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>>25726776
Pineapple Archive:
http://anonpone.pineapplecomputing.com/meme/fana
>Snapping back into the world you slowly rub your temples a bit
>That was a trippy ass universe
>If Shade really wanted to stop ponies from using drugs he should just teach them how to use that dank ass dream magic instead
>Trying to get a bearing of where you are you squint as the morning sunlight shines through the crack between the curtains
>And that’s when you notice that you’re looking straight at Ast, who appears to be upside down
>In fact, the bed she’s sleeping on seems to be upside down as well
>”Gar, what are you doing?”
“What am I doing? What are YOU doing? How’d you get my bed on the ceiling?”
>She looks down at herself in confusion for a moment, the blanket rustling on top of her as she moves
>”Uh. Gar dear, you’re the one who’s on the ceiling”
>Oh. Should have expected that
>”Guess it’s a good thing you installed whatever that bar is, your teleportining is certainly getting out of hoof”
Ponder how to exchange inferior unicorn for best bat booty.
>>25833166
Nice prompt.
>>25833166
Yeah. Though it's not that bad.
Ask Ast to move so that we can fall onto our bed and then lay down again.
We need to get ready to go to work.
>>25833166
Examine penis.So why didn't we just get the ability to change our penis size at will?
>>25833166
>>25833196
Yeah, you need to work on those.
>Lookup to the bar your little hoofsies are clinging to it, firmly attached
>As your gaze lowers it fells upon your dick, carefully examining it
>It looks a bit smaller, but not what it used to be. Maybe it takes time to regress?
>Taking your mind off your penis issues your head points back to the bed Ast still curiously eyeing you
“Yeah, it can get annoying at times, but it’s not too bad, at least I don’t end up too far away”
>”Well hurry up get yourself down, we’ve got to get ready”
“Ok, just get off the bed for a sec, I need to stick this landing”
>As she gets back on the floor you line up with the center of the bed, hind hooves releasing
>A moment later you crash onto it, bed springing under you a couple times as it absorbs the impact
“Alright, let’s roll”
>Ast opens up the door and you quickly get off the bed to follow
>”So we need a shower, a little breakfast. Anything else?”
“Oh, I don’t thi-… Uh, what the hell is that?”
>You look down at the little remote controlled car, crashed into what appears to be a small streetlight made of Brickos
>Stagle nervously rubs the back of his neck while Kessy looks on
>”Think the insurance will pay for it?”
>”It has to, that ant ran into the road out of nowhere, I had to swerve or I was gonna hit the poor thing!”
>>25833647
Chariot should be fine. Ask if Stagle if he's ok. Pick up and look at the chariot. It should still work.
>”Gar, what insurance do you have?”
“Uh, just hang on a sec Stagle, that might not be necessary”
>”Gar, are you saying that you let two unsupervised breezies drive without insurance?”
“Don’t encourage them Ast”
>Reaching down you pick up the toy chariot to examine it, bringing it up to your face
>Looks perfectly fine to you, except for maybe a ding in the front
>Those Brickos must be hard though. You need to remember not to step on one
“Kessy, can you press the remote?”
>Immediately she nods, little hooves working the controls, the chariot responding by revving up and spinning it’s tire
“Well, seems fine to me”
>”You sure? If we claim that it’s totaled, the insurance might pay for a newer model!”
“Insurance fraud is nor degenerates Stagle. But you’re ok, right?”
>”My neck is a bit stiff, but I’m alright”
“Well good. I’ve got work in about an hour, and I need to get ready though, so you two try not to get in another accident”
>”We won’t Gar! No more deductibles for us!”
>Placing the car back down you roll your eyes at their promise, knowing that it’s only a matter of time
>Taking a few more steps towards the living room you notice however that the mare has disappeared from your side
“Ast?”
>Perking up your ears you hear the shower running, noting a trail of steam coming out from under the crack of the bathroom door
>>25834027
Just tell them you're not getting them a new one if they break the chariot. They'll be extra careful with the one they have.
start making breakfast so she has something to eat when she comes out. I think we have oats right?
>>25834027
Peep on Ast, then join in.
>Turning back to the breezies you watch them mounting up in the chariot, this time with Kessy at the wheel
“You two be careful with that thing. You’re not getting a new one if you break it”
>”Aw what? That’s not fair, plenty of ponies wreck their chariots!”
“Yeah and then they pay thousands of bits to have them fixed. You got that kind of money, squirt?”
>They both look at each other, shrugging
“Didn’t think so”
>As they finally hit the gas and speed off past your hooves into the living room you position yourself outside the bathroom door
>You could get breakfast ready, but then again you’ll need a shower as well
>Maybe you could conserve water if you join her? Gotta think about going green
>Her green plot that is
>Slowly cracking open the door you stealthily creep your way inside, quietly shutting it behind you
>Through the shower curtain you can make out the silhouette of a pony lathering herself in soap, humming a little tune as she goes about her business
>A devious grin purses on your lips as you realize that she’s unaware of your presence
>Just barely pulling back the curtain behind her, your snout pokes into the shower, face becoming a bit moist as water particles hit it
>There sits Ast, happily allowing the water to rain upon her chest
>God, look how much that tuft can absorb
>You continue your stalker oogling until she reaches back for some shampoo, finally noticing your presence
>With a surprised gasp she jumps back, pulling the curtain around her
>”Gar, didn’t your parents teach you to never peep on a lady?”
>>25834567
Yes but I just started crying until they gave me a candy.
>>25834567
they taught it to me though I choose not to practice it since there is such a pretty one in my shower.
>>25834567
I couldn't help it. The lady in my shower's just too pretty not to peep.
“Oh, they taught me that, but the lady in my shower was just too pretty to ignore”
>She roll her eyes, giving you cheeky grin
>”Well, glad to see that your parents did such a good job teaching you manners”
“Ok I’ll be honest, when they tried to teach me I just cried until they stopped and gave me candy”
>”… Just get in the shower”
“Yes mam!”
>Crawling into the tub you feel the soothing water sprinkle on your coat, washing away the post wake up sleepiness
>Oh and the cum. It’s washing away to cum too
>Picking up a bar of soap you begin to lather up, rubbing in in good against your chest until a mass of suds consumes you
>Playful you poke individual bubbles, giggling a bit as they pop
>You’re a simple pony, ok?
>But your fun is interrupted as a mass of green bumps into you, causing you to fall back into the bottom of the tub, Ast sitting on your chest
>Looking back she places a hoof playfully on your mouth, eyes faking concern
>”Oh dear, I should really watch where I’m sitting!... But while you’re back there be a dear up scrub my back, I can never quite reach it”
>A bottle of mango scented shampoo is hovered next to you in her green magic
>>25835028
Ast, you sure about the mango shampoo? You know what happened last time.
>>25835028
Yes ma'am.
>>25835028
Ast wants to smell like a mango? But if she does that it'll make it hard to ignore her all day wouldn't it?
This is going to be interesting. Let's clean Ast.
“You sure about the mango shampoo? You remember what happened last time”
>”Yes, I remember quite well how my very brave coltfriend stood up for me. Now get rubbin’!”
