>>5390148
does being on hrt change anything about the hair that grows on your head?

>>5390206
Chance for partial regrowth of a receding hairline. I've read that it can change the texture and stuff of your hair also but I've never seen anything to back that up

>>5390298
>>5390206

It does. It usually makes the hair ''thinner''. Also, as a personal experience, it also changed my color, from black to brunette

Does finasteride cause breast cancer? Should I be worried?

I just got a call from the pharmacy saying they'd be able to refill my estradiol on Wednesday. Thing is I just ran out this morning. Is there anything to be concerned about going one and a half days without it? I still have spiro

>>5390777
You're fine don't swear a day here and there.

>>5390148

I'll soon go to ffs consultation @ bart. what to expect? do I need to prepare something beforehand? or will he just decide on his own what I need (+ can I trust his opinion, or is he just trying to generate profit)

>>5390900
have you seen enough examples of his prior work, and would you be happy for him to alter you in similar ways?
if past patients come out looking like aliens steer clear, no amount of directing what you want done will help. if they're all passable babes then you can probably trust his judgement

>>5390934

if you go check on his page, most people were very old when they did the surgery.
some examples tho show how he feminized faces in an amazing way.
since I'm already kinda andro and passing some of the time (50% of people think I'm a girl before i start talking) I do think I will turn out well? I really hope so..

>>5390945
sounds okay then, i see why you were worried about him just trying to profit then. if you're already androgynous, spend time looking at yourself in make-up and try and pinpoint the main areas to be addressed, look at photos and kinda cover parts of your face with your hands and focus in on specific areas at a time and ask if it looks like you're looking at a man or a woman from just what you can see. that should give you a better idea. then you can try and prioritise and make a point with him about doing the bare minimum.
for me my nose (bridge) is number one priority, followed by my forehead, possibly my jawline, maybe a little around my upper lip.
i really don't feel comfortable with say, a brow lift. i think it'd change how i look away from me too much in a way that could be reversibly dealt with with make-up and plucking.

>>5390999

okay, will do. thank you for your input :)

if I've been on hormones for 5 months is a testosterone level of 326 ng/dL really bad? my doctor upped my dose to 200mg Spiro and 4mg e last month because my t levels were in the 600s so it was cut in half after a month. will it go down to the right levels after this month? should I have anything to worry about? pretty unhappy because I feel at 5 months my t levels should be in female ranges...

>been on estradiol valerate 4mg/day for the last week now (today is day 7)
>realize glans is constantly moist and lubricated, even when I'm not aroused

Is this normal? Has anyone else experienced this? Is it my body's way of trying to mimic the natural female lubrication? I'm uncircumcized FWIW.

>>5390934
Wait so if you're unsure about what needs changing the surgeon can help with that?

>>5391475
if the surgeon doesn't have an eye for what needs doing, they shouldn't be doing surgery.

>>5391584
Oh right, that's good to hear, I thought you had to have a clear idea of what you'd like to change.

>>5391403

i also experienced this for the first 3 months or so. it will go away, no worries

>>5391663
>it will go away
But I don't want it to. It makes me feel super-girly. :(

>>5391677

>presperm coming out of your penis
>girly

pick one. it's annoying as hell, i was dripping so much i had to wipe it away so often. how can you enjoy this?

I want to buy Pueraria Mirifica off Amazon to increase the size of my ass.
Will this work?
I'm skinny right now so I wanted to use this supplement, start running and drinking a lot of coke.
Good plan?

>>5391741

uselessaia wastifica.

>I feel normal in girl's clothes, lipstick and longer hair with shaved skin
>In the mirror, I think I look more like myself and normal, if not only a little strange
>BUT, see a mtf on YouTube in a music video or Caitlyn Jenner on TV and I'm instantly mortified, humiliated and full of shame

Am I just an asshole, overconfident or is this normal?

not trolling this is a serious source of worry to me

>>5392130
unless they're passing. This only happens with unpassing mtfs. I think maybe its just echoing my own fears of not passing but I need a second opinion

>>5392130
trannies in the media are freaks that probably aren't trans and shouldn't be representing us.
they're disgusting.

>>5392183
yesss thank you. That makes me feel better.

>>5392055
What should I do then? I don't want to visit a doctor and tell him I need a better ass.

Doesn't it at least have a slight effect?

okay
so
sometimes I really dislike being a guy
most of the time I can deal with it though
sometimes it makes me cry and shit, but most of the time I'm normal
sometimes I think and wonder about what it would be like to be a girl, and that makes me happy
What am I?
>inb4 you're a degenerate
>inb4 "normal people don't think about that stuff, anon"

>>5392358
Do you want tits?

>>5392358
Being able to deal with your problems sometimes doesn't mean you're fine.

I feel dysphoria every waking moment. I feel that if I told someone how I felt (not that I would), they'd fucking despise me and be disgusted by me. This makes me feel that someone can only like me if I present a mask of something more desirable to the outside world rather than like me for who I truly am. I don't have or even attempt to make any friends due to this alongside social anxiety. I can't transition in my current situation (I don't want to go into details) and I likely won't be able to transition for a very long time, not that I'd have the courage to anyway. Thanks for reading my pity party blog post.

>>5392358
How often are we talking when you say "sometimes"?

>>5391741
>>5392200
no. stop being a lazy faggot and run and do your squats. there isn't a magic butt pill

Am I fucked?
>18
>male
>bi almost gay
>socially awkward
>I don't have real friends (irl)
>almost no interaction irl with girls because I'm not really interested in girls and I have very bad experience with few of them
>but I want to be a girlTHAT faggy
>depressed as hell, almost suicidial
>cutting myself on a regular basis
>don't want to be male
>too scared to transision
>hate my dick
>literary want to cut it off
>too scared of SRS

Second question
I badly need a new hairstyle.
Could you give me some example of hairstyle that is cute but doesn't reflect this that I'm complete faggot? (my hairs are about 10cm long)

>>5392958
you should transition imo desu

My feelings of dysphoria come and go. It started last summer with me feeling very out of place with my body, then it went,then came back again in May. It lasted a month or so then went and now its finally back.
I don't know what to do...

