How do I stop being pretentious? Apparently it comes off as such in my writing and my personality and I don't know why.
I'm not even that well read
>>7499765
Talk less, be silent, appear mysterious. Speak only if you are of superior knowledge in a given field. Deplete your dopamine so you look like an over-worked sage (so either sex, drugs or sth). Try not to spill spaghetti.
>>7499765
be cruel as fuck. talk down to them so hard that they don't know what hit them. approach their sensibilities and ruin them. people who say you're pretentious probably just don't fucking get it. fuck them. who do you write for anyway? you write for those losers who think that you have some sort of animosity towards those who might not agree, understand, or identify with you? fuck em. write in whatever way that's comfortable for you. polishing is fine, honing your skill is fine, but changing your entire style because some few don't like a few sneers? you have to draw the line of how far you're willing to go to change yourself for others. you might lose whatever voice you had in the process.
Self-deprecating humour
>>7499765
It takes talent and status to be pretentious, both of which you lack.
>>7499873
This, or at least, don't take yourself serious and let people know that you don't
>>7499821
Marcus Aurelius would think you are foolish to think you can appear wise by saying nothing.
>>7499909
marcus aurelius was a batty boy
>>7499917
and a heroin addict
>>7499765
>I'm not even that well read
There you go
>>7499921
It really kills the spirit of stoicism when you realize he was a poppy-fiend.
Being stoic is easy as shit when you're high on opiates.
"Could you repeat the question?"
"Maybe I misunderstood, did you mean..."
"I like your face, you have a pretty smile."
Just memorize these three lines, then always open and end your conversations with them, nod a lot and try to make eye contact with the person speaking to you.
If they are saying something funny, I visualize them taking a shit, that usually works.
example, meeting a mutual friend for the first time:
>F: Hey Anon, this is Alex, we went to high school together, she studies Business Law.
>A: Hi Alex, could you repeat the question?
>A: Hi, what question was that?
>A: Maybe I misunderstood, did you mean ...?
>A: *looks away awkwardly*
>F: *stares at you*
>A: "I like your face, you have a pretty smile."
>A: "Oh, thank you! Let's grab a coffee and talk about topics."
>A: *imagine Alex naked taking a shit, she has large nipples in my imagination*
>A: "Hahaha!"
>A: "Hehehe!"
>F: "See I told you Anon was cool."
>A: *it worked!*
>>7499931
His wife was cute though.
>>7499955
back 2 reddit
>7499990 (Me)
is this like an upvote, it gave me a (You)
edit: Woah now it gave me a Me, is this like 4chan gold? thanks guys I'm so happy.
@7499995
Could you repeat the question?
>>7499765
>I'm not even that well read
That's the problem. Pretentious people aren't well read.
>>7499995(me)I secretly gifted you 4chin gold for xmas anon ;) ;)
>>7499765
Go out of your way not to use big words or sentence fillers.
>>7500005
So you're not well read?
>>7500022
nobody on /lit/ is well read causenobody here reads
>>7500023
There are maybe four people here who read.
>>7500023
Not him, but I read all the time. In fact I barely come to /lit/ anymore, partly because I read a lot and partly because this place is a shadow of it's former self.
>>7500022
You thought this was funny.
Just look at yourself honestly. Do you do things to pretend to be smart? That's really all you need to do. Try not to be self-loathing or narcissistic, just objective.
Smart people get called pretentious all the time because of ressentiment. But so do actual pretentious people.
>>7500036
Yes, I did. And it is. It's not very clever, but it's funny.
>>7500034
>I'm one of them.
I'm another.
We're closer and closer to solving this amazing mystery.
>>7499765
You actually reach the level of culture you are pretending to have.
You actually reach the level of talent you are pretending to have.
for quick fixes: stop insulting the pop BS stuff your friends like, stop wearing a scarf and smoking cigs, stop suckin so many dicks
Just stop
>>7500378
>stop insulting the pop BS stuff your friends like
But its so hard when they play the new Taylor Swift song literally 30 times in a row
>>7501214
holy shit this thread just reminded me i could be listening to music when i shitpost, sweeet
>>7501214
>implying Taylor Swift isn't great
>>7499765
>How do I stop being pretentious?
It's easy. Stop trying to be someone you're not
>>7501256
brah im listening to shit so patrish it's not even on /mu/ u cant fuck wit me my nig
>>7499931
he used it but it by no means meant he was a fiend.
