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FtMg: Bored Edition
Old: >>5607453
Don't forget to sage and wait to make new threads until we're at bump limit on page 9-10.
Ancient map: https://www.zeemaps.com/edit/U0Hw9yNtqrJd-qzTdbUFMw
Some info (excuse the tumblr, it's truscum): http://helpfultransinfo.tumblr.com/tags/
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Google Hangout: TBA
>>5626995
Is this a thing?
>>5630341
Is what a thing? That response seemed like the b8 since gay ftms tend to like gay and bi guys who don't care about/for the defective junk.
>>5630341
>There seems to be a weird segment of cis gay guys who think that ftms will debase ourselves for a little bit of attention.
In my experience, yes.
>tfw you were scheduled to have top surgery this summer but you switched health insurance providers at the beginning of the new year because your old provider was going bankrupt and you find out that your new policy has a specific exclusion for anything related to "sex reassignment"
>tfw no top surgery in the foreseeable future
>tfw you've spent all day in bed getting as high as possible to try to numb yourself and stop yourself from wanting to an hero
>tfw you still want to an hero
>>5630438
If in the US get state insurance as a secondary, it has to cover it.
Me from other thread:
>>5626995
Serious question why is this bait/bad ?
>ftms will debase ourselves for a little bit of attention
where did I say I wanted them to debase themselves ?
I'm a bottom anyways.
>>5630438
Or get CreditCare
>>5630438
:( I'm sorry anon. I'm only praying that my insurance covers part of mine.
>>5630516
Ah that makes sense
>>5630484
Oh, I want to. The problem is, I have overly controlling parents (mom has BPD, dad backs up whatever crazy shit mom says) who refuse to see me as an adult. I'm 27 and living on my own, and it still hasn't hit them that I'm not a minor anymore.
My dad insisted upon me getting this specific plan because an insurance broker convinced him it was the best thing since sliced bread. He's vehement about me not being on the state insurance plan, even though the coverage would be much better than what I'm getting now. It may sound stupid, but if I cancel the private health insurance policy I have and get on the state health insurance plan so I can get top surgery, it will most likely be the end of my relationship with my parents. I'm almost ready to make that sacrifice because of what unreasonable assholes they're being about this whole thing. They see top surgery as a frivolous elective procedure and don't even understand why it's a big deal to me to suddenly find out that I'm not going to be able to get it done.
Sorry for whining, familia, but I'm more depressed than I've been in quite a while over this shit.
>>5630485
>I'm a bottom anyways.
I'm interested, fuck all the other dudes in the thread
>>5630565
They wouldn't be glad to stop paying for your insurance?
>>5630565
I think if you cut off contact with these people and mean it, you might find you miss it less than you think. And that if you do want to talk to them later, they are a lot more willing to compromise.
>>5630385
Right. The response wasn't how i've generally perceived things so.
>>5630402
Is this just something you think, or do other people also think this? Trying to work out if it's a real thing or not.
>>5630586
If you're interested, why do you want him to fuck all the other dudes in the thread? (not that i'm complaining)
>>5630783
>>5630402 is my post. The one I quote isn't.
The way I see it there are these guys who perk up if they know you're trans, because they think all ftms must be even thirstier than they are so therefore you'd be willing to go along with whatever they want, regardless of how they treat you.
It's just another subset of thirsty dude. You'll know him if you meet him.
>>5630565
Just switch and don't tell them? They pay for it directly?
Any one have an idea how much of a time you should have between top surgery and a hysto? How many months should you be post-op before getting another surgery?
>>5630516
>You used slightly too much edge
I'd think someone on 4chan would have slightly thicker skin but w/e
>>5630873
Bi guy here. I perk up if someone says they're trans because while i've known some real trainwreck trans people i've also known some really cool trans people and i'd be interested in you to see if you're the latter.
>>5630930
Yeah there's a difference between benevolent interest/curiosity and halfassed, thirsty chasers.
>>5630994
Right, but i'm genuinely wondering if now i'm being seen as a chaser and what the threshold for that is.
>>5630597
>>5630918
Yep, my family doesn't seem to understand the concept of "saving money" and my father insists that he has to pay for private health insurance for me (I'm an independent contractor, so I can't get insurance through my employer, and I was out of work for a long time). I would be immensely grateful...if I wasn't getting completely screwed by the insurance company. They aren't wealthy by any means, so they SHOULD be happy to stop paying for my insurance, but no.
>>5630783
I'm pretty ready to just cut ties with my entire family except for my little brother, so it'll probably come to that. I don't have many people in my life at all, though, so the idea of losing some of the few relationships I have is hard to swallow, even if the relationships are rather shitty.
I want to change my whole name to something inconspicuous and just drop off of the radar, but I have a lot of guilt already about "ruining my family" and I don't know if I can go through with something I know will hurt them badly.
>>5631031
Make new relationships man
Staying in touch with shitty people isn't worth it and you're by no means obligated to have them in your life
I applaud your concern for them but this is beyond them just disagreeing with your choices and has gone into them controlling you. Cut them off and get better people in your life,.
>>5631031
If a family can be 'ruined' by someone being gay or trans, protip: that family was already ruined a long time ago.
You can also meet new people that don't suck, and if you don't suck too they will likely be happy to know you. Do you need help to find out how to meet people?
>>5630485
bottoms who are into ftms are rare. most chasers are just curious about/thirsty for pussy. i'm a top and i'd fuck you anon.
>>5631036
>>5631041
Thanks guys. I really do need to try to meet some other people. I'm socially anxious and avoidant as fuck, though. Every week I tell myself I'm going to go out and do something social and every week I find some excuse not to do it. It's stupid--I choose to be alone, and then I feel sad about being alone, but I don't do anything about it.
>>5631183
What social things are you choosing not to do?
>>5630920
Don't they say at least 8?
>>5631024
I don't think so. It's more that it's an interesting aspect, but not the first/only, right?
>>5631295
It just means there's more likelihood of you being the kind of thing I want to fuck.
I'm not even sure how you can think about a person without thinking about all the different stuff about them. It seems foreign, weird, and unhuman to do so.
>>5630920
I had a bunch of complications with my top surgery and wouldn't have wanted to have another surgery until at least 6-8 months post-op. I'm 10 months post-op now and definitely ready for another surgery; I'm starting to plan to have a hysto sometime in the next couple of months.
