You have been hired to assassinate Twilight Sparkle. You have already been paid. Your mission must be completed or you will be the one killed. How would you kill her?
>>27690305
with mydick
>>27690305
>white background
>thumbnail
delete /b/ threads
>>27690305
>Your mission must be completed or you will be the one killed.
You don't fuck with paid killers, what's stopping me from assassinating the customer instead?
>>27690329
>delete /b/ threads
how about if we just delete your crybaby post
what's wrong anon, are you sad that twilight is dead? the bitch deserved it. in fact i can not wait for that stuck up cunt rarity to get hers next
>>27690305
I would knock on her door, hand her ye old cartoon wick bomb and leave.
>>27690305
Give her so many orgasms she dies from dehydration
>>27690345
what is to stop the customer from dodging your assassination attempt and having you killed then hiring someone more professional to do what you were supposed to do
look the fact of the matter is you have been hired to kill twilight sparkle and the client does not care how you do it. you just need to do it. pony deaths are not something to cry over. animals die every day. it is just that this bitch will probably be dying with a bullet through her head
>>27690361
Maybe don't make such awful thoughtless shitass threads then, OP.
>>27690397
awful? thoughtless?
you are clearly a pussy.
but since you are on this board that is not a surprise.
why don't you leave the killing of animals to those of us who have the scrote to do it.
and stay away from all hamburgers you stup9id vegan cunt
poisoned books
>>27690423
xddddd
>>27690305
OP, are you Thrackerzod?
>>27690425
In all honesty, this one would probably work.
>Ricin on the pages
rip Twiggles
>>27690462
poisoning her might work
but it would have to happen quickly
maybe put some cyanide in her tea or something
>>27690437
a-b-c-d-e-f-g-h-i-j-k-l-m-n-o-p-q-r-s-t-u-v-w-x-y-z
>>27690305
Boop her repeatedly.With my fist.
>>27690305
I would have her fake her death, acting like I carried out my paid obligation, and then assassinate the shitbrain who paid me to assassinate muh twiggles.
fite me OP
>>27690553
but what if the shitbrain who paid you was celestia
what do
>>27690570
Call luna to assassinate celestia
>>27690598
you are delusional anon
luna could not kill celestia
it would be a draw
both of them panting on the ground
each of them with at least one broken leg
and probably bleeding from several cuts
they would lay there sweating and with a fast heart beat
and suddenly realize that they would be too evenly matched to kill the other
why don't you think these things through before you post you stupid fadget
>>27690305
Sniper rifle
Strychnine
High explosives
Cyanide
Fill her room with poison gas while she sleeps
Strategic weapons on her general area
A knife
Just any gun really
Brick to the skull
I mean, how would you kill anyone?
I would try to convince her to kill herself.
>>27690305
Hire Sunset and Starlight
>>27690657
you probably wouldn't have to pay them that much either.
>>27690656
i know how you could do that, anon. just show her this board with all the faggotry and she would become so depressed that she would use her magic to make herself implode into another dimension. thereby satisfying your contract to kill her and ridding the world of equestria of her once and for all.
>poison
>magic can probably heal literal anything (maybe not)
>no information about poisons and antidotes
>gathering information about deadly poisons will attract suspicion
bad idea
assassination is done quickly, stealthily or not
this should be an ambush or attack of opportunity
done close range cuz missing the target and alerting everyone is not an option
escape by using confusion or the night
three options, all of them are suicide attacks
bum rush through everything, relying on confusion to deliver swift lethal attack
ambush with a couple of hired highwayfolk
or good ol betrayal, with gaining her trust and literally stabbing in the back
>>27690613
>and suddenly realize that they would be too evenly matched to kill the other
and then you come out and slit her throat
>>27690629
you have no access to that
you are in equestria, you dumb fuck
>>27690513
>"Mmm, smells like almonds!"
"Yes, it is my new almond blend."
>>27690708
>you have no access to that
>you are in equestria, you dumb fuck
Knife, what are kitchens?
Brick, what are buildings?
>>27690941
Sword in your stomach, what are guards?
>>27690305
>Kill who hires me with my Magnum
>rape body
>take money
>>27690305
At the right moment, throw a flashbang inside whatever room she is, then rush in with my knife, shove it up her throat and run away before anyone can recover.
>>27691394
Fuckin' Seal Team 6 right here.
>>27691394
The problem is getting away quickly. There would be a lot of pony witnesses, probably including that yapping bitch Pinkie Pie. So you might have to come back later and kill her too.
>>27690629
I like the way that you think
but couldn't you do it all at once
For example, poison her food with strychnine and then getting a bead on her with a sniper rifle through a window. But instead of shooting her, you shoot the high explosives you hid underneath the table. While you are lining up your shot, a poisonous gas is filling the room courtesy of the gas you are pumping in from the back of the house. Finally, after you take your shot, and the explosives blow up the house, you quickly run in through the smoke and flames, using thermal infrared equipment, and stab whoever or whatever is left with a knife. Then shoot the remains with a gun and use a brick to crush anything that looks like bone. If you did this quickly enough, and planned it out correctly, you could use everything on your list, and still get the job done, all while looking like a total badass.
>>27690708
gathering information about deadly poisons that could kill a pony would not attract attention if you claimed you were doing it as research
assassination should be done quickly, yes, but this is twilight goddamned sparkle, so you should try to make her suffer if possible. maybe you could set her house on fire, and while she is trying to escape, you could run in, but instead of helping her, crush her skull with a brick or shoot her in the face, and then later it would look like she simply died from smoke inhalation.
>>27692269
Yes, because we all know fires cause bullet wounds.
>>27690305
Sit on her head and fart.
>>27690657
Could Twilight take them on?
>>27691071
>what are guards?
Glorified toys for the princesses?
>>27690380
Good ole Slade Wilson m8.
>>27690305
"Hey Twilight, some faggot tried to hire me to kill you. He said if I don't he'll kill me instead."
[DBZ sounds intensify]
