I think i may have the desire to become a girl because of 4chan only.
I was a somewhat normal kid with no many issues.
But then, i've discovered 4chan. After 3 years of /lgbt/, i think the excess of information destroyed my concepts.
I don't know anything more about me, my mind is messed up.
If i never learnt about transsexualism, about all this, i would be a normal guy today, and would live 'till 50 with no worries. But not i fear living even 1 year without being a girl. At the same time i fear and don't want to be a girl.
>>5571994
Ya wanna cross-dress, go right ahead. But for the love of god, DON'T try and get a sex change. It'll ruin your life. More than half of all trans people commit suicide after they get one.
>>5571994
i think you might be on to something here because i feel the same
>>5572007
I already crossdress, but i'm not feminine enough and when i look into the mirror i start planning about killing myself. I would need hormones to help with that.
But why a sex change is bad and half of trans kill themselves after getting it? I didn't understand.
Not that i tottally want to get one. To be honest, it scares the shit out of me. But if i go on mones, i can't stay with a dick right. It will be ridiculous unfunctional, and a girl doesn't have a dick.
>>5572024
Can you relate a bit?
>>5572007
Correlation doesn't equal causation. Trans people have high suicide rates all throughout life because of discrimination, self hatred, etc. Those suicides aren't caused by srs.
>>5572007
>More than half of all trans people commit suicide after they get one.
Incorrect. 40% is the commonly cited figure for the transgender suicide attempt rate. It reflects a predominantly pre-op population, and obviously not all suicide attempts are successful. The post-op suicide attempt rate is lower, however even if it was not, it would be blatantly incorrect to interpret a 40% suicide attempt rate as "more than half of all trans people commit suicide".
>>5571994
Do what feels good. It's your body and your life, live it the way you want to.
There is nothing wrong with transitioning, there is nothing wrong with staying 'normal'. It's all up to you.
>>5571994
Yes, OP. This place CAN fuck you up. It fucked me up. Had to go out and have the sex I thought I wanted and thank christ, realised it was not what I wanted.
Be a drag queen if you think you'll get a kick out of it, but you DO NOT want to become a tranny. You DO NOT know what it entails.
Post-op transsexuals have a suicide rate twenty times higher than that of the normal population. You do not want to jump on that train just because 4chan messed you up. I would seriously suggest getting off 4chan for a while, or at least going out and having some sex or crossdressing adventures in RL before you do anything drastic.
>>5572233
The post-op suicide rate is generally LOWER than it would be if they didn't go through the operation, provided they are legitimately trans - and it's not like they let just anyone have a sex change. And McHugh's entire argument is based on a study he didn't even apparently understand - it said that post-op trans people have a higher suicide rate than the GENERAL POPULATION, which obviously doesn't tell you anything about the actual effectiveness of the treatment. It's like arguing a cancer treatment is ineffective and should be avoided because it "merely" cuts the number of cancer cases in half. And the same study even says that for those who transitioned after 1989, the post-op transgender suicide rate is only INSIGNIFICANTLY higher than the general population.
>>5571994
No, but it can give you cancer.
>>5572047
That statistic is false, it's a misinterpreted quote from a questionable study. See a gender therapist to sort things out.
>>5572262
>The post-op suicide rate is generally LOWER than it would be if they didn't go through the operation
Horseshit. When people see what they've done to themselves; what they've been led to believe will magically fix all their problems, and that there is NO WAY to go back to be a whole, functioning human again, it's entirely understandable that they'd become suicidal.
>it said that post-op trans people have a higher suicide rate than the GENERAL POPULATION, which obviously doesn't tell you anything about the actual effectiveness of the treatment.
I'd be very interested in seeing the figures that show pre-op have a higher suicide rate than post-op.
>>5572233
>2016
>still using these retarded statistics
>>5571994
Are you sure you don't just have obsessive tendencies? For a while after discovering the trans community, I was convinced I was trans. Then I reflected on it and noticed that I get totally obsessed with things for a few years, then mostly drop them. Right now I'm riding it out to see if this is a temporary obsession or not.
If you're anything like me, here's my advice to you: don't tell anyone about it. If you tell other people about it, you might feel committed to go through with it. Let it stew for a few years before acting on your feelings. If you're relatively young, maybe get on anti-androgens. But for the love of god, don't tell anyone.
>>5572321
You're the one that made the original claim, show me your statistics first.
>>5571994
>>5572024
This is not a medical battery because it is filled with leading questions, but maybe it will help you figure yourself out.
>Past
1a. Were you a quiet and an obedient child?
2a. Did you lack a zest for life?
3a. Were you numb to life?
4a. In adolescence, were you detached from others, perhaps called "stoic"?
5a. Would you say your life has tended toward isolation?
6a. Would you say your life feels wasted?
7a. Was there ever a moment where you felt you might not be masculine enough for the situation?
8a. Did you ever associate yourself with what you saw in the mirror?
9a. Or was your attachment to your reflection a weak one?
10a How did looking at photos make you feel?
11a Did you like taking photos of yourself taken?
12a Did you have many photos of yourself taken after your early childhood?
13a Were you told to smile a lot, by strangers or people who knew you?
14a Were you depressed much of your life or told you look like it a lot?
15a Were you told to pick your shoulders up?
16a Did you hunch over?
17a Did you not care what you dressed in or how you looked in general?
18a Were you never told you were more like a girl in childhood?
19a Did you want to shave your arm or leg hair when it came in?
20a Did you ever envy girls or think they were luckier?
21a When a girl expressed interest in you, how did you feel?
22a Were you transphobic, or was your relationship with trans people more complicated than that?
23a Did you feel disgust for boys, feel disapproval for them, or feel unlike them because they were some way?
24a Did you ever think the reason you were a boy was because your parents wanted one, and if you told them you would rather be a girl, that they would be okay with it?
>Fantasies, hopes, or desires
1b. Did you have an interest in playing sports?
2b. Did you like to or ever want to play rough?
3b. Did you ever think that when puberty came around, you might develop as a girl then get taken to the doctor and find out that you had ovaries?
>>5571994
>>5572024
>>5572425
4b. Did you ever have a fantasy of finding out you were intersex in some way?
5b. Did you have a fantasy of having your genitals destroyed by accident or illness and then you "would just have to live as a girl" with the approval of doctors and acceptance of family and friends?
6b. Did you ever look at a cute girl and think you would rather be her?
7b. Did you ever desire to dominate a woman sexually?
8b. Did the extent of your sexual fantasies involving women only go as far as finding their bodies attractive?
9b. If you ever wanted a girlfriend, what did you imagine having a girlfriend would be like?
10b What was your sex life like?
11b Did you think sex was strange, something you could not see yourself wanting, or something you couldn't understand the desire for?
12b Did you enjoy pornography?
13b If you did, which did you prefer to envision yourself as, if at all?
14b Did you imagine having a family in the future? How did you imagine that life, if you did?
15b Did you have a ready preference of playing female characters without any coaxing?
16b If not, did you have an anxiety and/or an interest over playing or selecting a female character?
17b If you did, and then you played a female character (such as being forced to for RuneScape's "Recruitment Drive" quest) did you have a preference for playing female characters thereafter?
18b Did you have an interest in looking up things related to sex changes since childhood?
19b Did you have an interest in what you would have looked like if you were a girl?
20b Did you wonder what your life would have been like if you were a girl?
21b Would you describe this interest as curious, melancholic, or something else?
>>5572047
Don't worry about the dick, only get rid of it if it's your earnest desire to do so.
>>5572376
why do you need to say these things sempai?
>>5572227
including ^, i'm worrying about NEETdom and 4chan being driving forces, and there being some kind of obsessive disorder. i was mostly alright for a long time (i've kept an extensive journal for the past many years), with the worst seeming to just be feeling ashamed after masturbating to porn with MTFs. then i became NEET and it all started rushing in, I went on 4chan a lot, finding this board. and it has only accelerated since then, even to the point where despite not being NEET anymore, it still hasn't subsided.
>>5571994
>Can 4chan make someone trans?
No, but trans can make someone 4chan. Just be glad it didn't make you tumblr instead.
>After 3 years of /lgbt/...
Son (or daughter?), I've been here since day one, and I'm just as cis-het as I ever was. (My wife and most of my friends are queer, before anybody asks why I'm here.) Learning about transgender stuff doesn't magically turn cisgender folks into trannies. If it resonates with you, then there was already something in your brain for it to resonate with.
Talk to a damn therapist already.
>>5572227
oh and if you're interested in a more detailed story of my problem, i have an archived post
>>5572425
ok I have answers, now what to do with them?
>>5572333
Nice get anon. Hoping you are still here. You mentioned OCD and related it to this board in which you were believing you were trans or what have you. I have had anxiety since 14 and took medication until I was 18 (almost 20 now). I have always been straight and never had a queer thought. After being single for the past two years now and after recently fucking a girl randomly, I have been dealing with a thought.that I'm gay. It's hard to communicate exactly what is going through my mind but I've read online that there is a thing called homosexual OCD where it is more of an irrational fear of being gay. I have no cognitive reason that this would be brought out in me. I also relate with a good portion of the symptoms. For a few days I would remind myself of this HOCD and it would put my thoughts to rest. But after a bit the thought of "what if I'm gay" came back into my head. I never had gay thoughts such as ooo look at him until a few months of me asking "what if I'm gay" came and went. It literally came out of no where and never reached beyond me simply asking myself what if I'm gay. Now I tend to ask myself gay questions to figure out if I'm gay or not. I don't think I am but I can't convince myself one way or the other. I feel like my libido is about gone too.
>>5573073
Hell, my body image is shit too. I'm a hair over 6 foot and weigh 130 on a good day. I feel like a bitch because of who I am in relation to thicker guys my age. I don't know why but I'm always aware of it. My voice (to me) sounds very high pitch. Idk what it really sounds like but when I talk it sounds very high pitched but not feminine. Kinda like Linus Tech Tips' very own Linus.
>>5571994
If all it took was browsing 4chan to make you think you wanna be a grill, then there was probably an underlying issue to begin with anon.
>>5573021
Well, I think the interpretation of your answers is easy enough you could do it on your own. You could post them. It's not a matter of the number of yeses and nos, but which questions received which answers and why.
>>5571994
Why would a straight cis person be on /lgbt/ for 3 fucking years?
>I'm not gay, I just really like these bathhouses
>>5573218
i think if it were quite that simple then lots of us wouldn't have problems
>Past
>1a. Were you a quiet and an obedient child?
I don't know
>2a. Did you lack a zest for life?
Probably not until 6 years ago
>3a. Were you numb to life?
same ^
>4a. In adolescence, were you detached from others, perhaps called "stoic"?
Yes I've always been detached
>5a. Would you say your life has tended toward isolation?
yes
>6a. Would you say your life feels wasted?
yeah but from many factors
>7a. Was there ever a moment where you felt you might not be masculine enough for the situation?
I don't know
>8a. Did you ever associate yourself with what you saw in the mirror?
>9a. Or was your attachment to your reflection a weak one?
I guess? I've been dissociate
>10a How did looking at photos make you feel?
I don't know
>11a Did you like taking photos of yourself taken?
No
>12a Did you have many photos of yourself taken after your early childhood?
Some? Not by my own doing though
>13a Were you told to smile a lot, by strangers or people who knew you?
I don't think so
>14a Were you depressed much of your life or told you look like it a lot?
6/>24 years
>15a Were you told to pick your shoulders up?
Yes
>16a Did you hunch over?
Yes
>17a Did you not care what you dressed in or how you looked in general?
Mostly
>18a Were you ever told you were more like a girl in childhood?
I don't think so
>19a Did you want to shave your arm or leg hair when it came in?
Yes
>20a Did you ever envy girls or think they were luckier?
Yes
>21a When a girl expressed interest in you, how did you feel?
Nice, wanted
>22a Were you transphobic, or was your relationship with trans people more complicated than that?
I masturbated to MTF porn
>23a Did you feel disgust for boys, feel disapproval for them, or feel unlike them because they were some way?
Yes, in particular, but also I didn't feel like most people at all
>>5573359
>24a Did you ever think the reason you were a boy was because your parents wanted one, and if you told them you would rather be a girl, that they would be okay with it?
No
>Fantasies, hopes, or desires
>1b. Did you have an interest in playing sports?