>>5393045
see post above yours

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Is it possible to achieve this body type with just hormones if I start relatively young? I just want to be a qt animu girl ;_;

Anybody have any recommendations for an inexpensive online therapist?

I'm aching for my letter so I can start T but I live in a rural as shit area, there are no gender clinics or gender therapists (or general therapists willing to write me my letter) ANYWHERE around here.

>>5392428
If you're asking if I'm comfortable with my body, then no, not really.
Surely there's got to be more to it than
>Do you want tits? Yes or no?
>>5392715
I don't know, I guess "once in a while" fits better.

>>5393286
Nobody has a body like that anon

>>5393875
Well, I guess mostly what I'm interested in is big tits, a small waist, a large ass, and an overall 'cute' look. What about that?

>>5393286
If you start at like 10 years old there's a slim possibility

>>5393508
>inexpensive
good luck

i don't think it'd be unreasonable to just mass-mail a bunch of random therapists from anywhere who seem decent to see if they would do video chat sessions

i've been meaning to ask mine because i moved and never did anything

>>5393286
only if you start hormones at 12

otherwise you might as well just flush hormones down the toilet if you start after that age because they won't work

>>5391700
this
it's a fucking nuisance

Im currently 21, slim and somewhat cute.Is there any hope if I start taking E ?

>>5394356
>>5394318
Shit. Is there really no hope after that age, or is it just a probability thing?

>>5394412
A cis woman looking like that without surgery is basically winning the lottery. A trans woman looking like that is like winning the lottery five times in a row. You can definitely pass post-puberty but you aren't going to transform into a voluptuous anime MILF

>>5394405
There's always hope! But genetics is the most important thing for post-adolescence, and you sound pretty well off in that regard

>>5394412
Well you can still be cute and/or attractive. It really depends on genetics, good hygiene, being on hormones for a long time, and weight management(loss and gain).

Here's the thing though: the later you delay the less you'll get out of your genetics. If you're still in your teens to 20s then just do something about it if you want it so bad. That body type you showed is very rare among natal females. You need stop with an expectation of body type. You can still look nice but it will take a lot of work on your part. Hormones aren't going to do it themselves. You need to strive to be pretty and not be lazy about it. It's not too late yet to enjoy being a young woman but it will be if you have an unrealistic expectation for yourself and not do anything about if that's the only thing you want.

>>5392958
No, but it will take some work.

>>5393045
Find a gender therapist, and get the ball rolling. Figure out how trans you are, and how much you need to transition. Not all transgenders need to transition, sometimes just minor things can make one feel better. Even those that need transitioning, may not need to go all the way. In fact few do.

>>5393508
You may wish to google for
>therapist transgender skype low cost
and see what you can find. A number of lists came up when I did.

I got a few questions.
Do I need to be diagnosed as trans? or can I self medicate? and will this affect when I get my name and sex changed on passport and drivers license?
I'm trying to get in to see my physician to maybe have him refer me so i can transition. Because I've tried finding a gender therapist on my own and not had any luck.

How long on HRT will I know I made the right choice, or a horrible mistake?
I know I'm trans, but maybe having second thoughts about going on HRT

>>5394845
no, yes, yes

I want to start hormones as soon as possible and possibly get FFS through my insurance if they cover it (I don't know). My gender therapist is key in both of this. Should I talk about suicide with her, which is very much real in my life? Would it expedite or detract from my goals?

I'm uncomfortable being called a girl. Despite this, I really wish to be one, and I honestly believe I was born the wrong sex. What does this mean?

>>5394848
It depends.

You probably aren't going to just suddenly "know". If you're getting less dysphoria or otherwise feel better then that's a good thing.

>>5395407
Why does it make you uncomfortable?

Is there like a general questionnaire in regards to how to find out what I am?

Kinda got out of a deep relationship and I used to dress but didn't go deeper out of fear. I kind of want to explore myself but kind of don't know if it is more of a fetish than something more.

>>5395734
My best guess as to why is because I don't look like a girl. I still can't make sense of it, though.

>>5395071
Yes It will affect changing documentation? I hear passport is easiest, and my state should issue a corrected DL. But do I really need a Doctor's Excuse? can I just go to the doctor after self medicating for a while and say "hey doc see I'm trying to be a girl, I need you to write me a letter"?

>>5395787
I lived a very similar experience. I jumped from relationship to relationship for years, did the same as you dress up in private, makeup, but always hid it from everyone even my gfs. Never took time for myself to figure out what I was.

This is a good place for you to figure it out, ask away

>>5395787
Let me whip some up. Precaution: these are just off the top of my head and do not represent any sort of official diagnostic criteria

Given the choice, would you rather be male or female?
If you had the option to take a pill and wake up as a cis female, would you take it? Everyone would act as if you've always been a girl, but the change will be irreversible
Same question as the above, but your family and friends etc would remember that you used to be male. Would you still do it?
If you were stranded on a desert island and a lifetime supply of mtf hormones washed up on the beach, would you take them?
Imagine yourself as a successful man, then imagine yourself as a poor, struggling woman. Which is more appealing?

>>5395918
See I can answer yes to all those questions. But I am still so doubtful of my interest here. Last night I went to an adult shop and spoke with the clerk there for hours about dressing and clothes. I even tried on a cute corset...trying being operative here since I am far too large...but it just kinda made me hate my body more. Even that though I don't know if it's like'not a woman' hate or 'jesus fuck I'm a whale' hate...

>>5396094
Maybe try losing some weight and then seeing how you feel about your body? You sound pretty trans to me though senpai

>>5396094
if you really have doubts in that respect, why not try losing weight first, then seeing if you still feel like you really want to transition?
if you're overweight now and all you do is jump on hormones, you'll be an overweight woman too.

>>5396106
That is my next stop I think.I work a desk job and have like no willpower to stick with a workout plan or diet. I found that 'trap mode' infographic...is that still decent?

>>5396124
>I work a desk job and have like no willpower to stick with a workout plan or diet
Count calories
Count calories
Count calories
Count calories
Count calories

>>5396143
i've been wanting to see that infographic for a while, are you able to post it?

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>>5396148
Here you go!

