WHY exactly is not having a job and living with your parents such a dealbraker for cunts?
Golddigger much? lmao
>>29356491
would you want to pay for everything every time you wanted to do anything with a "cunt"? they don't either. pull your weight, deadbeat
>talk to a qt from Tinder for a couple of days
>she asks me if i live alone
>i respond "no"
>unmatched
>>29356551
I have money from my parents, bitch. If I want to take a cunt out, I can just ask them for 50 bucks or whatever. mom also lets me borrow her car
>be Femanon
>cute guy pays me 100$ for sex
>I would have sex with this guy anyway so it was easy money for me
>he couldn't stay hard the whole time
>my head got tired and I didn't feel like sucking his dick anymore, so I quit.
>we eventually gave up and he didn't even cum
I can't even have sex for a living and live on easy mode. I'm not good at anything.
Yup that happens it's not a meme.
>>29356436
That's right honey.
You lost the game at character select.
Also you just lost the Game.
>>29356510
>tfw you have to have work skills to have a career as a whore too
>senior year of high school
>be in a clique with 3 other friends
>loner kid sits with us at lunch regularly
>he invites us to his 18th birthday party
>all of us go
>we're the only guests except his mom, younger sister, grandparents, and his aunt
>table set up of soda, cake and cookies
>we sit around for about 20 minutes drinking soda
>get up, flip the cake/soda/snack table over, and all of us throw our sodas in the kids face
>tell him we never liked him and laugh at him
>look at the horrified, sad, and angry faces on his family members
>all of us run out of the house and continue laughing about what just happened
>still occasionally think about it and laugh
>>29356374
please tell me this didn't happen
>>29356374
plot twist
>OP was the boy that got bullied
>>29356442
It's a true story. I'm not in touch with any of the other people though.
You walk into a bar and this guy slaps your gf's ass.
Wat do?
>>29356371
Ingest a lethal dose of morphine.
>>29356371
Give him directions back to Whoville
Tell him sweet dreams as I pop a round into his chest. Pic related
I'm going on a date with a girl tonight (first date with her)
She lives in the city where we are going
Is it possible to get laid tonight?
How do I do it?
wear acqua di gio. that stuff is liquid panty remover.
>>29356298
You gotta woo her hard man, hit all the bases.
If you're not an autist you'll know if you're getting any by the end of the night.
>>29356323
I have calvin clein and boss
close enough?
Hey robots, I've been awake for over 30 hours and feel no different. Is this normal and when should I expect to crash?
>>29356297
>Hey robots, I've been awake for over 30 hours and feel no different.
liar
>>29356297
GET TO A HOSPITAL NOW. Not being affected by staying awake for long periods of time is a sign of serious mental illness. You are likely in a state where you could do harm to yourself or others.
>>29356328
Not shitting you, I've had dazes and sleepy spells but right now I feel normal
>Made video of my cat
>Set it to Mortal Kombat music
>It'll probably get 100 views, but I uploaded it anyway because I'm not about that normie shit.
If you don't make a music video of your pet, you're a fucking normie.
Robot life for real.
Vid Related:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wTRlkFX8Ss
I am actually stoned enough to enjoy that, thank you
Cats are beautiful
This is honestly the best content on this board right now.
should i go for surgery ?
What for?! There's nothing wrong with you, Honest. And no. I am not trolling or even lying.
>>29356760
my lower jaw is small, maybe its just me idk
Pick your chin up lad
I recently started dating a guy I met at college. We had sex recently, and he didn't make me cum. That is expected because it took a year for my ex to reach that point. But this guy is already really close. After he left I wanted to use my toy to finish the job, but I realized that he might count it as cheating! My toy is a exact copy of my ex's dick(pic related). Its amazing how quickly I can cum with it, and that makes me really want to use it. What should I do?
Bring it up with him and ask it is ok?
Throw it away and never tell him?
Or am I...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
Made me chuckle.
7/10 bait
ask to make a copy of his dick and use that instead
>>29356138
Why not just buy a different dildo to use? I didn't know people even used novelty dildos.
Remember this meme?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eRCNeBjrFuc
>>29356084
STOPSTOPSTOP STOP
*tips fedora*
*wipes sweat*
*runs to bathroom and vomits*
THIS ONES FOR YOU
maybe my favorite video of all time
>>29356129
Truly the greatest mirror of our age.
but what is the song?
Are you sexist /r9k/?
Come take this test: https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/Study?tid=-1
It will reveal your inherent biases
We already had a thread on this the other day, stop copying you faggot.
>>29356045
Wow I actually visit /r9k/ all the fucking time and I didn't see it
oh well
>>29356016
>harvard
nice liberal agenda you got there
Daily reminder that looks and confidence is all that matters.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cfpo-z8kMzw
>>29356004
make everyone blind, fag, then maybe you stand a chance
Pick up videos are dumb.
Guys in desperate of girls don't want random girls on the street. They want their cute classmate, friend, roommate, or co-worker. Rejection is a big deal when you're still going to be seeing that person almost everyday for 1-3 years.
>>29356004
>Everyday I am slowly losing my sanity and I will probably break and become like melon pan
>Soon I will no longer give a shit
How did you guys make your meme pages go viral?
Just be yourseIf to bee honest
>>29356002
pay a pack of pakis five dollars to spam it around
>>29356002
got added on to an already mildly popular page and posted good content
Took these a few hours ago. Long line at the grocery store.
>>29355891
I wish I lived in a city just so I could ride a bike around at night being comfy
>>29355912
Oregon was much more comfy for me to bike in than D.C.
Roast Me /r9k/ i want to kill myself so badly should i ?
plz, and quietly
>>29355879
You have a very handsome face, if you lost a little more weight and worked out(also got contacts), you would be a 9/10 maybe 10/10.
No, you should fight back against life and try to be happy.