I was feeling awful about loosing my only shut in friend to the outside world, being lonely on NY and disappointing my parents...
Then I fucked my fleshlight while listening to succubus audio about riding my cock until my mind went fuzzy and I blew a massive load.
Now I feel all better about everything, other than my sticky dick I'll wash off in the sink.
Why don't you get one, robots?
>>25389622
What if mommy finds it :(
Because I'm not an idiot who buys overpriced sex toys
because we have hands for that, roasties use toys cause they dont have 8inch long fingers
I'm American voting for the first time. Who will protect the robotic interests best?
Sanders, Trump isn't good for anybody but suicidal or rich people.
Sanders expands the social safety net, leaving you free to pursue your weeb activities on a subsidized budget.
Trump makes you go out and get a job.
I'm voting for whoever the Libertarian candidate is. It looks like it'll be golden ganja Gary Johnson again or it could be John McAfee. Rand Paul is the best Republican and since I'm registered I'll be voting for him in the primary. The best Democrat was Jim Webb but he dropped out so fuck them all in the butt.
WHOEVER POSTS IN THIS THREAD DOES NOFAP IN 2016
The rules:
- no edging
- no looking at porn
- sex is allowed (handjobs too if it's not your hand)
GET READY TO MAKE 2016 A PRODUCTIVE YEAR
Get ahead boys.
>>25367159
Let's do this. So begins a new era.
Have fun literally cucking yourself
>sex is allowed (handjobs too if it's not your hand)
Why even bother when normies are just going to win?
>try to do something different for New Years
>get wine
>3/4th into the 1.5L bottle by myself
>not feeling anything
Did I get memed? Usually I'm buzzed by my third beer but I feel completely sober right now
Go get 2 40s of steel reserve
>>25399001
wine is for pussies , go drink some hard liquor
wine is a pretty slow drunk
Why don't all the lonely misanthropic male shut-ins on /r9k/ just date all the lonely misanthropic female shut-ins on Tumblr?
>>25398246
>Mutual loneliness = compatibility
spoken like someone who doesn't understand loneliness! you sound like normalscum and i think you should leave
>2 people that hate everyone else will definitely love someone from a place they especially hate
sounds brilliant
same reason why we don't just date the lonely grills over at /cgl/, which is a lot closer to home
they're all fucking insane, degenerate tumblrsluts
Hey robots don't forget to let the love and peace flow through you this new year <3
I love all you robots
<3 love you all
fuck you and kill yourself faggot
In the end olwe all die. All of our emotions - dead. Our memories - dead. Those who remember us will eventually die as well. What's the point of even trying if in the end we all die?
I'm a 7/10 so physically attractive but am a social cripple. I feel no empathy. I don't understand people. Why the fuck have I been so cursed? I attract girls with my looks but scare them away because of my retarded clueless behavior. I want to die
I'm 7/10 and I function fine socially, but I'm NEET so I don't know anybody and I don't do anything.
There's no reason to have empathy. People who are ostensibly worthy of feels would assuredly shit in your cheerios and laugh at your corpse if it got them $10 and a bump in social upgrade.
Humans are selfish pricks. Save your emotions and energy for yourself and spend it only on yourself.
>>25398021
Lack of feelings is not a curse, it's a blessing, you edgy fucking cuck. Choke on your tears to death.
MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE
>>25397909
WILL THE REAL SLIM SHADY PLEASE FUCK OFF
>>25397909
rip marshall ;_;
CUZ I AM
Is 2013 when the internet and 4chan went to shit?
I WANT MY OLD INTERNET BACK
>>25397819
Try 2007, newfag
>>25397819
It went to shir when the normies discovered it.
When it stopped being a nerd thing to do.
>>25397871
Very much this senpai desu
>see psychiatrist
>she asks me if I believe in therapy
>say no
>she says there is nothing she can do for me
>tfw you have to be religious to get help
>>25397526
>Don't believe in therapy
>Go to psychiatrist
What did you think would happen you great nit?
>>25397526
why did u go to the psychiatrist
she's pretty retarded for even saying that. isn't therapy meant to help you believe in therapy?
>discover I have a chronic illness
>actually feel better about myself because I am reassured I wasn't lying about my problems the whole time
>new meds
>unironic sucidal thoughts and impluses
>can't bring myself to eat
>lost 15 pounds in about 3 weeks
help me robots
i look almost exactly like pic related
do robots like skelly girls
yeah, i usually buy the leaner meats for my roast beef sandwiches
going to need to see a timestamped pic of your spooky bones
>>25397464
What chronic illness do you have?
who here /can't be loud/?
my voice is really deep and it just feels weird to yell. what does this mean?
>>25397411
Post vocaroo of voice
>>25397552
wat do i say
>>25397569
"Hi, my name is _____ and I have autism."
Which one is /r9k/?
>>25397366
tl;dr faggotte
>Far Right
>National Socialist
Fuckin what m8
What fucking autist would take their time to make this
ITT:your first porn wank ever
>>25397358
Who can actually remember this?
>>25397385
Never fucking reply to me again unless you're contributing to the thread. Bitch.
>>25397419
sage
also poinles text that means nothing but lets me past the filter
>Be Torah-ob servant Jew
>Go to the Touro College in my city (colleges intended for orthodox jews primarily)
>There is a new histoy professor, a cute red head woman, probably in her late 20s, dresses in the modest attire of a Torah-observant Jewish woman
>Whenever she says good bye to one of her students (my friend, black dude born in Brazil, adopted by Israeli parents) she has an inflection in her voice that she is really attracted to him, cucking me in...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
nvm, I shouldnt because Ive posted my face on here and i will be identified.
>>25397335
So what. She probably gives your friend good grades too for it. She is already unprofessional by fucking one of her students.
>>25397322
Do it. I suggest speaking to the others in the college about this, maybe they can assemble a posse to stone her to death.
Seriously though, post her facebook. Also, if you can secretly record your friend admitting it and maybe get him to tell some details that proves it was the truth (describing distinctive features such as scars or moles, describing the inside of her house, etc.) then you can take it to the college.