File: ambient 1.jpg (49 KB, 500x500) Image search: [Google]

49 KB, 500x500

Yeah, the horrible truth about Ambient 1: Music for Airports, one that no one wants to talk about, is that it's pleasant, in the worst way possible. I mean, pleasant, the same way handjobs given from an inexperienced girl who has never seen the equipment or is unused to moving her hands in a certain way is pleasant, because its better than nothing. This is certainly a step above John Cage's "4'33" (oh, man, he did not go there) but why listen to Ambient 1: Music for Airports when you can listen to anything else at all is beyond me. Why settle for a clumsy handjob when you can have the world?

So because people think that Ambient 1: Music for Airports is the first ambient record, it has been romanticized to the moon and back (and nothing beats romance like the moon. That thing's been following the Earth since it formed and it's been too scared of rejection to get cozier and too scared of loneliness to leave). For those who've come to believe that this is the first ambient release--it's not! I mean his own Discreet Music, that little oddball that no one likes talking about, came three years before this. The only reason this one gets a little more attention is because that one wasn't named Ambient 0: Music for Hospitals, which is essentially what it was. And this one wouldn't even work in an airtport, which is normally so busy you wouldn't be able to hear ambient music, or else so dead that you'd rather listen to anything else. Another thing, have you seen these track titles? I mean, do you ever get together with your friends and say things like, "Man, do you like Brian Eno?" "Sure, I like Brian Eno." "What's your favorite Brian Eno song?" "Oh, I gotta say it's probably '1/1.'" "Really? I much prefer '1/2.'" You guys will sound absolutely nuts, I tell you.