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Heart of War: Thread 5- Out of the Rabbit Hole, Into the Fire
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Old Thread:
>>27139445

Original prompt:
>"Captain Anon. Would you like to accompany me to the war room?"

Pastebins:
Prologue: http://pastebin.com/cdi26t7W
Act I: http://pastebin.com/f0SDaDcx
Act II: http://pastebin.com/nwmz5VLj
Act III: http://pastebin.com/Pt6gamRU
Act IV (current): http://pastebin.com/v0PM4m8b

currently at 92,000 words
>>
Only two posts into act IV, so reposting those two
>>27408742
>Everything is just… blank.
>How are you even standing on a flat surface?
>Your headache spikes.
“Gah, where am I?”
>And everything starts flooding back to you.
>Your real life, and all of the dreams you’ve been going through.
“Am… am I dead?”
>”Not yet.”
>You turn on your heel to face the origin of the familiar voice.
“Discord. Where are we?”
>”Oh this is still your mind. After this it’s back into the land of the conscious… But, I promised you an explanation.”
“And you’ll be completely straight with me?”
>”Everything on the table: no lies, and no antics.”
“Well start from the beginning.”
>”Good a place as any. Well, I regret to inform you that I may have not been entirely honest with you when we previously spoke.”
>You open your mouth to ask for a clarification.
>”In the real world, yes. You see, the Princesses weren’t the only ones… infected.”
“What?”
>”Don’t worry too much, yours reacted differently to you own brain. It was starved and went dormant for years.”
“Then what woke it up?”
>”It found something it could feed off of. My guess would be fear, more specifically: despair. For the first time it was able to wake up and feed. From then it started planting… dreams to encourage the emptions it could feed off of.”
“Like the plane crash one.”
>”Correct. And eventually as you fought against the hopeless scenarios, I was able to intervene more and more.”
“You only gave some cryptic words of advice.”
>”The entire time I was doing everything in my power to weaken it.”
“So, why did one of the dreams reoccur?”
>”Well for the most part they were a bit more than dreams, they were also part hallucination and part vision.”
“Discord, don’t dodge the question.”
>>
>>27431161
>”Fine, because I helped you!”
“Why?”
>”Because helping you now is better than the alternative if you lost the mental struggle; and you would have lost without a safe haven to rest in.”
“There’s more to it that you aren’t telling me.”
>”I have no idea why you would insinuate that.”
“No lies.”
>”Well maybe I just feel ever so slightly responsible for the entire thing, so I gave you a proverbial port in the storm.”
“And why would you feel responsible?”
>”The Butterfly Effect: You’re in Equestria due to my… you know. And that sent ripples into the world that were just as chaotic as the best of my own conscious decisions.”
“Isn’t it all the same to you?”
>”I don’t need to lecture you on my morality, no it isn’t. Let’s just say there’s a difference between simple reality warping and bringing an extra-dimensional being into this world.”
“So you do have a conscious.”
>”This was a onetime deal, understand. No more help from here on out.”
“One last thing. Flurry and the others, I take it they go through something similar?”
>”Every waking and non-waking hour. But much worse, I was only able to give you the edge because your little friend was stunted due to starvation. They feed on emotion amplified by some of the strongest magic know to ponies, you’re inherent lack of it is what kept it from immediately growing in strength.”
“So how can I cure the others?”
>”It’s not that simple, there’s more than just the bu-“
>He gets a quizzical look on his face.
>”You’re waking up, not much time left. Retrace Twilight’s steps and you might find the answers you seek. You’re on your own now, and for what it’s worth: good luck.”
>Discord wishing someone good luck?
“Thank you?”
>…
>>
New updates start here:
>>27431171
>Your eyes open and you see the top of your tent.
>Every inch of your body aches.
>And you feel as if a horrible migraine completely ended in a moment.
>You reach over for your canteen.
>As you spin the cap off, you bring it to your mouth.
>It feels like a good portion of the lower right half of your face has crusted over from dried saliva or mucus.
>But still, the water was much needed.
>After chugging about half of it, you set it aside.
>And you just lay there on your bedroll.
>You can’t take anything at face value, but you’ve just awoken from something more than a dream.
>Because with normal dreams, they seem foggy even as they’re still fresh in your mind.
>But you can remember everything that happened with crystal clarity.
>It even felt more ‘real’ than your actual life, if that makes sense.
>You crack you neck, then start to get up.
>There’s just enough space in your tent for you to stand without brushing against the top.
>Light is streaming in through the tent’s relatively thin material.
>Inside, it’s just bright enough to see… something.
>>
>>27431178
>There’s a white speck in the middle of a clump of what looks like fine black threads.
>You get onto your knees to inspect the bedroll.
>It’s just to the right of where your head laid last night.
>Carefully you pick up the tiny white object.
>It’s a bug of some sort.
>A small round body with three legs on each side.
>On the head, or what you assume to be the head, you can see what looks to be a pair of beady black eyes, directly below it are a pair of pincers that are pretty sizeable for the insect.
>As you raise it, the black threads come with it.
>It looks like they’re coming out of the bug’s body.
>You touch one of the threads.
>And it starts falling.
>At your touch, all of the threads started coming out of the bug.
>You watch as they impact your bedroll and liquidize.
>There’s a small pool of shimmering black liquid, almost as it it’s moving but isn’t.
>And it’s not being absorbed.
>You don’t take your eyes off of it, but with your free hand you reach into your pack and fish out a pair of glass jars.
>Into the first, you drop the dead bug.
>Then you focus on the liquid.
>Reaching over to the end of the bedroll, you lift it.
>The liquid follows gravity and starts beading to lower ground.
>It’s almost like mercury when it touches skin.
>You open the other jar, and reach under the bedroll, working the liquid into the container.
>Then you seal it back up tight.
>You know of a couple of ponies back in Canterlot that should take a look at them.
>But you still have things to do before that.
>>
>>27431186
>It feels like so long has passed.
>Your memory perception should be sorted out as you properly wake up.
>You need some air.
>After putting on your boots and a fresh shirt, you head outside.
>The sun is incredibly bright before your eyes can slowly adjust.
>It looks like it’s around noon.
>Your men are sitting around a campfire, exchanging words with each other.
“Why didn’t anyone wake me up?”
>”Right about that…” One of the farther away men starts.
“Well?”
>Captain Thunder starts where the other stopped.
>”We thought you just needed the rest, I knew that days have been long in the Capitol recently, so I thought-“
>Code for: no one had the nerve to wake you.
“It’s fine, forget it.”
>Honestly, you couldn’t care at this point.
“Strike camp, we’ve got a few hours of lost time to make up for.
>Thus began your venture into the Everfree proper.
>As soon as you started the hike, one of your men congratulated you on the ‘real spooky story’ last night.
>You suppose that’s how it started.
>A normal nightmare that brought up feelings of despair that you would never have in the waking world.
>After that, the bug took you deeper into the rabbit hole.
>It pains you to admit it, but against all better judgment you’re going to trust Discord... for the time being.
>>
>>27431198
>As you walked through the Everfree, nothing dared try and attack your group.
>The creatures here all have learned to fear man.
>And they learned the hard way.
>But you faced quite the dilemma.
>Discord implied that to cure the others you’ll have to voyage to the east.
>That in itself causes three issues.
>First is the whole ‘most never return, those few who do have left their sanity behind’ reputation of the lands across the eastern seas.
>Second is that the Ministry of Interior Defense is still in hiding and could be planning anything right now.
>Third is Flurry.
>If she has it worse than what you went through…
>No.
>You’ll cross that bridge when you’re back in Canterlot.
>But when everything is boiled down, you’re needed both here and in the east.
>You can’t just send some ponies in your place.
>It has to be you.
>It always has to be you.
>Why does it always have to be you?
>If there’s one silver lining to this entire ordeal, it’s that you no longer have any doubts about your life.
>No more regrets, and no more second guessing.
>The truth is out there.
>And you’re going to find it.
>>
>>27431201
>…
>By keeping a soldiers pace, you managed to arrive at your safe house just before dusk.
>Most of your men went about setting up camp, but a couple unloaded the weapons and armor that you brought from it for the war.
>Meanwhile, you had somewhere to be.
>The night’s sky was almost completely clear, so the moon and stars kept things rather visible.
>A minute to the west was a small stream.
>Seems as good a place as any.
>You worked your way through the light brush towards the water.
>Finding a large enough rock to sit on, you took in the land.
>Anyone else would think it suicidal to sit next to a stream in the Everfree at night.
>But not you.
>Without all of the monsters trying to eat you, the forest is actually quite peaceful.
>It’s effectively your own personal wilderness area.
>You’ve been able to camp for recreation more than two or three times.
>But still, hostile fauna notwithstanding, John Muir would have loved it.
>The waterfalls, trees that are centuries old, views from the more mountainous regions.
>To say that they’re breathtaking wouldn’t do them true justice.
>Even something as simple as a stream.
>Crickets chirping, the sound of owls on the prowl, the views of distant fireflies illuminating among the brush.
>Moonlight reflecting off of the water, a refreshingly cool air, and the gentle sound of the stream flowing.
>You reach over and grab the bronze urn that you set beside you.
“You don’t deserve to be cooped up in there for eternity buddy.”
>You remove the lid.
”Jetzt ruhen, Frederick. Ich werde Sie vermisse.”
>Reaching over the water, you let Frederick’s ashes scatter into the stream.
“Du hast gute Arbeit geleistet… besser als die meisten.”
>As the last of the ashes fall from the urn, you put the lid back onto it.
>You sit at the stream while holding the urn for a few more minutes.
>Then you head back to the others.
>>
>>27431207
>Like usual they’re sitting around a campfire.
>But tonight you go past them and into your cabin.
>You set the urn on the desk you’ve got in the cabin, and then head to brush the dust off of your bed.
>Tomorrow and the day after, you’ll be retracing your steps back to the train tracks.
>If you keep pace, you’ll get there an hour before the train will be going past.
>After which, you’ll arrive in the Crystal Empire by nightfall.
>You’ve still got a pony in custody that might be able to lead you to other MID agents, assets, or safe houses.
>Assuming he actually knows anything, and is even the slightest bit cooperative, it’ll at the very least give you a starting point.
>It’s hard to believe that only yesterday morning you were in Canterlot.
>But as you tried to fall asleep, you remember the last thing that Flurry said to you the night before you left.
>”Okay, but- just be back soon.”
“As soon as I can kiddo.”
>You say to yourself.
“As soon as I can.”
>You told her that it’ll be fine.
>But you doubt that that’s possible anymore.
>…
>After you awoke at your normal time just before dawn, you prepared yourself for the hike back.
>This was supposed to be a simple trip to drop off some gear and scatter Frederick’s actions.
>But you weren’t prepared for this.
>As the rest of your men got up and packed their things, you set out as soon as possible.
>But today you weren’t very talkative.
>You didn’t expect to get a taste of what Flurry has been going through.
>And according to Discord, she has it worse.
>AND she has to go through it alone.
>She’s strong, but…
>>
>>27431214
>But it’s entirely possible that when you return, it won’t be Flurry.
>And you did this to her.
>She wanted you to take full power, but you wouldn’t.
>But you suppose that if you never made her take power, you wouldn’t be on this trip right now.
>And that mean’s you’d still have a hanger-on in your brain.
>But there’s no point in second-guessing.
>This is the hand that you chose to play.
>And you’re all in.
>With the nation and the only family you have on the line.
>…
>The following day, you had reached the outskirts of the Everfree.
>Without constant brush to work your way through, you made it to the rails quicker than expected.
>Nothing to do but wait.
>Soon, Captain Thunder took you aside to have words in private.
“What’s this about?”
>”Sir, you’ve barely said anything in the past couple days. You’re somewhat reserved to begin with, but it’s pretty drastic. Is something wrong?”
“Something’s always wrong.”
>”Can I speak frankly sit?”
“Go ahead.”
>”Honestly it’s freaking me out. I’ve been by your side for the entire war, and I’ve never seen you so… off.”
“Hold.”
>”Sir?”
“Listen.”
>In the distance a train’s whistle blows.
“Good thing we made such quick time, the train’s early.”
>You turn to head back to the tracks, but Thunder stops you.
>”Sir.”
“Meet me at the garrison tomorrow evening, if you’re that insistent, I’ll tell you then.”
>As you got back to the others, you could hear the train’s brakes grinding to a stop.
“Alright ponies, you can relax. You all know where to report once we’ve arrived.”
>With that, you boarded and found the conductor.
“Should be a suitcase here for me.”
>”Ah, right this way.”
>He leads you to a personal compartment.
>As you enter, you find a single suitcase on the bed.
>”We should be getting to our final destination around seven.”
“Thank you.”
>He slides shut the door as he leaves.
>>
>>27431220
>And you go over to open the suitcase.
>There was no sense lugging its contents through the forest.
>So you get changed.
>Fresh socks with more comfortable boots.
>Clean underwear.
>Beige fatigues that aren’t stained from dirt and the brush.
>Your jacket, styled after the Desert Fox’s.
>And your peaked officer’s hat.
>You spent a good portion of the remainder of the train ride staring into a mirror.
>The scar over your left eye.
>Your large beard, and how where it meets your hair you’re greying.
>The way the skin around your dark green eyes looks so tired.
>In just over three months you’ll be forty-six.
>The slight but constant ache in your knees.
>You’re getting old.
>To the untrained eye watching you fight in the past few months, you’re one of the greatest fighters this world has ever seen.
>But you know that you’re past your prime.
>And it’s only downhill from here.
>You’ve been noticeably slower and weaker compared to how you’ve preformed historically.
>You can only hope that you still have enough in you for the coming battles.
>And you can’t harbor any more secret hopes of ending in a blaze of glory.
>There’s too much on the line.
>You can’t stop until your little soldier is safe.
>Your little girl.
>’Little’
>She’s almost twenty-six.
>>
>>27431228
And that's it for tonight.
>>
Is the 5th thread where Flurry is finally filled with uncle Anon's seed after a good rutting?