>The floating bottle is thrust into your hooves
“Yes mam”
>Popping up open with your own magic you squeeze out some of the fruity goop into your hoof, the gel tickling your frog
>Getting to work right away you begin to scrub the shampoo into her backside, kneading it into the fur
>Soon the suds are washing onto you as well, the heavenly scent overtaking you
>Man, it’s going to be hard keeping your mind off of her all day at work like this
>But you continue on with your scared task, brining cleanliness to Ast’s backside
>As you work your way in good, massaging hoofulls of the substance onto her, you Go a little lower, down to that tight little plot
>Gotta make sure that her entire backside is clean, right?
>Getting a little more soap you hike up her tail a bit with your magic, placing your hoof underneath it
>Getting the soap onto her dock you roll the little patch of fur around, squeezing and massaging it as you work it in
>Soon enough feel your chest begin to heat up slightly right where Ast is sitting
>Looking slightly past her back you see that her eyes are shut, heated breath escaping her open mouth as she pants
>This is all very hot and all, but you are a manager now, and must set aside such primal desires to get to work on time, and as such you release her tail, going back to cleaning her back
>You better get employee of the month for what you’re sacrificing
>As you finish your task Ast slowly removes her rump from you, but not before giving it a quick shake in your face, the good hidden behind her tail becoming ever so slightly visible as it sways
>… This booty is going to be the death of you one day
>Standing up you both huddle under the water, washing away the suds
>Finishing up soon two slightly damp fluffed up ponies exit the bathroom, Ast with a towel around her mane
>>25835591
Let's grab a quick breakfast and get headed out.
>>25835591
Time for foob
>Time to eat you suppose
>As Ast continues to dry off you hip up some breakfast, setting out some oats for both of you
>Looking at the clock you realize that the shower took longer than expected, and time is running short
>Shoveling the food into your mouth you prompt Ast to do the same, but she seems more concerned with drying her fur
>But in due time her bowl lies empty and both of you grab your bags, ready to go
“Stagle, Kessy. Remember what I said about that chariot!”
>”No problem!”
>The toy goes flying through the living room, Dixie playing as they honk the horn
>Shaking your head as you lock up you and Ast head out on your way into the city
>The walk there was actually pretty uneventful, as normal as always, along with a relaxing bit of small talk
>But arriving at the store you find that the window that you broke in your werebat fruit lust has finally been replaced
“Oh cool, they fixed the window”
>”Yup, the took care of it just the other day. Let’s hope they can still catch the thief though”
>Or we could not
>Stepping inside Ast heads over to clock it, yourself doing the same
>But that’s until you see your boss which trotting over, huge grin on his muzzle
>”There he is! Gar, it’s good to have you finally back! You know how hard it was to have Ast try to fill your place in loss prevention while you were gone? Condom thefts were through the roof”
>Ast stands behind the counter, sheepishly grinning as she scuffs her hoof
>>25835829
Ast tells me you already heard a bit about how I did on the test.
>>25835829
I blew up a building, are you proud of me?
>>25835829
When can we watch the video?
>>25835829
> Condom thefts were through the roof
Hopefully it's not those same two bats.
>>25835829
What the hell? It's been that bad? Well then I guess we better guard the condoms today.
I don't think we brought the video tape.
>Condom thefts spiking? Hm, better guard them closely today
>Hopefully it isn’t those same two bats. You really hope that you got through to them, but you know how hard bat habits die
“So boss, Ast says that you already heard a little about my trip”
>”Sure did, the seminar manager actually called me about your performance”
“I blew up a building, are you proud of me?”
>”Proud of you? I’ve never been prouder!”
“Really?”
>”Of course! In all my years as a store owner I never thought I’d see the day that one of my employees had the balls to destroy a supermarket. Reminds me of Vietneighnam!”
>A VERY satisfied grin creeps across his face before he snaps back to reality
>”Just don’t destroy this one, ok? Just not without my permission”
“You got it boss”
>”So, you want to watch some of the footage now? We still got a little time before things really pick up”
>Damn. You forgot the tape at home
“Oh, I uh actually forgot the tape…”
>”No need to threat my boy, look what I’ve got”
>He pulls a tape out of his saddle bag
“Wha- where’d you get that?”
>”They mailed it to me because they said that I should really review it before setting you back out on the job. Personally, this makes me want you working ASAP”
>He waves a hoof towards his office
>”Come on, this is going to be good”
>Following him in you shut the door, taking a seat as he turns the small TV on his desk towards you, popping in the tape
>After a bit of static the black and white recording begins, Pen walking up behind you as you casually stroll to the door
>”I’ve watched you blow this guy up about 20 times, and I’m still as impressed as ever. I honestly didn’t know you had it in you Gar, I mean, this griffon was a monster!”
>>25836260
Well, I really wanted to pass the test and since it was all fake anyway I thought that I could do anything to make sure I won.
>>25836260
You now how it is. Sometimes you have to set your drinking buddy on fire to keep your job.
“Well, I really wanted to pass the test. And it was just a simulation anyway, so I figured that I’d go all out”
>”Still, it was pretty amazing ho- Oh wait wait! This is the best part!”
>Your boss looks on with excitement as the camera focuses on Pen slamming into the front door
>Then all of a sudden he pauses, wings quickly extending as he jumps backwards
>A fraction of a second later the store rocks, fire bursting through the door, Pen just barely escaping it
>”Oh man, just like napalm! You burnt that bird good”
“I suppose, but he did end up tracking me down outside”
>”Yeah but you still beat him. Look at him roll around, damn near burnt every feather off his head”
>Your boss quickly throws his head back, pointing to the screen as he laughs heartily
>It’s honestly freaking you out a bit
>But he calms down soon enough, wiping a tear from his eyes
>”Ohhh, that was great…. But anyway, I guess it goes without saying how pleased I am”
>He reaches under the desk, rummaging around
>”And for your stellar performance, I think that you have beyond a doubt earned this”
>His hooves raise up, presenting a silver box before you, the letters ‘L.P.’ on it
“What is it?”
>”Your new tools… manager”
>The box flips upon, revealing a lavish silk lined interior, but something else catches your unblinking stare
>A taser, a pair of sunglasses, and a golden badge with the initials ‘L.P’ elegantly engraved upon it
>”Go on Gar. They’re all yours”
>>25836624
Try not to cry.
>>25836624
This is the best day ever! Take the box. Thank your boss. Put on the sunglasses. Look cool as fuck
>As your eyes grow wide, the glowing aura in the box nearly overtakes you, tears beginning to well up
>No, not now Gar. There will be time for tears, but not now
>You will not let the most important event of your life include tears
>Using every ounce of your strength to hold them back you look at your boss, lips quivering
>”Now, as manager you will be help to a higher standard, but I know what you know this all too well. For now on, you answer to me, and nopony but me”
“Y-yes boss”
>”All the glory, and failures of your department will rest solely upon your shoulders, as are the actions of those appointing below you. Understood?”
“As clear as can be”
>A satisfied smile breaks on his lips
>”Good. Gar, it is with great pride that I promote you. Henceforth, you shall be known as Mr. Iceon, head of loss prevention”
“This… this is the greatest day of my life”
>”I’m glad it is Gar. Now go on, take it. You’ve earned them”
“Thank you boss, thank you so much!”
