What were his final thoughts?
>>7722581
"My belt is too tight."
>>7722581
>"Pynchon, I have failed you."
*sniffs fart*
"no discernible talent"
FUCK YOU BLOOM
"I should've killed Karr's husband"
"And but so..."
"i wonder what people will think of this"
tragically, i feel this is accurate.
>>7722581
>finally, i will become part of the infinite jest
just do it just do it just do it just do it just do it just do it
"how banal"
>>7722599
This would make a lot of sense actually.
What's the nearest footnote to "And but so"?
I have a spanish translation and want to see how they did it.
>>7722581
an ever-deepening spiral of self-loathing and -blame and shame over causing pain to those who loved him, both in life and in death
"This'll make The Pale King fly off the shelves!"
>>7722581
"this REALLY hurts"
I should have put my head in a microwaves...
>>7722735
Are you me from the last time this thread was posted?
>>7722748
something smells GOOD
To be serious, probably regret as he dangled from the rafters on the patio (pic related). I doubt, considering both his height and the fact that he used a belt, that he died instantly and was probably slowly strangled (he also duct taped his wrists together so he wouldn't be able to free himself. I remember reading about a suicide attempt that jump from the golden gate bridge. as soon as he vaulted over the railing-- instant regret and realization that he didn't want to die anymore. I imagine dave convulsing and kicking his feet at the chair he jumped from, wide eyed, thinking how much he loves his wife despite her irritating flaws and sub-Karr intellect, suddenly is incredibly embarrassed, and he wants to hurry up and free himself so his wife won't have to find his dead body, not to mention totally banal and self-concious suicide note. Realizing it's futile he relaxes and accepts his fate, this is it, it's over, nothing to worry about anymore. As he fades into the abyss he hears the muffled whining of his dog through the glass door, as if desperately speaking to him for the first time: "what are you doing friend? are you okay? I love you"
this be too easy
>>7722780
yeah probably that
>>7722581
I don't know, but I'm pretty sure he tried really hard to think of something clever.
>>7722581
"I wonder if my wife be cry"
"my neck hurts"
>>7722581
Oh shit, my house is on fire! I better hang myself before the flames get to me.
>>7722780
Jesus I think you just stopped me from committing suicide.
>>7722915
Well the bit about the dog elevates the piece to a heroic(or at least dramatic) act, which is not really what you want to do when talking about suicide.
>>7722780
>not to mention totally banal and self-conscious suicide note
I actually met Wallace in a shopping mall in the early 2000's. He didn't know what the word banal meant, and he got scared by his own reflection in one of the shops windows, thereby failing the mirror-test and proving that he had no self-awareness.
>>7722581
I hope it wasn't regret. If you're going to kill yourself, be 100% sure of it. Every person who jumped off the golden gate bridge intending to kill themselves (but somehow survived) said that they felt regret the second they jumped.
>>7722581
Instant regret as he realized that he accidentally left an unrevised grammatical mistake in his suicide note.
>see if you can discern THIS talent!
>>7722581
"Infinite Jest was a mistake."
FBI? CIA? Wha—nononononononononononononononoIt was the IRS. Wonder what he stumbled across...
Most likely "Should I really go through with this?" Or "Fuck it"
Followed by a feeling of embarrassment knowing that someone will find his hanging corpse, soaked in his own shit and piss, eyeballs bleeding... Also the fact that his family and friends will make a fuss over his death. I reckon he died embarrassed.
Red faced, quite literally.
fuck this hurts fuck this hurts i should've od'd instead fuck this hurts
i'm off my rocker
Cam you even think in that situation? Doesn't panic and pain overtake anything and you just become an animal fighting for life?
>>7723419
he was a great thinker so why would he waste hsi gifts .. ?
>>7722581
After the chair was kicked away, a rush overcame him, I am sure of this. The sad part is, I am sure he was filled with regret and wanted to undo what he had done moments after. But we will never understand the full extent of his actions or his thought process since we have not seen or heard of the suicide note.
Mother fucker should have chilled and read some meditations for god's sake.
>>7722623
>truly, we are an infinite jest
>>7722999
10/10
He preemptively wrote his moment-of-suicide thoughts in his short story Good Old Neon.
>>7722780
Pretty sure Dave gave his dogs away because he couldn't be bothered to take care of them.
Other than that, yeah this is probably close. Realizing you're about to shut the lights off for good probably makes your problems feel small all of a sudden.
"Smart phones are worse than the Entertainment"
>>7722581
"Time for an infinite rest."
"I wish I weren't illiterate."
>>7723025
Every person? Really, every single person? Do you have a source for that?
I'm certainly not convinced, I've been in a psych ward, and I spoke to three different people there who had attempted multiple times.