You shouldn't assume that your recovery will go quickly or smoothly. Give yourself enough time to totally and completely recover from everything that might happen.
Is it better to get top surgery first and then work out my chest or the other way around? Like, will it end up looking the same if I do it one way or another?
>>5630438
really sorry about this anon, I hope it works out
>>5631547
I don't think it really matters too much. I would recommend working out your core pre-op, though. You really need core strength to be able to get around and do basic tasks when you're in t-rex mode post-op.
Do you guys like bondage?
>>5631909
I've never really done any but I fantasize sometimes about tying a guy up before fucking him :3
>”You can come out when I'm dead!”
My father was shocked and angry when I came out at first, but he's supportive and trying to help. Still, I sort of regret it because it's made things awkward between us. But I don't think I could take care of everything on my own if I didn't. I'm so anxious I want to curl up back in the closet and die.
>>5631999
Your feelings are totally normal. I wanted to curl up back in the closet and die every single time I came out to someone. Not just family, but friends, coworkers, anyone. It just made me feel so ashamed and I felt so bad for putting people through such a weird and fucked-up and awkward thing.
But the awkwardness gets better. Not only as the person you came out to gets more used to the reality of your transition, but as you start feeling more secure and confident in yourself too.
I came out to my supportive but awkward parents over two years ago. It took them awhile but they did get over that hump of weirdness, and things are mostly normal now. It's common to feel anxious and awkward and ashamed after coming out. Just give it time anon.
>>5631197
Anything...I joined some Meetup.com groups (I don't know if that's lame or not, they looked pretty fun though), but I haven't gone to any activities. I've thought about taking some non-credit community college classes, but I'm too broke for that right now. I want to get a dog because I think it would help with my social anxiety and I might connect with other dog owners/lovers, but I can't afford a dog right now either.
I'm not even sure what else people my age (27) do, aside from, apparently, watching Netflix and chilling. My only friend is my ex, and he's seven years older than I am, so I literally know no one my own age. I left college after one semester and didn't stay in touch with anyone I knew from high school or that one semester of college. Instead of having a job where I interact with other people, the only work I've done for years has been online, from home, and completely solo (e.g., I'm currently doing transcription editing and subtitling). At this point, I'm not even sure if I want friends. I'm so used to being a loner that it seems like more trouble than it's worth.
Now that I've started transitioning, I feel like even more of a freak than I was before because I'm in this awkward "Ugly Duckling" phase. Well, I'm hoping it's just a phase. I might just be perma-ugly. Anyway, I can't even make myself go down to the fucking fitness room in my apartment building because I'm so self-conscious and anxious about being around other people.
Plus, since starting T, I sweat like a motherfucker. I take a walk outside in the cold and by the end, sweat is literally dripping off of me. I've always been scared that I smelled bad, and now I'm constantly paranoid that I reek of sweat even though I'm always showering and applying deodorant.
Holy fucking neuroses, Batman. If I sound like a mess, it's because I am a mess.
>>5631558
Thank you, anon.
>>5632201
Meetup isn't lame Anon, I joined a bunch of groups and it's very easy to drop in and out, whatever you're comfortable with.
On another note, Freetom's having another sale so I got a Pack N Play I'd had my eye on for a while. I really want to convert it to an STP as well but not 100% sure how to do that. Any tips?
>>5631444
>>5631286
Thanks, I've been having some really bad cramping some nights that keeps me from sleeping and spotting almost daily since starting T. I'm about 15 months on now and still getting small amounts even though my bloodwork says I'm in typical male range so I'm probably being a bit hasty about wanting everything out ASAP. My doctor hasn't really wanted to do anything on it other than adjust my dosage but it's persisted through that. Just wanted some other guys opinions on wait time. Waiting until august or later for a hysto will suck, but if needs be suppose I can tough it out.
>>5632201
Sweating like a motherfucker won't change. Some guys just sweat like buckets any time they do anything. Luckily, if you sweat a lot, your pores are clean, so it doesn't smell bad. Just use deodorant on all hairy areas.
I'm 26 and what I do is pretty context dependent. Most people my/our age have set up families and are doing family stuff, and others are pretty heavy into the 'meeting people to potentially set up a family with' scene like nightclubs, drinks with friends, etc.
Other than getting laid and working, it's usually interest specific. I'm interested in philosophy, interesting people, games of various stripes, meeting friends in nice spots, fighting of various stripes, and reading/writing, so I tend to meet people at events of that kind. Also most people meet new people through existing friends - if you don't have existing friends due to social isolation (tip: depression causes you to become socially isolated, so do some anti-depression stuff - exercises, activities, eating habits, sunlight - the meds though, are hardcore and very hit and miss - avoid them if you can at all) then it's understandable that you can find difficulty making more. If you're socially awkward/self-conscious, it makes it harder too.
You come off as personable here - it's likely that if you start putting yourself out there with people and actually talking to them, they'll think the same thing, and you'll end up making some friends to hang out with. It's not highly formal or super important to most people, they just feel better when around other people they like, so they try to organize their lives to end up with that happening.
I'm gonna be a huge hypocrite here and say avoid dating until you're re-socialized again, because there are a lot of predators out there (especially, but not exclusively, in the gay community - and despite popular beliefs, a lot of them are female) who capitalize on people with low self-esteem/inexperienced people who they can abuse.
>>5633206
(cont) Doesn't mean every person who might want to date you is like that, but you sound like you might fit a profile a lot of predators target. I personally end up dating a lot of vulnerable people because I like to feel like I am protecting/teaching/helping people, so that's a big draw for me, and why it's a bit hypocritical of me to say to avoid dating until you've made friends again etc.
Also add people from this thread on skype. And talk to them, preferably with actual voice. It'll help train your mannerisms to be more male, and they'll likely have sympathy for your situation (being from 4chan, and ftm), which will help your self esteem and cause you not to panic. All of which will help retrain you for socialization.
In the end, just biting the bullet and talking to someone even if you feel they'll shoot you down in flames is what makes friends. I do that a lot, and sometimes people aren't interested, but most of the time they are - even if it's just a quick chat where you both verify you're not really that compatible as either friends or potential lovers, most people are gratified that you put in the effort at least.
