PREVIOUSLY ON THE CRIMES AGAINST NATURE PROGRAM
>>25818407
>What is this thread about?
Half human and half pony/other Equestrian species offspring.
>What are the rules?
There are no thread specific rules, do what you want.
>What is the continuity (world/characters/attributes)?
Whatever you want it to be. Everything is a variable, there are no absolutes. Characters, names, genders, personalities, relationships, backgrounds, writing style, genre. If you want to know the common headcanons of certain characters, read some stories or ask the thread.
Searchable Archive:
http://anonpone.pineapplecomputing.com/search/?tags=satyr
Story by Parent:
http://pastebin.com/qFf46ep5 (embed)
Author List:
http://pastebin.com/RFgtrECq (embed)
Satyrs by Parent:
http://pastebin.com/uBqbm6eq (embed)
Dropbox
https://www.dropbox.com/sh/d94jlx7pgl5gg34/AABM4w-okI70GyrbCsVNee9Ga?dl=0
Need some proofing done? Or want to throw ideas around?
Add one of the Skypes below!
[NEEDS UPDATING]
>>25922632
Dawn, you're the daughter of the sun goddess. You will be a morning person AND YOU WILL LIKE IT!
>>25922779
She's also a child. I never knew a person in my life who was a morning person when they were a kid.
>>25922821
This makes me sad. When I was a kid, my friends and I all used to be up at the crack of dawn heading out on our bikes and exploring until it got dark. It used to be so much fun, playing war with BB guns and pretending conker husks were grenades. Even that time I was dared to go down "The 100 Footer" on my bike and ended up breaking my arm was great in retrospect. I remember once my friends and I built a raft to sail out to an island in the middle of this lake near to where I lived. I remember that first timeLizzy let me finger herin that old German bunker.
Come to think of it, I can't remember the last time I saw any kids playing outside. I suppose they're all inside playing video games or on their phones or something these days.
I feel old. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTzA_xesrL8
>>25922929
Someone wheel grandpa here into the day room and turn on Matlock for him.
>>25922929
Nice blog. How do I hnsubscribe
>ten days
>>25920377
Do you think it's for real? I sure hope so.
>Muddle sleeps peacefully on his pile of gold and other assorted treasures as Femnon watches him sleep.
>She gently brushes his loose strands of hair aside before sighing happily. Softly she picks him up and carries him out of his room.
>In the kitchen, she rests him down in a chair as she sets his limber body sitting upright before putting a spoon in his scaly hand and putting it on the table. She walks around the table and passes a sleeping Garble as he uses his newspaper for a pillow.
>She sits herself down on her chair and looks at her slumbering family before holding up a glass of orange juice "It sure is nice to spend time with my lovely family." She smiles before sipping and looking to Muddle "How was school today sweetie?" She asks as he just remains seated and sleeping "Good!" She claps before looking to Garble "Oh what's that honey? You want more juice? Why certainly." She replies as she just pours a glass of juice on the side of his face before throwing the glass at him and punching him a few times before gasping and awwing affectionally "Oh honey look! Muddle is so cute."
>Muddle fell forward and accidentally dunked his face into the cereal before him as she goes to him and holds him up "My messy little baby, even asleep he makes a mess. Bath time~"
>Today was a hibernation sleep kind of day
>Salai sits slouched on the couch as Sombra nervously taps his hooves together in front of her by a white board. With her usual disinterested glare she raises her hand "Dad does all this have a point? You've been there for 3 minutes now." She asks as He clears his throat before starting.
"Yes, right. Umm.." He trembles as sweat begins to roll down his face "There comes a time in every mares life when she will begin to blossom into a..a mare, aaaand Uh, she will begin to notice things about herself she..didn't notice before."
>"Is this a sex talk?" She asks almost upset "Dad, I've known about sex for like, ever now."
"I know kids your age THINK they everything about the world, but that just isn't so. There are lots of things about sex that you probably don't know about like.."
>"What like facials? Because I know about those."
"W.what is that? I.i don't know about that one."
>"Or spit roasting? Those are REALLY fun." She smiles as though remembering a pleasant thought.
"Isn't that for food?"
>"Dad, I get it, but you're a little too late to teach me about things you clearly know nothing about."
"Hey I know stuff, I used to be an evil warlord that rained death and misery to countless crystal ponies, and turned the street RED with the blood of my enemies!" He snarls as smoke and fire bellow from underneath his steel hooves before it settles as he laughs nervously raising a white binder "But do remind me what a diaphragm is, your mother left very messy notes."
>Later that day, Sombra has a whiteboard full of different military tactics and weapons on them as Salai has her whiteboard with vaginas and detailed sexual acts written on it.
"So I pull out BEFORE ejaculation and then apply it to her chest?"
>"Yeah, or else it's just a creampie."
"I'd rather be fighting the princesses than try to learn all this stuff."
>"Oh hey dad, speaking of that, how DID you go hoof to hoof with Celestia?"
"Oh it was quite easy, you see.."
>Today was a you teach me I teach you kind of day
>>25923677
I remember these
>>25923724
This one was especially nice, kek. Dad Sombra's the best
Are there any satyrs with a record?
>>25924450
Probably
>>25924526
Like?
>>25924590
Poachers
>>25922929
I did that too, but with sticks as was poorfag. Friends and I would run through the biggest muddiest puddles we could find and pretend we were in Nam.
>>25924627
>pretend we were in Nam
["It ain't me," playing quietly in the background]
Speaking of patriotism, which Satyrs would be the most patriotic?
>>25924652
Dash's.
>>25924652
Icarus, Ambrosia, Cider, Herc, Maverick, Lola, Stormchaser, Tonbo, and Mistake
>>25924677
What about the Apple Satyrs?
>>25924756
Yeah those too. Most ponies (not antagonists) would probably be patriotic, whatever that would mean in Equestria's case.
>>25925421
This is going on the fridge
>>25924652
I'd say any mane 6 satyr would be one of the more likely
>>25922632
So, for the hell of it, if you were asked to make a Satyr spin-off/continuation series of FiM, how would you do it?
>>25926493
Don't make Mary Sues and Gary Stus.
>>25926493
I wouldn't.
>>25923357
Soon
>>25926493
badly, probably.
