I feel like the easy access to porn conditioned my homosexual tendencies. While I was a horny 10-year-old, anything I did which I knew was "wrong" gave me a rush and made my dick shoot straight up. My parents were the type to flip the fuck out and turn off the tv if a sex scene popped up, so obviously seeking exactly what my parents banned me from viewing was a turn-on in itself. In fact, anything that I knew would be considered "wrong," like cheating on a test or stripping myself naked when no one was watching, would excite me. I remember watching Family Guy (which was a heavily banned show in my house) while my parents were away, and getting a sexual thrill out of it solely because I wasn't supposed to be doing it.
Now, how I came to like gay videos is another question. I believe there's a certain window of time dedicated for maturing your sexual urges.
Now, for normally developed cis straight guys in middle school, they quickly learn from each other to appreciate girls. This is enforced through team activities like sports, where tons of social interaction and trust develop between guys both on the playing field and in the locker room.
However, those outside of this crucial developmental environment are more susceptible to not learning this. The social repercussions of internalized homosexual tendencies are far greater on a team than if you were in your own little world.
I, for one, was not heavily involved with sports, and was still in the prepubescent "girls have cooties" mentality. I never had such trust-based social environments to cultivate and mature my sexual interests, and so I continuously strayed from girls.
So this, along with the oppositional mentality of getting a thrill out of doing anything "wrong," reinforced my homosexual tendencies. Even though I wasn't involved with sports, I learned by then that boys were supposed to like girls. But without that social reinforcement through sports, I found myself pursuing the thrill of watching gay porn.
So because of this, I turned into a closeted homo. However, I believe sexuality is fluid and a learned trait. I say this because I have recently been conditioning myself to become straight again. To do this, I've watched solely straight and lesbian porn, and webcam girls in particular. I'm at the point now where thinking about big-breasted women and perky nipples nearly give me a hard on.
Homosexuality is the result of an incomplete upbringing. And I will fight to overcome and unlearn these tendencies myself.
Any similar experiences or thoughts?
>heterosexuality is a social construct invented by jocks when the football and primary and secondary education was invented
>>6564688
You need to think back to before that. Humans developed in similar ways back when all we had were sticks and fire.
They all stuck together in a tribe. For the sake of survival, it was important to be socially accepted in that tribe. Homosexual tendencies would flat out be destroyed in this context.
>>6564728
>Homosexual tendencies would flat out be destroyed in this context.
Three problems with this: citation needed; homophobia IS taught NOT homosexuality or heterosexuality; and you don't see many other animals ostracizing homosexual couplings. People learn that gay is equivalent to bad even before learning what the fuck gay is.
You can do whatever you want to yourself, but there is objectively nothing wrong with homosexuality.
>>6564728
Are we talking hunting and gathering days?
Because I kind of imagine ancient men would fuck anything with a wet hole. Out on a hunting party a buddies butthole would seem like a decent place to vent frustration.
I feel homophobia probably came into being when men became cognitively aware enough to understand thinking with your dick makes you a easily manipulated animal. (Eastern religion)
I'd like to think it was neurotic hypochondria based around the uncleaness of the butthole but a lot of cultures who were obsessed with their understanding of cleanliness were notorious buttfuckers. (Western religion)
Maybe the uncleanliness meme came from a dood who wanted his men to stop "fucking around" and get to work?
Maybe it's a rumour a jealous woman started thousands of years ago?
Maybe homophobic ideals hit it big when the Roman Reich fell and subsiquenty became Christian.
>>6564883
You're probably almost right. Tribal societies were most likely orgiastic and viewed sex as a rite or form of magic. There probably were no my child and your child but our children.
Once a month they took some form of psychedelic (psilocybin) and just had one big orgy were everyone fucked everyone.
When tribes stopped being nomadic and we became cultivators we started noticing stuff like which child was mine.
From this it is easy to imagine how orientations have survived in the form of a collective consciousness spanning fetishes and fertility.
