Listen to me very very carefully. I have lost all drive, motivation, direction, or ambition. I wake up and fall asleep in a miasmatic haze of drugs. I am in a constant cycle of caffeine, alcohol, and THC, self-medicating and self-intoxicating in a vain attempt to make the pain go away. I browse 4chan and reddit and facebook and wikipedia and news sites and little blogs and other fora looking, seeking, hoping, begging for something, something valuable, something real, something to give me the vaguest, foggiest notion of what to do or where to go. I make and share and consume meme after meme, new memes, old memes, forced memes, dead memes, anything at all to fill in the space. To disguise the nothingness of what goes on. But there is nothing, no catharsis nor panacea for this sickness, this utter paralytic disease of the mind. My *soul itself* is rotten and decaying, and I do not longer wish it convalescence. It is undeserving. Today I woke sober for the first time in three months, and I've finally found the truth. That there is no reason, no ultimate knowledge, no final, unifying salubrious idea that will finally bring me peace. I have accepted my death and I pray to any God that might listen to pity me and understand that although I have failed I have tried.
>>3966892
nice quints
>>3966890
/serious
I know there's copypastas and pretend copypastas going around but this feels serious. Are you OK OP?
>>3966890
So ... what do you want us to do?
try turning off the computer faggot
>>3966933
I already have, thanks for the advice friend
I apologize for the disruption
Go to church this weekend, any church you like, or at least get out of the house get some fresh air and meet new people.
>>3966890
How can we help you? Do you want dank memes? To be quite honest (tbh) I would suggest you checking yourself into drug and alcohol rehabilitation. I've been there, it sucks. They can help you though. Drugs and alcohol really can make you lose your mind if you abuse them hard enough. Before you make any big decisions, GET SOBER
>>3966933
>I counted your 3's
>>3966937
r9k is a sad place
s4s is a nice place
Lets be nice to OP
/serious
OP I went through a period a few years ago where I had very severe anxiety and was failing out of college and basically withdrew myself from all outside contact for about a year. I turned to pot as well, which helped make sitting alone in my bedroom browsing 4chan and reddit for hours on end somehow not boring. I then got myself addicted to my dad's pain pills, which was hell because I don't even like opiates. This went on until one day, an old friend I literally ignored for years texts me and just wants to chat. I start feeling guilty as hell and contemplated telling him everything, while also wishing I was dead, much like you. It really woke me up.
You got to reintroduce yourself to the outside world. Its hard. My parents were supportive and let me take time off from university to get better. I still browse the internet regularly, and even toke once in a while, but what I took out is there are actual, real people out there, and the reality you see on the internet is deliberately false and poisons you. So to beat this I found something real to be passionate about. A hobby other than browsing the internet for 12 hours a day.
Dank Memes isn't a life, its a sarcastic, post-ironic, meta joke that most people on [s4s] are in on. Your life has value in what you can do to transform yourself. Please explore your possibilities. Don't die OP.
>>3966890
I used to think s4s was a safehaven for when you want to get away from all the people whining about their slightly less than perfect lives to an ocean of people who don't care if you live or die.
I was always told to suck it up, and that I didn't know what real pain was until I went through something serious. REAL traumatizing shit that would give me an actual reason to be sad instead of just sitting around feeling sorry for myself because "depression" is a pass to be any pathetic way you want these days, it seems. To this day, I am striving for more trauma, more, more so I can finally feel like a human, and people like you are taking your ability to do that without paying anything for granted and complaining on fucking 4chan about your life.
While you sit around and think, "oh, poor me", I am actively putting myself in life threatening, traumatizing situations in an attempt to feel a quarter of what you've convinced yourself that you can feel for free. I've been so close to killing needlessly just for this. Hell, when I was a younger kid, aka a year ago, I witnessed my dog attack other animals and humans before I was the one to volunteer to kill it for free rather than spending money on something so easy and meaningless. It was jumping on me and wagging its tail not a minute before I was burying its corpse in the desert. I felt nothing from this, because I knew that I needed it more than I've ever needed anything in my life before. The first step in becoming what I deserve to be.
Your fortune: （ ´_ゝ`）ﾌｰﾝ
>>3966981
>I was always told to suck it up, and that I didn't know what real pain was until I went through something serious.
