ellow Pitchfork patricians, it is once again the time for our nightly countdown for Pitchfork's 5 new reviews to be updated on the site at 1am eastern time.
10.0?
0.0?
Best New Music?
Best New Reissue?
8.0+ with no BNM?
A shitty set of 7's and below?
Weird Al’s eternal BNM incoming hypetrain!
Noctourniquetcourtsney Barnett Review?
Titus Andronicus being robbed once again?
Dead Sara
Ian FUCKIN' Cohen?
Ryan "THE TASTEMAKER" Dombal?
Lindsay "qt feminist" Zoladz? [retired patrician, memory lives on forever]
Jayson "8.7" Greene?
Larry "retired BNM godfather" Fitzmaurice?
Craig "Meme Rap" Jenkins?
Brandon “Meme Metal” Stosuy?
qt Kim "retired Meal Goddess now at Noisey" Kelly?
Grayson "Grizzly" Currin?
Brian "Backup" Howe?
Mark "the elder statesman" Richardson?
Evan "IS GARAGE ROCK DEAD" Minsker?
Meaghan “retired trap queen" Garvey?
Andy "secretly alpha" Beta?
Zoe "¡DALE!" Camp?
Philip "Electronic Wizard” Sherburne?
Stephen "M." Deusner?
Laura "Sun Kil Buffoon" Snapes?
Will someone dethrone Kanye West’s 30 out of 10 for AOTY?
OFFICIAL and accurate 2016 BNM Tally: 16
The most wonderful time of the night, every night, right now. Here it is, the nightly P4K thread. Time to get comfy.
>P4K Collection Rar (Over 300 deleted reviews, pics of every staff member, very badly needs to be updated)
https://mega.nz/#!zoQGBCYK!evBav1uwKekImmse6g35z2lRgdGXxxUh8nyVSTyShl0
>Tonight's Top Stories
-This thread stands with Kesha eternally
-How was your weekend?
-Good vibes to everyone who has finals this week, I’m right there with you.
-This thread hypes and supports DIIV, Beyoncé, Bat for Lashes, Car Seat Headrest, Islands, Vijay Iyer, Swans, and Tim Heidecker.
>mfw I forgot the didn't copy the f at the beginning of "fellow pitchfork patricians..."
Anyways, what's everyone listening to?
pic related
>This thread hypes and supports DIIV
underrated meme
>>64356059
The only meme more funny is that that one trip who has a tattoo of DIIVs logo, bet he regrets that now
Beyonce 9.2 screencap this
>>64356059
I can't wait for Dev's next 8.1 post
>>64356240
I'll root for anyhting that'll trigger /mu/
>>64356029
>ellow pitchfork patricians
it sounds like a Brit is saying hi to all of us
>>64356385
I like British accents, so I'll leave it from now on
>>64355961
Can we add Ryan Dombal to the OP?
I think he's made some valuable additions to p4k culture.
http://pitchfork.com/staff/ryan-dombal/albumreviews/
>>64356478
>Ryan "THE TASTEMAKER" Dombal?
>>64356478
are you fucking blind
>>64356478
is this a fresh new meme?
I wonder if they'll review lemonade
>>64356548
a little sour, slightly watery. the proper ratio is 1 part lemon 4 parts ade and two tablespoons of sugar. overall 6/10 would drink on an 90 degree day
>>64356605
Fuck dude that was just terrible. You meant well but please never post again.
>>64356548
Of course they will, they've had the review written since last week
>>64355961
that picture actually better than the whole album.
If Beyoncé gets a 10 I will drop my trip
>>64356605
too much sugar, fatty
>>64356662
suck my cock what are you going to do about it
Beyonce is getting a 9.3 and there's nothing you can do about it
>>64356688
Screened
>>64356707
I wont do anything, but you need to work on that for future posts. We're all expecting a lot from you.
>>64356240
>>64356711
way to 'Price is Right' me
>>64356779
Y'all ready for a beyonce 9.4
>>64356688
I really hope so, for your sake
>>64356765
kek ebin it goes it goes it goes haha long boy :^)
haha it's just a prank bro!
>>64356812
Don't bully Montie his favorite band hasn't been good in 20 years and his girlfriend looks like a horse
>>64356819
nice work, lots of improvment I think
>>64356854
oasis were never good, nevermind the last 20 years
>>64356854
my digits are Montie's cock size (centimeters)
>This thread hypes and supports DIIV, Beyoncé, Bat for Lashes, Car Seat Headrest, Islands, Vijay Iyer, Swans, and Tim Heidecker.
