This is the Trans Help General thread. We'll try to help you here with everything related to being transgender.
This includes questioning, appearance, daily trans problems, medical info, general info and other interesting stuff to name a few.
MTF, FTM and questioning people are all welcome here to help eachother and discuss possible solutions.
You can also share your transgender related stories here. Just came out? Or you just need to get something off your chest?
Maybe something wonderful happened today! We'll be glad to hear it, it's always good to know we're not going through this alone.
Links:
Articles, Studies and General information about Questioning, Transitioning and other stuff: http://pastebin.com/CyW1dXV8
Lots of useful links about/for transgender people: http://pastebin.com/h1vLPxyV
Transgender FAQ: http://pastebin.com/8QbKyShU
Am i trans/ trans help threads archive:
http://archive.loveisover.me/lgbt/search/text/trans%20help%20general%20%23/username/annicole/type/op/
Therapists: http://www.t-vox.org/index.php?title=Therapists_by_region
http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/prof_search.php
sort by transsexual issues
What will hormones do?
mtf: http://imgur.com/lDBLSVR
ftm: http://imgur.com/HqTqvJg
Previous thread: >>5891114
Sometimes i feel like theyre right, that the only reason i dont want to be a man is because its too much work for a weakling such as myself
>>5910121
>because its too much work
How do you mean?
>>5910121
it's ten times the pain, the struggle and the hardships to be trans. don't let bullshit deceive you, 'choosing' to be trans to escape a life of difficulty is a ridiculous meme
>>5910121
Being trans is in no way a privilege worth desiring.
Is it possible to argue plastic surgery as a medical/mental necessity for transgender people, rather than cosmetic?
>>5910121
It is a lot of work pretending to be a man, but I'm sure a lot of trans men would agree that it's a lot of work pretending to be a woman.
>>5910312
Some insurance companies will cover ffs, apparently.
I'm curious myself if a provider in my country would ever cover surgery in another country since, like most people, I want whoever's best and not whoever's closest.
>>5910131
It takes intense energy to be a man. work work work.. you can never take a break if you want to make something out of life. you need to be more accomplished than the next guy and that next guy isnt seeking help on 4chan for a gender crisis.
dont get me wrong, women work hard too but they arent expected to lead and assert themselves the way men are.
does it only feel this way because im weak? i lack the stamina to maintain this level of activity for much longer. ive never been able to compete..if it werent for society i wouldve been pruned by nature.
>>5910162
O im very aware. its more like im choosing not to be trans for that reason and its left me in a state of purgatory. the question i ask myself is why am i here, now. i should be focusing on anything else.
>>5910194
right why would i want to be trans. i dont. i dont want to be anything but a decent human being..but im too weak. the bar is set so high these days. being a man is too painful for weaklings.
>>5910368
Is it really pretending or are am i just too weak.
>>5910421
You need to answer that yourself.
Is hrt induced breast growth the same thing as gynecomastia? Why do guys with gyno have saggy breasts but transwomen's are full and perky (even when small)?
>tfw no war to distract me from this crippling desire to be a girl
Is there a war on? I feel there should be a war on?
>>5910682
there are more than enough wars, fag
join the french foreign legion and go get yourself exterminated
>>5910707
But not enough wars where I fight for the future of mankind
>>5910682
Get over yourself and just be a girl, even if you can't be the "best" girl.
Then go fight a meaningful war as a woman. You dolt.
>>5910883
But the aliens will laugh at me
>>5910892
The aliens will laugh at everyone. It will be a bloodbath and we are likely to lose, but even if we do it will have meant something.
>>5910906
NO ALIEN LAUGHS AT ME
I'm 6'3''
There really is no hope for me, is there?
Even if I were to pass with my face I'll still be way too tall
Who would even want a girl who's this tall?
rec suicide methods please
>>5911687
Well i have cis female cousins that are that tall... it's weird but it's not a deal breaker.
It's gonna suck, but keep away from heels and platforms and keep thin and you should be ok...
At least i hope so, i'm that tall too :/
>>5911740
maybe we really will make it
>>5911687
plenty of guys/girls like tall people, even if it's not a fetish, a lot of people just have an indifference to it. being tall is in no way a dealbreaker
>>5911687
As you know you are very tall
But how's the rest of your figure?
Everyone has problems but we all have potential to be happy with our bodies cis or trans alike. It depends on your mindset. It's not something you fucking kill yourself over.
I myself have desirable feminine traits but cursed with wide collarbones that make me manly. No one not even cis get it all. You can and should still work to pass, face>everything else combined.
>>5911687
You can pass at any height, and there are plenty of people that dig tall girls. You will, however, command attention wherever you go.
It's mostly a personal thing desu. I'm tall too and my problem isn't passing, it's learning not to despise being a fucking monstrous lighthouse and wanting to off myself.
I uploaded an image the last thread, but it was blurry.
imgur com/SN80TWr
Could I eventually make it? Do I only need hair removal or FFS will be necessary?
I've been battling with a desire to be a girl for years, I was able to suppress it for a while, thinking that it was stupid. But, now it is back and I'm so confused :(. I don't know if I'm making this stuff up. I have hated puberty, it is disgusting to begin growing hairs and I wish everything wouldn't change. I hate shaving my face, but I hate the feeling of hair there even more. I told my friend about it who was completely supportive, and she asked whether I've seen anyone else's story. I hadn't, but after watching several MtF stories and after watching the Danish Girl, I related to everything and I broke out in tears. Then I watched an FtM story and I cried more, because they described their childhood as a girl, and I realised I have missed out on so much. I couldn't stop crying, and it was so hard. I feel great wearing a dress and I've started just wearing a bra during the day. It's weird because it feels right. So, while everything feels great, I'm so scared. I can get lost in pretending to be a girl, but in reality, I'm a guy, and I have no idea what that means for the future. I'm so happy my friend is there to support me, but I feel more lost now that I've tried to accept the feeling of wanting to be a girl. I really just wish I was normal in a way. Dad walked in on me trying a dress last week and he was so mad at me, he wants to talk to me tomorrow about it and I can't take my mind off of it.