I hate the CMC episodes. Their problems seem peurile in comparison to basically everything else that happens on the show. So I'd want the satyrs to be a bit older - call it mid/late teens.
But that brings you into HighSchoolAU territory, which is a cesspit of filth and crap.
Also, I prefer it when satyrs are a rarity - which means few humans. But there would have to be some explanation as to why there was only 1, or 5, or however many.
So, first thoughts:
have the regular series deal with the impending disaster that is an incoming asteroid. Which turns out to be a lifeboat from a spaceship. It's got a small amount of humans on it, and they're all adults.
My Little Abomination then picks up five years later. Most of the humans have settled in, spread over one or two cities and towns. Some have married locals, some have married each other.
There's a few young children at this point, but not many. Maybe one or two.
If it's staying as a kid's show, then the first season is loads of timeskips, and watching the characters grow up. If we're making it for us, then maybe start it ten years further in or so, but don't do timeskips.
The major plot arc for the first season is then "we have discovered a way to send you back to Earth. Are you going?"
We focus on the satyrs' struggles in this world with a timebomb ticking away - do they stay in Equestria, do they head back to Earth with those who go, or do they set off to found their own countrywith blackjack and hookers.
>>25926493
The most basic idea is make a Saturday morning cartoon like Batman: The Brave and the Bold where Hope is the main character.
>>25926585
>>25926596
>>25926655
ehhh, good points-
>>25927226
fuck that, actually, this would be hilarious.
>Action hungry, OUTRAGEOUS! Simmer
>Hope thwarting Mad God Kaos by tricking her into entering her mind
>Neil Patrick Harrisas Presto
>>25928393
D'aw. Poor Shortcake
>>25928443
Who is short cake? I cant keep up with all these satyrs
>>25928393
>>25928443
>"Earth" Ponies
Loving, Every, Laugh
>>25928657
The Cakes' somehow legitimate daughter.
>>25927689
I think Silver Age style of writing would fit satyrs just fine.
>>25930149
Which bite would hurt the most, a changeling satyr's, a drake's, a sphinx's, or a pup's?
>>25930330
You're forgeting bat satyrs. But why would changeling satyrz be in there?
>>25930149
>Satyr has to go to the dentist, but is scared
>What do?
>>25930149
poor thing. looks like anon may need to make her a modified mouthguard
>>25930149
how is dj so good at drawing hands? my attempts always come out looking like mutated stumps
>>25931288
Tough cookies. Go anyway.
>>25924450
When did that picture get coloured?
>>25924450
That's like six months of detention.
>>25930149
What's happening here? Is one of her baby teeth getting loose? Or are her fangs coming in?
>>25932671
The latter. Her fangs are starting to grow and she keeps accidentally biting her lips and tongue.
>>25924450
This makes me wonder, which satyrs were the most angsty teenagers, apart from Thorna.k.a. Little Miss "nobody understands my suffering".
I can sort of imagine Darcy trying to pull off the goth look and failing miserably partly due to not having pale enough skin.
>>25932709
So the fluid on her lower lips is blood? Holy shit, I thought it was drool.
>>25932824
It's probably a bit of both.
>>25932838
Also semen.
>>25926493
Stick with High Fantasy/Swords & Sorcery of the satyrs going on epic quests, fighting fantastical creatures, and saving the day which turns out to be merely all the satyrs just playing LARP in comically made armor and weapons à la Calvin & Hobbes.But because I'm DJ, it'll never get finished...
>>25931350
I hate to sound cliche, but practice.
>>25932838
This anon got it. I shaded the fluid lightly to give it the appearance of blood mixed with drool, like "washed out" or "watered down" blood.
>>25933016
You're thinking of the wrong batyr.
>>25933454
Surely you don't mean this little cutie? Why, she doesn't even know what a dick is, let alone hold several world titles for being the best sucker of them around.
>>25933454
Eyy, it's dis faggio. How's the holidays been treating you?
>>25933483Yet.
>>25933487
Christmas was fine. Didn't even get drunk. I don't want to get all bloggy, so I'll just wish you a Happy New Year.
>>25933509
Dear DJ-claus, please draw more trap porn. Sincerely, a guy who really enjoys your trap porn/signature trap.
>>25933843
What aboutreverse traps?
>>25933959
Also good
>>25934004
What's up with her tail?
http://m.imgur.com/gS6NjW0
http://m.imgur.com/avgXQyz
I wish /d/non
http://m.imgur.com/UkTf6NQ
http://m.imgur.com/zLVc5c1 (especially this)
http://m.imgur.com/yeZYowq
http://m.imgur.com/a44o3D7
And who ever drew these
http://m.imgur.com/uMznFWX
And this would come back
>>25934039
A talalalalala. Some sort of lizard thing with a hard to pronounce name.
>>25934051
The only one that isn't /d/non is Simmer
>>25934039
It's a satyr of Tatzljack.
https://derpibooru.org/tags/tatzljack
>>25934080
REALLY?! Oh, I'm praying /d/ comes back now. (And Simmer guy, just super impressed with the /d/ right now.)
>>25933483
>"Yuzu, where'd you run off to this time?"
>Scanning through the crowds of ponies, Anon finally caught sight of a satyr girl facing away from him sporting familiar bat-like wings and oh so fluffy ears.
>He breathed a sigh of relief, glad to have found his little girl before she got into any trouble.
>Rest assured, she'd be getting the talking to of a lifetime when they got home.
>This was the second time in a week that she'd left the house without telling him where she was going.
>What mattered now though was that she was safe.
>"There you are," he spoke as he approached the girl from behind. "What have I told you about wondering off by yourself?"
>Placing his hand on her shoulder, Anon's eyes widened as the young girl spun around and revealed herself not to be his daughter after all.
>Anon immediately withdrew his hand, not wanting to be seen touching somebody else's child.
>"Oh, uh... Sorry, kid, I thought you were somebody else."
>The young girl looked up at him quizzically.
"Who?"
>Anon chuckled awkwardly.
>"My daughter actually. She's a batyr too. You haven't seen her, have you? She's about your height and you look very similar from behind, hence why I, um... grabbed you."
>Damn it, something about the way this kid was staring at Anon made him very uncomfortable, and he couldn't seem to string a sentence together without it sounding sounding in a muddle.