>Beyoncé
disgusting
>>64356896
wew lad
>>64356902
>implying that list in its entirety isnt disgusting
>>64356896
>>64355961
>not supporting and hyping the 6 god
you're still sleeping on him baka
>>64356936
Fuck you, Islands has a Unicorns member in it, that's a lifetime great pass
nice thread retards
>>64356936
bat for lashes does not deserve ur hate
>>64356996
The Unicorns made one album that was an 80 on release and sounds incredibly dated now. I dont know why Im surprised the guy who runs the Pitchfork thread has shit taste
>>64356936
CSH is good
>>64357126
Wow m8, sounds like you're gonna die in a planecrash
pretty bullshit for Lemonade to get a higher score than Beyoncé but that's how these things work. I'm guessing 9.1 but it could go higher
>>64357119
>>64357146
It doesn't have a song as annoying as 7/11 though, so it's got that going for it
>>64357163
No way Jay's dick is that dark. 2/10
>>64357138
Honestly, and there's no way to not come across as a massive hipster, they got a lot worse after signing to a major label. I really liked them before last year
>>64357163
If you're gonna go throught the effort to make that, why do such a shitty job with the font?
>>64357177
7/11 wasn't on the album. I agree it sucks ass though
>>64357146
I dunno, I barely remember anything about the s/t except that it put me to sleep. Lemonade is at least distinctive, I could imagine loving it if I cared about the narrative at all
>>64357178
my digits are Jay's cock size in centimeters
>>64357207
i only have GIMP on this pc the shortcuts are all fucked up
>>64357126
someone woke up thirsty on an island in the sea
>>64357187
Teens of Style was ok, the MBIKMB tracks sound fantastic, and everything so far from Teens of Denial is very strong as well. I wasn't huge on Drunk Drivers initially, but it's one of my fave CSH tracks now. I don't think you can really judge the quality of the band as of now of the rehashed work.
>>64357211
Lol, shows what I know, never listened to the S/T in full
>>64357126
sounds like you got a classic case of Jellybones
what releases (that haven't been announced yet) are you hoping for this year?
>>64356546
It can be if you believe hard enough
>>64357379
A new Unicorns album
>>64357126
sounds like you put another down payment on the oil in Iran
beyonce 9.6
you heard it here first.
>>64357126
sounds like you were lifting some weights but you didn't sweat
10/10 forthcoming
Dubs confirms
>>64357269
I've heard denial. its very good. just as good as his past work.
>>64357470
these dubs confrim a 8.9
Post your honest reaction image if at 1:03 the lemonade score is a big red 10
>>64357489
oh shit, those last 2 digits though
We are witnessing history
Objectively the most critically acclaimed album of the 2010s
>>64357126
sounds like got some heat from the fire but you still froze when you saw a ghost
>>64357126
someone has no pension plan
>>64357470
Fingers weren't crossed oops.
Here we go
>>64357504
>>64357504
>>64357126
someone dove into that freezing sea with a parasite attached to he
>>64357126
sounds like your memory is fucking unclear
It's not being posted until Saturday you fucks
>>64357590
get a load of this guy
There's no way this album is not getting a 10/10. 10 or more articles + BNT in less than 24 hours. TPAB didn't get a perfect score because of its few ""problematic"" lines, but now they have no reason not to give it a perfect score
>>64357590
That means they now publish on Saturday in addition to the other days of the week
I really doubt Beyonce gets reviewed tonight. we'll probably get Ferg.
What are the odds Lemonade doesn't get posted tonight? Or is it a sure thing
10/10 BNM
I KNEW IT I CALLED IT!
>>64357619
If Lemonade gets a higher score than TPAB I destroy my toothpaste squeezer
>>64357640
I heard a track off that Ferg album and it was wack as fuck. Something about lacking motivation or ambition lmao
>>64357504
>>64357649
it probably won't be posted tonight in all seriousness
>10/10
whaaaaat
Lemonade is boring af to listen through tho
>>64357665
THE ABSOLUTE MADMAN
Wow they actually gave it a 10. Holy fuck
they didn't post the beyonce review yet lads
Lemonade is gonna get a 10 and its gonna mark the death of Pitchfork as a credible source for indie music reviews
honestly, you guys are dumb if you think Lemonade is actually gonna get a 10.