I don't know what to tell him. I don't want to be transgender, but I love the idea of being a girl. I used to pray that I would wake up as a girl the next day. Do I just say that I'm confused? What do people normally do in this situation? I'm just breaking down and crying, I want to be born a girl and start again. Suicide feels like such an easy way out, but I can't do that to my friends. I wouldn't be able to transition for many years either. How do I accept what I'm going through? How do I come to a conclusion to whether I'm male or female? It hurts not knowing.
>>5912978
The feeling of making it up seems to be common amongst many people coming to terms with it at first, and im feeling it too, really bad, but i can tell you that I think i may be trans, and your experience is far far more valid and real than mine, if that helps...
I have nowhere near as much basis of this in my childhood as you do, and cant say ive ever felt such intensely about wishing i was a girl, only that i thought life would be better if i was...
So long story short i think i might be on the borderline between trans and transtrender fraud, anf by comparison you are far closer; but i cant say who you are, i can only compare our experiences...
I hope this helps, and don't just tell your father your confused, it'll set you back. You don't have to tell him your definitely trans, but tell him how you feel, unless you expect the outcome to be worse of course...
>>5912896
Honestly i think you're right on the line where you could probably pass without ffs, but it would definitely really help...
Work on your eyebrows and get laser first, you might see a dramatic improvement, but if you're still not happy then go for the ffs, but its hard to tell now...
So I'm scared and confused and losing my fucking mind over thinking I might be trans, so i got desperate and did this stupid COGIATI test online to try and gain some clarity...
15 minutes and 75 questions later it comes back with... i might be trans. Great, thanks for the help, really insightful...
Does anyone know an online resources specifically for those unsure, or who dont fit the trutrans narrative? Im seeing a therapist but sessions are few and far between and I'm starting to get obsessive...
>>5914155
the only one who can tell if you're trans is yourself
>>5914258
Yeah but I don't know if I'm making it up...
I feel like because I don't know for sure, and haven't always known, I'm somehow subconsciously transtrender or just seeking attention or trying to create something interesting about myself...
>>5914301
Unfortunately, I'm not really in a good mindset to give advice at the moment. I'll just say that you're not alone - I'm going through the exact same thing.
For what it's worth. :/
My nipples are extremely sore and sensative, I know this is kind of to be expected. But its starting to get in the way of everything and if i bump them when im working I FEEL IT OUCH!! its nice because my pecs have gotten soft and fatty I literally hace B-cup breasts right now and when its playtime, I just rub my new tits and I start getting so turned on :)
But I'd like to know when the soreness will go away its only been goin on for a short time but thats the only part that bothers me
>>5914301
>>5915428
Me too
Just let these panicked feelings run their course then you will know a little more. Continue to live your life with that newfound awareness. Imagine how you'd be if you were a girl during your everyday interactions. Imagine your life in five years, how do you ideally see yourself?
>>5914155
That test is fucking stupid, anyways. Every question is basically "DO YOU LIKE THIS BLATANTLY FEMALE THING OR THIS BLATANTLY MALE THING?"
MTF jsut started HRT and I have a few very serious questions I'd like to ask.
Please keep in mind, I am not a big fan of surgery at all, or needles. So I'd like to avoid going under the knife as much as possible.
How much facial femininization can be expected on just hormones alone? over say 6 months? or a year?
I still have facial hair, but if I shave close I look younger and a little more Feminine. but I still dont like what I see. I will get my whole body and facial hair lasered off as soon as I can. I just want to be smooth.
I need to start doing something with my eyebrows too, they are naturally dark and thick mine are thinner than anyone else in my family convenient for me, but they look somewhat messy. I dont mind having somewhat thick eyebrow, I dont think I want to go too thin and I dont want to fuck it up plucking them, my electrolysis lady tells me its better not to pluck, but Im not really ready to tell anyone I'm trans yet. but feel like she may already suspect something as I've had her take out any traces of a unibrow and clean up my eyebrows a little already. I dont think she gets alot of men in her office. She even told me at my first appointment that they have trans customers. anyways still traying to keep my situation on the DL for now
My head hair I'm nervous to go to a salon, I am currently still in boymode and my hair is still very short. it just looks messy. I dont know what I'm doing with it, i've aways had it short because it was easier to manage and blend in as a boy with short hair but I'm dont with that. I'm trying to take good care of it, but i cant do much else with it till its longer. and the last few times I go for a "trim" to keep it neat they always take too much off and i'm back where I started.
I should be good on doing my makeup, but will gladly accept any tips, advice, or recommendations.
What are some good workouts and routines to help my body get a nice girly figure?
I changed my diet to super healthy. chicken and fish are the only meats I eat I eat alot more fruit and veggies, nuts and berries.
I'm not gonna be a petite stick figure, and i'm ok with that. I'm not fat but i do want to slim my waist alot more. I'm walking and running. my legs and arms I think are right where I want them but my waist makes me look a little boxy. I want a little more of an hourglass figure obviously
>>5915890
>>5915890
you adress that by making your butt bigger and losing more weight. Jog every other day and do assisted squats, curtsy lunges and bridges.
>>5915461
Well I'm finding it morea nd more difficult to imagine a future for myself as.a.man, if tthat'swhat you mean...
Actually it's not too hard to imagine myself getting ffs and living fulltime them... huh
I guess i'm just not comvinced 100% and afraid of throwing away the normal mundane life ive been told i wanted since i was born...
So, I'm not sure about my orientation. On the one hand, I kind of like guys and have a real attraction to some. But at the same time, most of my friends and most of my socialization has been males. I feel like I've overdosed on guy shit, so it makes the thought of being with one really unappealing unless they meet a very high standard. I feel like I have missed out on so much girl time growing up, so even though I'm not as viscerally attracted to them, I feel like it would be more emotionally fulfilling.