>>7722908
likely
>>7726611
>attempted
Eating a bunch of OTC meds in an unlocked bathroom with a dozen people in the apartment isn't an earnest attempt to die. That describes every single suicide attempt I've personally encountered.
>>7726711
Most psychologists, and psychiatrists disagree with you, the epistemic authorities on the matter. One of these guys, though, jumped in front of a car. He told me he suffered multiple breakages to both of his legs, a broken arm, fractured ribs, and a cracked skull. However, obviously not fast enough.
>>7726745
They disagree with me on what? That an easily interfered-with and likely not fatal at all action is actually a cry for help, or that such incidents aren't the majority of suicide attempts? Because I have no idea what percentage of attempts are earnest and how many are something else.
I guess it's just hard to believe that all this iffy stuff isn't done to hold out some hope of survival, since exit bags and guns are so foolproof and instantaneous.
>>7726756
I don't think you appreciate the fact that most suicidal people are desperate, and not thinking clearly. Many don't have the presence of mind to plan an elaborate suicide, or the energy to pull one off, and usually want to do die as soon as possible. So, many grab whatever is immediately to hand, which if you don't have a gun, is probably going to be pills. You also have to keep in mind that many are not aware that drugs are not an effective method, as they are often portrayed as lethal in the media, films and TV, and so on.
>>7722581
"So this goes above or below my adam's apple?"
>>7722581
David be cry
>>7726711
I met this woman at an AA meeting who had tried to cut her own throat. It left a nasty scar and she was so out of it she couldn't walk and had to get pushed around in a wheelchair.
Trump was right.
>>7726604
The Onion used to be really funny
>>7727023
Before they started shilling for Hillary.
>>7727372
Shillary
>>7727385
Got em' good there rusemiester. <3
>>7726756
I just looked up what an 'exit bag' was. Where can I buy one? I'm terrified if I use a gun something will go wrong and I will end up a retarded vegetable.
>>7723025
>be such a failure that you fuck up killing yourself
>y-yeah I t-totally want to live now...
>>7727452
Gun is the most effective. Shotgun in the mouth firing through the hindbrain (medulla, cerebellum, etc.) will turn the lights out pretty quickly.
But, you're not gonna do it. If you have to ask about this shit on the internet, then you're not serious.
>>7727452
HINT u won't die babe
>>7727525
Wow, you know what? You saying that just made me realize I'm not serious. Thank you oh wise one.
>>7727540
This kind of makes me want to an hero in the near future family.
>>7727540
Cutting your own throat is pretty hardcore.
>>7722581
PUTRID
>>7722780
To be serious, probably regret as he dangled from the rafters on the patio (pic related). I doubt, considering both his height and the fact that he used a belt, that he died instantly and was probably slowly strangled (he also duct taped his wrists together so he wouldn't be able to free himself. I remember reading about a suicide attempt that jump from the golden gate bridge. as soon as he vaulted over the railing-- instant regret and realization that he didn't want to die anymore. I imagine dave convulsing and kicking his feet at the chair he jumped from, wide eyed, thinking how much he loves his wife despite her irritating flaws and sub-Karr intellect, suddenly is incredibly embarrassed, and he wants to hurry up and free himself so his wife won't have to find his dead body, not to mention totally banal and self-concious suicide note. Realizing it's futile he relaxes and accepts his fate, this is it, it's over, nothing to worry about anymore. As he fades into the abyss he hears the muffled whining of his dog through the glass door, as if desperately speaking to him for the first time:
>noi discernible talent
>>7722581
>i hope a bunch of teenage shut-ins who listen to shitty music ironically turn my magnum opus into a meme
>>7722581
>this isn't water
The pale jest
Ya can't shit in the clinton
>>7727544
xoxo
>>7727540
Most people putting a plastic bag over the head aren't using an actual exit bag like the ones designed for medical use, so they actually feel like they're asphyxiating and try to get out.
A proper exit bag is ventilated with an inert gas so that carbon dioxide doesn't build up and trigger that asphyxiating feeling.
>>7727558
Gayle Jones' husband cut his throat on her doorstep, which I think ended her writing career.
ooh bloody hell mate, this here suicide is a right stinker. someone ought to call the coppers, guv
>>7727540
Why does it say "gunshot of" of what? Why, what?
>>7722780
yeah, it's sad and pretty morbid to think that even if he truly wanted to commit suicide he probably had an instinctual moment of panic and regret.
Why didn't I take a bottle of xanax ??
"David wept"
>>7722915
it just made me consider a more efficient way of doing it than hanging yourself
>>7728351
If you don't make it fast enough, you'll probably have time to think and to feel regret.
>>7722584
Godammit.
