Would you visit a pony strip club?
Would they start naked and then put on clothes suggestively?
>>27761839
My answers in order
>Yes
>Who cares?
>>27761839
H-How much for... a boop job?
>>27761839
Probably at least once, if only to see how it worked.
>>27761890
Dude, those are illegal!
Im rushing there
>>27761839
>A pony strip club opens in your town
>Most people who go in are just checking it out like it's some freak sideshow attraction
>You're the only regular customer
>The mares take notice
>They learn what you like and start treating you extra special
>>27762783So they're just doing there jobs like real strippers?
>>27762801
Yeah. But you're one of the few who's actually there for the mares, not the novelty.
>>27762783
>They actually get so comfortable with you, they start treating you like a friend
>"Hey, Anon. What's up? You look bummed out."
>Rainbow gives you a curious look while hanging upside down on the stripper pole by her hind legs.
"Nothing, Rainbow. I'm fine."
>She slides down from the pole, scooting her self on her behind towards you.
>She's sitting on the edge of the catwalk, leaning back, with her hind legs extended toward you, obscuring her face.
>She spreads them, revealing her panties that looked almost too tight for her.
>"You haven't said anything since you've been here, and you're on your fifth drink."
>You hope you don't regret this.
"So, you know that mare I mentioned? She turned me down."
>Rainbow flies over, bringing her butt to your face.
>She wraps her tail around your neck.
>"Oh please, Anon. That's no reason to be upset. Lots of mares are going to say no. You just gotta keep trying!"
>She starts shaking her butt, making her panties brush up against your nose.
"It's not just that. I overheard her talking to another mare. They were talking about me."
>"Uh oh."
>She turns around in midair.
"They didn't have a lot of nice things to say. They called me a creep, a loser, lot's of things."
>She thrusts her hips back and forth.
>"Well that's not very nice."
>She floats down so that she's eye level with you.
>She has a grin on her face.
>"Hey, how about I let you sniff my crotch for free?"
"I don't know, Dash. I don't really feel in the mood for that. I just feel like everything I do is creepy."
>"Hey, if I thought you were creepy, would I let you bury your face in my crotch?"
"I guess not. You know what, I think I'll do it."
>"That's the spirit!"
>She hovers up and turns around, tail raised.
>You grab her flanks, and stick your face between her butt cheeks, taking a deep whiff of her musk seeping through her panties.
>"Better?"
>You give a muffled response.
"Yeah, a little."
>>27763164
lmao
>>27761839
Yeah... P-put the socks on next...
>>27763164
>getting friendzoned by strippers
ouch
>>27761839
I feel like I would spend my entire paycheck in there. My dream is to date a pony stripper.
>>27762355
Fucking savage
>>27761890
Arrested for hopping without consent.
>"you'd love to see me slip these on wouldn't you?"
>>27761839
>Put on clothes suggestively
My peepers are now in interest.
>>27763164
>yummy Stripperbow crotch-musk
I like where this is going--continue, pl0x?
>>27761839
i would spend the few money i've left in my pocket in there
>>27763164
>bellybuttons on ponies
Makes me want to fuck Dash raw tbqhwy
>>27763164
>"Hey, if I thought you were creepy, would I let you bury your face in my crotch?"
and now i have to fap again! fac u anon! Fac u!
>>27762783
>>27763164
My penis and I require more, good sir.
>>27763164
Bump for interest.
interested bump
>>27763164
this is aggressively silly
more please
>>27762783
If they aren't getting many customers, how would they keep it running?
Unless Anon is extremely rich, he wouldn't be able to keep it afloat single-handedly.
>>27763164
I can't really see Rainbow Dash working as a stripper. If any of the mane6 would be there at all it would be Fluttershy, since she doesn't appear to have a real job.
>>27763558
Uh, that's the point of a stripper.
If you treat them as anything more than a friend you're doing it wrong.
I like the idea of a Tack Up club. Since they're naked all the time it seems fitting that they put on fancy saddles and brush each other and shit and they somehow find it errotic.
>>27767039
>UNTZ UNTZ UNTZ UNTZ
>The music picks up and the DJ comes on the speaker
>"Gentlemen! Get ready for our newest attraction! She's the pony of pop-quiz, the sally of systemic swing, the mauve to your helical groove - introducing, The Gravity Mare!"