>Reaching out with shaky hooves the box is transferred over to you, shaking slightly as you place it in front of you
>Oh my god, look at that taser. Those prongs look so shocky!
>Your attention is diverted as a gold reflection is cast upon your face
>Slowly rubbing a hoof on the badge, you feel the engraving, savoring the touch
>But the glasses, those sunglasses
>Man those looks sick
“Boss, I appreciate all that you’ve done for me
>Hovering into the air you place them on squarely on your face, the room dimming
“But now, I’ve got a job to do”
>He merely nods
>>25837054
The best way to support loss prevention is to be friendly. We don't get too many customers, so engaging with each one and reading their reactions. People who are aloof, wearing out of season clothing, and make multiple trips in and out are greater risks.
>>25837054
Guard condoms.
>>25837054
Get out and do our fucking job like nobody's business.
Pausing
>>25837122
Sleep tight, sleepyracist
>>25833157
nice OP
>>25838244
World needs more big hipped bats
>>25839095
T H I S T B H F A M
>>25833157
>Autistic batmemes CYOA
Batfags truly are cancer.
>>25840522
I'm sorry Shiny, but your batcancer is terminal. You have only 3 weeks to shitpost.
>>25840585
I assure you that the time will be well spent doctor
>>25840388
good taste desu
I want to take a fluffed-up Gar and clean a chalkboard with him.
>>25842452
Ok sicko, you've crossed the line
>You get up out of the chair, marching out the door before respectively shutting it
>Turning around, you survey your domain, and all the ponies that fall within it
>It won’t be easy, but now starts the next chapter in your career
>The part where you look like a badass electrocuting perps
>Putting the taser at your side you head off into the aisles
>Strutting along you observe your new territory through the tinted lenses, focusing half your energy into looking cool, and the other half into observing potential threats
>Setting up shop in the aisle that contains the condoms you keep your eyes peeled, on guard for any thieves who may want to partake in responsible protected sex
>But instead your vision becomes filled with a cherry colored pegaus, slowly lowering into your field of view as she hoves, flapping her wings
>”Gar! How dare you run out on a date, especially one with ME in it”
>>25843203
I'm sorry, I thought you were daring Shade, not me.
>>25843203
I'll make it up to you with a back massage. would you like that?
“I’m sorry Floral, I thought that you were dating Shade, not me”
>”You weren’t dating me, but you were still on the date… besides, the more stallions, the better~”
>She gently rubs a hoof under your chin before landing before you, wings folding
>”But it’s alright, I know how easily Ast can get scared”
“She just didn’t like the movie was all”
>”No need to lie to me Gar. But you did the right thing, even if me and Shady had to go on the rest of the night alone”
>She mocks betrayal, throwing an arm across her forehead to which you roll your eyes
“You want me to make it up to you or something?”
>”Weeeell, I don’t want to pressure you or anything…”
“How about a back rub? Would you enjoy that?”
>Her eyes immediately light up, wings unfurling a little
>”Oh Gar I could never have you do such a thing… but if you get some down time today you know where to find me, just say that you’re ‘stocking paper towels’
>The thought of having an excuse to rub your hooves in her wingpits is certainly a tempting one, but you’re not sure if you’ll be able to go through with it, you are a manager after all
>”But anyway, I actually came to get you. You’ve got a visitor at the front”
“A visitor? Really?”
>”Yeah, come on!”
>Floral leads you on back to the front counter, but you can already see your visitor on the way there, her sandy mane betraying her
“Hey Nightlight, what brings you here?”
>”Gar, so glad that you’re here! Listen, remember how you said that you’d be happy to walk around town with me because of, well, your ‘friends’?”
“Yeah?”
>”Well, I have to go to the library and research some things, and I was wondering if after work you could drop by there and walk me home? You know, just to be safe?”
>>25843657
I should be able to. which library are you going to assuming there is more then one in this town.Also when we're alone with floral should we ask if she knows where a sex shop is? unless our store sells lube.
>>25843657
I'd love to.
>>25843657
Do we get to take the company taser with us, or is it ours to own?
“Well of course Nightlight, I’d love to!”
>Her tuft ears perk up, bashful look receding
>”Eeee! Thank you Gar!”
>Her leathery wing extends, giving you a quick pat on the back
>Those things still feel weird, but at least you don’t freak out too much over them anymore
>Besides, you’ve been living with a pair attached to your back recently anyway
“So which library is it?”
>”Oh just the one down on Tapper Avenue, not too far from here”
“Ok, I think I know where that is. A little ways downtown?”
>“Yup. Like I said, not exactly too far, definitely in trotting distance”
“ Well I’ll certainly be there to walk you home, don’t you worry about that Nightlight”
>”You’re the best Gar, you really are. When you show up I should be wrapping up, so you won’t have to wait around too long”
>Thank god. The only time you’ve actually ever been forced to go to a library was when your parents made you go
>Well ok there was that time when that new Hoofler biography came out. Got a library card here just to check it out
>”I’ve got to be going now, but thanks again Gar. Glad I’ve got a friend like you”
“It’s no problem Nightlight. Take care though, hope your studying goes well!”
>The bat gives you a wave, heading towards the door and out onto the street
>Your sharp eyes follow her slightly bouncing plot all the way as she merrily trots along, tail swishing a little
>Bat mares, man…
>>25844375
Let's get back to work guarding those condoms.
>>25844375
Off to do our job.
>As the booty disappears from view you finally break out of your lustful haze, walking back from the doors
>Business seems to be picking up, with more and more ponies finally entering the store, Ast and Floral doing their best to keep the building line moving at the check out
>You aren’t the smartest, but you do know one thing
>More customers means more chance for a shop lifter
>Quickly scooting back into the aisles you set up shop near the end of the department that has the condoms, which offers a clear view at the merchandise, but still conceals you from anyone heading down the aisle
>Good thing before you became a responsible employee you mapped out all the blind spots to hide from your supervisors
>Now that your command post is set, you wait
>The condom display was restocked this morning as usual, and not a box is out of place… for now
>Should be easy to notice when one gets swiped
>Starring forward into the valuable arrangement, you blink only when absolutely necessary, ensuring constant monitoring
>…
>You’re not sure how long it’s been, but time keeps crawling on
>Plenty of ponies have walked by the display, but none have even stopped to look at the condoms yet
>Yawning, you rub your eyes a bit
>Man, you shouldn’t have stayed up all night fooling around with Ast
>Looking up at the ceiling you close your eyes, stretching as your back pops
>Damn that felt good
>Your five second break over, you look back to the display an-
“… No”
>The world seems to fade away as your wide eyes gaze at packs of condoms
>Or more specifically, the one that is missing
>>25844697
Who are the closest customers that we can see? They have to have it. Let's try to follow them and see if they buy condoms.
>>25844697
Not a big deal, just do what we're trained to do.
They can't have left the store yet. Keep an eye on the customers near us, looking specifically for people who're acting suspicious.
>>25844697
look for people hovering close to a shelf or who seem to be wandering back and forth looking for an empty aisle.
