Well /r9k/ I did my part in making America better.
>Be me working at pizza hut
>8 year old kid comes in with his mom
>Moms asks what kind of pizza he wants
>He tells her the one with the cheese in the crust with peporini
>The mom attempts to order it
>Me not wanting this kid to grow up to become another fat American I tell the mom we dont do the cheese in the crust anymore and the only...
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>>27379552
Huge dick move dude.
Ruined that kids night.
Shame on you.
>>27379552
good going
>>27379552
I'm pretty sure that's irl moralfagging.
>tfw the get a sports car meme worked
>tfw gf
>tfw your relationship's success is predicated entirely on your economic value
>>27379348
What car was it?
>>27379429
It's probably the one in the picture anon
>tfw can't watch porn because seeing a girl fuck another guy/suck a dick/whatever makes me feel like a cuck
It just makes me angry.
>>27379337
I know that feel. Watch lesbian porn.
>>27379378
I'd rather not watch porn at all, it gave me ED for a while so I have stopped watching entirely. But anytime I see a sex act posted somewhere on here, I just feel angry and cucked. Like, I can't even understand it anymore. It feels like you'd have to have a voyeur/cuck fetish to get off to any porn in my eyes.
>>27379337
>tfw disgusted at tattoos
>every porn star has tattoos
Well I think my life is over.
So I am a 26 years old robot. I actually got close to a girl once, close enough to have sex almost!
However, she saw my penis and said "What is that?". This was when I realized something was wrong about me physically and the doctor diagnosed me with phimosis. Basically, my foreskin was so long and tight it looked like a tiny floppy hose dangling from the end of my penis and that was when it was erect, when flaccid its even worse. I do not have a particularly small penis (I think 5,5" or so which is not huge but not...
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>>27379174
Damn son, your penis is small and mangled.
Just drop the gf stuff altogether and fuck prostitutes.
Also TD;DR
>>27379174
oh no.
>doing any kind of circumcision ever
you can fix it by yourself im sorry man.
sue your doctor
you had a tiny ass dick either way
I HAD ICE CREAM WITH CHOCOLATE SAUCE FOR DESSERT
hi bunnyposter i'm glad you're back and safe
don't be a stranger now yuh hear?
I had bunny poon.
HI BUNNYPOSTER!!!
HAHAHA ROASTIES ACTUALLY BELIEVE THIS
>>27305340
But that's the truth.
Wich part are you disagreing on
All the vaginas I've seen with beef strips look blown the fuck out and really loose. Just generally very off putting. I'd reject a girl for having a roastie.
innies > arbys
>>27305340
It's 100% true. Go pick up a copy of Gray's anatomy. The book, not the DVDs
>inb4 Jew media etc
I did not ask to be born. That is a fact.
No doubt if life turned out better, I would not be lamenting this.
>26 y/o
>kissless, hugless, handholdless and obviously fuckless virgin
>acne
>yellow teeth
>balding
>several mental illness with frequent panic attacks
>I have 0 (zero) friends
>I'm afraid of everyone...
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You are always free to kill yourself. As long as you decide not to, your life can't be that bad.
>>27378918
/thread
potato skins force down throat
>>27378693
>posting Lain with an OP that indicates your obsession with nonessential details of your life
Shamefurr
You're not like Lain at all
Remember when she found out how her entire family, and the life that came along with it, was a lie?
It's time for a survey, robots.
1.) How often do you bathe?
2.) Do you take baths or showers?
3.) What tools do you use? (ex. washcloth, loofah, bare hands)
4.) Do you use body wash or bar soap?
5.) Which body parts do you wash? How do you wash them, and in what order?
6.) Do you have any unusual or abnormal bathing rituals?
inb4 >bathing
Usually every other day
Shower
Hands
I use both
I wash my entire body by putting soap over it
I like to sit in the shower after I'm done bathing for around 20 minutes just to think about life
1) Once every 2-3 days
2)Mostly showers
3)Entire bare hands, sometimes a washcloth for back
4)Body wash
5)Usually everything except for my back legs and butt. Wash my dick last
6) Take a shit and work out before I go to the shower
>>27378506
>1.) How often do you bathe?
once a day
>2.) Do you take baths or showers?
showers
>3.) What tools do you use? (ex. washcloth, loofah, bare hands)
nothing. i just stand there for 5 minutes and waste watter. occasionally i'll exfoliate my face or shampoo my hair. despite this my bo is alright
>4.) Do you use body wash or bar soap?
body wash if at all
>5.)...
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If you support Bernie Sanders then you are a male feminist. Prove me wrong.
>>27378486
What is that quote about?
/x/ warned me abot this
>>27378535
It says on the picture
>>27378538
About what?
Let's have a thread about times we had sex.
>be 16
>nice summer evening
>over at friend's house
>dad has a video project and sets up bed sheet movie screen in backyard
>tons of kids from around the block show up for movie night
>me and friend carry out lazy-boy recliners because we're cool
>set up at the back of the group, but away from...
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>>27305166
>we're actually, silently fighting over who gets to put it in
>let her do it
>she grunts
>it's crazy tight
>I can only fit the head and maybe an inch of shaft
>she just waits
>after a moment she looks back impatient and mouths the words "come on"
>what?...
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>>27305166
>>27305176
didn't read any of it, fuck off to /soc/ /b/ or wherever you came from
hopefully your shitty thread 404's
>>27305166
Things that never happened the thread
Original
>drowning in $57k medical debt from when i was unemployed and got hit at crosswalk by uninsured driver
>meet with bankruptcy attorney
>"You make too much in your new job, Anon. Your debt isn't that bad. Pay it off as you go."
>oh ok
mfw
U S A N U S
S A N U S
A N U S
muricafags btfo by shitty healthcare system. id have just told the medics to leave me there dying in the street.
>>27378351
They will take you against your will and if you don't comply they will call the police. I'm not even joking, it happened to my brother.
I am nothing.
I am nobody.
iktf anon
keep trying your hardest, it's all we can do
Same. I'll die an absolute nobody.
Maybe we'll get reincarnated in better circumstances.
I don't know how I feel about this feel when I feel it
When I'm nobody, I wish I was somebody. And when I'm somebody, I wish I was nobody. The grass is always greener.
>Being a manlet is just a meme
explain this then normie tallfags
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZbG05ePWRQE&feature=youtu.be&t=313
>>27378199
It is obvious women are insanely shallow. This isn't news. The people who will listen already know and those who won't you are wasting your time.
This is impossible to be an effective troll or bait.
>>27378199
>tfw 5'9
BOW TO ME, YOUR MANLET KING!
>>27378199
How tall are you? I'm sorry that you have to be a manlet. Though look at it from the bright side: evertime a manlet thread comes up it makes me feel better about myself.
I'm beginning to doubt everything /r9k/ has taught me and i don't like it.
Women can't all be bad.
good, go out there and confirm it for yourself. see you in a month.
>>27305029
Go talk to women then, nothing stopping you. I'll keep your seat warm for when you come running back.
You don't actually take robots seriously do you? That's one retarded step above taking /pol/ seriously
who else here lives through fiction?
I don't even have a life anymore, escapism and sleep is all I do
Fiction > 3d human life
Sleep is all I do. and listen to music, that's it.
I'm literally becoming a meme.
I'm a disgusting neet who watches anime.