anybody going through ruff stuff @ home? wether alone, with s/o, or family etc...
lets talk about it ITT and get some good feels going; dry your tears. f#ck h8
L G B T ALL welcome to poast
ok so
>bee me
>grow up closet mtf basically my whole school life
>FF
>out of school now, 19y.o workan a small time deadend job, decent money but long hours, still stay w/mom,stepdad(though i love him like my biological dad)
>place i work at closes up so no more shekkels, somehow end up getting a bacterial infection in my balls
>dad not here anymore...mom neglects me, refuses to take me to hospital though i'm rithe in pain
>eventually get sis to take me, get meds, get clean, too late though, abnormal but benign growth on testical
>warned i need to have it removed eventually or i might end up with cancer
>sort of a good thing even though it really fucked me mentally...but still good because now i have an legit reason to get the testy remogal surgery
>during this whole time however ai cant get a job, no one will hire, couldn't work ANYWAY because the infection left one of my legs very weak so I would of probably broke something if i tried but i tried anyway because i wanted to help pull my weight, end up on welfare because this town i live in is just shit
>>5878976
>FF again
>nearly everyone in family hates me now, thinks i'm lazy, spoiled
>didnt tell them about what happened those few years ago, not that they'd care to that extent anyway they all are extremely entitled cis women that hate/discriminate against "faggots"
>still closeted but actively working toward coming out now because i'm about to be able to get the surgery and will be opting to start hormones also
>only a few more months from now
>anxious as fuck and also nervous because im going to have to shop for girl stuff for the first time in the middle of the summer
>not sure if i'll make it to see another winter and beyond because its extreme phohia here someone might try to kill me
>at this point i'm not even sure i care because i'm at wits end mentally though i'd obviously prefer to live
>havent had sex in nearly 8 years.....but i'm a virgin where it counts anyway so w.e just wonder if i'll ever get to experience it one day
life is strange but all in all....idk, i have a headache
>>5878976
After college I got a job where I am at least 5 hours from anyone who matters to me.
So alone here, I fill the time here with Paintball, skating, and vidya. Paintball is social because of the team and what not ,but they are just not those kinds of friends. I seem fine on the outside but inside I am alone and crying.
I tried to smoke weed to get over it. it only made it worse. Quit doing that started light drinking instead, it helps.
To chicken shit to get on grnder or anything like that.
Fug my life, I left so many opportunities with great guys unexplored because I was with women at the time. Going to get to see my brother and some friends this weekend though so something to look forward to.
>>5879042
>grindr
i keep hearing this app is garbage though anon. on the brightside, even though you did pass up on alot of guys, there's really(atleast not a glance) a shortage of men. Is your brother like you or just fool like that?
>>5880188
blah *cool
>>5879085
i think alot of it stems from me being the youngest desu. they always picked on me because of it as a kid but it was just jokingly then. now because i live here for free they're really taking it to heart it seems...usa though yea. nj. i literally cut off all of my "friends" because they were also extremely phobic regarding anything lgbt and i genuinely feared that they were trying to set me up to get killed too. you know how you just get a strong feeling and also how people can sort of tell you're a certain way after hanging around you long enough? it just wasnt worth it at all to keep them around. i'd like to make some new friends though even though i'm paranoid about certain things but only after i move to a safe haven for mtf's
>>5880230
plus the things they would talk about around me were telling. i dont need to around someone who thinks beating up someone purely for looking at them is ok.
>somehow end up getting a bacterial infection in my balls
w-wha?
>>5880230
>nj
Pls move to nyc and become my qt gf.
>>5880599
fuck off, chaser
I'm jus really fuckin lonely, man. I had a boyfriend earlier this year, but it didn't work out. I crave physical intimacy, but I don't know that I care for the shallow nature of hookups. I just want someone who I can sit down with, talk to, care for, and also fuck. I dunno, I think that things are going well for me - I'm in college and comfortable, classes are okay - my grades could be better, but at least I am moving forward with my life. I still can't help feeling like a reclusive loser who doesn't know how to interact, at times though.
ain't your personal blog fuckface
>>5880578
yea that was my initial reaction to when they explained it to me. for whatever reason my tube that let's out the p got infected and it spread quite a bit. it was actual spread to my lymph nodes as well which is kinda scary, but they gave me some anti fungal stuff and it cleared up pretty easy. I can feel the lump I have through my sack and it's not really sensitive but it feels weird and is annoying as all hell because I just want to like pop it like a pimple or something. srry if 2 much info
>>5880941
how common is this? can you get a balls infection just out of the blue?
>>5880614
>chaser
Wh-what? I'm not some fetishist but alright, you too m8.
>>5880685
>dont care for shallow hookup culture
hello me, what are you in college for?
t.b.h I wonder how recluse I'm going to be once I make the change dating wise. I feel like american culture is too independant for me in this category.
People are more likely to strive to distance themselves romantically and it's hard to get a real bonding experience.
Plus I'm pretty socially awkward when it comes to que's and unapologetically clingy.
>>5880954
According to the doc it's fairly common in males from mid teens to mid twenties.
It's not even a horrible thing to get as it's easily fixed I just lucked out because I didn't get immediate care so now it's a for life thing.
I just moved seven hours away from my home because my brother sexually assaulted me and my whole family took his side, and I hate the person I moved in with and their family
>>5881354
care to go in detail more? genuiely interested and not mockingly. I sometimes worry if my brother would try that on me because he's been to jail before for a long time.