Does anybody know about SRS? I would like to get surgery there but will a small genital make it any harder? Is it true Suporn has a better method dealing with this?

>>5396153
merci

>>5396153
The semen bit gets me every time.

Where can I get hormones on my own? without going to a doctor, I plan to self medicate but have no idea where to get the stuff. Spiro and Estradiol are good right?

>>5396226
on the internet

>>5396254
Yeah, but what are some trusted sites? theres alot of crap on the internet too.

>>5396340
sorry for being obtuse. i hear inhousepharmacy is good. US hq but ships worldwide from vanuatu, check whether there are problems with customs seizures in your country.

>>5396226
Qhi.co.uk if in Europe for less trouble with customs.
Inhousepharmacy or alldaychemist if in the US.
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1zZQyrinhLsl2FWY9XI_bk3RtqSP94a8h-ZFvYBzcfIE/edit#gid=0 You can't really go wrong with this, but do your homework Anon. Good luck!

Non-transitioner here.
Can anyone recommend some psychiatric medication for gender dysphoria except antidepressants (I'm on tons of them)?

>>5396841
Wait, are you saying there's a cure for gender dysphoria that doesn't involve transition? You know things I don't.

>>5396868
I didn't say cure, just something that helps somewhat.

>>5396841
Alcohol

When I told my friend I was trans they asked if I played as female characters in video games when given the option. It's not something I really thought about but looking back I always did this. I guess it just felt more comfortable. Did anyone else do this?

>>5397010
Always. I even forced myself to use more male champions in League of Legends cause I was insecure that all the ones I thought were coolest were female

>>5397010
I've always had a leaning preference for female characters in videogames and would play as them given the chance more often than not.

>>5397010
Most cis guys play as female character because a) they want to experience female privilege in mmos or b) they want to stare at a woman's ass while playing
But regardless I don't think it means much

>>5397089
most cis guys who play as female characters*

>>5397010
I played female characters nearly exclusively, but now that I'm transitioning and accepted myself, I've become more okay playing male characters. It's weird.

>>5397089
do you honestly think so with the latter point? honestly?
do you really think guys are all so lecherous that they'd be able to get a kick out of staring at the same graphic rendering of a backside and never get bored of it?
call me a low test beta faggot and put me on hrt, but i don't feel that's entirely honest.

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>>5397118
>>5397089
Some guys just like staring at cute girls. I like BEING a cute girl so I play as a cute girl. I've pretty much always chosen girl characters to play as or girls for an avatar for any social media, but I've met enough cis guys who do the same that I'm not sure it's significant. Or maybe they weren't cis but I didn't know.

>>5397103
it's called being sane, anon

>>5397118
I've seen guys say that several times, yes. Granted I don't know how common it is, though.

Reminds me how my sisters teased me because I had a character with big tits in Dofus. I didn't even pay attention to that, let alone realized I was expected to like big tits. It didn't even occur to me why I picked a female character to represent me.

>>5397144
maybe having/playing female avatars/characters allows for more freedom of expression? generally speaking for the last couple of hundred years, society has been more permissive of women dressing up and personalising their look.
black tie be damned, men should be allowed to peacock like back in the old days.

>>5397162
I go for characters with big tits because I like them and I want to have them myself!
>>5397166
>maybe having/playing female avatars/characters allows for more freedom of expression?
I dunno about that, guys have plenty of room to do what they want, especially nowadays.

Hey i have someone legit to talk to cause i just recently discovered my hidden desires to be a mtf but the problem is i have straight roomates so is there ways i can actually take hormones and what are the best and what are the cheapest c as use i have a budget plz help

>>5397182
Yeah I don't even care about having tits, outside of the purpose of having sex. Sounds much more appealing than humping things.
Come to think of it I really can't think of any reason why a female character represents me better. It just does.

>>5396388
wow thank you!
the way I'm reading that chart, jsut to clarify Is it saying i shouldnt take estrogen for the first 6 weeks?

>>5397010
>>5397013
>>5397016
>>5397089
>>5397096
>>5397103
honestly I dont see this as a justifiable evidence on anyones gender identity, I've played as both, usually female but sometimes I want my character to be male. and some games dont give you a choice. Never bothered me

What are recommended Hormones I should take if I order my own, without a dr?

>>5395874
depends on the doctor, but no place will ever let you change your documents just because you claim to be taking hormones on your own without any kind of medical approval

>>5397381
I haven't really been able to see myself humping things. It just seems so weird and I feel like I'd get tired after like 3 thrusts.
I feel like personally I better empathize and immerse myself with female characters. I know SJWs like to call videogames male power fantasies, well typically for me it's a fantasy about being a badass girl.
>>5398228
We could use like, Mass Effect as a good example. I feel like the choice of gender was more who you would prefer for the protagonist, not who you wanted to be. I picked male Shepard on my first run because I thought that's how he's supposed to be and I liked his voice, but then I started self inserting as femshep every other time I played it. Playing male Shep didn't make me cis, I just liked him.

>>5396124
so eat less if you really don't feel like exercising. that's literally all there is to it. it's not rocket surgery

>>5396340
if only there were some kind of repository of information at the beginning of every single thread that holds the answers to questions that are asked in every single thread

>>5393912
A woman with such body would be anything but cute.

>>5398462
Really? I think Aria is really cute!

>>5397335
>>5398254

see >>5398411 and >>5390148

>>5391162
anyone? :|

>>5392916
I'm going to take them anyway, faggot.

Fuck you and the police.

How long does it take for packages from IHP to leave Vanuatu?

>>5398936
Few days to a week. Sometimes they surprise me how fast it gets here, don't worry too much

>>5399156

The reason I ask is because on the seventh they said the shipment was being prepared, which makes this the beginning of the ninth day.

>>5399197
Oh eww. I have been suspicious a few times when I started ordering about it taking forever, but I've never had an order never show up. Unless customs doesn't like it, you'll surely get it in time.

could use some help here >>5396836

Dude, I don't wanna deal with all this bullshit. Why aren't we a hundred years in the future where body swapping is easy? I don't wanna pay someone a bunch of money so I can figure out whether or not my feelings, both past and present, actually fit this ambiguous definition of dysphoria. I just want to be a fucking woman. Fuck.

