>You are now aware that Cadence qualifies for MILF status
>>27215378
She's still worst princess, so it doesn't even matter.
There are far better Milfs and even cougars out there.
>>27215378
No, because for that I'd have to want to fuck her.
And I really, REALLY don't.
>>27215378
>implying that changes anything
Would still fug
>>27215378
>implying she's fuck worthy
>>27215378
I was already aware of that. It caused my penis to harden.
>>27215378
Only the M part is accurate. The rest is bullshit.
>>27215378
no, milfs have to be actually fuckable
shinny its a total dilf tho
>>27215378
GILF >>>>>> MILF
>>27215877
>>27215821
This to be honest shaking my head family
>>27215887
>She's no longer a MILF, she's now a GILF
Well, fuck. That didn't occur to me until now.
>>27215887
Is there any good melancholy fanfic set from the perspective of Twilights parents as she grows up and they see all her accomplishments?
>>27215955
Well, she's still a MILF, but also a GILF.
>>27215378
>>27215803
faggot
>>27215982
Not a very meaningful fact since all GILFs are technically also MILFs.
>>27215378
>implying i wasn't aware of that months before S6 was even announced.Doesn't change a damn thing, i would cuck Shining Plothole so hard, fucking retard doesn't even deserve such a tight ass.
>>27215378
Former mother I'd like to fuck, if pic related had anything to say about it.
>>27215378
>After her pregnancy Cadance begins to loose her thin, model-esque figure and starts gaining some really voluptuous curves.
>Shining Armor looses interest in her because he only like thin, waif-like mares.
>Cadance walks around with a plush rump that gives all her male subjects pause.
>Rumors get around that the prince has lost interest in his wife.
>The guards all think their prince is an idiot.
>>27215378
And now stories about cucking Shining are going on the whole new level.
>tfw Flurry is actually Anon's daughter
>>27216478
>>27218886
>cucking your bro
>not getting the Shiny-Cadence combo meal
>>27215378
If the education system couldn't make me aware of anything, what makes you think you could?
>>27218854
>"So where was I?" asks the guardpony, a veteran of many years and one who delighted in knowing all the goings on in the palace
>From who had stolen a few coins from the castle lockbox to the bedroom antics of their beloved rulers themselves; anything that went on in the palace made it to this stallion's ears
>His junior, a new recruit who doubted much of what his partner said leans on his spear and sighs
>"You were saying that the captain was having bedroom troubles" he corrects his partner
>"Oh yeah thas' right" says the stallion "Anyway so I'm doing my nightly patrol as per usual. Ended up outside their bedroom at one point, see?"
>His younger partner nods wearily
>He doubted the stallion just 'happened' to end up outside their rulers' bedroom
>He was probably eavesdropping as usual
>"Now I'm no clutz" he continues "But I dropped my spear just by their door. And as I go to pick it up I hear the captain speaking on the other side"
>The junior's ears perk up and, despite himself he finds his interest in the story growing
>The older stallion notices this and continues his story with relish
>"Now I know you've done guard duty outside their apartment before; probably heard them goin' at it eh?"
>The younger stallion's cheeks flush
>Well of course he had. Every member of the guard had at some point
>But he didn't have to SAY it
>"Ah what am I sayin' of course ya have. Heck, they go at it every night. Princess o' Love and all"
>"But anyway" he shakes his head "This night I hear the captain apologizen'"
>"Apologizing?" asks the younger stallion "For what?"
>"I didn't her for what, but next thing I hear is hoofsteps comin' towards me, so I duck away from that door quick-smart and behind a corner"
>The stallion's story is interrupted by the sound of a pony approaching and the two guards assume their places by the entrance as a courtier passes by them, smiling politely
>They wait for a moment as the courtier disappears within the confines of the castle
>>27218854
Bullshit.
We all know the reason why they can't have sex anymore
>>27215971
This is a really good idea. Would read.