I hope so.
>>
>>27431781
Didn't take long for you to show up
>>
Bump with love.
>>
>page 9
>>
>>27436306
>>
>page 9
>>
>post 4cc bump
>>
Back and working, updates coming soon
>>
>>27432311
Im always lurking, and hoping, for a good Flurry rutting
>>
>>27436306
>>
>>27431228
>You suppose that she’ll always be your little girl.
>And right now she’s in danger.
>Whatever has leeched its way into her head has made it personal.
>This can only end two ways.
>There’s nothing you can do about it now, but this is a war.
>You haven’t lost one yet.
>And this won’t be the exception.
>Eventually the train lurched to its final stop of the night.
>Soldiers would be by to deal with the rest of your things, so you headed off the train.
>The last time you were at this platform, you narrowly avoided a bomb.
>The sun had just set, and lights began to illuminate the city.
>And you set off into the streets.
>Some of the crystal ponies were heading into their homes for the evening; others were leaving to enjoy themselves in the Empire’s night life.
>Occasionally you would pass a military patrol that stopped to salute.
>But for the most part, ponies you passed were quick to get out of your path.
>It was obvious that you were deadest on a mission.
>Before anything else happens, there’s a pony you’d like to have some words with.
>…
>>
>>27440076
so glad I caught up on this
>>
>>27440076
“Leave.”
>The two patrolling guards quickly shuffled out of the room, shutting the door behind them.
“Hello, ‘Cadence.’”
>”Anonymous.”
>You approached the cell; Cadence was sitting in the center of it, almost as if she’s barely moved a muscle since being imprisoned.
>”You think that what happened in your mind was a victory, but it is merely a… delay.”
>Hmm, some sort of shared consciousness.
>That changes things.
“You’re in the Princesses heads, and you’ve been in mine. You know my reputation.”
>”Of course.”
“You have one chance, and that’s one more than most of my enemies get. Leave now, and go back to wherever you’re from. If you don’t then I give my word that I will personally hunt down and destroy each and every one of you.”
>”Ha ha ha ha ha, such anger… You know that she isn’t really your family, after all: you can never have one.”
“Family don’t end at blood.”
>”A meaningless sentiment to help you sleep at night… does it actually work?”
“Cadence, if you can hear this: I’m sorry.”
>You swipe your hand in front of the sensor crystal on the concrete bar holding the bars in place.
>And in response, the front of the cell opens to your left.
>You take a step inside of the cell, and Cadence stands up.
>Even if the door is open, as long as she stays within the confides of the cell, she won’t be able to teleport.
>>
>>27440506
Much appreciated.I was spotty for a bit, but now that my schedules clear for the immediate future, I'm trying to get at least a thousand words or two out a day.
>>27440519
>Before she can do anything else, you grab her by her neck and slam her onto her back.
“I know all of you can hear me right now, so listen up:”
“Get.”
“Out.”
“Of.”
“My!”
“DAUGHTER!”
>She tries to squeak out some words through your grasp.
>”Even… If we are all trapped… Eventually the others will come… All of them.”
“I don’t care if I have to march through each and every circle of Hell itself, I will find you and I will end you.”
>”Hubris will be your downfall. You are a mere mortal fighting against that which has survived eons.”
“Everything has it’s time, and everything dies. You’re no different, and I’ll see to it personally.”
>”We shall see.”
>You push away from her and exit the cell, swiping to close the door.
>Cadence quickly gets on her feet, but crashes against the barrier as the cell closes once more.
“You’ve signed your death warrant. When I find the rest of you, and I will, just remember that you could have ended this here.”
>You turn to head out of the room, and hear one last “Fool!” as you leave.
>It seems that Equestria was overdue for having some magical creature trying to destroy it.
>But you won’t do any of that capture/reform nonsense.
>This only ends two ways.
>With you or them dead.
>And you don’t make a habit out of dying.
>>
>>27440535
>You need some air.
>As you exited the spire’s dungeons, you ended up passing through one of the guard barracks.
>You entered into the hazy room where a half dozen off duty ponies were sitting around a circular table.
>Smoking cigars and playing poker.
>They scramble to stand at attention.
>One of them speaks up.
>”Uhh… Sir, we weren’t ACTUALLY gambling.”
>Right, that’s still technically illegal for active military members.
“Look. I do not, nor have I ever, cared about that regulation… But give me one of those cigars and a match, and we’ll call it even.”
>”… okay.”
>The pony next to him elbows him.
>”I mean okay, Sir!”
>…
>You stood on one of the many balconies that overlook the Crystal Empire.
>Striking the match, you light the cigar.
>You cough up the first puff of smoke.
>The last time that you smoked must have been in college, but right now you suppose it’s better than drowning yourself in a bottle.
>As you lean forwards onto the bannister, you just take in the city.
>Conspiracy here and overseas you’ve got… it.
>You don’t even know who you can trust anymore.
>As you stood there in quiet contemplation, you realized something as you neared the end of the cigar.
>If you keep on like this, you’ll just give yourself a heart attack.
>One day and one problem at a time.
>You take a final drag before tossing the cigar’s remains off the balcony.
>As you squint towards a distant clock tower, you see that it’s only 8:30.
>So you start making your way down the spire’s many stairs.
>>
>page 9
>>
>>27440546
>that mental image of anon smoking a cigar while overlooking the night lit crystal empire below
Straight based, keep up the gud work!
>>
Small post cause character limit is still a bitch
>>27441102
Just wait till you see some of the stuff I've got planned for later in the story. The second half of Act IV and most of Act V should be one hell of a roller coaster.
>>27440546
>…
*knock knock knock*
>You see the curtains on the door’s window move before the door is thrust open.
>And a light hazel mare latches her front legs around you.
>It’s almost hard enough to knock the wind out of you.
>”You actually came back! I mean it’s good to see you again.”
>She composes herself and lets go of you.
>”And you brought a bottle in a brown bag.”
>You slide the wine out of the paper bag.
>”So how have you been, how was the war, and… everything?”
“It’s been… eventful.”
>She just stands there looking at you with a huge grin on her face.
>”Oh! Please, come in, I’ll go get some glasses.”
>After wiping your feet on her welcoming mat, you enter into the house, closing and dead bolting the door behind you.
>You go towards the living room, and set your hat onto the coffee table in front of her couch before sitting down.
>Amber soon enters, holding a pair of wine glasses and a cork screw.
>>
>>27441150
>”You know, just a couple days ago I had the strangest dream about you.”
>What.
“What?”
>”Yeah, and good thing that school is out and I didn’t have to go to work, cause I didn’t wake up till like noon.”
>What.
“What?”
>”Strangest thing, I can remember it perfectly. I was… well I was like you, and we went on this vacation in this carriage thing that wasn’t pulled by ponies. We went to this lodge in some forested mountains.”
>What?
“What?”
>”It was a really great time, and unlike most dreams, I can remember it perfectly. Then you went up some stairs and-“
“And it ended?”
>”Then this letter popped into my hands. It said: ‘hope you enjoyed the company’ and it was signed with the letter D. After that it ended.”
>Discord…
>”And we had a dog that was just adorable.”
“He was a hunting dog; he was not ‘adorable’ in any way.”
>”How did you know that?”
“And there were four days in the dream. The first was on the road and we spent the night at a cheap motel. The second day of driving we got there. The third and fourth were entirely at the lodge. Every night we would… you know. I think we shared the dream.”
>”That’s impossible.”
“That’s what you said in the bath, but you were proven wrong.”
>”Okay, seriously. I didn’t tell anypony about it.”
“Is this the real life?”
>”Is this just fantasy…”
“Believe me now?”
>”Is that really what your world was like?”
“For the most part.”
>”I just… wow.”
>You reach onto the table to grab the cork screw.
“I know.”
>You set down the cork, and grab the glasses, filling up each of them.
>>
More coming tomorrow.
Also, the lack of Flurry PoV is a conscious decision given how things are developing.
>>27441158
>”How did we share a dream?”
“Long story.”
>You hand her one of the glasses.
>”Tell me about it.”
“Well, basically I was… sick. You know about Discord, right?”
>”My students love when he come up in history lessons.”
“Well I guess he owed me a favor, so he put me into a dreamlike state to heal… and I guess he gave me some company.”
>He did call the reoccurring lodge dream a safe haven.
>”But you’re okay now, right?”
“Yeah.”
>”That’s all that matters.”
“Cheers.”
>You clink the glasses together.
>After a long gulp, you stop to speak.
“Look, Amber. I’m only going to be up here for a couple days, and I’m here on business. I can’t say much, but after that I might be gone for a long while. I can stay the night, but beyond that…”
>”You’re here now, and that’s what matters. I know it’s never come up, but today’s my Birthday.”
“I would have got you something if I’d have known.”
>”Well you did bring wine, but really that’s got to be THE most used ‘forgot till today that it’s your birthday’ gift in the book.”
“Yeah, yeah, laugh it up. But really, Happy Birthday.”
>”You’re here and that’s the best gift I can imagine.”
“You know, I’m not going to lie, you were absolutely stunning as a human.”
>”Oh, as a human?”
>You give an exaggerated sigh.
“I can never win, can I?”
>”Of course you can’t, I’m the mare in this relationship.”
“I guess some things are the same in every world.”
>”Now grab that bottle and meet me in the bedroom, you’ve only got a few more hours to give me my real Birthday gift.”
>She leans in to whisper in your ear.
>”That’s an order soldier.”
“Yes Ma’am.”
>…
>>
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>>27441174
I get that this is really only my problem, but we need a drawfag to give us a good image of what this anon looks like, because he's older and has got facial hair and all that shit, and even though it's a suspenseful sort of story, ALL I CAN PICTURE IS THIS FUCKER!
>>
>>27441478
So.. Anon = Fernando...
Does that mean Amber = Randi? Suddenly not interested...
>>
page 10
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>>27441478
>give us a good image of what this anon looks like
I'd rather keep picturing him as I have been in my autistic head. That's the beauty of AiE, Anon can be and look like however the fuck you want him to

>mfw I've been picturing him as a bearded Daniel Craig due to the whole aging past his prime theme
I know, I know...I'm a faggot
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(spoiler pic is me in ten minutes Fallout 4 character gen making a rough estimation, but don't let it change any personal preferences, It's just an estimation of what's personal in my head.)
See:
>>27443252
(And that's actually pretty fair to what I've been picturing.)

