>"Anonymous, I know of your deep-seated hatred for the Alicorn race."
>"I know all about your hate of Flurry Heart and your desire for Twilight to lose her wings."
>"I can't undo these two things, but I have arranged for a mission that will hopefully vent your frustrations."
>"You see, a long time ago, 500 years since Nightmare Moon had been banished, to be exact, something happened that I could not anticipate."
>"Nightmare Moon came back early."
>"I was not properly prepared for her reform, so I had to make a panic decision to put her back in the moon."
>"I made a small army of Alicorns to fend against her and defend Canterlot while I scrambled to retrieve the Elements of Harmony."
>"After Nightmare Moon was trapped for another 500 years, I ordered the alicorn army to relinquish their added wings and/or horns."
>"They much liked me, so most of them complied."
>"...except one. His name is unknown, and he escaped the guard those 500 years ago, and he still roams the land."
>"He is not a good pony, Anon, know how I can tell? He revels in infidelity."
>"This stallion alicorn is the true father of Pumpkin Cake and Pound Cake, and I know you were also one of the only ones to question their races."
>"Well, you were right, but I haven't the heart to tell them."
>"He wiped Cup Cake's mind of the incident after it occurred."
>"That isn't the worst of it, though."
>"Anon, a new alicorn cannot be birthed unless both parents are also alicorns."
>"Ancient texts have disproved such a thing with thorough analysis."
>"The fugitive is also Flurry Heart's father."
>"With this, he's gone too far, and he's legally now able to be convicted for treason."
>"Anon, I want you to find him and bring him to justice."
>"But, you also have my permission to kill him, if you are able, since he is to be executed anyway."
>"You get to kill an alicorn that does not deserve to be, and I get to remove another, more subtle threat to the stability of Equestria."
>"Do you accept?"
ok
>>26801982
Do I get to rut you afterwards?
nah, girl, i'd rather smoke weed
>>26801982
WILL YOU GIVE ME A NEW BODY IF I DO?!
>>26801982
From what you've told me, this guy really seems to like impregnating mares.
I think I have a plan. You must turn me into an alicorn mare. Then I'll be able to lure him into a trap and after he's grown weary from rutting, I'll spring my trap and capture him.
I know it's risky, but it's a chance I'm willing to take.
>>26802264
Two words for you
Vagina Dentata
>>26801982
Celestia we don't hate alicorns, we just hate product placement 'princesses'
I don't care about alicorns as a race. I hate alicorn royalty. Celestia can so her dirty work herself, fuck her.
>>26801982
>"Do you accept?"
"You say you know of my distaste for two alicorns already, yet you also give me permission to kill this traitor."
>"What is the problem? This is what you want, is it not?"
"Would you also impose limits on how I am to carry out this murder?"
>"What do you-"
"Does it have to be clean?"
>Her eyes widen and she grimaces
>"You disgust me, but do what you must."
>She looks away when a sadistic smile comes to your face
"I am going to need a bone saw-"
>"I don't wish to hear of your 'needs', Anonymous. Anything you require you may take from the armory, or ask a servant to fetch for you. If that is all, you may leave me now."
"Yes, princess."
>"And Anonymous, don't make me regret this."
"Yes... princess."
>>26801982
Oh!
So now you want me to be yours errand boy, huh?!
Go fuck yourself.
You think that I, in my unlimited hatred, am going to make you a favor?
No.
I hope this fucker, whoever he is, will find you and rape you so hard your teeth will fly out of your manipulative maw, you whorse.
And no problems with new alicorn foals too, your cunt is more barren and dry than fucking desert!
Impale yourself on a pike, bitch.
>>26801982
>Implying I hate Flurry Heart
I want to waifu her actually
>>26801982
>There's a fucking male alicorn now
>>26801982
"I don't know where you got the idea I hate alicorns from."
"If all this guy does is sleep with the wives of some cucks, then I don't see-"
>"Your 'waifu' may be next."
"I'LL PAINT MY HOUSE WITH THE FUCKER'S BRAINS!"
"...how do you know what a 'waifu' is?"
>"...uh..."
>>26801982
>You get to kill an alicorn that does not deserve to be
Yeah, but I could do that by killing Twalot, Candyass, or Furry Heat, too, and they sound like much easier targets.