>Anon swore he briefly saw the little satyr smirk in a way no child of her age should.
"Wow, you must really like how I look from behind to grab me like that, huh?"
>Anon coughed and looked away.
>"Sorry, but there aren't many satyrs around here, much less of the bat persuasion. I just sort of assumed."
>The girl giggled.
"That's okay, I didn't say I minded."
>This conversation was getting weirder by the second.
>"Well that's... good?"
>The girl grinned.
"I like you. You can grab me again if you like, sir."
>>25934181
>Every fibre of Anon being was screaming at him to abort immediatly and get the hell away from this weird girl.
>This had to be some kind of set-up, right?
>Any second now a bunch of Royal Guards would burst out of the bushes and insist he take a seat.
>"Uh, that's alright thanks. If you could just tell me if you've seen my daughter then I can get-"
>"Daddy!"
>Anon's head turned on a swivel in the direction of the call.
>There was Yuzu skipping towards him with a happy grin.
>"Oh thank God," said Anon, half out of relief that his little girl was okay and half out of thanks for now having an excuse to stop talking to the strange girl giving him bedroom eyes.
>Kneeling down, Anon scooped Yuzu up into his arms as she launched herself into his embrace.
>Standing back up with her throwing her arms around his neck, Anon kissed her on the side of the head.
>"You are in so much trouble, young lady. What have I told you about going out without telling me? What if you'd got hurt?"
>Yuzu rolled her eyes.
>"I'm fine, daddy. I even made a new friend!"
>"Oh, who?"
>Yuzu looked at her father like he was an idiot.
>"Uh, duh, she's right behind you."
>Turning around, Anon once more looked down at the girl from before who now gave him a highly inappropriate wink.With her eye, perverts.
>"Oh, right... okay. What was your name again?"
>The girl giggled.
"My name's murmur, but you can call me whatever you want, sir."
SLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT!
>>25934190
I find the idea of Anon being harassed by a sexually precocious little satyr girl insanely amusing.
>Walking out of the en suite bathroom, Anon was greeted by a most unexpected sight.
>"~Hey, Mr. Anon~"
>With naught but a towel covering his modesty, he looked up to see his daughter's newest friend sprawled across his bed.
"Oh, hello Murmur... You, uh... you okay?"
>The girl giggled.
>"Your bed's sooo comfy."
>Damn this girl.
>What was it that she wanted?
"So what are you doing here?"
>Murmur smiled and bit her lower lip.
>"Yuzu invited me over. I hope that's okay, sir."
>Man this girl was creepy, thought Anon, but it was best to play nice.
"Sure, that's fine, but I meant what're you doing in my bedroom?"
>Again she giggled.
>"I don't know... Maybe we can think of something to do together?"
>At that moment, the door swung open and in walked Yuzu.
>"Dad, I can't get the TV to-"
>She looked up to see her father standing dripping wet from the shower, clutching a towel covering his lower half while no more than a few feet away her young friend lay watching him intently with a distinct blush gracing her cheeks.
>"Oh my god, dad! Stop trying to seduce my friends, Gawd!"
>Throwing her arms up in annoyance, Yuzu stormed back out of the room and slammed the door closed behind herself.
>"That's illegal you know!" Came a muffled shout a few moments later.
>>25934190
Yuzu's friend Murmur wants her dad, Mistake's friend Yuzu wants her dad, and the cycly continues
>>25934404
Mistake wants her friends to stop being creepy. Little does she know it's her fault. Her changeling hormones have long term effects when someone is around her for a long time.
>>25934389
LMFAO Stop, you guys, before you make do another comic.
>>25934131
>>25934051
They've got an art blog here: http://probsacat-art.tumblr.com
I'm sure if you could commission stuff from them if you want.
>25934389
>At that moment, the door swung open and in walked Yuzu.
>"Dad, I can't get the TV to-"
>She looked up to see her father standing dripping wet from the shower, clutching a towel covering his lower half while no more than a few feet away her young friend lay watching him intently with a distinct blush gracing her cheeks.
>"Oh my god, Murmur, you whore!"
>The girl on the bed frowned.
>"Hey, I am not!"
>Yuzu huffed and placed her hands on her hips.
>"I already told you, daddy belongs to me!"
>Anon, who had up until this point been watching the exchange without the faintest clue what to say, chose now to speak up.
"Yuzu, sweetie, I don't know what you think is going on here, but-"
>His daughter pointed an accusatory finger at him.
>"And you! You've been petting her fluffy ears behind my back, haven't you? Admit it!"
"Sweetie-"
>"This is the ultimate betrayal!"
"Darling, it's not what you think."
>Yuzu reached up and touched her own ears self-consciously.
>"A-Are mine not fluffy enough? I'll... I'll get fluffiness enhancement surgery if you want, just please don't leave me like mommy did!"
Fixed.
>>25934482
Not him, but do it fgt.You know, if you have time and if you want to senpai.
>>25934582
Aaand it got weird
>>25934582
>>"A-Are mine not fluffy enough? I'll... I'll get fluffiness enhancement surgery if you want, just please don't leave me like mommy did!"
Pic related. It's Yuzu's face when she receives the note from her dad telling her that she's been disowned in favour of a girl with even fluffier ears. A dad has needs after all.
>>25934582
Seriously though, Yuzu needs to work on her self-esteem and electra complex. This dependency on her father is unhealthy.
>>25934622
Somebody should write a story about her working to improve herself and grow out of the dependency she has on her dad.
Speaking if bat girl
>>25934651
There was some green a while back with all the satyrs with Electra Complexes in group therapy. Hope had the saddest story.
>>25934668
>chubby Yuzu
I have to get dressed and leave for work in like five minutes, don't do this to me asshole.
>>25934688
That's chubby? Doesn't look all that much.
Hello guys, it's been a while. How's the satyring? Have we devolved into sexalizing the daughters/sons?
>>25934775
>Have we devolved into sexalizing the daughters/sons?
Pretty sure it's been like that since the start, it's just that people complain about it more now.
>>25934801
Wasn't it like that at the start, only now it's more about sexualising satyrs with other satyrs? I know I've never complained about parent x satyr because stories like that are quite rare now.