>>27441478
First and foremost Anon is the generic self insert, I just prefer not to use the green body suit stereotype. Generally appearance doesn't play a huge role, so imagine what you will. Large beard that's generally well kept, greying hair around the temples, scar over the left eye, and an assortment of old war wounds around the rest of the body. Anything else is fair play for the individual reader.

That being said, personally I've been assuming he's mostly germanic with a bit of celt and slav mixed in. I just woke up and spent a few minutes putting pic related together, (excuse my console pleb) but it's only rough 'sketch'. It's a bit wonky (Eyes, nose, cheekbones, hair style) due to the character gen itself (and my patience with it), and It would probably take an hour just to get things marginally closer to how I envisioned it. Also the hair is of course going grey in about everything surrounding the front half of the ears, and the beard is a bit longer and slightly better kept. And the scar isn't as long and has faded a bit more. The area around the eyes would be slightly more wrinkled. but not to senior citizen-tier like the next highest option was. (To the left I started dream Amber, but got lazy after hair and eye color and a couple tweaks.)

Like I said, that's not exactly what I have in mind, it's just a ten minute rough draft to better answer the question of appearance seeing as it came up a couple threads ago as well. Hopefully it helps to clarify things.
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>>27443276
(And sorry about the gore that is the writing in that, I didn't sleep well and haven't had any coffee yet)
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>>27443706
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>>27444120
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>page 9
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>>27445221
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>>27446172
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>page 9
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>>27446172
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>page 9
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>>27449367
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>>27443276
Anon is Man.
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>>27450128
A shame I didn't work in a lumberjack dream simply for the testosterone and the cross-dressing

More as soon as I finish the scene I'm workign on
>>27441174
>As always, you awoke early the next morning.
>You should be getting straight to business, so you carefully worked your way out from Amber’s grasp.
>She was still wearing the officer’s cap that you left here previously.
>After you had dressed, the sun was just starting to peak in through the blinds.
>”Mmm, up so soon?” A groggy voice calls out as you were about to exit the room.
“I always wake up before dawn.”
>”Is that a-“
>She yawns.
>”pun about my name?”
>Amber Dawn.
“Well now that you bring it up…”
>She sighs.
>”Well, I know that you’re busy… Just stay safe, okay?”
“I’ll try.”
>You turn to take your leave.
>”Anon.”
>You pause and turn your head back towards her.
>”I love you.”
“I know.”
>…
>You stepped out into the cool morning air.
>Part of you misses the dream.
>It reminded you of what was taken from you.
>Your family.
>Your home.
>Your girlfriend.
>Readily available access to meat.
>The internet.
>Cars.
>Mainly, you missed people in general.
>Other humans.
>You know that for all intents and purposes, she’s the same individual as she was in the dream.
>And it’s probably petty to think of it like that, but her as a pony is just… different.
>Which in itself is another issue seeing as she’s always been like that.
>It’s just in a dream that she wasn’t.
>Before a few days ago you had long since settled the issue of not being able to go home.
>You suppose that it’s still settled.
>This is nonsense, right now you have a job to do.
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I was listening to some AC/DC while writing tonight. Youtube recommended a documentary about the Roman conquest of Britain... it knows me so well.
>>27450172
>…
>Back in the dungeons.
>Another magic proofed cell.
>Home to one ex-Lieutenant Light Eclipse.
“Take a break.”
>The patrolling guards take their leave.
>But as you spoke, the prisoner looked upwards at the sound of your voice.
>His pale red coat was covered in dirt, his blackish mane was overgrown and coated in grease from the isolation, and you could smell him from here.
>At least they cleaned the bucket out today.
“You should know that the war is over. Celestia and Luna are imprisoned, and Flurry sits on the throne.”
>”You’ve kept busy since the hospital.”
“I’d like to say the same about you, but the reports show that you’ve not said a single word to any interrogator that dropped by.”
>”They made boring conversation.”
“That’s a lot of loyalty for a hired gun.”
>”Is it?”
“At least you can talk now. Who hired you?”
>”Starswirl the Bearded’s ghost.”
>You start to slowly pace around the cell.
“I’ve been going over your file recently. Born and raised in West Fillydelphia. Before signing up you were pretty well off, but at the onset of the Second War of the Saddle Arabian Coast, you stepped forward to do your patriotic duty.”
>”Your point?”
“After the conflict’s conclusion, you went home. When you returned, you went back to being rather well off and with a hefty sum from war bonds. Fast forward until the recent conflict, and you show up to sign back on in the Crystal Empire of all places.”
>You stop pacing to lean in and look through the horizontal bars.
“You dropped everything and just left behind a two year old daughter, and a pregnant wife. She recently gave birth to a son, by the way.”
>”She did?”
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>>27450257
>His face immediately perks up at hearing that.
“To the best of my knowledge. Now the way I see it, a well off family man with a spotless record wouldn’t be easily swayed by a sack of bits sent your way.”
>”That’s… pretty naïve for you to think.”
“What was it? Clandestine stallion in a suit visit the day care? A knife stuck into the crib you were getting ready?”
>”I’ve got nothing to say to you.”
“Remember what happened at the hospital?”
>”You… you killed them all.”
“All twenty-seven of them, by myself.”
>”How do you even remember that number?”
“I’ve got a good memory. It’s just us talking here, nopony is listening.”
>”You can’t get to them before they do.”
“Let’s say I can. It happens that I’ve run into more than a few estates. New names, new lives: living as a rich family on the banks of that lake outside Las Pegasus. Just another slightly well off family buying state-seized property after the war. All I need is information: names, aliases, locations.”
>”You don’t understand, they’re ALWAYS following you. And they know I’m a prisoner, if you get within a square mile as my family, they’re dead.”
“And what if I can have them safe and here by tomorrow night?”
>”… Even if that was possible, they’d still find us.”
“I’m bringing them down. All of them. You know my record, and you’ve seen my work first hand… well first hoof. What makes you think they’ll be able to?”
>”I…”
>He starts staring at off to the side.
>”Get me my family, then we’ll talk.”
>You set out of the room and leave the dungeons.
>But he’s right.
>You know that you’ve been being watched for months, maybe longer.
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>>27441910
>>27441478
If this was the case, then Flurry would have been rutted already, as a true manwhore is not bound by superfluous family connections.

Channel the manwhore writefag, and have Anon rut Flurry!
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>>27450478
He litterally called her his daughter a few posts ago
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>>27450513
I don't see a problem with it. Not blood relations and pseudo-incest is hot
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More tomorrow Anon is obviously the Protagonist, Flurry is the Deuteragonist, now the Tritagonist gets a PoV
>>27450262
>…
>You had just written and sealed a letter and handed it to a soldier.
“He should be in the encampment by now. Take it directly to Captain Thunder, not anypony in his command, the Captain himself.”
>”Sir!”
>As he flies off, you start climbing the stairs.
>And it’ll be a long climb.
>In retrospect for your knees, you should have picked a different meeting location.
>But you need to make sure it’s actually a one on one conversation.
>Really though, the spire needs an elevator.
>…
>”Sir!”
>A pegasus flies over to your position.
>He stops to salute.
>”From the Field Marshal.”
>He holds out a sealed letter.
“Thank you private. As you were.”
>You start walking out of the training fields, letting the Lieutenants take over the training exercises.
>Heading into the nearest tent, you open the letter- the seal is fresh but unbroken.
>’Top of the Spire, post haste. Trust no one.’
>It’s signed by the Marshal.
>You crumple the letter, and as you leave the tent you crumple the letter, tossing it into the nearest fire.
>And you made sure it burnt before leaving.
>You’ve seen him in the Second Coast War, and have been by his side for the better part of a year.
>And you have never seen him so distanced from the world.
>You flew directly to the top of the Spire.
>It’s time for some answers.
>…
>As you landed on the peak of the great tower, you saw the Marshal’s back.
>He's overlooking the city with his hands behind his back.
>”Were you followed?”
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And alcohol saves the night again! The time bertween b
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>page 9
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>>27452105
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>>27452821
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>>27453519
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>>27452821
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>>27452105
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m
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>>27456595
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>>27457556
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before bed bump
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>>27450257
>west fillydelphia born and raised
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>>27458874
you are very late on that joke
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page 9
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>no nightly post
Why do you do this to us?
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>before wageslaving bump
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>>27460556
>Wageslaving safety meeting bump
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Living on the taxpayer dime neet bump!
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>>27459970
writers bloc hit me like a brick. I couldn't get an upcoming event to sit right in my mind. I think I've solved that issue, so I'll be writing again in a few hours or so.
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>>27441150
Yeeees! I'm so glad you've kept this story for so long. Already hyped for Act V and the rest of IV.
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>>27461800
I'd suggest Anon return to Flurry for a good rutting.
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>>27461800
Looking forward to it
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>>27450589
“I don’t think…”
>He turns to face you.
>“Alright, listen up because we’re only speaking about this once.”
>Grim.
>“What I’m about to tell you is only known by Discord, the Princesses, and myself.”
>Equally as grim.
>And what does Discord have to do with this?
>“What do you know about the East?”
“Isn’t it all just stories meant to frighten young flies and colts?”
>”Over twenty years ago, Shining Armor and his expedition went missing. All hands are assumed dead.”
>What does Cadence’s husband have to do with this?”
>”Five years later Princess Twilight, his sister, went missing trying to find him. But returned after three more years, after a few days she disappeared once again.”
>He reaches into one of his coat pockets and tosses a glass jar to you.
>There’s some sort of small white bug in it.
>”She brought back company: a handful of parasites that feed off of negative emotions when they’re amplified by Alicorn magic.”
“And?”
>”And they’ve completely taken over the minds of Cadence, Celestia, and Luna. Flurry is fighting, but we don’t know how to remove them without killing the host.”
“There’s more, isn’t there?”
>”Somewhere along the line one of them infected me. Only it didn’t take, probably due to my different brain chemistry. I spent that first night in the Everfree fighting for control of my mind in a dreamlike state. With a little… help from Discord, we killed it. That bug in the jar crawled out of my nose to die.”
“But why are you telling me?”
>”Because I need someone I can trust, and you’re the closest I’ve got.”
>The closest he’s got.
>The exact wording implies he doesn’t fully trust you.
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>>27463188
>”I was intending to leave you in the Empire as commander of the local garrison, but I’ve got a job for you if you’re interested.”
“What’s the job?”
>”You’ve said before that you’re a strong flier, how long would it take you to get to Fillydelphia.”
“I could be there by midnight.”
>”Then I need you to think carefully. You can stay here, and go about your days like this conversation never happened. But I won’t lie, if you are in, then it’ll be far more dangerous than the wars have been.”
“I…”
>You suppose that this is good a time as any to tell him.”
“Winter’s pregnant. She was on her cycle when we got married… and I’m gonna be a dad.”
>”I understand. You can fly down right now, there’ll be a promotion coming up and you’ll be able to stay here with them. I’ll find a way to make do on my own.”
“But, let’s say for a minute that I believe you. What would you need from me?”
>He pulls out a sealed folder from his coat.
>”I can’t do anything while the MID are still skulking about. I’m going to bring them down- all of them. If you take this folder, it’s the point of no return.”
“I…”
>You’d be involved in a personal war against the old Secret Police.
“So is it just you and me involved in this… crusade?”
>”Something like that. You know how influential they were, they’re in hiding but still there.”
>That is his way of saying that your wife can and probably will be in danger if you take the folder from him.
>Almost every soldier you’ve ever served with has said that they’d follow him to the gates of Tartarus if he asked.
>And he’s asking.
>Metaphorically, but the point’s still the same.
>This isn’t what you signed up for.
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More coming tonight
>>27463201
>But you reach out and grab the file.
>He nods over to a satchel a few feet from you.
>“You’ve got your sword on you, and there’s a canteen and some rations in there. You’ll need to leave immediately. Everything you need to know is in the file.”
>You’ve got a bad feeling about this.
>”Wait.”
>His head is cocked to the right, as if he’s listening intently.”
>He puts one finger to his lips, and motions in a circle to keep talking.
>”Before you go, how are things with the wife?”
“Well, great.”
>He starts slowly walking over to the south end of the spire.
>You can’t even hear his footsteps as he moves.
“She was really happy to see me, and when she told me the news I almost cried.”
>In each cardinal direction the top floor of the spire has a balcony with a ladder leading to the top.
>As a wind gust picks up, he gets onto his knees.
“I don’t care if it’s a filly or colt. I’m just… It’s hard to describe.”
>In a swift movement he goes prone and reaches down.
>You hear a grunt of pain as he raises up a pegasus by his mane.
>As the Marshal stands he tosses him onto the top of the spire.
>Before he can take flight, you see the Marshal reach out.
>Your own wings press against your body and you shudder as you hear the cracking of the bones in his left wing.
>The stranger cries out in pain.
>And the Field Marshal spins him around as he grips his neck.
>The next thing you see is your superior reaching into the pegasi’s mouth.
>He pulls out a tooth.
>”Not so quick on the cyanide.”
>He turns his face towards you.
>”Go, get back here as soon as possible.”
>You put the file into the satchel and toss it around your neck.
>Then prepare your wings for flight.
>”And remember, trust no one.”
“Sir.”
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Bumpu with love.
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>Everything is written for a reason
>Lieutenant Thunder's pregnant wife is brought up

