. Would've been complete madness.
>>68143624
>>68143730
>that is why I love women fights, they fight hard
You're fucking delusional.
Faber trying to squash to beef at the post-fight presser but Cruz can't let it die like the autist he is. Clear to see why his only friend is his fucking dog
>>68143699
That's the most disgusting thing I've seen this week.
>>68143755
>most serious fans
What do you even mean by this? Are you so dumb you think that UFC and WWE don't have crossover fan bases? Do you even know who Ken Shamrock is?
i'm watching the post fight press conference. bisping is amazing lmao
>>68143768
You should feel good, nearly a wizard.
>>68143818
I love this guy. Should we blow up his social media accounts and slowly get him to swallow the /heem/ pill? I want /heem/ to actually interact with the fighters.
>>68143818
he probably got shook as fuck and sperged out that he was trying to
then he went home and regretted it all night afterwards
>>68143810
>he isn't able to watch and appreciate a fight noticing that there is a lack of physical strength but increase in heart and desire to win the fight
I don't think people understand how crazy these bitches are
>>68143818
>Faber trying to squash to beef
You're a huge dummy if you think Faber was trying to squash anything. He was still being condescending and disparaging to Cruz saying Cody Garbrandt would beat him.
>Cruz can't let it die
It's Faber who has been running his mouth about Cruz since the beginning even while he was still injured you 189er.
>>68143831
fuck off mandrama fag. just because some actual athletes play act in your undie soap opera doesn't mean it's fucking real, which was what started this trollfest.
>>68143768
iktfb
>>68143818
I think it went that way because Faber immediately tried to hype Cody Garbrandt and his gym right after his comment to make a point to Cruz that they're still going to beat him. Of course Cruz is going to dismiss everything he says before that, the "losing venture" jab was fucking hilarious.
>>68143768
You should be able to cast spells by now
>>68143927
Wow you sure are mad for no good reason. Are you sure you're not the manchild?
Who even said anything about it being real or not?
>>68142704
Jason Thatcher
>>68143898
>You're a huge dummy
guys looks like everyone is following suite with Dana's insult dictionary, even I'm doing it.
What's next, goof? I can see myself calling someone a goof in the near future desu, i've already used dummy
>>68143818
I'm pretty sure he likes all the tam guys. He just has a personality clash with faber. I've met faber and he's always operating in "dude-bro" mode.
I _____ you, Monster
>Let's get #UFCArielHawaii trending gais.
>>68143699
>>68143965
>Who even said anything about it being real or not?
>>68143226
an illiterate faggot on top of being a mandrama child, how shocking. fuck off back to >>>/asp/
>>68144018
drink
>>68144065
>Getting that easily baited by Croatia
You're getting emotional and losing your composure over such a trivial thing. Take a deep breath and calm down, then try and read what I said again before sperging out again. Of course everyone knows it's fake you idiot.
>>68144018
ngannou
UFC Middleweight Champion Michael Bisping
Say it out loud lads
>>68143804
i didn't want cruz to lose but this would have made the card 12/10
would've slaughtered vegas on those double underdog parlays for the main and co-main
>>68144126
>herp derp it wuz prank bro :^)
then stop injecting your worthless opinion you fucking moron.
>>68142704
this >>68143983
or just any guy making his pro debut who doesn't look like a roidmonster
![ufc.199.early.prelims.720p.web.h264-kyr.mkv_snapshot_00.25.08_[2016.06.05_15.15.29].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/cTNAnkQ.jpg "ufc.199.early.prelims.720p.web.h264-kyr.mkv_snapshot_00.25.08_[2016.06.05_15.15.29].jpg")
looks like asians just can't produce a single guy UFC level.
Did they invent martial arts to makeup for having weaker bodies?
>>68144018
>>68144220
You call me illiterate yet you can't see that the initial post was made by Croatia and that I just chimed in to say that UFC and WWE have had cross-over fans since the days of Shamrock and Sakuraba. This is a fact, not an opinion, and it's why UFC and WWE can get a shared contract over Brock, and why UFC signed CM Punk.