>>25934845
Right, it's devolved to complaining about specific kinds of sexualizing.
>>25934775
Hey, welcome back. I'm pretty new here, but it's cool seeing someone drop by for a bit. Were you a writer or an artist?
>>25934668
"Yuzu."
>"Yeah, dad."
"Lose some weight, you fat fuck. Jesus Christ, what would Zyzz think?"
>"Oh my god dad, so what if I put on a few pounds? Is this going to turn into another story about how you wanted to name me after your stupid bodybuilding idol but they made a typo on my birth certificate that you didn't notice until it was too late again?"
"Less of the lip, young lady. Now, get working that fat ass of yours."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x_AuBn40BWgI'm not sorry.
>>25934884
Why does Yuzu have that name anyway?
>>25934902
Her design was inspired by Yuzuha, one of my favorite characters from Tenchi Muyo.
Plus, Yuzu is a fruit andI was toldbatponies eat fruit, so it just made sense.
>>25934884
>"uh, for your information, daddy, Zyzz would love my ass. He'd say it was 'fuarking joocy' actually."
>>25934699
Maybe it was more wishful thinking on my part now that I look at it again.
Though I wouldn't mind if she had a bit of chub from sneaking a few too many candied fruits when her dad wasn't looking.
>>25935154
Personally I just can't see Yuzu ever getting chubby. I've always pictured her becoming very style and appearance focused as a teenager. That's not to say shallow, but rather that she's just very mindful of always appearing attractive and fashionable at all times. You know, except for when it's just her and her dad enjoying a lazy Sunday at home. That's when she lets her hair down and happily spends the entire day in her baggy pajama bottoms and one of her dad's oversized shirts without any makeup.
>>25935273
I imagine she's like Emma. A chubby girl who just wants to enjoy life.
Maybe it's just me, but I'd satyr girls to take care of their bodies and keep it healthy rather than having a gut.
>>25935788
I prefer a little chub. More cushion for the pushin, more pillows to faceplant into, and more cuddle to wuddle.
>>25935805
I just can't see the appeal of sweaty flabs of skin. Soft or not, being overweight doesn't look all that great.
>>25935842
To each their own.
>>25935273
>>25935904
>>25935904
You draw some cute satyr workouts
Trimmings failing next?
>>25935904
Kek. Love your fitness satyrs
>>25935936
I want to carry her on my back while jogging so long as she talks like Yoda.
>>25935904
Pure natty batty.
>>25935842
There is a right amount of chub, in my opinion. That pic of the cow Satyr (whose name I totally forgot) that DJ drew is honestly the perfect example, in m opinion. Much more than that and you're getting into too much chub.
Not saying Yuzu is at that level. Just enough to pinch a little if you grabbed her stomach. Plus I like the idea that Yuzu has a weakness for candied fruit (or the like) and either sneaks some when her dad isn't looking or makes puppy dog eyes at him to get some.
>>25935904
Cute pic, but wouldn't they make a special type of weight for wing exercises instead of using dumbbells?also exercising Ace when?
>>25935978
I have no memory of drawing that...
>>25935904
>Emma sees her walking down the street.
"Tch... Some people have all the luck. I'd be skinny too if I had her genetics. It doesn't mean anything."
>Alex sees her walking down the street.
"Cardio babby!"
>Snapshot sees her walking down the street.
"Damn, that's an ass I'd go hetero for... Well almost.
>(Insert satyr here) sees her walking down the street.
"Hey baby, why don't you come play with my shake weight? Get it? I'm asking you to jerk me off."
>>25936176
>the cow Satyr (whose name I totally forgot)
Petunia
>wouldn't they make a special type of weight for wing exercises instead of using dumbbells
I just thought it was funny
>>25936176
Petunia is the cow satyr, and yeah I agree, I think Emma and Yuzu would be on the chuby side.
>>25935068
I fucking knew it
>>25936177
You were probably blind drunk, you damn alcoholic.
>>25936265
Don't fuggen crit-, creeta-, *hic* judge mme phhhhhhaggitI actually don't drink that often, although I am drinking right now kek
>>25936253
>Emma as an sjw
No...
>Alex as a lift bro
HA! Fly or die, biiiitch.
>Snapshot having straight thoughts
What is this, bible camp?!
>Indescript satyr being vulgar
Why, I never!Got a couple chuckles.
>>25936292
Quick, while you're the right amount of inebriated, draw Petunia's sweet phat ass!
>>25936310
I was going to make the last one her dad teasing her, but then I thought that it may cause an argument that lasts fifty posts.
>>25936319
Sorry to burst your bubble, anon, but I'm only lurking for a few moments longer while I wait for a download. I'm just too much in the mood to play Fallout 4, so sorry, no drunken sketch time with DJ I'm afraid.
But I'm sure I'll get totally hammered tomorrow, so try again then.
>>25936339
You chose the road less traveled to save the thread from a storm of shit. I thank you.
>>25936349
Okay. 24 hours to booty. 24 hours to booty...
>>25936349
Spoiler: It turns out Frodo is the bad guy and you have to nuke Hogwarts or else kill Han Solo, who is your uncle.
>>25936398
Nice try, but I was already spoiled before I bought the game, but I have no shits to give. It's still entertaining as fuck.
>tfw can't play Fallout 4 with Yuzu
>>25936417
She'd just want you to go around punching everything with Swan's weapon.
>>25936258
I'unno, she looks alright to me
>>25936417
DJ confirmed for Sonygger
>>25936497
How did they get a playstation in equestria?
>>25936497
That girl in the background on that poster looks suspiciously like Snapshot.
>>25936507
Oh shit foresight.
>>25936497
>Mistake will never morph into Yuzu and have a heated tongue wrestling session with 'herself'.
>>25936497
>Mistake causes a diversion to distract Yuzu while she wins the match with D"Vorah
"FINISH HER!"
>>25936660
>Mistake playing as D,Vorah
but who was Yuzu playing as?
>>25936583
Do you think Yuzu and Mistake are apart of the mile high club? They've both got wings
>>25936711Leatherface or the predator
>>25936497
what's with all the las vegas memorabilia?
>>25936762
DJ lives in Vegas?
>>25937334
I'm pretty sure it's a reference to In Search of Mother
>>25936720
No, but I bet Icarus and Stormchaser are.