No...
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>>27463835
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Content bump, coming back in a few hours
>>27463206
>…
“You know how to make it stop.”
>The pegasus looks up to you, his face bloody and bloated.
>”I… I won’t.”
>You give another swift hook into his cheek, and he spits out a few more bloody teeth.
“Names, now.”
>He sprawls out on the top of the spire, unable to stand because you’ve broken two of his legs at this point.
>He mutters unintelligible grunts of pain.
“Alright, be that way.”
>You brace your knee on his back, and grab his unbroken wing.
>”You’ll hang, trait-“ He then screams in pain as the bone cracks.
>They’ve trained him to resist torture, and they trained him well.
“I can do this all day.”
>”I won’t give you anything.”
“A shame, and here I thought you might survive this.”
>You stand back up and let him wallow in the pain for a moment.
>Then you grab him by his tail, and drag him over to the side of the spire.
>Hefting him over the side, he’s face to face with the distant ground, swaying slightly as you hold onto his tai
>”AH, AHHH!”
“You’ve got two ways off this tower; you’re looking at the express way. And I don’t think you’ll fly so good.”
>”Alright, alright. Just pull me up.”
>You drag the pony back onto solid ground.
>He’s trying to sit up.
>Trying.
>”Grandma Sapphire’s, that place in the north side of town. We’ve got a safe house underneath it.”
>Wait.
“You have a secret base under a donut shop?”
>”She’s on the payroll. Hiding in plain sight. For the love of Celestia, just don’t kill me.”
“Oh I won’t kill you.”
>”Oh thank-“
“Gravity will.”
>You kick him over the edge.
>Then lean over the edge and watch until he impacts the ground.
>You could hear the screams all the way down.
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>>27461800
>writers bloc
Is that in any way related to the Soviet Bloc?
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>>27465815
Savage af thqh familiy.
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9
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>>27465992
It's about as easy to get information out of.
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>>27458887
oh cool a flurry heart story?
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>>27465815
>As you went down the Spire’s stairs, you met a group of soldier as you were about hallway down.
>”Sir! What happened up there, we’ve got a dead pegasi on the ground.”
“Suicide. I tried to stop him but was too late.”
>”But there’s blood on your hooves- err hands.”
“I aggressively tried to stop him.”
>Technically that’s half true.
>He broke off a tooth to bite a cyanide capsule, but you stopped him.
“Back to your duties. He tried to kill me, I defended myself.”
>”Understood.”
>You continued down the stairs until you reached the public records room.
>There’s a copy of every construction and repair job that happened in the Empire for the past thousand years or so.
>If there is a base under Grandma Sapphire’s Donuts, there will be something to substantiate the claim.
>Assuming it was a recent addition, the actual records of the job and any schematics would have been hidden.
>But that doesn’t account for things like increased power draw or water flow, or any construction related noise or traffic complaints.
>Unless they were extremely thorough, there’s got to be something.
>As you started scanning through documents, something occurred to you.
>Just as all of this started, Flurry did something similar.
>Back in Appleoosa.
>She spent an entire day checking records to see if any of the townsponies writing matched the letter you found in the mercenary base.
>God that was so long ago.
>It was only at the start of spring, but it feels like an eternity has passed.
>There’s a noticeable change of how much grey is in your hair since then.
>Averting a war, plots against your life, discovering a conspiracy, fighting a different war, actual attempts on your life, toppling the government, more conspiracy.
>And that’s setting the whole parasite ordeal aside.
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More tomorrow
As I'm writing, I'm getting the feeling that there might be another extension of the story.
>>27467882
>…
>The sun will be down soon, so you might as well rest your wings and check out that file.
>You’ve spent the better part of the day flying and making sure nopony was following you.
>To the best of your knowledge, you haven’t been.
>You perch yourself on a cloud heading roughly in the direction you’re going, and took a swig from the canteen.
>With the remaining light, you started skimming the information the Marshal gave you.
>An address to a house in Western Fillydelphia.
>It belongs to the unicorn that was In charge of the attack on the hospital after the Marshal feigned being wounded from the attempted bombing.
>Ex-Lieutenant Eclipse is ready to make a deal.
>He says that the only reason he was involved is because the MID threatened his family.
>A likely story, but who are you to question the Marshal’s judgment.
>You’ve got to get the wife and foals safely back to the Crystal Empire ASAP.
>Which will be problematic.
>The wife, one True Love, is an earth pony
>That rules out flying.
>But where have heard that name before?
>True Love.
>Isn’t that?
>Yeah, she writes romance books.
>Winter loves them, has the full collection on her bookshelf.
>Winter.
>Your Gem.
>She hates when you call her that.
>But how are you going to keep her safe once the MID realizes what you’ve done.
>NO.
>You shouldn’t think like that.
>The Field Marshal’s got to have a plan, he always does.
>You go back to the file.
>Unknown amount of hostiles.
>Anypony could be one of them.
“Well that’s just dandy.”
>You say to yourself.
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>>27467305
Partially.
It started as a one shot response to the OP prompt, and things escalated. Multiple times. Anon as demoted general that was defacto parent figure to Flurry. Flurry is the secondary protagonist and got roughly half of the PoV until Act 3.

Prologue- exposition
Act I- warstory
Act 2- more warstory
Act 3- politics and a trip down the rabbit hole
Act 4- spy thriller
After that I've got something planned that should take up half to a full act
All of them having foreshadowing for the eventual climax act(s)
Then maybe an epilogue to tie up lose ends

At first it was a oneshot, with call for moar I planned to have the prologue with two acts and maybe an epilogue. That grew into three acts, and four, until we get to now and I'm guessing prologue, six or seven acts, and maybe an epilogue (Be it a single scene or as long as the prologue was)

>>27464753
Well what's the point of killing characters that the readers don't care about?
we GRRM now?
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>>27468093
You'll be GRRM when you fail to update for 5 to 6 years while saying it should come out soon.
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It is so hard to believe that this awesome story hasn't gotten any fanart yet. It's just so damn good. It really is.
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>>27469368
It's a shame really.
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>>27469368
Someone drew this in the original thread but that's about it.
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>>27470575
I'm pretty sure that pic went much farther than that.
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Pretty sure not by much
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>>27472599
She's presenting to her uncle Anon. Time to rut her.
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>>27472955
Please stop with this shit and leave.
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>page 9
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>>27473996
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>>27473996
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>>27468093
How long were you planning on making the part where anon goes to the east?
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>>27474814
In the 2 act idea it was an easy way to justify Shining Armor and Twilight's missing status, and Cadence's distance. It escalated and so did the foreshadowing. In the 3 act idea, I figured it would be either the last half act or epilogue, but then the war went on longer than i expected. In the 4 act I meant to wrap up domestic stuff in the third act and deal with east in the fourth, then the dream sequence happened. I had guessed for a nice 5 act structure, but now dealing with domestic issues will easily take up the act and (semi-legit spoiler) getting there could take up to half of an act. The very quickest I finish the story is with six acts, seeing as I'm planing 1 and a half to 2 and a half acts dealing with actually going east. And even then, there might be enough lose ends to justify another act in addition to the epilogue, but that depends on how I develop Thunder's plotline while anon is in the east.

I have a very clear climax to the overall plot in mind (and have since I decided on the 'going east' as the overall arc), but getting to that point requires a lot of more plot development and in some cases exposition.

Yes much of my writing style is 'oh shit, things are spiraling, well keep going anyway.' But I am very aware of what has previously has been established and how that works into the piece as a whole, so when I say that 'everything is written for a reason': it is, but not quite in the 'I started with a every detail clearly in mind' way, but in the 'storytelling is organic, just see where it goes' way. It's a holdover from when I GM roleplaying games for college buddies

TLDR: To answer your question, if it's meant as 'how long ago in writing were you planning on having anon go east?' since about the mid-end of Act I. If you mean 'how long will the anon going east parts be?' anywhere from 1.5 acts to 2.5 (30k-70k words).
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>>27475072
Also I'll be writing for the next 2-4 hours, and will be monitoring the thread if there are any questions.

(I would have included it it the last post, but character limit still hates me)
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>>27475085
I just want to let you know that I came across your story at 2am (PST) started it and have been marathoning your rollercoaster straight since then (no sleep).

I cant wait to see more from you. You are doing great and I have been highly enjoying it.

I just have one question.

Spike?
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>>27475498
Glad you're enjoying it.

It isn't stated, but aside from Twilight the Mane6+spike are doing their own thing. Headcanon that however you like (Rarity with successful chain, Rainbow as wonderbolt captain, Spike going back to dragon lands etc.), keeping in mind that almost twenty-six years have passed since Flurry's birth.