You probably don't even know who these guys are but instead want to keep acting like a macho hardcore fan when you're probably just another 189er. If you took even 10 seconds to read what I'm saying you'd realize how stupid you're making yourself look in front of everyone ITT
>>68144220
nice dumb autism lad
>>68144363
but dem half asians doe...
>>68144394
maybe he's just pretending bro
>>68144410
>half asians
hope you're talking about the women
>>68144363
Do Ho Choi la
believe you me, believe you me
is the dutch jogger on here?
>>68144410
half english half northern italian masterrace...literally the two best european empires running through my body
>>68144503
>implying bendo isn't handsome as fuck
>>68144394
and what does any of that have to do with the validity of WWE?
stop 'chiming in' with irrelevant shit. you're a fucking illiterate mong and a retard to boot, fuck off.
>>68144396
suck a dick you fucking dago
This thread lacks of Bisping KTFO Salthold.Webm
anyone got it ?
>>68144545
blasians are good, but white halfies are terrible
>>68144608
>>68142838
>thrilling review of 199
>wasn't even there for the fight of the year
Fake fight fan get out
Why do casuals come here? Isn't there a reddit containment board for that?
I think if Rockhold would have just stayed down and pulled guard he would have survived, thoughts /heem/?
>>68144503
1. Aoki Shinya
2. Benson Henderson
3. BJ Penn
4. Kawajiri
5. Caol Uno
>>68144636
>>68144636
Beautiful
>>68144573
>stop 'chiming in' with irrelevant shit
> you're a fucking illiterate mong and a retard to boot, fuck off
Why are you such an angry little man? You were mouthing off about "serious fans" acting as if it's anything new that a pro-wrestler is crossing over to do MMA. In the process of doing this, you just outed yourself as a casual. Talk about shooting yourself in the foot.
>>68144393
>"uhhh.....like I said: I don't make money off any of these guys......he does."
>>68144535
>northern italian masterrace...literally the two best european empires
>norhtern italian empire
literally what? northern italy was occupied by barbarians after the fall of the empire you retard. No empires there.
>>68144689
>>68144636
friendly reminder
>>68143810
>I've never seen an Invicta card in my life
>>68144363
asian shittyness in mma is directly attributable to their dislike and shunning of basic wrassling concepts
yes, they have judo, but it's not the same when you've never had exposure to good wrestlers under different rulesets
>>68144636
At 37 years of age I now hold the key to this game.
The game answers to me now.
>>68144516
funny pic
>>68144761
>People will say Bisping was nice to Luke
Luke was right in being salty, but he was way too salty.
>>68144816
UFC female division is boring as shit desu. Aside from cyborg and holly they suck.
>>68144714
>implying any of that irrelevant shit has anything to do, again, with the original discussion
nah the only thing I'm angry about is that your father didn't pull out like all the other johns and avert the birth of an obtuse goof like yourself.
>>68142874
Rampage
>>68144689
>>68144750
wonder what went through lukes mind after this
post yfw Michael Bisping is the champ
>>68144656
yep, but i give bisping credit for not diving on him and making luke think he had room to get up
>>68144738
>it wasn't part of the roman empire
only pointing out the northern part to ensure you i'm not dark you blithering zero
>>68144859
Well there's two weight classes and usually the fights aren't too bad.
You get some absolute stinkers like the recent Eye vs McMann fight but that style matchup would have been shit whether they're women or not.
>>68144890
>>68144883
"That guy is such a dick. That guy is a piece of shit and I want to fucking come kill him next time. He’s a maggot."
>>68144876
Lol this little kid is so mad. I think it's you who should be heading back to /asp/ with such childish insults. Are you incapable of typing a post where you don't sperg out like a 4 year old whose mommy wont buy him ice cream?