>>25936734
why leatherface
>>25938276
There was a picture of her and Mistake watching a horror movie. I was thinking of that picture specifically.
So what hobbies do the Satyrs have?
>>25940596
Emma writes fanfic and draws amateur doujinshi. She likes importing the manga and anime from Earth since there's little quality in most material from Nippone. She really wants to make a "deep" Super Sentai anime of her own one day(one of the characters may or may not be a self-insert)but gets distraught over her body image whenever she gets started.
>>25940596
Petunia does enjoy writing stories about a young farmer who falls in love with one of the people who works in the farm. It also has him fighting rogue bounty hunters, saving mares tied to a railroad, and stopping an evil desperado, but the romance is the main point.
What are the length of the tongue of every drake? The exact length might be questionable but here's my take on it, from longest to shortest:
>1st - Missy
>2nd - Thistle
>3rd - Broil/Simmer
>4th - Blare
>5th - Snap
>6th - Muddle
>7th - Cinder
>>25942583
Bats have really long ass tongues.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mUloK7Zesx4
>Yuzu will never spiral her tongue completely around your cock
>>25942698
>tongue becomes engorged with blood and increases in length
>bats have tongue boners
>>25942698
>>25942714
Whenever Yuzu gets turned on, she gets a throbbing tongue boner that causes her to lisp horribly.
"Man, I'd totally shtuck that guy'sh cock. I'd shtuck it shuper har- Ah! I bit my tongue again."
>>25942843
Hot damn. Best satyr just got better. Also happy new year from down under.
>>25934599
In a good way.
>>25942843
>>25942698
I think it's just that one bat that has a tongue like that
>>25942698
Female bats are also known to perform fellatio in the wild to extend the duration of mating.
>>25939213
This one?
>>25943463
Don't ruin this for me, anon
>>25943561
ProtipIt's not a horror movie, it's a hardcore fetish porno.You know, one of the REALLY nasty ones where you're pretty sure the girls were paid in heroin and not money.
>>25943463
God damn, I'm an idiot. The first time I read that I thought you meant literally just that once bat specifically. It's only now, like twenty minutes later, that I realise you mean that one sub-species.
>"Hey, Frank, drink any good nectar lately? By the way, who's the freak with the tongue longer than his entire body?"
"Oh that's just Paul. He's retarded, don't look at him or he may come talk to us."
>"Woah, what a weirdo. Anyway, you wanna go bite some West Africans?
"Sure, sounds good."
Poor Paul.
>>25943625
Are you the dude who does most of the satyr doodles? your stuff is nice, could you perhaps critique this thing ive been doodling.
>>25943674
Sorry, not him. I can't draw for shit.
>>25943977
k, ill move over to the draw thread then.
Completely sfw pic. No genitals or gore.
>>25944654
>Prism and Sapphire eat lunch together
>>25944005
I'm the guy that did the doodles. I'll look at yours if you want.
>>25944654
>>25944768
>Cider gets jealous.
>"Why won't you make me choke on yer lunch?"
>A single tear rolls down her eye before Sapphire pounces her and shoves her thick footlong sub down her throat.
>The boys just watch with why-boners as Cider's head bobs.
>>25944896
>Prism and Cider both deep throat one end of Sapphire's sandwich
>They make muffled moaning sounds as they try to make out
>Sapphire runs her fingers through their hair and calls them both good girls
I don't have time to Masturbate damn it.
>>25939995
Oh Solaire. For a knight, you have surprisingly little tact.
>>25944785
I think this is the picture he wanted to show.
>>25944129
>>25940596
Selena enjoys knitting, sewing, and crocheting. She often makes scarves and other things for the guards on cold nights. She also made plushies for her cousins and her brother when they were younger. Dawn regularly sleeps with her's, Radiance talks to it about his various insecuritiesbecause it won't judge him, and Sirius keeps his on one of his shelves.
Sirius is into model trains and cities. He has an entire room dedicated to the various things he's built. He enjoys having a miniature city run like clockwork under his supervision, and he hates it when others mess with it.
>>25946068
>"Anonymous, dear, prithy, what is thy qualm at the moment?"
>'..Sirius says my hotwheels have no place in his 'quaint little burg away from the city.''
>>25946146
There is an archive. Use it.
>>25946253
Surprise, surprise, it doesn't seem to be in the searchable archive.
>>25946146
Is this the one?
"Dawn get up already!"
>Prodding your daughter with a foot you frown as the pink haired satyr rolls over tucking her blanket over her shoulder.
"Oh for the love of...how can you not be a morning person, it's in your damn name at this point!"
>Your twelve year old ignores your rant content with sleeping in.
>From further up the hallway you can hear your Sunny Buns shout.
>"Anon is Dawn up yet? Radi's just getting out of the bathroom."
>Before you can answer you are interrupted as you hear Selena, "Thank goodness, move it sparky."
>"Wafaf gehugg!"
>"Can't speak toothbrush, sorry!"
>"Selena, be nice to your cousin, and fix your mane for your mother's sake."
>"Tia? I know we're supposed to do family wake ups together, but can I go to bed yet?"
>Looking over at Dawn you sigh before bending down and lifting with your legs.
"Kid, you are getting too big for my britches to keep doing this."
>Going down the hallway you stop at the sight of Radiance banging on the door.
>"MmFFHAM!"
>Sunny Buns taps Radiance on the head gently, "Language son, and use the other bathroom, its right there."
>Passing by Luna whose eyes are sagged from her last all nighter the mare eyes Dawn with no small amount of jealously.
>Seeing your co-wife staring like that with a sniffle for added effect you turn and kneel down letting her see your back.
"Go ahead and get on, lazy Moonbuns."
>Flustered horse noises.
>"We are not lazy! We just got away from Night Court!"
>Despite her words you feel her weight clamber atop your back and with a grunt your up again.
>At seeing your burden Sunny Buns sniggers behind a hoof before a small burst of blue magic bops her head.
>"Not a word, sister."
>Darting in to give your other wife a kiss you smile at her, "Breakfast is in the dining hall near Luna's room right?"
>"Yes Dear, now go and get our little sunshine up."
>>25946503
>This takes you back.
>Setting Dawn down in her chair you watch as she wraps her arms around her tail.