>>5398923
do what you want, it's your money. it's also a complete waste

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>>5399377
I know the feeling. I wouldn't have any doubts about my gender if I had just been born a girl.

closet mtf anon with the asshole sister from last thread here

>usually have really good relationship with mother
>since I came home for xmas she keeps voicing her displeasure at me wearing my hair in a ponytail and how it makes me lool feminine and how that's bad
> I've never heard her this passive aggressive or intolerant of my or anyone else's appearance before
>scared I'll lose the one positive family relationship I have and somebody who is a big part of my life
>also when I got out the bath tonight my sister literally said "jesus anon, you literally have tits, are you taking hormones to become a woman or something?"
> IVE ONLY BEEN ON HORMONES 6 WEEKS BUT IM ALREADY GETTING GROWTH
> SHE ALWAYS MAKES DISPARAGING AND HOMOPHOBIC ETC. COMMENTS AT ME SO I CANT TELL WHETHER SHE KNOWS OR IS JUST BEING SNARKY
am I even in the closet anymore?

Guess the fact I was wearing a pink choker and a pink tshirt as well as the ponytail when my dad picked me up from uni didn't help

apologies for any typos and shit, parents live out in the countryside so no internet, only mobile.

>>5399994
>wearing a pink choker in public
Anon come on now.

>>5395918
>Given the choice, would you rather be male or female?

Definitely female

>If you had the option to take a pill and wake up as a cis female, would you take it? Everyone would act as if you've always been a girl, but the change will be irreversible

Yes please

>Same question as the above, but your family and friends etc would remember that you used to be male. Would you still do it?

Maybe. It's what I'm struggling with at the moment. I feel like I want to be a woman but I am afraid to tell anyone because I think they'd think I'm a freak or laugh at me. It feels a bit ridiculous considering I AM a man and was born so.

>If you were stranded on a desert island and a lifetime supply of mtf hormones washed up on the beach, would you take them?

No because I know nothing about dosages and would kill myself with hormones. But if I did know how to self med, yes

>Imagine yourself as a successful man, then imagine yourself as a poor, struggling woman. Which is more appealing?

Poor, struggling woman

So am I trans 4chan?

>>5395918
>Imagine yourself as a successful man, then imagine yourself as a poor, struggling woman. Which is more appealing?

I think this one is kind of silly because personally I think if you get the right person you can make the best out of any situation and find success. There's certainly ways to become successful out of poverty at least.

>3 months on hormones
>endo visit
>asks me to take my top off to see my breasts
>touches them

Normal right?

>>5400013
I mean usually I look enough of a fag that it's not incongruous, but I had been planning on trying macho up for seeing my parents

guess it just doesn't come naturally anymore, it didn't register I shouldn't have worn that stuff until he mentioned it

>>5400039
If they just wanted to molest people they would have chosen another specialty

>>5390148
Do you need to take spiro until surgery or is it only needed at the beginning?

>>5400099
It is required to take some form of anti-androgen until you get an orchidectomy och sex reassignment surgery. At which point you can also lower your estrogen dosage.

>>5400049

Sure, unless you have a fetish for trannies.

Is there any free online place where you can get some professional help with your of being unsure if you are a tranny or not?

Just some place where you can write a huge wall of text that someone professional reads and gives you their professional opinion.

>>5400032
Well those are definitely answers to be concerned about

>>5400039
My endo always asks to see my boobs. It's kind of weird but I guess she's using it as a measure of progress?

>>5400035
more to the point it's silly because it assumes that if we don't transition, we'll still manage to hold our mental health together enough to be successful as men.

>>5400358
i've had a lot of experience with psychiatrists already, even without tackling gender identity.
they're full of shit, honestly, their professional opinion isn't worth its weight in salt, they don't know you like you know you, or your friends, or your family.

>>5400476
anon who posted that here

>more to the point it's silly because it assumes that if we don't transition, we'll still manage to hold our mental health together enough to be successful as men.
That's the point of the question. If someone is trans then they wouldn't find life as a man appealing at all, no matter how well it goes. I made the questions for questioning people to reflect on, not for people who already know they're trans

>>5400358
bump I'm interested too

What's the best workout for losing weight and getting a more feminine body? I'm not fat (maybe a tad chubby in the belly area) but I'm out of shape and want to have a skinner body.

>>5400932
cardio, squats, glute ham raises, hyperextensions, anything that builds your ass up really, more cardio.

Is there such thing as estrogen blockers without prescription (legally)? Would the ones for cis men work on me?

Fuck, is there anything, even if just a bit, for FtMs that doesn't fucking require me 4 or more years of waiting and me constantly being checked for fucking validity not to mentioning they could get taken away as ~profeshunuls~ see fit? So tired of this fucking trash place. Fucking fuck. Fuck.

I know working out is a huge boost but having mild fibromyalgia really doesn't blend well with that.

Fuck.

What was the point that you realized you were trans? As in when were you completely sure, because I'm not.

Also I think my parents would disown me if I were to transition.

>>5401157
Took three years before I was sure. I've thought about this so much that the questioning seems trivial now.

>>5401157
When I had a really bad episode during one semester where I could only force myself to eat macaroni & cheese, lost like 50 lbs and spent all day crying in bed and wanting to die, squeezing my legs during exams wishing their was a vagina there, holding back tears every time I looked at the girls walking around

>>5401588
Did you get a vagina in the end? How are you now

>>5401800
I plan to eventually but that's probably a little ways off. I'm only 6 months on HRT right now. I went through official channels instead of self-medding so it took a little longer than I would have liked to get started. I've got a boyfriend now though!

>>5401804
Wow, is it difficult finding one? I've worried about basically ending up single forever once I begin. Also, congrats on beginning HRT :)

So I tried to get hormones online. But the sites required a prescription. Is there any way that I can avoid this or go to another site?

>>5401903
You're at the same stage as me. Ugh, what should we do. How certain are you that this is what you want to do?

>>5401931
100% sure. I've been waiting to do this for a long time but now that I can and everywhere I checked required a prescription, I have no idea what to do now.