>>7499765
Let me project some, anon. I think people usually became pretentious because they are insecure. They don't think they are a worthwhile person, so they try to show that they're a bit better than they seem, a bit smarter, a bit more profound.
Insecurity like that isn't easy to treat. I'll have to come to terms with who you are and how other people see and stop using stilts to increase your self-worth.
>>7500378
I do neither of those things but feel constantly infuriated by being forced to work for chicken-scratch in this mechanized void of suffering we call the 'state'. Even as I go to college, I realize my struggle will be in vain, as there's virtually no hope for the long-term existence of humanity based on the median intelligence of consumers and exploited workers. Even the JSW's, the special class of infantile bratty elitism, who do the good work of 'proper morality', are starting to make me so heinously cynical about the quota of education in the United States and how low the mark is for critical thought.
Does it make me pretentious that I work in a restaurant, clearing tables, paying my expenses, while going to college, only to have nothing left at the end of the month, next to nothing in savings, and live in complete isolation because all of my passions are not in any likeness to those of whom I'm immediately acquainted with? I could move, but that risks joblessness and is so insecure. I've been homeless before. I don't want to do that again. So, less, I'm trapped for the next two years, until I turned twenty-four, and can finally apply for some adequate goddamn funding to attend a university.
Did I also mention I have no high school diploma and bipolar disorder? I dropped out at sixteen because I had to be institutionalized multiple times and was never able to attend consistently after. How is that for stigmatizing? I might be bisexual also. It's great, juggling all these contentious standards that were just given to me by life.
I've seen friends strung out on dope and crystal; I have relatives that no nothing more than a trailer for a home; I've had my own addictions. Pretty much every facet of American life has touched me in some way, I could write a goddamn novel. But while I'm studying to write that novel, I have to sell myself and my esteem to some fucking jerk-off four star establishment to make a decent wage (and I'm actually sort of grateful that it's not any lower); so, please, just allow me the satisfaction of shitting and ripping on shallow people and their pop-influences. I don't care if it makes me lonely.
>>7501273
how could i try to be someone im not when i dont even know who i am
>>7501587
>I don't care if it makes me lonely
>writes a wall of text on a cambodian rice sculpture board about it
stop lying
>>7499931
was about to excited read his shit until i read this
>>7500378
>You actually reach the level of culture you are pretending to have.
What do I do if I don't know if I have the level of culture I think I have?
>>7501587
You are the sum product of your experiences and your decisions. However, you are under the mistaken assumption that you must have a scandalously expensive and time consuming degree from some pretentious, self absorbing university to be a success in life.
This is only because of your recent programming and propaganda. There are millions of ways to make money without a degree that do not involve serving food to other people.
Here is an idea right here.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/speaking-of-science/wp/2015/01/29/you-can-earn-13000-a-year-selling-your-poop/
Takes very little talent and apparently the main consideration is that you be young and healthy enough to produce good gut flora that can help others. This could supplement your income while you write the next great American novel. Write what you know and it seems you have had enough shit happen to you to write a great novel.
Good luck anon.
>>7501587
Its actually interesting. What person has for working most of his week, 8- hours per day? He could things and more things, but what if he dont want these things?? There is like few thousands years of progress, but society still cant provide one decent reason for peoples to try and have ambition. Why do i need to stand early at the morning, what for? Its ridiculous
>>7501587
not memeing or shilling spooks, but I was having a rough go at it experiencing similar disillusionment/hopelessness a few months ago, in college but having to make sandwiches for faggots, smarter than most folks but hardly able to hold a normal conversation with anybody (largely because I was silently judging them and wrestling with the feeling that if I pretend they aren't ignorant/stupid/wrong/whatever I am being inauthentic to who I am—god forbid), etc. eventually I began openly conducting myself as a sperg asshole, which garnered me many customer complaints, and if I was too smart for the job, then how dumb would I be to lose it, I have bills to pay.
if every facet of American life has touched you, then it should show in your ability to relate to anybody and be a decent person. this is the capacity I have realized in myself over the last few months. knowing something is one thing, truly realizing it is another, etc.
what works for me: fully committing to everything I do/say; being open and honest, within reason; stop caring what I look like when doing/saying something or worrying about how other folks see me (hardest one).
remember that you are the same piece of shit as everybody else. help however you can with what you can.