>Fuck. Ok, you can handle this. A manager must be able to adapt to any situation
>And there’s no way that they’ve left the store yet. You can stop this, just fall back on your training in a non explosive manner
>Peeking out into the aisle, you notice a few customers
>A mother pushing her foal in a cart, idly looking at sales tags
>A random goat comparing prices on two bottles of lube
>Wonder how kinky goats ar- Damn it Gar, focus
>Other than that the only other customer is some bat pony in a baseball cap and a hoodie
>… Why is he wearing a hoodie in the summer?
>Watching as he turns the corner you wait for his shortly cropped tail to disappear before following
>Making it to the end of the aisle you poke your snout around, eyes soon following
>The whole section is empty except for him
>You observe as he looks around at the products in a somewhat hesitant fashion, shifting his weigh from hoof to hoof when he stops
>But that’s when his hoof reaches up, grabbing a pack of razors
>With eyes like a hawk you watch as he stealthily begins to stuff it in his hoodie pocket
>And quickly turn to walk away, only to stop dead in his tracks
>There he stands, eyes as wide as dinner plates as he peers at you down the aisle, the pack of razors hanging half way out of the pocket as his hoof freezes
>You can see his ears fold flat against his head even with the cap on
>>25845155
Start walking towards him. Maybe we even get to use our taser on him if we're lucky.
>>25845155
Legally, we're not allowed to approach him until he's failed to pay for the items.
Either outside the store or after the last point of sale.
So go outside and wait for him there.
>>25845155
Ask if we can help him with anything and to please use one of the baskets provided to carry his products. Walk him around the store and make it as uncomfortable as possible.
>>25845155
Point you hoof at your eyes then him, to let him know you're watching.
Then slink back like a creep.
>Caught red hoofed
>He knows it, you know it, but unfortunately you legally can’t do anything until he actually pays for the items, so you’ll just do the next best thing
>Make it awkward as fuck
>You slowly lift a hoof off the floor, his slit pupils nervously following it up
>Pointing the hoof at your narrowing eyes you quickly point it back at him, causing him to take a step back
>With as much dramatic effect as you can muster your head slowly slinks back around the corner like a total creep
>Now for the fun part
>Trotting quickly to the other end of the aisle you turn the corner and reappear a few feet behind the confused bat, still looking at the end you disappeared behind
“Hello there sir!”
>”AH!”
>He jumps around, pack of razors and condoms falling out of his hoody in the frantic motion
“Are you finding everything that you need alright?”
>”Y-yes, I’m fine”
>He bends over, hoofs frantically trying to scoop up the merchandise but only succeeding in having it knock around the floor
“Oh dear, do you need help with those sir?”
>”No! I-I mean, I’m fine”
“Well, just a friendly reminder to use the baskets as provided to carry merchandise around in, wouldn’t want other to…”
>You quickly lean in, starring the bat down
“… Get the wrong impression”
>He seems dumbfounded for a moment, and finally manages to pick up the packs, beads of sweat forming on his fur
>”I’ll keep that in mind… sir”
“Oh I know you will. But come on, lets get you that basket so that you can have an excellent customer experience!”
>”Oh, that won’t be necce-“
“Nonsense!”
>Ushering him along you get him a basket, the condoms and razors placed neatly inside of it
>He attempts to awkwardly keep shopping, but your back seat customer service help seems to have him on edge
“… Those are a good deal”
>”Th-thanks… But I think that I’m ju-“
“Oh no, please allow me to get those. They’re a little high up sir”
>”I don’t nee-“
“Nonsense. Look, you can save two bits if you just buy another one!”
>As you go down the aisle overzealously helping he finally stops, sighing as he turns around
>His legs shake a little, mouth looking a bit dry
>”Ok, I get it. I know you know what I was trying to do, and I’m sorry. Just please, no more ‘helping’. Please”
>>25845687
Very well, but I feel I should still accompany you until you return that merchandise or choose to pay for it.
>>25845687
if he admits intent can we boop him before he leaves the store?
Agree to stop helping and just start making exaggerated expressions based on his shopping choices.
>>25845687
We can make if even creepier if we said;
>Just remember, I'm here to help with anything you need, "anything".
>>25845687
quietly let him know if he needs help finding the right condoms we'll help.
>You give him your best ‘gotcha’ look, a sly smile on your lips
“Very well. But as manager I feel as though it is my duty to continue to accompany you until you either return the merchandise or pay for it”
>”Th-that seems fair…”
>He looks down into his basket before returning his gaze
>”I think that I might just shop a little more. I mean, I’m already here after all”
“Excellent choice, I’m sure that you will find a wide selection of products that suits you need sir”
>You lean your muzzle in, whispering
“Just remember, I'm here to help with anything you need. ‘Anything…”
>”I-I, uh… th-that’s alright”
“I understand. Well, if you ever need help selecting the right condoms, I’ll be more than happy to help. I do have extensive experience with them after all”
>”Um, o-okay. I’m shopping now”
>He turns around and starts walking, but you can see his face continue to barely turn, eyes straining to peek at you as you trail him
>You might have promised to stop helping, but there are other ways to make it awkward
>After a few more steps the bat pony stops, intently looking at a rack of batteries
>After a moment he lifts a hoof up, grabbing a pack
>You quickly gasp, a surprised look on your face
>He looks to you in total confusion, hoof slowly lowering
>Shrugging he moves over to the next pack, preparing to grab it
“Hmph”
>You roll your eyes, causing him to pause yet again
>After looking between you and the batteries a couple times an ‘aha’ moment appears on his face and he grabs the last remaining brand on the display
“Psh. Enjoy your under charged electronics”
>”That’s it. I’m done.”
>Shuffling quickly past you you watch as he trots up to the counter, nervously looking back to you as you peer at him with a smug face
>As the cashier checks him out he begs her to move faster, looking like he’s about to have a heart attack
>As soon as the total charge comes up he forks over the money and takes off, leaving his change
“Thank you for choosing Ponemart!”
>As you wave to the bat fleeing out the door some rustling in the shelf next to you catches your attention
>Soon some of the products are scooted out of the way, Floral’s face appearing
>”Wow. That was some pretty impressive flustering Gar, even by my standards”
>>25846264
Learned from watching the best.
>>25846264
Gotta earn that new paycheck and step up my game.
>>25846264
Must have picked it up from being around you, still need more practice though, he didn't really seem like a "hard" target...
“Thanks. Gotta step up my game, earn that new paycheck, you know?”
>”Oh I understand completely. Still was pretty darn impressive though”
“Well, I guess that I just learned from the best”
>She waves a hoof, giggling
>”Oh please Gar, you’re too kind”
“No it’s true, I must have picked it up from you. But I still need some more practice, he didn’t seem like too much of a ‘hard’ target”
>You give her a wink, nudging you elbow in the air a little as a devious smile forms on her lips
>”You’re right Gar, he didn’t seems very hard at all. But I could have fixed that”
>You roll your eyes at her antics, smirking
“I have no doubt that you could“
>”You don’t seem too hard at all either. Let me fix that as well~”
“Wait wha-“
>You don’t even have time to scream for help as you’re dragged into the shelf, powerless to resist the pegasus kidnapping you
>As soon as you’re tucked safely inside Floral pushes back the merchandise, hiding you two
>”Now…”
>She playfully splays out, lying on her belly
>”I believe you owe me something~”
>>25846811
As long as we don't have sex with or cum in her it's not cheating right?