Yes
>2b. Did you like to or ever want to play rough?
Not really
>3b. Did you ever think that when puberty came around, you might develop as a girl then get taken to the doctor and find out that you had ovaries?
No
>4b. Did you ever have a fantasy of finding out you were intersex in some way?
No
>5b. Did you have a fantasy of having your genitals destroyed by accident or illness and then you "would just have to live as a girl" with the approval of doctors and acceptance of family and friends?
Yes
>6b. Did you ever look at a cute girl and think you would rather be her?
Yes
>7b. Did you ever desire to dominate a woman sexually?
I'm not sure. Kind of?
>8b. Did the extent of your sexual fantasies involving women only go as far as finding their bodies attractive?
No
>9b. If you ever wanted a girlfriend, what did you imagine having a girlfriend would be like?
Not being lonely, having someone to make me happy
>10b What was your sex life like?
Virgin for a long time, then had sex with a couple girls. Not very good in quality
>11b Did you think sex was strange, something you could not see yourself wanting, or something you couldn't understand the desire for?
It was more something really abstract to me. I never understood masturbation for a very long time
>12b Did you enjoy pornography?
Yes
>13b If you did, which did you prefer to envision yourself as, if at all?
I was completely detached from it for a long time, then I would insert as the girl
>14b Did you imagine having a family in the future? How did you imagine that life, if you did?
No
>15b Did you have a ready preference of playing female characters without any coaxing?
On occasion, not that often
>>5573365
>16b If not, did you have an anxiety and/or an interest over playing or selecting a female character?
some interest
>17b If you did, and then you played a female character (such as being forced to for RuneScape's "Recruitment Drive" quest) did you have a preference for playing female characters thereafter?
not sure
>18b Did you have an interest in looking up things related to sex changes since childhood?
I don't think so but I'm too old to have had the internet that long
>19b Did you have an interest in what you would have looked like if you were a girl?
Yes
>20b Did you wonder what your life would have been like if you were a girl?
Yes
>21b Would you describe this interest as curious, melancholic, or something else?
Curious
Sup Gage
>>5572425
>Did you not care what you dressed in or how you looked in general?
If yes, what does that mean? Please explain.
>>5573407
For me I felt little attachment to how I looked and was perceived so I didn't put effort into my appearance.
>>5572425
So if I answered *correctly* for all of these can I stop agonizing about whether or not I'm trutrans
>>5572333
I have OCD and my therapists initial theory was I obsessed my way into being trans. I disagree with this. I like the idea of being a girl. I dislike many aspects of my male body. I am willing to go through transition and have taken steps already. What I believe my OCD did for me was make the question of if I was trans or not harder to figure out by giving me a fixation on it and presenting me with repeated illogical thoughts. I don't blame my OCD on me being trans, rather the difficulty I had coming to accept that. Questions and ideas for and against me being trans would pop into my head at all hours. It made life and figuring this out complicated.
Prior to 4chan, I was a bit weird but not overtly LGBT. Homophobic and transphobic even. 4chan helped me open up to my feelings. My OCD complicated these feelings. I rode these feelings out for a while and while they did go away or become background noise for a decent period of time, I feel like there isn't any going back for me now that I'm awake to them. I will never not want to be a girl. I will always want to transition. If I carried on my life as a male, I'd always have that "what if..." And longing to have transitioned deep down inside.
I'm not the girliest person, I'd be a tomboy if I was born cis, but I can't escape I feel like a girl on the inside. If a bit of a bad ass tough one.
Tl;Dr 4chan probably just woke you up to things. I'm not a fan of the idea OCD convinces people they're trans unless it has happened with other conditions before. I never had OCD convince me I was anything else, so why trans? Because I had genuine confusion and a genuine desire to be a woman I was coming to terms with.
>>5572425
1) obedient yes, but very emotional
7) more like I didn't understand why I was expected to be masculine
9) more like "I could look better but meh"
10) holy shit gross, how is that the expression people see when I show emotions?
14) looked depressed: yes since puberty. were depressed: yes but very gradually until current 20's. Though I was bullied.
18) no but I was
19) no, it came in very gradually, but now I do legit hate it and shave it.
21) like I couldn't possibly play the role of the guy she was interested in
23) I always thought they were brutish, obnoxiously competitive and generally unkind
24) not really
3) no, but to develop on a lot of these questions, I was asexual and still am to a great degree, so I mostly saw puberty as simply "growing up" and not also becoming a gendered person with gendered sexual attributes
6) yes, in fact that thought process is a significant component of my "physical attraction to girls"
7) no, let alone using my dick on anyone.
9) I have no idea. I don't "get" what differenciates a bf/gf from a friendship, because intimacy is alien to me.
10) no sexual orientation but fetishes about being dominated, since a very young age. (no sexual abuse)
11) yes
12) at some point, yes
13) as the girl
14) never
15) yes
19) yeah, always thought that's what I would choose to look like
20) didn't think I would be more social or would have girl interests or girl relationships. Just the same, but with a female body. The idea alone just seems more comfy and worth living as
What's clear is that I don't want to be a guy. I hate the idea of getting more masculine, it ruins what little self-esteem I have. I would start my life over as a normal girl, but I don't particularly desire female sexual attributes. To develop it's like I'm too autistic to care about having an important gender role, and too asexual to care about having an attractive gendered body. All I want is to be able to project myself in the future, and as a guy it doesn't work.
>>5571994
Ingest 50CCs of semen stat.
just transition already maki
>>5572425
1a. For the most part
2a. Not really, at least till fairly recently.
3a. Same as 2a.
4a. Yeah
5a. Yeah
6a. Yeah
7a. Yeah
8a. Yeah
9a. Not really
10a. Indifferent.
11a. Didn't really like it, didn't bother me much either though.
12a. Not really
13a. Occasionally.
14a. Yeah, pretty much since puberty.
15a. Sometimes.
16a. Not really.
17a. I was that way through most of childhood, around late high school I started to care
18a. Not really, no one ever really said I was like a girl, though there was this one weird incident in first grade where the teacher was surprised that I didn't mind reading a book with a female main character (which apparently they thought was a big deal?).
19a. Not until around the time I finished highschool.
20a. Yeah, definitely.
21a. Excited I guess?
22a. Not really, I didn't really give much thought about trans people until I got involved with the online LGBT community.
23a. Not really, I just found it harder to connect with boys than with girls.
24a. Nope.
1b. Nope
2b. Nope
3b. Nope
4b. Yeah, though this started fairly recently (high school)
5b. Yeah, but it's mostly a recent thing (like 4b)
6b. Yeah
7b. Nope
8b. I find like the overall shape of their body attractive, and the way certain clothes looks on it, never really fantasized about actual sex or anything though.
9b. Pretty much imagined it as having a close platonic relationship with a girl, just closer and more exclusive.
10b. Didn't have one.
11b. Yeah, I get aroused by women but I don't desire any kind of sex.
12b. Nope
13b. N/A
14b. I assumed that I would be married to a girl, and made up names for my three kids, never really gave much thought to it otherwise.
15b. Yeah
16b. N/A
17b. N/A
18b. Nope
19b. Yeah
20b. Yeah
21b. Not sure.
>>5573407
On it's own, it could mean that you didn't like your appearance for some reason. Based on how you answer the other questions, that reason may be because appearing male alienates, disgusts, or demotivates you, because you desire to be seen as female. It's common for trans women (and others that do not like their natural appearances) to not put any effort or thought into their look because they didn't feel there was a point in trying to look good, because they would still look bad (masculine). When buying clothes, they may have just sought to buy whatever was there and move on (which I think is reasonably common for cis men as well, but the emotion or reasoning for it is different).
>>5573606
Assuming you told the truth, pretty much, senpai.
>>5573359
>>5573365
>>5573381
>>5573769
>>5573861
Okay, I went to sleep last night and I've got 3 classes today, then I have to speak to my academic advisor. I probably won't be able to tell you all what I think until after 3 PM EST.
>>5572425
>1a. Were you a quiet and an obedient child?
No.
>2a. Did you lack a zest for life?
No.
>3a. Were you numb to life?
No.
>4a. In adolescence, were you detached from others, perhaps called "stoic"?
Yes.
>5a. Would you say your life has tended toward isolation?
Yes.
>6a. Would you say your life feels wasted?
Yes.
>8a. Did you ever associate yourself with what you saw in the mirror?
Yes.
>9a. Or was your attachment to your reflection a weak one?
Yes.
>10a How did looking at photos make you feel?
Awful.
>11a Did you like taking photos of yourself taken?
No.
>12a Did you have many photos of yourself taken after your early childhood?
No.
>13a Were you told to smile a lot, by strangers or people who knew you?
No.
>14a Were you depressed much of your life or told you look like it a lot?
Yes.
>15a Were you told to pick your shoulders up?
Yes.
>16a Did you hunch over?
Yes.
>18a Were you never told you were more like a girl in childhood?
Yes.
>19a Did you want to shave your arm or leg hair when it came in?
No.
>20a Did you ever envy girls or think they were luckier?
Yes.
>21a When a girl expressed interest in you, how did you feel?
Indifferent mostly.
>22a Were you transphobic, or was your relationship with trans people more complicated than that?
No.
>23a Did you feel disgust for boys, feel disapproval for them, or feel unlike them because they were some way?
Yes, absolutely.
>24a Did you ever think the reason you were a boy was because your parents wanted one, and if you told them you would rather be a girl, that they would be okay with it?
No.
>>5574334
>1b. Did you have an interest in playing sports?
No.
>2b. Did you like to or ever want to play rough?
No.
>
3b. Did you ever think that when puberty came around, you might develop as a girl then get taken to the doctor and find out that you had ovaries?
No.
>4b. Did you ever have a fantasy of finding out you were intersex in some way?
Yes.
>5b. Did you have a fantasy of having your genitals destroyed by accident or illness and then you "would just have to live as a girl" with the approval of doctors and acceptance of family and friends?
No. Don't care about genitals much.
>6b. Did you ever look at a cute girl and think you would rather be her?
Yes, often.
>7b. Did you ever desire to dominate a woman sexually?
No. Not interested in sex.
>8b. Did the extent of your sexual fantasies involving women only go as far as finding their bodies attractive?
I have no sexual fantasies.
>9b. If you ever wanted a girlfriend, what did you imagine having a girlfriend would be like?
As a very close and exclusive friendship.
>10b What was your sex life like?
I have no sex life. I've tried it once and that was awful and disgusting, don't want to do it anymore.
>
11b Did you think sex was strange, something you could not see yourself wanting, or something you couldn't understand the desire for?
Never wanted to have sex.
>12b Did you enjoy pornography?
Yes.
>13b If you did, which did you prefer to envision yourself as, if at all?
I don't envision myself while watching porn.
>14b Did you imagine having a family in the future? How did you imagine that life, if you did?
I don't want to have a family.
>15b Did you have a ready preference of playing female characters without any coaxing?
Yes.
>18b Did you have an interest in looking up things related to sex changes since childhood?
No.
>19b Did you have an interest in what you would have looked like if you were a girl?
Yes.
>20b Did you wonder what your life would have been like if you were a girl?
Yes.
>>5574336
>21b Would you describe this interest as curious, melancholic, or something else?
Curious.
Another degenerate here
>Past
1a. Were you a quiet and an obedient child?
yeah
2a. Did you lack a zest for life?
yep
3a. Were you numb to life?
always have been
4a. In adolescence, were you detached from others, perhaps called "stoic"?
Yep
5a. Would you say your life has tended toward isolation?
100% yes
6a. Would you say your life feels wasted?
yep
7a. Was there ever a moment where you felt you might not be masculine enough for the situation?
I don't think so
8a. Did you ever associate yourself with what you saw in the mirror?
Barely
9a. Or was your attachment to your reflection a weak one?
Yeah
10a How did looking at photos make you feel?
didn't like it
11a Did you like taking photos of yourself taken?
No - I HATED this.
12a Did you have many photos of yourself taken after your early childhood?
No
13a Were you told to smile a lot, by strangers or people who knew you?
yeah
14a Were you depressed much of your life or told you look like it a lot?
