PREVIOUSLY ON THE CRIMES AGAINST NATURE PROGRAM
>>25265499
>What is this thread about?
Half human and half pony/other Equestrian species offspring.
>What are the rules?
There are no thread specific rules, do what you want.
>What is the continuity (world/characters/attributes)?
Whatever you want it to be. Everything is a variable, there are no absolutes. Characters, names, genders, personalities, relationships, backgrounds, writing style, genre. If you want to know the common headcanons of certain characters, read some stories or ask the thread.
Searchable Archive:
http://anonpone.pineapplecomputing.com/search/?tags=satyr
Story by Parent:
http://pastebin.com/qFf46ep5 (embed)
Author List:
http://pastebin.com/RFgtrECq (embed)
Satyrs by Parent:
http://pastebin.com/uBqbm6eq (embed)
Dropbox
https://www.dropbox.com/sh/d94jlx7pgl5gg34/AABM4w-okI70GyrbCsVNee9Ga?dl=0
Need some proofing done? Or want to throw ideas around?
Add one of the Skypes below!
[NEEDS UPDATING]
>>25325852
Is there a full nude edit of this?
>>25330592
Sadly, no. Just the lingerie covered version
>>25330566
looks like her legs have melted
>>25330631
Having pitch black "skin" doesn't mix well with shadows... On the other hand, all those extra holes... https://derpiboo.ru/877294?scope=scpe13418e3342a7916149d209ed4808e01ca319e6e1
>>25330657
It's not really skin, I guess it would be more like chitin? Or some sort of smooth black leathery hide. Whatever changelings have.
>>25330676
Does it matter?
>>25330712
Not particularly, it's just an interesting thing to ponder.
>>25330712
... Dj should do more of these
>>25330833
Yes, that's very unf.
Are you too retarded to keep it in one thread?
>>25330563
>>25330934
This OP pic is better
Sterks did a Ivy
>>25330676
Huh, you think that chitin chafes in bed? Like Turians, only with cute bug girls.
>>25331311
In what way do you mean?
If it chafes her, or chafes you while sleeping with her?
>>25331326
Chafes her partner. If it chafed HER, then I'm pretty sure that would be a cause for concern. Like if sitting still caused your back to chafe against your skin.
>>25330942
That's your opinion.
>>25331335
I don't see why it would chafe you. It's not like you're wearing her on you or anything. If it's chitin, it's probably fairly smooth and firm.
Reminder that this thread should die out as the other one has more responses and having two active ones at the same time makes us look like autists.
>>25331377
Oh, I meant during sex. Two bodies rubbing against each other.
What are the most cute and comfy greens this thread has to offer?
>>25331408
Hmm, depends. Do you mean cute and comfy like romance, cute and comfy like sibling love (not pervy), or cute and comfy like parental love?
>>25331402
Nah, I imagine her pussy would have to be a bit softer in order to allow her partner entry without chafing. As for the rest, I would imagine not more so than with two humans having sex for hours. Go on long enough, and you'll probably get chafed.
Also, if chafing was an issue, you could always just rub lube on whichever of her chitinous parts chafed.
>>25331445
For some reason, reading this felt more cute than lewd.
>Radiance massaging lotion into Mistake's thighs before having some slow and sweet sex in the missionary position.
... Daw
Guys, does anyone know who drew pic related?
Anybody want a milkshake?
>>25331525Do Daily or Nobby still lurk?
Is it a good thing or bad that these two don't get as much... "spotlight" as other couples?
>>25331426
Parent (no incest)
>>25331720
>No incest
Well, when you mentioned "cute and comfy", assumed. Anyway, here's a few I would recommend.
Kinda long with a lot of focus on the kids: http://pastebin.com/NDnikcX8
More parts, but you'll have to look through his pastebin for them: http://pastebin.com/xW2P7ECJ
Makes you think incest, but does NOT go through with it: http://pastebin.com/yzKcJ2r9
Unless you have a pet peeve of people saying "poppa" instead of "papa", this one should be a nice series of shorts: http://pastebin.com/mPBvXLnU
Gets naughty at the end: http://pastebin.com/hyA9F7RK
What did she do?
>>25331847
She cannot tell a lie. In a fit of jealousy at the attention her much younger cousin was getting for planting her first apple tree, she cut it down. She sincerely apologizes, wishes Cider would forgive her, and awaits punishment...Also, she smashed, like, two barrels of apples with the axe afterwards for funsies.
>>25331865
>>25331847
Darcy can't help but go a little crazy from time to time.
Cut it down, cut it down!
Can't hold it back any more.
Cut it down, cut it down!
Turn away and smash the door.
>>25331917
>Darcy going through her "Thorn" years
>Thorn herself watches it as a babby(?)
>This is where she gets the idea to be hardcore
Darcy, you're setting a bad example that will have lasting effects.
>>25331847
I like the idea of mischievous Darcy.
>>25332016
Mischievous crazy, mischievous nauuughty (like that one guy from Courage the Cowardly god), or mischievous pranker?
>>25332067
I was thinking getting a kick out of destroying something for no particular reason other than that it's fun mischievous. Maybe even slightly sadistic, taking delight in others' shock and annoyance when they see the damage she did.
>>25332086
Or wearing scandalously short short shorts in front of her uncle Anon.Short.
>>25332141
That too. But that came later, when her mind started to become occupied with other things than transforming the furniture into firewood.
>anthro
>>25332141
>"Hey uncle, is that a wrench in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? Because I actually do need a wrench."
>>25332201
Is this new? Looks good.
>>25332201
"You can use my wrench any day, babe."
>>25332193
>Anthro
>>25332201
>Anon walks up behind her and places a firm slap on her behind, cupping her ass.
"No, that'd be my boner, but I can get you a wrench if you'd like."
>Darcy smirks and rolls her eyes, having got used to the man's unorthodox ways of showing affection long ago.
>"Thank you, Uncle, that'd be much apprec-"
"But I'll want something in return."
>Anon slipped a thumb into the waistband of her shorts and winked at her.
>"M-Misericordioso!"
>Several seconds passed before Anon began laughing unexpectedly, pulling away from the satyr.
"Ha ha, wow. You're as fun as ever to tease, kid. I'll go get you that wrench."
>>25332393
Why you messing with Darcy, mang? She all shy and blushy and shit. Maaaang
>>25332682
That's just the way her Uncle Anon is. He has odd ways of showing affection that may seem inappropriate to some, but rest assured that he'll break the legs of anybody that hurts his beloved niece.Any rumours of him having been a cartel enforcer on Earth are pure slander and totally unfounded.
>>25332682
You guys ever miss the old writefags? Drinking and feeling nostalgic.
>>25332760
All the time, mostly because they would either bring GOOD smut that would get the horny bastards satisfied for a while ir family stuff that would just... Feel great. Now, off topic.
>pic relatedWould you waifu coffee horse?
Anyone still here? Need help with a headcanon regarding Minotaurs. Would you say they have russian accents, fitting with the whole husky giants thing, or nah?
>>25333191
They sound like uneducated scum with the vocabulary of six year olds, so yes, I suppose Russian would be okay.
>>25333220
>So much hate
Who hurt you, Anon? Was it a Minotaur?
>>25332863
Das a big butt. Yes.
We need more mer stuff
>>25334440
I'd like them more if Aria's children had names to match Sonata's and Adagio's themes. Adagio's are based on classical music terminology, Sonata's are based off the sea, nut then Aria's based off of the two band members off of an obscure death metal band? It's pretty haring.
>>25334513
Huh? Aria's are after the ocean, Sonata's are a ref to Pokemon and a band, and Adagio's are a music terminology and a singer for a band.
>>25334580
That just makes it even more disjointed and chaotic then.
>Birthday in Equestria
>Setting the timer for the snacks, you move to go check on the girls' present when you hear a groan.
>Moving to the living room, you see Timber hiding a can of silly string behind his back, Fluttershy squealing as he fakes another grunt.
>With a soft smile, you watch Rose walk to him.
>"Mom? Is Timber okay?"
>You can see the small smile on her face, causing you to snicker.
>Fluttershy goes to examine her son as you hear steps come up behind you.
>"Heh..."
>Ace.
>She leans in.
>"I taught him this."
>Continuing to hide, you watch Timber fake a gag.
