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You are currently reading a thread in /sp/ - Sports
England 425/8 (119.1 ov)
Sri Lanka
Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar
Ashadu an la ilaha ill Allah
Ashadu anna Muhammadan rasoolullah
Hayya'alas salah
La ilaha ill Allah
K E K
E
K
>>67906550
1st for angelo matthews having a cheeky tenner on a moeen ali hundred this morning
>>67906626
>implying i'm going to a shitty thread with some random literally who australian woman in the OP instead of based mo
Are Sri Lanka Poo Peeland's cricket rivals now?
cricket is gay
>>67906626
>>67906670
Inshallah brother. Based mo is killing it.
REAL OFFICIAL THREAD
>>67906553
>>67906553
>>67906553
>>67906553
Bored lads. Need that declaration so I can watch some comedy gold batting.
KEK
Herath is going to die of old age before getting his 300th scalp
>>67906716
Fuck off you autistic. Come back when you can score more than extras
>>67906743
He'll have to move into your home then
Which thread is official?
>>67906788
The one with based mo
>>67906906
t. British Pakistani
450
5
0
W A L L O P
A
L
L
O
P
NEW
>>67906553
Herath's century lads
how much do ashes tickets normally go for?
>>67906993
4 dollars
>>67906993
should be ~$30 for the next ashes, which is $25 in BSAD
Allah has truly smiled upon England today.
>>67907022
>LE UNIRONIC PANDERING LMAO
>>67907034
Rare flag
>>67907055
t. British Indian
F I N N
I
N
N
CRASH BANG
WALLOP
A
L
L
O
P
we're only up by 472
based boland
le chubby funny smile don't spin it alot but still a spin bowler man gets his 300th
>>67907201
>>67906743
>(You)
>getting reverse sweeped for 4 by Jimmy
Time to retire son.
HERATH
E
R
A
T
H
t-they're already dead
literally going to make 500
lmao
Sort of feel bad for SL desu
K E K
E
K
IT KEEPS HAPPENING
watching these sri lankans field today is like watching a retard trying to wank off a doorknob desu
>>67907296
Please watch our sport
In the same week there was a documentary about people who dress up in latex dog suits, and a primary school was in the news for refusing to use gender pronouns, based Moeen outscores all the infidels. If this isn't a clear sign I need to covert to Islam and start purging the west of degeneracy I don't know what is.
A L L A H
L
L
A
H
150
5
0
>Ali 150
ALLAHU ACKBAR
WALLOP
really is a bit of a joke that bangladesh aren't playing test cricket at all this year, they were the better side at home against south africa last year and are actually quite a talented team, they'd probs be more competitive here than sri lanka
really have to question the icc's handling of the game
I dedicate this 150 to Allah
>>67907449
Welcome brother
>>67907502
It's up to the boards, which is why the West Indies play so much test cricket despite being poo at it these days
>>67907449
>implying moeen needs anyone to aid his purging of our decadent western ideology
>>67907529
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etPpKuYYxvk
this is all you'll be eating in 20 years
>>67907545
may allah bless us with more bountiful ready-meal combinations in the near future
>>67907545
>implying I'm not already eating
>>67907589
Only if those combinations are halal
>not waiting for the 500
>>67907615
Inshallah brother Allah will not permit the kuffar to taint our ready-meals with their hedonistic meat killing ways
>>67907545
I'm torn between absolutely despising muslims and thinking that they're all a big bunch of loveable retards. This advert does more for the latter.
>Declaration finally
Time for spaghetti
moeen for 200
these digits confirm
>>67907646
>you
>not waiting for 500
REEEEEE
>>67907643
bit of both tbqh
you get the absolute fucktards in syria, bangladesh, afghanistan and pakistan, but there's plenty who are great blokes
even >we've got our own share of based muslims
>>67907670
Is Zampa also a muslim or does Khawaja just love groping some twink ass?
>>67907643
Like every problem with minorities, it's culture that's the problem. a few refuse to adapt to the culture of the place and are drains on society, refusing to speak the language and being led towards crazy religious views. it's the same everywhere, look at blacks in america and blacks in england. blacks in america didn't integrate for whatever reason, they have their own awful culture and appalling crime rates etc. over here their just normal people who are part of society. it's hit and miss with muslim people whether they view the society they moved to as something they want to be a part of, or something they hate but for some reason insist on being here
what a meme way to get out, embarrassing
JIMMY
I
M
M
Y
WOH JIMMEH JIMMEH
Wew
>the shitty of Lanka
Jimmy's figures in the series
11 wickets
51 runs
sri lanka 531 ao (145.5 overs)
chandimal 145*
silva 111
clouderson 3-101
broad-3-92
england 145 ao (45 overs)
cook 50
root 38
herath 6-42
pradeep 2-26
sri lanka 112-0
Krazykuckold is seething right now
Why is cricket so boring
>>67908077
fly over to england early Amir?