>>5401903
>>5401931
I've never gotten hormones online but I think what people do is select the "I'll fax my prescription later" option, then they just send you the meds anyway


maybe you should get a prescription though :^)

>>5401944
Can they get in trouble for doing that? Or has anyone? It's not that I can't get a prescription easily, given I live in Boston. But it's that it's going to take too long.

If I'm very hairy and masculine, past 25, should I give up? mostly I wonder if there's a permanent depilation method that doesn't cost a fortune.

>>5401949
HRT changes body hair to a female pattern, but it takes a while. It does the same for muscle and fat distribution, so regarding being "too masculine" or whatever, the only thing you have to worry about is skeletal structure (not that that isn't an issue)

>>5401903
https://www.qhi.co.uk/

Are you supposed to always take spiro at the same time as estradiol

>>5403086
I'm not actually sure, but why wouldn't you?

>>5401949
Don't give up without trying. If you don't look acceptable (to your standards after roughly two years), then you can always kill yourself.

I've started job searching recently. I'm on HRT but I plan on staying in boymode until I've been on 'mones for longer and possibly after FFS (already have money for it). Will potential employers be able to see my medical records, see that I have a gender dysphoria diagnosis and not hire me based off that? I'm pretty feminine and timid already so I don't think it'd take much to figure out I'm transitioning

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I've been seeing an endo for non-gender related stuff for the past few years and wanna bring up the possibility of starting HRT. What's the best way to ask about informed consent/procedures for getting on HRT? Is there anything I should do to seem more convincing? I'm a little worried since last time I saw this doc I was still going by my birth name/pronouns.

Someone please ease my stupid nerves : [

>>5403265
Tell them you have very strong transgender feelings and want information about getting on HRT. It's not complicated, it's just your nerves making it seem like a bigger obstacle than it is.

>>5392570
Are you me? I feel the exact same way. I keep telling myself I should come out to my family or at least my mom when I go home for Christmas, but I know I'll probably pussy out again. Not looking forward to being called "son," "bro," or boyname about fifty times a minute. Anyway, hugs anon. You're not alone.

I've been on hormones for about a week and a half now, is it normal for my nipples to be a bit sensitive?

It -seems- like they're more sensitive, but I can't tell if they really are or if it's just the placebo effect.

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How reliable/dangerous/expensive is self-medding? What are some good resources to help me do it with less risk? Most resources I've seen try to dissuade from doing it, but I won't be able to geto therapist and get hormones for another several months, and I'd like the input of people who may have been there at some point.

>>5404864
It's dangerous because you might have some kind of allergy to the remedies or some problem on your liver/thyroid/some other place hormones act directly. It's not expensive at all since you will only need to buy the hormones and anti androgens, which are fairly cheap. The expensive part will come later with surgeries (or sooner, if you decide to not DIY).

>>5404940
>(or sooner, if you decide to not DIY).
I'd like to see some reasonable cost comparisons. I think going the legit route might be cheaper in the long run if insurance covers your HRT, which it does for me. Blood tests are expensive, but the 'mones are pocket change

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>>5404945
Oh yeah, sure, but I can only talk from my experience. I don't have insurance and I have to pay for hormones with pocket money (but again, the meds aren't that expensive for me). I spent a fuckload of money with therapist, psychiatrist, endocrinologist and the shitload of exams he asked before prescribing the hormones. Sometimes I think I should have DIY'd and used the money for FFS or whatever.

>>5404940
>>5404945
>>5404951
It'd probably be cheaper for me since I'm Canadian and I'm pretty sure my provincial insurance covers HRT and I think SRS, but it doesn't cover therapists and travel to actually go to a therapist. But I won't be back in Canada for a few months, after which I'll ne financially drained and then I still have to go through three months of therapy.

>>5401144

I couldn't find you any estrogen blockers online. Whether estrogen blockers for cis men work for you might depend on how it works in the body. But if you mean those bottles sold as supplements to lifters, I think you need to be a bit skeptical of what it says on the packaging. Lots of supplements are known to be placebo.

The only thing I found for sale online that could reduce your estrogen levels is decapeptyl. I don't know much about it except that depending on dose it could last quite a while (lupron, a drug in the same class, can last 6 months with one large injection.) Drugs in the class act like the hormones that lead estrogen and testosterone to be made, so by flooding your body with them, it becomes insensitive to the hormone. Going down the chain, that means your body won't make estrogen because the hormones that are part of its production aren't produced either.

US: http://www.unitedpharmacies.com/Decapeptyl-Triptorelin.html
UK: http://www.unitedpharmacies-uk.md/product.php?productid=1838&cat=&page=1

>>5401144
>>5405220

I forgot that there's also a surge in sex hormones in the beginning when your body still responds well to gonadotropin releasing hormones.

Why do i want to fuck a trans so bad? I love my women but am very attracted to beautiful trannies.

>>5405486
Cause you like women and (I'm assuming) penises

I bought my first hormones!
I'm so excited!

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I've been having a lot of dark thoughts lately and it's beginning to affect my work and social life. I brought this up in another thread but didn't get much response, so I figured I'd go into more detail here.

>Be 14/15
>Realize bi, fall in love with best friend, spend five years trying to get with him only for it to blow up in my face
>Try dating other people, can't make any progress with anyone because I can't get over what happened with him
>Miss several opportunities to lose the v-card, twice with guys and four-five times with girls
>Can't into sex because I hate my body
>Be 21
>skinny as fuck, medium height, good build to turn into girlmode with
>Realized I was trans earlier last spring after some shit went down and my body went an-hero
>Tried to repress it, knew the implications if I came forward with it
>Decide to not transition and instead go into a hyper-masculine career I've always been interested in
>Enroll in trade school, almost all guys, most not well-educated
>Get through program, near the end now (grad is next month), not thinking about trans stuff
>Another old friend comes out as trans about a week ago
>Begin thinking about transition again
>Realize I can't keep repressing it, and it's not going to go away
>Can't tell anyone at school or work, only a handful of people know
>Everyone else makes gay jokes and sex jokes all the time, can't really tell them my own thoughts without being ostracized
>They frequently refer to me as a "motherly" or "girly" figure without me even coming out to them
>They don't realize the irony
>Just want to be exactly the things they say, but can't admit that
>Shaved my face a week ago, they told me I looked better with stubble and without it I look like a pedophile
>Start shaving my body in secret (again)
>Can't ever achieve public girlmode
>This has been stuck on my mind for a week now, couldn't sleep at all the other night and ended up crying on the sofa because I'm a bitch

Cont.