>"Ohhh, mom, I don't-"
>He pulls back, brings his silly string in front of his mouth, and looks to Rose
>"HUURRBLAAAAAGH!"
>You snort as your little girl screams, hands in front of her face as she smiles.
>"Ewwww! M-Mooom! Haha!"
>Fluttershy gasps and gives her son a stern look, not happy at the lil prank.
"Oh boy."
>Ace steps out.
>"Timber, are you- HURK!"
>She reaches into her back pocket and pulls out two cans, spraying Timber and Rose.
>"BLAAAAH!"
>The three kids just laugh, Rose running to hug Timber's side, hiding behind him to avoid the spray.
>Ace hands a can to Rose, who meekly takes it before spraying her.
>Timber sprays Rose, Ace sprays Timber, and Rose sprays Ace.
>Thus,the cycle of shooting is completed.
>As they keep doing this, Fluttershy's annoyed look softens.
>No one is looking, so you resume your check up.
>Giving a quick look around, you open the closet door as quietly as possible.
"One, two, three, four..."
>Moving one of the bigger presents out of the way, you see Rose's.
"Five."
>Good, everyone's presents are here for Flora and Fauna.
>Food is ready to be grilled, snacks are being prepared, and the entertainment is on his way.
>Perfect.
>Closing the door, you move to the staircase.
"Flora! Fauna! Ivy! are you all ready?"
>You hear a door open and quickly slam shut, two sets of hooves running coming from above.
1/12
>>25335023
>Soon, the two girls are rushing down the stairs in matching dresses.
>Opening your arms, they jump into them.
"AAAAAH!"
>You hug them, lifting them up and lightly shaking left and right.
>The two five year-olds laugh, holding on tight.
>Setting them down, Flora lets go, but Fauna clings.
>"Again! One more time!"
>Chuckling, you re-grab Flora and do a quick shake hug.
>Letting them down, they run to the living room.
>You chuckle as you see the damage.
>Some string on the couch, definitely on the kids, and even some on the banner.
>Moving towards the culprits, you extend a hand.
"Can I see one of those?"
>Rose is the first to offer her can.
>Rubbing her head, you take it.
>You decide to finish the job, giving the banner a nice little design.
"Hmm. thoughts?"
>Ace rubs her chin.
>"Well, it's simple."
>The 14 year-old girl knows not how simple it is to please kids.
>Timber tries to spray as well, but his string barely hits the bottom, leaving a "web" under on part.
>"Oops."
>You chuckle.
"Eh, gives it character."
>Your son smiles at this.
>Handing the can back to Rose, you peck her forehead.
"Thank you, sweetie."
>She waits a moment before spraying your face.
>Eyes closed, you still smile.
>The twins laugh at this, hugging your legs.
>Wiping off the string, you try to walk with the two leg weights.
>They cling, making sure to hold on tight.
>Moving to the kitchen, you see Fluttershy getting some pony food ready.
>Between the two of you, you've covered every base.
>... Hopefully.
>Every base.
>Covered.
>Watching with the other adults as the kids play tag outside, you can see Pinkie and her husband coming up the hill.
>Meaning their kids aren't far behind.
>Pogo is the first of their kids to come into view, carrying two BIG boxes.
>You're almost worried what he got them.
>Next come Mumble, Fiddle, and Faddle.
>Pinkie's twins are being held by back their older sister, who has a hand on each head.
>The two pink girls are carrying a thing box each.
2/12
>>25335045
>As you watch, it once again dawns on you how spoiled your kids are going to get today.
>Four times every year.
>You always forget until the actual day, but you eventually remember.
>Waving to the family, Pinkie bounces to wave back as her husband returns the simple gesture.
>Soon, the couple are in front of you all.
>Pinkie bounces to hug you, then Fluttershy.
>"Sorry we're late! Pogo needed help getting his presents aaall wrapped up!"
>Speaking of, the boy in question drop the presents with the others.
>Yet they are falling as if in slow motion.
>What did he put in them?
>As you question that, you hear a squeal from the kids.
>Quickly turning back, you see Fiddle and Faddle rushing Flora and Fauna.
>The two pairs of twins meet in a jumping hug, your girls lifting them up slightly in the air.
>You chuckle.
>Those two just love their twin friends.
>As you watch the sight, you hear a soft throat clear.
>Turning to face it, you see Mumble, plain faced and standing tall.
>"Hello, Mr. Shy."
>You nod, knowing where this is going.
"Well hello, Mumble."
>She takes a moment to respond.
>"Not to seem rude, but is-"
>You point to the house.
"Inside playing Mario Kart with Ace."
>You see a very soft lip twitch.
>"I see, thank you."
>She excuses herself then walks inside.
>You chuckle.
>Nothing like watching a childhood crush.
>All the cuteness of a regular one without the drama.
>Turning back to the kids, you see Pogo leading the kids in a game.
>It's an adorable sight.
>Looking at the time, you figure you'll give them another fifteen minutes before calling out the entertainment.
>Laughing, you and the rest of the adults watch as the small kids chase around "Venom".
>Your brother made it clear you owed him for this.
>Your sister-in-law made it clear you did not.
>Watching this, you KNOW you owe him.
>He continues to run, his wife still pretending to be hurt.
>You can see her costume shake and jump a bit.
>She's enjoying this as much as you are.
3/12
>>25335070
>Sighing, finally calming down, you see Pogo jump for him.
>He misses, but does a front flip, landing in front of him.
>Your brother tries to brake, but to no avail.
>He slides right into a bear hug and is brought down.
>Soon all the kids; pony, human, and satyr are holding down Venom.
>You can hear Pogo calling from the center of the pile.
>"WE GOT HIM! WE GOT HIM! SOMEONE CALL THE COPS!"
>A few of the parents get their laughing fit back, but you remain calm.
>Sighing, you decide to go check on the kids inside.
>Stepping into Timber's room, you can see it is very full.
>Many of the older kids who didn't want to play with the smaller ones are piled in.
"You all okay in here?"
>You are met with a near chorus of content.
>Icarus seems to be the only one to speak out.
>"Can we get some more snacks?"
"Give it a few minutes. Still cooking."
>Darn kids finished everything you had within a couple hours
>You didn't take into account the many kids going through growth spurts.
>All those stuffed mushrooms, lil pizza pockets, flavored popcorns; devoured.
>You aren't making the same mistake with dinner, you pulled out a number of extra steaks.
>Too many steaks.
>You pulled out too many steaks.
>How could you forget that a lot of the kids are vegetarian?
>Still, your brother doesn't seem to mind.
>His wife hugs him, hands wrapped around his waist, head leaning into his chest.
>He sighs, returning the hug.
>You know deep down some part of him enjoyed being chased by kids.
>Finishing up the last of the grilling, you set the meat aside and go to find your babies.
>The birthday girls are surrounded by their friends, talking about cartoons and games.
>Ivy is keeping an eye on her brother, who is following Ace around like a lost puppy.
>You know she doesn't mind it too much, but you are worried he might get too attached.
>Memories of your first crush on an older girl flood back.
>For a kid, the ending is never fun.
4/12
>>25335086
>Looking for Rose, she is following Timber, trying to sheepishly avoid bumping into anyone.
>Your wife is with her friends, talking about what, you're not sure.
>Leaving you all by your lonesome.
>That is until a hand places itself on your shoulder.
>Turning back, you are met with a hug, followed by another.
>Your brother and his wife are in front of you.
>"It's been fun, but we gotta get going."
>You look to the sun, just barely setting.
"You sure? You'll miss the birthday cake."
>He chuckles, an arm wrapped around your sister-in-law's shoulder.
>"Yeah. Traffic going through border patrol is going to be hell in a couple hours. We don't wanna be there for that. Got work in the morning, you know?"
>You sigh, knowing better.
"All right, see you for Thanksgiving, all right?"
>He nods, turning to go say his good byes to the kids.
>Walking away, he waves without looking.
>"Take care, lil brother."
>You're gonna miss that scruffy bastard.
>Gently bringing the lighter to the last candle, you hear the crowd start.
"Haaappy birthday, to you. Happy birthday, to you."
>You look around, smiling at the sight.
>True, many of the adults here were only parents of your daughters' friends, but still so many of your own friends are here.
>It's nice, seeing a crowd like this again.