8.6. Screencap this.
>>64357590
>>64357605
>>64357628
>>64357731
I told you fucks
lemonade 9.4
>>64357755
they didn't post shit yet lol
>>64357755
>being this new
p4k updates ~1:00 AM EDT
10/10 BNM
>>64356972
>filename
>>64357789
Oh lol
>>64357755
lurk moar genius
why is this album getting so much praise I have no idea what's going on. it's not even good. it sucks. and it has hardly anything to do with all this shit people are saying about it (i.e. What she was doing in her Super Bowl performance) or did I miss something?
>>64357816
thanks man, I worked hard on it
>>64357126
sounds like you think you write all the songs
>>64357126
sounds like you haven't seen the world or kissed all the pretty girls
>>64357854
Made me giggle. Thanks.
>>64357846
It's not a great album, most of the reaction to it is just generic post release hypeing/shitposting, this will not be the next TPAB or Black Messiah, it is however a reasonably listenable album despite what a lot of people are saying. She's got a strong voice, and the album is relatively eclectic style wise, the production is generally acceptable, more of a big mehh from me
dubs jus cuz i can
>>64357846
She's famous so there's rating inflation.
Anyone else remember Destiny's Child? FUCK I'm old
IF NO BNM
WE RIOT
>>64357126
sounds like you want to buy some matching clothes
10.0 incoming
>>64357145
>>64357362
>>64357459
>>64357537
>>64357584
>>64357854
Not Noko doesn't give a signal fuck
if this gets a 10 I'm going to become a skinhead desuu
If Lemonade doesn't get at least a 9.6 there will be a race war
>>64357918
lol yah
https://youtu.be/3lIhvRmF7oI?t=1m2s
9.4 BNM
>>64357935
Sending those signals, sending those signals, sending those signals, those digital signals
>>64357935
its hard to find people who give signal fucks
Does /mu/ really fall for all that 'OMG Queen Bey, so brave and empowered, revolutionary' bulllshit or is it all ironic shit posting?
>>64357918
i remember them and also this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aASCZgbJxC8
>>64357974
lol is browsing mu your job?
>>64357895
>most of the reaction to it is just generic post release hypeing/shitposting, t
That's what I thought at first because of course this board's persecution complex leads them to believe that any black artist that talks about social justice is going to get a 10 but it's more than that. The album has a 94 on metacritic with 11 reviews in.
>>64356056
https://youtu.be/kO_vKrVxGJM
>>64357935
If you don't think WWCOHWWG is one of the greatest pop albums of this century then me and my nigga No Noko will run up on you when you sleeping
>>64358005
I'm twelve levels of irony deep, I don't know what I think
>>64357126
sounds like you weren't born a unicorn
>>64357918
"Jumpin', Jumpin'" is a stone cold jam
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vjw92oUduEM
>>64356704
I want triggered diabetics to LEAVE
So what are we listening to as we wait for the inevitable 10/10 to drop?
I think lemonade is very good but not sure I like it at much as her last album. It's kind of all over the place, but most songs are well produced and her voice sounds great.
Most of the threads about this album are very negative. After the initial backlash when pitchfork gives lemonade a 9+ this board is going to start liking the album because it has been made acceptable to by p4k. It's going to be kind of embarrassing. I can only imagine if fantano gave it a high review
>>64358031
I wish, my actual job consists of me staring at matlab for 12 hours and preteding like I understand it
>>64358035
I was actually interested by the metacritic score, I assume popitism and early inflation, it'll probably go down to an 88 or so
>>64356056
listening to laughing stock by talk talk right now, TNT by tortoise earlier. I reallyyyyy vibed with tnt honestly.
I was 100% sure TPAB would get a 10, so I doubt this will. It may be close though
>>64356688
the only thing you should drop is your disgusting horse faced girlfriend
btw how's the wifi reception in that cuckshed?
>I'm a white person uncomfortable with the uncertain nature of racial conversations so I'm just going to extend my ignorance to my entire race and shoo shoo them into not talking about it either
>>64358090
TNT is great, you should listen to Sea and the Cake if you like Tortoise
>>64358124
I definitely will. TNT is the only Tortoise I've heard, is Millions Now Living as good? Better? Worse?
>>64358118
who are you quoting specifically?
>>64357126
sounds like you are going down in smoke and flames
Dead Sara - Pleasure To Meet You 8.3 BNM
>>64358072
Listening to The Impossible Kid. Love it.