15a Were you told to pick your shoulders up?
so many times
16a Did you hunch over?
yep
17a Did you not care what you dressed in or how you looked in general?
yep
18a Were you never told you were more like a girl in childhood?
don't think so
19a Did you want to shave your arm or leg hair when it came in?
yeah
20a Did you ever envy girls or think they were luckier?
yes
21a When a girl expressed interest in you, how did you feel?
this never happened
22a Were you transphobic, or was your relationship with trans people more complicated than that?
I didn't know they existed
23a Did you feel disgust for boys, feel disapproval for them, or feel unlike them because they were some way?
I didn't feel that I fitted in with them
24a Did you ever think the reason you were a boy was because your parents wanted one, and if you told them you would rather be a girl, that they would be okay with it?
they wouldn't be ok with it, but the first part is yes
>>5574419
Cont'd
>Fantasies, hopes, or desires
1b. Did you have an interest in playing sports?
No, but I was forced into it
2b. Did you like to or ever want to play rough?
No
3b. Did you ever think that when puberty came around, you might develop as a girl then get taken to the doctor and find out that you had ovaries?
No
fixing responses I didn't notice
>>5573359
>>5574222
>8a. Did you ever associate yourself with what you saw in the mirror?
>9a. Or was your attachment to your reflection a weak one?
I guess? I've been dissociated from myself for a while and feel detached from my reflection but I've also been depressed
>14a Were you depressed much of your life or told you look like it a lot?
should be: for the past ~6 years, just turned 25
>>5572233
>Paul McHugh
Literally a meme doctor. Do your research, the mans arguments have been debunked a million times now.
>>5571994
Oddly enough at first I was damn sure about being trans, never actually came to 4chan before that. I was also super suicidal, then started hormones and it got better. Now that I'm seeing what the rough result will be I actually feel okay too, but browsing /lgbt/ absolutely shatters me, I see all these super high expectations and eventually they become mine too and now I think if in the end I don't turn out to be less of a hon I'm gonna be right where I started and then what stops me from giving suicide a proper attempt?
4chan is bad, real bad, and it doesn't reflect reality, but if you spend enough time in the echo chamber you believe it does. But it's a place where you can easily have a discussion if you're lonely which makes it so terrible for people who already are miserable.
Leave this place and be pic related, it's the only way out.
>>5573359
>I don't know
Did your parents have to be called in to school often because of something you did wrong?
>Probably not until 6 years ago
>same ^
How were you if you were detached, but also enjoyed life until 6 years ago? Do you think there was a cause you could point out for why you started enjoying life less at 19?
>Yes I've always been detached
Why do you think you were detached?
>yes
Do you think the reason for this was mostly from your end, or those of other people?
>yeah but from many factors
Do you think if you had not been detached, that a different course of events would have happened that would not make feel this way?
>I don't know
It's a vague question.
>I guess? I've been dissociated from myself for a while and feel detached from my reflection but I've also been depressed
When did you start dissociating from yourself and your reflection? Do you think this came as an expansion of your detachment from others? Where do you think it came from?
>I don't know
Did you avoid looking at them, not that you never got to see them, but avoided doing so?
>No
What was the reason?
>Some? Not by my own doing though
-
>I don't think so
Don't worry about it, it's something that depends on others just as much.
>for the past ~6 years, just turned 25
And others who have noticed the change, what do you think would say is the cause? Or have they voiced their opinions?
>Yes
>Yes
Did you try to change this most of the times it was noted? Whether you did or you did not, what was your reason for your choice?
>Mostly
What were the exceptions?
>I don't think so
Same as 13a, the smile question.
>Yes
-
>Yes
What were the exceptions?
>Nice, wanted
Did you have any intention of reciprocating or pursuing her interest?
>I masturbated to MTF porn
How would you explain the sincere reason for that?
>Yes, in particular, but also I didn't feel like most people at all
What was your self-perception? Who or what did you think you were and what was your purpose in life?
>>5573359
>>5573365
>>5578112
>No
Neither part is true?
>Yes
Which sports were they and at what ages? Did you get to play any of them? If you did, would you say it was a positive experience?
>Not really
How did you feel watching boys play rough or if they tried to involve you in the game?
>No
>No
>Yes
I think it's common for trans women to answer yes to at least one of those three questions. How old were you when you first had the idea or desire to have your genitals destroyed so you could live as a girl?
>Yes
For her appearance? Something else, or something more?
>I'm not sure. Kind of?
Did you imagine her deferring to you in a day-to-day relationship context? Did you imagine her thinking of you as her strong, dependable, protector? Did you enjoy this fantasy if you had it?
>No
Describe them.
>Not being lonely, having someone to make me happy
Why did you see it as having to make someone happy? Is it in a sense of it being a male's responsibility to make his girlfriend happy, or because he would do it naturally out of affection? Do you think the same of a female having a boyfriend?
>Virgin for a long time, then had sex with a couple girls. Not very good in quality
Why do you say it wasn't too good?
>It was more something really abstract to me. I never understood masturbation for a very long time
Lines up with dissociation.
>Yes
Some MtFs mention moving from one form of pornography to the other, seeking a new high. Would you describe your use of pornography that way?
>I was completely detached from it for a long time, then I would insert as the girl
You started inserting before or after you started masturbating to MtF porn? Did you ever attempt inserting as the male?
>No
Were you left disillusioned of the dream of a family? Did you not want to be the father, protector, and provider? Is that the way you saw you saw the role of father?
>On occasion, not that often
So all other things being equal, you did not select female characters more often than males?
>>5573359
>>5573365
>>5578112
>>5578458
>some interest
>not sure
You were meant to skip these since you answered in the affirmative for 15b.
>I don't think so but I'm too old to have had the internet that long
In the time that you have had the internet, have you done so?
>Yes
>Yes
Did you think it would have been pleasant? How did you see it differing from your life as it had been up until those moments?
>Curious
What was the origin of the curiosity?
>>5573769
1) obedient yes, but very emotional
Fits of rage or sulking?
7) more like I didn't understand why I was expected to be masculine
Did you completely ignore the expectations or did you yield a bit?
9) more like "I could look better but meh"
Did you have an idea of what that better would be, or was it vague?
10) holy shit gross, how is that the expression people see when I show emotions?
Sounds like dissociation and/or dymorphia/dysphoria
14) looked depressed: yes since puberty. were depressed: yes but very gradually until current 20's. Though I was bullied.
The depression started gradually from what point? The bullying continued until when? Did you stop being bitter about it? How big a part did the bullying play in your depression?
18) no but I was
In what ways?
19) no, it came in very gradually, but now I do legit hate it and shave it.
-
21) like I couldn't possibly play the role of the guy she was interested in
What part of her behavior indicated to you the person she wanted you to be? Describe the person you felt she wanted you to be.
23) I always thought they were brutish, obnoxiously competitive and generally unkind
Now the same question, applied to the girls.
24) not really
Neither part is true?
>>5573769
>>5578769
3) no, but to develop on a lot of these questions, I was asexual and still am to a great degree, so I mostly saw puberty as simply "growing up" and not also becoming a gendered person with gendered sexual attributes
So it was not something that you felt good or bad about before it happened? What did you think of growing up?
6) yes, in fact that thought process is a significant component of my "physical attraction to girls"
-
7) no, let alone using my dick on anyone.
You would rather be entirely submissive, or is this your asexuality?
9) I have no idea. I don't "get" what differenciates a bf/gf from a friendship, because intimacy is alien to me.
So a romantic relationship is a friendship with something you don't understand attached?
10) no sexual orientation but fetishes about being dominated, since a very young age. (no sexual abuse)
What is the origin of the desire to be dominated, in your mind?
11) yes
Possibly dissociation.
12) at some point, yes
-
13) as the girl
From the moment you started using pornography?
14) never
Was it something that just didn't attract your attention, or something that repelled you?
15) yes
-
19) yeah, always thought that's what I would choose to look like
20) didn't think I would be more social or would have girl interests or girl relationships. Just the same, but with a female body. The idea alone just seems more comfy and worth living as
You didn't think being more comfortable in yourself would give you a different viewpoint in life?
>What's clear is that I don't want to be a guy. I hate the idea of getting more masculine, it ruins what little self-esteem I have. I would start my life over as a normal girl, but I don't particularly desire female sexual attributes. To develop it's like I'm too autistic to care about having an important gender role, and too asexual to care about having an attractive gendered body. All I want is to be able to project myself in the future, and as a guy it doesn't work.
>>5573769
>>5578769
>>5578774
Have you already started hormones? Have you tried placing yourself in a female role in your imagination? Has that changed your ambivalence? It seems to me there are some MtFs like you, who then become as normally interested in life and personal relationships as the next person after being able to apply themselves to the female role. Since you do use pornography and clearly don't find comfort in your appearance, I believe you are of this type. Do you think you may be non-binary? From what you have answered, you seem MtF with a significant likelihood to me, but it is important you find the words that you think describes yourself best.
>>5572536
You sound fucking cool be my token straight friend pls
>>5572132
He never claimed the SRS its self makes people commit suicide. He claimed more than half of people who undergo the procedure are not happy with it. That, combined with the stigma and self-hatred, makes more than half of the people commit suicide.
>>5572425
>1a. Were you a quiet and an obedient child?
Yup
>2a. Did you lack a zest for life?
Yup
>3a. Were you numb to life?
Yup
>4a. In adolescence, were you detached from others, perhaps called "stoic"?
Probably, didn't think about it much.
>5a. Would you say your life has tended toward isolation?
Had a lot of friends, but they might have just came over to use my computer/game consols
>6a. Would you say your life feels wasted?
I was just passing time till i died.
>7a. Was there ever a moment where you felt you might not be masculine enough for the situation?
Most of the time
>8a. Did you ever associate yourself with what you saw in the mirror?
Not really, also always avoided mirrors
>9a. Or was your attachment to your reflection a weak one?
See above
>10a How did looking at photos make you feel?
Was just kind of 'meh' guess that is me.
>11a Did you like taking photos of yourself taken?
Didn't really avoid it as far as i can remember
>12a Did you have many photos of yourself taken after your early childhood?
Not really
>13a
Yuppers
>14a Were you depressed much of your life or told you look like it a lot?
Oh yeah, lot less depressed since i came out as trans
>15a Were you told to pick your shoulders up?
Yeah
>16a
yup
>17a Did you not care what you dressed in or how you looked in general?
Definitely
>18a
No one ever really commented on my gender in childhood.
>19a Did you want to shave your arm or leg hair when it came in?
Yeah, didn't until recently though and it feels great
>20a Did you ever envy girls or think they were luckier?
Yeah
>21a When a girl expressed interest in you, how did you feel?
Only know of one girl that was interested in me, didn't care too much
>22a
Yeah a little, whenever there was a TV show or somthing with Crossdressing or anything was super comfortable
>23a :
Never really felt like "one of the boys"
>24a:
Nope
What are these questions anyway? Are they common things among trans?
>>5573861
1a. Were you shy? If so, why do you think that was? Why were you obedient?
2a & 3a. How recently? Did it coincide with anything as far as you can tell?
4a. If you were called stoic, how did you feel about that? Did you think it was accurate?
5a. Does the reason for that lay mostly with you because you let it be or wanted it that way, or because others would not give you a chance?
6a. For what reason?
7a. What was the situation? Do you remember well enough to describe it?
8a & 9a. Was it a connection you felt negatively about? Did that ever change?
10a. It didn't bother you, or you didn't think of the person in the photo as yourself?
11a. -
12a. Do you think it was because you didn't have an interest in having your photo taken?
13a. Why do you think you didn't smile?
14a. Do you think puberty was the cause?
15a. Did you ever try to? What was your reason for doing it or not?
16a. Were you lethargic at all? Did you have a decent amount of self-esteem or self-confidence?
17a. What do you think caused that change in high school? Just growing up? What sort of aesthetic did you go for? Do you think you would have been more interested as a child in buying clothing if you had known since then there would be no judgments about what you selected? What sort of clothing do you think you would have selected, if you think so?
18a. Did it bother the boys of the class, or were the teachers the only ones making something of it?
19a. Why do you think you didn't when you first started having it? Why did you start in high school?
20a. What made you think that about them?
21a. Excited to be appreciated by someone? Excited to have sex or a relationship? Was there an anxiety in it different from what a male would normally experience?
22a. What got you started with the online LGBT community? When? Did you start talking to them and then find yourself identifying greatly with their stories?
23a. Why do you think connecting to boys was harder for you?
>>5573861
>>5579149
24a. Neither part?