>"Happy birthday, to, you!"
>The two girls both blow out two candles, then share the last one.
>There is a light applause and cheering.
>Soon, your wife leans over to cut them each a slice of cake.
>As she does the same for each of the guests who want one, the girls devour the slices in front of them.
>You know exactly why.
>The moment the cake is finished, they rush for the presents.
>Some parents would say that letting them act like this is bad parenting.
>Those parents can eat a dick.
>Let your little girls enjoy their birthday, before it just becomes another day in the year.
>They deserve it.
>Shaking off that thought, you watch as they literally jump on top of Pogo's presents.
5/12
>>25335106
>They struggle to get the bow off, but when they do...
>The box BLOWS open.
>Balloons and confetti filling the air.
>Squealing, the two girls giggle as they pull the boxes over, more confetti spilling out.
>Pulling out their gifts, you watch, curious.
>Inside each box is a pair of skates and safety gear.
>They run to hug Pogo, thanking him profusely.
>Chuckling as they continue to rip open presents, you move towards your wife.
>Hugging her from behind, she leans into you.
>Flora and Fauna react with excitement at each gift.
>You wonder if your parents felt this way, this little pit of warmth.
>Stretching, you watch as Pinkie Pie and her family get ready to leave.
>Flora and Fauna give Fiddle and Faddle a hug each, thanking them for coming,
>Mumble gives Timber a quick hug and says that she'll see him tomorrow, quickly moving towards her parents.
>Pogo lifts Ivy up into a bear hug, making your daughter look uncomfortable.
>Holding Rose in your hands, the girl is getting sleepy.
>Moving towards the door, you shake Pinkie's husband's hand.
"Thanks for coming."
>He nods, holding a plate with cake slices in his hand.
>"Any time. See you all in December."
>You nod, watching the Pie family depart.
>With a soft smile, you close the door.
>Fluttershy, Ivy, Timber, and Ace are already cleaning up.
>Flora and Fauna are playing.
>As soon as you put this sleepy girl to bed, you'll help out your wife.
>THEN put the birthday girls to bed too.
>As you walk upstairs, Rose grumbles.
>She doesn't say anything you can make out, but you know she's fighting sleep.
>Putting into bed fully clothed, she curls up on her bed.
>Stroking her cheek, you cover her up.
"Night sweetie. I love you."
>You peck her head, then head downstairs to help clean up.
>Shuffling a few more bit bills into your hand, you count them out.
>You already promised Ace extra for helping out the whole day, but she REALLY helped out.
>So a little extra on extra wouldn't be too bad.
6/12
>>25335119
>Still cheaper than catering.
>Ace counts the bills and is about to speak when you put your wallet away.
>She chuckles and smiles.
>"Wow, thanks Mr. Shy."
>You wave it off.
"You earned it. Thank you for the help, Ace."
>She nods.
>"It's no problem. I like babysitting your kids."
>With a soft smile, you point back.
"Want some cake before you leave?"
>She shakes her head.
>"Nah, wouldn't be able to carry it and fly at the same time."
>As she steps into the night, you see her turn away.
>"See you later, Mr. Shy!"
>With a hop, she takes off.
>Sighing, you stretch.
>Closing the door, you walk inside when you hear some thumps.
>Waiting, you hear more thumps.
"What in the...?"
>Ivy and Timber walk into the living room, looking as confused as you are.
>After a moment, there is a knock on your door.
>Oh... you know who it is.
>Going to open it, there is a hulk of Minotaur in front of you.
>"Ahhh! Friend Anon!"
>You are grabbed into a hug.
>Grunting out, you give a forced chuckle.
"He-Heh, hey, Butch... crushing..."
>He lets go, hands raised.
>"Ohh, my bad, my bad. I did not mean to be hurting you."
>Stepping back, you try to get the feeling back in your arms, smiling all the while.
"It's fine, I know you-"
>Timber interrupts, running.
>"Uncle Butch!"
>He jumps into Butches chest, getting an equally crushing hug.
>"Ahhh! Little Timber! Not so little anymore, eh?!"
>He laughs out loud holding your son.
>Timber can take it a LOT better than you, with his horse half's pain tolerance.
>As Butch lets your son go, his daughter steps out from behind him.
>The little Minotaur girl waves, wearing her usual overalls.
>Timber's smile widens.
>"Holly!"
>Repeating his jump to Butch, he goes much softer, hugging his old friend.
>"Heh, hi, Timber. Did we miss the party?"
>You nod.
"Sorry, we ended a couple hours ago."
>Butch leans down, entering your house.
>"What? Why so early? Bah, is barely even dark."
>He stands tall, looking around.
7/12
>>25335132
>"Now, where are little friends? Uncle Butch has presents and hugs to give."
>You shake your head.
"Sorry, the little ones are in bed. Just me, Timber, Fluttershy, and Ivy."
>Turning to look at Ivy, she is missing.
"Uhhh... Ivy?"
>She comes out of the kitchen, wearing a suit of what looks like make-shift hug armor.
>Butch just laughs it off.
>"Ahh, uncle Butch is being too strong a hugger for you, yeah? Is okay, no hug. I do not want to hurt friend Ivy."
>Ivy gulps and shakes her head, taking quick steps to hug the Minotaur.
>He sighs and pats her back.
>"Heh, I am sorry. I know, I know I am too strong for my own good."
>Fluttershy eventually walks out of the kitchen.
>Even with her knees shaking, she smiles sincerely.
>"H-Hi Butch. It's a little late, isn't it?"
>He snorts, smiling, no longer patting Ivy's back.
>"For you."
>Standing, you can feel everything again.
"For most kids. How long are you in town for, Butch?"
>He looks to you, still smiling.
>"Holly and I will be here tonight and tomorrow all the way until the afternoon. If it's so late, it is okay if we come again tomorrow, yeah?"
>You nod.
"Of course. For now, we were all getting ready for bed."
>Butch nods.
>"Is okay, you all go to bed."
>He grins, looking to Timber and Ivy.
>"You uncle Butch is going to go and paint the town red with excitement!"
>Timber chuckles, hugging him, then his daughter again.
>"Yeah! You'll be here when I get out of school, right?"
>Holly nods.
>"Mhmm. Our train does not come until four. You will be out by then?"
>Timber nods, hugging her again.
>"Yep!"
>Butch pats Timber's back.
>"Okay then, we have another party tomorrow, for uncle Butch being here."
>You nod.
"Sounds good. See you later, Butch."
>You go over and hug the guy again.
>This time, instead of crushing you, he pats your back.
>"We will be back tomorrow! Have good sleep, friends.
>As Butch leaves, you cross your arms happily.
>Butcher Milk.
>You owe that old bastard more than you can remember.
8/12
>>25335143
>"Oh, thank GOD."
>Your smile soon fades.
>"I thought he would never leave."
>Letting off another sigh, this one weary, you look around for anything off.
>There are two extra chairs.
"Come on out, Discord."
>There is a disheartened scoff.
>"Well, you're no fun."
>Walking to Fluttershy, you place your hand on her back.
>Soon, the two extra chairs change shape into Discord and his daughter.
>The little one floats over to your son, a wry smile on her lips.
>"Hi, Timber."
>He shakes a bit, leaning back as she gets closer.
>"H-Ello, Kaos."
>Discord chuckles.
>"Oh, looks like the sins of the father pass on to the son."
>Timber looks to the side of Kaos.
>"Huh?"
>He chuckles. floating over to you and Fluttershy, completely ignoring Ivy.
>"Oh, nothing. Just expect to be VERY popular when you get taller."
>The Draconequus quickly turns his attention to you and Fluttershy.
>"Pardon our late visit. It's just, well, I heard two of my FAVORITE nieces were having a birthday today, and as much as I wanted to see them..."
>He chuckles, looking to Fluttershy.
>"Well, you know how I hate sharing time."
>Your wife just smiles.
>You know she doesn't see what you see, you know she just sees "Discord the super reformed villain", and you know she isn't interested in him...
>It just still feels like a constant battle with him.
"What do you want, Discord? The girls are asleep."
>He nods, smile fading to a professional hold.
>"Yes yes, but I sadly can't come back tomorrow... unlike your Minotaur friend."
>The Draconequus looks to you.
>"However, I did want to make sure they got their gifts."
