Your mom walks in and asks what book you're reading and what it's about.
So, /lit. How do describe the book you're reading?
>Naked Lunch
>ugh...a murdering pedophile rapes and kills little boys for 200 pages
>God's truth
>Ave Maria, ok?
>Swann's Way
>a guy lies in a bed and swoons over his long lost time for 400 pages
The Iliad
>you haven't read it? Pleb.
>my diary desu
>ugh...a murdering pedophile rapes and kills little boys for 200 pages
>>7471298
Way to completely misunderstand what you're readijng you fucking retard.
A Confederacy of Dunces. It's about me you leftist bitch.
>>7471308
>its so deep man
No. It's a faggot junky writing about sexual fantasies of breaking kids necks while fucking them in the ass
>>7471298
>Bhagavad Gita
>aight, there's this charioteer who's actually Krishna and he talks to some guy about the good life for 600 verses in a battlefield and no one interrupts him.
>>7471306
...so you haven't read it either...
>implying that my mom isn't cool
>>7471317
Foreal though...there's not that much to it.
>"Hey, so buddy...what's up?"
>"Oh...raping...pillaging."
>"Yeah? Do you have time for Kirshna's word?"
>"I suppose I've got a minute."
>It's called Sex and Punishment, and for the most part it's pretty interesting. There's an obvious slant in the writing because the guy who wrote it's a homo, but beyond that it's really illuminating learning about how different cultures handled sex and deviance. The book goes chronologically and it had a whole chapter about the Jew's rules from the book of Leviticus.
>Sounds good. Do you want me to heat up some food?
>Yeah, that'd be great. Not in the microwave though, please.
>I know.
>Thanks mom. Love you.
>I love you too. You're so smart anon. I thank God for you and your brother everyday.
>>7471335
It's a bretty gud book but I just love how Arjuna and Krishna are just talking about shit in the middle of the 2 armies and no one gives a fuck.
>War and Peace
>Fuck if I know
>I'm about 400 pages in and now only beginning to grasp who is who
>Mom what are you doing in my room anyway
>I thought you were at a Christmas party
>Sabbath's Theater
>It's about old, disgusting people having lots of sex. Sometimes it tries to be funny or poignant but it's just boring through and through. It's trash.
>>7471369
>I came home because I *falls drunkenly against the door* realized I missed you
>oh...mom..okay..
>you look so much like your dad did at that age...except smaller and weaker...
>th..thanks..
>can I just hold you...I want you to hold me too
>mom...I
>shhh senpai...someone needs to make you a man
>>7471320
>it's impossible to read things more than once
>>7471403
So you 'read it', but you didn't understand it. That's worse than not having read it at all.
>Nightwood
>It's hugely progressive 1920's novel written by a women named Djuna Barnes about a hetero-lesbian love quadrangle involving a baron named Felix, a flaky whore named Robin, an empty human-shell named Jenny, and an overly emotional and needy heartthrob named Nora. There's also a tranny doctor who incessantly waxes poetic about life, love, and most importantly, death–God's mistress. It's pretty good Mom, though because you presume to be 100% straight, I don't think you'll like it...prude.
>Crime and Punishment
>Some dude kills an old woman for money but wusses out and doesn't use it.
>Also it tries to do that noble prostitute thing.
> The surprises and complications of plot are glorified clichés.
>I dislike it intensely.
>"Haven't you already read it? Like really recently?"
>Moooom! You can't judge book after the first read! Why do you have to be so pleb?
>>7471431
>Nightwood
>Every second paragraph is good
>>7471431
>tumblr
>the post
>>7471431
>It's pretty good Mom, though because you presume to be 100% straight, I don't think you'll like it...prude.
When will this war against straight people end?
>>7471345
All happy families are more or less dissimilar. All unhappy ones are more or less alike.
>Lectures on the History of Philosophy
>tfw mom asks 'what is philosophy is for'
>>7471298
My mom doesn't walk in because she's with my dad in Africa doing some humanitarian aid thing. Meanwhile I'm here in this New York penthouse all by myself.
>>7471483
>Meanwhile I'm here in this New York penthouse all by myself.
lying is a sin, anon.
>>7471475
Well?
>>7471497
philosophy is power.
>>7471497
To feel like he is being educated even though he never went to college
>>7471507
>implying you get properly educated at college these days
There exceptions of course but it's mostly about getting a degree and then being pushed into 9 to 5 job.
>>7471443
No likey?
>>7471448
I've been called stupid, arrogant, obnoxious, unfunny, faggot, even redditor, and yet, this has to be the worst insult I've ever gotten on this board. Nice, love firsts.
>>7471455
Tbh, I'm quite annoyed by it too, despite my first posts implicacions. I just think that the constantly forced notion that gender is fluid in EVERYBODY is people with homosexual tendency's cognitively dissonant way of justifying their own sexuality in a socially permissible way. Nobody wants to be the outlier (usually), and so suggesting that everyone else is like you puts said people at ease with themselves.