>"Daww..."
>Thank you Moon Buns for saving heart from the cute.
"Remember when we had to get all three of them ready for school?"
>"Verily, twas a most joyful occasion!"
"If I remember right you cried your eyes out."
>The bap to your head was expected.
>"It's not every day when our foal has the courage to ask their teacher if they can hug their parents goodbye!"
>Chuckling you reach back and heft Luna up higher on your back.
"Yeah, that was too cute for words, come on lemme get you tucked in."
>Luna squeezes your neck, "Wait, I can stay up a bit longer for this."
>Stopping you look back over your shoulder at the bags under Luna's eyes.
"You sure?"
>"Mhmm."
"Well far be it from me to not obey his lady."
>With a flair you march over to Luna's chair only to be stopped again.
>"No, let us forgo the formalities and sit together, please?"
>How odd, usually Luna was such a stickler for teaching the children proper meal etiquite all the time, maybe Sunny Buns was finally getting to her?
>Shrugging you sit Luna down next to Dawn and pull your little girl up in her chair.
>Pulling her hair brush out you start to tame the wild mess of hair Dawn always wakes up with.
"It's time to get up, it's time to get up, it's time to get up in the morning."
>With each phrase you bring the brush down straightening the unruly locks.
"Oh sleepy sissy, won't you get up, it's time to get up in the morning, ain't it great to stay up late?"
>"Daaad, that's so laaaaame."
>"Pfft, if thou got up earlier than thou wouldn't be emberassed every morn."
"Daww, but my mom sung this song to me all the time in the morning! Or would you prefer...this!"
>Bringing your face down into the crook of Dawn's neck you rub your whiskers in her skin.
>Dawn lets out a screech of surprise and wiggles in her seat trying to get away.
>"MOOOOOOM! DAD'S BEING MEAN AGAAAAAAIN!"
>>25946503
Yeah this is it. Thank you.
>>25946515
>With a jerk you pull away finger in your ears trying to get the ringing to stop.
"God I forgot how loud you get."
>"Tis a sign of good breeding when one's child has their parent's attributes!"
"Yeah like the fact she has pony legs has nothing what so ever to do with that."
>"...Hush you."
>Snickering you grab the brush and finish off Dawn's rebellion in her hair.
>"Anon, are you torturing our daughter again?"
>Looking over your shoulder you grin at seeing Celestia trotting in with two rather wet teens with sulking looks to their face.
"Sunny Buns!"
>"Hi mommy, Dad's doing that thing with his beard."
>Sunny Buns comes to a stop next to you and nuzzles you.
>"I find it rather charming."
>"Ew gross, Mom don't do that."
>"Mom, make Auntie stop being weird."
>Luna takes the moment to lean over nuzzling your other side.
>"Oh? Whatever could thou mean Selena?"
>Selena points at your cuddle huddle with a glare and finger.
>"That!"
>Radiance nods, "Yeah come on guys, don't scar us for life!"
"Boyo, if I wanted to scar you I'd have used the magi tapes from your birth."
>Seeing all of your children pale at the threat you cackle evilly.
>Dawn at this point flicks a doughnut at your face, "Dad's gone evil again! Radiance, get the elements here! Selena and I will hold him off!"
>Sunny Buns uses her magic to stop Radiance from running off, "Oh no you don't, you can only use kingdom in peril so many times before it doesn't count."
>"But Mom!"
>"Listen to your mother, and but's is not the proper way to start a sentence young man."
>Picking the doughnut off your face you regard your pipsqueak rival before holding the pastry aloft.
"Dear daughter, I'm afraid..."
>With a flick you send the doughnut flying to land on her cheek.
"This means war!"
>"Anon no!"
>"They just got dressed!"
>From your three little hellions you hear them cheer, "Food fight!"
>Later you had to stay behind in detention with your children as your wives forced you to stay with them.
>Damn princess power.
>>25946519
No problem.
>>25946522
If only to be born one
>>25946522
It's nice, but I'm a tad dissapointed Sirius isn't in it.
>>25946522
cute
>>25946729
I'm honestly kinda glad he isn't. Never been fond of that satyr since he has almost zero art and stories.
He's kinda like a question mark to me right now, but hopefully posts like
>>25946068
>>25946098
will fix that in the future.
Happy new year from Sweden! May this year be a good year for satyrs!
>>25946843
Hej from Finland.
>>25946843
Happy new year from Norway!
>>25946503
If you wanted an excuse to post your story, you didn't need to samefag.
>>25946967
He wasn't samefagging. I'm the guy who asked.
>>25946967
>your story
I wish! If I could write like that, then I would've written a ton of stories by now.
>>25942583
Who the heck is Cinder?
>>25947410
Isn't that the blacksmith drake satyr?
>>25947463
We have one of those?
>>25947463
This one?
>>25947541
>>25947543
I was thinking of this one, which was posted a few threads ago. Might be the same satyr though.
>>25947702
>>25947543
They're the same, yeah. We have a story about her, but that's when she's young.
SATYR UP ALL NIGHT
>>25948726
No. Satyr go to bed.
Hey, herd thread is back and they are judging the early satyr names.
>>25948726
Which satyr enjoys being up all night the most?
>>25949286
>caring about the opinions of a dead thread
Their shambling corpse will be back where it belongs before too long.
>>25949400
Sirius
Selena
Sweet Dreams
>>25949404
>Dead general
>About to page 10
>>25951457
Because people are out celebrating the New Year?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dw1qi9ofbg4
What do you think about Noire Fantasy satyrs?
>>25952143
>>25952143
Depends, what kind of cases are we talking about? And who are our detectives?
>>25952161
Well there's Hope, of course, and maybe Mistake as our detectives. Cases would generally be theft, kidnapping, arson, assault; basically everything short of murder unless it gets edgy.
>>25952190
What was their first case?
>>25953000
Sapphire's stolen Spring ensemble
Hiw do you think other satyrs would fare as monster hunters given if they were trained for it as well? Would they like it? Hate it?Would they like the suit?
>every prompt is answered by a single person
>back and forth dead end conversation on prompt
>satyr goes back to being absolutely dead
RIP In Pieces, Satyr Thread
>>25953879
I'm sure a lot of us have unfinished stories in the works.