1b. Were you made to play them anyway? If so, would you describe your time playing as a positive experience?
2b. How did you feel watching boys play rough or if they tried to involve you in the game?
3b. Not even a hope? Do you think it was because you didn't have an interest at the time, or because you felt you knew better than to hope for that?
4b & 5b. Which year of high school? Do you think it had to do with puberty? How far had puberty progressed by that point?
6b. For her appearance? For something else or something more?
7b. You didn't want to be the man she would look to for help when she needed it?
8b. -
9b. What was it like when you realized there was something more to being in a relationship with someone than being their friend?
10b. Did you have low self-esteem about your body or many insecurities?
11b. There's nothing about sex that calls to you or draws your attention?
12b. There's nothing for you there?
14b. Did you ever have a particular girl in mind?
15b. Did you feel more comfortable playing female characters?
18b. You didn't know about it, or you didn't find it interesting?
19b. Did something start the interest? When did it start?
20b. Did you think it would have been pleasant? How did you see it differing from your life as it had been up until those moments?
21b. Is it something you spent a lot of time thinking about or imagined multiple times?
>>5574334
>>5574336
>>5574419
>>5574422
>>5579060
I'm going to sleep. I will answer these tomorrow.
>>5578985
>more than half
not even true m8.
Also suicide rates are high for trannies across the board. It doesn't mean transitioning made them kill themselves, it means they were likely to kill themselves before and transitioning didn't help them enough to prevent that.
Not OP but I decided to take the trans test too. Been on HRT for a few weeks now and questioning if it's for me. Did I make a mistake /lgbt/? Am I actually cis after all?
>1a. Were you a quiet and an obedient child?
No, I was very hyperactive
>2a. Did you lack a zest for life?
As a child, no. As a teenager and young adult, yes.
>3a. Were you numb to life?
Ditto
>4a. In adolescence, were you detached from others, perhaps called "stoic"?
Yes
>5a. Would you say your life has tended toward isolation?
Yes
>6a. Would you say your life feels wasted?
Yes
>7a. Was there ever a moment where you felt you might not be masculine enough for the situation?
Yes
>8a. Did you ever associate yourself with what you saw in the mirror?
Yes
>9a. Or was your attachment to your reflection a weak one?
Not usually, but sometimes I felt weird looking at myself
>10a How did looking at photos make you feel?
No strong feelings one way or another
>11a Did you like taking photos of yourself taken?
No
>12a Did you have many photos of yourself taken after your early childhood?
No
>13a Were you told to smile a lot, by strangers or people who knew you?
No
>14a Were you depressed much of your life or told you look like it a lot?
Yes
>15a Were you told to pick your shoulders up?
Yes, frequently, since I was very young
>>5579818 cont'd
>16a Did you hunch over?
Yes, all the time
>17a Did you not care what you dressed in or how you looked in general?
Yes, unless I had a specific reason to care, like if I was going on a date or an event
>18a Were you never told you were more like a girl in childhood?
Not really, but I was teased for being girly in high school and college
>19a Did you want to shave your arm or leg hair when it came in?
Yes, I always hated my facial and body hair
>20a Did you ever envy girls or think they were luckier?
Yes
>21a When a girl expressed interest in you, how did you feel?
Good
>22a Were you transphobic, or was your relationship with trans people more complicated than that?
Never cared much either way before I started talking to them online
>23a Did you feel disgust for boys, feel disapproval for them, or feel unlike them because they were some way?
Slightly
>24a Did you ever think the reason you were a boy was because your parents wanted one, and if you told them you would rather be a girl, that they would be okay with it?
No and no
>1b. Did you have an interest in playing sports?
None whatsoever
>2b. Did you like to or ever want to play rough?
Sometimes
>3b. Did you ever think that when puberty came around, you might develop as a girl then get taken to the doctor and find out that you had ovaries?
No
>4b. Did you ever have a fantasy of finding out you were intersex in some way?
No
>5b. Did you have a fantasy of having your genitals destroyed by accident or illness and then you "would just have to live as a girl" with the approval of doctors and acceptance of family and friends?
No
>6b. Did you ever look at a cute girl and think you would rather be her?
Yes
>7b. Did you ever desire to dominate a woman sexually?
Yes
>8b. Did the extent of your sexual fantasies involving women only go as far as finding their bodies attractive?
No, I always had a strong drive to have sex with women
>>5579824 cont'd
>9b. If you ever wanted a girlfriend, what did you imagine having a girlfriend would be like?
Hard to remember, I haven't been single in a long time. Before I had a girlfriend, I think I just imagined a girlfriend being like a normal friend but closer. I didn't really think about sex back then.
>10b What was your sex life like?
Always been satisfying to me
>11b Did you think sex was strange, something you could not see yourself wanting, or something you couldn't understand the desire for?
Back in high school I was asexual, but I think I just went through a late puberty. Since then, no.
>12b Did you enjoy pornography?
Yes
>13b If you did, which did you prefer to envision yourself as, if at all?
Sometimes the man, sometimes the woman
>14b Did you imagine having a family in the future? How did you imagine that life, if you did?
When I was very young, but not since I was a teenager
>15b Did you have a ready preference of playing female characters without any coaxing?
No, though I didn't particularly prefer male characters either
>16b If not, did you have an anxiety and/or an interest over playing or selecting a female character?
No
>17b If you did, and then you played a female character (such as being forced to for RuneScape's "Recruitment Drive" quest) did you have a preference for playing female characters thereafter?
I don't understand the question
>18b Did you have an interest in looking up things related to sex changes since childhood?
No
>19b Did you have an interest in what you would have looked like if you were a girl?
Yes
>20b Did you wonder what your life would have been like if you were a girl?
Yes
>21b Would you describe this interest as curious, melancholic, or something else?
Slightly curious, slightly wishful
>>5579149
>1a. Were you shy? If so, why do you think that was? Why were you obedient?
Yeah I was, a lot of it is because I was easily embarassed I think, as for being obedient it was mainly because that was what was expected of me and saw no reason to do otherwise.
>2a & 3a. How recently? Did it coincide with anything as far as you can tell?
Mostly since the middle of high school.
>4a. If you were called stoic, how did you feel about that? Did you think it was accurate?
Wasn't ever called that.
>5a. Does the reason for that lay mostly with you because you let it be or wanted it that way, or because others would not give you a chance?
I'd say it's a combination.
>6a. For what reason?
I just have this general sense of life not being as enjoyable as it used to be, like at this point no matter what I do I'll never be as happy as I was when I was younger.
>7a. What was the situation? Do you remember well enough to describe it?
Not really any situation in particular, just in general I've never really had a sense of being masculine.
>8a & 9a. Was it a connection you felt negatively about? Did that ever change?
Not really, I was pretty much just indifferent.
>10a. It didn't bother you, or you didn't think of the person in the photo as yourself?
Didn't bother me.
>12a. Do you think it was because you didn't have an interest in having your photo taken?
Didn't have a particular interest in it, didn't mind it that much either though.
>13a. Why do you think you didn't smile?
Just didn't really come naturally to me I guess.
>14a. Do you think puberty was the cause?
Yeah, I mean I've felt pretty negative about puberty ever since it happened so that seems plausible.
>15a. Did you ever try to? What was your reason for doing it or not?
Yeah when people told me to.
>16a. Were you lethargic at all? Did you have a decent amount of self-esteem or self-confidence?
I've been pretty lacking in self-esteem/self-confidence, at least since like middle school or so.
>>5579937
(cont)
>17a. What do you think caused that change in high school? Just growing up? What sort of aesthetic did you go for? Do you think you would have been more interested as a child in buying clothing if you had known since then there would be no judgments about what you selected? What sort of clothing do you think you would have selected, if you think so?
This happened around the time in high school that I made the first friends that I was really comfortable getting close to in several years, and that really changed my attitude on a lot of stuff. For the most part I wore just fairly plain clothes, colorful but not flamboyant, though I probably would have been willing to try more unusual clothing if I knew I wouldn't be judged for it. I probably would have chosen to wear female clothing at least part of the time if that was the case.
>18a. Did it bother the boys of the class, or were the teachers the only ones making something of it?
Boys didn't seem bothered by it, but I don't think they really noticed, I never really did anything to draw attention to it (teachers only noticed it because I was choosing it from a selection of books they offered).
>19a. Why do you think you didn't when you first started having it? Why did you start in high school?
Well I didn't really notice it until high school, and didn't really care until like my senior year. Could be some kind of weird late-onset gender issues, or earlier I could have just been too depressed to really care.
>20a. What made you think that about them?
I felt that they were more free to wear pretty clothes, didn't "have to" be strong, and were allowed to talk about their problems and feelings. And I was also kind of envious of their body/facial shape.
>>5578769
>>5578774
>>5578776
Don't want to clog the thread and I don't need to answer everything here to come to my own conclusions, so I'll synthetize things.
You have a great way of formulating your questions, do you have a lot of experience with shrinks?
>Do you think you may be non-binary?
Possibly? Yes, but unlikely. I don't sense something that "clicks" between male and female or outside of either. I would rather say I wish I was female, but I have a very hard time accessing my emotions about that wish.
Which leads me to a question about hormones, are there a bunch of studies out there that focus on their concrete mental effects? I've seen just one so far. I'm not on hormones, I haven't even seen a therapist yet, and I'm afraid to go without a clearer picture about my feelings.
>Have you tried placing yourself in a female role in your imagination? Has that changed your ambivalence?
Yes, and a lot of things about the typical female role resonate with me. In particular, I find it much easier to project myself in a relationship as a girl. I can project myself having sex in a female body. I can't clearly get off to it, but the idea somehow feels right. To develop:
>You would rather be entirely submissive, or is this your asexuality?
Both, one one side I am sexually aroused by feelings of submissiveness, and on the other side I have no sexual attraction towards other people (I feel nothing sexually towards girls, and I've liked dick for a few years, but I don't like men, so it's entirely possible that my thing for dicks is just another fetish). As things are, the idea of intimate contact makes me anxious because it brings out the discomfort I feel towards my body.
I know I'm very likely to be dysphoric enough to consult, but the anxiety caused by the emotional realization, along with my constant need to rationalize and challenge my desires, makes it hard to break the cycle of self-doubt that I've been in for the past 5 months. I'd give it more time, but I'm 22...
>>5572007
because botched operations suck, and its too expensive for most trans women to get surgery from a doctor that knows what he or she is doing. doctors actually trained to do male-female viginoplasties. to be clear, botched opererations are when they cut of your penis, and a male to female viginoplasy, which rewire almost everything. you got your clit, your labias, and your vagina. it's a complex surgery that most plastic surgeons aren't trained. unfortunatly there are a lot of doctors who will perform the surgery for the extra money, and because they don't know how perform it they cut off your dick instead.
>>5571994
4chan convinced me I'm ftm for a while, but I had the same symptoms as before, I just interpreted them differently. I didn't come in with no gender issues and suddenly start wanting to cut my tits off. But I did overinterpret everything, because reading posts here it seems like the only options are "cis and fine with your body/gender" and "transsexual", while I clearly didn't fall into the first category.
>>5581905
>they cut off your dick instead.
Just a clean cut with no attempt at a fuck hole?
Sign me up.
>>5573096
I feel very similar. The constant comparison of mass is on my mind all the time. I do not understand why I'm not like that.
I think i may have the desire to become a guy because of tumblr only.
I was a somewhat normal kid with no many issues.
But then, i've discovered 4chantumblr. After 3 years of SJW, i think the excess of information destroyed my concepts.
I don't know anything more about me, my mind is messed up.
If i never learnt about transsexualism, about all this, i would be a normal girl today, and would live 'till 50 with no worries. But not i fear living even 1 year without being a guy. At the same time i fear and don't want to be a guy.
>>5571994
4chan can only make you a faggot.
>>5572233
>john hopkins
gtfo
>>5572007
well meme'd nigga where's your source
>>5590336
>>>/tumblr/
>>5590336
>You're not really trans, you're genderqueer. Don't transition.
Wouldn't a genderqueer person be happy if they undergo some kind of transition?
>Sexist questionnaire to find out your trans
What exactly is sexist about it? It seems less based on gender roles than the COGIATI at least.