>He opens one hand, showing it is empty, then the other, also empty.
>Closing them, he opens them again to show too boxes.
>One with flowers engraved into it, the other with small critters.
>They open to reveal a pair of glasses and butterfly hairpin respectively.
>"Two VERY special gifts for the birthday girl."
>He then grins, a third hand appearing.
9/12
>>25335158
>This one opens to reveal a box with a rose imprinted on it.
>"One for our poor forgotten middle child."
>It opens to reveal a moderately sized vial of black nail polish.
>Yet another hand appears.
>"And last, a gift for... well."
>The first three hands disappear, leaving you to quickly grab the boxes.
>Discord floats over to Ivy.
>He takes both her hands in one of his.
>"Our sweet little first born. Like mother like daughter."
>Once again, Ivy looks uncomfortable.
>Discord places his last hand over hers, then lightly lets go.
>When she opens them, there is a seed.
>As Ivy looks confused, he leans in.
>"Plant this outside your house tonight."
>Furrowing your brow, you let go of your wife and step to Ivy's side.
"You know, there was a story like this. It ended with a giant nearly killing a kid."
>Ivy squeals, hiding behind you.
>Discord chuckles.
>"Oh, come now. There won't be any beanstalks or-... well, giant humans."
>That in no way helps.
>About to speak, Timber beats you to it.
>"Um, do I get anything?"
>Discord chuckles.
>"Hmm, well, Kaos had a gift she wanted to give you."
>Looking to your son, you see Kaos lean in to give him a little kiss.
>Timber's cheeks turn a dark shade of red.
>Kaos giggles.
>"It was my first kiss. Not yours though?"
>Before Timber can respond, Discord groans, looking to his hand.
>He pulls the fur back to reveal bare skin and a watch.
>"Oh darn. Looks like our time is up. Come, Kaos! Your, eugh, mother awaits."
>Kaos pouts, a frown crossing her lips.
>"Oh... okay."
>She forces a smile and hugs Timber while still floating.
>"Byeee, Timber."
>The girl gives him another kiss on the cheek and then poofs away.
>Looking to Discord, you are about to speak when he turns away.
>"Tata, Fluttershy."
>He then poofs away as well.
>Scowling, you hear Ivy squeal.
>You turn to her, panic in your eyes.
>"It moved!"
>Taking it, you hug her.
>Holding it, you can feel it shake a bit.
"I'll handle this..."
10/12
>>25335168
>Moving to the door, you are gonna crush this thing in the backyard.
>You don't want to risk anything happening to the house, considering this IS chaos magic.
>As you leave, you can hear Fluttershy talking to Timber.
>"So... you kissed someone?"
>Timber is quick to reply.
>"Huh? N-No! That was- no!"
>Sighing, you think Kaos might have said that just to screw with your son.
>She is a good kid, or you thought she was, but hanging around her dad...
>Discord is not the best influence.
>Moving deeper into your VERY open back yard, you drop the seed.
>Looking back, the house is very tiny from here.
>Good.
>Raising your foot, you feel something... off.
>The seed moves a bit more, this time slower.
>There is a small sprout cracking from it.
"... Dammit..."
>Taking a knee, you look at the seed.
>It is shaking.
>As you watch, you hear a tiny noise.
>It almost sounds like a cry.
>After a few tense moments, you sigh.
>Looking for some loose dirt, you dig a hole.
>Worst case scenario, you end up with a giant bean stalk that you cut down.
>Best, this gift turns out to be something Ivy will like.
>After you lightly bury it, you go to grab the hose.
>As you water it, the sprout grows more, almost as thick as a quarter now.
>You're REALLY hoping you won't regret this.
>Day Of Birth in Equestria.
>Feeling a nice wave rock you back and forth, you look over the ship. Fluttershy by your side.
>The two of you are watching the horizon, your kids... around.
>Something.
>You don't know.
>You're just enjoying the sight.
>"Earthquake!"
>What?
>"Earthquake!"
>At sea?
>"Dad!"
>You are shaken awake.
>Timber is on top of you.
"Wha?..."
>There is a tugging on the ground, like a small Earthquake.
>"Dad, Earthquake!"
>Can't be.
>As your wife wakes up, you rub your eyes.
>An Earthquake would be bigger, less constant.
>Slowly waking up, you realize what it could be.
"Oh f- wait here."
>You jump out of bed, grab some pants, and run outside.
11/12
>>25335189
>Moving to the back yard, the sprout is now the size of a mini palm tree!
>Too small to be causing the shaking.
>As you look around, you hear what sounds like a baby bird.
>As you look around, you see the sprout rising.
>It shakes, thumping up, pulling the dirt with it.
>Soon, your family is outside with you.
>They get by your side just in time to be confused with you.
>Ivy grabs your hand.
>"Dad, is that the seed?"
>You nod, watching as you hear a MUCH louder baby bird call.
>The sprout pulls up, looking like a giant mudball.
>"Ah-ah-ah."
>That talks!
>Letting go of Ivy's hand, you walk towards it.
>The sprout is moving it's sides, trying to pull out.
>It's mouth quivers as it calls.
"Uh... huh?"
>You reach down, lightly touching it.
>It just calls again.
>The thing FELT solid.
"..."
>Touching it slowly, you try and lift it.
>With a few soft tugs, you can see it pulling up earth in a muddy mess.
>Pulling once more, this time with some feeling, mud explodes down.
>The thing shakes, legs waggling.
>Fluttershy gasps.
>"It's a baby!"
>She runs over and makes you put it down.
>"Ohhh, the poor thing..."
>It looks almost like a sideways snowman made of mud, with the head for a behind.
>Its legs are made of rock, while top half looks muddy.
>As you watch it, it begins to sniff, nipping at the ground beneath it.
>Looking into its mouth, you don't see any teeth.
"What... what?"
>The thing shakes its, what you're assuming, head, showing two little nubs over it's tiny mouth.
>Ivy steps over to it, giving a soft giggle.
>"Heh... it's kinda cute, isn't it?"
>A little, but mostly it's confusing.
"Yeah, but what is it?"
>It seems to sniff a bit, looking around until it starts crawling to you.
>Soon, it sniffs you, licking your shoe.
>"Aww, it likes you, dad."
>Yes, but what IS it?
>Ivy tugs your arm.
>"C-Can we keep him?"
>You look back to it.
>The thing is still licking your shoe.
"... Sure."
12/12
>>25335202
Might do a small sequel later.
>>25335202
Took the first half was kind of confusing and felt clunky, which kinda confuses me as to why that was mostly fixed in the second half. Also took me a minute to realize who the fuck Holly is.
>>25335168
Does young Kaos still have her boob wraps or does she use an actual shirt?
>>25336261
What do you think?
>>25336583
I think Kaos looks better in actual clothes.
>>25331060
Ivy gained some meat on her bones
>>25332755
kek
>>25337012
She's the daughter of chaos.
Sometimes she'll wear clothes, sometimes she won't.
>>25335202
>>25335217
That'd be great to see
Welp. Time to migrate to this thread
>>25335202
Okay, a few thoughts on this. You didn't put any name to it, and no PBlink, so I'm gonna have to apologise if you already know any of this stuff:
1 - I liked it. You pre-wrote, and your writing was good. You avoided a lot of common errors (repeated line starts being the same >he, >he, >he, etc), and there weren't any obvious typos that jumped out at me.
2 - however, you wrote a multi anon story. These can get confusing, fast. And this one did. You also introduced characters not before seen (Butch and his kid, unless I'm just not up to them appearing in the new season yet), but not being the main characters of the story. This also can confuse issues.Also, who was Rose? I thought Fluttershy's kids were Timber, Ivy, Thorn, Flora and Fauna, which meant introducing a new one got confusing. I figured it was Rose, but she doesn't appear in the masterlist, and I really CBA remembering every satyr ever.
But yeah, cool story bro
>Day 722 In Manehattan Maximum Security Penitentiary
>Your cellmate/prison bitch won't shut up about the Minotaur in cell 86B.
>He's been going on now for almost ten whole minutes and it's getting more than a little annoying.
>"Oh, and another thing, he always hogs the bench press in the yard. What if somebody else wants to use it, huh? Nobody's impressed by his muscles. He's probably just compensating for something."
>Sighing, you realise you're not going to hear the end of this whining for quite some time.
