What do I need to do in order to become an edgy tough true metalhead?
kill a cop
master of puppets
like everyone else
Kill ManBearPig, then rape his body and wear his skin.
>>49957582
learn to shred and go to guitar center and play master of puppets and really fast pentatonic solos.
also spend shit tons of money on merch, chains, boots, etc
>>49957582
go to a plastic surgeon and tell them to fill your head with molten fucking iron
>>49957582
accept that all music it's pure shit.
then listen to some Abruptum.
Listen to a bunch of Destruction, Slayer, Mutilator and BATLORD
>>49957793
>le metalhead stereotype
this is as far from reality as possible
>spend shit tons of money on merch, chains, boots, etc
nope me and my friends just where jeans and shirts nothing special nothing expensive you could literally buy the clothes at a thrift store for $10
>learn to shred and play master of puppets and really fast pentatonic solos.
i did but not necessary
>go to guitar center
not even once
Listen to edgy tough true metal. Duh
No, I mean, shouldn't I go live in a castle in the forest or eat a wolf's heart or something
>>49958357
are you saying you want to
>>49958507
That pic man
>>49958507
Well, don't you need to do a really hardcore foolhardy edgy thing to define you as a true metalhead?
>>49958728
fuck no
you dont have to commit some high profile crime to be considered a metalhead
contrary to popular beleaf not all metalheads burn churches
>>49957962
Look guys, here's the #1 authority in Metal. His word is the metal religion. He's the metal jesus come to spread the word of metal. Let's sniff his farts cause he's obviously the authority in metal.
>>49958810
im not trying to be some elitist fagot i'm simply giving you how me and my friends do it
metal isn't about being flashy of famous its just about the music and having fun
>>49958808
but shooting yourself in the head is a good start
>>49958728
>he never heard of the "Rite to true metalhood"
you obviously listen to some shitty fake stuff if you don't know how to become a "true metal Odin certified "TM
>>49958873
>music
>having fun
pick one
Watch K-ON!
>>49958980
Teach me, true metalord, teach me!
>>49957582
Kill yourself.
That's super edgy.
>>49957582
Destroy your vocal chords irremediably.
>>49959100
Well first child, you must travel to the land of Norway, there, you must seek the prophet himself, Varg™, he shall send you on a quest, usually that includes finding Dead's™ corpse and using one of his remains to open a teleport to hell itself, there you will probably have to travel with Virgil through hell until you reach the last plane, at that point Satan™ will teach you the secrets of metal if you can defeat him at a game of dick sucking, you came this far no turning back now after that you should reach Valhalla and Odin™ will decide if you're worthy to carry the name of True Metalhead™.
This is, my shitty fake screamo listening friend, is the rite of passage to true metalhood!™
Embrace the edge.
edgy != bad
>>49957582
Enjoy the music
>>49959674
Guess I should start going now
>>49959030
Dylan?
Step 1: Stop trying to be edgy.
Step 2: Stop trying to be tough.
Step 3: Listen to metal
>>49960263
Get going
just listen to black metal and shut the hell up.