>>5405643

This has been messing me up for some time now. I was doing great in school up until the last two weeks or so, and then I just started losing interest because I can't stop thinking about transitioning. My finals and grad are both coming up soon, and I should be putting out job apps for my field but I've hardly been focusing on any of it. Something I've wanted to go into for years is being jeopardized simply because I can't get my own thoughts under control. I've been cutting back on my hours at work as well, even though this is the time of year when my job is at its busiest. Whether at work or school all I think about is whether or not I'm actually trans and how I'm scared to come out to anyone about this, and if I don't get it under control soon my career will be on the line. A friend of mine noticed how down I was the other day, asked me repeatedly about it, and I just told him it was "family issues" instead of the truth. I don't think it even has to do with my ex anymore, because I've more-or-less gotten over him by now. I just hate being male, I hate my body, and I hate that I keep having these thoughts that just won't go away.

How fucked am I, /thg/?

>>5405643
>>5405668
Try your hardest to think positively. Hold on and focus on school until you can make it to the finish line. Start taking whatever small steps you can towards transitioning and use them as sources of motivation and confidence. You can still make a happy life for yourself!

Does anyone have advice for not getting tons of ingrown hairs after shaving your legs? I've tried exfoliating and using Nair instead of shaving without much success.

>>5405686
I don't know. I've tried everything for shaving and I always get ingrown hairs popping up once it starts growing back. I'm gonna bite the bullet and get a nice epilator for Xmas and see how that goes

>>5405682
I'm the same person in both posts, but thank you for the kind advice Anon. Please add a volume of at least 40% bleach to your next beverage. <3

>>5405679
I'm trying, I really am. I'm just glad Christmas break is coming up soon so I'll get out of school, but I'll still have work. I just need to get this sorted out by January or I'm screwed.

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>>5405696

>>5395812
I don't think your experience is all that rare; I feel the same way for similar reasons. The reason cis people are comfortable being referred to as their gender is that they identify as that gender (which is the case for trans people) and also are perceived as their gender to everyone else and always have been (which is not always the case for trans people). You're not going to want to feel like people are just humouring you by treating you as female, or that you're bothering them by making them treat you differently, or that you're really just "pretending" to be female. The fact that you're aware of it alone is significant, since cis people rarely think about this kind of thing and just naturally get treated as their gender, whereas trans people think about it all the time and often have to explicitly tell or ask people to treat them as their gender.

If you had been born female, would you be comfortable being referred to that way?

>>5403117
Do employers legally have access to your medical records where you are? I seriously doubt that will be the case unless the job requires it, or you live somewhere crappy that doesn't have laws against that kind of thing. In the UK you need to give the employer permission.

There are also anti-discrimination laws that prevent you from being turned down on the basis of being trans; again, assuming a decent country with laws for this kind of thing.

If your legal documents still say you're male or use a different name then they'll know something's up, but they still can't turn you down if you're protected by anti-discrimination laws.

>>5403117
>>5405826
Ignore the last sentence since you're still presenting as male.

>>5404304
yes

>>5405826
>Do employers legally have access to your medical records where you are? I seriously doubt that will be the case unless the job requires it, or you live somewhere crappy that doesn't have laws against that kind of thing. In the UK you need to give the employer permission.

Yeah, that's what I was wondering about, if they do or not

>There are also anti-discrimination laws that prevent you from being turned down on the basis of being trans; again, assuming a decent country with laws for this kind of thing.

lmao. Louisiana, USA

>>5405686
god, I have the same problem! I'm closeted and shaving them in secret, I'm hoping to start self med hrt then just get all my body hair lazered off because I hate it i've always hated it. i just want to be agirl and have no body hair

How do I go about asking a doctor for hormones? Like when the receptionist asks the reason for the appointment do I just straight up say "I'm a fag and want drugs" or what?

>>5406600
Hate to break it to you anon but 1) that would be extremely expensive 2) girls have body hair

>>5406600
HRT will eventually change body hair to a female pattern, though that doesn't mean you will be completely free of it. I mean, female individuals also have body hair.

>>5405629
congratulations!
one day I hope I'll be there too...

Alright heres the deal

Im not trans, but i do take hrt

I know you're going to argue with me and tell me i'm probably trans, but the point stands, i dont want to transition.

I just want to know when my breasts will stop growing. I'm 6 months in and they're really sensitive and hurt with any pressure, i cant sleep on my side or front, and i cant wear t shirts without a jacket without hunching

>>5407638
2-3 years or more. Basically as long as puberty lasts. I'm 5 years in and they still get sore sometimes

Sometimes I want to be a girl and transition, think about crossdressing and want to do it etc.
Other times just the thought of wearing "girl" clothes makes me embarrassed, maybe a little bit disgusted, I'm not sure, sometimes I think I'm okay with staying a guy too, if I don't become too masculine.

What the hell is wrong with me and what am I supposed to do if I change my mind so much about it?

>>5405629
Congrats!

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Sometimes certain people make me feel more like a guy when I'm around them.But then at the same time I want to be a girl. Or even that girl. And yet I'll also feel the need to do all the man stuff like protect them or whatever. Sometimes I even want to use my cock a bit. Sometimes I don't feel like I'm trans, or trans enough, but I also dont feel like I'm a guy either. I'm just some lost soul wandering around between the sexes. I'd take a genderless robot body if I could to be honest. I'm not that interested in sex and I could be literally no gender settling the quest of what the fuck am I.

>>5409089
something something non-binary. like me.
apparently we belong on tumblr.
at least we're not AGP transbians like all of the hons who hang out here.

I know that the "herbal hrt" stuff like red clover doesn't cause physical feminization like breast growth, but has anybody found that it just made them feel better somehow?