I have plans for a handful of other show characters that will come into play later, but spike and the other Mane6 aren't any of them. For example, the story was started just before the season premier aired, so I added the bit about Flurry mentioning that her first action was to nearly destroy the CE in a self doubt bit. Also therefore no of mention of Sunburst we'll be getting to that in this act or the next, reasoning for previous spoiler: I was going to do his stuff before the dream sequence in a Flurry scene, but the revelations included made me decide no more Flurry PoV for now, so that scene was rethought to be an Anon one for later
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>>27468028
>…
>After many hours, you couldn’t find a single shred of evidence that Grandma Sapphire’s Donuts is a safe house for the MID.
>That’s to be expected though, torture rarely reveals the truth.
>It more often than not just makes them say whatever it takes to make it stop.
>He spun the best lie he could that would seem believable.
>But why this shop, of all places?
>He could have just as easily named any number of warehouses or less conspicuous areas in the city.
>But to whatever extent he was telling the truth, it’s still the only lead you have.
>So you’re currently walking through the streets, heading for Grandma Sapphire’s.
>And you’re obviously asking to be attacked by whoever is stalking you now.
>You’ve taken the sword and knife off of your belt, the only weapon on you is a brass knuckle you had made a couple decades ago that you slipped into your pocket.
>A few years ago you wouldn’t even have brought it.
>But your knuckles are aching a bit from the blows you placed on the unnamed pegasus earlier today.
>Just as the sun started to set, you set your eyes on the donut shop.
>Clearly a den of nefarious wrongdoing.
>Really it’s the same as any of the other family run businesses across Equestria.
>Quaint and rather innocent.
>A bell rings as you open the door.
>”You one of them mino-tar types? We don’t serve your kind here.”
>An old dark blue crystal pony standing behind the counter shoots your way as she squints through an oversized pair of glasses.
>Grandma Sapphire, presumably.
>”No Gram-gram, that’s the general guy.”
>A younger and lighter blue mare that’s also the counter says to the older one.
>”Sorry about her, her eyesight isn’t what it used to be. Take your time.”
>Nice to see that elderly racism is alive and well no matter where you go.
>>
>>27475989
>You inspect the interior of the building.
>At this hour it’s filled with young couples sharing coffee after a long day.
>You walk over to the counter.
>”You’re… taller than your pictures in the newspaper.” The younger pony says.
“I get that a lot.”
>She whispers the next bit.
>”Really sorry about Grandma, her mind started slipping a few months ago. But, she’s still pretty good at baking, so what’ll it be?”
“Coffee, black. And information while you’re at it. You ever see a light-ish green pegasus in here? Light orange mane, late twenties to early thirties.”
>She turns and starts fiddling with a coffee machine.
>”Oh, that guy. Yeah, every day about this time he comes in to meet another stallion and talk over coffee. Never got their names, but they always take that booth in the corner.”
>’The corner’ is rather secluded from the rest of the tables, the easiest to keep a conversation private.
>Either she’s really good at lying, or she really is just a simple donut shop worker.
>”There’s his buddy now.”
>You turn to see a grey crystal pony standing dead still in the door frame.
>Don’t do it.
>He turns and runs out and immediately runs out into the street.
>And you follow.
>”Don’t you even want your coffee?”
>Definitely a simple donut shop worker.
>>
>>27475997
>As you step into the street, you see the grey pony a few blocks down.
>You give chase, but he takes the next right.
>As you reach the corner, you look down the street.
>Just in time to see him dart into an alley on the left side of the street.
>When you reach it, you see him struggling to climb a chain link fence maybe thirty feet from the mouth of the alleyway.
>You start walking over to him, yanking the pony back to the ground by his tail.
“Don’t know that your spy is dead? Shoddy work.”
>”No, this was all part of the plan, he knew the risks.”
>You hear five, maybe six sets of hoofsteps behind you.
>It’s an ambush.
>You kneel down beside the grey stallion to speak at eye level.
“And this was all part of my plan.”
>You reach out and snap his neck, before rising to face half a dozen ponies.
>All of them are built a bit larger than the average pony: four have swords, one has an axe, and the other is a unicorn.
>You slip your right hand into your pocket and around the brass knuckle.
>You’ll have what you need in a day or two more.
>And besides, the pegasus from earlier knew too much to let live.
>With him dead, the MID know your focus has shifted to them.
>This is thinning the herd.
>>
>>27475072
>getting there could take up to half of an act
Just so you know, I am deeply scared of story arcs that start of by getting on boats.

IT TOOK NINE YEARS DAMNIT
>>
>>27476296
Odysseus was on it for twenty.
(mini update because I'm about to fall asleep, more tomorrow)
>>27476007
>…
“Officer, they’re the secret police and enemies of the state.”
>”Nopony in this city will shed any tears over them, just following proper procedure. Anyway, I think we’re done here, do as you like. Not like we could do anything seeing as you’re Chancellor anyhow. But can I just know one thing?”
“What would that be?”
>”You only had that brass thing and your hands, how is the alley so bloody?”
>You take a glance down it.
>Blood has covered almost the entire ground, and splatters coat about half of the alley walls.
>And that’s leaving out shards of bone and bits of brain.
“You don’t want to know.”
>”I suppose you’re right.”
>And now you have to go get the blood out of your clothes before it sets in.
>Crossing past the police lines, you head back to the Spire.
>Today was certainly eventful.
>>
>>27476419
Yeah, but it didn't take 20 years to write that.
>>
>>27476443
It took one to four centuries of oral tradition for it to be written down by Homer.
>>
>>27476478
Yeah, but I didn't have to wait. It was already there. I wasn't one of those people telling the story and adding my bit during those years, I have no idea what that is like and I doubt you do either.

I was an active berserk reader, though.
>>
Odyssey Bump
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>>27475072
My question was about the length of the whole thing in th east and the answer was about what I had hoped for it to be. I don't think you should worry TOO much about making things go on for too long or anything. I've been reading the story since the first thread and have yet to find a "boring" part in it and I don't think that I will. Keep on writing Thingfag.
>>
page 9
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>>
>before gym bump
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>>27479415
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>>27481096
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>>27482588
>>
Working now, updates within a couple hours
>>27476644
Fair enough.
>>27477655
Happy to hear.
>>
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>>27483682
>updates within a couple hours

Can't wait
>>
>>27476419
>…
>You peered over a cloud onto the streets below.
>It was just past midnight, but the suburbs below were relatively well lit.
>You’ve been scoping out the target house with a pair of binoculars for a few minutes.
>Nothing seems that out of the ordinary.
>Aside from the neighbor watering his lawn at this hour.
>Or the pony that’s been ‘walking’ her dog around the same block for as long as you’ve been in the sky.
>And it’s not even a little lap dog; it’s very clearly a bloodhound.
>There were probably more inside of the target house, or the other homes in the area.
>But seeing as there are ponies watching the house in question, there might not actually be any hostiles inside.
>You need to get a message inside without any suspicion being raised.
>Mail is obviously being read, so that’s out of the question.
>But you have an idea that might just be crazy enough to work.
>…
>You soon found a pizza joint that was open twenty-four hours.
>The cashier is the only one here.
>And she’s currently asleep, not being woken by the bell.
>You quietly head behind the counter, and around a corner.
>Where are the…
>There they are.
>Taking care not to wake the employee, you grab one of the hats and put on a delivery jacket.
>You weren’t wearing much armor, so it easily fit over it.
>Unclipping your sword and sheathe from your side, you slid it into a delivery box.
>You hear a yawn.
>>
>>27484189
>”That you Twenty Minutes?”
“…Yes.”
>You say in as a generic voice as possible.
>”Special order?”
“Uhh, no.”
>”There’s plenty being kept warm.”
>You glance back around the corner, and see that the cashier has went back to sleep.
>Grabbing one of the normal boxes, you stuffed a plain pizza into the box over your sword.
>And you definitely didn’t end up eating half of it on your way back.
>…
>As you neared the neighborhood around the target’s home, you landed, and started walking towards it.
>Making sure to obviously check each house’s address before continuing down the street.
>The mare with the bloodhound passes by you.
>She gives a quick once over with her eyes, and the dog sniffs at you, but they soon continue.
>As you passed the ‘neighbor’ watering his lawn, he gave you a strange look, but didn’t take any action as you knocked on the door.
>A mare’s voice answered the knock.
>”Come in, it’s unlocked.”
>Reaching for the door knob, you open the door and enter the house.
>There isn’t a wall between the entrance and the kitchen, and you see a pink mare with a short and bright yellow mane.
>Matches the description perfectly.
>She’s currently cutting up a few vegetables with a large knife.
>Strange hour of the day to be doing that, but you’re not one to judge the midnight snack.
>You close the door before speaking to the mare.
“Hi, I’ve got three cheese and a calzone, for family by the name of: I’m here to rescue you.”
>>
>>27484193
>She gives you a wide eyed stare.
>”Really?”
“I’m with the military, here to get you and your children out.”
>”Well that-“
>You hear the sound of hooves banging against a door, and a muffled.
>”That’s not me!”
>It’s coming from further inside the house.
>As you glance back to ‘True Love’, you duck as you see a knife in the air coming towards you.
>It lodges itself into the door right where your head used to be.
>And the imposter is now charging straight at you.
>Reaching into the delivery box, you grab the first thing your hoof feels.
>Throwing the pizza box at the mare, it opens in midair and half of a pie lands into her face, giving you enough time to fish out your stashed weapon.
>The remaining pizza is thrown off of the pony as she erupts into a bright green flash.
>What’s standing in front of you…
>Well that’s what changelings looked like in the old slideshows they’d show at boot camp.
>You draw your sword.
>But as soon as it’s free from its sheathe, a bolt of green magic shoots it out of your hoof.
>Whatever spell it used caused the sword to completely shatter as it hit the ground.
>You then get shoulder rushed as the changeling takes flight and bashes you against the door.
>Your front right leg is pinned, but with the left, you reach over and grab the kitchen knife imbedded into the door.
>She-err he, sees this and attempts to knock it away.
>But noticed too late, and the knife embedded itself into the side of the changeling’s neck.
>Pushing the body aside, you shed the delivery hat and jacket, and head towards the direction of the voice.
>You have a maybe a minute before other agents bash down the door.
>At the end of the hallway, you can see a door that’s been fitted with a chain lock.
>”Hello?”
“Just hold on.”
>>
>>27484341
>You slide open the lock, and open the door.
>Inside is an identical mare to the one that the changeling was impersonating, as well as the two foals who are resting their respective cribs.
“Wait, how do I know you’re really you?”
>”How do I know you’re really you?”
>The sound of wood being broken stops the quick impasse.
>You turn to face back down the hall to see the ‘neighbor’ approaching.
>He’s unarmed, but so are you.
>He opens with a wide right hook, and you quickly duck under it.
>But you soon feel an impact into your jaw as he follows with an uppercut from the left.
>You’re then slammed into the door on your right.
>The door gives way, and you’re shot into a bathroom.
>You’re lying on the ground with your back to a toilet, slightly dazed by your head’s impact to the ceramic.
>The attacker enters into the room, and gets on his rear legs.
>He reaches over the sink and rips the mirror cabinet off of the wall, turning towards you.
>He’s intending to bring it down onto you, but he drops it as you give a swift kick up into his crotch.
>The cabinet falls against the sink, and you hear the shattering of glass as bathroom products are scattered onto the floor.
>He’s currently back on all four legs, reeling from the blow.
>So you grasp at a nearby spray can of air freshener, and start spraying it into his eyes.
>Getting back to your own feet, you grab the attackers head.
>And slam it into the sink.
>Between the sound of crashing doors and glass, you can hear a baby start to cry.
>The ‘neighbor’ attempts to punch into your side, but it impacts the armor that you have on.
>You slam his head into the sink once more, and a good portion of the ceramic breaks off as he stops moving.
>He’s unconscious so you let him fall into the rubble.
>As you step out of the bathroom, you hear an aggressive bark.
>>
>>27484425
>You were unprepared for the attack, and the dog knocks you to the ground.
>Operating entirely on instinct, you reach up and snap its neck.
>As you’re starting to push the body off of you, you receive your own sharp kick to the crotch.
>You bite down to alleviate the pain, but are soon pushed onto your back by the dog’s owner.
>She attempts to punch at your face, but you grab the hoof.
>Using all of the strength you can muster, you flip her onto the ground.
>You then grab the leash that was still on the dog’s collar, and wrap it around her neck.
>She tries to elbow you in the face, but due to positioning, can’t get a good angle.
>Her back is against you as you lie on the ground and hold the choke.
>You hold it until she stops struggling, and then some to make sure she isn’t feigning.
>As you look up, you see True Love at the side of a crib, attempting to calm her younger child.
>You start getting up, and as you do you start to unstrap the armor that you do have.
>It’ll just make you easier to spot.
>”Oh my… Are you alright?”
“I’ll live, but we need to go now, there’ll be more coming soon.”
>You enter into the room, and see her holding her youngest.
“Here, give the other one to me, we’ll be able to cover ground quicker that way.”
>”I… just be careful with my little Sunshine, okay?”
>She goes over to the other crib.
>”Mama?”
>”Hey, this nice stallion is going to carry you for a bit dearie, just try and sleep some more.”
>You’re not sure how much of that the three year old filly understood, but it’s more of a reassurance to the mother.
>She bundles up the small red unicorn in a blanket, and you take her with your right hoof.
“Come on, we should leave through the back.”
>…
>>
This is it for the night, I'll try to get in some updates in the daytime tomorrow.
>>27484514
>You return from a trip to the corner drug store.
>It’s a cheap motel, but the owner didn’t seem the type to ask any questions.
>The mother looked visibly startled, and instantly relieved as she saw it was you entering the room.
>You toss the bag to her.
>”What’s this?”
“Black hair dye for the mane and tail. It should make things slightly easier in the morning.”
>”What’s happening in the morning?”
“We’re getting on the first train to Canterlot. After about an hour, we’re going to ditch it. Don’t worry; I’ll take turns flying each of you off of it so there won’t be any jumping involved. After that, it’ll be a bit of a walk, but if we head west for about an hour, we can get to a refueling station for the trains heading north from the capitol to the Crystal Empire. Once we get there, you’ll be safe.”
“Thank you. I didn’t get to say it while we were cutting through back yards and alleys, but thank you.”
>”We’re not out of the woods just yet.”
>You stayed up long enough to let her dye her hair without being needed to watch the children.
>The filly was fast asleep, but the little one was absolutely fascinated with your wings.
>A little grey earth pony with a yellow tail and starting of a mane called Half Eclipse after his father.
>This is a taste of what you’ve got in store.
>Just hopefully with less running.
>In fact, no running at all would be preferable.
>It took an hour before she was ready to let her now black mane dry, so you opted to get as much sleep as you could.
>It’ll only be a couple hours, but it’s better than nothing.
>>
>>27484587
fucked up, should be:

>“Thank you. I didn’t get to say it while we were cutting through back yards and alleys, but thank you.”
”We’re not out of the woods just yet.”
>>
Good stuff as always.
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>>27485382
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>>27486215
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>>27487907
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>>27489112
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>>27490471
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page 9
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>>27491864
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>>27491864
>>
10
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>>27494400
9
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>>27494429
8
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>>27494922
7
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>>27495823
combo breaker
>>27484587
>…
>You sat in the throne of the Crystal Empire.
>Earlier in the day, you had bought a box of cigars, and you flicked off the ash on your current one into the tray you rested on the arm rest of the throne.
>It can’t be good for your health, but seeing as here they leave out the seven thousand or so chemicals in earth tobacco products and that you’re getting old to begin with, you don’t particularly care.
>The sun should be up in a couple hours, but you couldn’t sleep.
>So here you are, sitting on an uncomfortable slab of crystal, smoking in an empty hall.
>But, of course, even at this hour of the early morning, your peace was disturbed.
>A trio of soldiers that you recognize from your Old Guard enters the hall.
>They’re dragging a yellow pony that has obviously just taken quite the beating.
>”Sir, we found this pony trying to pick the lock on the house that you had us start watching a few months ago.”
>That’s the benefit of handpicking the best, and more importantly, most loyal few thousand soldiers to be in your personal forces.
>They don’t question tailing and setting up in an apartment across the street from whomever you ask them to protect from enemies.
>You’re just surprised that it took the MID this long to make an attempt on Amber.
“Tell me.”
>You say to the pony they throw to the ground beneath the throne.
“Was it my recent actions that provoked this?”
>”I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m just a petty thief.”
“That would make you the one petty thief to ever call themselves a petty thief.”
>”It’s the truth. I didn’t expect to be beaten by a half dozen soldiers.”
>>
This post contains the 100,000th word of the story. It's the 'Flurry' at the end of the post. And yes, I purposely made it to be that.
>>27496230
“Oh for cryin’ out loud.”
>You half mutter to yourself in an aside.
“Keep playing the game if you must, but I’m not going to kill or imprison you. Not today at least.”
>You reach into your jacket pocket and pull out a sealed letter.
>”What’s that?”
“Something for somebody much more important to you.”
>You toss it down to the prisoner.
“Send that up the line until it gets to the director, inquisitor, or whatever your top leader is called. And do me a favor; get it there as soon as possible. For what it’s worth you won’t be followed, I know that won’t stop you trying to dodge non-existent tails, but it’s the truth.”
>The letter is an ultimatum of sorts calling for them to turn themselves in.
>The whole ‘bend the knee or be destroyed’ deal.
>Purely a formality, but twenty to one odds say that everyone between this pony and the top of the chain will read it.
>The leaders won’t pay it any mind, but rumors will hopefully spread amongst the underlings.
>He slowly picks up the letter.
“Go on then, shoo.”
>You focus on the soldiers.
“Let him go. And good job, keep up the good work.”
>Soon, you’re the only soul in the hall once more
>It’s Flurry that’s really on your mind right now.
>This is all just one big diversion from the real task at hand.
>And your patience is quite obviously running thin.
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>>27496244
>100,000th word
Counting amends?
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>>27496312
'>'s are counted with the word it's tied to because there isn't a space between it and the word.
Because I write:
>Anon
Instead of:
> Anon
It's counted as one word.

The only iffy bit its that ellipses count as words (for the purposes of Microsoft word). That isn't an issue because they're still 'part' of the word in most cases ('but...' is one 'word'). But because:
>...
Is counted as a word. (CTRL + F says I've got 151 of them.
Also I've got one:
>.
And one:
>---
Meaning that there's still 125 'words' till 100k.

Personally I'd count the ellipses, but now I'm just going to make sure that the 125th word into the next post is 'Flurry'

>It's the only way to be sure.
>>
>>27496374
I get my word count from a line I've got at the end of every act that reads (in the case of act 3):
END ACT III- 23,582 words, 53 pages