>>68144890
There truly is darkness in this world, the good guy lost.
>>68144947
>only pointing out the northern part to ensure you i'm not dark you blithering zero
you specified empire, when it had nothing to do with the empire you doofus
>>68144750
you can see on this one how lucid luke still after the first punch that dropped him
spinning to stand back up right away dug his own grave though
Luke Thomas getting blown the fuck out on sherdog
http://forums.sherdog.com/threads/luke-thomas-is-the-most-insufferable-mma-journalist-there-is.3259595/
Brexit confirmed, we've ascended
>tfw Bisping won't even defend the belt
>>68142704
I keep the money
>>68144738
As someone who has been studying ancient Rome for 15 years I'd really love to deliver hammerfists to your face until you stopped breathing.
>>68145004
>good guy
>cockhold
>>68144859
people who dgaf about technique think wmma is great because the talent is so bad it usually devolves to scraps / brawls
but on the whole its pretty pathetic
>>68142827
yes
>>68144804
Michael's family fought off those IRA terrorists, he spilt his blood to keep Ireland British. He will be knighted by King Charles out of respect to Queen's health, he's literally too nice.
>>68145076
Well it definitely isn't Michael 'Spit on your cornermen' Bisping
>>68142989
>>I'm 23, don't feel like an adult yet
Have some fucking dignity. In a lot of cultures you've been a man for a decade, in other for 5 years, but in no culture are you still a child. Just grow up and start acting like a man.
(Getting rid of things like snap backs and T-shirts with bands and logos. And you're too old to use a skateboard for transportation, so give that up, too.)
>>68145056
cause i overturned your imaginary stormfront narrative?
>>68144636
![UFC.199.PPV.Rockhold.vs.Bisping.2.720p.HDTV.x264-FMN.mp4_snapshot_02.48.55_[2016.06.05_22.34.40].png](https://i.imgur.com/OiJWSoq.png "UFC.199.PPV.Rockhold.vs.Bisping.2.720p.HDTV.x264-FMN.mp4_snapshot_02.48.55_[2016.06.05_22.34.40].png")
>>68144890
>>68145043
doesn't really matter in this case desu
he's been grinding so long and always been a bridesmaid
he'll be on top of the world no matter what happens
>>68145076
>posting tumblr pepes
>>68144989
nah you shiteating mandrama casual, your faggot containment board is perfect for you alone. back to >>>/asp/
I clearly remember people saying GSP couldn't be at 200 because USADA has to test you randomly for 3 months and disclose those results on their website. We all know Brock is natty, but wtf.
>>68145078
>people who dgaf about technique think wmma is great because the talent is so bad it usually devolves to scraps / brawls
exactly it mostly looks like cat fights. Women were not built for fighting, or strength, or endurance
http://suppversity.blogspot.com/2012/06/strength-training-aint-for-women-one.html
>>68145040
>it took england over 16 years to get their first ufc champ
l-m-a-o
>>68145036
wow I've never visited their board before, but it's like they took every tripfag there was and gave the a forum, that must be annoying as fuck.
>>68145216
>aquafresh's only hope for championship gold is stefan struve
>>68145252
Man, it'd be nice to discuss things with people that don't constantly shitpost for attention but I'm way too used to anonymity and the general atmosphere of 4chan
>>68145152
I'm sure if I went to /asp/, your homeboard, I'd read more spergy posts like yours. I don't even know what you want to achieve at this point. From the first reply you've been doing nothing but sperging out, do you want the final word in chump? Okay I'll be the bigger man here cause you surely won't.
No matter what you'll still always be a 189er. You can whine about "serious fans" all you want, but someone who started watching MMA cause of Brock in 2010 is more of a fan than you, cause you joined the Mcgregor nut wagon.
You probably have no friends.
>>68145172
You have to give notice to USADA to become an active fighter (after retirement) but they don't publish that. Chael explained it on Helwani's show.
