> Be me
> Live in the south
> Go into guitar center to get a cord for my amp
> 250 kid playing an off tempo pantera riff at max volume
> Black kid playing drums
> Mall cop confuses it with gunshot
> shoots black kid
> Protesters use amps to make power electronics
FUCKING GUITAR CENTER
>guy standing around handing out his demo CD
>go home and put it in my PC
>it's a virus
>250 kid
> Go to guitar Center
> 5 employees immediately ask me if I need help
> Tell one i'm looking for some pedals to get a Johnny Marr sound
> "Oh Yeah, I love the Sniffs! Let's go see what our pedal guy would recommend."
> Walks me over to another room, the walls and floor are completely covered with pedals
> guy sitting in a bean bag chair in the middle with pedals taped to his body
> "Hey Jim, this guy is looking to get a Stiffs guitar sound, what do you recommend for him?
> Gives me a rusty key that seems to have been put in an oven because it's fucking burning hot
> Too autistic to say anything
> Cashier rings me up and says "Have a nice day and good luck with the spliffs music!"
> Walk out with tears in my eyes from the scalding burns from the key
FUCKING GUITAR CENTER
>>66470183
>> Gives me a rusty key that seems to have been put in an oven because it's fucking burning hot
I wasn't ready for this
>>66470183
greaat thread
>>66470043
>live in the south
>go outside during summer
Pick 1
>>66470043
the last time i went to guitar center, there were about 15 employees there and only one person knew how to string a guitar
what are the requirements for working there, honestly
>be in guitar center
>someone asks me if I need help
>never go into guitar center ever again
Goddamn I just want get new gear not hounded by idiots who know absolutely nothing
>>66471114
The beauty of commission based stores.
>>66470043
>walk into guitar center
>male employees faint, female employees give knowing smirk
>grab handful of plectrums and shove them in mouth
>spit plectrums 30 feet onto wall of tellycasters
>flawless stairway to heaven rings throughout the store
>store manager burns location down because there will never be a greater day in The Guitar Center
>walk into Guitar Center
>"Do you have any patch cables?"
>"wats that"
:)
>>66471114
>"I'm good, thanks."
that's all it takes you autist
when will grimes start calling us fire ants spicy boys ??
>>66470101
is this a mr. robot reference?
In other news I've never had a problem with Sam Ash
>>66470043
>go to guitar center
>no guitars
>look around and see the guitars have been replaced his big beefy black prison inmates
>it was a trap
>suddenly i feel something long hard an black rub against my asshole
> fug
>suddenly am bumrushed by black men
>cock in all my holes
FUCKING GUITAR CENTER
>>66471114
"no"
>>66470043
>Be me
>Live in Canada
>Visit only guitar center in Ontario
>Looking for a new cord for my amp
>Thick smell of maple syrup
>Something is up
>Examine the amp cords
>They're all covered in maple syrup
>Turn around
>Hear gruff, panting noises coming from staff room
>Open the door
>See lumberjack fucking a black kid, using maple syrup as lube
>Notices me
>I run out of the window
>"GET BACK HERE, BUDDY"
>Jump into car
>He axes his way into my car
>Spills maple syrup everywhere
>Everything is maple syrup
FUCKING GUITAR CENTER
>be me
>drive into guitar center on my rascal scooter
>staff members line up like the kids in the sound of music
>one by one they start singing a capella
>HEY
>BEEN TRYING
>TO MEET YOU
>OOHOOUHOOHOOUHOO
>HEY
>THERE MUST BE
>A DEVIL
>BETWEEN US
>OR WHORES IN MY HEAD
>WHORES AT THE DOOR
>WHORES IN MY BED
>BUT HEY
>choose the one girl working in there as our new bass player
>next album is shit
FUCKING GUITAR CENTER
>>66473098
that's not true anon you can't play Stairway in guitar stores
>>66473098
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xXlYt5JCrZw
>>66474102
>black person in Canada
fake
>>66470043
>be me
>live out in bumfuck nowhere
>go into guitar center for a new guitar
>find a nice black Fender
>ask if it's for sale
>it is
>but only if I can piss 15 feet straight up into the air without getting wet and fire projectile feces out of my mouth and my ass at the same time
>find out this is actually a military facility and I'm about to become a new biological weapon
>guitar center CEO turns out to be Dr. Eggman and laughs as he wanks while I'm forced to breed this black blob of woman who screams "MAH BOOOOOY" with every thrust
FUCKING GUITAR CENTER
I literally went into guitar center for the 2nd time in my life yesterday and this happened:
>walk into acoustic guitar humidified room
>one other guy just browsing
>we eventually start playing around on various guitars
>he apparently finds "the one" and sits down
>starts tuning it into really awkward unnecessary tunings
>starts a "metal riff" (on acoustic guitar)
>at this point I still didn't care
>he starts mumble-spokenwording
>for like 2 minutes he's throwing phrases out like "we will burn down and rape the motherland" type cringe stuff
>I realize at this point I hadn't really looked at him
>look at him
>he's wearing a trilby
>I could have avoided this
>>66474559
why the fuck are they singing Hey
fuck you anon I wasn't ready for this