That being said, I don't mind what people do with in their own privacy, and also think that labeling yourself as gender/sexual/etc. anything tends to set up unrealistic constraints in people's behavior and perceptions towards one another, creating unrealistic expectations, just like having homoerotic experiences like: c'mon, you can't knock it till you try it.–Well, I haven't tried cross fit, but I'm going to knock it anyway.
>>7471523
>Tbh, I'm quite annoyed by it too, despite my first posts implicacions. I just think that the constantly forced notion that gender is fluid in EVERYBODY is people with homosexual tendency's cognitively dissonant way of justifying their own sexuality in a socially permissible way. Nobody wants to be the outlier (usually), and so suggesting that everyone else is like you puts said people at ease with themselves.
>That being said, I don't mind what people do with in their own privacy, and also think that labeling yourself as gender/sexual/etc. anything tends to set up unrealistic constraints in people's behavior and perceptions towards one another, creating unrealistic expectations, just like having homoerotic experiences like: c'mon, you can't knock it till you try it.–Well, I haven't tried cross fit, but I'm going to knock it anyway.
>tumblr
>the sequel to the post
>>7471515
Spoken as by a boy who pretends to know things because then he can make excuses for having to do anything worthwhile
>>7471551
>Spoken as by a boy who pretends to know things because then he can make excuses for having to do anything worthwhile
translation:
>f-fuck you! my expensive,useless liberal arts degree wasn't for nothing you CRETIN, I'm a CREATOR.
>>7471551
Hmm, greentext followed by a meme-status insult. Why do you feel the need to put others down with content you've stolen, anon? Is it because you have trouble thinking for yourself, or because a lifetime lack of proper appreciation and affection has left a void in you so deep that the only thing you manage to fill it with, if only a little, is the irksome patter of others' forlorn hearts? What I'm trying to say, friend, is: look down at your lap, unzip your pants, pull out your ole Ticonderoga #2, and commence staring at what you literally are.
>>7471575
>And he continues to prove my point.
I'm not that anon, you just sound like a massive tool 2bh.
Was reading Lolita in the army
>hey anon whatchu reading them books there?
>uuh..Lolita
>Is that some pedo shit?
>uhm..yeah but it's like also a love story
>>7471315
>It's so deep man
Nice strawman. I don't even like Burroughs, but your reading is plainly wrong, in fact, it leads me to believe you aren't actually reading it.
>Meanwhile I'm here in this New York penthouse all by myself
can I come live with you?
>>7471578
>stop making fun of me for being a failure
>im self diagnosed with OCD, ADHD, Depression, Transgender Identity Crises, and Multiple Personality Disorder. Trust me. My Myspace quiz told me all of it and people totally agree with me on tumblr about it
The Recognitions
Mummys
>>7471630
>reading philosophy without going to college equals being a Tumblr attentionwhore
stop trying famalan
>>7471298
That's like saying the bible is about a fig tree that doesn't grow figs so jesus curses it, start that book again from the beginning please
>tfw your mum told you to read naked lunch when you were 15
>>7471637
It's worse actually.
>Savage Detectives
>It's About some degenerate mexican teenagers having orgies and selling weed while posing as poets
>o-okay son
A confederacy of dunces
>oh my GAUD, mother please refrain from disturbing me while I articulate my worldview! Begone!
>V
Something about a gearshift resembling a penis
>The Orchid Eaters
>It's about a gang of born again bikers and a rival gang of martial-art practising homosexual drug dealers teaming up to defeat a eunuch serial killer who's collecting ghosts of teenage boys by castrating then murdering them.
I thought it was going to be a proto Half-Life story because it's by the guy who wrote HL1 but I think I had a major brain fart between discovering it existed and buying it.
>>7471515
Please tell me all about what the purpose of my degree was, and how much more you know about real life because you work 50 hrs a week on a constantly changing schedule for 50 cents above federal minimum wage.
Handjobs, Ireland, Greek poetry, jews
>>7471870
you'd probly be too busy gurgling and trying to get yr vent unclogged.
>>7472513
>vent
What translation did you read senpai?
>>7471389
>New American Short Stories
>It's a collection of contemporary American short fiction, mom.
>>7471462
What?
>>7471423
What are you even saying?
You've never read a book you like more than once?
>>7473686
Keked sensibly.
>>7471298
mfw my mom died last year, and will never again walk in and ask me what book I'm reading and what it's about.
>>7473711
If you truly liked it you would only need to read it once to understand it.
>>7471389
Kek'd heartily.
>>7471298
'Submission'
It is about the loss of will and identity in the West as vigorous Catholic Monarchy was replaced with spineless Liberal Democracy
>>7471483
I loved that book
>>7471596
Somewhere I have a picture from Desert Shield of my LT, platoon sergeant, and me reading, in order, Naked Lunch, Lolita, and Wide Sargasso Sea