And we have all those paper towels nearby anyway.
>>25846811
Just a massage.
>>25846902
But seriously, just give her a massage. Shade can see our memories, so keep it above belt. Go to town on those wings though.
>>25846944
That's what I meant, but last time we got our hooves on those wings we almost blew a load without even touching ourselves....
>>25846811
Get massaging her back then. Ask what she thinks of Shade
>>25846944
>Cheat with someone
>Remember after the fact that their significant other can see your memories
Give her a wing massage, try not to cum on the floor...
>Looking down at her spread out body you can’t but help but wipe some sweat off her brow
>She knows how much this makes you suffer
>But you know as well as she does that she doesn’t care
“J-just a massage?”
>”Just a massage. Make sure to get in the lower back real good, it’s been stiff all morning”
>She gives you a sultry stare as her legs are readjusted, wings unfurling out to her sides
>God this is too much
>Somehow you find the strength you move forward, hooves gently pressing into her back
>Floral gasps a bit in response, followed by a small coo
>”Oh Gar, you know how to work me in all the right places. Unlike those other disappointment of stallions that I drag in here”
“Th-thanks I guess? Glad that you think I’m so good”
>”Trust me, for your sake it better remain that way”
>Taking a deep breath you try not to focus on all of the times Floral’s caused a stallion to go missing out of the store
As your hooves knead under her back much to Floral’s pleasure you strike up some small talk
“So… How was Shade?”
>”You know Gar he- Ah, just a little lower… he’s a huge dork. But he’s a cute dork”
“So you like him?”
>”Sure do, might just be a keeper. I’m glad that you found such a cutie for me”
>>25847308
I'm glad it's working out. He didn't clam up or panic anymore after I left?
>>25847308
Well that's good. Have you made plans as to when you'll see him again?
just keep pressing where she tells you I guess. But don't stay too long.
Pausing
>>25847392
>>25847392
Sleep tight, Sleepyres.
>>25847414
Got a lot of nerve coming around here, Steelie. You think that you can just kiss my waifu without recuperation?
>>25847453
Sorry Dusk, but I think we all know Steelie's the superior husbando.
boop
when i offered that massage I thought it would have been taken at a later time.
>>25848258
You should know that floral takes what she wants when she wants anon
Where do I find pictures of these bats
I've seen a couple, are they on db?
>>25850376
http://anonpone.pineapplecomputing.com/meme/fanart
I want to drop Gar in a ball pit and watch as he helplessly sinks to the bottom.
>>25851293
Craft, could you please draw this?
>>25851293
>SAVE ME SHADE
>>25850572
>/meme/
How fitting, seeing as how this entire CYOA is almost nothing but retarded batmemes.
>>25851302
I'll try.
Work and star wars tonight though.
Then lots of christmas poners.
But damnit anon, i'll try.
up from 10.
>Gar trying to doggy-paddle in the ballpit.
>He's just throwing plastic balls around everywhere and digging himself deeper.
should we ask floral why she takes stallions and what she does with them?
Because now is the perfect chance while we're squeezing her flank.
>>25853544
back anon. we're squeezing her back in a non sexual manner
>>25853544
T H I S T B H F A M
“Well I’m glad that it’s working out between you two. You make any other plans to visit him again?”
>”Not yet, but we both areed that we’ll meet up again real soon. He seem pretty excited about it”
“Now he didn’t like sperg out or panic after me and Ast left did he?”
>”Nope, acted like a total gentlecolt, even beat me to punch and gave me a kiss during the movie”
>Maybe he just needed to get over his Ember PTSD before regaining a backbone?
>”Guess he just had cold hooves to begin with, but the rest of the night he was totally fine. A little too fascinated with Neighponese culture, but otherwise normal”
>You’re surprised that he didn’t bring up his waifu to her
>”Hey rub a little lower, I’ve got a knot down there”
>You nervously follow her command, hoof straying dangerous low down her back, brushing against her flank as you massage
>”Oh that’s the stuff, that’s been feeling tight all morning”
>Floral contently sighs, enjoying your handiwork as you desperately try to not stare at her well-toned plot
>And fail spectacularly
>Trying to take you mind off thing you blurt the first thing that comes to you
“S-so, Floral. Why exactly do you pull stallions back here?”
>”Eh, mostly because I’m bored, or they catch my eye and I JUST have to have them”
“Oh. Well, what do you do with them?”
>”Oh you know, just some stuff. But let’s just say that they usually don’t protest it for long~”
>>25854297
W-well, I've got to get back to work. Don't want any more condoms fisappearing on us.
>>25854297
Ask her how long has she been doing this. We can make a timeline of when the stallions started disappearing.
>>25854297
Tell her we're still kinda humbled that one of the only reasons she hasn't retired and lived her life in comfort is because of us and Ast. And her lust for the hunt, but still.
>>25854436
It's all a ruse. One of these days Floral will take us when we least suspect it
>>25854297
Snap her neck while she least expects it.
You can stop her streak of kidnapping.
>>25854297
Tickle her wingpits.
>>25854485
But what about Ast?
>>25854537
She'll mail us back to Ast after she's had her fun
>>25854522
remove bat
>>25854624
But it's not a bat. Although I am interested in seeing what a bat version of Floral would look like
>Your hoof kneads the flesh around in a little circle, eliciting more sighs from the pegasus
“So how long have you been doing this for?”
>”Doing what?”
“You know, stealing stallions in the store?”
>”Hmmm… I’d say a few months. One day I saw just the most adorable earth pony and I couldn’t contain myself, been doing it ever since”
>Maybe with this information you can establish a timeline of all the stallion disappearances
“You know, I’m really honored Floral”
>”To what? Have the pleasure of massaging a mare such as myself~?”
“No. Well, yes, but I also meant how even though you could retire right now and never have to work in this place again, you stick around because of me and Ast”
>”Oh and the thrill of the hunt dear, don’t forget that”
>Smiling a bit as you continue to rub you nod
“And the hunt, I won’t forget”
>”Good. But you and Ast are great friends, and I can’t think of a pair of better ponies”
>You know, even through all the awkward moments that she’s put you through, Floral really is a great friend
>You feel Floral’s body shift breathe you, her legs stretching out
>”Ahhhh… I think you finally got it”
>Removing your hoof she lays there with a pleased expression
“Well, glad I could help. But I have to get back to work, make sure that no more condoms go missing, you know?”
>You turn exit but Floral calls out
>”Oh, trying to escape so soon?”
>In a flash both her wings unfurl, making a *pomf* sound, wingpits exposed as she leans them forward
>”Why, you haven’t even gotten to work on the main course dear~”
>>25854819
but we've been gone for awhile and it's your first day as security. how about later?
>>25854819
Not now. I really should be getting back to the work I'm being paid to do.
>>25854819
Floral, we both know about my wing fetish by now and I need to be able to walk around in public, how about we take care of that on our lunch break.