Don't know if trans, probably not, just thinking about dipping my toes in the water

Can estradiol be taken rectally?

I mean it's basically the same as taking it sublingually, right?

>>5406800
A doctor does not prescribe you hormones. I think you mean to say an endocrinologist. In that case, you can get a referral from the doctor to see the endo. You might also need a note from a therapist or psychologist detailing why you need hormones (e.g. diagnosed gender dysphoria).

>>5407809
Yeuch...

I hope they don't get too big, i quite like not having to bind -.-

So...I am in the part where I am still feeling things out. I haven't made any decisions yet...but it is hard to see all these awesome clothes and outfits but not have anyone to share them with.

>>5409753
>>>/fa/

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>>5411081
Bumping for losing hope I'll ever get this sorted out

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>>5411095
Mark me down for this, too. I don't want to deal with this transitioning bullshit and probably looking like a man in a dress for life. If there were an ounce of fairness in the world gender dysphoria wouldn't exist. I'm tired of this bullshit.

>>5411259
I dont even know if I have dysphoria anymore. I just dont feel much about my body. I know I dont like it but I just dont feel like I even care anymore.

>>5411095
>>5411259
It starts getting better once you start HRT

>>5398923
I use shatavari for that, but I wish I was a sexy brown skinned indian lady. But I know that it works for skin and hair for sure.

>>5407030
I'd be happy not to have butt hair.
How do you shave back there?
How can you let the lazer people see that without dying inside?

>>5409132
I take all of my water with spearmint as a stop-gap measure till I can afford insurance, and I dunno if it's plucking or what, but my moustache hair recently got all blond and harder to see.

>>5409099
>AGP transbians like all of the hons who hang out here
Eeech... Can we please stop shaming gay trans people?

And I say this as a mostly-straight transperson. Divided we fall, etc.

>>5411447
don't take me seriously. i don't take anyone else seriously when they assume just because i'm non-binary that i'm a self-entitled tumblr bitch.

>>5411278
I kinda feel the same way. But like I mentioned I'm just tired. I don't always feel dysphoria very intensely but it always comes back and I'm fucking done.

>>5411339
I really hope so. I'm gonna DIY this shit, fuck it. I need estrogen, dammit. Fuck testosterone.

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>>5411507
>I need estrogen, dammit. Fuck testosterone.

>>5411649
Anon, y u do dis? :'(

>>5411696
I am drunk and quite frankly in no emotional state to deal with this right now.

pre hrt neet here

there arent any gender therapists in my area that i could find so i think im gonna try and order pills online. I can only spare enough money to buy either estrogen or t blockers atm so im just wondering which i should i buy first

Ok so I want to just get my HRT hormones and do this myself, I'm looking at inhousepharmacy as recommended my someone here.
I'm ready to check out and now its telling me I need a prescription for the hormones. Do I really have to go to my doctor and tell him I'm trans in order to self med my HRT?
I'm not exactly comfortable coming out yet, I jsut want to get the ball rolling.

>>5411863
T blockers. E won't do much without them but anti-androgens will stop you from masculinizing any further.

Get a job though and try to start E a few months after. It's not healthy to not have a sex hormone

>>5411863
kinda the same boat here. I'm able to afford them though
>>5411866
This is me

>>5411868
I am on T blockers right now. i am taking 100 mg spiro and can't feel any difference. Should I jump it up to 200?

>>5411909
if you want to feel a difference, you need estrogen. you need to get it soon anyway.

>>5411866
try the .vu site there was no mention of a script needed last time I ordered

>>5411866
alldaychemist is legit too

>>5411945
I am on the .vu site. at check out it says "The following items you added to your cart require a prescription"

I thought it wouldnt require that.

>>5411956
I'll try that
thanks

>>5411967
.vu from what I've heard started requiring prescriptions for all new customers, but will continue supplying old customers

>>5412004
you mean where am I from? US.
ok well I would be a new customer. how do I bypass that?

>>5411956
they dont require a script do they?

>>5412039
nope
the shipping is always a flat 25 though

Okay, this is kind of a weird question.

Since I started taking 'mones, I'm surprised by how sweet my pee smells. It smells almost candy-like. Is that to be expected?

>>5412716
doesn't sound normal
maybe have your kidneys and blood sugar levels checked asap

>>5405686
>>5405693
exfoliation glove. epilation does not help, it just makes it take longer to come in

>>5409132
if you feel better with placebo, sure

>>5409145
only if it comes shooting out of a giant dildo, in which case it's about twice as effective as sublingual

>>5411866
>go to my doctor and tell him I'm trans in order to self med my HRT
i don't think you understand the concept of self medding

How do I remove hair from my behind? Even between the cracks and stuff? Alternatively can you kill me?

i just realized that i'm actually trans and i feel like such an idiot for not getting it eatlier
i'm already 21 years old, fuck me i'm running out of time

Did anyone else's dysphoria get worse after hrt?

>before hrt was indifferent to my penis, didn't like it or love it
>about 4 months hrt start hating it, realise I really want it to go whereas before I had no plans on doing anything with it

>>5413388
shave it in a mirror

>>5413388
epilator, my friend. yes it will hurt

>tfw don't want to give into disillusioning myself that transitioning medically will make into the cute guy I want to be
>tfw genes would probably give me an ugly face
>tfw at least vaguely cute when presenting as female

>>5413489
I was slightly ambivalent about SRS before HRT. I wanted a vagina but I was uncertain about the quality of surgeries and complications and stuff and didn't know if it was worth it. Genital dysphoria has gotten a lot worse after HRT, especially now that I have a boyfriend and we have to just awkwardly ignore my penis during sex, so I'm pretty damn sure I want the surgery done now. Other than that I've been feeling better about my overall appearance

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I week or so ago I asked if I should go to one of the monthly trans support groups near me. I went and it was pretty much what I expected; half hons and half "normal" people around my age who haven't transitioned yet. These 3-4 hons out of like 20 people were the ones talking for most of the time which made it really boring because I can't really relate to them. They're all in their 40s-50s, full women's clothing, pretty manly voices and faces. They all transitioned because of a mid life crisis (wife died, had cancer, wife left them). There was only one 32 year old who passed besides their voice.

