>Chapter starts with:
>"to say x was having a bad day would be an understatement."
name 1 book that does this
>>8030832
>thread posts start with:
>"name 1 book that does this"
>>8030852
name2thread that does this
>>8030962
in order for that spoiler to be justified you also needed to spoiler the conjugation
>book starts with a provocative statement about the main character
>>8030826
>book starts with *record scratch* Yep, that's me. you're probably wondering how I got into this situation.
>>8030826
>book starts with main characters mother being dead
>>8031015
>he didn't mouse over
>first chapter is the author persuading you to not read the book
>>8030826
>book is written in past tense
>>8031752
>book is written in future tense
>>8031769
>book is written in second person future tense
>book is actually a nigger telling you to give him your money
>book was written before 2010
>>8031815
I'd read it.
>book starts with main characters name
>>8031736
>intro disclaimer is telling you to get professional advice instead of reading the book.
>book has chapters.
>>8031837
>book has manifested itself physically
>>8031846
>idea of book exists
>>8031835
>intro of the book is warning you not to look for morals in it
>>8031820
You gonna take that wallet out you bitch ass pocket an put it on the fuckin floor honkey
>>8030826
I'm going to start a chapter with this specifically because of this thread
>book
>it ain't me starts playing
>book has a musicality to it
>like Beethoven
>book starts with:
><main character>was<performing routine task> when
>>8030826
>Chapter starts with a description of the weather
>>8030826
>thread filled with idiots
>>8031715
Babar?
>book consists of words
>>8032351
The sky above the port was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel.
>>8032456
>book doesnt have pictures
>>8032456
>book consists of letters
>book is written well
>book ends with surrealistic montage
>>8032458
Neuromancer
>>8032458
the television above the port was the colour of a channel, tuned to a dead sky
>a book set in a fantasy world is not completely written in the native language of that land
>>8032575
>book is actually a fashion catalogue in disguise
>>8032698
>it actually is. In a grand coincidence, all the words in their language look like English words, but have completely different meanings
>book starts with 'the' instead of 'a'
fuck only use 'the' if its an object the reader already knows about
>>8033015
but what if it happens to refer to something we do already know about, like the sun, or the ocean or the sky hmmmmm?
checkmate dingus
>>8033031
GOD
DAMMMMMMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
>>8032296
Kek
>book has a character
>believing in mental states
>book is set in time and place
>book
>reading
>>8030826
name 1 (one) example
>>8033502
>>8035208
>book isn't set in time or place
>>8033015
You're an idiot.
>>8031769
> book is written
>>8031715
agreed, ulysses is such trash
>book doesn't have a movie adaptation I can watch instead
>>8031829
>book starts with two or more character names dropped in a single paragraph
>they're all some bullshit fantasy names
>>8032575
I think a lot of people on /lit/ understand this feeling.
>tfw I can't write like the greats
>tfw I never will
>>8032122
Intro of the book is Stirner laughing madly in his blind alley
t. Camus
>to say x was having a bad day would be a statement
>>8030826
>book isn't written in an ancient dead language I need to transcribe using a dictionary from that language
>book has an ending
>>8031715
>aujourd'hui maman est morte
>Book begins
>[Main Character Name] [verb]'d the [made-up device or object] with [adverb]
>>8036137
hahaha
>Book begins
>"My name is [x]"
>"You can call me [x]"
>"I first met [x] when..."
>"[x] and me..."
>the first line in the book is: "Dr. Pavel, I'm CIA."
>>8032349
I can't avoid this when I write. "Anon was having an intellectual literary connection when his internet connection cut off".
On thread: character "decides" things that are not a decision:
>she decided the sound she heard downstairs was a dog barking in a tin bin
no you don't bitch you don't decide it it's outside your agency you can't decide this
and: child characters rolling their eyes at adults and calling everything stupid and then being proved right by the author.
>>8036536
Ever read Don Quijote?
>>8036539
n-nodon't shame me publicly senpai
>>8036544
It has a pretty interesting take on those kinds of decisions - and it's a marvelous and profound work of literature I'd heartily recommend to you.
>character is a writer
>book isnt a frozen piss block i have to taste and infer whatever the author meant
>>8032622
Burroughs/10
>as you know
then why the fuck are you tellin gme
>have to use hands, eyes, and brain to read book
Guys, I dont think this semen slurping hobby is for me.
