Do I really need to read this thing to understand allusion and references in other pieces of literature, or are the stories and ideas in it so well absorbed that it would be a waste of time?
>hasn't even read the bible
modern /lit/, everyone
>>7934530
>do I need to read the book that's influenced western society for nearly 2000 years?
Most Xtians don't read it, but we're better than that, were /lit/ and we're challenge accepted .
Its not hard and worth it for all the bugfuck , head-scratching craziness hidden within.
>>7934575
>Its not hard and worth it for all the bugfuck , head-scratching craziness hidden within.
idiot
>>7934575
Most "Christians" would reject Christianity if they actually read it.
>>7934575
You've obviously never read it or you skimmed through it with atheist goggles on
>>7934584
Most "Christians" are bad Christians. Twas ever thus. The narrow gate, etc.
>>7934530
it's a brilliant book when you read it as satire.
>holy shit, this guy was 950 years old when he died. WTF? kek.
>Oh, snap, Christ is the Logos. He's a fucking word? Christ is a word, yo!
>Ecclesiastes just don't give a fuck about nothing. “Meaningless! Meaningless!” says the Teacher. “Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless.”
>Stonings, hanging, immolations, killing little kids, reading about cities that essentially get nuclear-striked by God, etc. pshaw!
>>7934597
I feel bad for people like you
>>7934530
when you're ready to read it you'll read it.
you can work backwards, no book is ruined because you didn't pick up on X biblical allusion
>>7934582
It turns out , I'm not in fact an idiot, but inside sources have revealed that you are in fact an enormous cancerous scrotum, nobody likes you and you and you were conceived by accident when your mother sat in hobo semen.
>>7934588
I readcthe damned thing. More than once.
>athiest goggles
Aka: reason. Aka: the opposite of Faith Goggles
Why you mad, tho? You're supposed to forgive me.
>>7934628
Whoa, whoa, whoa, guys. Let's judge people by the content of their character, and not by the method of their conception.
>>7934633
>muh empiricism
Any self respected citizen of western society should give the Bible a read. I'm an atheist, but I consider it an essential. The stories are interesting and referenced in so many works of literature that it's worth your time.
Its nice to learn the context of Bible quotes, which are sometimes misunderstood.
e.g."...an eye for an eye".
>>7934659
You think the entire thing is worth reading as opposed to reading the relevant stuff?
>>7934653
Why don't you pray yourself a new cell phone, Skippy?
Mine runs on science.
>>7934671
Skip around. Some of it you can just skip.
>>7934676
It actually runs on electricity, redditor, and good luck charging it in Hell.
>>7934530
you don't "need" to, but it's really interesting
i'm glad i did
even when the old testament felt useless there would always be something that would be surprising and perk me up
i also read the quran, and must say that while the bible was worthwhile as its own experience, the quran is only useful to know about how fucked islam is (was not expecting to draw that opinion). (i assume for a muslim the quran is worthwhile because their culture has the constant allusions)
>>7934710
Lol. It's your hell, you burn.
>>7934767
nah
>>7934603
You feel sorry bc hecread the Bible? And quted it factually?
More crazy shit:
>Noah's daughters get him drunk and fuck him
>Fetus Jesus meets Fetus John the Baptist and they are like: Hey, dude!
>A guy asks God to stop the sun so he can win a battle
>The creation of Eve;first Genesis says Adam and Eve were created together. Then it seemingly forgets about Eve and God makes her again at Adams request (bad continuity)
>>7934530
Well you see, the problem is that once you've read the gospels, you realize that you never need to read anything ever again.
>>7934784
This is a delight. Honestly , my dear little Lamb of God. You should read your Instruction Book. It's interesting. It says a lot more than just: 'don't be gay'.
It's easy to say you're a Christian, hard to do. It's much easier to just be a hypocrite like you are.
>>7934597
>WTF? kek
i should have stopped here. i will never forgive your parents for bringing about your existence
>>7934784
You are not a smart guy. I would also recommend , if you choose to learn , God Is Not Great. It's a book written by Christopher 'Genius' Hitchens. It will teach you a lot. It's good , unless you are the moron you are.
>>7934801
It was Lot's daughters, you knuckle-dragging retard.
>>7934822
Speaking of which... Did you know that God gave birth to himself by impregnating his own mother? No, really!
>>7934825
Decent bait, you should have drawn it out for a few more posts.
>>7934822
>Christian.
>never forgive
Pick
>>7934832
I've read the Bible, faggot. I'm familiar with the gospels and preschool-level theology.
>>7934837
Who said I was Christian, dipshit? I don't have to be religious to notice severe mental disability.
>>7934831
Sorry I got your heroic daughter fucking characters confused.
Blessed are the knuckle draggers for they are not butthurt like a.non
fucking christ
you don't have to believe it to appreciate it
the kjv, at least, is one of the most beautiful liturgical expressions of rhetorical and artistic sublimity in the english language
i'm not fucking around
it's that good
you still take it with a grain of salt
but that doesn't mean you can dismiss the whole thing out of hand either
besides being well-written, the kjv is influential
you'd be hard pressed to find a work of english literature that hasnt quoted referenced or taken cues from the kjv
>>7934843
Those are big words for somebody who sleeps with his daddy's dick next to his buttocks
>>7934844
Why are you posting here? You're getting basic biblical characters confused. How can you think you know even the basics of literature if you aren't familiar with the most important text in the canon?
>>7934851
You're embarrassing yourself. You've exposed yourself as a pseudo-intellectual cro-magnon who can't appreciate the fucking Bible as an important component of western literature. Regardless of what positivist cock you're sucking, I suggest you either fuck off back to fuckyeahscience.com or have a good long think about your ability to understand the basis of most western art.
yes. read it. it's important and actually really great if treated as literature and not holy
>>7934852
Take Yahweh's veiny cock out of your mouth for two seconds and think about what you just said.
>>7934864
Oh look - the god-botherer is getting angry!
>>7934870
I'm not even remotely Christian. You're not getting anywhere with that argument. Which sentence exactly should I re-read? If it's 1, like I'm expecting, it's because I enjoy fucking literature. If it's 3, I have no idea what you're trying to say, but I'm guessing you're trying to weasel out of something.
>>7934864
I am pro reading the Bible. It's a hoot. It's full of muh Western values and le poetry and Jesus is a great character. I appreciate the majesty of religious art I've been to the Florence and seen Carravagios, Michelangelo's, Booticellis, etc.
It's YOU I don't like. You cannot cloak yourself in thr majesty or granduer of religion. You are a little prick.
Here's pic related for your butt hurt
>>7934895
So, I was right on sentence 3. Good to know. Just to make this clear, your point is:
>bible's p cool even though i've been making some posts about it that sound like a child who has just read dawkins for the first time
>but you're just a meanie and are clearly religious even though that's never been part of the argument.
Also, where exactly did you go in "the Florence"? Uffizi? Stibbert? Would you recommend the museum in particular? I've been meaning to go there again, I was too young to appreciate it last time.
Science as generalization is unable to account for unique events which is what miracle and revelation are. The divine word and the holy spirit are our only way to account for these truths.
>>7934903
*those museums
>>7934906
Durp. Found the dumbshit.
>>7934916
Found the redditor
