obviously this question doesn't apply if you already have complete acceptance from your parents for being lgbt.
but i was thinking earlier and as an mtf in the middle of transitioning, the best possible thing i think i could hear from them would be "actually you remind me a lot more of how you were as a kid now than you did a few years ago". to me that would mean that they really "get" it, that male puberty was wreaking havoc on my psychological health and making me dead inside. when i look at old photos and videos of myself as a kid i recognize the mannerisms, personality, and facial expressions as coming from the same person i am today, and i really feel like by living as a woman i'm just a more mature version of the boy i used to be (because realistically there was no way that "boy" could have ever been happy trying to be a man..... being a boy was ok, but being a man is something totally different, and it seems obvious when i try to look at kid-me from an outsider's perspective, that that child was never going to be comfortable with a man's body or trying to fulfill that role).
.....on the other hand, in pics/videos from my mid to late teens all i see is dead glazed over looks, nervous smiles, grimacing, and trying to hide my body. i spent those years trying to distance myself from who i was -- whereas in the past few years i've slowly reconnected with who i've been at all different times in my life, but especially the times when i was the most happy and vibrant.
tl;dr i wrote a long personal anecdote but you don't have to read it to answer the question and share your own story
>>5804436
Anon, that's adorable. I'm so happy that you're finding yourself. You deserve now that happiness you had then. That's you.
>>5804630
:D thank you anon <3
>>5804436
>"actually you remind me a lot more of how you were as a kid now than you did a few years ago"
That's a good one.
Here are two:
>Dad: "When you get married, I'm going to make sure I'm there to walk you down the aisle, even if it kills me."
>They start asking when I'll bring a boyfriend home or talk about my future life with a male partner, the same way they currently ask when I'll bring a girlfriend home and talk about some non-existent future as a heterosexual cis man with a wife and kids.
Though if they did either one, it would also make me sad because it's never going to happen. I'm going to die incel.
>>5804656
The walking down the aisle one is great. Haven't told my dad yet but I fucking love him and really hope he does that for me someday.
>what's the best thing your parents could possibly say to make you feel accepted?
"We're sorry for policing your identity, beating you so you lived in fear of us and then acted as if we had no idea what was up with you when you came out to us and swore we thought you were just a normal guy. We're sorry we outed you to people and took credit for things you achieved yourself with your transition so we can feel like good parents. We're sorry we didn't take your health concerns seriously as a child or believe you when you said about things with your body so you weren't diagnosed with an intersex disorder until your early 20s. We're sorry we continually blamed you for this and accused you of doing it to punish us. We've been really shitty in the past. We understand the transformation you're having to go through is both painful and expensive, perhaps we could help in some way instead of just patting ourselves on the back for not cutting you off entirely... like you want to do with that dick of yours eh son. hahaha. but seriously now, we'd like to help you if you would want that.'
I'd just like them to accept they had some responsibility in this.
>>5804708
the only way i ever got my parents to accept any responsibility for the things they did to me was by improving my relationship with them first and having a reconciliatory tone instead of an accusatory one when i brought up the past.
the truth is sometimes parents are immature and terrible at their job, and in those cases it's up to the kid to be the responsible adult
>>5804708
Good luck anon.
All they would need to say is. I love you.
>>5804436
Good for you OP.
The boat sailed on wanting my parents to accept me a long time ago, but if ever I bring home a cute trans girlfriend I’d want them to accept her, and accept her as a girl, mostly for her sake. Hearing them say, ‘You know we were pretty apprehensive at first but after hanging out with her for awhile it really is just like she’s one of the girls’, or watching my mom do girly things with her like cooking or shopping would just melt my heart like butter.
>>5805450
dawwwwww :(
>>5805459
this is one of the sweetest things i've ever heard
help i'm melting
Nothing, I don't want them to treat me differently, like I'm some freak. I know that's a lot to ask considering I'm mtf and I'm aware that I'm as different as it gets, but sometimes all I want is for people to treat me normally.
>>5804436
>dad always wanted a daughter after my brother was born
>gets another son
>son realizes he's trans
>"oh well at least dad will be happy!"
>tells me he wanted a real daughter, not a fag
I guess anything thay would mean he aknowledges me as a daughter
>>5805467
I know. I told them a year and a half ago. I live far away now in a different state. They just don't tell me. I think my dad only talks to me because my step mom makes him, and they are afraid I am going to kill myself.