Has anyone else felt this way, or am I just fucked up?
>>5916695
I'm actually experiencing something like that. I never really considered being with a guy before, I mean I fooled around with a friend once. Never did anything else. I lived the life of a straight male for a long time, I've always been attracted to women, eventhough I wanted to be one. Although since starting hrt, I dont know how much is in my head and how much is the estrogen seeping into my brain, but I'm finding myself attracted to some men more and less with women. Its a very strange feeling I agree. but i dont think there is any sense worrying about it, you get no judgement from me
>>5916695
Being attracted to guys and being around only male friends and family is really an uncomfortable position, I can relate.
I'm even scared to talking to girls now, like as if it may be easier for them to penetrate my closet cover.
Should I start to take some moderate hormonal shit before I can afford HRT to save myself for the future?
I can get a handle on soy isoflavones, but I'm not sure of it's effects. I it going to give me boobs and ruin my man cover or will it on the contrary do nothing?
>>5916563
Based on my experiences, it's a pretty normal feeling. I know that that doesn't really help you with making a decision, but still. It kind of makes sense that you'd feel some sense of apprehension at getting rid of what you've accepted as "normal" for something completely different. I think that what's maybe important to focus on is the things that won't change. You'll still be you. You'll look different, sure, and people may treat you differently depending on how tolerant they are. But if you've got a song that always makes you feel great, no matter your mood? That'll still be there. Your favourite movie/TV show/video game/book? Still there. Your thoughts and feelings? Still there, it's just that they won't be so dissociated with your body.
Sorry if I went off on a bit of a tangent there. Half the time I write these as much to reassure myself as to reassure others. :/ Anyway, hope it helped, even if just a little.
What gives you hope?
>>5917037
Yeah, thanks dude, you've helped me more than you realize
And you gotta tell me that story about your nickname sometime ;)
>>5917274
Idk really, desu
I know I don't just kill myself because im self aware enough to know that would be a dick move to the people around me, even if they don't like me very much, because they're good people, and I don't want amyone to feel like it was their fault...
But hope is a different thing... it's pretty minimal, i guess, but i just feel like life exists in stages, or like story arcs, and there are good ones and bad ones and you just gotta make it through...
Also looking at transition timelines is nice, i guess
>>5916939
save your money for shit that actually works
So I dressed up last night in some new clothes that had just arrived, and when looking in the mirror i wasn't dissapointed for the first time...
I always thought I was mostly agp-meme and when I would get to that point i would pretty much explode, but i wasnt even really that aroused- I was just happy.
I was genuinely smiling for the first time since i can remember, and I managed to just feel good in a way i cant really describe
Am I making progress against my repression? Does this mean I might actually be trans? and did anyone else have a similar experience?
>>5918552
What did you wear?
>>5918581
Posted this in the crossdressing thread, sorry for the lewdness, I know I look like shit too, but it's the first time ive dressed and havn't felt like crying so...
Also i need to drop about 15 kilos and get some actual ladies tops but that shit takes time
Is there much of a correlation between trans-attraction and gender dysphoria? coming from someone who has been heavily trans-attracted all their life who is only coming to terms with their possible gender issues...
>>5918993
Well according to [trans]folk's wisdom, some chasers live vicariously through the transgirls they date.
>>5919072
Well I definitely do that with the women in my life, but I don't know if that's the basis of my attraction...
>>5917889
So it doesn't work or what?
I pretty much only want to save myself for the future, so I'm not going to buy some strong stuff like pueraria mirifica that will make my boobs grow.
I've seen it in the store nearby and it's not that pricy, so the question is will it do anything at all to at least give it a try?
>>5919375
>strong stuff like pueraria mirifica
m8..
>>5919384
Well, I've seen pictures of people growing boobs because of this, sounds strong enough to me desu.
>>5919402
it's your money, do what you want. but since you're talking about saving up just know that spending it on useless shit will put you further away from the real stuff
<<5918552
I am in this exact scenario. Girlfriend went out for a few days and I have just been trying all of her clothes on and playing with makeup. It feels really soothing. I don't feel totally feminine though. I need to look into the mirror to really feel excited about myself. But sometimes I will catch myself behaving feminine naturally, and that's when it all feels perfect. I can't really tell what's going on, maybe my T is making the feelings more difficult than the thoughts. I just know that those moments between the noise are divine.
>>5919415
I know what you mean man...
Even if I'm not feminine at all, just the improvement I get from just putting on and being the clothes makes all the paranoia and self-loathing and confusion and fear worth it...
In fact, I've had a shit day, and everyone in my house has gone to bed, so I'm going to get dressed up, put on some lipstick, watch tv and shit-post, and just be okay with msyelf for a minute...
>>5919410
So is it useless then?
Because these money won't really relate to the ammount I need and to the time I need to get the real stuff. And it sounds reasonable to lay some background before I can afford HRT so I will be less of a hon when I start it.
What matters to me is still, will it do anything helpful at all?
>>5919473
Different anon responding to you.
You want to avoid anything herbal for HRT, or things that are not really intended as HRT. To get sufficient results it will be too harsh on side effects and more expensive than the real thing.
If you wish to avoid growing breasts, but want to increase your chances of passing in the future, then the way to go is to reduce your testosterone. The real thing is what you want to be on, spironolactone or cyproterone acetate is cheaper than you think. For me using qhi, it costs me 25 euros a month to be on Cypro. And I know you can get it cheaper if you use the other websites. 50mg of Cypro a day for me, got my testosterone down so low it is lower than female levels. (13ng/dl, natural female ranges are 20-80ng/dl)
If you seek to not completely nuke your testosterone, which does have risks if you don't also supplement estrogen which I understand you are not ready for yet, then you can do something like 100mg of Spironolactone a day. It will do a fair bit less compared to a full dosage(200mg of spiro or 50mg of cypro), but it will significantly reduce your testosterone levels, and this is a lot cheaper. (I'm guesstimating less than $15 a month.)