I double checked the word count with each of them, and they're still accurate. So to get the actual word count I add the word number from each of them (not including the stats themselves), then highlight down to where I'm currently at. The word document says '100,109' at the bottom, but that's in addition to the end of act stats that I write, and the small list of notes I've got at the bottom of the document.
>>
>>27496244
>You take in a deep drag from the cigar.
>This is all nonsense.
>Nothing was supposed to turn out this way.
>But then again, how did you want it to turn out.
>What do you even want?
>Not in the ‘what do you currently want achieved’ way.
>What do you, Anonymous: the individual, want in life?
>You honestly can’t say.
>Ever since you got into this world, it’s always just been about survival.
>You needed a job and got involved with the military.
>Ever since then, it’s just been about the next battle and the next war.
>For almost twenty-six years, it’s always been about your ‘duty’.
>Maybe during the first few years you tried to have your own life.
>But all that disappeared.
>Flurry, you suppose.
>At this point, the best you can hope for is that she doesn’t get trapped into a life like yours.
>And a good job you’ve done at that.
>Despite her pleas, you forced her into running a country.
>Some father you’ve been.
>Huh.
>The other day, when you were talking with Cadence- well, whatever’s got control of her- you called Flurry your daughter.
>And right now you thought of yourself as ‘father’.
>In over twenty-five years, you’ve always thought and called yourself ‘Uncle’ or even a ‘father-figure’, but never as the actual one.
>She’s always been ‘kiddo’ or ‘your little soldier/girl’ or ‘kid’, but never just ‘daughter’.
>You’ve almost always felt this way, but you suppose it’s taking this… circumstance to just call it like it always has been.
>You might not be blood, but you’re her dad.
>And all you want is to go rip the still beating heart out of whatever is hurting your daughter.
>Even if it’s the last thing you ever do.
>Especially if it’s the last thing you ever do.
>All you ‘want’ is for your child to be safe.
>>
It's 3 AM, this is it for tonight. I was busy in the day, but I should hopefully have more time to write tomorrow.
>>27496631
>You extinguish what’s left of the cigar, and leave it in the ashtray.
>Rising from the throne, you head to the quarters you’ve got in the Spire.
>As you enter the room, you toss your hat on the desk, and hang up your jacket.
>You then unbutton the top of your fatigues and toss it onto the bed.
>The white t-shirt you have underneath it soon follows.
>You then just look at yourself in a larger mirror.
>You’re still in better shape than most men your age would be.
>But setting experience aside, the you from twenty years ago would have snapped current you like a twig.
>Maybe a third of your muscle mass remains.
>You’re getting soft.
>Not anymore.
>Leaving behind the clothes that you shed, you left the Spire and headed for the walls surrounding most of the city.
>Running flat out, you were only able to get around the walls twice before getting tired.
>That's pitiful by older standards.
>The remainder of your day was mostly split between building your endurance back up, and at a gym trying to build back as much muscle as possible.
>Most of your days from here on will be like that.
>You’re past your prime, but you need to be at your peak.
>But for today at least, you turned in around noon.
>You’ve been awake for almost thirty hours, and you’ll need your rest for when Thunder comes back.
>Assuming he’s here at the time you ordered him back by.
>>
page 9
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>>27497581
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>>27496230
>seven thousand or so chemicals in earth tobacco products
>cigars
Don't buy cheap shit from the gas station, nigger. Go to a cigar shop and buy a Perdomo.
>>
>>27499651
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>>27500447
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>>27500476
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>>27501196
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>>27501768
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>>27502473
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GoT is over, writing now, updates within a couple hours
>>27498632
The generalization was because Anon was stated as not being a big smoker and it's from his PoV.
Cheers for the recommendation though.
>>
>>27503475
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>>27503977
No prob. Oh, and the nigger part was direct at Anon, not you
>>
>>27503977
Sounds good.
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>>27505555
not as good as those quads
>>27504842
It's cool.
>>27496744
>…
>You were in private compartment inside of the train For Canterlot.
>In a hushed voice, you spoke to True Love as she tried to keep her youngest child asleep.
“Alright, I want to scope out the rest of the train. Lock the door behind me, when I get back I’ll knock quickly three times and say ‘couldn’t find any’ to the door. If you here those two things, then it’s safe to let me in.”
>…
>The other passengers seem to be more or less harmless.
>Only a few stood out.
>An old officer in dress uniform.
>An earth pony reading a newspaper in the corner of the dining coach.
>And, based on the conversation he was having with his colleague, a private detective with a strange accent.
>The rest just seemed like honest train goers.
>But that doesn’t account for anypony in their own private rooms.
>Before heading back to the others, you wanted to check out the caboose.
>The train car separating it from the rest of the train was just filled with crates that were bound for Canterlot.
>And the caboose itself was empty.
>”What are you doing back here.”
>You jump slightly, and then turn to face a conductor.
>”Dining is at the front.”
>Just a fairly normal orange stallion.
>Wearing a conductor’s vest that was unable to button up the front because it was at least four sizes too small.
>And it has a small blood splatter on the collar.
>And his cutie mark is a closed folder with [CLASSIFIED] stamped on it.
>And he notices you sizing him up.
>”What can I say, didn’t have a lot of time for the disguise.”
“At least you tried.”
>”So, this going to be the hard way?”
>As he fixes his posture, he’s got an easy six inches on you.
>You give the strongest punch you can, and hit him square in the chest.
>Not so much as a flinch.
>”I’ll take that as a yes.”
>He reaches out, grabs your neck, and slams you onto your back.
>>
>>27505636
>You attempt to replicate an early trick, and kick upwards into his crotch.
>Attempt being the operative word.
>He winced, but wasn’t otherwise fazed by it.
>He then grabs you by your chest, and throws you into the wall.
>Your head shattered one of the caboose’s windows.
>As your attacker approaches you, you reach back and grab a sizable shard of glass.
>He stops in his tracks and you start to circle each other.
>You feign a couple of thrusts with the improvised knife.
>Each time he takes a step back before getting closing the distance once more.
>When he gets directly between you and the open end of the caboose, you stretch out your wings and start a flying bull rush.
>Your shoulder impacts him, and he’s forced back by a single step.
>As you attempt jabbing him with the glass shard, you graze his chest.
>But he soon knocks the bloodied glass away from your hoof.
>The following jab hits your jaw.
>The impact made you bite down on the side of your tongue, and you start tasting blood.
>You push back with your wings to get some distance from him.
>Right as your hooves touched the ground, he charged.
>You try and dodge to the right, but he picks you up.
>Running into the train car, as you’re punching and kicking him as best you can, he slams you down into the first wooden crate he can see.
>It breaks under the force.
>You don’t think any of your bones have been injured, but you’ll be picking splinters out of your wings for a week.
>The crate looked to be filled with teapots.
>Grabbing the closest intact one, you strike the attacker in the face with it.
>He reels slightly, and you follow by spitting blood into his eyes.
>Taking the opportunity, you get out of his grasp, taking a pposition further into the car.
>>
>>27505771
>As he clears his eyes, he starts approaching you.
>You flip a crate over into the walkway between you.
>He places his front hooves on it and starts pushing it towards you.
>Before the charge hits you, you take flight and give a swift kick into his face.
>Landing behind him, you turn to face him.
>The tip of his muzzle is slightly off center, presumably broken.
>You start backing up into the caboose.
>You get maybe hallway through the car, and see him start to charge.
>Your wings are battered and splintered, but you start flying as fast as you can towards him.
>The impact occurs between the cars.
>Flying low, you grab onto his torso, getting him into what would look like a bear hug.
>He’s a heavy load, but you manage to slam him downwards, onto the metal that connects the two cars.
>You see his mane start falling down towards the tracks.
>And his head jolts back with a loud crack as it gets caught in the caboose’s wheels.
>His grip immediately goes limp, and you flap your wings to hover before his body falls off of the side.
>He trails beside the wheel before the hair on his mane snaps.
>As that occurred, his body was allowed to fall to the ground.
>But not before at least one of his legs was caught between the wheels and track.
>You immediately start heading for the family, clearing a path back through the cargo car.
>It’ll be a slightly longer walk, but you’d rather not be on the train when they find the conductor that your ‘friend’ presumably killed hasn’t been seen for a while.
>>
>>27505860
I guess that's it for tonight. I promise that tomorrow I'll write in the actual day rather than the wee hours of the morning.
>>
Bimp
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>>27508361
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>>27505636
>>27505771
>>27505860
>mfw based ThingFag ponified the classic Bond train fight scene
not sure if that's what you were intending to replicate; but either way it was straight epic bro, keep up the gud work!
>>
>>27508823
>>
Working for a bit, updates soon
>>27509883
I purposely avoided having the fight go atop the train, and no post death one liner. Aside from that I did play up the genera stereotypes
>>
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>>27505555
>>
>>27505860
>…
>You purposely woke up after only a few ours so you could get back into your proper sleeping pattern tonight.
>It was around four in the afternoon, and seeing as you shouldn’t overly strain your body by working out, you headed down to the Spire’s library.
>And once you arrived there, you started doing something you haven’t done since college.
>Archival research.
>You need to know everything you can about the East.
>Attempted expeditions, survivor reports, even myths and legends.
>Especially myths and legends.
>Back on earth they usually contained some basis in historical fact, but here they have a habit of turning out to have varying degrees of truth behind them.
>As you look throughout the room’s considerable size, you can’t help but miss computers.
>You’ll have to search the old fashioned way.
>The real negative of not having access to databases, is that you have no idea what works containing relevant information are located.
>There could be an incredibly important book written by some scholar that has been forgotten by history, and the only copy of it is located in the depths of some random library, private collection, or college.
>Even the collections in the Crystal Empire’s Spire or the Royal Palace in Canterlot might not have what could help you the most.
>And you certainly don’t have the time to scour Equestria hunting down every scrap of information that could help you.
>Such is life as a historian.
>>
>>27511503
>…
>After a couple hours have passed, you’ve picked out about three dozen books.
>As you sat at a table, about to crack one of them open, a soldier entered the library.
>”Ah, there you are. Sir, Captain Thunder has returned, he’s in the throne room with three guests.”
“Good, as you were soldier.”
>You set the book down, and make your way for the throne room.
>Stepping into the large hall, you see the family.
>All safe and sound.
>Thunder looks a bit bruised, but nothing too serious.
“Ma’am, I’m Anonymous, and I’m glad to see that the three of you are safe. I trust that the trip wasn’t too stressful.”
>”I’m just glad that my children are safe.”
>You whistle off to a side room, and a few members of the Old Guard come into the room.
“These ponies are some of the best we have, they’ll be nearby at all times incase anything happens, but I’d ask that you remain in the Spire for now. I’m sure that you’ll be in need of a proper meal, why don’t you let them take you to a dining room. I’ll bring your husband by soon.”
>”I… thank you.”
“And you.”
>You approach Thunder.
>Part of you wasn’t sure if he was up to it.
>You took that gamble and it paid off.
“Good job. Take some time to yourself before giving me a report; I’ll let you know when you’re needed… And you might want to get checked out by a medic.”
“If it’s all the same to you, I’d rather just go home and sleep for… a long while.”
“At least get an ice pack.”
>You pat him on the shoulder.
“You’ve earned the rest.”
>>
>>27511514
>…
>As you enter into Eclipse’s cell, he looks up at you.
>You slide your hand over the crystal that controls the door.
“Come on, I’ve got three ponies that are expecting you.”
>”They… they’re here?”
>He picks himself off of the cell’s floor.
>And the stench of weeks of isolation hits you as he approaches.
“You might want to clean up a bit first.”
>After leading him to a bathroom so he can shower, you took him to his family.
>As soon as the door opened, the husband and wife immediately ran over to embrace each other.
>You kept your distance to let them have their moment.
>And so he could see his daughter once more, and meet his son for the first time.
>…
“Alright, you’ve got your family, now I need to know everything that you do.”
>”I’m sorry but I don’t have much. While I was in this city, I would regularly meet a grey stallion. He never gave his name, and the meeting would always be in a different place.”
“But?”
>”But, while I was on-duty I had the same patrol for a couple weeks. Every morning at exactly seven, I would see that same stallion go into an office building. He was always alone and about half of the time carried a briefcase.”
“Where?”
>”Four story building a few blocks from the western gate.”
“And there’s nothing else?”
>”I… yes, a couple mornings he would hold the door open so a light green pegasus could enter behind him.”
>Not many pegasi in the Crystal Empire.
>Matches the description of the pegasus who was following you, and the grey one who led you into the alleyway.
>>
From here on, I'll make sure to write around a thousand words (4 posts worth) during the day, and another thousand in the night. (there might be days when there's more, but that's the minimum I'll do)

More tonight
>>27511522
“Alright. Now, your family will be staying under protection here in the Spire until further notice. After that, you’ll just be another family moving into one of the homes the government seized. You’ll all need new names. Eclipse, you’ll probably need to dye your mane as well to be on the safe side.”
>You turn to his wife.
“You should avoid writing; at the very least avoid anything near to any genera you’ve ever published.”
>”Actually, I might have an idea for a spy novel. Don’t worry; I can shift my writing style enough.”
“I’m going to set up a couple soldiers I trust to be reassigned to the garrison where you’ll be at. We’ll deal with the details later, but if anything so much as seems out of the ordinary, tell them. While you’re here now, there will always be at least half a dozen men in the closest room to you. Until things blow over, you’ll be safe.”
>With that, you left the family to their own devices.
>Deciding to turn in, you stopped by the library to move the books from earlier to your quarters.
>In the few hours you had before heading to sleep, you started running through possible plans of action.
>You’ll have quite a bit to do in the following days.
>>
>>27512183
>>
i think i have an alcohol problem
>>
yep i definitely have an alcohol problem
>>
>>27514087
Why?
>>
>>27512183
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>>27514464
the daily grind is wearing me down
i thought I would be able to have hobbies and stuff outside of work once I got a decent job, but now I'm always feeling like shit and just want to sleep whenever I'm not working
>>
>>27515125
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>>27516230
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>>27516762
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9
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>>27518128
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>>27519008
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>>27520500
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page 9
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>>27522060
>>
Sorry, I've just completely crashed and burned after that previous bit. I've re-written and scrapped the upcoming posts a dozen times. Bear with me, I think I've got something I'll be content with coming up soon.
>>27515468
I know a part of that feel, took a shot for you m8.
>>
>>27523526
be the better man!
>>
>>27511536
>…
“Ahh.”
>”Oh quit being such a baby.”
>Winter rips another splinter out of your wing.
>It’s not the wood shards themselves that hurt, but some of the larger ones have left some considerable openings that she’s dousing with rubbing alcohol.
>Still though, the benefits of having a nurse for a wife are becoming apparent.
>But on your way over here, you heard something… disconcerting from one of your lieutenants.
>And by piecing it together with what you saw on the top of the Spire before leaving, it gets worse.
>The pegasus that was spying on the Marshal was found dead at the bottom.
>But the wounds reported on the body were… improbable for a simple fall, even from that height.
>And so long ago when you found the Field Marshal after the hospital attack.
>The good guys aren’t supposed to torture or even make that threat, right?
>You were ready to dismiss it.
>But then you heard about the alleyway.
>He beat half a dozen ponies to death with little more than his bare hands
>At least two of the attacker’s heads were reduced to nothing but shattered bone and scattered brain.
>You know better than most what the adrenaline of a fight can do to a soldier, but that’s just plain excessive.
>You guess that he’s trying to send a message, but doesn’t that just put him on their level?
>You’re starting to wonder if he would threaten the families of his enemies if it would give him the upper hoof.
>”Hey, you okay? Your back feels really tense.”
“I’ll be fine. Just need some rest.”
>>
>>27524152
>…
>The following morning you brought Thunder in to give his report.
>The only thing that stood out was there was a changeling posing as the wife.
>The implications could be… problematic.
>But with nothing else you needed from him, you sent him back home.
>You even made it an order to ‘relax a bit’.
>With the Captain gone, you summoned the other officers of your Old Guard that were in the Crystal Empire.
“Alright, listen up cause I’m only saying this once.”
>…
“And remember, time is of utmost importance. Every second the building isn’t secured, is a second that more vital information will be destroyed. If they try to surrender, let them. But if they as much as look at a weapon, do what you have to. You have your orders.
>With that you started climbing the spire.
>…
>You looked to the west.
>Standing amid the one or two story buildings by the western gate was a large mound of concrete and glass.
>It was just about noon, any second now the bells will start-
>You hear bells start ringing in the city below.
>Soon after, you see a hundred or so pegasi descending on the office complex.
>They’ll be leading the attack, breaking through windows on every floor of the building.
>On the ground another hundred earth ponies and unicorns will be storming the ground based entrances.
>As your men break through, you can see isolated bursts of magic light up some of the rooms.
>There will be casualties, but somewhere in the building there will be a link back to their headquarters.
>Then you can cut the head off of the snake.
>After a few minutes or so of watching the distant fighting, a pair of pegasi pulling a chariot land on the top of the Spire.
>They take you over to the roof access, as one of your bloodied unicorns blasts it off of its hinges and steps out to give his report.
>”Sir, building secured.”
>>
>>27524154
seriously fuck that part.