>You close the magazine you were reading and place it on the floor beside your bunk, before sitting up and resting against the wall with your arms behind your head.
"Why do you care? It's not like you ever use the damn thing. About the heaviest thing I've ever seen you lift has been your lunch tray in the canteen."
>Snapshot scoffs, placing his hands on his hips.
>"That's not the point, Anon. He's just so inconsiderate! He's always throwing his weight around and trying to intimidate people, and last Tuesday I know for a fact he was planning on stealing my dessert if it hadn't been for you being there."
>Oh, so that was why Snapshot had been so clingy during lunch that day.
>You shrug.
"Well you know, this is prison. It sort of goes without saying that it attracts guys like that."
>Snapshot frowns.
>"You should kick his ass."
>You roll your eyes.
"Why in the fuck would I want to do that?"
>Making his way over to your bunk, Snapshot sits down beside you and leans over you, trailing a finger up your chest.
>"You could totally do it."
"I know I could, but I'm asking why."
>"I thought you would protect me from the other inmates, but maybe you're not so tough after all. If you can't even bring yourself to fight one little Minotaur then-"
>Grabbing him by the wrists, you roll him off of you so that he's pinned against the mattress.
"Don't get snippy with me, Snappy."
>He pouts.
>"Aww, what's the matter? Did I upset you. What are you gonna do, rape me?"
>>25338874
>What are you gonna do, rape me?
Quote from satyr raped.
Would you Anons pick a fight with Minotaur just to get your prison bitch to shut up?
from the last thread about the most embarasing thing to happen to satyr
>Pogo and Alex sit by one another as the two watch some television.
>During one particular scene, the main character makes a joke as Alex bursts out into unexpected laughter.
>Pogo laughs too as Alex grips her side in joyous pain before accidentally letting one slip.
>Her gaseous slip sputters loud and fast as she stops laughing while her face flushed beet red.
>Pogo continues to laugh oblivious to it or maybe he didn't care, in either case she wasn't gonna ask as scratches her head nervously before awkwardly watching TV again. A small twinge of blush still across her face as neither being it up.
>Today was its the little things kind of day
>>25339171
>Radiance once blew his load in under a minute while fucking Mistake, due to her having got him too excited throughout the day with her constant teasing.
>She laughed it off and said that they could try again in a few minutes, but the memory still makes him cringe.
>Snapshot had to strip off in front of a crowd of people and get searched when coming back from holiday because he was dressed as a girl while his passport listed him as male.
Which satyrs do you think practice polyamory?
>>25338018
Warning, expect it to be about Gizmo.
>>25338833
>Triple dubs
Nice get. (1) I've had a couple years to practice my tact, thank you for the compliment.
(2) I know, I tried my best to avoid that, but it is hard trying to frame a story with two nameless characters. As for the Minotaurs, they aren't in the show, I just wrote a story once with the girl and wanted to include her again.
Lastly, it is Thorn, but as a child she is Rose. Kind of like those goth kids who have normal names, but go as something weird or different. Sterks mentioned as much and I felt it would be a nice little nod.
>>25338874
>>25338889
Giggity
>>25339171
Oh lord, poor girl. We've all been there, or at least in a similar place.
>>25339199
>Premature ejaculation
... Someone get this guy a drink. A few rounds might help him forget.
Ahh, that actually happens, doesn't it? Poor Snapshot probably got some TSA in his A.
>>25339302
In what sense? Open relationships, legitimate more than 2 closed, or do you mean like a harem?
>>25339302
Blare, Blue Bonnet, and Salai (whenever they work it out finally.)
I don't think there are any other legitimate poly couples. Maybe just a bunch of swingers.
>>25339366
Glad I'm not the only one who ships it
>>25339366
>>25339729
>Royalty
>Cunt dragon from fuck nowhere
>Royalty from a belligerent nation
How
>>25340011
Because muh fetish forced shipping
>>25340011
Because threadcannon, a convoluted plot for redemption, and cute.
>>25339354
Legitimate more than two, mostly. Maybe Kaos and Mau might have an open relationship or have someone else join them. With Kimmy, youre pretty much dating two different people already.
>>25340011
>>25340109
>>25340124
>Blare goes to Canterlot about a week after the Simmer Breakup
>Still nursing wounds
>Rains
>Blue Bonnet happens to be passing by and offers umbrella before sprinting home
>Blare locates and thanks Blue Bonnet personally
>Friendship molded
>Blue Bonnet introduces her friend Salai to the equation
>Salai gives Blare the shoulder she needs to cry on
>Interest sparked in all directions
Or at least, that was the plot I was going off of whenI wrote it
>>25340161
I don't really see Blare as Canterlot material if she wanted to get away. Too high class and aristocratic for her tastes. If anything I see her going someplace far off north like Vanhoover or another place like it.
>>25340161
But why is Salai there?
>>25340161
>>25340790
I always figured it was the other way. Blare met Salai first while trying to rage. Salai put her down for the count, made her a "vassal" (or some shit). Salai, with her slowly calming vassal in tow, go to Canterlot to meet her sister. There, Blare meets BB, a mutual friend to Sombra's reformed and sweet daughters. Cue relationship building and fluff, boom. Vassal eventually becomes girlfriend.
>>25335202
Great story, I liked it. I remember you, one of your stories had Mumble and Timber meeting Holly when they were getting some barbeque.
>>25340836
>>25340161
>Name your most convoluted story ideas you've made or remember in the thread
>>25331673
I really want to see more of Melody and Presto together.
>>25341281
Name what you want to see, and I'll try my best to write it
>>25341444
Presto taking Melody to the Grand Galloping Gala for the first time.
>>25330566
that abomination is actually kind of cute
so are thosedubs
>>25333191
I would like to think they are of and Iron Will was just raised among Equines or is simply extremely fluent in there language
>>25340916
It's part of >>25340836
, but it is waaaay before the Blare stuff. It all starts... ONE THOUSAND YEARS AGO! (Bwaaam). Mkay, we all know Salai is more "sombra's kid" than Annie, and I have an idea as to why. She was born during Sombra's rule when one of the first (if not the first) Earth on Equestria action happened. Got a woman from 1010AD who assumed he was a god and eventually sired him an abomination heir. He raises Salai to be just like daddy... Then he gets fucked, Salai goes to sleep in a crystal or something, and 1000~ years of nothing. Sombra is all shadow whatever, find another human, and decides he's going to knock her up and make her his fuck slave too. Nuh uh, she knocks the non-existent shit out of him, but carries her mist rape baby to term because religion. Raising her baby, Salai eventually wakes up with Anime Stereotype #11 (amnesia, for those of you not in the know). Annie's momma raises the two girls as sisters, which they are, but not like she knows. Salai is happy, being raised normally... Then Sombra has ruin shit by coming back. Salai goes bat shit, tries to destroy the Crystal Empire, and gets her ass handed to her. After getting thrown in Tartarus, Annie slowly reforms her again, this time with out #11. It eventually takes and it's decided she should stay in Canterlot if she is going to be released. BB, who is Annie's age and has an up and coming future in politics, wants to meet Salai and help her adjust. The two start a budding friendship and Salai is released from Tartacraz. Salai keeps mostly to herself, going on walks out of the city, but near enough she doesn't get in trouble, and runs into a drake who is drunk on anger. The drake tries to start shit and Salai, now reformed legitsies, wants to calm her down. That doesn't go too well and, like most of this, follows anime stereotype #5 (if you beat up a villain, they become your friend). Salai keeps Blare on a short leash until she works through her many issues. Then part A)
>>25341281
>One day, while they were relaxing in the park, Presto saw a flock of their satyr friends flying around and showing off their flying tricks.
>Icarus, being top show off extraordinare, got himself tangled up in a tree after he took some hard turns trying to impress Amelia.
>Dynamo tried pulling him out, to no avail, while Maverick and Tonbo were too busy laughing to help.
>As Ace shook her head, Presto turned his attention back towards Melody, quietly reading a special edition 'Alice In Wonderland' composed of braile.
>"Say Mel," Presto started.
>"Hm?" She looked up, her muddied amber eyes not necessarily facing Presto himself, but just as attentive nevertheless.
>"I don't really see you flying as much as the rest of the pegasus kids. Any particular reason why?"