>>25854819
KILL HER
RIP OUT HER PONY JUGGULAR
>>25855083
DON'T DO IT
>>25854819
rub them sweet babies
>>25855083
This. I wonder if Res will actually allow us to do such a thing if enough people vote on it.
>She rolls onto her side, wing extending out a bit before waving you towards her
“But Floral, I’ve been gone a while an-“
>”Oh what’s the rush Gar? The store isn’t going anywhere”
>The sultry pony gives you a wink, ruffling her feathers
“Floral look, we both know about my wing fetish by now”
>She fakes a surprised gasp
>”Gar, the unicorn supremacist has wing fetish? Unimaginable!”
“Ok ok I get it. But I should really get back to the work I’m being paid to do”
>”Hmph. One day as manager, and you’re already rejecting these babies”
>Her hoof runs down a wing, making a show of the feathers
>”Well, do what you must ‘Mr. Iceon’. I suppose I should get back to work as well”
>She reaches over and grabs her work apron, sitting up and fastening it around her chest
“I appreciate you understanding. But maybe we can finish this later?”
>”Oh you bet Gar, I’m always ready”
>Pushing aside some shelf products you look both ways down the aisle before slipping out, landing on the tiled floor, Floral following you soon after
> Back to work it is
>The day goes on, shifting from morning to afternoon, time ever ticking by as the sun starts to by eclipsed by the city’s buildings
>Not much had happened on the shift since the attempted shop lifting
>Well, except for that prank call
>Thank god one of the store’s refrigerators just so happened to not be working today, you might have looked like an idiot otherwise
>As business starts to wind down you see the boss come out of his office, trotting right towards you
“Hey boss, what’s up”
>”Oh just taking a small break. But anyway, almost a full day as a manager huh? What do you think?”
>>25855362
Kill your boss
>>25855362
I think this job is great. The glasses are cool. You kind of want a big hat to wear too.
>>25855362
I'm going with this new Anon, kill him.
>>25855362
Pretty good. Flew by, really.
>>25855362
Do I really have to vote against murdering our boss for no reason?
>>25855419
>>25855475
don't kill the boss since it would be retarded and we'd lose our awesome job. Not to mention the fact we're standing in the middle of the fucking store where everyone can see us.
>>25855500
Propose to the boss. Tell him you've always loved him and how you want his thrusting stallion sausage deep in your cave of wonders.
>>25855530
No.
>>25855362
It's great- something we can really be proud of doing.
>>25855547
Yes
>>25855554
So close
>>25855555
“It feels pretty good, it’s something I can finally be proud of”
>”Well I’m glad that you’re enjoying it. It took a while, but you finally made something out of your time here”
Sure did. But the day flew by though”
>”Yeah I know what you mean. I remember just starting this place up on the first day thinking how exciting it’d be. That was twenty years ago”
>He chuckles a bit at his own comment, patting you on the shoulder
>”So do you need anything? Questions about the job?”
“Well… There is one thing”
>”And that is?”
“The sunglasses are really cool, but I kind of want a big hat to wear too”
>”A big hat?”
“Yeah you know, maybe something cool like a police helmet. With flashing lights too!”
>”I uh, don’t think that that’s in the budget right now. But I’ve got my old drill sergeant hat back in the office”
“Do you think I could wea-“
>”No.”
>You both just kind of stare at each other for a second
>”Well… Enjoy the job!”
>He gives you another friendly pat before heading back towards the office
>Pretty soon the sun starts to hang low in the sky, the shadows of the buildings beginning to slash into the store through the windows
>”Closing time!”
>Ast excitedly begins to run behind the counter, taking her uniform off
>”Yeah Gar, closing time”
>Floral slowly trots by, running wing across your side, your body shivering under it’s touch
>>25855882
We need to go walk Nighty to the library.
>>25855882
Get lube. Go to library and pick up nightlight.Say good bye to ast since she presumably needs to feed maury. Kiss her good bye and say you'll see her later.
>>25855882
He won't let you wear the hat.
He interrupted you.
He disrespected you.
Why do you let this filth continue to fester in your presence? SMITE HIM NOW
>>25856252
Someone's father didn't teach him proper hat edicate
>>25856277
>etiquette
>>25856252
Just stop.
>>25855882
Onwards to Nightlight escort mission.
>Watching your fellow coworkers begin to close up a very pressing issue becomes apparent to you
>Your home is lubeless!
>Quickly dashing back into an aisle you snatch a decent side bottle of the precious substance, certainly enough for the next time Ast visits
>Trotting up to the register you operate the machine by yourself paying for the item before the boss makes the rounds to collect the money
>”What you got there?”
“Uh, it’s surprise Ast”
>”Oh really now?”
“Yeah. But don’t worry, you’ll know what it is soon enough”
>”Oh I just can’t wait”
>She stands up on the tips of her hooves, nose just barely touching against yours as you stare down at her
“So… Have to go feed Morry I suppose?”
>”Yeah, he’s quite the hungry kitty. You should come over and say hi to him!”
>The thought of an angry gray fluff ball leaping into the air and shredding your face pops into your mind
“Uh, actually I have to go meet Nightlight at the library”
>”You? Reading books?”
>Ouch
“Surprising, I know. But I promised”
>”Oh I’m just pulling your leg Gar, go ahead and do what you need to do”
“Well, before I go, I still need to do this”
>Pushing your muzzle slightly forward you give her a peck on the lips which she graciously returns
>As you separate she takes a moment to rub her velvety little nose onto yours, which you concede to with a smile
>”Well, guess I’ll see you soon Gar”
“Yeah, see you Ast!”
>With that the boss shuts down the power, you and the other employees walking out into the night
>The library takes a little trotting to get to, but it’s hard to miss, a structure over a century old with elaborate stone cravings and statues along the outside
>Pushing your way through the heavy oak doors you take your first steps inside of the place in years
>It’s a massive building, with three levels filled with shelves upon shelves of books, all neatly arranged into sections
>And being as old as it is it still has those old school sliding ladders that reach up to the tops of the tall bookcases
>Walking through the somewhat dimly lit reception area you approach the front desk, a stallion filling out some paper work
“Excuse me, I’m looking for my friend. Have you seen her?”
>”What’s she look like?”
“Her name is Nightlight, bat pony. Has a sandy mane, firefly cutie marks”
>”Hmmm…”
“Has a NICE ass”
>”Ah yes, now I remember! She’s on the second floor I believe, biology section”
>Thanking him you run up the old carpeted staircases, making your way to the section
>Sure enough you spot her at a desk, furiously reading away, a few books stacked near her
>>25856505
Walk up to her, give her a playful smack on the ass.
We still have our taser, right?
>>25856505
>>25856522
Don't molest the Nightlight.
Just call out to her.
>>25856505
Sneak up to her and tap her on the shoulder. Whisper hello since you're in a library after all.
>>25856555
This.
>>25856555
I cannot deny the trips.
>>25856522
>"EEE!"
>>25856578
Eh, fuck it, changing my vote to buttspank.
>>25856505
Use piano wire and take her by surprise
shouldn't we just give her a small pat on the ass before the quest is over?
>>25856815
No.
>>25856815
If the opportunity presents itself. But if it never does then it never does.
>>25856815
No.