>>67908077
I will genuinely suck off your dog if anywhere near that prediction comes true
>>67908097
>2016
>being a wog
>>67907732
t. Adolf Hitler
>>67907732
>their
>>67908097
blease
>>67908147
unsure about how claiming race isn't an issue, it's simply the cultural background of a person and their willingness to adapt is racist or extreme
>>67908210
t. Goebbels
Are you a good person?
>>67908330
I'm up there m8
>>67908330
no, I'm a total shit
>>67908220
t. Cmon guys it's 2016 ffs
>>67908404
t. Erich von dem Bach-Zelewski
>>67908457
t. Hartley Shawcross
>>67908492
Hans-Friedrich Blunck
>>67908584
t. KrazyKrezja
>>67908613
t. Angry, obese, manlet, neckbeard, virgin loser bitter about your pathetic "life" and cope by writing disgusting vitriol in your sexist, racist, islamophobic hugbox with other literal human trash.
>>67908330
I'm ok
>>67907545
>pKuYYxvk
>Is that shepherd's pie? I can smell.
>>67908330
+i come across p friendly
+i'm generous
+not self centred in any way
-prone to jealousy
-prone to holding grudges
-bit of a loose canon/i get fucked up and do stupid shit
-find socialization unbearable unless there's alcohol/drugs involved
>>67908656
well that escalated quickly
>>67908726
t. softcock
>>67908656
t. statscunt
is graeme flower related to andy pollock?
Is Ben Stokes related to the Strokes?
>>67908766
>>67908763
>>67908785
t. reddit
Still at the game lads
Weather's gorgeous
>Sri Lanka Cricket
is slowbro related to his evolution slowking
>>67908714
Please watch our sport
Umpires confirmed for greasing the balls
>compshit
Why is this useless cunt still getting in the side?
>>67908330
Not really, pretty much this >>67908723
Looks out desu
fucking hell, how long did that take, it had clearly carried.
>>67908978
I don't know. I'm just getting into rugby. It is so much work learning a new sport, but I really like baseball. Is it easy to enjoy cricket? Can I go play a bit in the backyard with my wife's kid?
might just jerk my gherkin and go to bed lads
>>67909505
you could roger your todger instead lad
WOAH JIMMY JIMMY
Guessing we're gonna see another sub-par total from shit lanka here,
Is that shepherds pie I can smell?
don't understand what the tamil tigers are about lads
so they were the first suicide bombers but they aren't Muzzies?
>>67908330
bare feet on the seat on public transport?
slopes are fucking disgusting cunts.
what was the question again?
Getting sunburn out here lads
Great match
>>67907545
>commentator on TV doing a weak Bumble impression
couldn't they have just paid Bumble a fiver to do it?
>>67909900
how is it a great match its one sided as fuck
>>67909808
there was two racial groups on sri lanka that grew to fucking despise each other because of certain government policies, causing one to declare themselves as an independent state and sparking a civil war
I guess it's like how christians love to use car bombs on eachother in northern ireland
gonna fap then watch the playoff t b h
>>67909932
I guess as an english cricket fan it must be nice to be on the winning side of a blowout for once
>>67909932
because he's getting royally wankered
im so fucking depressed today jesus christ
Woakes has looked super dangerous so far, far better than he has done in his earlier tests
>>67909961
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2j57P07am4
Yeah it is
sri lanka getting a minnow like beat down
>>67910030
broad is a wanker but he bowls leg cutters that courtney walsh would be proud of
>>67910030
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EG4qL7qMXHQ
>Mathews in charge of reviewing
To be fair he may as well use it on himself since there's nobody else worthwhile coming out anymore.
>Shit Lanka
Been looking the wrong way for both of the last two wickets
i really don't see the point of any Asian team playing test cricket in England in fucking May
>>67910073
14 years ago
nice1 m9
>>67910118
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u1CMFxm5rhk
**trigger warning**
>>67910030
roasted AND toasted
>>67910101
Why? It's lovely here.
