So I'm bored and I've got a fun idea here. Post anything and everything you want in this thread and I will record a dramatic reading of it [or an impression/accent/stereotype if requested and I can perform it well enough] and post it here.
Got another thread in /r/ for it but it's not seeing much action.
el bumpo
Ooh, this looks fun!
Here's my first one, a random news story from 2013 ( photo attached ) :
The Russian prison service said Monday it had caught a cat being used as a courier to smuggle banned cell phones and chargers into a prison camp in the country's remote far north.
The prison service in the Komi region said on its website that the cat was detained Friday evening as it climbed the fence of the region's Number One corrective labour camp with two cell phones, batteries and chargers strapped to its back using tape.
It posted a photograph of the black-and-white cat held up by the scruff of its neck by a guard with the bulky package still stuck to its fur.
"They have foiled various attempts to smuggle banned objects into Prison Colony Number One before, but in the case of the cat, the prison colony is at a loss: nothing like this has happened in the prison's history," the regional prison service said.
Read it in your best reporter voice !
>>22615821
Oh god I am going to enjoy this so much.
>>22615824
My pleasure
And after that I have another one for you. Try not to be a reporter on this one
The missus came home steaming drunk last night.
"You up for some role play action, babe?" she asked with a wink.
"Not really," I replied.
"Oh, come on," she said. "We can act out ANY scene, from ANY film you want."
Walking over to her with a huge smile on my face, I noticed her expression change. She had realised her mistake, however it was too late. Where I had previously seen arousal in her eyes, I now saw only blind terror...
As I shouted, "THIS... IS... SPARTA!" and kicked her down the stairs.
>>22615833
Sorry if it's taking a while, practicing a good voice to do this with haha
>>22615856
No problem mate.
Hey, if you post something I'll try as well. Make it a contest
>>22615821
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1tQPpv9JfnE
Sorry, didn't do this one as well as I wanted to, but I hope it's alright. Couldn't perfect a good American or British newscaster so I went for an Aussie. Excuse the terrible puns at the end.
>>22615851
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1Avcmza034G
This one was so much more fun, I think you'll like this.
Haha, I so can't compete. Well done
>>22615909
Thanks dude! Any more funny stuff you wanna hear feel free to post. I can do quite a few different kinds of accents.
Here's another one then ( I have no idea where I get these from ) :
"Sounds like the name of a mad scientist," said Buster casually.
"I AM NOT MAD!" cried Zarkendorf, his eyes bulging madly. "For years people like you laughed at my name! They called me a nerd — they said I should get out of my mother's basement and get a life! I swore that one day I would make them all pay! The world will soon tremble at the name Heinrich Dorfmenstein Zarkendorf!"
"Yeah — probably at the thought of having to spell it."
>>22615951
http://vocaroo.com/i/s13DMAXhqkbR
Oh god doing a German accent was fun.
Last one I can do for the moment, gotta be at a lecture for an hour or so.
bumping this because I'm back from uni
feel like joining in, someone give me some shit to read out
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0mu87lwrJH0
>>22616557
Quality reading good sir.
I've had an idea. Let's get some anons to write us a script, and we'll record each of our lines and turn it into one big reading?