>>68145172
Brock has known about his return at UFC 200 for months. It's in his WWE contract that he signed before wrestlemania.
>>68145216
the best part is he isn't even british
>>68145252
literally bruce jenner
>>68145216
You guys are going to have Overeem as a champ pretty soon too
>>68144545
>>implying bendo isn't handsome as fuck
he'd be a lot better-looking without that fucking mop.
>>68145252
those hormones are starting to help bruce out
>>68145129
>(Getting rid of things like snap backs and T-shirts with bands and logos. And you're too old to use a skateboard for transportation, so give that up, too.)
nigga I don't have any of these, my woredrope is mostly over expensive designer wear (that i get for cheap), I'm getting my masters in engineering. I said I don't feel like one is all.
>>68145216
>17 year trophy drought
anyone got the spicy bangers list?
in the mood to sit and watch some spice
"No touch? I'll touch you in a second, motherfucker!"
>>68145287
>>68145313
we've already had a champ ages ago and will soon have a 2nd
>>68145307
mfw
>>68145291
>with people that don't constantly shitpost for attention
People still do that here kangaroo
>>68145129
>and T-shirts with bands
fuck you
>>68145252
>>68145388
>>68145043
who gives a shit he's already done way above expectations, he was expected to lose all 4 of his last 4
>>68145216
yeah but it's also way more embarrassing that luke got legit ko'd by pillowfist bispbong
>>68145400
I know they do, that's my point.
I'd have left for Sherdog a long time ago if I hadn't seen posts where people disregard opinions because of a join date or people get banned for questioning whether a fighter might be on PEDs or not. Shit's ridiculous.
https://twitter.com/kaxmana
so ive been looking through holloways thick wife' twitter
Do all hawaiians act like negros?
>>68145379
if that had hit a hard part of Luke's head it would have broken Bisping's wrist
>>68145374
>>68145405
she popped up in a role on the last season of Banshee, playing some hardboiled fbi agent who also smokes crack
has like the typical banshee softcore sex scene in it
>>68145422
which is more amazing, the Bisping KO, or Cruz almost heeming Faber twice?
>>68145476
she's not thick she has implants
>>68145340
Ah, ok.
You sound like an actual man, my mistake.
Too used to the menchildren here.
>>68145422
Will California ever recover?
>>68145490
bisping ko
if cruz did heem faber that would top everything
>>68145476
>Rush
Did he lose a bet during GSP/BJ II?
>>68145476
Hawaii is one big trailer park with azns
>>68145476
>Do all hawaiians act like negros?
yes
watch some hawaiian street fight videos
>>68145418
I won money betting on him in the Dolloway and Leites fights. Granted I was sweating profusely cause he got stunned a couple of times in those fights. Him beating Anderson Silva wasn't a huge upset imo
>>68145476
Don't know if it goes for Hawaians too but the Islanders over here aren't far removed from the African immigrants in terms of crime and behaviour.
MICHAEL BISPING IS THE NATTY GOAT
GOD SAVE THE QUEEN
>>68145489
Oh believe me I seen it.
>>68144636
>>68144750
I love how you can see Goldberg excited and leaping out of his seat
>>68145379
spooky haunted ghost rockhold
>>68145368
>>68145292
>projection: the post
>>68145486
cheers pal
>>68145500
>thinking holloway can pay for implants with his ufc salary
lmao
>>68145486
+ Hendo/Lombard
>>68145540
yh shit myself in the Dolloway one and I sweat at one point Leites knocked Bisping out cold with an uppercut but held him up against the fence which stopped him collapsing so Bisping recovered
>>68145557
>john
FUCK
>>68142989
you become an adult when you start doing things you dont want to because "they need to be done". there is no magical age when you become an adult.
Bork is back
>>68145553
GOD SAVE THE QUEEN
>>68145648
and the mandramatics are crawling out of the woodwork at a record pace
>>68145661
is that a dude next to obama