I ran through three different attacks from Anon's PoV and two as Thunder. None of them particularly worked for me, so I just ripped the bandage off quickly to get it over with.

More coming tomorrow
>>
I don't know what's happening right now.
>>
>>27524227
In the story, my comments, or something else?
>>
>>27524261
The story!

The traitor got his family returned to him safely, gave useless information to anon, then someone who somehow got a bunch of splinters in his back is being treated by a nurse and then some people are talking about how anon is getting pretty brutal and then some random group of people are invading a building for some reason?
>>
>>27524278
Traitor outed an office building that two of the MID agents Anon killed were seen repeatedly going into in the early morning, makes assumption that building is a base.
>>27524152
This is Thunder's PoV with his wife (Winter) picking splinters out of his back in a reference to the line back in >>27505771
>You don’t think any of your bones have been injured, but you’ll be picking splinters out of your wings for a week.
And calls into question Anon's recent methods
>>27524154
This post is back to Anon's PoV where he gets a report from Thunder, then benches him until further notice, and calls in loyal officers to have them attack the office building that has a connection to the MID, then watches from the spire as his men assault the building before heading down there himself
>>
>>27524313
Ah, thanks.
>>
>>27524342
Hopefully this clarifies a bit
>>27524154
“Situation report.”
>”The first three levels belong to an insurance firm, no resistance was met and the civilians are being held for further questioning.”
“And the fourth?”
>You begin going down the stairs, exiting on the top floor.
>”According to the secretary downstairs, it’s only registered under royal authority. We met heavy resistance, mostly unicorns. Half of the pegasi wave was dead before ground forces could reinforce. Wounded are being sent to the hospital, and we’ve got the surviving prisoners rounded up and under guard.”
>As you step out of the stairwell, you can see the damage to the floor.
>Overturned desks, broken glass, blood spatters, impacts from physical and magical attacks, and the bodies of the MID forces as well as your own.
>A single room made up the core of the fourth floor, with smaller rooms ringing a hallway that goes around the main area.
>Half of the larger room is made up of various cubicles, while large (now mostly shattered) panes of glass separated a larger conference room.
>In the conference room you can see tables with maps of the city, the Crystal Empire, and Equestria as a whole atop them.
>Old propaganda posters and seals of the Ministry of Interior Defense line the solid walls.
“And you’re sure the entire building has been cleared?”
>”Down to every cubicle, bathroom stall, and janitor’s closet. Over there is a smaller meeting room where we’ve got the prisoners at.”
>He says as he points across to a door flanked by flag poles, one flying the national flag and another of the Ministry’s.
“Good job Lieutenant, keep them there while I take a look around.”
>>
>>27524424
I appriciate it and look forward to your future posts.
>>
>>27525439
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>>27526140
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>>27526658
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>>27527119
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page 8
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>>27431156
Bump
>>
>page 9
>>
>>27530099
>>
10
>>
I'm here, going for an all-nighter to regularize my sleeping pattern. I'll do an update dump in few hours
>>
>>27532672
rip my sleep schedule
>>
>>27532672
damnit man, i like to think i have a life!
>>
>>27532672
fuck i'm gonna head to bed

later
>>
>>27530649
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>>27534850
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>>27536928
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>>27537672
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page 10
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>>27540318
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>>27539407
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>>27541540
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>>27542160
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>>27542844
>>
morning bump
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>>27543911
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>>27543921
>>
so much for that all nighter
>>
Life sucks, people are cunts. Needed a break from everything. I'll be back later today
>>
>>27544702
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9
>>
>>27546102
Sorry to hear that m8
take as long as you want.
>>
>>27547926
>>
>>27546102
>>
>>27546102
I can relate
We can all wait
We all anticipate
An MID to emancipate
Or an enemy's bait
Or flurry to proclamate
To see Anon's fate
A hero too late
Or death to sate
The agenda of state
So I will state
We will wait
A story thats great
Not one to hate
I offer a poem to satiate
And for anons to elate
A toast to you, Thingfag
God speed mate
>>
>>27549352
>>
>>27550054
>>
Take these for now, I'm halfway through the next bigger scene and want to post it in one go, so more tomorrow.
>>27524424
>…
>In the morning you gave your report to the Marshal.
>You don’t think he said anything aside a variation of: ‘go on’.
>Well, aside from ordering you to ‘relax’ that is.
>As soon as you left, you passed a group of officers entering the debriefing chamber.
>Every other officer from his personal forces in the city was there except you.
>And you’re theoretically the highest ranked member of it aside from the Field Marshal himself.
>But maybe you’re just looking into things too much.
>You are still pretty bruised up from your previous mission.
>And once you got back to the Crystal Empire, Winter took off work for the rest of the week.
>Maybe he really just wants you to take some time off and spend some time with your wife.
>So you did just that.
>You found yourself in a park, sitting next to a pond with Winter.
>After a bit of assorted small talk, a pair of ducks swam past with a few ducklings following closely.
>This prompted the million bit question.
>”So… what do you think we should name her?”
“Or him.”
>”It’ll be a filly, call it maternal instinct.”
“Is that code for: start painting the room pink?”
>”Now that you mention it, there just happens to be a few cans of paint in my shed.”
“Oh is there now?”
>”Come on, names. Give me your best one.”
>>
>>27549565
Hey, we actually got more content
Cheers
>>27551509
“I don’t know. Purple… Rain.”
>”That’s… an idea.”
“Come on, I’m terrible with names. When I was five, my parents got me a dog and let me name it. I came up with ‘Dog’.”
>”Really?”
“There was also Cat the cat, and Fish the goldfish. And yes, Cat ate Fish after a week. He was replaced by Fish 2… and Fish 3, then Fish 4, and it went like that for a while. In retrospect I should have just put a lid or something atop the fish bowl.”
>”Oh stop it, you.”
“Really though, I think that once we see her for the first time, we’ll just know.”
>”Oh! While I remember it, I was going to stop by to pay a surprise visit to my sister a few days ago, and you’ll never guess who I saw-“
>Winter is cut off as a nearby clock tower starts ringing.
>Noon.
>”Hey, what’s that?”
>She nods over towards the Spire.
>As you turn you see at least a hundred pegasi flying in formation, heading westward.
>You can just make out that they’re wearing armor.
“I should-“
>”Go.”
>Before you can leave, your wife pulls you in for a kiss.
>”And let your wings rest, you’ll just injure them more.”
>Nice to see her nurse instincts are still working just fine.
“Yes dear.”
>With that, you started galloping towards where the soldiers were headed.
>>
>>27551516
>…
>Although you couldn’t see where the soldiers were actually going, the growing crowds helped you find your way.
>A four story office building with most of its window’s shattered, presumably due to the pegasi.
>Ground forces were holding back civilians from getting to close to the building, and by the time you arrived; it sounded like any battle that had taken place had ended.
>As you work your way out of the crowd, a soldier tries to stop you.
>”Back up, sir. Oh, sorry Sir; didn’t recognize you for a second.”
“What exactly happened here?”
>”Head on inside, I’m sure somepony that’s higher ranked would be better suited to explain it.”
>As you enter through the main doors, you meet a reception are.
>Soldiers surround a few dozen civilians that are sitting on the ground.
>”Why can’t we just go?” One of the prisoners says as he starts to stand.
>He’s met with a pair of raised spears being pointed his way, they stay fixed on him until he sheepishly sits back down.
>Seeing you enter, one of your Lieutenants approached you.
>He gave a basic rundown of the operation.
>Civilians on the first three floors, and what looks like an MID center of operations on the fourth.
>They met heavy resistance when they stormed the floor.
“Wait, you were just sent in without any prior intel? And the Marshal didn’t even take part in the battle?”
>”Affirmative to both. Down here the civies are being held until the Field Marshal gives the all clear, and we’ve got the MID prisoners under watch upstairs. That about covers it.”
>>
>>27551520
>Taking your leave, you started up the stairs.
>You have a few words for the Marshal…
>As you reach the top floor, you ask one of the soldiers up there for his location.
>He points you towards one of the offices.
>You enter the office and you see the Marshal sitting at a desk, skimming through files.
>”Didn’t I order you to rest up?”
>He says without looking up from the file.
>You close the door before saying anything.
“Sir, can I speak frankly?”
>”You’re going to with or without my permission. Sit.”
>You pick up an overturned chair and sit across the desk from your superior.
>There’s a gentle breeze from the broken window.
“What are you doing?”
>”Reading through files, but I don’t know why you need that tone of voice to ask.”
“Ever since that first night in the Everfree, you’ve been different. Torture, excess brutality; and just sending two hundred ponies to attack a civilian structure, on the word of one prisoner, AND without any other intel. You didn’t even lead the fight.”
>“Is there supposed to be a point in that rambling?”
“Come on, you’re acting like one of our enemies!”
>Before you can continue he reaches across the table and slaps you.
>It… caught you off guard.
>He tosses the file aside, and leans forward.
>”Need I remind you who we’re fighting? The MID were a secret police that kept the populace subservient through blackmail, threats, and torture. But fine, set aside the countless nationwide crimes. In this year alone, they’ve: tried to start a war in the frontier just so they could more easily assassinate Flurry and myself, bombed a train to kill me (and had it been successful, you would have been in the blast radius as well), laid siege and caused significant damage to a hospital, most likely assisted in the destruction of a third of Canterlot, threatened a pony’s wife and children to make him do their deeds, spied on me, and attacked me in the streets.”
>>
If anyone needs me, I'll be drinking. See you next hangover.
>>27551524
“Sir, that’s not what I mean-“
>”If you want to compare me to them, then I suggest you take an actual look at the situation. Yes, it was a risk sending in these men. But if I have to send them in blind, I rest comfortably in that they’re the best soldiers in this army. Each member of my Old Guard volunteered to be part of my personal forces; they all know what that means. And each one of them would do the same, because if a few deaths here stop hundreds from dying in a bombing or lets dozens of families sleep easier, every one of them would take that risk.”
“But does that justify torturing them and bashing their skulls open.”
>”Listen close, cause I’m only saying this once. I don’t care that they tried to have me killed; I deal with that risk almost daily. But when they threaten the only family I have, it gets personal. If you can honestly say that if they tried to kill your wife or unborn child, that you wouldn’t act the same way, then you’re lying. When I spoke to you atop the Spire, I laid out everything I know. Don’t make me reevaluate that trust.”
>He pauses, and you find yourself at a loss for words.
>”Now go home. This will be the first and last time we speak of this. You are a soldier and an officer, I expect you to act like one. Such naivety is unbecoming.”
“…Yes Sir.”
>>
>hit my head
>real bad concussion (i can't remember the word and have to keep looking it up now)
>delirious and drugged up for two weeks
>back at it and better now
>except all of my previous fetishes now disgust me and I can't get a boner
fuck you too, brain
>>
>>27551531
Remember kids, the quickest way to summon an author: Speak in his tongue, calling to him
>>
bubba thread
>>
>>27552551
>>
>>27551552
Does this mean you are no longer going to try to get Anon to fuck Flurry?
>>
>>27555008
>>
>>27556219
>>
>>27557148
Thread replies: 255
Thread images: 15

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