>>5574334
>>5574336
>>5574341
>>5574419
>>5574422
>>5578769
>>5579937
>>5579980
>>5579991
>>5579060
>>5579738
>>5579818
>>5579824
>>5579836
>>5579937
>>5579980
>>5581669
>>5582469
You're all probably wondering where the interpretations for you are. I'm grinding pre-calc problems this weekend in preparation for a test that determines whether I will move up to calc. I look forward to answering, but it takes a while to write out posts.
I'm honestly not sure who I have and haven't responded to anymore.
>>5590336
Sexist how? The things I asked weren't asked because "Omg, gurrrls totes do this and if YOU don't you're, like, totalllly not a tranny#!" I'm not suggesting all girls are quiet and obedient or have a natural dislike of boys. These are just things many trans women report. I'm just going based off common effects/behaviors of dysphoria rather than abilities ascribed to the genders. Even "transbians," those trannies often called straight men, have many of these. And even though how closed your legs are naturally is closely related to your gender identity, I didn't ask that.
do you want to be a psych when you're older?
>>5572047
be a guy, who cross dresses, and continue to grow as an adult
OR
be an mtf and likely lose friends/family, career and life opportunities
>>5595968
>pre-calc
Please tell me you're underage b&.
>>5571994
>likes anime
>wants to become trans
of fucking course
bampin this shit
>>5571994
you going through the same thing I went through
Scared that you were wrong and fuck up your whole life
But, also scared that you are right and you don't go through HRT
and 4chan doesn't make you trans
you were trans the whole time you just discovered it on 4chan
Now to start HRT or not is your choice
go to a gender therapist first though
it may be a bit reassuring
>>5607875
Not op but why is it I can never tell the truth when I go to a therapist? I get ready to go and I'm like I'm gonna tell the truth no more lies. But when I go I just tell them lies to me manipulate them to get the answer/desired conclusion.
>>5607898
Write a letter beforehand nigger. You probably have some internalized transphobia and are ashamed.
>>5607898
I do this but not on purpose, I get awkward trying to express my feelings in conversation. Found out from my therapist she thinks I might be a sperg. Makes sense always thought my dad was, he has the narcissism and empathy issues. But I aways seemed different. I read up on the way aspergers affects women and I fit that description completely. So now I realize why I repressed it for so long, nature is a fucking cruel mistress.
>>5573614
Would you mind elaborating on what your obsessions are/were like with regard to being trans? I'm concerned about whether some of my thoughts and feelings are because of obsessions, either from autistic fixation (I have an autistic spectrum diagnosis so this could reasonably apply, although I haven't experienced any notable fixations over anything else) or OCD (which hasn't been diagnosed but has an outside chance of applying). I can identify with a lot of what you've said about yourself, and for many reasons I'm fairly sure that my being trans is "real", but not enough to disregard these concerns entirely.
>>5573777
Are you going to supply that? also I need a rectal sample.
>>5571994
>I think i may have the desire to become a girl because of 4chan only.
then leave 4chan, the real world outside is nothing like this shithole, faggot
>>5608253
I had thoughts about being trans back when i was five. My mom when i was born had a wrong result when she was pregnant with me that i would be a girl(still wished i was....). And growing up i always had the feeling of being born in the wrong gender.
lots of people think that ppl who are trans, only decided that way due to "having a fetish/emasculization fetish/feminization fetish"
Which definitely isnt me. Plus being on HRT im glad that my libido is a fraction of what it was pre-HRT.
>>5571994
Anyone have any of the images from operation /b/sex? The idea was to make half of 4chan into traps/trannies. This kind of agenda has been present with the website since the start, before the /lgbt/ board ever existed.
>>5607898
its easy, your scared
>>5571994
Shouldn't you be in the navy, Maki?
>>5572425
21 if age matters
1a. Pretty argumentative with my parents as an adolescent, but what else is new. Before puberty, yes
2a. Still do
3a. Still am
4a.Still kinda am
5a. Yes
6a. Yes
7a. Like all the time
8a. Sometimes
9a. This was more common - like I needed to be reminded by what I saw
10a. Bad
11a. Maybe when I was really little; otherwise no
12a. No
13a. No
14a. I'm not sure if I have been
15a. No
16a. Yes
17a. No I cared
18a. Nobody told me that
19a. No at first I was glad to be maturing. After the novelty wore off I thought they were gross though. Started shaving within the last year and haven't ever wanted to stop since.
20a. Yes
21a. Happy; confident
22a. I only ever disliked the people that only want attention
23a. Yes
24a. No
1b. I enjoyed playing them but didn't like competing
2b. Yes
3b. No
4b. I didn't even know that was a thing until recently. Finding that out would make me happy though
5b. No
6b. Yes
7b. Sometimes. I generally prefer sub though
8b. No they went further
9b. Warm, comfortable, happy
10b. In fantasies? Healthy, intimate, kinky (>implying IRL sexing)
11b. No
12b. Yes
13b. I didn't really until recently. Now I usually like to envision myself as the woman
14b. No, just thought about falling in love
15b. Yes. First chosen character in games was Yoshi in Mario Kart 64. Generally only play females given a choice today.
18b. No
19b. No but I always felt like being a girl would be nice in the "What if you could be a girl for a day" things
20b. Maybe once or twice in the past; constantly these days though
21b. I can't recall; more melancholic these days
>>5609577
It's in full swing. /b/ is full of qt gaybois now
>>5609505
Just out of curiosity, why is that a decreased libido thing to you? I'm happy with HRT overall but loss of sex drive/sexual functioning is a downside to me, and I've been going out of my way to try preventing it.
>>5609593
You're probably not really trans, it sounds more like it's just a fetish to you. Hell, it doesn't sound like you're really attracted to guys either, seems like you only like women or maybe you're just asexual.
>>5611029
meant to ask "why is a decreased libido a good thing to you?"
>>5572536
I Am just someone who cares about other people. I am Straight, But I have friends from all sectors of LGBT. Feel bad for trans people the most. That has got to be the worst feeling in the world. Body dysphoria, not feeling like you were born in the right body. Thats got to be hard. if you feel that way from some stuff, either way, its resonating with you for a reason.
>>5571994
HRT? fine. SRS? no.
>>5572536
>>5611053
Thanks, senpai. It's nice to have people like you in the world.
I some times wonder if 4chan made me start crossdressing. I'm not sure I would of ever know about it much less do it as often as I do now.
>>5612780
>tfw that will never happen to me
>>5571994
4chan makes you lonely and desperate for a relationship. girls get into relationships easier than guys and they get to be cute and pretty. if you spend all your time here you probably could turn trans eventually
>>5616980
I'm >>5616801. I doubt it senpai. I never knew
>tfw no gf, even when I browsed /r9k/ every day for months, maybe a year.
Then when I started hormones (which was when I finally realized A) I was a tranny and B) I didn't have what it takes to kill myself), I developed
>tfw no bf
>Past
1a. Were you a quiet and an obedient child?
yes after 3 years old
2a. Did you lack a zest for life?
after around age 9
3a. Were you numb to life?
a bit
4a. In adolescence, were you detached from others, perhaps called "stoic"?
yes
5a. Would you say your life has tended toward isolation?
yes
6a. Would you say your life feels wasted?
yes
7a. Was there ever a moment where you felt you might not be masculine enough for the situation?
yepp
8a. Did you ever associate yourself with what you saw in the mirror?
yea
9a. Or was your attachment to your reflection a weak one?
not really
10a How did looking at photos make you feel?
fine
11a Did you like taking photos of yourself taken?
no
12a Did you have many photos of yourself taken after your early childhood?
no
13a Were you told to smile a lot, by strangers or people who knew you?
yes
14a Were you depressed much of your life or told you look like it a lot?
i wasnt depressed or anything but nothing intressting really happend
15a Were you told to pick your shoulders up?
yes
16a Did you hunch over?
yes
17a Did you not care what you dressed in or how you looked in general?
as long as i dont look like a edgy emo etc im fine
18a Were you never told you were more like a girl in childhood?
once or twice it happend when i and someone else (i got bad memory about my childhood desu) started >fighting, just name calling a bit i guess the other kids held us back.
19a Did you want to shave your arm or leg hair when it came in?
i didnt care
20a Did you ever envy girls or think they were luckier?
no
21a When a girl expressed interest in you, how did you feel?
tfw never happend
22a Were you transphobic, or was your relationship with trans people more complicated than that?
i didnt care about that and wouldnt break up a friendship, im only really against sjw's being annoying desu
23a Did you feel disgust for boys, feel disapproval for them, or feel unlike them because they were some way?
no
sorry for english i am russian 1/2
>>5617647
1b. Did you have an interest in playing sports?
no
2b. Did you like to or ever want to play rough?
sometimes
3b. Did you ever think that when puberty came around, you might develop as a girl then get taken to the doctor and find out that you had ovaries?
what
4b. Did you ever have a fantasy of finding out you were intersex in some way?
no
5b. Did you have a fantasy of having your genitals destroyed by accident or illness and then you "would just have to live as a girl" with the approval of doctors and acceptance of family and friends?
wew no
6b. Did you ever look at a cute girl and think you would rather be her?
yes
7b. Did you ever desire to dominate a woman sexually?
yes
8b. not sure
9b. If you ever wanted a girlfriend, what did you imagine having a girlfriend would be like?
comfy i guess, but also less time on vidya which would actully be good
10b What was your sex life like?
normal i guess
11b Did you think sex was strange, something you could not see yourself wanting, or something you couldn't understand the desire for?
i would gladly want sex but its not the most important thing
12b Did you enjoy pornography?
not 3dpd
13b If you did, which did you prefer to envision yourself as, if at all?
i dont know
14b Did you imagine having a family in the future? How did you imagine that life, if you did?
never did
15b Did you have a ready preference of playing female characters without any coaxing?
yes
18b Did you have an interest in looking up things related to sex changes since childhood?
yes
19b Did you have an interest in what you would have looked like if you were a girl?
yes
20b Did you wonder what your life would have been like if you were a girl?
yes
21b Would you describe this interest as curious, melancholic, or something else?
curiosity, i think
>>5609505
Could you be more specific as to what the obsessive thoughts (as in, the "repeated illogical thoughts" you mentioned) were? What you mentioned seemed to be standard trans feelings; I can't see any connection to OCD.
>>5611029
In my case, I'd welcome decreased libido because it would mean reduced urge to masturbate, frequency of erections, and sexual thoughts; each of which I really don't like dealing with considering my body (masturbation feels bad, erections feel bad, sexual thoughts can't be fulfilled and it makes me feel bad). I wouldn't want reduced libido if I were female, or maybe at least had a reasonably comfortable/passable/tolerable body.
>>5611020
How can you even tell when the board moves so fast?
>>5572425
>Past
1a. Sorta.
2a. Yeah.
3a. Yeah.
4a. Yeah.
5a. Yeah.
6a. Yeah.
7a. Yeah.
8a. Either I never gave a fuck or when I did, I hated what I saw there.
9a. If any.
10a I did not take pics of myself.
11a NO
12a No, only those taken against my will by stupid parents.
13a I don't remember.
14a Probably not.
15a I don't remember.
16a Yes.
17a I never cared for the person I saw in the mirror so I wore plain, grey/dark brown baggy clothes but had my own ideas about what I want to wear.
18a I was told that but only until I turned 12 then it stopped.
19a Yes but I didn't because I was too paralyzed what the fuck was happening to my body.
20a I don't think so.
21a Nothing. Embarrassed.
22a I didn't even realize trans people exist.
23a Yes, thanks to my Catholic upbringing.
24a My parents didn't care either way.
>Fantasies, hopes, or desires
1b. Hated sports.
2b. I found it stupid and whenever boys wanted to include me into their "games" I was rough and vicious and not in a "fun" way.
3b. I knew something about my body was weird and off place but I couldn't put my finger on it like I never went "I lack ovaries, oh it makes sense now."
>>5572429
4b. Not really tbqh.
5b. No.
6b. Yes.
7b. No.
8b. I knew that men were supposed to like women but I really sucked at it, I knew which bodies were hot because someone said that and I did not express my opinion. I mostly just emulated what I saw on TV that was considered "normal."
9b. Masculine, most likely butch but still a more fem version of me at that time.
10b It doesn't exist.
11b Definitely, thanks to being Catholic and everything. I was briefly enamoured of boys but had to suppress any feelings like that because that was seen as "wrong" and I did not want to get into trouble and I wanted to be normal above all.