>>25953911
Do you?I don't.
>>25953911
Doubtful.
>>25953919
Yes.
>>25953929
Well make something short then. Doesn't have to be overcomplicated.
>>25953000
Snapshot's stolen virginity.There are over forty suspects, and he can't remember which one fucked him first that night.
>>25954005
>"Come on, Snapshot, you've gotta remember which of these guys you had sex with first."
"Uh.... Jeez, this is really hard."
>"What, are you serious? Just how many men did you fuck to not be able to remember?"
"Look, it's not that easy, okay? Maybe if you let me see their dicks then I may be able to remember."
>"What, why?"
"I never forget a cock."
>"Ugh, fine! But promise you won't go full boyslut mode and start having gay homosex in the office."
"Hey, I'm not some sex-crazed maniac that goes mad with lust at the sight of a nice hard, throbbing dick. But okay, I promise I won't do anything gay."Snapshot lied.
>>25954094
His entire family must be soo fucking proud of him...
>"Heh, ain't that cute? My little daughter has learned how to play the flute. What's your son doing?"
>"He's learned how to suck forty dicks. Yep, he has become this town's greatest cock-loving cumdumpster."
>"..."
>>25954208
Snapshot dresses like a man and bribes a local satyr girl to pretend to be his girlfriend whenever his dad visits.
>>25954232
>Implying everyone wouldn't find out eventually anyway, either by seeing photos someone took, hearing about it on the streets, or by walking in on him
>>25953879
>The morning of New Year's Day
People are either asleep or hungover. Calm down.
>>25954294
I was referring to the state of satyr, not just today.
>>25954302
It was Christmas a week ago, and we had some activity during the time between that and New Years.
People are out doing shit.
>>25954361
Stop damage controlling
This place has been dead for months
>>25954388
Well then maybe if you wrote some content...
>>25954410
Did that for a while, not interested.
>>25954410
Why bother.
>>25954388
>run off artists
>run off writers
>do nothing but argue and circle jerk
Fuck I posted a WIP of a story last thread and the only reply I got was "I had a hard time reading it."Because apparently having named humans is some sort of taboo here.
>>25954414
>>25954418
And this sort of defeatist attitude is why we're dead. No one wants to write, or draw, or produce any type of content. Fuck I haven't even seen Aaron here for a long while yet I saw him in the secret Santa threads not too long ago.
This place needs some sort of attitude adjustment or it's going to die a sad, pathetic death. Which is something I doubt anyone here wants.
>>25954418
>>25954414
Well if it bothers you so much, why not do something to rectify the problem instead of just complaining about it and thinking "it's okay, it's somebody else's responsibility and problem and I don't have to do anything to help" then?
>>25954441
>Fuck I haven't even seen Aaron here for a long while yet I saw him in the secret Santa threads not too long ago.
Peekaboo.
>>25954447
I'm not bothered. I don't really care if this place dies.
I'm just here to see if anyone does anything about it.
>>25954441
>Fuck I posted a WIP of a story last thread
Had to visit the last thread to know what story you're talking about.
Is it the one where Spitfire's husband is named Jamie? Read it right now and I have to say that I actually liked it. The only thing I didn't like is that the unicorn satyrs, like Hope, have horns.
>Because apparently having named humans is some sort of taboo
I get that many don't like it when the humans have names, but is it really that bad? I mean, if humans aren't allowed to have names or anything other than a suit and green skin, then what in the hell is a writer supposed to when there are several humans in their stories? For crying out loud, they can't all be called Anon!Unless you're writing a comedy.
>>25954614
Well having come from AiE it's hard for me to write a human protagonist as anything other than a blank slate with some loose character traits. But I do love comedy.
>>25954441
>Because apparently having named humans is some sort of taboo here
Not just here, but in /mlp/ in general. The solution is simple - don't have human OCs other than Anon or Femanon.
>>25954614
Just refer to any other human by their relationship to whoever they are related to. Anon's friend, Anon's uncle, etc.
>>25954761
>"Yo! Anon's friend!"
>"What is it, Anon's uncle?"
>"Have you seen Anon's brother?"
>"No. Have you seen Anon's sister?"
>"She's visiting Anon and his family."
>"Great! Can you tell Anon's second friend to visit me later today?"
>"Sure thing, Anon's friend. Welp, time to visit Anon's grandpa."
>>25954453
I thought you abandoned us.
>>25954614
I see the human parents as actual people, not some faceless, nameless jackass. It helps me think of them as actual characters instead of being blank slates to project onto. Yes I know where I am, but that's just my opinion.
I tried to make the names as average Joe sounding as possibleI'm not going to be naming anyone Stary Blartflast or the like, plus I didn't want to use different variations of Anonymous because they sound stupidNony, Anon, appleanon, Twianon, etc. Plus it makes dialogue sound more natural to call someone by name as opposed to using pet/nicknames all the time.
Though after thinking about it I realized that I probably shouldn't have the human parent as the main focus like that unless writing about cute family stuff. I was kinda going for comedy, SoL, and setup with that first story, and I even realized Ace was more a prop than anything. But she was a week old so it was kinda moot. Granted I could always write background stuff in passingI always misspelled Hotshot's name as "Hot Shot," so I had an idea about a story involving his birth where his dad writes his name with a space on his birth certificate. But I could mention that sort of thing in passing as well.
As for horns, that's another personal preference. Helps mark Unicorn Satyrs as such and keep them different from Earth Satyrs and Alicorns from Pegasus Satyrs.
>>25954852
I post in thread all the time. I'm just not an obnoxious namefag who leaves it on when I'm not gonna contribute.
I mean, who else is gonna update the damn dropbox?
>>25954847
Makes sense to me.
>>25954847
Yeah, but why are you having humans talk to each other for extended periods in a thread about relationships between parents and kids?Chalk up another reason why solo human is gud
>>25954744
Right. How does he not get that?
>>25954761
Or [Wife horse]'s husband/[husband horse]'s wife, mr/mrs [spouse horse].
>>25954876
Long story short: Aaron has the decency not to openly circlejerk. Thank you Aaron.
>>25955047
Solo on family or solo harem? One family I can agree with, harem though... What are you, a fookin weeb? If that is indeed what you are implying.
