Help me LGBT. I'm not gay. I've never seen myself as gay. I've been with my share of women. I love women. I love their skin, the way they move, the way they smell. I want to hold them and keep them safe.
But I want to get railed.
I will...masturbate face down, and imagine I have some hunky guy on top of me, and he's making me his bitch. And I love it. I cry and squirm but he's making me his bitch. I hate this. I hate this fantasy.
I've gone so far as to getting on Alt and seeking a mistress to peg me, but that species seems rare in my part of the world. (I dunno.)
I don't want to go on Grindr. I don't want to kiss men. I don't want gay men looking me in the eyes. I don't love men. I....just want to get railed and feel like a bitch. What do I do? What is wrong with me?
You're bisexual. Why do you care so much?
>>6311189
because I love the feeling, but I don't love the person.
Too much porn maybe?
>>6310977
Hey man, don't worry, I've been in your position before.
First, know that you're in control of who you sleep with and what you do with them. Some of the stereotypes around gay guys, the idea that people can repress their true selves for years, stories about married guys getting caught having gay affairs, etc... make it seem like sexuality is some monster that will eventually take control of you if you don't feed it. But that's not reality. You decide what you do. If you never want to have sex with men in your life, that's your choice. Even if you found out you were 100% gay (and I doubt you are), you could still choose to just never have sex with men. You'd probably just be happier acting on your desires at that point, but it would still be up to you to do it or not.
Second, fantasy is often a poor guide to what we want in reality. I get off to all sorts of extreme fantasies, women cutting my balls off, selling me into slavery, forcing me to wear diapers all the time, etc. Does that mean I want to actually do all those things? Am I "repressing my true self" by not acting on my fantasies? No, of course not, that would be absurd. Your fantasies about men might be similar. It does sound like you're actively looking for someone to fuck you though, so I wish you luck with that.
Also, if you ever do want to fuck men, stay off Grindr. That's like a woman saying "I want to experiment with girls" and then going to a cheap hooker.
Also you might just be bisexual.
>>6311219
That is a possibility that goes through my mind.
>>6311268
A thoughtful answer. Thanks much.
>>6311268
Actual good advice on /lgbt/
End times
END TIMES
(will add tho: "bisexual" isn't all-in either. I consider myself bi but I've no interest in men at all beyond cock. Actively dislike most of them in fact, but still love that fuckin' an' suckin'. It's fine)
>>6311268
Uh, how can you compare using Grindr to meet somebdoy to hiring a prostitute. The fuck?
>>6311733
Sorry, I've never even used Grindr. I guess that comparison might be offensive to some people who have had good experiences with it. My only knowledge comes from the sleazy profiles and stories that people share. I do think it's good advice that if you're going to experiment for the first time, it's better to do it with someone you trust rather than a stranger.
>>6310977
Just let a girl peg you.
Doing anal isn't gay if it's not a dude.
>>6310977
Just go out find a big burly guy and have him fuck your brains out, faggot.
You'll figure out if you actually like it or if it's just a fantasy thing.
>>6312679
Delivery aside, this is actually good advice (provided you do it sensibly). Worst case scenario: you tried a thing and didn't like it and could then forget about it for the rest of your life. If you think you might like olives, do you spend your entire life agonising over whether eating a single olive will irrevocably turn you into an olive eater, or do you just fuckin' try one and see what it's like?
thanks for the advice, everyone.
>>6313025
Yeah, maybe. I don't want to disappoint gay men with my unwillingness to....I dunno, connect? Sniff their pits? toss their salad? I honestly doubt I could get an erection for them either. It's like I'm looking for an emotional penetration as well, but I don't know enough about gay men to gauge what they want to "deliver", other than just suggesting they top me with no recip. Is that a turn-off?
>>6313348
>top me with no recip. Is that a turn-off?
That's like 60% of gay hookup sites. No lie. Take proper precautions, do your best to find the least dickheaded guy (unfortunately almost all guys are total dickheads, but some are tolerable for long enough to get some) and go for it.
>>6313857
Thanks. Any sites or apps you'd recommend?
>>6313900
Not in here where any dickhead can come in and ruin them. Talking about good sex or dating sites is the beginning of the end.
Which country are you based in, OP?
>>6310977
OP, what you might have is a autogynephilic bisexuality. You want to be penetrated by a man to make you feel like the woman you are. Your not actually attracted to men.
Whats funny is that AGP people tend to work their way towards this through crossdressing/emulation of feminity, rather than starting out being fucked like a woman.
>>6313857
Very strange, this suggests to me that theres alot of bi guys who aren't really bi but feel the need to be penetrated.
ur a fag
>>6313348
I've fucked a few bi guys like this. It goes just fine. I don't suck dick or get fucked. "Straight " guys with girlfriends seems to be the group that's really into me for some reason
>>6317223
>AGP
This is interesting. I'll read up on this.
>crossdressing
There's a little of that in my life.
>feel like the woman you are
I've never identified as such. I don't want to live the life of a woman (too much work, and I'm not that social) but I honestly believe there is some switch in my brain that longs to be overwhelmed by someone else's sexuality. Maybe I didnt' get enough attention as an infant or something. I want to lose control, if only for a few minutes.
>>6310977
>I love their skin
Do you wear it too?
>>6317223
What's strange about disliking men but liking cock? Most straight men hate women but love cunt, and nobody bats an eye. At least OP is starting on the path to self-awareness about it.
>>6318293
Hmmmm a very good point! And OP doesn't even dislike men as people, hes just not attracted to their smell/bodies.
>>6311268
In addition to what this person said, fantasy is just fantasy. You have no more control over it than your taste in food, and it should cause you no more guilt than that either. You wouldn't beat yourself up for liking spicy food, right?
Men have prostates so you have a super duper pleasure center built into your body and add to that an inverted power dynamic and a taboo element- things which turn on people of all genders and orientations- can make for a pretty tantalizing idea. You're definitely not alone in this fantasy, nor are you alone in being a guy who loves everything about women "but" still has this fantasy (they are not mutually exclusive).
If you want to find a girl to peg you, that's fine. If you want to find a guy for one-time S&M, that's fine. Honestly, with talk like "what is wrong with me," there is not exactly going to be a line of gay men wanting to tenderly look you in the eyes so no worries there.
Re bisexuality, it's not always a "yes" or "no" scenario. Bisexuality is spectrum, and you might be on the 1% gay side of it in which case it's debatable how bi that really is. What does it even matter? "I jack off to thoughts of getting railed by Ken" isn't an orientation. You're exempt from marching in the parade.
I know it's easier said than done but don't worry, live your life, this isn't anything to get worked up over. Let go of your idea of "THIS IS WHO I AM AND THESE ARE MY ATTRIBUTES" and it'll be easier.
>>6310977
>I will...masturbate face down, and imagine I have some hunky guy on top of me, and he's making me his bitch.
> I'm not gay.
>>6318468
Thanks for your answer. I will ponder this.
>>6318469
> out of context greentext
>>6319270
For sure. Hope you find some piece of mind with this and are able to pursue whatever makes you happy. <3
>What is wrong with me?
Nothing. Literally not a single thing.
>>6310977
Gay men are horrible, gay men with their gay smiles and their gay smirks and their increased libido and higher rate of aids