>Presto knew it was a pretty obvious answer, and judging by Melody's giggles, she thought so too.
>"I guess it'll be difficult for me to feel my way around the air," she says as she clutches the slender cane set beside her. "Not to mention it'll be a hazard for all the other pleasant ponies going about their day."
>"See, I know that, but still. You never just want to...I don't know float around when no one's watching? Not even a little?"
>"To be quite honest, I'm much more comfortable on the ground. Why the sudden interest, Presto? You never really ask these questions. Not unless something's bothering you."
>Presto knew the unease in his voice would be snuffed out sooner or later. Ironically, she has a habit of seeing through people.
>"Not to sound insensitive, Mel, but I just can't picture you being happy like this."
>Melody looked a tad miffed hearing his statement, quizically raising an eyebrow and crossing her arms in a huff.
>"What ever do you mean?"
>"I mean the fact that you're always grounded here with me rather than up in the sky flying like the others."
(1/2)
>>25341776
How's that for convoluted? I didn't think it would actually take all 2000 characters.
>>25341778
>"Heck, even Ding flies around with your mother quite often. Why, if it were me and I lost my hands and couldn't do magic anymore..." Presto shook his head. "That'd just be terrible, y'know?"
>"I see! So that's what you meant." She gave a relieved sigh and a small smile. "Oh, you don't have to worry about that. I'm not even bothered by that silly fact."
>Presto frowned. Much to his chargrin, he could never seem to read Melody as well as she could him, what with her genteel and warm expression of hers.
>"But why?"
>Melody put a finger to her lips and scrunched up her face in thought for but a moment, and quietly giggled.
>"Well. That's because-"
>She gently swayed her body to the side until her head rested upon Presto's shoulder.
>"-I feel like I can fly over the tallest mountains and touch the sun, with every moment I spend with you."
>Melody then tried to calm Presto down as he blushed all the way back home.
(2/2)
>>25341794
>That line
Oh god, the cheese, I'm drowning in it! It burns!Other than that, very cute short. Daw/10.
>>25341776
Holy guacamole, that sure is something
I don't want to make any promises, but I picked up a bottle of wine and I plan on drinking it all tonight, so I may have drunken sketch time later.
>>25341998
Just let us know if it is a do or don't, please. Happy to see you this week, DJ. Enjoy your wine.
What sort of occupation do you think Cinder would have if she incorpoeates into Equestrian society? A thrilling one like being a member of the Royal Guard? An craftsperson or an artisan, like a blacksmith or a jewelry maker? Maybe a more mundane one like a salesperson or a courier?
>>25342192
Jewel supplier for the Canterlor boutiquers? (She and Precious get along well. Precious thinks she would look good in a green polka dot shirt with a blue base.)
>>25342304
Precious needs to get her eyes checked, that doesn't look appealing the way I'm imagining it. But jewel supplier seems cool. Like being dressed in all dusty and practical clothing, carrying around a big shovel or pick axe. If we're speaking about professions, what about other satyrs? Do they take after their parents and follow them? What job would Melody have if she can't be amailmare?
>>25341776
I couldn't be assed to read through a block of text like that.
So I'm going to offer my thoughts on this.
>1000+ Years ago
A group called the Shadow Ponies (Umbrun) attacked the Crystal Empire. They were driven out and imprisoned underground.
>~1000 years ago
Sombra attempted to free the Umbrun. Failed miserably.
>~20 years ago
Sombra returned. Tried to gain control of the Crystal Empire again. Failed and got blown to pieces. His "remains," went into deep hiding to regain strength.
Shortly thereafter humans appeared, and after people learned humans and ponies were compatable, the nobility of the Umbrun decided to make their own cross breeds. Using part of Sombra's essence, and blood gathered from humansfrom bats, they started to create offspring using some seriously fucked up magic.
The first was Salai. Like her father in every way. Wants to gain control of the Crystal Empire, and from there spread her influence.
Obsidiana is the middle child. Being raised with a silver spoon in her mouth, she only really cares about herself and her circle. So long as they're taken care of, the rest of the Umbrun could starve.
Then there's Nightfall, the youngest. He believes that the future of the Umbrun lies with making amends with the surface, not fighting them. As time has shown that being on the opposite side of them only brings them ruin. He sees himself as the "savior," of his people, and is willin to do anything to see himself on the throne.After a minor civil war, Nightfall ends up making peace with the surface. He sets the Umbrun free, and he even says in order to strengthen the bonds between Equestria and the Umbrun he should marry one of the Royal Daughters. And after not being impressed with Dawn or Selena, he goes for Blue Bonnet
>>25342353
I always had her pegged as being some sort of teacher for really small kids, often reading to them.
>>25342369
OH. THIS. YES.
>>25342353
I was thinking something like pic
>>25342369
>Melody
>Reading
She's blind, nigga
>>25342364
Nice headcanon. Sorta weird Annie's not in it, but nice.
>>25342369
>>25342398
And her husband Presto can visit the Kidergardeners and act all hammy like Trixie as he gives them a magic show.
>>25342423
That looks more suited for Blare than Cinder.
>>25342452
>Annie
Who
>>25342476
Sombra's more popular daughter... Well, until recently.
>>25342476
Daughter of sombra, wears a red dress and had a red streak in black hair I think.
Hey Anons what you think about herding? Specifially reverse gender role herding where Anon is force to be the stay at home dad with saaaay six kids?
>>25342476
Sombra's younger satyr daughter that has just as many pics and stories as Salai?
>>25342508
Eh. I could take it or leave it if it's done reasonably. Two or three partners is my limit though. Higher than that is just autism wank fest. And none of that "alpha" wife hierachy stuff, they either have to love each other like they were partners or learn to deal with sharing the person of their affections.
>>25342506
I only vaguely pay attention to Sombra's spawn. I just know names.
>>25342508
Thought that was Obsidiana.
>>25342552
Yeah, her.
>>25342681
This is the first time I've heard her referred by this name
>>25342724
Swear to God I thought I read that name somewhere. Oh well.
>>25342353
I think Muddle would have the chops as an action hero actor (since apparently no one likes the idea of him starting his own mafia).
Desirae would be in governmental management, obviously.
Cici would probably retire with a nice amount of cash before she gets punch drunk from her boxing matches.
Missy woukd work as a hair stylist in Volupia and Balenum's spa.
Mudpie...construction worker? Archeologist?
>>25342877
>Muddle as an actor
That, I'd wanna see.
>Desirae in politics
I CAN see that, but not necessarily agree.
>Cici as a boxer
Still think this a stupid idea, but onions.
>Missy in hair styling
Makes sense
>Mudpie as ???
I say editor for some girl mag or working 9-5 in some office.
>>25342931
>Muddle
Great then, something sticks.
>Cici
I based it off this pic and wrote a short story about it. I sorta see her as fit and athletic, I guess, and thought it was interesting.
>Desirae
What then? Her mom was the manager for the pony division of the Equestria games. Surely that's got to be part of some type of government.
>Mudpie
That could work
>>25342681
>Obsidiana
Well she does go by "Annie" so maybe that's her nickname and Obsidiana is her full name. I can get behind that.
>>25342877
The reason people didn't like it was because it's Honestly a stupid idea. At least actor has some glimmer or possiblity since i can see him play a unlikely hero type like Inyuasha.
>>25342993
Ack. Here's the pic
>>25343039
I guess it worked in theory, since he's part dragon and he'd naturally want to accumulate wealth.
>>25342993
Hmm, I can see Desirae more as a business owner. CEO or at least regional manager.
>>25343039
Oh, it is a stupid idea... If you take it seriously, but, as a fun idea, I'd laugh my ass off seeing it.
>Muddle with a face caked in blow, holding two tec-9s, screaming as the cops close in on him
>"GODZILLA AIN'T GOT SHIT ON ME!"
Much like the porn the thread produces, you need to have fun with it's stupidity, else it'll just piss you off.
>>25343080
That seems appropriate.These broken horse legs.
>>25343080
Just about as dumb as monster hunters
>>25342026My brother wants to play Battlefield 4, somaybe another time, sorry.
>>25343136
>busted face
>sausage fingers
>>25343456
It's cool. Have fun mang
>>25343507
Not the most flattering pic of her
>>25343205
I don't know, I think it's pretty cool, says the one who created the headcanon.But you're overlooking the fact that there was canonically a monster hunting division in Canterlot, but was disbanded because they let some escape.