Living in panic mode from anxiety takes away any rational perspective one might have that shows what real suffering is like. But it still hurts like fuck, and what I think makes it all worse is like you said, it isn't real. You are getting yourself worked up on internet culture and being incapable of disengaging from it, and feel like you are unworthy because there are starving kids and shit. You feel like a failure because you are the only one stopping you from being happy. Starving kids and putting yourself in danger - those are all rational fears one can get used to. When its irrational fear of yourself, thats something that does not just get better by comparing situations like you just did. The internet has shown us enough desensitizing shit that we become so selfish to think the only reason to feel pain is we are empty inside. Fill that void with something real OP.
If you can't stop doing drugs and browsing the internet, just do drugs and do IRL for a change. We do drugs to numb us to the inane situations we find ourselves in. If things don't change, then stop doing drugs. All the best OP
>>3966890
If you would like to experience a life changing event look around the googler for Jonathan Gray, dead men's secrets or whatever other PDF books by him you can get your hands on. Pray to Jesus and ask Him for help. Read the book(s). They are about geology and the true history of the world. These things have the power to alter your life forever. The truth about our existence is far more exciting and amazing than what we have been taught in skol. A real battle exists for your soul.
I've been in terrible spots like you are OP and there is a reason to live and a reason to wake up with peace and purpose, I promise.
>>3966890
>I pray to any God
lol god doesn't even exist you nerd
>>3967004
person you responded to
I do not feel like I'm a failure because I'm stopping myself from becoming happy. I'm not worked up on internet culture either. That wasn't what started this and it won't be what ends it. It was started in part by what I previously mentioned and by seeing and acknowledging others in pain while I knew nothing. What did any of us do to deserve the lives that others apparently were not worthy of? I spread my story and message every once in a while, not in an attention grabbing way, but in response to things; in the way that shows people the point of view I was and am growing up with so that they can see that other people are suffering much more, as I constantly remind myself of. I don't mean this in the way that I think my story or life is suffering, because it isn't and I still don't know pain, if we're going by what I think. I mean it in the way that that traumatized veteran or that starving child would likely kill for any of our lives at any moment and we are selfish to not acknowledge this.
And let me tell you this:
while starving and mortal danger are rational fears, you will never really get used to them unless every single day is spent bearing such situations, especially during childhood.
All I'm trying to say is that while you can say depression and anxiety are painful, who are we to say that they are worse than things such as post traumatic stress disorder?
>>3966890
who is this qt
>>3967028
That wasn't what I do not just for Jonathan Gray but for the dead men's secrets or die. I have failed and I know what I would like is to be a failure because "depression" is what we find ourselves in. If things shown what started this weekend, any God that I would give me take time in skol. be real OP. I knew nothing. What did I see in any moment and basically withdrew myself of. I am not one to acknowledge this.
And let me tell you and I've been so easy to consume meme after meme, new people. How can you make sitting alone in an actual reason to fill in a constant cycle of drugs? All I'm a while, but what to transform yourself. Please explore as your life has value in terrible spots like a nice to feel like a vain attempt to feel like you can we to think makes it up, and wikipedia and to think s4s is this on something so selfish to them hard enough. Before you stop yourself from becoming happy, I'm blessing you that it not longer wish it sucks.
All the best, Mr Markov Chain.
>>3967304
blease resbond
>>3966890
op
just
do
it
>>3966890
BE FRICKIN HAPPY, guys. LOVE ONESELF. wholly and TRULY. the grueling seas, of life, mans plight, right, across the seas, sweeping, please, we see, the golden message of the youth, the truth, sream til blue in face, rat race, total disgrace, stable-bait.
https://archive.org/details/The_Direct_Line
earl nightingale was a brilliant man. a supremely insightful man. a man of ideas, he transmitted them to the world in clear-cut talks of intense truth, and varied perspective. truly a work for, throughout, between, and all-up-in the ages. earl was there. and is there. to guide. to steer, to lead, to encourage. forevermore. we bow to him, but only occasionally,.. only occasionally...
reminder to this thread!!!!!!!
plz keep irony levels as high as possible!!!!!!
Epic post, I liked it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HgOYbQ72cHM
>>3966981
>>3967028
I think people may think I'm OP when the real OP is actually dead.
Your fortune: You will meet a dark handsome stranger