Ben Duckett on future England opener watch
Ben Duckett on better than Gayson Woy watch
>How do you want your career family?
>Just fuck my shit up family
>Got you family
>>67910155
i bet mj has a beautiful penis
>>67910101
there's no point as long as anderson is around, he can be poor away but he hoops it around so much early season here he will give you 1 test win for free, out of a 3 tests at most long series
>>67910171
>Division Two
>>67910155
Come back when your batsmen can score more than extras
poor mathews
>>67910210
KHAN'D
>12 months ago playing against England in the Ashes
>now playing against "Hung Hom Jaguars"
>>67910155
KEK
K E K
K E K
KEKEKEKEK
>bitchstow
I know it wasn't an edge but still he's gotta get good at keeping soon
>>67910318
>LE FUG LE MIGAEL GLARK
reminder he made many of the greatest scores of the last decade, while you shitpost on an anime image board at 2 AM
Innings victory, comrades?
>>67910260
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwrxs_xHSv8
>>67910435
They will bat again I reckon
>woakes
how has he gone from looking awful in all his past test matches to dangerous now? he's actually a couple of mphs slower than he has been in the past yet he's getting more bounce and later swing
>>67910435
no need to run the bowlers into the ground when time's on their side
I'd like to see Compton get another shot too, since this could be his last game
>>67910479
He took 9-36 like 3 days ago.
hey i've been out of the loop for awhile cuz IPL = off-season for me (cuz i only fuck with PROPER THE CRICKET thank you) and last /cric/ thread left me wondering.... is walkcunt still on suicide watch? pooicide watch? anything?
d-daniel are you out there zerogoosing it up? holly > ellyse master race BSAing it up like you know we do.
>>67910520
the point is he has to have changed something to suddenly get later swing and more bounce, which probably helped him get the 9 fer
>All out for less than 100
>>67910520
county tbf
>>67910455
>boasting about a series in which Steve Smith routinely got fucked over by English god-tier bowling
>haven't won an ashes away in 15 years
KEK
>>67910583
you can only hope to contain them when the stunning jimmy anderson is like 8/35 or something, and you know ben stokes is always a hop skip and a jump away from 8/19
and lol as i type this another wicket falls... 67-6? holy crap how is sri lanka THIS bad?
Blown out
Blown out like your mum
>>67910618
literally next time lad
HazleGOD and Starc will completely tear apart the english lineup
Holy shit, at this rate sri lanka could end the test series without scoring more than 120 in an innings
>>67910455
>smith gets a double hundred on a flat track
>barely scores 10 as soon as the ball moves slightly from side to side
WORLD CLASS LA
>>67910586
Against Daniel's very own Durham CCC though.
>>67910563
Obviously he realised he wasn't up to test match standards and had to change something.
>>67910629
or wait shit was it stuart broad who was 8/19 in the ashes last year? i'm obviously a goddamn fool but messing up stokes/broad = i'm a bigger goddamn fool than i thought
ah well at least the aussies will remember the 8/19 part
>>67910648
As I said yesterday you've been saying this for years and it hasn't happened. there's a generation of aussie cricketers who have played for 10+ years and retired with no ashes wins in england
Herath would be a 10 or 11 in another team. Goddamn Sri Lanka are shit right now
man, if only there were a timely and apropos reaction image from today's ENGvSL test cricket beatdown coverage that i could use to properly sum up my thoughts on what i'm witnessing right now..... hmmmm.
>literally thirding your average in 4 overs
Is Woakes, dare I say it, elite?
>>67910692
They said that at before the 2015 series:
>England won't be able to deal with Johnson, Marsh, Starc, Smith, Warner etc etc etc
Australia is shit at cricket now.
btw does anyone enforce the follow-on anymore? idk what could compel me to ask this, but i am curious here.
>>67910820
Difficult to drop him now, going to be interesting to see what they do when Stokes is fit
>>67910772
iirc he was 11 for sri lanka a couple of years ago
>>67910824
literally top of the rankings in tests and ODIs, along with being the ODI world champions lad
>>67910873
England and Aus do in the Ashes for the humiliation factor
>>67910820
he should play instead of finn desu
that batting line-up wew
>>67910873
england did it literally a week ago, you dumb fuck
>>67910873
Teams do it less because they don't want to bowl their bowlers into the ground, there's a lot of international cricket+meme t20 tournaments to play and they want to give them as much of a break as they can. england are probably the only team that can consistently do it because anderson and broad don't play any formats other than test matches
>>67910873
literally last game m8
Australia did it to England in the fiftth ashes test a year ago too. The 2001 calcutta test scared people off it though
>>67910896
Border used to do the complete opposite and spend days batting out a dead rubber just to grind England into the dust mentally
>>67910896
yeah i reckon they prolly try to avoid doing it nowadays cuz they wanna milk another day or 2 of gate $$$ and concessions and basically there's more $$$ in dragging out matches for as long as they can possibly go, even if they're essentially over on day 1/2.