12b Yes.
13b I liked scenarios about two people, didn't matter what they were whether man and woman who were caressing and holding each other in nude, nothing super kinky, then I could play that out in my head with me and another boy.
14b I never did.
15b I did not play that many video games and the only game I remember playing as a child (C&C Generals: Zero Hour) did not have a gender and other games I played didn't have selectable gender.
16b Nope.
17b I never played RuneScape.
18b Not really.
19b I was too shy to think questions like that because I thought that was a sin.
20b I somehow subconsciously thought of me as a girl so I am more interested in what I would my life would be as a boy ... even though I still look like one and spent most of my teenage years living as one but whatever.
21b Curious maybe but really don't give two fucks otherwise. I don't want to be a boy.
1a. Were you a quiet and an obedient child?
yes
2a. Did you lack a zest for life?
some what
3a. Were you numb to life?
in a way
4a. In adolescence, were you detached from others, perhaps called "stoic"?
i was called anti-social
5a. Would you say your life has tended toward isolation?
yes
6a. Would you say your life feels wasted?
nope
7a. Was there ever a moment where you felt you might not be masculine enough for the situation?
far too many
8a. Did you ever associate yourself with what you saw in the mirror?
sometimes
9a. Or was your attachment to your reflection a weak one?
most times yea
10a How did looking at photos make you feel?
weird
11a Did you like taking photos of yourself taken?
no
12a Did you have many photos of yourself taken after your early childhood?
no
13a Were you told to smile a lot, by strangers or people who knew you?
no
14a Were you depressed much of your life or told you look like it a lot?
i was told i looked like a pothead alot
15a Were you told to pick your shoulders up?
no
16a Did you hunch over?
yes
17a Did you not care what you dressed in or how you looked in general?
yes
18a Were you never told you were more like a girl in childhood?
some times
19a Did you want to shave your arm or leg hair when it came in?
yes
20a Did you ever envy girls or think they were luckier?
yes
21a When a girl expressed interest in you, how did you feel?
normal
22a Were you transphobic, or was your relationship with trans people more complicated than that?
never met a trans person but i do support them
23a Did you feel disgust for boys, feel disapproval for them, or feel unlike them because they were some way?
yes
24a Did you ever think the reason you were a boy was because your parents wanted one, and if you told them you would rather be a girl, that they would be okay with it?
yes/not sure if they would like it or not
>Fantasies, hopes, or desires
1b. Did you have an interest in playing sports?
no
2b. Did you like to or ever want to play rough?
no
3b. Did you ever think that when puberty came around, you might develop as a girl then get taken to the doctor and find out that you had ovaries?
no
4b. Did you ever have a fantasy of finding out you were intersex in some way?
yes
5b. Did you have a fantasy of having your genitals destroyed by accident or illness and then you "would just have to live as a girl" with the approval of doctors and acceptance of family and friends?
yep
6b. Did you ever look at a cute girl and think you would rather be her?
sometimes
7b. Did you ever desire to dominate a woman sexually?
not really
8b. Did the extent of your sexual fantasies involving women only go as far as finding their bodies attractive?
yea
9b. If you ever wanted a girlfriend, what did you imagine having a girlfriend would be like?
i dont want one never did
10b What was your sex life like?
nonexistent
11b Did you think sex was strange, something you could not see yourself wanting, or something you couldn't understand the desire for?
no
12b Did you enjoy pornography?
some hentai most normal got boring too fast
13b If you did, which did you prefer to envision yourself as, if at all?
i like to be the girl or the guy that gets dominated by a girl
14b Did you imagine having a family in the future? How did you imagine that life, if you did?
did not
15b Did you have a ready preference of playing female characters without any coaxing?
yes
18b Did you have an interest in looking up things related to sex changes since childhood?
didn't know about it for the most part but heard stories
19b Did you have an interest in what you would have looked like if you were a girl?
yes
20b Did you wonder what your life would have been like if you were a girl?
far too much
21b Would you describe this interest as curious, melancholic, or something else?
curious for the most part
so how did I do?
>>5571994
100%
example: me
>>5626542
Goddamn, Anon, you're ambitious.
Though personally, I'd prefer your thoughts on the relevance of the questions in general, and I wonder if that might not be more useful to the people who responded.
>>5626685
>I'd prefer your thoughts on the relevance of the questions in general
What do you mean by that?
>Were you a quiet and an obedient child?
yes
>Did you lack a zest for life?
yes
>Were you numb to life?
yes
>In adolescence, were you detached from others, perhaps called "stoic"?
sometimes
>Would you say your life has tended toward isolation?
yes
>Would you say your life feels wasted?
absolutely
>Was there ever a moment where you felt you might not be masculine enough for the situation?
yeah when I was about to get beat the fuck up by bullies in high school
>Did you ever associate yourself with what you saw in the mirror?
not really
>Or was your attachment to your reflection a weak one?
definitely weak
>How did looking at photos make you feel?
meh
>Did you like taking photos of yourself taken?
no
>Did you have many photos of yourself taken after your early childhood?
no
>Were you told to smile a lot, by strangers or people who knew you?
maybe when I was younger but people are just used to me being depressing by now
>Were you depressed much of your life or told you look like it a lot?
yes
>Were you told to pick your shoulders up?
no
>Did you hunch over?
yes
>Did you not care what you dressed in or how you looked in general?
didn't care
>Were you never told you were more like a girl in childhood?
yeah quite a bit now that I think about it
>Did you want to shave your arm or leg hair when it came in?
leg hair sort of yeah
>Did you ever envy girls or think they were luckier?
nebulously
>When a girl expressed interest in you, how did you feel?
awkward
>Were you transphobic, or was your relationship with trans people more complicated than that?
I never knew about trans people really but I was fairly homophobic
>Did you feel disgust for boys, feel disapproval for them, or feel unlike them because they were some way?
yes and frat guys made it worse
>Did you ever think the reason you were a boy was because your parents wanted one, and if you told them you would rather be a girl, that they would be okay with it?
no
>Did you have an interest in playing sports?
no but my dad made me anyway
>Did you like to or ever want to play rough?
no
>Did you ever think that when puberty came around, you might develop as a girl then get taken to the doctor and find out that you had ovaries?
no
>Did you ever have a fantasy of finding out you were intersex in some way?
yes
>Did you have a fantasy of having your genitals destroyed by accident or illness and then you "would just have to live as a girl" with the approval of doctors and acceptance of family and friends?
no
>Did you ever look at a cute girl and think you would rather be her?
yes
>Did you ever desire to dominate a woman sexually?
rarely
>Did the extent of your sexual fantasies involving women only go as far as finding their bodies attractive?
giving oral sounds fun
>If you ever wanted a girlfriend, what did you imagine having a girlfriend would be like?
I only tried to get a girlfriend because I though that's what I was supposed to do
>What was your sex life like?
404 sex life not found
>Did you think sex was strange, something you could not see yourself wanting, or something you couldn't understand the desire for?
sort of until I started self-inserting as the bottom
Did you enjoy pornography?
yes
>If you did, which did you prefer to envision yourself as, if at all?
both, usually bottom
14b Did you imagine having a family in the future? How did you imagine that life, if you did?
nope
15b Did you have a ready preference of playing female characters without any coaxing?
yes
18b Did you have an interest in looking up things related to sex changes since childhood?
I didn't know it was a thing until 17
>Did you have an interest in what you would have looked like if you were a girl?
no
>Did you wonder what your life would have been like if you were a girl?
sometimes
>Would you describe this interest as curious, melancholic, or something else?
both - and imagining myself as a girl makes me euphoric
>>5572024
Every post on 4chan is designed to destroy your mind in some way, if you had read /pol/ you would now be secluded from your family and look out for things ending in "stein"
4chan didn't make me trans, but I realized I didn't have to end up a hon. 4chan helped me act on it.
>>5628422
4chan made me trans in that I would have never started questioning if I didn't know that dysphoria was a legitimate disorder and transitioning was the treatment. Now that I know, I wish I would have transitioned at 14. But now I get to be a hon at 19. Fml
>>5629518
So how did dysphoria manifest before and how did it get worse (if it did) after going here?
>>5629518
If you're 19 you are fine. Just practice.
>>5571994
yes, I have never met a trans that isn't impressionable and full of "herself".
>>5617030
why even go on /r9k/ it is full of wannabe /b/ chads and pathetic neets
4chans /b/ used to be good
happened to me.
embrace it.
welcome
Is it possible for someone to be trans without being selfish conscious, or are they tied into one another? If one isn't self conscious, does the possibility of being trans become null?
>>5630524
The only things I really enjoyed on there were the misogyny and spaghetti story threads. Couldn't relate with them on anything else, pretty much. So when girls started making their presence known on the board, and those betas all started kissing up to them, I left in search of a new home board.
>>5630625
Dysphoria pretty much destroys the ability to love yourself. That is pretty much all dysphoria is self hate. You can't stand how you look, feel, sound, think.
So yeah if you love yourself you aren't trans.
>>5612780
I'm honestly happy I didnt have internet when I was a teen, I wold probably do something dumb like getting on hormones and becoming a compulsive slut
And I knew about trans long before it became trendy and had agp/some gender confusion from young age, but I would never dare to act on it
Can faggots stop bumping this thread?
>>5629538
The only physical dysphoria I remember was with my voice. I used to sing soprano in choir and I've missed my high voice ever since it started dropping.
I remember some stuff that could be classified as social dysphoria. In primary school I had a lot of female friends and generally fit in better with girls socially. And it was great. But when I got to high school, I was forced to start acting more masculine, and more like and asshole, to keep jock types from picking on me. It worked, but it also made me hate myself.
>>5629550
My face will never pass without FFS and probably not even then. Plus, I'm 6'1" with huge hands and feet, broadish shoulders, and no hips.
>>5631285
What was /pol/ like before 2013?
bump
Well I mean I realised I was gay due to a gay porn thread on /b/
>>5636785
less shills
dorner was uncornerable
No but it can make someone AGP.
>>5631190
bump #1 f4m. just for you
>>5572425
Lets try this... genderqueer/non-binary/unsure person here.
1a. Not quiet, but obedient
2a. No
3a. No
4a. Kinda? I've always been introverted, but I like people. Any detachment was because I was a loser/made fun of, not out of my own desire
5a. No
6a. No
7a. Yes
8a. No
9a. Very Yes.
10a. Normal
11a. No
12a. Yes - my parents are near-obsessive photo-takers
13a. Yes
14a. A little - more as I've gotten older
15a. Yes
16a. No
17a. Until I was 18-19
18a. No
19a. Yes
20a. Sometimes
21a. Good - I'm still mostly attracted to girls (not that I got much interest until college...)
22a. No - definitely more complicated. I actually considered that I might be trans for a while when I was a teenager, but at the time I decided I wasn't and kept expressing male... Still not 100% sure that was the right choice (I'm 26 now).
23a. No
24a. No.
>>5646053
>>5572429
1b. No - I played tennis and did martial arts, but traditionally masculine team sports always disgusted me
2b. No
3b. No
4b. Yes
5b. No
6b. Yes
7b. Yes (but I had an equal desire to be dominated back as well)
8b. No
9b. I have always been attracted to tomboyish girls (and looking back, every girl I've dated, including my current gf, has been bi and somewhat genderqueer...)
10b. Awful - lost my v-card at 24, had several relationships in college that never led to sex
11b. No - I have a ridiculousy high libido
12b. Yes, probably too much
13b. I probably self-insert as the woman in porn more often than the man (though it shifts depending on my mood)
14b. Yes - ironically, very normal nuclear family (probably from growing up in one - I have a very good, close knit family.)
15b. Yes, I almost always play female characters
16b. n/a - see above
17b. My first FFXI character when I was 14 was a Mithra. I may have started cybering a lot when I did...
18b. Yes
19b. Yes
20b. Yes
21b. Mostly curious, but a little melancholic
>>5650235
nah, I wasn't there that early.
...just r9k
>>5650235
I don't think /pol/ was around in 2010. I remember it starting but I don't really remember when.
It was always kinda a mess though but it was a containment board after all, even if a bad one.
>>5572425
1a. Yes, I was regretfully obedient.
2a. 3a. I always wondered why I lived and what was the point. I wanted to be an adventurer as a kid, still do... Looking back it was kind of depressing.