Guys, Satyrs at a waterpark.
>>25343039
My only problem with Annie is that it's a human name, and unless they have actual contact with humans it makes no sense.
Same with Hans, and Maxi to a lesser extent.
>>25344693
Obsidiana sounds okay, but I'd prefer it if we keep calling her Annie as a nickname. Like how we call Orion 'Rory' and Rose 'Thorn'
>>25344693
To be fair, the Sirens WERE on Earth
>>25342508
>considering not staying at home poppa to take care of your six kids
Not trying to push too hard, but you are the formative parent. Your kids are only going to get so much exposure to their human side while being drowned in poninessBesides, Spitfire works.
>>25344760
But what ifwe just say the characters from EqG are "canon," while the events are not?
>>25344760
Only two or three of their names have a theme that somehow line in with their parents.'
>>25342437
Braile
>>25345564
Do ponies have braille?
>>25344804
That's silly. You could probably work your way around the events, but just completely disregarding them is just dumb. It's not like it's the comics or anything.
>>25345583
Nigger I don't even have Twilycorn or parts of S4/5 as part of my story canon. Secondary stuff like th movies/comic I pick and choose.
>>25345797
To each their own, I guess. I've added a bunch of stuff to my headcannon, so I can't really say anything.
>>25345900
It's crazy how often people forget "everything is variable" isn't just a slogan.
>>25342877
>Thistle: Diplomat/Spy or Chef
>Snap: Paramedic or Jewlery Maker
>Muddle: Actor
>Blare: Shmoozing off of Blue Bonnet or Musician
>Simmer: Monster Hunter or Bodyguard
>Broil: Monster Hunter or Shmoozing off of Glimmer
>Cinder: Gem Finder
So are those all the occupations for the drakes?
>>25346494
>Thistle
>Spy
>Muddle
>Actor
>Simmer
>Bodyguard
None of those make a lick of fucking sense.
>>25346544
I don't know, they're off of some headcanons I hear. Muddle has the rambuncious and loud personality for an actor, someone didn't like the monster hunting thing and instead had Simmer protecting Ivy as she traveled around to help people as a medicine woman, and someone had Spike grow up to be a spy in other countries. It's not like their parents have the magic ass tattoos that tell them what they're destined to do.
>>25346628
Muddle makes sense, kinda.
Simmer (and Boril) is hella dumb.
Thistle is just out of left field.
>>25346698
Says your picky ass.
Simmer is a bad character.
>>25346698
What do you think they should be then?
>>25346769
I don't disagree with that.
>>25346769Cici is a bad character
>>25346769
No such thing as a bad character, only bad executions.
>>25346774
I haven't really put any thought to it, but Simmer, from what people have said, doesn't have the guts to be a bodyguard. Or a monster hunter.
Thistle being a diplomat is okay. Spy is just too far out there for almost anyone.
I mean, why can't they just have normal lives? Not everyone goes out on adventures and shit.
>>25346814
Cici? Cici never gets any characterization besides her as a boxer. I doubt there's enough stories about her that I can fully count in my hand. You can't say someone's a bad character when barely anyone talks about her. That's like me saying Driftwood or Oliver is a bad character.
>>25346840
Because normal lives are boring and dragons aren't considered as normal in the MLP franchise much less drakes. You don't see dragons running coffee shops or filing for taxes in the show, the brief snippets we do see of them explain that almost everything about them is unknown. They're so seperated from normsl pony society, it's like asking why a person born in an exotic tribal family doesn't do things like how the rest of the world does.
Quick Satyr thread! Which three mares would you herd with and have adorable babbies with?Also odd idea, Twilight upon learning that Anon can have children with ponies passes a law where everymare in ponyville needs to give birth to a satyr to help prevent an endangered species from going extinct!
>>25346926
>Dragons filing for taxes
Fuck you, I have to write this now.
>>25347140
Top 3:
Spitfire, Fleetfoot, Sunset Shimmer
For variety:
Spitfire, Pinkie Pie , Sunset Shimmer
For the sake of completing the set:
Spitfire, Flitter, Cloudchaser
Mirror Pool Edition:
Spitfire, Spitfire, Spitfire
>>25347140
Vinyl, Octavia, and Leaf. If it's possible for humans to do magic, then Trixie. Just Trixie.
>>25347173
Gatorbait, c'mon. You know those mirror pool clones are damaged goods. Do you really want to put Spitfire down, twice?
>>25347195
>implying the writers didn't already damage her in Rainbow Falls
>>25346840
But Anon, there's a whole anime trope about being a socially awkward fighter. What they lack in self-confidence and social grace they make up for it in fighting prowess.
>>25347211
This is not a Wonderbolt thread, I will not take the bait.This is not a Wonderbolt thread, I will not take the bait.This is not a Wonderbolt thread, I will not take the bait.
>>25347195
Nothing says true love like a stormy night on a building roof, a gun in your hand, and two identical mares shouting at you that they're your true love and to shoot the other one. Well, unless it's three identical mares.
>>25347283
I didn't need to feel that
>>25347155
>Garble filing taxes
>Fizzle going grocery shopping
>Baff checking up on his retirement fund
>Spike trying to pay the bills
>Crackle going out to sell some prime real estate
>Fuckhuge Red the Dragon Mcgee reading a bedtime story
#JustDragonThings
>>25347173
You really have a huge boner for fiery dames huh?
>>25347180
Who the hell is Leaf?
>>25347572
Roseluck I mean. I got the name mixed up with her daughter's.
>Top Tier Satyr Babies
Presto x Melody
Radiance x Mistake
Ace x Anybody
Darcy x Anybody
>>25348106
So, what you're saying is that Darcy x Ace daughterus would be beyond the horizon.
>>25348150
I think that's the implication.
>>25348150
Yes. She would be the valkyrie that would herald in the satyr's golden age. Warrior blooded, lion hearted, and indomitably willed, she'd be the prime amazon. I'd be tempted to call her Golden Delicious, but this is all hypothetical talk.
>>25348150
>Darcy x Ace
>The new hotness
>More lesbians, but would a majority mind?
>>25348174
>>25348203
It was supposed to be banter, but whatever. I loosely ship it.
>>25348193
>Fiery haired
>Solidly built
>Hears the whispers of the farm, forest, and skySo, their daughter is Atalanta
>>25348203
We've only got three lesbian pairings. Tonsils x Steel, Cider x Sapphire, and Blare x Bonnet
>>25348236
The living embodiment of a perfect pastoral
>>25348236
What are ships that you don't really take seriously or agree with?
>>25348260
Anything with drakes involved as they don't exist
>:^)
>>25348250
A good girl. A strong girl.
>>25348260
I don't take most ships seriously because it's not something I'm invested in. I throw out ideas for the kids from time to time, but I've never thought to make any of them head-canon official.
>Radiance/Ace
>Timber/Ace
>Darcy/Ace
>Ace/her brothers
Those are the ones I kick around when I'm in the mood for a chuckle or a flash in the feels
>>25348294
Which one's a chuckle, which is a feel, and which is a fap?
>>25348290
No shuddup hiw can you say that drakes totes exist 1v1 me noob Fox only no items Final Destination
>>25348322
They're all played for laughs, most of the time. The first one is the only one that really gets feels because it's such a stretch it usually ends in girlish pining for a guy who can't know that she exists.I don't derive any sexual pleasure from any of them, but that's because she's my daughteru and that's inappropriate. The last two are the ones I've kicked around writing lewd for the most though.
>>25348363
Gatorbait, you're so pure, don't ever leave the thread too soon.
>>25330566
what non-satyr orparentalcrushes might your favorite satyr(s) have?
>>25348388
Cider had that whole thing with Rainbow Dash in some art Fuschs did. Someone also did a small Pogo x Rainbow story that never got completed. Sterks did a piece with Thorn x Big Mac. There's a bunch of stories with Hope and Gumdrop banging their respective dads.
>>25348407
>Hope and Gumdrop banging their respective dads.
They're electras forever, dadfuckers together! Sisters but so much more!
>>25348495
please no song numbers girls
>>25348910
Shush, let the lil' lass have her fun, right?
>>25330566
I want to fuck that.
>>25348935
Aren't they already having their fun?