Bottom/switch ftms of any sexuality (because girlfriends can peg too and all), how okay are you with using your front hole for penetration during sex?
>>5633261
>bought clothes yesterday
>t-shirt was a bit clingier than I expected
>binder shape is noticable underneath
>neck hole wide enough for some binder visibility
>chest is, or at least feels, very noticable anyway
>mfw
I wish I could wear more fitted clothes, it just accentuates my shitty body shape but I get bored of looking like a shabby homeless person...
>>5634451
At this point I've stopped buying all that many clothes i love, and largely pick them based on if they fit the silhouette i'm going for
it works in a janky kind of way
>in car with friends
>Reflections from Mulan comes on the stereo
>mindlessly singing along
>suddenly realise what I'm saying
>>5635809
>tfw cis twink manlet
>tfw no bigspoon ftm bf
W-Where do I find you guys?
>>5637886
How come you want a ftm specifically? Just curious.
>>5637886
I similarly have this question.
>>5638795
why is this a weird preference? i dont understand. doesnt seem very different than a lot of preferences people have when dating/hooking up.
>>5638905
Cause FTM just want to be seen as dudes. People interested in dating ftm rather than just a guy are likely to be interested in the guy not being a guy but rather being female or 'ftm' in some way.
If someone prefers ftm over guys, that usually means they like the female stuff that ftm don't like or want to have. It's like mtf aren't keen on the guys that are into their dicks. Or they have some andro something when again, ftm don't want to be andro (usually), they want to be male.
>>5637886
>tfw no manlet bf to protect from things that go bump in the night
;_;
>>5639043
Is that one of the things that go bump in the night, a guy doing the weirdest fucking weight training/modern art i've ever seen.
>>5634451
this is the struggle. i'm still girlmode and my options are look like a girl or look like a bag person. i just want a nice suit.
>>5639066
The third option is look like a butch lesbian. Honestly, it's probably not the worst choice. At least you get to look good and not be feminine.
>>5639072
I like long hair and nail polish though. They are nice features even if they are considered feminine. If I were guymode I could still rock them. It's my body that I have a problem with.
Not only that, but I hate being thought of as a lesbian. I'm not dating anymore, because I like women, but my last relationship was with a man. When I come out it will be as trans, not gay.
>>5639136
Cis guy with long hair here. Hair that is shoulder length fabio cut on a masc, muscly, loses-shirt-whenever-possible guy is a masculine feature - longer than that, it's feminizing as hell. If I have my hair out, and I hit on girls, they are super surprised that I am not gay. Nail polish is similarly a 'gay guy' thing at best. Not saying you can't make it work - hell, i'm there with you - but it's definitely hard to be seen as a guy interested in girls if you have long hair or nail polish on.
>>5639043
i'm beyond manlet
or should i say beneath
im fucking short
>>5639407
How short. And are you that cis manlet from earlier or a ftm.
>>5639407
Iktf bro 5'3" here
>buy work uniform (scrubs) in xs short
>still have to hem them 4 inches
They don't have enough pockets either but they were on sale
I'm staying in a hostel right now and I had top surgery a few months ago now and I got to tell ya
being able to just walk around topless is the best
and no one has even looked at me weird
top surgery is the dream, boys
>>5641733
That sounds great. I want to kill myself after finding out that my insurance will never cover my top surgery, and there's no way I'll be able to afford to pay for it out of pocket. I'm going to be a man with breasts. I'm going to have to wear this fucking binder forever. Goddamnit.
>>5641799
Get Credit Care. It's a health specific 'credit card' that's like a loan so you can pay back in installments. If you have a job you should have no problem qualifying and it covers trans stuff. A lot of doctors take it.
Also see if they will code it as gynecomastia, it's a loophole sometimes, especially if all your stuff is switched to male.
will she ever love me lads
How long do you have to rest after top surgery? Like, the absolute minimum.
My insurance says they will cover it but I only got a year and a half left since I'm under my dad's insurance. Problem is I'm poor as fuck and work a full time, sometimes overtime 6 day a week job that is very physically demanding with lifting and running around.
>>5642116
6 weeks no heavy lifting.
how heavy is your lifting?
>>5642133
Goddamn thats a long time.
It depends whatever needs to be lifted. Logs, rocks, furniture, giant loose dogs, tractor loaders, boxes of junk, etc. I'm not very strong but I do all grunt work. I might be able to switch to housekeeping for a little while, at worst they have to lift a mattress or a box of paper towels. I can't afford not to work for 6 weeks.
>>5639771
Cis manlet here
That guy isn't me
>>5641929
all i can say is that anyone considering Credit Care should do a lot of research before going ahead with it. it's not just magic money for surgery. the loan terms favor their company, their interest rates are insane, and unless you pay them back very quickly it will be much much much more expensive to go through Care Credit then it would be to pay out of pocket.
>>5642850
why don't you like cis guys? are you only attracted to pre-T trans guys? because i hate to break it to you but most post-transition trans men look and act just like cis men...
donate your boobs to me pls
Does there seem to be a preponderance of ftms that prefer guys in bed over girls to anyone besides me?
>>5643981
it might be like that on 4chan but it's not really true in general. most of trans men i know or talk to or see online used to be lesbians and identify as straight or "bi" (in quotes because they still almost always only date women).
I was wondering why the guys in this thread seemed so wary, but after lurking here a bit, seems legit. Guys interested in girls totally come after ftm because they're after 'tomboys' or 'girls who top' or whatever. That's goddamn horrifying.
>>5642210
You could try getting a place in the country/staying with someone while you recover from the surgery, and sublet your place/room through that period. Staying with people/family while you recover from surgery is totally legit, and places to live in in the country/boonies are super cheap. If you can take a medical leave from your work without just being replaced, it could work out without costing you much.
The gynecomastia is a good tip, especially if you can get your gender legally changed.
>>5643981
In this thread, sure.
IRL, less so.
Also, we know next to nothing about the connection between transgender and sexual attraction, except that the 'they are failed women transitioning to get guys/girls' argument is hilarious.
>>5643915
>why don't you like cis guys?
Don't like the dick and balls so I suppose pre-T trans guys
>act just like cis men...
This one doesn't bother
>look like cis men
This one wouldn't be too bad if they were boyish and no facial hair rather than ruggedly masculine
>>5644070
T doesn't make us grow a dick and balls bro...