Reducing your testosterone, depending by how much will either slow down or stop any further masculinization. So your bone structure won't further evolve in the direction you don't want, your body hair and facial hair will slow down and not develop more hairs, etc.
>>5919528
Thanks for the advice, appreciate that.
But what if I already have a pack of soy isoflavones, would it be good/bad/neutral to take them since I have them anyway?
Someone in maybe the last thread said taking progesterone too early halts breast growth. Where did they get that from?
>>5919631
Don't take them at the same time as estradiol since it and the inferior phytoestrogens will both be competing for receptors.
>>5919631
It's an estrogen, it will do very little to prevent masculinization.
But if you have it already, why not? I guess. But my advice is still for you is to get on the real deal.
How likely is a family doctor to refer someone to an informed consent clinic if they hadn't brought up being trans before? The IC requires a referral. Is there a chance for gate-keeping? I made the appointment yesterday and am nervous about it. Also, how common is it that informed consent clinics require referrals? Doesn't that defeat the purpose because gate-keeping can get involved?
inhousepharmacy.vu legit yes or no?
>>5920402
Yup, have been ordering from there for the last 4 years.
How do I fix my shitty posture and make it more feminine?
>>5920191
Gatekeeping is very very important.
can someone get me a list of what i need from a GP while transitioning?
blood monitoring and such? i dont even know what to say or ask for
im mtf
>>5920718
Care to elaborate on that?
>>5920710
Stretching, all kinds.
also
>Stand tall
>shoulders back
>tighten belly
>>5920815
Gatekeeping doesn't effect legitimate trans people one bit. It weeds out transtrenders and AGPs and "femboys" who think they should be allowed body mutilating hormones.
Let's be real here. Transitioning sucks. The process to ensure that you're out of all other options is so important.
>>5920927
So are you one of the "trutranses" who thinks that only people who fit into a narrow radical narrative should be able to live their lives as they want.
The point of informed consent is to weed such arbitrary opinions out.
>>5920979
Arbitrary opinions? You mean the opinions of the best practices as recommended by the WHO?
Yes. Transgender is tied to a diagnosis. No diagnosis, no transition. Is it that hard to understand?
>>5920979
>trutrans
>truscum
Go the fuck back to tumblr
>>5920979
Yes. It's a narrow set of criteria. When you consider that other conditions like autism can reflect with transitory symptoms like gender dysphoria, it's important to weed out the fakes.
Anyone know what the waiting list at the Charing Cross GIC is like?
>>5920987
There are many incidents of arbitrary decisions by therapists, like forcing to live as a crossdresser for years or dressing like a stereotype, not everyone of them can be considered as "best". Diagnosis with gender dysphoria, which also can by misdiagnosed, is only a sign that a person may be in a more need of transitioning, it's not "tied" to anything nor is preventing transition.
>>5920994
It is literally in the FAQ of this thread, if you are triggered by criticism of your trutrans narrative, get back to /pol/
>>5921009
That's the point of the informed consent though, if you are mentally capable of being responsible of your informed consent then you have a right to transition and bear all the responsibility. Obviously people with conditions that cripple their mental capabilities, like autism, require special attention.
>>5921081
If you self diagnose with GID and then get butthurt when you're not taken seriously, then you're not fit for informed consent.
>>5921081
>tumblr transtrender
>accused others of being triggered
Lmao holy shit.
>>5921099
GID, not taken seriously and informed consent has little to do with each other. You may not be taken seriously despite whatever traits you are having, it depends on a person and has nothing to do with anything.
If you are mentally capable of informed consent, you are pretty much responsible for whatever butthurts you may have, and if you don't have a GID there are not that many reasons for you to consent to transition. Is it so hard to understand?
>>5921104
>ad hominem insults
>tumblr
>haven't even read the FAQ of the thread one is shitposting
I'm not sure you are in the right place.
>tfw you first start trying to train your voice and it feels like you just got vocal cord parasites
>>5921201
You'll get over it in time. If it's really bad, listen to some music to drown out your voice while you practice.
>>5920927
So what dipshit? Even if that's true, its your body and you should be able to do what you want with it. Why do you hate freedom so much?
>>5920850
What sort of stretching would you recommend?
>>5921166
Transtrender scum like you make it harder for real trans people.
Inb4 tumblr buzzwords trying to claim fral transgender people are the problem here.
>>5921235
Anything and everything you can find. The more the better. You'll find a lot of information with a quick Google search.
>>5921233
Just like a doctor won't amputate a healthy arm, nor should they provide you hormones for vanity or not illness reasons. That's why the system exists. Thats why gatekeeping is important.
>>5921242
Nice "ad hominem" again, hon.
I would say that it's especially retarded "trutrances" who make it harder for the majority of trans people, but I'm not sure you are even one and not just a shitposter kid from /pol/.
>>5921288
>more tumblr buzzwords
>>5921288
You're not really helping your case bruhfriend.
>>5921288
Can you please stop shitposting and shitting up the thread? Thanks.
>>5921285
>Thats why gatekeeping is important.
Just because you say so? Human agency gives me the right to make decisions that I feel are in my own rational self interest. There shouldn't be any arbitrary restrictions on what people feel is best for their own health.
>>5921301
Nice projection senpai.
>>5921419
shitposting still. Can you fuck off? Seriously. Take goir agenda elsewhere.
>>5921419
give in two of them and not the other three I'd say you're wrong.
Okay board, I own a few articles of girl's clothing, can do basic makeup, that whole deal. My question is now, however, how do I stop being a pussy and actually transition? (mtf, u18 btw). Secondly, where to buy hormones online? Alldaychemist seems to be the best place... thoughts?
>>5921285
If there are burgers offered somewhere on a discount to people who are hungry, should people only get them if they prove to some arbitrary judge a deep unconcious desire to feast on them? Or should everyone be free to afford burgers if they feel hungry?