>The fuck kind of stripper name is that?
>A sexy little number trots onto the stage, lavender with a dark blue mane tied into a bun, wearing lacy stockings, a button up blouse and sharp reading glasses
>Undoing the tie and shaking her head, the mane comes loose slightly messily
>"You've all been very naughty, my little ponies. It's time to stay after class for some remedial lessons."
>Ah, the sexy teacher type
>Immediately you notice the pole glow as she picks herself up with her magic
>Holy fuck, she's floating in mid air
>You watch as she twirls, spins, flips and grinds on the area around the pole
>Orbiting it like a satellite would a planet
>A floating strip shows, would'ja look at that
>The ceiling is alight in stars and constellations and she spreads, turns and writhes through the room
>Floating tantalizingly above the heads of the patrons
>She slips her panties off of one leg and lets them fall into a customer's drink
>That's the happiest fucker you've ever seen
>Oh god, he's drinking it
>She arcs her back and starts moaning in time with the music, reaching a crescendo
>If you didn't know any better, you'd think she had an orgasm up there
>Maybe she did, place smells strongly of musk and you doubt it's from the normal fare
>She comes back down from her high (carlos.jpg) and lands on stage breathlessly
>The room is silent
>And then
>Cheers and bits, everywhere
>You watch as what must be the Canterlot treasury is emptied from pockets and tossed on stage
>God damn
>Learning is fucking hot!
>>27767175
>put on fancy saddles and brush each other
Why am I getting so sweaty?
>>27767201
>their faces get closer
>closer
>oh god you're gonna have a heart attack
>theytouch muzzles
>boop
>AHHHH, ESKIMO KISSES
buuuump
>>27767175
put horse shoe on head
>>27761839
Yes
And since they normally don't wear clothes and walk around with their pussies/asses exposed anyway they'll start naked
>>27761839
Dressage is erotic anti-stripping in Equestria.
>>27763164
why would you write this and then not continue it?
you have to fuck the horse now anon
>"And who's that?"
>"Hmm? Oh that's Anonymous. He's one of our regulars. He likes to come nearly every Thursday night and he'll sometimes order a couple of drinks for his favorite dancers. He's such a cutie.
>"Really?"
>"Uh-huh. Right now he's a bit down in the dumps because he got rejected by some cunt up in the north district."
>"Hmm, maybe I could be of help?"
>"Say, that's a great idea! Go say hi to him, he's really friendly."
>"Okie then, but wait."
>"What's wrong?"
>"You said he's a regular, right? Do you know what are his kinks by any chance? Maybe I can cheer him up."
>"You know, nopony really knows. We were hoping you could try to find out for us."
>"Alrighty then."
>>27763164
I had a giggle m8
>>27767101
Well, obviously it's just a front. Not sure for what yet. Maybe they're smugglingsaltto Equestria.
Also, this guy is the owner.
>>27768511
go ahead
>>27768511
Aaaaaaaand?
>>27768511
OH SHIT NIGGER IT'S SLUTTERSHY
Can this be standard attire for the waitresses at the club?
>"Here are your drinks sir."
>>27768511
Please this.
>>27769241
>>27769293
must be
bunny is a classic. also, the OC is cute
>>27768511
moar
>>27769293
sure why not
>>27767106
>she doesn't run an animal shelter
ok
>>27768450
this
FUCK HER RIGHT IN THE PUSSY
>>27771060
Running an animal shelter for wild animals isn't going to pay her bills.
>>27767175
I would watch that. I would watch that hard.
>>27771225
>I would watch that hard.
carlos.jpg
>>27767240
unf~
more like this, pls
>>27761839
I'd perform at one for mares, let them get as hooves-on as they want, and donate all my wages to a mare-centric charity.
>>27771787
>the Milky Way Teat Cancer Foundation
>>27772935
I <3 TEATS
Truly a worthy cause.
>>27771787
Do you think they'd like you? Or would they just be there because you're an exotic novelty? Would they think it's sweet that you donate your funds to mare charities or would they just think you're some pathetic mare worshiping cuddleslut?