>>27218980
>>27218902
>you will never fuck Shining in his loose ponut while Cadance eat out your asshole
>>27218980
>IT IS DONE.
Usually, the whole "ridiculous talk with le funny faces" isn't my kind of humor, but this was pretty funny
>>27216128
only if their children are still alive.
>>27218970
>"So I pretend to be makin' myself busy" continues the older guardpony "When the princess herself comes out and greets me"
>The rookie stares intently at his partner; thoroughly perplexed
>All guardponies of the palace loves their princess, but it was rare that she would ever interact with them on a personal level
>The older guard notes his partner's confused expression and nodded in agreement
>"I was shocked too. Snot' often the princess talks to us after all"
>"So what did she talk about?" asks the rookie
>His partner opens his mouth and lets out a hacking cough
>The younger of the two waits patiently as his partner's fit takes several minutes
>"She asks me if I have a wife and if I pleasure her"
>The rookie's eyes bulge
>"She said THAT?" he asks, astonished
>"Oh aye" nods his partner "So I say 'Yes I do ma'm, and then-"
>He begins to laugh despite himself and apologizes in between his giggles before collecting himself
>"And then the princess turns back in the direction of the room and yells 'Ya hear that Shiny? He can do it!'"
>The stallion erupts into raucous laughter and his junior couldn't help but smile deviously
>He felt guilty for thinking poorly of the captain, but he simply couldn't imagine how somepony could not want to lie with the princess of Love
>Sure the princess was attractive before having the baby, but now?
>She'd put on a bit of weight in just the right places, adding to her lithe figure feminine curves that any mare would kill for
>At least, that's what most of the guard agreed upon
>And they discussed these things in detail
>Once again the two of them hear another pony approaching and assume their places
>This time they both struggle to maintain their composure, however, as Shining Armor himself turns the corner
>>27219021
>you will never be 'uncle' anon to their kid (s) (they'd probably have more)
>have to be increasingly careful about your threesomes as they grow older.
>Eventually they'd figure it out and probably not care or maybe have known all along.
>you'll never live happily ever after in your threeway relationship.
Why do I even live upon this planet?
>>27219053
"Stallions" Shining Armor rasps and sloppily salutes the two guardponies
>The younger of the two observed his captain and what he saw convinced him of his partner's story
>Their captain looked, well, like shit
>His eyes were bloodshot, his mane frazzled and his muzzle looked as though it hadn't been shaved in weeks
>They both return the salute and their captain continues past them
>The two of them stand upright in silence for several minutes, not wanting their captain to come back and catch them unawares
>Finally after a few moments the younger guard speaks up
>"Do you think the captain pedicures his hooves?" he asks
>The older stallion looks at his partner and furrows his brow
>"It's just" he continues "He's probably using them pretty damn often now"
>The two of stand silent for a moment before bursting into laughter, the older stallion dragging his partner into a headlock and rubbing his head profusely
Maybe if she kept the baby weight
>she will never be in 24/7 mom mode and accidentally call you 'sweetums' without noticing
>>27219699
Even if she didn't mean it, that would still brighten the shit out of my day
>>27218980
>>27219004
This.... I have no idea what to say about this.
>>27219699
I like the idea of a comfy, cute green with Cadence's motherliness rubbing off onto other aspects of her life and general motherhood issues
>Calls Anon 'sweetums' without noticing
>Insists on tucking him in every night
>Meanwhile Shining becomes incredibly protective of the entire family; Anon included
>Follows him everywhere, even to the bathroom
>Celestia and Luna constantly find excuses to visit and fawn over FH
>Seeing Cadence have a child sets awakens their own latent biological clocks and they become incredibly flirtatious
>Shining and Cadence are so exhausted that Anon has to take over more and more of their duties
>Eventually gets of tired of this and offers to look after Flurry
>Turns out to be surprisingly good at it
>Three of them come to a compromise with the married couple shouldering their state duties again in exchange for Anon looking after Flurry on a semi-regular basis