>>5644119
I'm pretty sure I've seen surgery to put a fake dick on ftm. It wasn't exactly realistic looking.
If a ftm didn't get that surgery I wouldn't mind assuming they fit the other things I said.
>>5644127
So it's 'not too bad' if ftm are feminine/boyish and use their girl parts.
This hurts my brain and i'm a cis guy.
>>5644161
I'm obligated to find someone 10/10 to consider a relationship with them?
Also I'd like being pegged, but I'd prefer a strap on to ugly hot dog dick. Would also like to give a rim job and do anal so no to the girl parts question. Although I would enjoy that too
>>5644127
FTMs sometimes opt for a procedure called phalloplasty. it's not a "fake dick," it's a phallus created from a skin graft taken from elsewhere in the body. i've seen shitty-looking phallos and i've seen amazing-looking phallos... it all depends on the individual, the surgeon, etc. but it's a very uncommon surgery because it's really expensive, really complicated, and has a lot of drawbacks. not many surgeons do it and not many FTMs get it done.
(there's also metoidioplasty, which is a different kind of genital surgery where they create a micropenis out of the clitoris and a scrotum out of the labia.)
anyway, you seem really underinformed about transition for FTMs, you should learn more about us before you try to sleep with one of us honestly.
>>5644175
You're not 'obligated' to do anything, but neither is anyone 'obligated' to date someone who pretty clearly wants a top girlfriend, and not a boyfriend.
>>5644191
This post makes me want to cry. I hate getting reminded...I wish there was another option.
>>5644288
do you wanna talk it out anon. i'm planning phallo myself and i know it's shit on all over the interwebs but i really think a lot of the negativity is unwarranted or misguided and most people just don't really understand what's available these days bc they've never actually researched it. what is it about my post made you upset in particular?
>>5644452
I guess I just can't imagine having that large of a skin graft taken from wherever, and the idea of any sort of "cutting" involving the clit makes me cringe. I've seen too many pictures of the huge area that's left behind after the skin graft is taken, and of end results that look like one of those creepy "water snake" toys (e.g., http://www.officeplayground.com/Water-Snakes-C225.aspx). I might consider metoidioplasty eventually (I haven't been on T for nearly long enough), but since the most you'll ever get is a "micropenis," I don't know if I'll end up feeling like the surgery is worth it. I don't have the money, anyway, so it's moot.
I have seen some really good phalloplasty results, too, though.
>>5638972
MTFs are creeped out by people going after their dick cause the people who do it are really creepy about it and usually cis. trans people tend to go after each other tho cause it's something you have in common, and having things in common is nice.
either way, your partner will always like stuff about you that you dislike or are just apathetic to, and it won't really ever affect you, so that seems like a moot point to me. self-hating isn't healthy anyway
>>5639136
>I hate being thought of as a lesbian
gee im so surprised youre trans
>>5641733
im just gonna move somewhere chill like france
>>5644054
actually i've known several girls who transitioned to get GFs, it's actually really common.
it's not their only reason sure, but a significant part
>>5644191
its a fake dick bro lmao
>>5645025
The argument is that all trans transition due to that or 'fetishes', and dysphoria doesn't exist/is an excuse. It's a pretty common belief (you'll see it posted all over lgbt).
Which has been clinically disproven.
>>5642114
Yes with a small chance tho
>>5645034
don't lmao at my one chance at happiness
>>5645272
Are you being hyperbolic here or serious? I can't tell.
>>5645307
I wasn't the guy you were talking to,
i was just kidding tho, i'd never get phallo
>>5645348
I'm not the lmao guy. Either of the those guys. Just curious if you were serious about having that much dick dysphoria.
Also that fucking video man. Christ. Got me right in the unconscious-fears-I-didn't-know-I-had.
>>5645357
>Just curious if you were serious about having that much dick dysphoria
yes i am, it's genuinely the source of all my misery. phallo isn't gonna fix it though
>>5645571
Like.. really? I'm trying to wrap my mind around that, but I keep coming up blank.
I'm falling in love with someone and I really can't emotionally afford to be right now.
Kill me.
>>5645585
You're ftm and confused, why a man would want a dick?
>>5645610
>it's genuinely the source of all my misery.
That's the bit i'm choking on. ALL of someone's misery? Like.. all of it? If that's literally all the misery you're feeling you're like otherwise quite happy or that misery is such a gargantuan beast I don't even want to acknowledge it could exist, much less does.
>>5645594
Why
Tell us more about this.
>>5645614
that's what transsexuality is, welcome to the board
>>5645614
not having a dick is one of the most gun wrenchingly painful experiences i've ever felt
>>5645652
*gut
>>5645616
Not much to tell. Just disgustingly insecure with myself due to being pre-T on top of other issues I have. I don't feel like I'm capable of properly loving another person when I haven't a grain of self respect or love.
That said, I'll probably never find another person like this in my life who loves, cares and respects me this way and I'd be a mother fucking moron to let it pass me by because of some insecurities that can be fixed with time and patience.
Why the fuck is everything so mind numbing.
>>5645772
Well honestly if you've identified the problems, solving them is just a matter of time and effort. And it sounds like you've identified the problems. It's when you don't know what the problems are that everything tends to explode.
Just don't forget that this person loves you and wants to be around you, and even if you can't care about yourself, you can are about them caring about you? Doing stuff purely for others isn't ideal, but as long as you're aware of that, it can be a temporary solution.
>>5645772
Damn, I know those feels.
>>5645009
Shut up and get your angry lesbian "butch flight" TERFy bullshit out of this thread. Of course we don't want to be seen as lesbians, we're not women in the first goddamn place. FYI we also hate being seen as straight girls, but I know that doesn't support your horseshit opinions about lesbophobia-induced transgenderism, so feel free to ignore that little fact.
>ftmg boring quiet edition
>>5646183
It's because the bird picture is stupid and uninviting
>>5646183
You must be new
>>5646208
no u
>>5644958
you're not alone with your feelings about scars, that's why there are other options besides RFF that leave less or at least less visible scarring. do some research about ALT phallo, MLD phallo, or the various kinds of abdominal flap phallos. there are tradeoffs to the different procedures but there are options.
also, usually when you see photos of someone's arm scar they're very early on in the healing process. i've seen photos of people 8-10 years out from graft harvest and it looks much more normal than most other photos you see. also when i was a teenager i knew someone who had a graft taken from his arm as a kid to treat a burn or smth, and it just looked like an area of slightly pale scar tissue.
idk, personally i don't care about the scar, i think it's pretty badass honestly.