4a. I definitely felt stoic in regards to interacting with others.
5a. It's hard for me to develop platonic relationships. It's easier to keep acquaintances.
6a. Yes
7a. I wouldn't use the word masculine, but I felt inadequate when I wasn't able to compare to other boys.
8a. 9a. I saw it as my reflection. I didn't like looking at it a lot though.
10a. Uncomfortable, There is always something wrong with it. I only have one I kind of like.
11a. No, I would always hide my face and express my concern.
12a. Not really.
13a. Yes almost all the time, and when I did smile people would ask me why I was smiling like it was some anomaly.
14a. I don't think so, but I wasn't very happy. I was just sad.
15a. figuratively? Yes.
16a. Depended on my mood. usually yes, but sometimes I would try and arch my back and suck in my belly.
17a. I didn't care, but I hated jeans, and liked sweats. I liked wearing loose shirts too.
18a. I think I vaguely remember getting yelled at for liking some panties at the store. I was 8 I think. My dad also said something about me being to clingy. I got yelled at for painting my nails with my sister too.
19a. Yes, I dreaded growing arm, leg, arm pit, and facial hair
20a. Frequently.
21a. Uncomfortable.
22a. I was confused more than anything else.
23a. No, I would try and match them with girls in my class though.
24a. No, If I told them I was a girl they would yell at me and punish me probably.
>>5651485
1b. I wanted to play what people I liked played. My Best friend in 1st grade played soccer so I played soccer with her. I also wanted to appease people so I played hockey and football.
2b. I really like hitting things so I liked to play rough. I really like the feeling of forceful contact.
3b. 4b. I think I wished it once or twice after I hit puberty. I didn't think much about gender before puberty.
5b. All the time. the most vivid is placing my genitals out a moving car and hitting them off with a sign.
6b. Yes
7b. Yes
8b. No
9b. Fun, I've had multiple girlfriends. They all were a pain in the end.
10b. I'd fuck anything that had initiative to fuck me.
11b. Yes, I've gotten used to it though
12b. Yes
13b. Almost always the girl.
14b. Yes, loving with kids and loving spouse. I had a desire to give birth that I hid with a pregnancy fetish.
15b. 16b. Yes, I have a lot of anxiety in making a female character, but male characters are hard for me to make.
17b. I think I was tipped over when I started living on my own. Before then I wouldn't spend much time on picking male or female I would always pick male. Now it's the opposite.
18b. I don't think so. I think I was too scared of my parents.
19b. Yes
20b. Yes
21b. Nostalgic mixed with melancholy, and some sort of contempt.
>>5632107
tfw 6'1" broad shoulders and big hands.
>>5572425
>Past
1a. Yee
2a. Depends on what you call a zest, but under typical circumstances yes.
3a. Numb in what way?
4a. Yee
5a. Rather much so.
6a. In many ways, yes.
7a. Many many times.
8a. Tried, but it somehow seemed a little bit off.
9a. See previous answer.
10a. For the most part, like a joke and/or a failure.
11a. Only if I was the one doing it or if the photo managed to not make me look like a dweeb.
12a. I guess so. If anything, I've had more photos in the last few years than in childhood.
13a. Yee. People thought I always looked sad or sometimes angry when I wasn't.
14a. Yee; again see previous answer.
15a. Occasionally, though not often.
16a. Yurr
17a. No. I was always self-conscious about my appearance.
18a. I've been told that both as a kid and as an adult.
19a. Yes. Still do.
20a. Yes, quite often.
21a. Honestly, kind of intimidating. I've been in relationships both of my own accord and initiated by another person, and I've always backed away because I feel like they deserved better.
22a. Transphobic for a short time, though I didn't know why at the time. It was only after I realized I might be in the same boat that it started falling into place.
23a. Yes, though I tried to condition myself out of it. Seeing as I'm posting here, I'd say it hasn't worked too well.
24a. I wouldn't have thought of it in those terms as a kid, though I did have some similar thought patterns.
>Fantasies, hopes, or desires
1b. No. Tried gold and swimming for a short time, was terrible at both.
2b. No.
3b. No, but I didn't have self-conscious trans thoughts back then. I just know I was different and attributed it to latent bisexuality.
Cont.
>>5572429
>>5654452
Cont.
4b. ...yee...
5b. Didn't exactly want my junk destroyed, though I did wish I could rather have lived as a girl off and on through the years.
6b. Yee
7b. Not really, no.
8b. Nah bruh
9b. I had girlfriends. It always felt like I was trying for reasons I didn't really understand.
10b. Bifag. Blown chances to be intimate with both guys and girls; felt like every time I'd try to be with them, my body just wasn't right for the act.
11b. Yurr
12b. Yeah, but not normalfag shit. I have some quirks.
13b. Not sure. Depends at the time, though more often a grill.
14b. Yeah. I'd imagined a partner much like myself, but better than I could ever be. Maybe some kids, but not until we'd both finished our education and knew what we wanted out of life.
15b. I didn't mind it, but I didn't actively prefer it either.
16b. nah
17b. nah, but I'm not much of a gamer either.
18b. In one way or another, yes. I thought that was just a part of puberty and hormone changes for a long time.
19b. Very much so. I prefer my hair long for that reason.
20b. I'm here, so I guess I profess yes.
21b. Curious fascination, I suppose.
>>5631190
bampo #3 ;^)
>>5631190
bump #5
don't want to leave bump no4 behind!!
I planned on answering some of these answered questionnaires today, but I never got to it.
Bump #6
>>5571994
Be a trap.
Don't be trans (yet).
Work towards getting qt.
>>5572425
>Past
1a. Were you a quiet and an obedient child?
>most of the time
2a. Did you lack a zest for life?
>kinda always went by my self and stuff not wanting to do stuff
3a. Were you numb to life?
>same as 2a
4a. In adolescence, were you detached from others, perhaps called "stoic"?
>yup but never called a stoic though
5a. Would you say your life has tended toward isolation?
>definitely
6a. Would you say your life feels wasted?
>yup i often think of things i would do if i could restart from an earlier safe ;)
7a. Was there ever a moment where you felt you might not be masculine enough for the situation?
>never thought of things like that, if i didnt wanna be in a particular situation i got away
8a. Did you ever associate yourself with what you saw in the mirror?
>when i see myself in the mirror i wish i saw some one else but it is me so i guees i associate with myself..?
9a. Or was your attachment to your reflection a weak one?
>weak one see above
10a How did looking at photos make you feel?
>weird
11a Did you like taking photos of yourself taken?
>no never did
12a Did you have many photos of yourself taken after your early childhood?
>nope
13a Were you told to smile a lot, by strangers or people who knew you?
>only by family a couple of times
14a Were you depressed much of your life or told you look like it a lot?
>i think so its just recently though i got to a doctor and spoke about it
15a Were you told to pick your shoulders up?
>no
16a Did you hunch over?
>no i stand up right but not like Gaston
17a Did you not care what you dressed in or how you looked in general?
>only enough to not look like an idiot and i think about that a lot
18a Were you never told you were more like a girl in childhood?
>nope
19a Did you want to shave your arm or leg hair when it came in?
>yup and i do shave my legs now because i dont like the hairs.
cont..
>>5681444
...inued
20a Did you ever envy girls or think they were luckier?
>yep
21a When a girl expressed interest in you, how did you feel?
>weird but not as in 'love' weird
22a Were you transphobic, or was your relationship with trans people more complicated than that?
>never cared about what other ppl did as long as it doesnt hurt others
23a Did you feel disgust for boys, feel disapproval for them, or feel unlike them because they were some way?
>no
24a Did you ever think the reason you were a boy was because your parents wanted one, and if you told them you would rather be a girl, that they would be okay with it?
>no and i know my parents would be okay with it if i was born a girl my name would have been Belinda, if i transition i will not pick that name lol.
>Fantasies, hopes, or desires
1b. Did you have an interest in playing sports?
>no but whenever i do i go 110%
2b. Did you like to or ever want to play rough?
>no, only sexually Kappa
3b. Did you ever think that when puberty came around, you might develop as a girl then get taken to the doctor and find out that you had ovaries?
>no i wasnt stupid i could see my penis
4b. Did you ever have a fantasy of finding out you were intersex in some way?
>no
5b. Did you have a fantasy of having your genitals destroyed by accident or illness and then you "would just have to live as a girl" with the approval of doctors and acceptance of family and friends?
>yes
4chan.. pls this is not fucking spam
Error: Our system thinks your post is spam. Please reformat and try again.
is bs btw
>>5681452
the rest
6b. Did you ever look at a cute girl and think you would rather be her?
>yes
7b. Did you ever desire to dominate a woman sexually?
>not really
8b. Did the extent of your sexual fantasies involving women only go as far as finding their bodies attractive?
>no
9b. If you ever wanted a girlfriend, what did you imagine having a girlfriend would be like?
>i dont know, i guess it would be great and happy
10b What was your sex life like?
>tried it with a girl at 16 havent done it since with girls
11b Did you think sex was strange, something you could not see yourself wanting, or something you couldn't understand the desire for?
>no i want sex
12b Did you enjoy pornography?
>yup
13b If you did, which did you prefer to envision yourself as, if at all?
>women
14b Did you imagine having a family in the future? How did you imagine that life, if you did?
>parcelhouse, dog, 2 kids (adopted obviously) and a husband
15b Did you have a ready preference of playing female characters without any coaxing?
>yes i have always rolled female in games
16b If not, did you have an anxiety and/or an interest over playing or selecting a female character?
>
17b If you did, and then you played a female character (such as being forced to for RuneScape's "Recruitment Drive" quest) did you have a preference for playing female characters thereafter?
>what? see 15b i guess
18b Did you have an interest in looking up things related to sex changes since childhood?
>yep 14 y/o or something like that
19b Did you have an interest in what you would have looked like if you were a girl?
yep
20b Did you wonder what your life would have been like if you were a girl?
>yup, yep and yes
21b Would you describe this interest as curious, melancholic, or something else?
>i dont know i want to explore it a lot more but im too scared to do so because of how other ppl would react, already got a friend that knows about me that is not excactly a supporting structure on this matter.
>>5611020
Happened to me, but like I'm full blown trans and I think I was true-trans even as a kid. Posting on 4chan definitely made me transition younger than I would have otherwise though.
>>5650784
>containment board
literally every single board is a containment board for the topic pertaining to that board's name
/o/ is a containment board for auto shit
/a/ is a containment board for anime
etc
>>5596309
>come out to nearly everybody and everyone has been super supportive and understanding and accepts me for who I am
>live near the gay and trans capital of England
>mum wants to give me facials and make me feel pretty
>can joke about being trans with my friends and they find it funny and not awkward
>friends GF comes round to do my make up while teaching me
>semi pass already without makeup
>MFW my life feels a million times better already and I don't even start HRT for another two weeks
Hey faggot you poster this a few weeks ago
>>5683434
The term means more that a board a board is made to contain discussion that's annoying other boards, by necessity as opposed to just casual request.
>>5684500
I understand.
Wouldn't auto related discussion be annoying if you were trying to discuss literature?
It's exactly the same as my previous post.
>>5683490
until ahmed comes along and stones you to death in the street for being a degenerate according to the quran
>>5689148
kek are you going to unironically defend muslims who literally toss gay people off tall buildings?
>>5693128
No, THOSE Muslims at least don't deserve to be defended. And it's not like we're making a choice between Muslims and /pol/ shitposters, we'd rather have neither.
>>5651591
Sometimes I feel like there isn't a place for transgirls like us in this world, anon. We'll probably never pass. Why even live
>>5693548
what fucking normie advice
>>5693558
>>5697882
here
Don't know if the person who posted the gender questions is still around and answering them, but I'm the person who posted
>>5582469
>>5626462
a while back, and it looks like the second pastebin is about to expire so I decided to upload it again:
http://pastebin.com/uxU3QXKp
It'll be up for another two weeks, hopefully you'll find time to answer it in that time. Also note that this was originally from before you said you wouldn't be able to respond to anyone else's questionaires (in >>5627112) so I'm assuming you've just been busy and are still planning to get around to answering mine.