>>7499765
fuck those cucks, be true to yourself negro
>>7501273
What if trying to be someone who he is not is a part of being who he is?
I've known one genius in my life. I'm grateful to say he's a good friend, and also very happy to report that he's one of the least pretentious persons I've met, even while having the highest warrant to be so. Here's the trick: Perceive, but hold the judgement. You can objectively compare yourself to others–however you may like–and even hold a high standard for those you care to associate yourself with. But–and this is for the sake of your own happiness–never apply any egotistically derived or emotionally influenced judgements to those others you might happen to perceive as being inferior (or, 'different,' to use a more forgiving term). It will make you jaded, give you a superiority complex, and ultimately create around you a circumference of bitter repulsion.
Nobody is inherently better than anyone else (fucking debate me e/lit/ist faggots), people are just suited for different things in life. Not everyone can belong to your country's cognoscenti in the same way not everyone can trim hedges for a living–the Calvinist were right in a certain capacity: predestination is providence is destiny; free will is as illusory as the Houdini's left nut. Understand this, and your happiness and charisma will compound like fifty-five year old interest (as wisdom tends to).
>>7499931
But opiates are the most patrician drug [imo].
I'd love nothing more than my dog, a cool girlfriend, comfy library, home theater, and countless bottles of oxycodone. 'Tis much to ask, and for this I recognize my quixotic spoils, but good lord that would be nice.
Don't judge me; or, enlighten me as to why opiates are but a path to hell, 'cuz I've done heard as such–from people who don't know how to moderate their drug usage–once every three days is the rule!!!
>>7501587
You remind me so much of my friend (who also had bi-polar disorder) that it's scary.
Just listen, man: you can snootily, snottily snub-nose folks all you want; in fact, you can even do it in a charismatic, palpable way (think: Buckley), but that style of personality I believe is innate, and so often futile. Yet, if you actually want to make friends and connect with people on a deeper level, then you can't have it both ways. Either learn to temper your temperament, or swoon in your solitude. But, judging from your posts, I'd say you in dire need company.
>>7505737
>the Calvinist were right
just one clue that your entire post was garbage
>>7499955
Somebody please try this recipe for autism and greentext the results
>>7505737
Bad posting
Pseudo modesty at its finest
>>7505777
I should have been more careful in my phrasing. I don't espouse any Calvinist dogma, nor any religious dogma for that matter. All I implied was that our lives are inevitable. It isn't a particular deep sentiment by any means, but nobody chooses to be who they are, where they grow-up, how their races, etc. etc. Some are sanctioned to hell on earth (such are the laws of life), while others elysium. Therefore there's no bloody point to condemn or censure another for things outside of their power. However, being pretentious, compulsive vituperation, putting on sesquipedalian airs: these are all character traits and behavioral patterns that, once consciously addressed, can absolutely be mended.
The argument that free will doesn't exist and that everything is inevitable therefore immutable, like many of OP's comments have suggested, is a shit excuse for making the active decision to not better yourself as a person. Bullshit, for the lack.
>>7505818
And I actually agree with you (which further reinforces your claim to my pseudo-modesty, which I'm totally cool with).
Fake it till you make it–!
>>7499931
>God damn it sucks to realize pynchon and DFW and all those post-globalization 'writers' were just on sugar-and-alcohol diets the entire time...
>>7505754
> Limits opiate use to twice a week
> Limits
>>7505931
Are you saying that limits aren't possible with opiates, or that twice a week is hardly a limit?
Both are basically true.
>>7505593
>society still cant provide one decent reason for peoples to try and have ambition
Dude just because you want financial security doesn't mean you're some materialistic, ostentatious, wealth-hoarding fuckboy. It's not that hard to find a job that can support you when things are good. The problem is that when things go wrong - really anything, you lose your job, health problems, natural disaster, car blows a tire, whatever - you're totally fucked. You need to have a buffer built up for that eventuality.
Also most people have other people that they care about and want the very best for. It's not all about you personally.
And finally, whether you like it or not, money and other forms of success give you clout. I don't want people to fuck with me with impunity.
>>7505606
Glad to hear that you have seen the light anon.
People who talk about being "authentic to their true selves" are usually fucking losers. There is basically nothing about my "self" that I am so attached to that I have to express it even when it has nothing but negative consequences in my life.
>>7501282
Title, please.