>>5645357
i'm the one who originally posted about phallo and for me it's not that it would be my "one chance at happiness", more like i can't imagine living the rest of my life with incorrect genitals. i just feel so weird and incomplete because of my lack of dick. i'm totally stealth and otherwise post-transition, i look like a man except for that one part and it's really a shitty feel. i love sex but i can't even take my underwear off in bed because dysphoria. i just want to be able to have a normal life as a guy and for me that's not going to happen without phallo. i don't care that it won't be a perfect penis, i don't need it to be perfect, i just need it to exist.
>>5645772
you're looking at this the wrong way, anon.
Just ride it out and see what happens. be chill. If you fuck up, so what, it's a learning experience, right? But it's better to just see where it goes (if they are interested) than regret never trying it.
>>5646229
wow, are you me?
Also, I think phallo gets a really bad rep because people see stage one pictures fresh out of surgery and it's obviously totally raw looking, and nor is it finished. If you look at some from a little down the line they look half decent, but I don't care what it looks like desu, I just want a dick. frankendick is better than no dick, fuck you, buck angel, imo
>>5646420
yeah i think people forget this when looking at phallo pictures. 99% of the ones you see floating around publicly on the internet were taken within 6 months of surgery. lots of them were taken within the first few weeks by the surgeons themselves. it takes a really long time for stuff to heal, for swelling to totally disappear, etc... of COURSE a freshly post-op phallo is going to look wonky and weird.
i've seen photos of phallos that look totally cis, no exaggeration at all. i've talked to people who have had sex partners who had no idea that they hadn't been born with their dick. but these kinds of photos/people can't just be found by googling. dicks are really private and most of people who get phallo are deep stealth, of course that shit isn't going to just be floating around on the internet where anyone can find it.
>>5639072
It is when you're in an area with a shit ton of butch lesbians
you even look in one's direction they think you're a fellow dyke
>>5646474
Exactly, I've only really seen pics of fresh post-op ones. Plus I think the cost just puts people off anyway so they just never really consider it to be a thing.
>>5646474
You're right about it not being an exaggeration.
That's an outright lie.
If not, then post those pics. I'm curious.
>>5641733
Oh man, thinking about having that makes my chest ache. The freedom to not bother putting a shirt on if I'm not leaving the house. I wanna wear tanks. I'll take the under-scars, I'll wear them with honour. God fucking damn.
I need pics of attractive passing ftm to prove a point to someone. Anyone got any?
>>5647322
i'm not going to repost photos that were shared to secret, locked yahoo groups for phalloplasty patients. if you're interested because you're FTM and are considering phallo, go join the groups yourself. if not, fuck off.
>>5647443
there's a super attractive one nicknamed box destroyer, but i don't have any pics of him.
>>5647443
the obvious answers would be to google Balian Buschbaum or Aydian Dowling
highest-scoring FTM post on /r/transtimelines: http://imgur.com/a/zGCBw
second-highest:
http://imgur.com/a/u0ZMB
most dudes on the first couple pages of search results on reddit look great. also a dude posted this today: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9ZXvmwQxGE
>>5647485
Too bad box destroyer became a faggot. I remember seeing pictures of him unironically wearing fkh8 t-shirts.
>>5647491
>http://imgur.com/a/u0ZMB
he would pass if not for that tattoo.
Is 30 too late to transition?
>>5647603
No. Next question.
>>5647603
If youre ftm it's literally never too late
>>5647616
Good to know. I'm planning on enlisting and I'm not sure I could do that if was transitioning or already transitioned so I'm waiting it out.
>>5630565
Haven't read the rest of the thread, but I'm in a similar situation. I'm 27, living with parents, and I'm now seeing my therapist again for who knows how long, so I can get too surgery this year.
My parents aren't stopping me, but they remind me that they can't understand why this is important. And tell me to just be a tomboy because that's really all I'll ever be. The guilt trips I get are insane. I wonder, when I'm approved for surgery, who's going to be willing to pick me up from the hospital.
I'm considering metoidioplasty or whatever it's called, later down the road. But I need two therapist to consent to it.
>>5647443
One more in case they try to pull "but angles"
>>5647603
Nope. Get on it.
>tfw 5'3
>>5647640
wow, please tell me this dude is gay. I would fuck him into next year.
>>5647663
There are at least two people that hang here shorter than you so it ain't that bad. If anyone questions, say you've got Italian ancestry and drew the genetic short straw.
>>5647663
I'm 5'3" and it's really not that bad bro. My family is Sicilian and my dad and my brother are only an inch or two taller than me. It happens, your life is not over, you'll still pass, etc
Hey guys, does anyone here work in education? I'm worried I could lose my job as a teacher for being trans.
>>5647710
Not him, but I'm 5'3" and my mom's like 4'10" and my dad's maybe 5'8", so I tend to just tell people I never had a chance. they never question it, at least not to my face anyway.
>>5647863
>someone notices how short I am
>"nah, i'm just far away"
>everyone laughs
>successful deflection
How have your interactions with mtfs been? Mostly positive or mostly negative?
>>5647938
My GP is mtf, I quite like her. Other than that I've only briefly greeted a couple others. No opinion on them, other than they were polite.
>>5647938
I got hit on by a hon in a gay bar.
She thought I was cis, because she was obviously into the cute twink and I was pretty twinky back then - I don't even think I'd started T, or been on long at least.
Anyway, she kept trying to run her hand down to my 'balls' and I was like lol stop
She fingered my ass a bit and I did kiss her and it was probably the most hilarious night of my life.
Truth be told, I don't think I've ever, knowingly, met another mtf in person since.
>>5647938
My best friend is mtf. I have another less-close mtf friend, and have met/interacted with tons of trans women at LGBT events and centers and whatnot. My experiences with them have been very positive, I don't think I've ever been irked by a trans woman IRL.
>>5648000
Yipes. Well that's one for your memoir.