>>25856693
>Spanking a mare that's not our waifu.
Come on, Anon.
>Stealthily crawling forward you snake your way among the bookshelves, determined to not be detected
>Silently trotting out behind her the poor bat does suspect a thing, her mind still focused on her studies as she turns another page in the book
>Taking another few steps behind her you position yourself in striking distance, watching as her ear casually flicks a couple times as she reads
>Tapping her on the shoulder you whisper, since you are in a library after all
“Hello”
>”EEP!”
>She jumps in her chair, wings slightly spreading before nervously looking around
>Some random librarian appears out of nowhere from behind a bookshelf, placing a hoof to her mouth
>”Shhh!”
>”Sorry…”
>As Nightlight’s ears flop down the librarian retreats as quickly as they came
“So do they just wait around to do that to ponies, or?”
>”Gar, what are doing? You almost gave me a heart attack!”
>Sporting your best smile you pull out a chair next to her, taking a seat next to the bat
“I’m here to walk you home as promised!”
>Nightlight’s expression immediately softens, tufted ears perking up again
“Oh I knew I could count on you Gar”
>Reaching in she pulls you into a quick hug, voluptuous chest tuft rubbing against you
>It’s soft, fluffy touch feels like heaven…
“Th-thanks”
>”No problem”
>Letting you go with a tint of pink in her cheeks, she looks back down at the book
“So yeah, let’s just grab what you need an-“
>”O-oh Gar, I actually need a little more time”
“More time? But it’s getting dark out”
>”I’m sorry, but I really need to finish this. It won’t take long, I promise”
“But what am I supposed to do in the meantime?”
>She gives you puppy dog eyes, stars shimmering in them as they look to you
>”Oh Gar, the library is such a wonderful place, there’s something here for everypony!”
>Her hooves excitedly gesture around the room
>”Go on and explore, I’m sure you’ll find something interesting”
>>25857150
>How to Be Less of a Racist Fuck: A Book for Foals
>>25857150
Let's look for books on Breezies.
>>25857150
Reading? I kind of bought books to make me look more politically informed.
>>25857150
>making us read
I thought you were a friend nightlight
also you DON'T have a library card and can't just take the book out?
Let's find "the little earth filly that could" that tale is a classic. or whatever book that's easy.
>>25857150
While she's distracted, put a knife in her neck.
She trusts you and will be none the wiser until she's bled out.
>>25857237
How bored are you?
>>25857409
Shiny's switching tactics
>>25857409
Not bored. Just wanting to try something new.
>>25857497
how about you wait till we encounter drug dealers then.
“Reading? Eww”
>Your face becomes more stern, like a mother catching her foal avoiding their vegetables
>”Now Gar, reading is good for you, it helps stimulate the brain”
“How could you make me read Nightlight? I thought we were friends!”
>”Oh come on, I know that you’ll find something here that you like, it’s got everything”
“But I haven’t really read a book in… a while. I kind of just bought some to look politically informed”
>”Well here’s your chance to dive into a good book!”
“I also don’t really have a valid library care”
>”Oh nonsense. Tell you what, find something nice that catches your eye, and I’ll check it out for you”
“Weeeell”
>She leans up, eyes full with hope as her two little fangs poke out from her smile
“Maybe I could just read, you know, one little book”
>”I knew you’d come round Gar! You’ll find something nice, I know you will”
“Alright, well I’ll go get on that. Meet you back here when you’re done?”
>”Sounds like a plan”
>Nightlight shoves her snout back down into the book, intently reading away
>Well, time to find something worth reading… or at least something that you’re able to read
>Trotting off, you weave your way through huge collections of books, all neatly arranged in rank and file on their shelves
>It’s kind of creepy now that you think of it, what with all these dusty books in an ancient building, barley any ponies around
>But as you turn the corner you run into just the pony you needed to
>A librarian
“Excuse me miss, do you happen to have a copy of ‘How to Be Less of a Racist Fuck: A Book for Foals’?”
>”…No”
“Oh. Well how about the Filly that Could?”
>”Are you seriously asking for foal’s books?”
“Well not entirely. I need a book on breezies too”
>She give you an unamused look, huffing quietly to herself
>”Foals books are on the first story, something on breezies will be on the third level”
>>25857651
Third floor. Maybe we could figure out how to get those mooches out of our apartment and back home.
>>25857651
Alright then. Let's go to the third floor and then when we come back down to the first we can look at foals book.
>>25857651
Ask if they have back copies of "Big Bootied Bats".
If so, ask which one is her favorite.
Pausing here. Any questions?
>>25857651
Be DEVILISH
Go find a romance novel for mares, probably 50 Shades of Hay because it'll be read by some lonely housewife
Find a saucy part in the book and wipe a boogie off on the page
>>25857759
Back at the start of the story, Gar said he got kicked out of Colt scouts after he found out he escorted an alicorn across the street. Which alicorn was that?
>>25857759
If you had to rate Nightlight's ass as an x/10, how hard would it break the scale.
>>25857759
Why is nightlight such a book loving NERD?
How many pets has gar had if any?
What would gars parents say they were the most proud about him before he changed?
Does nightlight know she has a terrific ass?
>>25857787
Gar does''t know, and Gar doesn't care. Just some degenerate who decided to soil their horn with a pair of wings
>>25857803
Nightlight possesses the very definition of a bat ass. It's 11/10
>>25857822
How can she be a nerd if she doesn't wear glasses?
Besides his ant farm he had a gerbil. HAD
Finally getting his GED
She's bashful about it, but can't really deny it when stallions are forever talking about her rump
>>25857651
'Something on Breezies' is an odd title for a book.
>>25857892
How would one best bypass public opinion and switch us from being in a relationship with Ast to being in one with Nightlight.
>>25857925
A routing number
>>25857946
how long would gar be able to resist nightlight booty if she was just bending over right in front of him.
>>25857967
With the ratio of how well proportioned, yet fat it is? Hard to tell. Guess you'll just have to find out
>>25858009P-pls
>>25858009
Tell us!
How irresistable is the batbooty?
>>25858036
>>25858102_________ :^) _________
>>25851302
>>25858245
I love it. Take this spooky bat as payment.
>>25858301
What the hell is that?
Ice?
>>25858245
Gar's parents once took him to a ballpit. Needless to say, he cried, began sinking, had to be saved, and now has PTSD.
>>25858473
At least they took a picture of it to capture the memory
>>25858473
Ball pits and cardboard boxes. What else is Gar morbidly frightened of?
>>25860045
butt
We need to tell Nightlight to put the books down and that she's wasting her talent. She needs to be at the club giving lap dances
>>25860980
I whole-heartedly agree. That way she can really light up somebody's life.
I think we should tell nightlight to go out on a jog sometime.
>>25861726
And harden her soft, plush booty? Not a chance.
So, urban, if i were to start on thread one, how many words would i have to catch up on?
>>25861745
>>25861765
>>25861763forgot about that, but this browser sucks
Fuck, if i can read a few hundred thousand word autistic fic i can do this, r-right guys?
captcha cactus
>>25861794
get on my level son.
>>25861794
on fimfic*
do i kill myself on livestream?