>>25348371
>pureIf only.
>>25348388
Damn it, that Darcy's one year younger than the legal age of consent in my country.
S'not fair.
So, some people dislike drakes, and some people dislike Minotaurs. What about humans?
>Daughteru comes home with a HUMAN boy
>She is really giggly and clingy
>Boy is overly familiar with you
>"Humans gotta stick together, you know?"
>Evidence isn't concrete like a photo, but you KNOW he's fucked her
>How react?TL;DR: A next generation horsefucker is interested in your daughter
>>25351652
Eh, if his only fault is his lack of formality when speaking with his girlfriend's dad then I suppose it's not that big of a deal.He'd best not just be using her for her superior horse pussy, mind you.
"Listen here, noob. You may think you're hot shit just because you've fucked a horse pussy or two, but guess what, I'm not impressed. You ain't crap compared to me."
>"Dad-"
"When you've bumped uglies with as many weird species as I have then you can call me 'bro', but until then it's 'Mr. Anonymous' or 'sir' you got that?"
>"Daddy, stop!"
"Yuzu, please don't interrupt when I'm having a man to man talk with... sorry, what was your name again?"
>"Ambiguous, sir."
"Ambiguous? What sort of parent names their kid Ambiguous."
>>25351652
We need more sphinxes and pups so we can hate on them too. Pure equine master race. Fas the abominable abominations.
>>25351652
Daughteru's happy, so I'll begrudgingly go along with it provided he's not a complete twat. I'll also suggest we take a family camping trip so that I can see the measure of this upstart and teach him a little respect in the process.
Maybe, if he's lucky, I'll let him call me Poppa too.
>>25351652
What if it was a human girl interested in your son?
"Look, I don't want to seem creepy or anything, but you do realise my boy has a horse cock, right? I mean you do know that the head of that thing flares up to the size of your fist when he cums, yeah?"
>"Uh huh."
"Okay, good... and you're okay with that happening while it's uh... inside you?"
>"You don't have to worry about me, Mr. Anon. My friends and I experimented with fisting while I was in college. I can totally handle it."
"You... I like you."
>>25352097
I'd rather the boners be moderate and varied like a human's instead of keeping the relative size of a horse dong.
>>25352122
Your son is exceptionally hung, even for a satyr.Congrats, I bet he gets all the grills.
>>25352146My son us a drake, so not really.
>>25352161
I'm so sorry.
>>25352146
You waifu Fluttershy?
>>25352168
It's fine. We never asked for this, but hey. One step at a time, right?
>>25352170
No.
>>25352097
She later ends up in hospital with a torn rectum. The damage is critical and the only solution is a total ass transplant. She should have never agreed to let your son try anal.
>>25330566
I'd like to see more like OP's pic. Where the satyrs are on all fours
>>25352097
If a human grill was interested in any of my boys, I'd have to make sure that she understood that, yes, the tracksuit is his fashion statement. Or ask if she was sure which of the twins she was dating. Bonus points if she says "both".
>>25352252
Truly tragic. It's a good thing that they have a spare ponut on hand. Now everyone's happy.
>>25352299
Satyrs learn to walk at a very young age, and many don't have a crawling phase at all.The only time they're on all fours is during doggystyle.
>>25352308
>Tracksuit
Is your son's favorite past time squatting, drinking Vodka, or removing kebab?
>>25352337
If there were art of Hotshot squatting and sipping away on a bottle of cider, while muttering about how he has to remove drakes from the premises, I don't know what I'd do. Or any of those three in any combination, really.
http://m.imgur.com/a/Wda2i
Would you a Halley?
>>25352378
Let me consult the checklist.
>Does it have a horse pussy [x]
Answer is yes, I would.
>>25352308
>Bonus points if she says "both".
Polyandry pls go.
>>25352097
>>25351652
Here's a question. Would you let a fifteen year old you date your daughteru? Or son, on the off chance that there's a woman or two here.
If you're under fifteen then you should probably be doing your homework or something instead of browsing a cartoon horse forum.
>>25352378
u-unf
>>25352539
Well, yes, but that's because I love /ss/ and don't plan on having kids. If you're being serious, then probably no. Unless I spend substantial amount of time with them, to see if they're in it for the long haul and get a feel for their character and expect them to adhere to a strict amount of goals before he can even think about marrying her.
>>25352584
>get a feel for their character
But you already know their character. It's just a fifteen year old version of yourself.
>>25352625
Oh, I just read fifteen year old. Probably. If I knew I was sincere and seriouas enough to get my act together. Most of the things I said still apply.
>>25352539
Doses that mean she'd call him (me) daddy during sex?
>>25352710
It would be pretty strange if you were 15 and your daughteru was the same age as you or older. She'd have to have gone back in time, or you gone forward in time to fuck your future daughteru.
However, if that was the case, then the future you would know because he did it in his past, and would probably just tell you to go get that horse pussy.
>>25352710
Doses.
Eww, I fucked up.
Fire birb
Boomp
>>25352858
I wonder if we'll ever see more of her.
So, I may have been drinking, and a thought may have crossed my mind. How pissed would thread be if there was a story where Ace and Timber hook up? Not for sex, fully hook up. Rings around the fingers and happy marriage hook up. The thread already gets Triggered by Timber having a interaction with girls, but how far multiplied would it go with one of the best girls involved?
>>25331799
What if we want it with incest? Do you have any like that?
>>25354240
I wouldn't care. If it's well written then I'll read it, if not then I won't.
>>25354069
Probably not.
>>25354240
Write it and see what happens.
>>25354240
Isn't that kind of what Gator was building towards? Or was he going to make it another tragic thing like >>25348363 ?
>>25352329
That'd be nice though. Unf as hell
>>25352329
It comes naturally to some more than others.
>>25354240
I really doubt you're going to write it.
>>25354069
Write about her, anon. You can make something of her.
>>25354240
I'd be fine with it as long as it's good.I've been thinking about doing this with an incest couple too.
>>25354797
>I've been thinking about doing this with an incest couple too.
Do it!Simmer and Broil?
>>25355015
No.Yes.
>>25354797
Which couple?
>>25352505
No.
>>25354329
Maybe.
>>25355067
An incest couple. I don't really do the Anon x Daughter ships since everyone does it better than me, but I'm looking at maybe doing Darcy x Utah, Amelia x Maverick, and Icarus x Prism.
>>25355159
>everyone does it better than me
Bullshit, because nobody does it.
>>25355164
Mmm. Maybe I'll do it then. I don't write stories focusing on Dad Anon, so I guess I'd have to read up on them.
>>25355015
>>25355056
Reminder that drakes are ruining our precious Equestria by stealing our pure satyr daughterus and should be deported back to their trash heap island. #AroundDrakesStayAwake
>>25355243
Well, despite how often it's talked about, there are very few actual daddy daughter stories more than 1 or 2 posts long.
What route were you thinking of going? Raunchy or romantic, secret relationship or publicly known? Infidelity, widower or herd?
>>25355509
Single romantic secret relationship with a bit of raunch thrown in there. But I have to reiterate that my writing definitely needs some improvement, especially concerning dialogue, character interactions, and emotional moments. That's pretty much why I haven't finished any Simmer x Broil stuff recently, because I feel like I've stagnated.
>>25355561
Hmm. It might help to write your satyr as slightly more rambunctious or otherwise very happy girl, and your Anon as a fairly laid back guy then, so you can avoid needing to try writing exceedingly tense, serious moments as often.
This is doubly true if satyr is still, or is barely more than a child, as they're usually not very serious, and would allow you to shift more serious moments more believably between protective father and lover as needed.
If you're not already aware, the big electra satyrs are Hope, Gumdrop and Yuzu, and to a lesser extent, Kimmy/Mera and Dawn. Mistake used to be a popular one too, but she hasn't been cast that way in a while.
>>25354754
I was gonna do a small snippet of it in a larger story, but this challenged me. I feel challenged. I'm gonna go down some more cans, then start writing the shit out of this. Challenged.
>>25354274
>>25354289
>>25354797
Mkay, I will. Hopefully it's well done.I normally don't like incest shipping as more than just porn, but I'm curious. What would be your set up? 1 human, multiple, long term, one time thing, etc.
>>25354329
Really? I thought Gator shipped Ace with Icarus.