>>5647670
i think hes bi. his tumblr is coolben94.tumblr.com
>>5647737
are you determined to work with kids? trans community college professors seem to have an easier time finding jobs ime. it also depends a lot on where you live, i think.
>>5648294
omg... he lives in my city... dokidoki
the fact this starts with a "(excuse the tumblr, it's truscum)" makes me fucking die inside
>>5648328
oh noo apparently he moved. my heart is broken, our thirty-second imaginary romance was so deep and meaningful
Shit. I got frivolous with crap food and gained about 5 kg/11 lbs and my binder got tighter and now my ribs and back hurt.
Don't do it guys. Eat your salads. Drink your water.
>>5648366
It means that even though the information is posted through the hated and cancer-riddled site tumblr, it is excusable due to the blogger's nature being that of 'truscum' i.e. One who believes trans requires dysphoria and is a medical issue, not a fashion choice i.e. 'tuucute'
>>5648478
What the hell is "tuucute"
Don't make me delve into this stuff, man.
>>5648605
>anyone can be trans if they want to be
>>5648366
How do you mean?
why is this the only consistently sane thread on /lgbt/? You'd think taking testosterone would give people anger issues and make them irrational and crazy.
>>5649165
That's not how it works.
Hell if anything, estrogen makes us feel nuts. Shit is like poison to a transguy.
>>5648366
Truscum is a term tumblrites use to describe people who think being trans isn't a choice, m80.
>>5647443
>>5649165
>irrational and crazy
you're thinking of estrogen
Why are ftms so shit to mtfs?
>>5649301
brosb4hoes
>>5649165
>You'd think taking testosterone would give people anger issues and make them irrational and crazy.
Not really unless you don't know anything about hrt or hormones in general but okay :^)
Hormones are p crazy though, I was reading about how one theory about how mtfs are created is that they have too much testosterone and when it floods the brain it's turned into an estrogen by an enzyme. These high levels of testosterone (and in response estrogen) during development somehow this causes dysphoria / le memeing "female" brain.
>>5649277
Damn. I should stand next to tiny children in every photo I take.
>>5649186
His point is that you're dragging tumblr slapfighting into the thread in every OP. Why would you do that. Just ignore it in every possible way.
>>5649397
It's less a choice, and more a lifestyle
Back in middle school I wore masculine shirts comfortably. Now my breasts have grown enough that they're too obvious to me and I feel like a tryhard tomboy. Makes me wish I accepted being trans sooner.
You guys under C-size are lucky. At least you can bind easier. The methods I tried so far barely make a difference worth the annoyance.
>>5649671
Except that almost never happens because people don't read the OP. Welcome, newfriend.
>>5649671
That's been in the OP for fucking ever. Only tumblrshits will have a problem with it, anyone else will ignore it and move on (like they should also do with tumblr crap) like a normal person.
>>5650026
Oh quit your bitching.
>>5649301
I was sympathetic for mtfs until they treated me like shit. Now I just kind of feel nothing towards them.
>>5650045
Also on a completely unrelated note, we should fuck.
>having casual conversation with cis friend (who knows me as female)
>joking about teen boys being stoked about their first shitty moustache
>mid-way through, get intense pit in stomach from realizing that i never felt that as a teen and might never as an adult if things dont go to plan
;_;
thinking about the "guy things all of us guys went through" things i missed out on in childhood kills me
>>5650385
Most teenage stuff sucks. For girls or guys. There's always that 'rosy glow of the past' stuff, but it's not that great for anyone.
What is stopping you getting on T and getting stoked about your shitty teenstache?
(also sage dammit)
casually lurks, this thread both makes me feel better and kind of the same general bad feeling about being the whole ftm thing.
> cool pro is i'm like six feet tall
> real shitty con is i'm basically unstable / allergic to most T and after 3 years almost the only thing i got going is the voice drop, shit
> double con is dudes usually chase me because i'm 'exotic' or something, 4/10
i was hoping for some advice here:
>been going to this weird charter homestudy school for about two years
>wasnt out or presenting male last year so im known at the school as female
>i now live full time as male except for school
>dont know how to "come out" at school bc most kids there are only there bc of religion and being sheltered
>dont know what to do about bathrooms
>i hate that its the one place i am known as female i want to be able to live 100% as male
>its a really small school theres only about 50 kids there at a time for on-site classes so i cant just find new people since everyone basically knows everyone
>i only go twice a week so its somewhat bearable but it fucks with me
does anyone know the easiest way to "come out" or just start living as male there. i dont want to ditch since its the only school system that has worked for my mental stuff and im already behind on graduating.
>>5650994
How long do you have to be there? If you're that worried about coming out or that apprehensive, maybe you can just live it out there as your final chapter presenting as female. It's not ideal or easy but you're already doing it.
Otherwise just bite the bullet and come out. There isn't really an easy way, not everyone will react positively and not everyone will react negatively. If you wear feminine or different clothes, makeup, and don't bind, just gradually undo these things and present yourself as you normally would. If people question it, use that as your opportunity to be honest and explain why. Tell the people you're closest with first, and those who need to know, and let the rest come naturally.
I wish you the best of luck man, I wish I had the stones to come out.
>>5650994
Well, if you can't bite the bullet and come out, just start dressing like a guy and going to school and act like it's nothing weird. Use the female bathrooms, but otherwise just wear the same clothes and actions as you do outside school.
The topic will either come up naturally without you having to do some big tumblr declaration, or you'll feel more comfortable until you finish and can ditch the whole thing. Win/win.
>>5651036
>bite the bullet
>same advice
Are you my clone
>>5651043
I don't think so, you beat me with the
>tumblr declaration
phrase.
Made me lol quiet nicely.
>>5651036
>>5651037
yeah that was basically game plan. i already act/dress the same as i do outside school but i get really hotheaded when referred to as "she" or anything feminine since my masculinity is so fragile. one of my teachers who im pretty close with knows about it since i tell her everything sinced she really helped me back in my suicidal phase would probably start the pronoun ball rolling. i guess im just being really irrational since i actually have to make an effort at school to be treated as male whereas everywhere else has been a breeze i just sent a text saying "this is my name now and please refer to me as male thank you" to everyone and stopped talking to those who were disrespectful. anyways, im rambling. thanks for your advice i think im gonna man up, or bite the bullet, and declare my masculinity.
