Dear /pol/, white female here. Just taking the day off work to garden. (admin thinks I'm sick) :^)
Anywhooo, i was busy tending to my asparagus when I became enthralled with the size and thickness of them all (greens pictured).
the rain had to fall just right, and the genetic makeup of the seeds produced from the parent (these were wildly sewn from a nearby asparagus fern two falls ago) must have been perfect that year.
I had all but fallen into a catatonic vegetable state from sheer awe. I was flanked on all sides by these huge intimidating green rods.
Then I saw it. The stalk which put all others to shame. A dark rich pole which stood firm and commanded the very winds to break and soil to rupture for it's headway.
At first I thought the green asparagus that came before it were sagging under their own weight; seeing the purple passion standing proudly erect however made me realize all other stalks were simply bowing to it's superior prowess.
My mouth watered and fingers twitched as I grasped the long dark thick stalk with a trembling hand.
I cut it low as I could and tossed it in the basket with the others: it's massive frame becoming even more apparent mixed in with it's scrawnier cousins.
The taste was beyond anything I could have hoped for: smooth, bold, silken, as if I were guzzling cup after cup of heavy wipping cream; while the green brothers put on quite displa of power, their taste left a bitter note in the back of my throat.
>>72243693
>anywhoo
Bin this fucking thread. Retarded cunt identified
guys we gotta stop meming so hard
>>72244130
....
Umm, what part of "white female here" didn't you understand?
>He's just maad cause his stalk is thin and green.
>>72243693
I bet your piss smells vile
Where the fuck are mods when we need them? this is /b/ tier shit. Get the fuck off /pol/ cunt.
Also, tits of gtfo because of /b/
I chuckled gently. Also tits now or go fuck yourself.
reminder that you're not a real man unless you have a 8"+ dick.
>inb4 chodefags
>>72243693
Asparagus is great, but I don't have space for it in my current garden. What else are you growing?
>>72244325
>If I say white female again maybe he will believe me
>>72243693
Tell us about your relationship with your father.
>Dear /pol/, white female here.
People are actually falling for this.
>>72243693
How can green asparagus even compete?!
>>72243693
lol the fuck is the point of this thread, pretty amusing anyway OP 5/10
>>72243693
>Green asparagus
>Not white
ReEEeeeeEEeeeEE
>comparing asparagus to dicks
>>72243693
This is the best, most high effort asparagus-based cuckpost I have ever seen.
Bravo OP! Bravo!
How can Green Martians even compete?
>>72243693
>white female here
new pasta ? this is high quality cuckpost
8/10 if new new pasta
tits or get the fuck out, your probably some baiting whale or trap lady anyway.
>>72244992
It makes the piss smell better when she sucks it.
>>72243693
>take ripe asparagus
>surprised when it tastes better than the unripe ones
women, everyone
lel do u any of you agriculturefags can halp me with this nutrient defficiency ?? iron maybe ???
>>72243693
You write like an asshole. Cut out the fluff and try writing succinctly, you faggot.
>>72243693
The cuck posting has gone so far we are now talking about asparagus. I think I need a break from memes
>>72243693
You grow your own asparagus but you dont even know when you harvest it? Why bother even doing it then if you dont learn when to harvest.
>>72245289
Too much water, too much sun, not enough sun, not enough nitrogen, it can be any of these and more my friend.
Post Pic of garden
>>72243693
tl;dr
>women always think about cocks
>women think they can troll
>>72245289
Add uranium lol
>>72243693
Cool blog post. So glad you could put it on /pol/
>>72245289
yellow is nitrogen deficiency
>>72245600
oh, yeah, this guys got it.
>>72245001
I agree. OP was glorious today.
Insert in butt and post picture
>>72243693
Tits or GTFO
>>72243693
I bet your farts were diabolical.
nice blog
>Cuckposting has come to this
>>72243693
nice thread OP
>>72243693
blacked/10
>>72244510
My gf asked how big my dick was and I lied and said I never measured it. I asked her to guess.
>umm lol idk 9 inches xD?
Truth be told, I'm like 5". Women don't know fuck all about measurements. They just know when they get fucked good and cum.
In short (pun), this survey is retarded.
>>72243693
I can't tell the difference in taste, but that shit always makes my pee smell bad.
And baby, if the dick's too small, just put it in a smaller hole and get a vibrator, I mean gee whiz.
I've known plenty of women who were slaves to whichever man had the biggest dick, and it never worked out well for them.
After every orgasm, you still have the rest of your life to live. Don't let sex control you. You need to get control over sex.
>t. real femanon who knows OP is a male.
>>72243693
>I'm a grill
Tits or GTFO
6', 178lbs 33 yo white male here.
Been in long term relationship with what was gf, now wife for 17 years.
Im a grower, my penis is about 2" soft, 6 1/2" when errect, no real width.
When we fuck she cums 98% of the time with 90% of orgasms from penetration alone.
Penetration with 6 to 6 1/2" can push an orgasm. I couldnt care less if you believe me.
It depends on alot of things, everyone is different. But it does happen.
>>72243693
>words
wanna fuck bby?