>>25954852
No offense, but just because someone wants to portray a character as anonymous doesn't make them less of a character or a jackass. I can tell you the defining traits of two different fathers that remain anonymous in their stories, but still leave a very human lasting impression.
Also, regarding the story, I didn't really get a comedic vibe from it. While not my taste, it's a nice SoL story, but the sudden emnity Jamie (Jack? I know it's a J and not JoJo) feels for the Princess and her consort makes him come off as unneccessarily tense.
>>25955047
It can still work with people still remaining relatively Anonymous. It's not all that difficult or tedious.
>>25955047
>Yeah, but why are you having humans talk to each other for extended periods in a thread about relationships between parents and kids?
I didn't an on the humans really interact much unless one of their kids was involved.
>>25955283
>Right. How does he not get that?
Whenever I read a story and the name "Anon," or the like comes up, it breaks the immersion for me. I'm reminded that I'm reading about a faceless self insert instead of an actual human being.
I, personally, don't want to read about a faceless self insert. Something as little as having a name helps humanize them. I have a hard time caring about Anonymous, even after reading about him. Yeah I understand that most of the stories written on this board are about self insert fantasies (AiE, Flutterrape, this very thread), but I never really connected with them for some reason.
Plus, as I said, using names makes a conversation sound more natural, as people don't always use "buddy, guy, friend," etc when talking to each other.
It also makes other interactions easier to write.
>Parent and child interaction
I'll admit by mom/dad/etc makes perfect sense. Being in the pony parent and then names would start to be dropped when they spoke to each other.
>Spouse interaction
Honey/Sweetie does work, but people use their spouse's names all the time when talking.
>Parents interacting with others
I can understand calling someone sir or ma'am or the like when doing business or you don't know their names, but assuming they're friends they would use each other's names all the time. But like I said I would try to limit parent to parent interaction unless their child was directly involved somehow.
It pretty much boils down to "it's my opinion." I just don't like using Anonymous as a character name.
>>25955640
>I didn't really get a comedic vibe from it
I was going for something at the end where Jamie jokingly said Celestia was a vampire. Then once Spitfire says vampires can't walk in the sun Jamie would say "maybe she found some good sunscreen."
It's awful I know.
>but the sudden emnity Jamie (Jack? I know it's a J and not JoJo) feels for the Princess and her consort makes him come off as unneccessarily tense.
With that I was going for "where I'm from, rulers are just people, not eternally youthful demigods who move heavenly bodies on a daily basis."
I imagined that several humans would take some time in getting used to magic being commonplace. Then you get one of the strongest in the country/world knocking on your door and it goes downhill from there.
>>25955739
>I didn't an on the humans really interact much unless one of their kids was involved.
Should be "I didn't plan on," not "an on."
>>25956300
Oh springtime; you're so close, and yet so far.
>>25956465
What are the Satyrs looking forward to doing in the spring?
>>25956718
Ur mom
Soooo...this is a thing....i have no idea, I just looking for generals to color fag all over
>>25956922
http://sys.4chan.org/derefer?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.dropbox.com%2Fsh%2Fd94jlx7pgl5gg34%2FAABM4w-okI70GyrbCsVNee9Ga%3Fdl%3D0
Here's the dropbox. Have a blast!
>>25956976
Oh shit that's alot of shit
>>25956718
>What are the Satyrs looking forward to doing in the spring?
>Laika - Looking forward to rubbing herself all over the new flowers and grass as the sun warms her belly. Bonus points if Garret is there to pour her wine and tell her shes a good girl while rubbing her stomach.
>Muddle - Laying on the nice hot rocks and maybe playing with himself if nobody is around
>Ding - Gets to see her fish friends at the aquarium more often
>Presto & Clockwork - Putting on more shows out in public
Warren - Maybe finally getting lucky now that the mares are in heat. He never does
>Broil - Trying on cute bikinis
>Alex - Getting back into the running
>Emma - New animes and manga to watch
>>25957039
Yeah, we've got a lot of one off artists, and a lot of stuff that just gets dropped off without intent of color.
>>25957148
>Ding - Gets to see her fish friends at the aquarium more often
Aren't aquariums open year round?I usually put Garret with Cider but Lakia is growing on me
>>25956718
Presto is looking forward to taking Melody out on a romantic picnic on a blooming meadow.
>>25957205
>Aren't aquariums open year round?
They are, but the cold makes it more difficult to go. Glad to hear you are warming up to Garret and Laika, they are a cute couple.
>>25957209
I bet Melody loves to smell the different flowers in the spring too.
>>25953000
Fizzle hired them to find his young kids that his wife ran off with because she kept insisting that he let her train them to be ruthless monster hunters instead of having a normal life like all the other satyr kids.
>>25957498
But not all satyrs have a normal life, like Aeon, Atlas, and the Spitfire twins.
>>25957148
>Clockwork
Love this cutie patootie mime satyr. And Solitaire too, love her design.
>>25957429
>I bet Melody loves to smell the different flowers in the spring too.
She's learned how to identify a lot of flowers by their fragrance alone, which always impresses Presto.
>Melody learned much about flowers from Leaf
>They're really good friends
>>25957797
>Love this cutie patootie mime satyr
She is adorable, and I honestly think a better match for Presto than Melody but he will be her oneitis for a long time.I dont see her really hooking up with anybody long term tho.
>>25957996
>and I honestly think a better match for Presto than Melody
Why? Because they both entertain ponies?
>They kinda have the same job, so they MUST be destined for each other
>>25958025
>implying that logic hasn't been used for a vast majority of the pairings in this thread
>>25958057
Vast majority? That's bullshit and you know it.
>>25958025
Sharing a common interest is nice, yes. Its not bad to use a common interest as an entry point to build a deeper relationship. But I feel you are trying to bait an argument. I think they compliment each other, and I think that works better than a blind girl who just sits in the stands for moral support. Thats not to say she cant be involved, now I wanna write a short story of Melody being his "lovely assistant" for his magic tricks. Just cause I like how him and Clockwork look together and think its cute doesnt mean im gonna force that pairing without backing it up. I write Melody and Presto all the time even though I dont personally agree with it.
>>25957797
>And Solitaire too, love her design.
Did we ever get a face for her? I only have this pic