>>5921463
Go to any clinic in your area. Lie and say you just moved there and you're out of your pills. Know what pills and dosages you're on. Get prescription. Profit.
>>5921464
If there is a medicine that is available to help with a mental and physical illness that's contentious at best, should everybody just be allowed to opt in and take it?
>>5921285
>oh man, these people are doing something that I don't approve of that doesn't affect my life or society in any way. i'll make sure that i post my shit opinions on a chinese animation forum
>>5921494
If they are capable of providing consent on using it accordingly, yes.
FACIAL HAIR PROBS:
I can't afford proffessional electrolysis/laser right now.
I have great tools and can get a perfectly smooth, hairless passable shave. I have a great makeup routine that conceals shadow, again totally passable. The problem is within 3-4 hours I have a bumpy face because the hair has started to grow back already. It doesn't cause shadow (stays under the makeup) but the bumps are super obvious.
Any suggestions on how to conceal it better without being a cakeface?
>>5921539
Cont'd: Self electrolysis, waxing my face, etc? Things I find some discouragement from but not a lot of personal experience or information.
>>5921539
You can't afford $170 for seven sessions total of full face laser thus ensuring this will never be an issue again?
>>5921552
I've never found quotes that low? Maybe I've misunderstood and read it as "170 dollars per session" which was impossible for me (right now).
Just to put a point into a discussion: the FAQ of this post contains a criticizm of a "true trans" narrative, /mtfg/ has a list of consent providers in the OP post, as well as pastebin of useful links in this general.
If you want to shitpost about these issues, I'd recomment you to do it in some other thread.
>>5921564
It's per 7 sessions.
Use Groupon. Then instead of buying from Groupon directly, go for a consultation at the clinic and suggest buying the deal directly. They don't give 50% to Groupon that way. Then see how much further they'll go for you.
>>5921586
idk where you live but here in sweden, beard removal laser is 190 dollars for ONE session and thats the cheapest i could find! the transgender health will pay for it but only after you've been approved and evaluated which takes 2 years,,,
anyways, a tip is to invest in a philips lumea ipl device, that and the hormones have almost completely halted my beard growth
>tfw psych mom found is gonna help with hrt
>>5920191
you sure the referral isn't for your insurance?
>>5921489
They don't ask you to show an old prescription, bottle, or tell the doctor who used to prescribe them to you?
>>5921828
Just say you don't have it and sound outraged and impatient and that you need them today.
As someone who works in retail and also has a pharmacy, as long as you sound mad they'll bend over backwards to get you to go away.
>tfw too blonde for laser
>tfw $50 per hour is the best I can find in Toronto
>>5921970
Try electrolysis
>>5921990
Yeah, that's what I mean. Laser won't work, so I need to do electro at $50/hr which I can't currently afford.
Is it realistic to expect jaw work this extensive to be possible? How much would it cost with Bart van de Ven on its own?
>>5922019
Pretty sure no surgeon can realistically remove that much bone but the shape of the chin can be changed + height reduced to make it appear alot smaller
Heads up for those self-medicating with Finasteride/Proscar: I just got a prescription from a dermatologist for 1mg. I was told by the doctor that 5mg is only for enlarged prostate. I know some people are taking 5mg and advise others to do the same. Stop that shit.
>>5922174
I order 5mg and just cut them in half, its cheaper that way from where I buy
>>5922448
I suppose that works.
>>5922174
It's a cost thing, the 5mg pills tend to be cheaper so cutting them to 2.5mg is cheaper and more effective than using pairs of 1mg pills.
UK here
so it's possible I've got BPD and OCD, which I imagine might mean whatever gender therapist I see will refuse to write a letter of recommendation for FFS
can I get it anyway by waving money under the surgeon's nose and waiving their liability or is it mandatory to have a letter?
>>5918595
you look nice :)
>>5922518
Your BPD and OCD could be the reason you feel dysphoric. Are you so fucking arrogant as to not even consider that's an option?
>>5922541
rude desu
>>5919445
I love this kind of feeling
>>5922518
BPD and GID is easy to confuse with each other. Tackle this with a therapist at a different angle and get a second opinion to be sure.
Also, a letter of recommendation for FFS? Why, do you have insurance which covers it?
>>5922541
Are you suggesting HRT wouldn't alleviate their dysphoria?
>>5922570
I'm suggesting that you shouldn't permanently alter a body if treating an underlying mental illness (BPD and OCD are both manageable) could actually make the dysphoria go away.
>>5922583
Don't confuse me with that other Anon.
How is BDP and OCD manageable? You mean medication, or strictly therapy? Both?
>>5922592
Both, yes.
>>5922560
>BPD and GID is easy to confuse with each other
In which way though?
>>5922610
BPD can and often does present with minor disassociation including feels of genre dysphoria. Combined with the tendency to obsessive behavior and you have a recipe for people who are CERTAIN they must have GID.
>>5922583
Has that ever been shown to be the case?
Almost certain BPD isnt even a real disorder and OCD causing intense gender dysphoria? I kind of doubt that.
>>5922653
Well, I'm not even sure Gender Dysphoria is a real disorder, and yet here we are.
>>5922583
BPD and OCD if left untreated can develop into GID. In that case, I believe HRT is appropriate.
>>5922672
Do you have anything to back up these claims?
>>5922682
No, but the logic is that if someone with BPD and/or OCD obsesses about GID for a long enough period without treatment, it becomes internal and permanent.
>>5922714
Mental conditioning, in other words. Old habits die hard and all that.
>>5922714
Well, I'm ought to believe if someone has reasons to pick as ones long time obsession a personal gender identity, they may as well have some prerequisites for a gender dysphoria.
>>5922757
Not necessarily. A lot of people use "muh denial" and "muh repression" to explain why they've never felt gender dysphoria at a younger age.