>>26802462
Neato
>>26802462
MOAR!!
>>26801982
>Celestia summons an Alicorn-hating Anon to Equestria to do the deed.
>Not just because of his hatred, but also because he's 'a skilled assassin'.
>Anon's 30 confirmed kills are all woodland critters; he's a hunter.
>He hangs a salt lick in the everfree, climbs the nearest tree with his great-grandpa's .30-06, and waits.
>not just fuck and dump
>>26802982
>Twilight
>Easy target
Don't be stupid, Anon.
You're dealing with a sapient superweapon.
>>26801982
of course its a male she wants dead
what a surprise
>>26803155
>Unsort her library on one of your visits
>Offer to help her clean up since Spike always does it
>Tell him to go hang out with Rarity while you help Twilight sort the mess
>When her back's turned and she's distracted with idle chit-chat while figuring out how to re-sort her shit, do what you must
>>26803337
[/spoiler]>Rape?[/spoiler]
>>26801982
Is he by any chance Lord Anders?
>>26801982
Wew lass
>>26801982
>I'll do it butt....
>I need a few things.
>Don't ask why.
>I will need a 5ft dildo and lots of razors.
>The less anyone knows the better.
>>26801982
That's a good and well thought out prompt. Good job, OP.
>>26801982
Can I fuck your sister afterwards?
>>26804015
Why?
>Its going up his ass.
>That's how I will kill him.
>>26804417
Something your not telling me anon?
>Yeah
What?
>I already know where he is.
>I think you should get some popcorn too.
>then meet me at my place by noon tomorrow
Why do you need popcorn?
>What else do you eat while watching something entertaining?
>>26801982
bump
a-nuu chiki briki i b damke
>>26802462
You can't end it there.
>>26805880
yeah
>>26801982
I think anon would team up with this guy and maybe discord and take over equestria
>>26801982
>you can kill this Alicorn because he refused to remain a mere cog in my machine of destiny
Sorry, Celestia, I'm more inclined to side with this guy than to aid your cause, especially if it sows further seeds of ruin and dissent against your kind. Why not have your most active little toy Twilight solve the matter?
>>26803099
>Anon's 30 confirmed kills are all woodland critters; he's a hunter.
>Not Anon's300 plus confirmed kills, numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and training in guerrilla warfare.
>>26806691
Anon never received training in guerrilla warfare, silly! He received training in gorilla warfare.
>>26801982
>Anon Wick in Equestria
>"Anonymous, I know you were the most skilled assassin on your world. They called you the...'baba yaga.'"
"It's not for sale."
>"Considering how significantly more barbaric and ferocious your people are than my little ponies, that speaks volumes about your abilities. I'm giving you this chance to unleash yourself upon the world, Anonymous. Take up arms once again. I don't care what you do or how you do it so long as this alicorn goes down."
"Everything has a price."
>"So you're saying you'll do it?"
"Yeah, I'm thinking I'm back."
>"Wonderful. I'm glad we could do business like civilized ponies."
"DO I LOOK CIVILIZED TO YOU?!"
>>26806774
>The alicorn decides to cut through a play-ground.
>Little did he know, Anon trained for years in gorilla warfare, and was a mad monkey-bars master.
>With M60 in one hand and the other gripped firmly on a monkey bar, Anon fires his weapon with an accuracy unmatched.
>gif related.
>>26801982
You and everyone else does nothing but ignore me or dump on me all day and then you drop this shit on me, couldn't get a pony that you like to do this job, or you just don't want any of them to have to endure the act of correcting your mistake.
I'll do this for you, but after this I'm done. you'll never see either one of us again.
>>26801982
No you misunderstand I don't hate the allicorns as people I just hate that they exist.
Still I would be honered to bring this renagade to justice show me to the armory celestia.
>>26802683
kys
>>26801982
Ok, Ms Dulcinea , all for the most beatiful princess in the world ,now come Sancho
>m-my name is derpy anon
>>26802150
This. Bounty hunters need rewards.
>>26801982
>your deep-seated hatred for the Alicorn race.
Naah, I was just fuckin' with you. I'm cool with alicorns, brah.
>>26804587
Kek