>>64358142
I'd say equally good, Im sure there are people who will disagree
>>64357379
new burial ep
>>64358080
come on
matlab isn't that bad
I should know, I've used it for five minutes
RIP The Dissolve
>>64358005
>>64358005
there are some bleeding heart liberals on this board, this general particularly (I'm looking at you, Good Content Guy), so yes, people actually care about this
>>64358212
they weren't as good as their AV Club days desu
>>64358200
just fuck me up famalino
>>64358245
bleeding heart liberal is something my grandpa said, isnt there a more modern term you could use
>>64358301
""""cuck"""""" desu
>>64357126
sounds like bananas help you unwind
>>64358245
>implying
i'm liberal and think most of this Bey "empowerment" stuff is bullshit publicity stuff to keep her relevant and make her seem like a captial-A "Artist." she's not saying anything particularly insightful, revolutionary, or hasn't already been said for decades.
>>64355961
>150+ replies already
Beyonce really is queen...
>>64358322
now that's what I call meme politics, perfect anon
>>64358348
It was worse around the DG days
>>64358348
Yeah but half of those are Niko sending Unicorn lyrics to me
>>64356056
>>64358072
Seeing them the day after tomorrow, so stoked.
OKAY LADIES GET THOSE DUBS IN FORMATION
>>64358337
the politics are really in the visuals, not the music
>>64358407
sounds like you're ready to die
>>64358348
it's just /pol/-tards finding an easy opportunity to shitpost >muh cucks >muh librulls because a black woman released a slightly political, high-profile pop album
>>64358422
never heard of them but I hope its a good show
>>64358407
tell me about your moral resignation
>>64358269
o-okay
My experience is basically importing a bunch of excel data and making shitty graphs while messing around on /mu/
I wonder what beyonce did with that big "feminist" set piece now that her marketing team has her on the BLM meme.
I want it to have it on my backyard, ironically.
>>64358430
these dubs are for queen bee
>>64357126
sounds like you just turned the lights off
ARE YALL READY FOR
INTRODUCTORY PARAGRAPH ABOUT BEYONCE BEING BLACK
NEXT PARAGRAPH ABOUT BEYONCE BEING A WOMAN, AND HOW HER DISCOGRAPHY EXUDES WHAT IT MEANS TO BE A BLACK WOMAN
PARAGRAPH ABOUT WHAT IT MEANS TO BE A BLACK WOMAN TODAY AND WHY MEN CHEATING ON THEIR WIVES IS BECOMING MORE COMMON. THIS WILL INCLUDE HEAVY IMPLICATION THAT ALL (WHITE) MALES SHOULD BE ERADICATED.
PARAGRAPH ABOUT BEYONCES FILM AND HOW BLACK AND FEMALE AND BLACK IT IS.
THREE SENTENCES ABOUN THE MUSIC.
PARAGRAPH EXPLAINING WHY FORMATION IS THE SINGLE GREATEST SONG OF 2016.
HORRIBLY PRETENTIOUS CLOSING PARAGRAPH LADEN IN IMPLICATIONS AND MISGUIDED HIGH HORSED STATEMENTS ABOUT BLACK CULTURE AND FEMALE CULTURE AND HOW BLACK FEMALE CULTURE IS SUBLIME AND SUPREME TO ALL ELSE.
SCORE: MOTHERFUCKING 10
if dubs it's a Prince retrospective instead
>>64358515
guarantee the album won't even be reviewed tonight
>>64358547
close, though I just realized we might just get 4 Price reviews tonight
>>64358515
>THIS WILL INCLUDE HEAVY IMPLICATION THAT ALL (WHITE) MALES SHOULD BE ERADICATED.
this, no, of course, but the rest i can realistically see in the review.
hey guys, just got done having phone sex with Zoe.
Beyonce will NOT be reviewed tonight.
>>64358571
I feel like they would have done that yesterday
there is no way this isn't going to be at least a 9.0
>>64358591
>review
>consists of 3 sentences regarding the music
>>64358598
what are her favorite slang words for penis and for vagina?
>>64358610
They have to because Condé Nast is holding a gun to p4k's head
>>64358630
do you think she full on says cunt, or uses pussy?
>>64358160
One of these days, it'll happen friend
>>64358618
first day at pitchfork, kiddo?