That's not to say they're wrong. I'm only suggesting that a person can "force" the prerequisites for GID upon themselves.
>>5921799
I'm pretty much 100% sure it is. I'm just not used to referrals and was wondering if they were serious shit
>>5922781
I guess, but I think if it is going on as a pattern for a long time and not just as an "obsession of the month" it may as well be hinting at something.
>>5922812
Exactly. That's why Gender Dysphoria is distinct from other diagnosis because it's something which persists for more than six months, according to DSM-V.
>>5922812
Then why do some people report GID coming and going throughout their life?
>>5922852
Same. I don't know what's real anymore and I feel like I'm beginning to forget my past because it's convenient for me in order to diagnosis myself with GID.
>>5922812
Anon who made the original post here, I've had dysphoria since age 11, aka the first signs of puberty. It's not a transient obsession.
>>5922845
Well the key is "throughtout their life" and not just one day you feel like a grill for the first time and immediately rush to the psychatrist to give you hormones.
>>5922860
and this is why self diagnosis is dangerous and why gatekeeping is important.
>>5922860
I know what you mean, and I was just getting confident in probably having dysphoria when this came up... My mind is such a blur too that I can't really tell when I started obsessing over this... I think it's been a few months but idk
>>5922019
You can go to Korea to get the double-jaw procedure, but it's so invasive that it's only meant for people with an underbite. It's a dental procedure, but some surgeons also make it cosmetic.
>>5922870
Awareness and understanding is more important. My experience with gatekeeping has not been at all beneficial. I'm dealing with a doctor who has little experience with trans patients and as such is refusing me treatment despite me doing the best I can in my situation to make sure this is the right decision for myself.
>>5922870
It doesn't contradict the informed consent though, because it's not really informed if person have hard time discerning what is real from what is not, and may not be totally aware on what one is consenting on.
>>5922900
>shitty doctors just being bad
This is what really scares me. I don't know what to do because I don't want to waste time dealing with the terrible doctors in my podunk area but I also have no idea about doing things on my own.
Suicide?
>>5922956
Get a letter of recommendation for HRT from a qualified therapist. That's usually enough to convince any doctor to prescribe HRT.
having ipl done, seeing some results but still hair growing after around 5 sessions keep going or try and switch to laser?
>>5917274
I'm due to get like $200k in four years so if I'm still an ugly fuck by then I can have tons of plastic surgery
In the mean time I use video games, TV and movies to escape from the crushing reality of losing the coin toss in the womb and being a big gross ugly fucking man
Just have to survive another four years...
Right, well, when the possibility of getting FFS approaches I guess I'd better just lie and say my craziness symptoms are subsiding until I've had it done. Damn ridiculous that my own consent doesn't matter as much as the hit-and-miss lottery of getting a well-educated gender therapist.
>>5917274
It's not like I have much to lose.
If I somehow happen to earn a considerable bunch of cash to afford the stuff I want, including gender related stuff, I want by the time I've not yet started to turn into senile, then it's going to be great.
If not, I guess life of a lonely reclusive alcoholic with no personal life is not that bad.
>>5923004
Why do you need a recomendation for a FFS though?
>>5922979
>qualified therapist
gender therapist or any therapist?
>>5923028
See section VIII of WPATH to get an idea of what is recommended.
http://www.wpath.org/uploaded_files/140/files/IJT%20SOC,%20V7.pdf
But yes, Gender and/or Sex therapists are preferable.
>>5922900
>>5922956
>>5922870
Gatekeeping is a fucking travesty, it is completely counter productive and this is coming from someone who has been through the whole system.
At 19/20 I was referred on, okay no problem several weeks wait time but whatever fine. First psychiatric mental health appointment, was told I was too young and "pretty" at 19 turning 20 ish to look into transitioning and that I should just go fuck some girls and live a normal life no joke. So this completely causes me to spiral and doubt everything repress it for a few more months and go back.
Round two second appointment, got denied treatment again because I told them my sexual preference is bi leaning more towards guys, get told only gay people can be trans not bi or straight lmaooooooooo.
Doubt myself dont go back again for a few more months, finally get referred and now I have to wait a year for a fucking appointment. Get denied again on my second appointment because even though I have changed my name grown my hair and am fucking dressed as a women I have not presented this name change to my bank so I will now have to wait another 3 fucking months while self medding.
If they can think of any single reason to stop you they will. Transitioning is the worst case scenario, the failure output. Informed consent is a lifesaver, you wouldnt deny treatment for any other illness or problem yet people do with this despite the fact that delayed treatment leads to suicide and negative health effects.
If you parents cant support you, or you dont have the money to pay for this stuff up front or you live outside of America and Canada you are screwed. Well and truly screwed and thats assuming you pass as well after this whole mess. Transgender people have life bad enough as it is, gatekeeping just makes it worse.
>>5923026
Well, I did ask whether it was necessary but nobody answered that part of the question so I guess I should hope for the best but expect the worst. If the surgeons don't give a shit as long as you've got the moolah and aren't an obvious bag of twitchy-eyed-crazy nerves then that's perfect.
>>5923069
Holy FUCK. S-so..... I should go to an IC clinic? I'm an Americunt.
Or should I just kill myself? I have a gun right now.
>>5923069
From one side I'm happy to learn from the honest feedback about gatekeeping, but from another - fuck this is depressing.
Goodbye hope, hello future full of loneliness and cheap alcohol.
>>5923103
Get informed, start self-medicating. See a therapist, get a letter of recommendation. Get a letter, give it to an endocrinologist or other specialist. In that order.
>>5923118
Or just go to an IC clinic instead and bypass the letter.
You should still see the therapist and endo.
Are there any IC clinics outside of North America though?
Hi, I need some help. I'm currently out of my home state in Florida and I think I may only have one chance to get to an IC clinic, for one visit while I'm down here. I don't know anything about self medding properly and I need as much guidance as possible. I want to do things right, have proper breast developement and normal levels, I know nothing about what dosage is good for me and maybe I'll care about breastmilk but probably not right now.