>>67910889
No one cares about ODIs anymore lad
>>67910878
stokes is fat and overrated
>>67910921
wait what... england did the follow-on in the first test vs SL? miss a little miss a lot i spose
>>67910952
He's overrated, but I feel like he still deserves a spot in the side for those once in a year performances he pulls out of his ass. That stand he did with Bairstow in South Africa is a good example, along with his century in the 13/14 ashes
>>67910940
HEY.... only ~3 more years til the next ODI world cup.... the world will once again come together and pretend to care about ODIs cuz "hey at least they're not T20"
speaking of T20, i know IPL is done so i reckon big bash is also over with so all the stars can go play real cricket in its natural/proper form, right?
Officially sunburnt lads
My face hurts
sl a shit
west indies a shit
south africa a shit even though this yet to be fully realized
nz pretty shit
hope pakistan are competitive this summer otherwise test cricket is pretty dead
>>67911033
yep
the only reason this series is happening is because England and Sri Lanka don't participate in the IPL
>>67910952
Over-rated sure but he's a match winner and pulls big scores/cheeky 5fers out of nowhere every now and then. inconsistent as hell though and will disapear for games at a time. if he gets a couple more big scores though his average is gonna get closer to 40 and his bowling average is going to drop a lot he has improved hugely as a bowler
>>67911066
NZ are okay, West Indies and South Africa could be mid to high tier again if they had better governance
Banglel are improving too, believe it or not
>>67911033
The t20 blast final is at edgbaston on August 20th. It's always a top day out tbf.
>>67911066
>west indies a shit
yeah well uhhh i'll see you that and raise you a world boss century in 20 overs or less!
>>67911066
People are too stupid nowadays to appreciate test cricket, its demise is inevitable.
Like men against kids.
>>67911117
oh sure i figure the final/championship/etc matchup is always a proper and spirited match, fully enjoyable even if you're one of those "T20 is an abomination of of cricket" people
however, in the end T20 is like the proverbial frosting on the cake of cricket.... and i reckon a few ppl in here know what you feel like after you've just downed a whole tub of frosting cuz "why not?" aka "it seemed like the thing to do"
>>67911125
Niggerslog is not cricket, Jermaine.
>>67911167
HEY! dontchaknow that nowadays they're doing NIGHT TESTS with PINK BALLS and stuff? test cricket is going to be fine as it proudly marches forth into the 30th century as the #1 form of longform sport in the history of the multiverse!
>>67911042
english sun"""sense""" never stops amusing me
I remember I was at the WACA for the 07 Ashes, and it must have been 36 C or some shit but all the poms were taking their shirts off and refusing any sunscreen offered to them because they wanted a tan
probably died of skin cancer the next day tbqh
>>67911204
i'm pretty sure i once saw a 24oz can of "high gravity malt liquor" called "niggerslog" at a ghetto liquor store.
I really hope there's another Mahela or Sanga in the SL domestic system waiting to be unearthed. This is just depressing
>>67911248
I was sat outside at the pub with my gf a couple of weeks ago for like 3 hours and got sunburned on my neck from sub 20 degree heat sun, don't blame us it's just who we are
Do you think there's an advantage to being a manlet batsman? You get hit above the pad so the umpire incorrectly assumes it's going over the stumps
btw i also just wanna inform the rest of the world that we're only ~1 generation away from getting 0.01% of our big strong ghetto negros into cricket so we can start going around the world and dominating the game because we're america and this is what we do.
consider yourself ON NOTICE, world. USA cricket is coming for that ass.... and we've even got a few pajeets locked and loaded just to make sure that destiny is duly manifested.
>>67911395
PLEASE
>>67911344
I know a lot of guys used youth pads in the 90s and early 00s for that reason
Getting hit on the knee roll used to never be given out back then
>>67911395
It's like you've learned nothing from the Windies. The modern day nigger doesn't care about tests, they'd much rather meme slog it and sexually harass female reporters with "muh dick".