I don't make him call my by my name or pronouns.
I think I may never see him or anyone in my family ever again. Sometimes
wow now I feel really sad.
>>5804436
>what's the best thing your parents could possibly say to make you feel accepted?
This is more of a hypothetical for the future but they could congratulate me on graduating college and stay out of my life
>I'm sorry
It'll never happen, and at this point, I don't think I'd feel anything if it did
>>5804436
nothing. they can just be nice and let me do my thing like they do right now. but i don't trust them or anybody else really to accept me. i have trust issues.
>>5804436
>"Oh you're dating a boy now? I wonder how long it'll take for you two to have sex"
>>5804436
My mom has become suprisingly supportive even said shes going to find me a laser hair removal specialist, gave me a bunch of new comfy boy shorts cause in her words if your going to be a girl you cant very well keep wearing guy clothes gave me sweaters, skirts and shoes this was the woman who just a year ago made me swear I would cut off my benis Lol I'm blown a way my mom is trying to push me out of boymode tho plz send help ;_; I'm not ready yet.
>We love you no matter what
>ok Natalie
>>5804436
"That's okay, Anon. We love you, and we want you to be happy with whomever you choose to spend your life with. So, when are we going to meet her?"
Because unless I have a girlfriend and our relationship is serious enough for me to introduce her to my parents, I'm not coming out to my father or his side of family, never.
>Sorry for beating you and sending you to Bible camp.
Since that's not happening nothing at all will be just fine.
>>5807341
would you forgive them and think of things as fine if they'd apologize?
>>5807395
of course, i mean they got sent to Bible camp, so that anon will be all about repentance, turning the other cheek and forgiveness :^)
At this point, if Mom would just let me go without constantly trying to "get me back on the correct path", I would be incredibly happy.
Probably just stop talking about me getting a boyfriend/girlfriend and giving them grandkids and not treating me like I'm broken for not wanting kids.
I basically want the opposite of speech. I want the lack of it.
For about 5 years my mom referred to me as my boy name, used male pronouns, and would refer to me just as "her kid."
Barely held tears back when she said "I'm lucky to have such a nice daughter," and while my dad who is still Mormon hasn't used the "d word" he has switched to my female name and calls me a she.
Not blind to the fact they're only just starting to stand by me as I'm closing in on having "made it," and that they weren't there for the hardest times, but I guess I'd rather have my family now than hold on and hate them for every bad thing they did.
It wouldn't be something my mother could say because I know she'd be accepting... At first.
But rather I'd like to come out to her and have her accept me and never change her mind just for the sake of getting in cheap blows whenever she tries to pick one of her petty arguments. I'd rather have her outright not accept me than pretend to do so because she wants ammo to inflict emotional pain.
>"Mom, Dad... I'm a girl."
>a few seconds of deafening silence pass
>"You've always been our girl."
The dream.
>>5804436
It's the weirdest thing with my family they always seemed so accepting of homosexuality my mom was always nice to the lesbian couple that lived down the street and the flamboyant gay guy of the neighborhood but the day I came out they freaked out, kept telling me it was only a phase and tried to pass it as some teenage drama thing
>>5804436
I can't think of anything specific, but some things I wish they hadn't said:
>"please don't be gay anon."
>"it's gross"
>"it's against god, they're going to hell"
>[regarding a person walking on the sidewalk with a skirt and heels] "oh my god, is that a man? ugh, that's totally a man! ew, look!"
I guess if they didn't give me shit for the small changes in appearance I made before even coming out or anything, it'd be nice.
"i don't care what you are, you'll still be my punk kid"
>>5804656
>heterosexual cis man
oh boy, the brainwashing is strong with this one
>>5809590
>oh my god, is that a man? ugh, that's totally a man! ew, look!
hahaha
>>5814385
You mean my parents are brainwashed, right? It didn't come out very clear, but I meant one thing my parents could do to show acceptance would be to show their acceptance is to stop talking about when I'll bring home a girlfriend and live the life of a straight cis male with kids and instead talk about me as a woman who is trying for/will have/has a male partner.
>>5804436
My mother was very accepting and stuff, dunno about my father he doesn't even know I'm trans. But I wish she would have actually helped me, I don't know anyone else so she was like the only female contact I had and she deeply regretted fucking up my childhood so bad, and now that I give her a second chance to be a proper mother she just keeps making up excuses to still not be anyone more than some woman I call by her name, not "mom".
Pls adopt me.