I can't even imagine why someone would ever kill themselves. Living is always better than dying. I experienced some truly horrible pain in my life, but even the thought of ending the one chance at life we get feels grotesque to me.
>>7722581
I wonder if I wrote enough footnotes in my suicide note.
>>7722714
Read Further Away by Franzen. Just the essay, not the whole book.
>>7722581
"So it goes."
>>7722709
They probably put it as "Más sin embargo".
"Ayy lmao"
>>7722780
>sub-Karr intellect
lmao
>>7729768
I have. I can't say I understand Franzen's reaction to Wallace's death; it seems short on empathy.
>>7722581
>welp, i'm outta bud.
help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help help
>>7730030
>Más sin embargo
>Más
please kill yourself
>>7722603
probably this
>>7729679
I can imagine it takes a certain level of religious thinking (even in the Deist or new-age masturbation-yoga-cross-fit/buddhism "smoke a joint" we're all joined in the singularity sense, where there is some great other besides this) and hitting an absolute rock bottom/failing some ideal in your life that can never be mended. Sprinkle some mental illness or irregularities and you might put the gun in your mouth and fold.
It's gruesome, and I've had some tough times in my life but've never thought of suicide. Irreparably removing the possibility, not just of things getting better, but of anything at all - is so terrifying and alien to my modern-man mind.
>>7727540
Ideal way is too mix and match, like cut your wrists vertically from your hand to your elbow and then hang yourself from a height.
Worst way (wife is an ER doc) is to drink acid. Terrible, terrible idea.
>>7732071
Isn't it more comfortable to suck a blotter of LSD and put on a helium mask?
Cuts hurt
>>7732082
I dunno, but the wife had a guy who drank hydrochloric acid and basically lived for 3 days in an ICU unit on a ventilator with brain function.
She also had an acetaminophen (Tylenol) suicide, which is actually horrifying as it gives you the option of surviving a little while with a failed liver or dying in a few days with a failed liver.
She mostly gets teen girls being dramatic who scratch the tops of their wrists with glass in silly gestures, or homeless people that give themselves self inflicted flesh wounds to come out of the cold.
>>7732095
>drank hydrochloric acid and basically lived for 3 days in an ICU unit on a ventilator with brain function
Like trying to kill yourself by setting your stomach on fire
What were his specific circumstances, if he could or wanted to speak? Is it your wife's job to talk them out of future attempts, or is there too much shame from the attempts when she receives them?
>>7722694
JUST DO IT
>>7732001
nice img. Saved.
>>7732071
from "My Twisted World"
To end my life, I will quickly swallow all of the Xanax and Vicodin pills I have left, along with an ample
amount of hard liquor. Immediately after imbibing this mixture, I will shoot myself in the head with two
of my handguns simultaneously. If the gunshots don’t kill me, the deadly drug mixture eventually will. I
will not suffer being captured and sent to prison.
desu this is pretty foolproof, any depressant and stimulant will do the trick and give you a painless death.
>>7722780
This is gay
>>7731341
I just meant about the part where he talks about Wallace wanting to justify his death by hurting someone close, that way he could prove (in hurting them) he didn't deserve their love, and therefore deserved to have the right to die.
But as far as your point you made, I think maybe that's how a writer should put such things. His opinion about why the death occurred rather how he feels about it. No one likes sentimentality. Plus, showing is better than telling, always. Talking about scattering his friend's ashes I think tells us that we don't need to read about his feelings, because we can already assume ourselves. That's often confused with poor writing, which in my opinion is far from the case. I've never been a fan of exposition. Had this been a longer essay, say book length, it may have been necessary. But this was perfect as it was.
>>7732633
your gay
>>7732163
>>7722780
>I remember reading about a suicide attempt that jump from the gold-
stopped reading there
>>7722999
Dubs dubs trips, nice.
>still believing in last thoughts
It doesn't end.
>>7722780
wait a second how do you duct tape your own wrists together?
>>7728351
Overdose on effective chemicals is the only patrician method. Get a pdf of peaceful pill handbook and drop the 2k for nembutal from some weird chinese factory, other than that you can always take about 15x the ld50 of fentanyl and be guaranteed a painless demise. Honestly, a gun shot would probably be okay,
I just don't want to use a method, assuming I can't improve my life, where I feel deep regret and fear once over the event horizon. That's why opiates are the way to go, imo.
>>7727540
>explosives
TAKBIR
>>7722999
I was just looking at them when you called
>>7736795
He's pretty dead m8.
>>7736819
How do you know it'll be painless?
>>7739929
you can test a bit of the drug and it puts you to sleep without pain
>>7736816
Pretty easily, if you're not a moron.
>>7722613
this is the only post the thread needed
o