>>67911344
here in america one baseball team once employed a strategic midget just to pinch hit him in certain situations where his miniscule strike zone (from knees to midsection) = almost impossible to pitch to and therefore it was an easy walk-for-a-pinch-runner.
>>67911495
But that's baseball, which isn't a real sport
>>67911431
THAT'S RIGHT! you'd better get used to saying "please" "thank you" and "may i please have another?" cuz once we unleash cricket-lebron on the world y'all are going to bow down b4 american cricket hegemony!
>>67911475
shhh i'm busy daydreaming about the glory of cricket-lebron and all these facts and obvious statements are going to kill my buzz here.
>Moeen will get knighted in your lifetime
>>67911536
right, i'm just saying that a similar concept to what you offered up had been used in cricket's little disowned deformed/retarded cousin that is baseball
>>67911495
Basically altuve
>>67911248
I've made my shirt into a cap to keep the sun off. I look like a mong but it's helping
>>67911583
More rounders or softball isn't it?
But yeah, manlets are useful. Just watch the Worcs - Warks game from last night.
>>67911595
I hope you've got the earpiece in so you can tell when Atherton takes the piss out of your crap hat.
My first test game, oh boy. Those sexy white uniforms.
>Woakes bowling on the literal bouncy castle known as Perth
bit scared now lads
>>67911589
yeah lol a few weeks ago when sunday night baseball was doing an astros game ESPN had their "anything but token" female announcer jessica mendoza do a walk-n-talk segment with altuve and she was literally towering over the poor little guy while pointing out that he likes to claim he's 5'4" instead of 5'5" so he can literally stake his claim to being king of the manlets.
it was just some kind of unintentionally-hilarious television given the whole "when will they ever learn?" meme that we've observed here
>>67911678
Well you missed basically the whole thing
>>67911684
Aniki
his hair doesn't look that different with it desu
>>67911709
best boy next door
>>67911705
Oh well, gotta wake up earlier then.
>>67911684
How about we settle this here in the ring if you're so tough?
>>67911678
Picked a shit test lad, wait for the Eng - Paki ones later in the summer
>>67911738
>>67911678
>>67911705
don't worry, sri lanka can still win this match if they catch the golden snitch. IIRC it's worth 750 runs in test cricket
>>67911661
It's alright, there are weirder people nearby. There's a girl behind me who is so loud and retarded I'm struggling to not to tell her to fuck off.
The game is getting a bit slow and dull.
>>67911750
those will be shit too
Pakistan are literally Misbah/Younis/Amir: the team
>>67911805
Yeah but both sides are at home
>>67911799
>telling girls that they're retarded
you are 4chan, anon. do us proud!
>>67911799
tell her she's a solid 6 but you'd give her a fuck out of pity
>>67911799
also holy shit how did i miss this?
>The game is getting a bit slow and dull.
[this transcends any sort of witty retort]
>inb4 "hey amerilard learn 2 sarcasm!"
>Bumble picking up women in the crowd over their headsets
>>67911933
top kek
i don't know what's more LOLworthy.... that sri lanka is currently 79-6 or that they've only mustered ~12 runs since the last wicket fell ~45mins ago.
Did that really hit the toe?
>>67911990
Apparently
>third umpire bants
>>67911933
She was replying like if he could have heard her too. P adorable tbqh.
>25mins left til stumps
if sri lanka gets on a roll they might manage 3-4 more runs b4 the day is done!
You think he can throw the ball with his beard?
>>67912117
do not insult moeen he is Mohammed's (PBUH) chosen man to lead the english kuffar to paradise inshallah
>>67912117
Definitely could catch it
>>67912150
How is implying beard strength an insult?
>>67912178
His strength comes from Allah some such as you are unfit to speak of him
>>67912150
for some reason, I don't think he would feel insulted
Finally, something happened
7 overs remaining, can definitely be all out by the end of the day.
>>67912719
>you
this is the last over
Is Stuart Broad elite?
>>67912774
So it is
>>67911840
I actually did. She asked me if I believed in evolution and I pretended to be a crazy fundamental Christian. She shut up for a while
Both me and my flatmate are moving out next week, he's been a cunt all year and broken stuff of mine, keeps on saying he will buy me new stuff but never has done, as well as being a dick in general. just taken his 100 quid headphones, do 2 wrongs make a right?
melinda farrell would get it up the arris
sexy, big strong englishmen dominating
