Anon, what happened last night? I think I drank too much
I poured apple juice up your ass when you passed out, sorry senpai
>>25410360
>last night
>april 29
found the austrailian
>>25410400
Kek
Not an original message
Sometimes I want to temporarily transform into a beautiful girl and then seduce my friends one by one and get lovingly fucked by all of them, none of them having a clue who I am.
Is this common at all?
That is called homosexuality. It's common.
>>25410364
This comment has closed the thread.
>>25410364
How can it be gay if I imagine myself as a female?
>ask a girl what kind of music she's into
>"oh, just about anything on the radio, really"
>>25410312
Stop trying to force Drake as a meme you fuck
>>25410312
That's actually a good thing as it shows she isnt pretentious.
What's the problem? If you're waiting to meet a clone of your self then you'll end up alone.
>live with Mom at 23 in a small 1 bedroom apartment (I sleep in the living room)
>Mom hasn't left the house the entirety of her 3 week long winter break from work
>can't fucking masturbate anywhere in privacy
>new job starts soon
>will finally have enough money to live on my own without a roommate
>tfw I can finally fap
>15 days till I get my first...
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Not recommending masturbation, but why don't you do it in the shower, you dolt?
Why not just fuck your mom?
>>25410330
Cause I want to jack off to porn and I hate shower faps.
Why does everyone have a problem with c u ck porn? It's fucking great.
Walk into a room, fuck a girl while their pathetic other half is watching. Sex and power combined. It's awesome. Wait a second, have you fuckers been doing the other way round?
>>25410210
>>25410210
Fuck off schlomo merchant
>>25410210
This. I always self-insert as the bull instead of the cuck. It was a shocking revelation to me when I realized most guys with a cuck fetish get off to the humiliation aspect.
I have a problem with porn in general, since i can't suspend disbelief and know they are getting paid for this.
Who /liftingasanewyearsresolution here?
Gonna be buff af by summer
>>25410179
Hahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhhahahahahahahahahahshahahshhaha
You got it bro
Do cross fit m8, don't be like those roid monkeys
WHY CAN'T I HAVE A GF
I WAN'T A GF NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW
I'M A GOOD GUY
>>25410124
WON SOMETINS GOT TO GIVE
Tell me OP how many girls did you ask out in 2015?
>if its less than 10 that's why you're alone.
>>25410124
Nobody has a gf, dumbass. Gfs are just a fictional plot device, they don't exist outside of Hollywood.
>out with my Mom for Brunch
>waiting to cross the street
>suddenly swarmed by a TCU sorority, all whores caked in make-up wearing leggings
>say "excuse you" in a normal voice
>"vicious"
>"what did he say?"
>"ugh he said excuse you", in the most nasally sarcastic voice ever
>Mom says "so...
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>>25410035
excuse you is a pretty passive-aggressive barb man. if you're gonna dark side swing for the fences, just haul off and holler "MOVE SLUTS" while doing your best marky mark impression and shoving them out of the way violently while you walk past in a hurry
sorority fucking shits
>>25410035
haha /pol/ is not real life faggot, everyone thinks you're a weirdo loser in the real world
Your mom was probably a college whore like them. You are probably the product of her college whoredom. Good work, OP. You roasted the roasties. Keep it up. Become snarkier, stronger, more brash.
There's this shitty app called iFunny and the only reason I have it is for the people I subscribe to. But the featured posts are absolute balls. They feature any pepe of any kind to try and appeal to "meme lords". It's almost as if they want to be robots instead of the superior normie master race. Pic not related.
>superior normie master race
fuck off failed normie
>>25409958
Agreed. Normie OP should commit seppuku, REEEEEEEEEEE!
Guess I have to kill myself now
What did Earl mean by this?
Probably that some genius outcast is gonna create a weapon to destroy humanity as revenge for their treatment. Like large scale Eliot or CHM.
Something like that Billy Talent song River Below
normies are responsible for school shootings
dude i'm depressed lol
dude XANNIES LOL
>"WOMEN ARE SOOO SHALLOW! ALL WHAT WOMEN CARE ABOUT IS LOOKS! EVEN UGLY FAT GIRLS CAN GET BFS!!!"
When will this meme end? MEN are the REAL shallow ones. Watch these.
Fat guy tinder date:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=iUy3_kBme4M
Not a single girl left.
Fat girl tinder date:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2alnVIj1Jf8
ALL of them left except for one guy.
Do you really still think women are shallow?
So if a guy turned up and was 6 inches shorter than he said he was then the girls wouldn't all leave? Yeah right, girls are just as shallow.
scripted as fuck
>All of the girls direct snarky comments at him
>The guys flat out tell her
The women are equally unlikely to start a relationship with the fatty, the guys are just more honest about it.
>tfw you came inside your practice gf
How fucked am I?
Not only are fucked, but you just doomed another future robot into existence.
>>25409524
better learn to love her now :^)
>>25409524
isn't that the point of a practice gf?
It's scary how nowadays, impressionable young people can fall victims to indoctrination from neo-cults like SJWs, redpillers, transfaggots and the lot of them so easily through the Internet. What kind of fucked up generation will this be.
>>25409492
I think most people have more "traditional" values (not conservative but not what you're talking about). Maybe young people will learn to better recognize crazy people wand won;t be influenced by them in adulthood when they have real power.
Maybe things will be better.
>>25409492
haha, idiot children also fall for the conservative boomertard #trump memes. we're fucked in either direction (and you're probably one of them)
>>25409492
>little miss trouble maker
Damn right she's a little troublemaker.
Ruining their parents dreams of having a NORMAL child.
>Have job interview in local police station
>Two women officers (around 30-35) sit near me
Hear them say shit like:
>"I left my husband for him, but I realise now he's too young and immature."
Other policewoman responds
>"But I bet the sex is good"
*laughing*
>"Yeah for a 20 year old. He's sooo muscular as well"
These people are meant to be a respected authority.
>>25409403
What, you expected high moral conduct? From fucking cops? I'm rolling in laughter.
You do know that cops are the worst of the worst, right? Not even memeing. The majority of cops are retards who barely graduated high school and have a lust for some feeling of power over people.
>>25409403
cops are usually dicks because they feel validated by their peers and family, and they deal with angry homeless drunks who scream at them all day so they eventually slip into the mindset "i am right. my job is hard. they don't understand" which is basically teenage angst, except in a 40 year old man.
With which drug can you compare the feel to be in love?
Is it like Opium?
Can i get this feel with any gf, or any person in general.
>>25409369
cocaine you dummy.
Molly. Definitely molly.
MDMA is the ONLY correct answer
>>25409385
Ur a retard