>"P-Please stop hating me, anon! I'll do anything! I promise!"
>>25970043
lil nigga i told you i don't hate you, but i ain't selling you no pot
aight, dat purple bitch will kill me
>>25970115
I can't decide if this is wasted potential or not.
>>25970115
unexpected chuckle / 10
>tyrone in eq
SHEEEEIIIIIIT
>>25970115
>Tyrone acts like a complete and utter , sterotypical nigga
>But hes nice in his own way.
>>25970043
I never hated you, little buddy.
It's your insufferable smartass cunt caretaker I hate.
>>25970043
Just be more like Nyx
>>25970530
No, Anon. He wants to be hated LESS.
>>25970539
Nyx is hated less.
>>25970544
Bullshit.
>>25970569
I actually like Nyx more than Spike unironically.Because at least her non-canon existence is more tolerable than your average Spike episodes.
>>25970569
>>25970599
See? I'm always right.
>>25970115
>"Please JAnon, all the other dragons are going to do it Saturday. I don't want that to be my first time doing it and have them think I'm not cool."
Hol' up, you sayin those sky niggas are goin' to be blazin' dis Saturday?
>"Well, yes, I..."
Whose supplyin' dos niggas, anyway? I woun't min' gettin' in on dat teritory.
>"I think some Griffin is selling it to them. If you sell me some weed, I'll try to get them to buy it from you."
Fuckin' bird cats always hustlin' in my hood. Aight lil nigga, Ima hook you up. But you gotta keep purple book bitch off my back an be sure to put in a good word fo' me.
>"Thanks JAnon! I won't let you down."
Aight, jus keep yo word.
>A few hours later at the Castle, Twilight is researching Equestrian history while JAnon is searching through Jewelery cabinet.
>"JAnon, this is fascinating. This tome gives a description of beings that sound a lot like you."
Yo, watcha' be talkin' 'bout now?
>"I'm saying that there were humans in Equestria thousands of years ago. It seems they once aided Celestia in various political conflict. Perhaps they were royalty."
Hol' up, you sayin that we wuz...
>"JAnon! Put that jewelery down and look at this. It says that your kind were royalty."
*puts jewelery in pocket*
Hol' up, you sayin' that we wuz kangs n'...
>Twilight lifts her nose to the air.
>"JAnon, do you smell that? It almost smells like..."
>Spike stumbles out of hallway, higher than a kite.
Oh shit, nigga!
>JAnon spontaneously begins to dance out of anxiety.
>Twilight's in shock, "Spike, are you high?!"
Should I continue?
>>25970894
Real niggas don't ask
I want to know what type of weed it is, banana? spaghetti?
>>25970894
The answer is yes, writefriend.
Continue.
You should always finish your greens, to grow up big and green.
bumping for great glory
>>25970894
>Spike laughs and awkwardly smiles, "No"
>His reddened eyes lazily look around the room
>"Oh hey JAnon." Spike giggles.
>Twilight is fuming
>"JAnon!"
>JAnon looks pensive.
...so you be sayin' we wuz kangs n sheeeeit?
>"JAnon, this is the fifth time this week! Stop selling Spike marijuana. The Princess is going to have my ass if she discovers that Spike is addicted to marijuana. She's coming over for dinner in two hours!"
Yo bitch you caint get addictd to weed. Its biloigly imposible. An' if that white bitch is gon' have an' say in dis, she can tell dis nigga right here.
>JAnon flamboyantly points to himself in the manner basketball-americans typically do.
>"No, bad idea. She'll send you to the moon."
>Spike shyly walks up to JAnon, "I'm sorry. I thought I could handle it."
Don' worry lil nigga. I cain handle whatva des bitches trow at me.
>He turns to Twilight
Aight, we'll jus' say dat he got allergies or sumthin'. Dis ain't gon' be hard
>"She'll never believe that. She's the wisest pony in all of Equestria. And Spike smells like marijuana."
K, we'll jus' say he got spreayed by a skunk. You makin' dis shit more difficult than it needs to be. And she' ain't dat wize. Afta all, she made yo incompenet ass the leada of frenship or sumthing. She a dumb bitch. You kno' it true.
>Twilight opened her mouth to object, but she pulled away. She put her hoof to her jaw to think about his proposal.
>She sighed, "It looks like you are right, JAnon. I don't see any other way out of this."
Righ' then, you cook the collad green' yet?
>"Umm, no. I didn't think to..."
What kina dinna dis gon be witout sum good ol' fashined soul food, huh? You said you wan' dis bitch to taste black cuisine. It don' get no blacker dan collard greens.
>"Yes, JAnon, I understand."
Good, les get dis party start'd.
>Twilight looked worried as JAnon scooted and boogied to the kitchen. She didn't know if this would work. And she didn't know why JAnon spoke broken English. Humans were weird.
>>25972323
More, double-23
>>25972323
>Twilight walked into the kitchen to help JAnon
>JAnon cooks the collard green, chicken, and waffle fries with such speed and efficiency that it leaves Twilight in awe
I see you din ge' de esentials. You even fo'got da chicken.
>"But I prepared fresh watermelon and..."
Oh why's you go' to assume dat I like watamellon, huh. Whatcho tryna say?
>"Oh, JAnon, I'm sorry. I didn't mean any disrespect. I was just trying to explain..."
Ayy, you aight purple thing. Im jus' fuckin' wit ya.
>Twilight thought back to her studies. Humans did enjoy sarcastic humor and...
>"Umm, JAnon, where did you get all of this food?"
I, uh, foun' it. Look, if an' one asks, I don' kno' shit about no missin' food.
>Human sure are resourceful, Twilight thought.
Aight, looks like evrythin' is in orda. Now, where's dat lil nigga?
>"Oh, he's still in the library. I think he's taking a nap on couch."
Hah, dat nigga 'bout had it. Hey, how long 'til da queen get here?
>"She'll be here in about half an hour. And she's a princess, not a queen, JAnon"
Aight, I kno' dat.
>JAnon didn't really know that. But he didn't want to appear unlearned in front of Twilight.
Well, da foo' is 'bout done. Whadya say we light one up before the princess ge' here?
>Before Twilight could say anything, JAnon pulled a blunt from out of thin air.
>Twilight was stunned, "How did you do that?"
Now dats some real black magic fo' ya.
>Twilight recovered to her senses.
>"JAnon, you can't do that here. The princess will be here in twenty minutes."
So?
>"She will have you arrested."
Oh shit, you fo' real? I don' want to deal wit' no police.
>JAnon throws the blunt out the window.
>"You can't throw it out there, somebody might see it."
I jus' can' please yo ass can I?
>JAnon climbs out the Window to get to the blunt.
>He snuffs the ember and stashes it in his "Gone to Soon" hoodie
>He spots some movement in the distance
Hey yo, purple, the princess is her'
>"Equestrian PD, freeze!!!"
Oh shit purps, hide the weed!
>>25974114
This shit is the best green not about horse fucking that I read in a while bonus points for capturing how ghetto black people are
Source:am black
>>25974114
I'm going to bed. If this thread is still alive tomorrow, I'll keep going.
Bump for JAnon
>>25974114
>Now dats some real black magic fo' ya
You know, was about to leave /mlp/. All these shit eqg threads, namefags, and non horsefuckers... but this green reminded me that there may still be hope.
Bamp
>>25974905
No you aren't black.
You are a nigger.
Only Obama and Will Smith are black people.