>>27773005
but anon, I AM a mare worshiping cuddleslut
>>27773005
Not sure on the first question.
For the latter: I am a mare-worshipper, so that'd be accurate. Whether or not they find it pathetic, I couldn't say.
>>27773045
>>27773061
Ma nigguhs
>>27773094
>>27773061
>>27773045
>stripping thread abruptly becomes mare-worship thread
I'm okay with this.
>>27768511
CONTINUE THE FUCKING STORY DAMNIT!!!!!
>>27762783
>>27763164
>>27767175
>>27767199
>>27767240
>>27768511
>>27768511
...Pretty sure his kink's gotta be mare worship now.
>>27773707
Probably going to have a fart fetish because of the way he's been inhaling that "musk"
>>27773734
Or he just wants to talk to someone.
Like the people who hire prostitutes just to talk to them,
I read a HiE story where the human character goes to an Equestrian strip club, the dancers were dressed in thongs, bras and in addition to the usual stuff they were also wearing saddles, bridles, and blinders.
So i guess anything a horse would wear could be considered kinky by pony standards.
>>27773758
>>27773707
These two plz.
>>27773876
don't forget fart fetish.I will know if you do
page 9 bump, there's gotta be more pics and green
Only ponies I can't really see as strippers would be Twalot and Rarara.
Don't know what Twilight's excuse would be for not stripping, but Raritymoonlights as a professional Dominatrix, clearly.
keep it alive
>>27775299
Im sure Pinkie Pie would be a burlesque dancer, but not full-on stripper. She'd of course do the balloon popper dance https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4q4_UM2bC3c
Fleur De Lis would have started out as a stripper, before getting a modeling gig that paid off.
Im not sure on any more ponies that would do the pole.
Maybe Flitter and Cloudchaser.
>>27761890
>>27762355
I'll take my chances
Yes. I think they'd just prance around being erotic.
>>27775922
Trixie would be the best stripper
Boop
>>27776639
Nothing better from an angry lap dance from a mare that secretly enjoys it.
Who got the sevens?
Are bars canon yet?
>>27768511
>Anon is friends with the girls at the strip joint
>Never makes any moves or says anything crude to them
>They comment on how nice he is
>One offers to take his virginity
>He declines
>Comes back next week to find that the pony who offered to take his virginity was arrested for prostitution
Vaguely obscure reference bump.
>>27777493
The Saltlick in Appleloosa. And im sure theres been some in the background of some manehattan episode.
It depends on the species. Frankly a flying horse strip club is just a ridiculous idea.
>>27761839
Trotley Crue and those MARES, MARES, MARES
>>27777540
Is he undercover?
>>27777559
No, he's stoned though. Her name was Gemini.
>>27777540
I think I recall seeing some story like that.
>>27777547
Anon. Flying lapdances. Booty that defies gravity. Think of the possibilities.
>>27777607
It's just wrong though
Horse tack is pretty bonerific though.
>>27777627
How so? From a moral perspective? Or do you have a phobia of birds?
>>27777663
Nah, birds are alright
Whatever the case I'd visit one in disguise.
Deer GET
>>27761839
>Be strippone
>Start dancing naked
>Proceed to shave all fur
>>27777584
>>27777575
>>27777559
It's a game grumps reference. Dan Avidan = Anon. He told the story during the katamari damacy playthrough.
>>27777802
You tried
>>27779239
It was a good attempt.
>>27775922
>"So why'd you leave Ponyville?"
>The blue mare with the cyan mane gyrates her ass in front of your face for a few moments before answering.
>"I was involved in a magic scam that went bad."
>"Well its a good thing it did because I think you've found your true calling."
>She blushes slightly and manages to look simultaneously angry and pleased.
>Reaching into your pocket you pull out a 10 bit coin and hold it out to her.
>Holding onto the pole with one foreleg and one hindleg, she bends over backwards and plucks the coin from your fingers with her teeth.
>Using her magic, she floats the coin from her mouth into her tip jar, as she sucks your still outstretched fingers, flicking them with her tongue, and gently biting the tip before straightening back up and continuing her dance.
>"I'm glad you like Trixie's moves" she says, winking at you.