What do I do? I'm pre everything, and getting a therapists letter and all that probably isn't possible for me. I feel like I'm running out of time and I have no insurance.
>>5923236
http://pastebin.com/raw/yzMzTA5u
>>5923247
Holy shit thank you
These are like, legit and work right? Not just generic guesstimates? Am I wrong in thinking that some people might need very specific doses or are these for the most part universally ok?
>>5923140
>You should still see the therapist and endo.
For what purpose do I need to see both? I know jack shit about what either of these can do for me
>>5923269
It's the standard self-medicating regimen that works for most people. The meds from inhouse are legit.
You might be able to suppress your testosterone to female levels without needing to take 200mg Spironolactone and 8mg Estrofem. This is why it's a good idea to titrate the medication and get your hormone and blood levels checked as you increase doses.
>>5923298
Endocrinologists are endocrine/hormone specialists. They can check your hormone levels, assess your physical development on HRT, and suggest/prescribe medication.
You may not have Gender Dysphoria and transition may not be right for you, so seeing a therapist to help figure this out is a good idea. See >>5923049
>>5923326
6mg is the usual dosage, but I've heard someone take up to 24mg. The 8mg in the pastebin might even be a typo.
What is the worst thing that can happen if I do HRT by myself?without a doctor involved?
>>5923341
>6mg is the usual dosage
ignore that I have no idea what I'm tlaking about
also i think inhouse is far overrated compared to the other sites
>>5923348
Kidney/Liver trouble. With no blood monitoring you don't know if you're doing damage.
>>5923348
Assuming MTF, probably the worst would be to kill your liver, but you'd have to be taking retarded doses or already have liver problems. Of course, there's lots of shit that could go wrong, the chances just aren't high.
>>5923348
I heard a story from my therapist of a person who was self-medicating and taking blood pressure medication at the same time. They eventually needed to go to the emergency hospital and to get a stent for their heart.
Sorry to disrupt, but going back to our earlier conversation, I just did a bunch of tests for boderline personality disorder that all returned high chance...
I'm so sorry, I don't think I should be here, I've been talking to you people for weeks now and I guess I've just been seeking identity, acceptance and validation by appropriating your issues.
Fuck, I'm so so sorry, you're all good, kind, caring people and you don't deserve my transtrender bullshit...
>>5923391
someone is soon going to say mean things to you but ignore it,youre cool,everyone is shit one way or another,no exceptions,even people that may look great or heroic,just embrace it and live the moments,try to play whatever role life gives you as best as you can
godspeed
>>5923384
Don't be an idiot like me and overdose with 400mg of Spironolactone. I experienced every known side-effect. Shit sucks.
>>5923391
Online tests are bullshit.
>>5923391
It's possible to be borderline and trans, as shitty as that would be. Talk to a fucking therapist, online tests can't diagnose shit.
>>5923448
I have one, but whenever I try to talk to her about personality disorders she says she doesn't want to put me into categories (Which sounds like the kind of thing you'd tell a highly susceptible suspected borderline who just wants to fit in and would create their own symptoms to better conform 2bh...)
But when I brought it up last time she was a lot more willing to concede I might be trans, and that she had suspicions but idk...
But I can't see her again till the fucking 15th of april, and am only going to see the psych who writes my prescriptions before them, who has no bedside manner and barely knows who I am...
Should I bring it up with him or just wait for my main?
>>5923298
My therapist is like a sanity check for me. Her opinion can be reassuring when I'm in doubt.
>>5923482
I take it from the lack of responses I'm as insane as I think I am... :(
Bumping out of sheer lonely desperation, because despite the fact I confessed and apologised and said I was gonna go away, I have in fact been monitoring this thread for literally 12 hours straight today...
>>5924770
Thanks, I know I shouldn't put my issues on other people to explain but I'm really confused and scared and honestly look up to you all...
I'll try and see if she can do an appointment a week earlier when she gets back from her holiday, but until then I'll try and get it to the back of my mind:
Only thing is it was the single thing I thought about before I had the borderline v trans conflict so everything's a little on edge right now...
I guess i'll keep drinking, eating chocolate and dressing when I get a chance until then :/
Guys do you have some girl fashion tutorial?
>>5925895
You are welcome.
>>5923448
i'm a trans girl with bpd, aspd, possibly (covert) npd. it's utter hell man
>>5926014
>possibly NPD
Are you diagnosed with any of these? Because having BPD will preclude you from getting a GID diagnosis,
Does insurance usually cover going to a planned parenthood thing? My therapist says one opened up in our city a few months ago, and that I can try there for blood tests and hormones.
I'd hope that insurance would at least cover the blood tests/cost of just visiting if there is one.
My insurance is humana. I live in the U.S.
My therapist gave me the number already. I just need to know if I need to save up a fuckton of money for this. If I do have to pay for everything then that's shit, because I make $80 a month.
>>5926035
yeah, bpd and aspd are officially diagnosed along with mdd, gad, autism and adhd. still not sure of npd, tho it makes sense.
>>5926058
>tho it makes sense
STOP SELF DIAGNOSING
>>5926058
Jeez, is there anything you are not diagnosed with?
I'm not a specialist, but I'd consider thinking about changing a psychiatrist who diagnosed you with every meme disease known to men.
>>5926121
listen to the expert here
>>5925895
bump
I'm interested too
I know someone has the pic saved
>>5926121
Google "comorbidity".
also basically my entire family, immediate and extended, is fucked up in a lot of ways
>>5926487
Well, I guess, but even then that big of a list of vague disorders still looks shady.
Hi, I just wanted to say thanks to everyone for the great info in this thread. I've only recently realized that I may be transgender (mtf), and the stuff in the OP is really helping me figure stuff out. It'll take a while to digest.
