>"I poisoned your wine, Anon."
>>25464952
it's okay I poisoned your husband.
>>25464952
I don't drink.
>>25464952
I know.
>>25464952
wine?
>>25464952
Too bad this means these will be the last minutes I have in Equestria.
Too bad... for you.
>>25464952
It can't be my wine. I only drink beer or vodka.
>>25464952
Last night I poinsoned your husband's dick.
Good thing I switched the wine glasses.
>>25464952
That's funny, because I switched our glasses.
So I guess I didn't need that roofie after all!
>>25465056
I poisoned both our glasses Anon, together will be immortal!
That's okay. Over the years I've built up a resistance to iocane powder and most other forms of deadly poisons.
>>25464952
So the pellet with the poison's in the flagon with the dragon but the vessel with the pestle has the brew that is true?
>>25464952
Mare juice isn't poison princess, even with STDs
>>25465079
>>25464952
>Celestia falls over, tongue splayed out of her mouth.
"... Uh, I got a beer."
>Cadence brings both her hooves to her cheeks and squeezes softly
>Who else but Cadence?
>>25464952
jokes on you, I don't drink.
>>25464952
that explains the flavor
>>25465465
nice digits.
>>25465014
So your mouth and your ass are poisoned?
>>25464952
Fuck, I read that as "I poisoned your wife"
That would have been more interesting.
>>25465079
Fuck you. Came here just to post this, and you got here first.Mah nigga.
>>25464952
Haha I poisoned yours as well!
NOOOOOOOOOOO
>>25464952
>Punch her in the face causing her to fall onto the floor
>As she screams grab the wine bottle from the table, and slam half of it against the table
>Hold her in place with my foot on her stomach
>Aim the shattered wine bottle's glassy edges near her throat
>She says she's just kidding with you as make-up from her eyes trail down from her tears
>Bullshit.jpg
>She screams for the guards
>Guards burst in with their spears and shit
>Throw the rest of your wine bottle onto Candyass's face as you scream your people's song
>The guards throw their weapons at you, but your fat bounces them right back into their urethras
>Shining Armor sobs as he holds his wife's body in his hooves
>“Anon, she's was just kidding!”
>You look at your next prey.
>“A-Anon?”
>Turn his sexy ass around as you unzip your micro penis
>He sobs on top of Candyass's corpse as you proceed to spread his white cheeks with your Cheetos-stained hands
>You dive your dick in as you imeddiately cum literal torrents of cum inside his virgin anus
>You pull out and collapse your fat body on the floor as you wheeze
>You sweat from that much over exertion, and you smell like moldy cheese and marinara
>Twaifu walks in with sobbing like mad
>“Anon, they were just playing with you!”
“Oh. Never mind.”
So the tomato floating in my wine isn't some weird horse custom?
>>25466176
Stop.
>>25464952
"Too bad I built up a resistance to iocaine powder.
It was in both goblets, by the way."
*thud goes the dead pony princess on the floor*
"I knew she couldn't resist watching The Princess Bride."
Too bad my evade stat's so high.
>Anon dodges the poison
>>25465079
You stole the joke I was going to make, you little shit.
>>25465000
>Not peppermint schnapps
>>25464952
Oh hey, thanks for warning me.
>>25468378
Oh so HE stole the joke from YOU and not from a movie. I see now.
>>25464952
Yeah, my pip boy literally displayed it as "poisoned wine" for some reason
You HIGHLY underestimate my body's ability to metabolize toxins.
>>25468361
Under-rated post
>>25464952
>Alexander in equestria
>>25464952
How exhilarating!
>>25464952
Fucking hell, I'll go call a fucking ambulance, and if it turns out I'm really poisoned no more of that Game of Thrones shit for you.
Do horses die if they eat chocolate?
>>25464952
With aphrodisiac, I assume?
>>25468793
It would be extremely painful
>>25464952
TU QUOQUE, CADENCE?
>>25466018
Glad someone around here has some taste
>>25464952
Thank god, a legit excuse to no longer be in your presence.
I never drink... Wine.
>>25466018
Scrolled through just to see if someone did this. You did God's work, Anon.
>>25464952
Wine is poison.......whore
How is this thread still alive?
>>25474142
The same reason Anon's still alive after his wine got poisoned.A high evade stat
>>25474142
Very slow acting poison. Kills you by causing cancer.
>>25464952
And your horsbando drank it. Goddamnit, Condense, one of these days I'm going to stop dragging his sorry ass to the hospital.