>>5651116
If you're not my clone, then we have to date.
>>5649301
Look at all the shit mtfs say about us
>>5651166
Yeah okay, just try to be low key about it, and don't let people get on your nerves if they're ignorant about it. You're probably gonna see attacks where there aren't any, and even if there are some, you should probs just ignore them. Nothing gets better when you engage bullies or assholes, unless you're good in a fight and they start to mess with you physically and you just put them on their ass and keep walking, which induces enough healthy fear that they leave you alone, but not enough that they feel compelled to take revenge.
>>5649301
They aren't, you're just this one mad hon who drive-bys the thread every thread or so for literally no reason.
>>5650992
Allergic to T? Explain. Also, explain this 'exotic' thing. Because you're tall?
>>5647938
I had an mtf gf who was crazy...
So positive?
>>5650992
What's your dosage? I'm pretty tall myself and my doctor did say that my levels were pretty low, said it might be because I'm taller than most ftms so they upped my dosage. Could have something to do with your situation?
My boyfriend has decided he’s okay with me transitioning and I’m through the fucking roof with excitement.
He wants me to shave which might get annoying if I turn out particularly hairy, but he's chill with top surgery, fat redistribution, increased musculature etc. Fuck yes.
Best orgasms are had by dry humping and pretending you have a dick imo, it's just a shame it takes so long to get worked up that way.
>>5647938
The only other trans person I've knowingly interacted with IRL is my own sibling. MtF. We're each about half of a functioning person. Our relationship is pretty great, but n=1, so...
On here, I've gotten randomly yelled at by a few MtFs (or people pretending to be MtFs) with huge chips on their shoulders and the tendency to make ridiculous assumptions, but I'd say most of my interactions have been positive.
>>5647938
One of my close friends is MtF and I've interacted with a few at LGBT groups that have been positive encounters.
However, I did have a MtF gf and she was a nightmare and so were most of her other trans friends (some were FtMs) so I assume that entire crowd was just full of bad apples. She was incredibly manipulative and attempted to pressure me into sex (she wanted P in V and I was definitely not okay with that which she knew) and would throw fits in public if I didn't do something she wanted (like making out in public when she knows I am extremely opposed to PDA).
I've also met some really rude and catty MtFs through trans groups.
Overall my experience has been more negative than positive but the nicer trans women I've met outshine the negative ones with their positivity. But no one can erase the horror that was my ex.
>>5651328
>>5652181
they can't figure out how to regulate my levels properly. i'm either 200, or 1100. no in between. was ok on a topical one for about 7 months before it unexpectedly failed on me, nobody knew why. allergic to patches and tablets, full blown internal/external hives. theyre trying to switch me to injections to regulate the levels better but vasovagal response is kind of a problem, but that's literally my last option outside of the experimental implant ones. yikes.
as for the exotic comment, i got it for a number of reasons, being taller than nearly every dude that hits on me, being a tall blond twink ftm that is specifcally gay usually gets their goat
frankly it's mostly weird daddies and chasers that i get and it's not flattering, again 4/10 that guys like me, but usually end up for all the wrong reasons
So if one is attracted to transguys and wants a transguy boyfriend but has no experience or background in the matter what do?
>>5653579
Same things you do if you want to date any other guy. Just don't stick your fingers in his pussy without permission.
>>5653724
>Just don't stick your fingers in his pussy without permission.
This reminds me of the time somebody asked how to compliment an ftm without offending them, and some anons said shit like
>you have such handsome breasts!
>that's the most masculine vagina I've ever seen!
It was funny as fuck. You guys never fail to make me laugh.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3427831/Beauty-queen-abandons-Miss-America-dreams-live-man.html
You guys seen this? :D
>>5654114
Oddly he looked more mtf when presenting female.
>>5654128
If you don't know a ftm irl already then you're probably never going to find one, nobody posts that shit online unless they live in some faraway Liberalhaven where they don't have to worry about being Brandon Teena'd.
>>5649352
i wonder what that says about ftms then...i thought we were also exposed to more testosterone in the womb?
>>5654323
I bathed in estrogen for an extra three weeks before I was finally pried out of my mother via C-section. Apparently, I was born with enlarged breasts from over-exposure to her hormones. I'm really curious how that impacted my development.
>>5654323
excess testosterone wouldn't be processed the same way
I'm gonna tell my doctor I might be trans this week. Putting it here in writing so you guys can tell me I'm a little bitch if I wuss out.
>>5655078
DO IT NIGGER
>>5654323
That's what I remember too, I don't think the textbook I was reading mentioned it. What I understand is that extra testosterone in a female is above the general female levels and sometimes up into the male levels (what would supposedly make someone ftm), but usually not so high as to trigger that enzyme (aromatase).
Basically think of it in the same way that ftm's take testosterone without experiencing any feminising side effects but if a male takes too much extra like with doping it can actually cause some degree of feminization including breast tissue growth. Some body builders who know what they're doing and roid also take a drug that works counter to the enzyme that will convert the extra test back into estrogen because growing bitch titties isn't aesthetic.
>>5654103
Oh shit that's fucking funny
I was that guy having prolonged period problems from a few threads back
>my mom won't take me to a gyno
>thinks just fucking with birth control pills is gonna help the problem which I doubt it will
>I can't bare to even take a piss or bathe without getting disgusted by my body
>too pussy to come out
>>5656339
>guy
>going to gyno
Nope
>>5656485
>vagina haver
>going to gyno
seems pretty sensible...
>>5653048
Combined, our power will be truly unstoppable.
>>5656485
Wasn't aware that going to a gyno invalidates the fact I'm a trans guy but alright
>>5656485
Pffffhah. Real men go to see the appropriate specialist in a field, and respect the training to learn whatever they are specialized in. Real men also confront the realities of a situation, and don't hide behind prevarications and bullshit. You just come across as a whiny bitch sperging about some imaginary conditions to being a man that fit you so you can say you're good and other people are bad. Basic lack of self-confidence, bro, needing to tear down others to feel good.
Be less of a bitch, do some work on that.
>>5656564
Not the guy you responded to, but fucking kek, are you serious?
>>5656654
>kek
Am I serious that going 'omg mans don't see gynos lol' is the mark of a sperglord with issues? Yeah.