I hope everyone here has a great day and wish you all the best of luck on your journeys, shitposts or no.
>>5927085
Oh my god thank you actually <3
I forgot that all that existed, and the Natalie Reed article is really helpful, i might just make it through the day :3
>>5925895
go wander around and look at girls who look cute and see what they wear
>>5925895
From the /fa/ sticky
>>5928252
shit sorry didnt realise how compressed that was...
just go to tuxbell dot com and look under womens basics
I just started HRT 5 days ago, and it seems like changes are happening a lot faster than people usually say happen. My skin has gotten softer, my arm hair has been growing in slower, and it seems like my muscles are atrophying faster... does this have to do with my metabolism or something? Is it because I'm only 18? Does anybody else have any experience with things happening what seems abnormally fast?
>>5928377
Changes can happen faster or slower depending on the individual person. Same way kids don't all go through puberty at the same rate, look at any high school and you'll see girls in the same grade that are miles apart in development.
I'm FtM, so I imagine my experience isn't all that useful to you, but I had really fast changes too when I started T. I hadn't even come out yet, and I had to deal with my voice noticeably dropping and minor facial hair growth within a month.
>>5928377
Could it just be a placebo effect: that knowing you're going to get more fem lessens you dysphoria which brings how you perceive your body to be more in line with how you want it to be
i.e. because of the dysphoria surrounding your arm hair you only felt like it was growing faster than it was, and as the relief of hrt allieviates that slightly you are hyperbolizing your masculine features less...
Idk though i read it takes a month before even popping boners slows down so 5 days seems kinda quick
If you change your gender on Facebook will people see it? Like will it be a big announcement or somethint?
>>5928450
What I'm saying is I want to use tinder as a girl but I'm not out to my friends yet
>>5928458
>make fake account
>add it as a friend
>change its gender
>see what happens
can I be trans but not be feminine?
Like I hate the idea of kissing people to say hello, I hate it even more when I try to just handshake and the other person knows Im trans in denial so they try to kiss me and I just play along.
Im not affectionate at all either, I compare myself to real girls or other trans and they are always being nice and hugboxing. Im totally on the other side, Im mean to people and an asshole most of the time.
>>5928489
Do socially awkward, cold, bitch women exist?
They do? Then congrats! You're one that just so happens to be trans :3
>>5928497
Thanks :)
>>5928414
I've considered that and it's more than likely the case, but you never know.
>i read it takes a month before even popping boners slows down
Mine slowed down on the second day...I don't even get them throughout the day. They only appear in the morning.
Is it normal for particularly good looking/well passing trans girls to trigger your dysphoria?
>>5929093
Yes, because they are what you want to be and it hurts knowing you aren't.
>>5929125
But like as much or even moreso than cis girls?
I think it might be because i have prerty low/realistic expectations of myself but i also feel like im subconsciously making this up...
Hey guys, I started a thread because I didn't see this one, but this is the perfect thread for what I need.
>tl;dr need help supporting a friend going through mtf
A guy I have known for a few years and I consider one of my best friends is currently starting hormone replacements.
I think I have been a pretty good friend up until this point, referring to him as "her" and "she", I even went along shopping to replace the wardrobe, and generally just been going along like nothing is happening.
I'm just looking for tips on how to continue being supportive through this next big step. What did your loved ones do for you, what do you wish they had done?
>>5929140
Yes, more than cis girls. I'm having a hard time putting it into words, but passing trans that get you jealous are once who got lucky, started sooner, or somehow did things better than you did. Seeing them for me at least reminds me that I should have started so much sooner, and that "that is what I could have been right this moment if I applied myself back then."
>>5929146
I think the best way to go about it is to just see them and treat them as a girl, but remember they are still your friend on the inside and all the stuff you liked doing before she still likes doing...
So just keep that in mind and keep being a great friend :)
>>5929150
But i dont know if it's even a jealousy thing, I'm not even sure if i'm going to transition yet, and it's not always just the passing ones, but ones who don't pass but i find attractive as well...
how the hell did i repress being trans as a kid? i remember always wanting to be a girl for as far back as i remember but i wasn't girly at all growing up. how does something like that happen? nobody in my family takes me seriously because of it.
>>5930187
Fear of getting caught and what everyone would think of me did it here. I always wanted to try girls clothes on when I was real young, but thats the farthest I ever went because of fear.
>>5930537
but like.. how does a 5 year old repress? how did i know any better? i definitely remember wanting to be a girl at that age but there were no outward signs of it, which i feel is impossible
>>5930577
Kids are really good at picking up social cues and learning without thinking...
In the same way you just learned language and began to apply
it, you probable picked up gender roles and social norms and your lizard brain repressed the irregularities out of self-preservation.
>>5926046
Anyone?
>>5930577
I dont know How. but I did the same thing, I must have I figured out what I was and that people didnt consider it normal. and when a kid is scared the reaction is usually to hide
Is there a genetic test that will pick up on any chromosomal abnormality regarding my "x" and "y" genes?
I ask this because the chances are very high mine are xy, but I'd like to at least know for sure on the chance they may not be. there is such cases where people have xxy, or a xx-male. I'm just very curious that there may be a biological, genetic or the most likely a hormonal factor associated with me being trans.
I truly believe its a hormonal factor for me more than anything. I was always kind of androgynous, probly low T, and I've had gynecomastia since puberty, it seems that this amplified the affects the hrt has had on breast growth for me. I'm only two months on hrt and I have A-cups and am now wearing a sportsbra to help comceal them, because at this rate I may have at least B-cups in another month.
I just need to know for sure.
>>5931271
There are tests that can be done, yes. Maybe ask your doctor about them when you next see them.
>>5931271
You very likely have a chromosome problem. Probably the most likely one, even. Low T / androgyny + gynecomastia is basically textbook Klinefelter.
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Klinefelter_syndrome
Count yourself lucky, you're probably one of the best candidates for HRT, and you'll probably be attractive with zero issue.