>>64357126
sounds like you raced home, and got under our covers
>>64358630
>>64358650
she likes it when I call her pussy a "P'Zone"
and idk about penis, she doesn't like me talking about it.
the fact that mu of all places fell for the pol meme really shows how far this website has fallen
>>64358710
There's some obvious meat jokes there that I hope you used
1 0 / 1 0 B N M
0
/
1
0
B
N
M
>>64358798
4chan failed the moment people realized they could leave their containment boards
If dubs 10.0 no BNM
Lemonade 7.9 screencap this
I hear lyrics about infidelity and jay z and that drama and stuff about her relationship, but I see nothing at all political or anything about social or race issues
just five minutes until the first 10 since MBDTF. See you on the other side friends :')
>>64358833
0% chance
Julianna Barwick 8.3 low BNM incoming
i honestly thought that they were going to give TPAB a 10. pitchfork proved to me that they weren't cucked to that point yet. i still don't think they are. maybe if beyonce wasn't a manufactured pop star they would give it to her, but i feel like they still might give half a shit about their indie roots.
CHECKEM 10/10
lemonade won't be reviewed lol
>>64358877
double dubs confirm
>>64358869
delete this
>>64358842
it's a marketing strat
>>64358817
I wish you wouldn't leave your containment website desu
>>>/r/eddit
>>64358877
dub dubs confirms
>>64358888
fuuuuccckkkkkkkkkkkkkk
>>64358894
you're not using that meme right
>>64358877
check m8
>>64358903
ayy bby, you love me
>>64358842
Any album by a black artist is...
>to SJWs, a peak example of blackness and what it means to be black
>to /pol/, a call to eradicate the white race
It's meme politics not real politics
>>64358935
I do
:)
>>64358921
delete this
>>64358877
Dub dubs confirms
>>64358888
quads overrides dub dubs
won't be reviewed today
yeah beyonce's gay and all, but can we talk about what really matters? titus andronicus.
>>64358964
thanks for compiling this anon
BEYONCÉ 10.0 CONFIRMED!!!!!!!
/POL/ BTFO
/MU/ BTFO
WHITES BTFO
ALL HAIL QUEEN BEY
SLAYYYYYY B
where r the reviews lol
>10
>10
>10
>10
>>64358983
MARCEL BTFO
>1:02 ET
>>64358975
I hear they were robbed
can anyone confirm or deny this?
8.5. wtf
>>64358983
What are you even doing?
Jesus. you spaz.
>>64358964
the ghost of noko & sage is smiling up at us from hell right now ;_;7
>8.5
LUL
>8.5
FUCKING PANNED
>>64358984
They had to do server maintenance to prepare for the Beyonce traffic
>>64355961
beeeees ahhhhh
Lmao
They actually did it the absolute mad men 10/10 its ova for Hova
POPTIMISTS ON SUICIDE WATCH HAHAHAHAHA
8.5 BTFO
DEAD CAREER
>8.5
>.
>5
BLACK PEOPLE BTFO
TRUMP 2016
f u c k i n g w r e c k e d
8.5 btfo
black music is dead
PANNED 8.5 LMAO
Beyoncé is finished at this point
why doesn't the etta james album have a BNR tag
why is pitchfork so fucking bad at tagging BNRs
so p4k honestly thinks that Pablo is better than this?
PANNED THE FUCK OUT
KANYE REIGNS SUPREME
BEYONCE PANNED
BLACK WOMEN EVERYWHERE COMMITTING MASS SUICIDE
>8.5
>8.5
>8.5
>8.5
>8.5
NIGHTLY RUNDOWN
Beyoncé 8.5 BNM by Jilian Mapes
A$AP Ferg 7.3 by Kathy Iandoli
Cullen Omori 6.2 by Ian Cohen
Antwon 6.9 by Matthew Strauss
>On the “7/11”-style banger “Sorry,” she turns his side-chicks into memes, which will inevitably become “better call Becky with the good hair” sweatshirts that Beyoncé can sell for $60 a pop. Best revenge is your paper.
I cringed
Basically Pitchfork gave it BNM so as to not appear out of touch, but only gave it an 8.5 because the album actually isn't that good.
8.5 can't even beat memeye!
D E S T R O Y E D
E T H E R E D
YEEZY YEEZY WUS GOOD
After all that....a completely reasonable score.
ayyyy lmao
8.5
WHITES HAVE RISEN AGAIN
who the fuck is Jilian Mapes and why did she get to write such a big review?
>>64359020
JESUS CHRIST
is there a woman more cucked than beyonce?
First by Jay now P4K
>>64359059
this
if it didn't get BNM or got the 8.3/8.4 "complimentary BNM", they woulda got called racist by white teenagers on twitter. can't have that now.
Ferg got a 7.3, fair score. i liked that new record.
also yes, TLOP is better than Lemonade.
>Jillian Mapes
Pitchfork is about to get shat on for giving the review to a white girl
damn, i cant believe that fuckin panda bear album got a better score
Top lel