Saying being a man means you don't go and see doctors about medical conditions indicates you are a fucktard and should improve yourself or just stop talking to people full stop. Putting random conditions on being male due to insecurity and trying to use that to insult others is asshole-tier behaviour. Pretty much the opposite of the male ideal in every way.
>>5656770
I'm just saying that you've come up with quite the argument for a five worded post. Maybe anon was explaining his fear of going to a gyno because of being male, hence 'nope'. He could've meant a couple different things. Calm down.
>>5656814
>>guy
>>going to gyno
>Nope
Are you new? He's saying guys don't go to gynocologists, ergo, anyone who does, isn't a guy. I mean, do you really not get that.
Do other guys have AGP?
It's part of how I realized I was male, everything feminine I liked to do I only liked because I got a sexual thrill from being seen as a girl. The only time I was okay with my body was when I was turned on by it.
>>5656884
I understand that. I'm telling you that if they are, you just fed them with that long ass post. I'm sure everyone else in the thread agrees with you, anon. Chill
>>5656986
post nudes
>>5656986
no. but i do get turned on if i shave my legs
>just turned 19 and I've never kissed a guy
SUICIDE
U
I
C
I
D
E
>>5657284
You know there's like, whole reams of guys out there. Lots of them in fact.
Not that it matters one way or another, but let's say I:
>have crippling physical dysphoria and bind, only suicidal over it once every few months though, not often
>don't go on HRT/SRS because muh family, muh career, etc
>don't "identify as male" or come out as anything
Trans or something else?
>>5657467
probably trans.
You've not really given a lot of information there though desu.
Maybe see a proper therapist tho
>>5657470
Yeah alright. Have one, the therapist thinks I should transition. Everything is fine
>>5657478
you really think there's no chance of being accepted should you come out?
>>5657491
Eh. Realistically it would probably go like:
>little bro forbidden from talking to me until he turns 18, then he may or may not want to
>mom cries a lot, disowns me, may come around in another 10 years
>little sister angry but keeps in contact, eventually warms up, may talk my mom into talking to me again
>(lesbian) girlfriend of 2 years cries a lot and breaks it off once T changes kick in. (she knows about muh struggle so it wouldn't be a huge surprise, she'd be sad though)
Given that I don't really care if people see me as male or not it makes more sense to deal with the dysphoria. I always feel crippingly out of place and awkward and I can't stand looking at my body but like, I'm only very rarely suicidal over it so w/e. I'm in my early twenties so I figure it's not getting any worse if I've lived through it this long so I can just deal.
>>5657507
Your misery will reach out and infect the ones closest to you whether you want it to or not. And if you can't deal with dysphoria in some way so it goes away, people report it getting worse over time.
Living for others is fine but only if you can actually manage it. It is harder than you might think. Your mind's ability to affect shit unconsciously is high.
>>5657601
>Your misery will reach out and infect the ones closest to you whether you want it to or not
this is true, you'll grow increasingly bitter and be left with no friends and a family that resents you
>>5649352
>I was reading about how one theory about how mtfs are created is that they have too much testosterone and when it floods the brain it's turned into an estrogen by an enzyme
Only that could be accounted for as high testosterone levels directly influence your digit ratio so simply looking at the digit ratio of mtf would tell you if they had a big T bath in the womb or not.
I have a 1:1 digit ratio so that's actually more in-line with what women get in the womb.
>>5657284
be my bf family
>>5657507
tell them all you've just found out you've got pcos and take t in secret.
you're welcome!
>>5657284
I didn't have my first kiss till December and I'm 24.
It was awesome.
>>5657662
>that could be accounted for as high testosterone levels directly influence your digit ratio so simply looking at the digit ratio of mtf would tell you if they had a big T bath in the womb or not.
Kek no researcher is going to base a study off of bro-science digit-ratios, as if they mean anything. Seriously, what year do you think this is?
>>5657884
>digit ratio
>Bro science
No. It's only that if you start to imply things like personality and sexuality from it, but it can be used pretty well to determine if someone had high or low pre-natal androgen exposure.
>>5657909
>it's an urban myth because I ignore all the studies into it.
You salty cause you got a female digit ratio, bro?
>>5657914
>>5657911
The 'bro science' part is when people try to simplistically correlate possible hormonal exposure in the womb with male or female traits.
In that there is no fucking link there except for a few extreme cases, and pretending that's the only thing that determines those traits, or that it affects things that no study has shown it affects, when there's reams of scientific evidence that states otherwise, is what makes it an urban myth, or pseudoscience. Using scientific data to 'prove' things it doesn't actually prove is fake/incorrect science.
For the record, i'm a cis guy whose friends are pretty much all scientists (i'm a writer), my index and middle fingers are roughly the same length (although on the left hand, there's more of a difference, which is fucking weird), and I have high levels of T in my system which leads to me building muscle extremely fast and being pretty irritable in general.
>>5657914
dis
i pass perfe/k/t 100% pre t, almost 6'0 and have a noticeably longer ring finger
my experience is of course, proof of the digit ratio theory
>be a bi cis female
>feel very dysphoric about my vagina
>hate that it's there, really fucking wish I had a penis, feel like a penis or nothing at all would be way more fucking fitting for me than a vagina, sometimes not having a penis makes me incredibly depressed
>like being called "he" or a guy
>always identified more with males than females
>still love my breasts
>still like my body other than that
>still want to be a cute, sexy female
>still socially comfortable with being female
I have no fucking idea what's wrong with me.
how do you faggots find (online) friends that are both tolerant and tolerable? im a pre-anything guy who likes using his natural voice (partly because not out to people i live with and dont want them to hear and question, and partly because i just really like speaking naturally if i can)
if i post as a cis guy looking for friends, i either get super normies that dont understand my frog memes and also get weird when they find out im trans (either "oh my god my sweet baby i support you *posts on facebook about having a trans friend so theyre a cool ally*" or they dont understand and cant deal)
if i post as a trans guy then i either get other trans people that are normies without my sense of humour and are boring to be around, or chasers
i-i just want a fellow cancer that likes shitposting and memes as much as me that will treat me like a cis guy ;_;
>>5658547
2016 syndrome
>>5658590
You're in luck, anon. Shitposting is my passion and I treat guys as guys if they say they're guys.
I'm another ftm though.
