You are at Pinkie Pie's party. You are also the only male there. However the girls all respect you and there is a good chance you might get some tonight if you play your cards right. You have just been forced to take the massivest shit ever, which has left feces all across your buttcrack. Fortunately there is plenty of toilet paper for you to use.
>See this
>What do?
>>25633159
Knock it off and use the toilet paper.
>Being afraid of spiders
Wimp.
>>25633161
>Knocking it off before using the toilet paper
Wimp.
Shoo it away, because they are harmless and cute and are going to get eaten by a frog anyway, one of natures dumbest creations.
Man, just ask Fuzzy Legs to move. He's a chill dude as long as he don't know you trying to get with Maud.
>>25633174
Pretty sure spiders are the smartest bug or some shit
>>25633195
I think me meant frogs are one of nature's dumbest creations.
>>25633203
Wouldn't that make them dumber than Frogs?
>>25633159
They seem sentiment there, threaten him.
>>25633172
>>25633161
>Using the toilet paper at all
Wimps.
>>25633261
Yeah, just use the spider.
>>25633159
wipe my ass with the spider, obv
Guess I'm adding shit covered spiders to my list of fears
>>25633159
>Looks at spider first.
>Seems big and harmful, takes anything I can find before smashing it away and paralyzing it.
>Use toilet paper
Win.
>>25633261
>Not putting the spider on your balls and feeling its legs climb up your shaft.
>Not letting it bite you to paralyse your dick.
>Not letting your dick get wrapped in a silk cocoon.
>Not letting the spider drink out your fluids through your cocooned cock.
Get on my level.
>>25633159
Try to talk the spider to get out, I need my privacy, I don't go to the restroom to feel raped by insects for God's sake.
>>25633311
nty
>>25633311
Trip..Dubs...confirm?
>>25633161
>>25633172
>>25633261
>>25633271
>>25633311
Never change, /mlp/
>>25633159
Move it aside knowing that bananahush would yell at me for squishing it.
Also it's the tiny spiders that are more venomous anyway.
>>25633159
>2015
>actually still using toilet paper
>not being a member of the wet wipes master race
>not using superior hygiene products that clean better than a shitty piece of dry paper
Use my wet wipes and go about my day getting some of that pony poon.
>>25633159
>Not befriending based spiderbro
>Not letting it keep your house free of other spiders and insects
'Straya.
DESIGNATED
>>25633159
>eat the spider to gain it's life-force
>wipe ass, wash hands
>use the sudden boost of power level it gave me to fuck bitches all night long
>>25633159
>make the spider give me a blowjob
>make it bite my dick to give myself superpowers
>use spiderdick to fuck everyone with superdick stamina
Tell fluttershy there's a friend of hers in the bathroom
>>25634504
SHITTING
>>25634533
This Anon is the only one getting EqG booty tonight. Solid plan.
>>25633159
>Make eye contact with the spider
>Start masturbating
>>25633159
>Call Fluttershy in to help you.
>Wipe butt with pony.
>Take spider home for some squishy, chitinous lovin'.
>Afterward she eats you and you never get to meet the abomination that is your offspring.
>Doesn't matter had sex.
>>25634473
Spiders are bros alright. But I wouldn't touch one, not because they're gross but because they'll probably freak out and chomp on your hand before running. Then you got a hand that's melting almost down to the bone because Australian spiders, that's why.
>>25634546
STREETS
>>25633159
Knock both the spider and toilet paper way, and shove the toilet paper holder in ass
>>25633159
Spders are cute, give her the controller so she can play too
>>25633159
Nigga you're a horse, just eat that motherfucker yo
>>25635017
I fucking love tarantulas. Too bad they like to aim they butts at you and start shedding their potentially permanent blinding hairs at you if they get stressed out.
Planned on raising one, but that sounded kind of risky.
>>25633203
Well the French are pretty dumb but that's rude.
>>25635051
Get a cobalt tarantula, those things are the fucking bomb and they're blue.
>>25633159
Set the bathroom on fire and escape through the window.
>>25635091
I swear, I think when I was a little fag I spooked one in a bush when I reach under for my rubber ball. We both nearly shit ourselves.
Unless there are other small blue animals that live in the suburbs of Florida.
>>25633159
Shoo it off, use toilet paper, afterwards show it to Fluttershy, who probably will be extatic.
>>25635293
Just gave me an idea:
>Anon berates Fluttershy for being scared of everything
>Needs to take a shit
>Goes to bathroom
>Sees big ass spider
>Runs out screaming like a little girl
>Fluttershy investigates bathroom
>Comes out with spider and scolds Anon for scaring the poor, helpless creature
>Spider is all curled up in Fluttershy's mane looking smug as fuck
Cute spiders bump
>>25637090
Forgot pic
>>25633159
Honestly family I don't what I would do in this situation.
I have never encountered a spider this big before and suddenly seeing one right next to me would cause me to start panicking. Unable to move from the toilet, I would just sit there paralyzed with fear and disgusting. Eventually, I would realize my limited options and either pull my pants up, soiling them in the process, go to another bathroom, and finish there, or just kill myself on the spot via consumption of the chemicals under the bathroom sink.
>>25633311
>Not realizing Fluttershy put it there to satisfy Anon's perverse lust for spidercocking.
>>25633311
>>25637334
you people are fucking degenerates