>>25861794
Fuckin' scrub
>>25861815
Tracking folder
Total Words: 17,631,696
Favorites folder
9,236,145
>>25861726
only if we can run directly behind her.
>>25861889
>you will never have a huge, jiggling, sweaty bat butt trotting in front of you
Reminder that tiny Gar had this planet sized ass crushing down on him
I hope we're able to find interesting books.
Hello loyal memers, your quest experience is very important to us. Unfortunately Urban wont be running tonight. Please direct all customer complaints to /CYOA/
>>25863167
Looks like you're reverting to your disgusting normie ways.
>>25863167
have fun with whatever you're doing res. I'll just sit here and think of ways for us to touch that bat booty.
so far the only idea i've had is "accidentally" walking into it.
bump from page 10
Let's go into nightlights house when we're done walking her home.
>>25862452
And I feel a great amount of envy for him
Not only because he got lewded by a giant batpone, but because batpone liked him to such an extent that she did what she did to have him
You will never know such love in your lifetimeand if you don't think that's the saddest shit then you can fuck outta here
>>25866276
W-wait. Are you actually romanticizing rape?
Because I didn't ask for this feel.
>>25866304
It's not rape when a girl does it. And admit it, if a girl (or pone) kidnapped you because she wasn't able to tell you she loved you from afar, you'd let her slide if she did a little raping.
>>25866562
Yeah, you're probably right
>>25862452
She'll never sit on your face
>>25868944
JUST
Will Gar be able to finish a book?
>>25871330
Of course not.
>>25871330
'The mare with too many feathers'
I want to feed Gar peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.Petroleum Jelly
>>25871918
I want to lift Gar up by his hind legs and watch as his front legs kick uselessly in the air.
>>25871918
>>25871960
You people need help
>>25872716
I want to tie bat Gar's wings to his barrel and dangle a mango just out of his reach.
>>25872867
Replace the mango with Nightlight's ass and you're on to something
Waiting bump
You can pretend to be a bat all you want Ast, but your petite little behind will always pale in comparison to Nightlight
We should try to find a flash light spell.
>>25874847
We already have lumos. Every unicorn does.
>>25874857
Oh. i don't remember ever using it.
>>25874872
I'm more assuming since:
A:Foals with next to no magical ability have used it in the show
B:Our specialty is fire.
I should hope we can make light
“Something on Breezies is a weird title for a book”
>”Uh… yeah. Anyway, is there anything else that I can help you wi-“
“Big bootied bats”
>”Excuse me?”
“Big bootied bats, do you have copies?”
>”Sir are you even a member here?”
“No but Nightlight said that I could check out a book!”
>”Well I suggest you do just that and get moving”
>Geez, bitch
>Halfheartedly thanking her you begin to trot off towards one of the staircases, the librarian seeming to be relieved at your departure
>Heading up the stairs you find yourself on the dimly lit third story
>It appears to be entirely deserted, the rows of old bookshelves seeming as if they’ve been undisturbed for decades
“Time to see if I can find a way to get these mooches out of my apartment”
>Stepping into the silent rows of books you weave this way and that through the shelves of literature, searching for anything breezie related
“Let’s see, breezies... breezies…”
>Oh here we go!
>No wait, that’s Brazzers
>Walking further down the shelf you keep looking knowing that they can’t be too far off
>Looking high and low you move past all of the ancient push ladders, extending easily 20 feet into the air along the massive bookshelves
>But then, your luck finally breaks through
>Your eye spots exactly what you’ve been looking for at the very top of a shelf, a large, leather bound book
>Something on Breezies: A dissertation on Life Cycle and Customs
>>25874938
Sure.
>>25874938
Use TK to get it down.
>>25874938
climb up one of the push ladders, then teleport over to the book, grabbing it. After that use telekinesis to rpopel yourself across the aisle to the far bookshelf where we will use our excellent hoof/eye co-ordination to grab a shelf and climb down.
>Hey, looks good enough to you
>Taking a couple steps forward you light up your horn, you surround the book in a light blue aura, giving it a couple of solid tugs
>It doesn’t budge an inch
>Huh, must be really jammed in there. Guess you’ll just do it the old fashioned way
>Climbing up the ladder you steadily separate yourself from the ground, ascending ever higher
>Shelf upon shelf of books pass you as you continue your journey, all the way to the top
>Finally at the right height you reach over, stretching towards the desired book
>Even as you bend your body as far over as possible the book is just barely out of reach
>Hm. Should have moved the ladder over a tad more
>Looking back down at the ground below you, you realize that you’d have to be mildly inconvenienced to climb down and push it over
>Screw. That.
>Looking back to the book you begin to focus your energy, concentrating on it
>Slowly closing your eyes you feel a rush, your body being jerked
>Open opening them you find yourself hanging on the bookshelf, the book before you
“Awesome!”
>Planting your back hooves on the shelf under you you grab hold of the large book, pulling
>It still appears to be stuck
>Oh no, you aren’t getting upstaged by a book today
>Placing both your hooves around it you pull back with all your might, hind hooves pushing back against the shelf as you grit your teeth
“Come on… come… on”!
>As you strain you feel the ancient book finally begin to give way, wriggle little by little out of the shelf
>Almost there…
>With one last great tug you feel the book pop out
>And rushing wind against your back
>Hitting the ground a moment later you gasp as the air is knocked out of you, followed quickly by several books pelting you as they hit the floor
>Cringing as you look up you seem to have taken a few more books with you than anticipated, a decent sized gap of missing books on the top shelf
>>25875484
This is why books are terrible.
Let's read what the breezie book says.
>>25875484
Don't bother getting up. Just use magic to read where we are.
>>25875484
re-ordering books is the librarians job, patrons aren't supposed to do it. so lets read.
>Damn you Nightlight. You tried to tell her that all books end up causing is pain, but she wouldn’t listen
>Looking at all the books around you all you can do is shrug
“Meh. It aint my job to re organize these things”
>Some librarian will take care of it you’re sure
>Turning back to the object that brought you into this mess you crack open the book, not even bothering to pull yourself out of the pile that covers your body to open the book
>Flipping to a random page you begin something that you thought you’d never do
>Voluntarily and unironically reading
“Let’s see now…”
>’Breezies are known for their curious, yet self-destructive behavior, often getting into situations and objects that they know should be off limits”
>Yeah, you learned that one first hand
>’Also partial to creating fortifications and other defense networks to combat predation from larger creatures, ponies sometimes find themselves stumbling into these arrays, often getting pricked by various tiny point objects in the process as the breezies attack’
>Why is this telling you stuff that you already know? You need to know things that you don’t know!
>Throwing the pages to a random section your eyes fall upon the chapter title
>Migrations
>’Migrations are known to occur through the summer along the entire eastern coast of Equestria, often skirting around several major port cities along the way. These migrations are often conducted in waves, which are set typically a couple weeks apart from each other, their purpose to pick up any stragglers that fell behind on earlier travels’
>>25875912
So all we have to do is find out when the next one happens and get them out of our hair.
>>25875912
Does it say in there when these happen? Like dates?
>>25875912
do breezies have traditional routes? who could we talk to about getting the breezies out there safely?
remember we cant just let them fly out to the country, wouldnt be safe.