>>27780237
>>27761839
i reckon most of it would be body language. lifting up rumps, raising tails, getting that cooch right up in your face. winking clit in time with the music, dripping a lot, that kinda thing
>>27777808
>smooth shaved pones
why has this never been more of a thing? i guess because of the ambiguity in what skin colors technicolor horses are meant to have under their fur
>>27777777
so what was it?
>>27780673
well those are certainly all good ideas
I have this huge fantasy of having a super slutty girlfriend who's a stripper, one who dresses like a complete whore even when she's not working. I want one that could have stopped stripping long ago and does it because it makes her feel powerful. Twilight would be perfect for that. Maybe I should green...
>>27771092
Our government in real life pays for similar services, though. Some companies as well, though I don't think Fluttershy would like their goals very much. My headcanon was always that Fluttershy is a very minor government employee.
>>27780845
>I want a slutty stripper gf
Will she take your balls to 'work' in her purse or let you retain some ownership of them.
>>27780690
A picture of Glimmer with the get on her face. Underwhelming.
>>27780680
Have you seen a horse with mange? That's why.
>>27780862
Well, I'm a dom and very much prefer sexually submissive women. Ideally she would be a humiliation-loving pervert who's primary motivation for behaving the way she does is that she gets off on being looked down upon as a "whore". Even subs I have been very rough with say it brings them this feeling of euphoria and power. Paradoxical, seemingly, but then again so is wanting to be assfucked while your partner forces you to drink like a dog from the toilet in your father's private bathroom. I do care what gets her off, but, I don't care why.
So, no, when I have my little stripper fantasy I don't think of her as an SJW bitch who'd cuck me. Why do people think that's so common, anyway? I've met more men who openly admit to wanting girls to drink their piss than I have cucks.
>>27781110
>Why do people think that's so common, anyway?
https://archive.is/3PhxQ
https://twitter.com/annelirufus/status/406497202689691649
As if there were any doubt.
>>27768511
>"Hey there handsome, what brings you here today~?"
Hello. I haven't seen you here before, you're one of the new dancers?
>"Why yes I am. You're name is Anonymous, correct?"
Yes.
>"May I ask what's with the sad look on your face?"
Aw, it's... Nothing. I'm just not feeling...
>"She said no?"
>Nod.
To be honest (pham) I don't know why I came here tonight, I thought I could at least pay a visit to some of the lovely mares here.
>"Well, where are they?"
I don't know. It seems they've decided to take a day off or something. I guess I should too as well-
>You felt a hoof land on your hand before getting up.
>"Well, I'm here. How's about I treat ya to a dance or two?"
I'm not sure...
>"Come on, it'll be fun I promise!"
Okay then.
>The two of you head towards one of the private booths, a bouncer gives you a friendly reminder not to touch the pony before heading in alone.
>>27782210
Finally, someone continued this greentext,
Keep the pony eroticism flowing, this is a concept that could be great for green.
bermp
>>27780680
>>27782575
I am genuinely, truly saddened that anyone could look at this jpeg without feeling envy, arousal, or both. The human pursuit of short term comfort has come at the expense of castrating our capacity for enjoyment from our hearts. There is no justification. It is a self-imposed tragedy.
>>27781967
Hm, it just doesn't seem common. I am noticing what is that a BIG aspect of this "cuck" shit is that it plays on the feelings of normal people. Being upset on their behalf is exactly what they want, at some level the fetish is exhibitionist - after all what meaning do these distinctions have if not in the eyes of society? If humiliation is the point of a particular fetish it seems like inevitably that fetish will expand to include strangers. The first step for "cuck" is for the female to wear a key to a cock-cage on her neck, knowing that certain other people know what that means. Anyway, it still seems like the guy has to be a sub to begin with, it's just some irritating twist on their usual shit. I mean, the only sub guy I know is a little indian dude who's like 5'2 and wants amazon women to snoo-snoo him to death but...he'd still be mad if he got cheated on.
>>27777802
I'm coming across this image in this thread...while having a piece of venison jerky.
>>27780237
This needs more attention
Given that regular pony names would probably be right at home in a strip club, would the mares employ exotic names like Jane Doe, Emily, or Ted?
bamb
>>27783842
Is it tasty?
Bump