Just don't mutilate your benis pls
There's nothing "feminine" about having a surgeon cut apart your genitals
>>5705794
too late
might as well go all the way at this point
>>5705794
>benis is more feminine than bagina
>>5705794
Wow to be honest i though this thread had died many weeks ago
>>5631190
>bump 6 buddy boy
These questions make me feel like I am trans, answering everything "as a mtf would" but I'm missing the dysphoria, or maybe it's just directed at my life in general.
I don't recognize my face every morning, and I'm kinda bummed but I've gotten used to it.
The thought that I might become more masculine over time (I'm 21) bothers me the most.
Maybe I'm just avoiding it due to how I have no control over my life, or because I would fit the "dumb no-life mentally ill tranny" stereotype that I hate.
I'm sexually submissive and it's blocked my life, or at least I use that as an excuse to myself.
TLDR How can I stop being such a little bitch and move on with my life so I can choose to become a little bitch?
I believe that AGP can be induced, yes.
>>5721577
You go to a gender therapist because you sound exactly like me.
I don't remember posting in this thread but you sound exactly like me. My therapist and I have been doing babysteps since it's week 1 (1.5 sessions) and dealing mostly with sources of depression. Maybe we just have body dysphoria? Maybe we're just faggots.
My therapist agrees that making baby steps to make myself feel better about myself physically is a good start. It's weird that no one seems to notice my arm hair is gone.
I didn't bother answering that guy's survey because I knew he wouldn't get to me and I didn't care about someone else's reply to them but I answered basically all of them the same.
I also agree with the general consensus of this thread that this shit can be induced, but I think it's not quite that cut and dry since I had self-esteem issues with my body since puberty.
>>5571994
4chan turned me into a trap/borderline maybe trans cockslut.
>muh AGP
Nah. It's not just a fetish, it's also "gee, being a woman would be comfy and nice" and so on.
I got my boyfriend and Master from 4chan too though so it turned out all right.
>>5725197
>being a woman
>comfy
how is it comfy when you struggle both socially and physically to transition and be passable
if you are just a closeted fetishist then nevermind
>>5571994
Do you have dysphoria? No? Then it's not worth it. Wait for more advanced procedures to be invented. Self-insert as cute girls to feel good. That's basically me in a nutshell.
>>5725258
he didn't say being trans, he said being a woman
>>5573073
In the same situatión. Like OP and this.
>>5578961
>token straight friends
If you want to pass, you should only have straight friends
>>5729473
>Falling for the passing meme
Everyone knows you're a tranny no matter what
>>5729494
t. Observation bias
>>5729497
People that "pass" don't talk about passing, if they did they'd just be normal women with a fucked up vag
Passing is a meme, meant to try and ruin as many people's lives as possible
>>5729504
>muh boogeyman
Back to tumblr pls. I've been stealth for years. I barely browse this board now.
>in sorority in skewl
>graduating soon and have a job lined up already
>>5725272
Is there a way someone want to be a girl without having dysphoria? Any way besides AGP?
>Self-insert as cute girls
What do you mean? Hanging out with cute girls? Doubt they would walk with me, and i suck with talking with people
>>5573073
>>5728902
Same shit with me(i haven't heard his aswner before. There's too much posts to read so i missed many).
Even about the anxiety part. Sometimes i feel that i'm about to die, everything goes blur and i hear my hearth, but i choose to not take any medication because i have fear of the side effects.
However i've gone to two therapists (probably not gender specialized) and they didn't helped with the other issues i have, so i'm scared to try again and waste money.
>>5728015
I think for many of us the solution is to choose the nearest pic related and go for it.
I'm considering it if things don't go better or i don't realize what the fuck is wrong with my mind
>>5572132
SRS increases self hatred
>>5730278
a preference to be a girl without a hatred of not?
>>5736230
Is that really a thing though? I mean I hear some people are indifferent towards what gender they are, but the consensus seems to be that they're either cis, AGP, or trans and just don't understand their own identity. Generally it sounds like a trans person with relatively mild dysphoria.
>>5733055
Explain.
>>5733055
the data says the opposite is true
/pol/ pls go
>>5628412
>tfw /pol/ showed me the ways of National Socialism.
Unsere Seeliger Adolf!
U.S.A.
I definitely think that 4chan pushes you to the extremes of your sexual boundries. I had to stop browing /lgbt/ for a while because it was messing me up psychologically. I'm back to normal (ish) now, but I only come on here on the rare occasion. It's really not healthy
>>5748146
Yeah, what sort of stuff were you getting into?
>>5571994
I think it can definitely help you realize it, if you're kind of in denial.
>thread is a month old
B R A V O
R
A
V
O
>>5571994
4chan doesn't make people trans. Trans people end up on 4chan
>>5571994
You almost made me trans. Until I noticed I wanted to stay a man and that testosterone is best and estrogen is weak baby juice. So you turned me gay instead of trans. Fuckers.
>>5572425
1a. yes
2a. yes
3a. yes
4a. yes
5a. yes
6a. yes
7a. yes
8a. no
9a. yes
10a. like ripping them up
11a. no
12a. no
13a. yes
14a. yes
15a. yes
16a. yes
17a. yes
18a. yes
19a. yes
20a. yes
21a. spaghetti
22a. transphobic as shit back then
23a. boys are the worst
24a. at the time yes, they're okay with it now
1b. no
2b. no
3b. yes
4b. yes
5b. yes
6b. yes
7b. not sure
8b. i like girls
9b. couldn't imagine anyone in particular, never thought i'd be attractive to anyone
10b. none
11b. yes
12b. no
13b. no
14b. no
15b. yes
16b. n/a
17b. yes
18b. yes
19b. yes
20b. yes
21b. yes
>>5572425
1a: yes
2a: no
3a: no
4a: yes
5a: eh, kinda
6a: no
7a: yes (playing football)
8a: no
9a: yes
10a: appreciation
11a: no
12a: no
13a: no
14a: no
15a: no
16a: no
17a: yes
18a: nope, never told in childhood
19a: sometimes
20a: no
21a: humbled
22a: yes
23a: nope
24a: they wanted a girl
1b: no
2b: yes
3b: no haha
>>5628412
That is why it is important to never read anything on 4chan, but nonetheless the post on 4chan, to warn other people about all of the pedophiles here.
You can read short posts if you must, but nothing more.
It's really easy. Pick a random thread, hit reply, say was needs to be said, and repeat.
>>5766407
but nonetheless *to post
>>5766263
enjoy looking like you're 40 years old by the end of your 20s
>>5767123
And im still getting triggered. If you don't stop im sage bombing this thread.
Related: Can 4chan make you gay?
Before I started coming here, I was exclusively into women. After 2 years here, I can only get off to men.
>>5747616
He was a wonderful man.
>>5768217
Same desu. I don't even see women as sexual objects at all anymore. We're just friends. And it's amazing!
>>5768325
>I don't even see women as sexual objects at all anymore
This so much. 4chan made me into a fetishist for anything to do with females. Couldn't look at one without getting a boner.
I took a job at a company where 90% is female. At first it was difficult due to years and years of nearly exclusive male friends and tomboy/lesbian girls in my life. Now we're chill and I can go through a day without getting a single boner. I doubt that's a good thing
>>5767141
no ;^)
>>5769902
What is this a cosplay of?
>>5767141
You do realize that sage is not a downvote, right? It doesn't even push the thread down, it just doesn't bump it. The only thing it does is move the thread closer to the reply limit, and you'd still need 70+ more posts for the thread to expire.
>>5776966
420chan mascot
>>5789091
that's the joke you dongo
>>5572376
>>5790680
why is that triangle using a computer
triangles cant use computers
OP here, i'm going to talk with my psychiatrist in two weeks and hopefully get on hormones or antidepressants, wich one is my case.
Thank you all.
>>5793445
Can I be your first bf?
>>5793454
You wouldn't want to :C
>>5793614
Why is that?
I'll support you the entire way.
>>5571994
I'm the person who made this thread >>5788347
and yes, I feel like browsing 4chan back in the day helped introduce me to traps and cross-dressing, etc. which eventually led me to transition. It's entirely possible that if I never actually browsed 4chan or spent so much time on the internet, I may have gone through my entire life without ever getting the idea in my head.
I can't say for sure if it would have been a better life though. I'm guessing probably not. I like myself now.
>>5793617
Well because i'm a mentally messed up freak that totally looks like a male at this moment and got depression...
But that's so nice to hear...
>Past
1a. No
2a. No
3a. Yes, I've been depressed and uncaring since young.
4a. No because I would act differently with others
5a. Yes
6a. I'm too uncaring to care if my life is a waste. I just try to have fun and learn whatever I like.
7a. I often try to act tough if that counts...
8a. No, I hated looking in mirrors. Never combed my hair or dressed up because of it.
9a. I refuse to associate my body with myself
10a I avoid looking at any of my photos
11a No. I refused to take selfies or let anyone photograph me except my closest friends, or at group events
12a Yes but only taken by my friends.
13a No
14a I've been living in a cycle where I go into depression mode, then motivate myself to do/learn things to feel useful, then back to depression again after I realize how pretentious it is.
15a No
16a Yes but its a trait of my dad too
17a Yes because I couldn't bear to look in a mirror. Lately, I've been taking a shower just before going out just so my hair isn't an entire mess.
18a Sometimes
19a Yes but I was afraid of what people'd think of me
20a Yes
21a Nothing
22a No, I never cared much
23a Mostly in terms of cleanliness(like how sweaty they are) and how crude their speech tends to be
24a No
>Fantasies, hopes, or desires
1b.No.
2b. Yes, I loved to have friendly fights with people
3b. No. Never even knew of MTFs or much about gays.
>>5572429
4b.A lot
5b. Tried to destroy them multiple times myself but I've always been afraid that I'd need to be taken to a doctor and my parents would thus find out.
6b. Yes
7b. No
8b. Yes
9b. Not really.. as long as she was loyal and not a player. And intelligent.
10b Don't have one
11b Yes
12b Yes although my tastes are very deviant
13b The woman/trap
14b No
15b No
16b No
18b Yes
19b Yes
20b Sometimes
21b More of a fantasy I wanted
>>5571994
DESU, you're born feeling like a girl even when you feel like a boy. I'm 36 (oldfag) male who viewed his/herself as a female at times, could be part of the genderfluid spectrum. In addition, I'm attracted to women and wants to spend my life as a man with her in marriage, then again I know I'm female in a sense, by spirit or self.
>>5583588
I use to be that way but now that I'm getting closer to being ok with being trans I hate my deep voice and muscles.
>>5805647
this bullshit is killing all faith people have in transgenderism being a real-life thing rather than a made-up fantasy or fetish.
>>5571994
>earliest memories were cross dressing when I was like four
>because super religious conservatard parents, used to pray to God to make me a gril
>discover 4chan at 16
>see that, contrary to the autistic "degeneracy" faggotry they spout now, traps were all the rage around that time on /b/
>used to trap on /b/ in 2009, felt genuinely at peace knowing people attracted to me whereas I got zero attention in real life
>kinda stupid in hindsight
>go through bad break up, cut hair, start lifting
>join military
>four years later
>loneliness and emoness sets in as I work nights, stop lifting and eating, lose a bunch of weight
>start trapping again when the need to comes back
>post on other chans, get a fuckload of attention
>feel really comfortable at home in girl mode but complete shit in guy mode
>still passable thanks to injun genes
Essentially I'm stuck in this fucked up limbo of feels and don't really know what to do. Actually coming out would ruin my life.
>>5807802
so don't come out. just take hormones
>>5810245
This. Coming out before starting HRT is an awful idea. It just gives people a chance to put more roadblocks in your way. Even if you end up changing your mind on transitioning, a month of HRT isn't going to hurt you.
>>5807802
Trying to become a skinny effeminate waifish boy. Currently 130 lbs 5'7" which I think is 20 or so BMI? Did you stop eating completely? I can drink black coffee all day and not eat but haven't tried in awhile because last time I did that I got in a binge cycle but I didn't drink coffee in that cycle it was really bad.
>>5812581
Your weight seems fine, but if you want to get skinnier, restrict your calorie intake. Figure out your basal metabolic rate then eat a few hundred calories less than that per day.
>>5755474
huffing straight man poo probably
>>5815819
I've been eating 1300-1200 daily for 3-4 weeks now and my TDEE is 1900ish, should I go lower?
Of course captcha is food
>>5793269
>triangles cant use computers
That's what they want you to think!
>>5827862
Stop bumping please.
>>5573128
This is the correct answer.