The best part about this is when I got home, saw myself in the mirror and realized that I don't have to be like them, I can transition right now. I felt cute.

Pic sorta related, one guy looked like Bubbles.

>>5414296
What was your reason for going?

I should probably go to one, but I don't know why I would.

>>5414319
I wanted to know what to do from here, how to get hormones, ect. I though that this would probably be the best step to that though I didn't really learn much this time.

This was just the first time I went to one of these and I might go again, I have a month to decide. I would recommend going to one if it's available to you. Worst case you have to look at hons for a few hours. Best case you learn some new things and even make some friends.

>>5414296
In the whole time I've been on /lgbt/ I don't think I've ever seen someone posting about how support groups have been beneficial to them. I suppose 4chan users are generally not of the demographic that would particularly benefit from them nor that they're aimed at, and also that people are probably more likely to post about their experiences if they're bad than if they're good.

>>5411866
>>5413377
No I understnd it. but the site I wanted to order my hormones from should have not required a script for them. but they apparrently do. I dont want to go to the doctor about this I want to self med. do you see what i'm saying now?

anyways i'm gonna try the other site>>5411956
reccomended

>>5414296
>tfw have Bubble's hairline
kill me

>When I'm not aroused, my only qualm with having a penis is that I hate how it bulges in clothing, looks kinda ugly, and gets in the way
>When I am aroused, I don't mind touching my penis, but I find myself, with increasing frequency and power, wanting a vagina instead of a penis
>At all times, I would rather have female secondary sex characteristics
So where do I draw the line between having a fetish and having trans feelings?

>>5414748
Why do you want a vagina? Because of practical reasons or because of how you feel?

>>5414768
When I'm not aroused, more for practical reasons, but I do feel like I'd just rather have one given the choice. The confusing part is that when I am aroused, I like to imagine myself getting fucked or eaten out, so it's entirely feeling based. At the same time, the idea of being blown pretty much does nothing for me. Occasionally, though I feel like I want to fuck something. That's not a terribly common feeling for me though.

>>5414748
>my only qualm with having a penis is that I hate how it bulges in clothing, looks kinda ugly, and gets in the way
so you hate having a penis? there's not much left that a penis does non-sex related that one can hate, is there?
>When I am aroused, I don't mind touching my penis
according to people on here arousal can override dysphoria
well how "fetishy" do you feel? is everything related to being a woman sex related?

>>5414832
>so you hate having a penis?
I wouldn't go so far as to say I hate it overall. The bulge it can create is the only aspect of it I would say I hate. I would just trade it out for the other option if such a thing were possible. It's, like, most of the time I don't think about it too much - maybe only once or twice a day on average - and when I do think about it my feelings are pretty neutral and along the lines of, "well that's annoying."

>well how "fetishy" do you feel? is everything related to being a woman sex related?
Not very. Most of it's the typical trans feelings of not liking my body very much, being uncomfortable as a man in general, etc. I'm just worried those things are stemming from a fetish and aren't actually my real feelings since I haven't been conscious of these feelings my whole life.

>>5414867
>I haven't been conscious of these feelings my whole life.
how long? were there signs?
> I'm just worried those things are stemming from a fetish and aren't actually my real feelings
if there is no reason to think that this applies to you, you shouldn't worry about it. something about, "if you hear hooves clopping, think of a horse not a zebra" or something.
>well that's annoying
does that sound neutral to you?

how much do these trans feelings affect you in your daily life or sex life?

>>5414914
>how long?
I started considering this stuff shortly after first coming to this board last May/April. Somehow stumbled into a trans thread, saw some timelines, got this elated excitement when I realized it was possible to come out not looking butt-ugly and stayed up super late reading a bunch of related material.

>were there signs?
I've always had trouble thinking of things that could have been signs. I tend to play and pick female characters in games and stuff, sure, but lots of my other friends do too, and I doubt they're all trans. I've been envious of attractive women in the past, but that doesn't necessarily mean anything. The best I can come up with is this vague uneasiness and uncomfortability with my body that started around late middle school and stuck around afterward. I didn't look at girls or women and think, "Yeah I wanna look like that," until after coming to this board and looking at trans info, though. Hell, in high school I actually liked that I was growing body/facial hair, even though now I fucking hate it with a passion and shave it all constantly.

>if you hear hooves clopping, think of a horse not a zebra
That's a fair point, maybe I should just take my feelings at face value instead of overthinking them.

>does that sound neutral to you?
I meant more that my emotional state was neutral than I did my opinion, but you have a point.

>how much do these trans feelings affect you in your daily life or sex life?
Answering this would make the answer sound too obvious, that I think about these things constantly (daily), that it makes me sad to know I'm not a woman, that I've come to realize I dislike my body and am uncomfortable naked, that if I could press a button and change my sex, I would do so without second guess. But in the past I've been okay with a lot of aspects of being a guy, and felt good when I felt manly. But to answer your question, a lot.

Also >sex life
Nyet.

I guess if it really isn't a fetish, it's time for therapy.

>>5415014
>it's time for therapy.
absolutely! make sure to pick someone who is experienced with this stuff.
>but lots of my other friends do too, and I doubt they're all trans.
why did you pick these characters? the feelings you associate with this are important. your friends had their reasons for doing this.
>sex life
is this because of trans feelings or? you don't have to answer if it is too personal.
>But in the past I've been okay with a lot of aspects of being a guy, and felt good when I felt manly
idk, this is something you need to talk about with a therapist. it doesn't disqualify you in my book because i know too little about you but i am no expert in any way.
what aspects were they? did it suddenly change or was there maybe an indication? did you genuinely feel good about it?

you do sound trans, it doesn't sound like a fetish.

>I should just take my feelings at face value instead of overthinking them
this is important!!! i can't stress enough how important this is!

>>5415189
>why did you pick these characters? the feelings you associate with this are important. your friends had their reasons for doing this.
Playing male characters feels weird to me, while playing female characters feels normal. That wasn't always the case, I think I've switched over time. I remember in vanilla WoW the majority of my characters were male, but now the opposite is true. Now it's rare for me to ever make a male character when given the option. I like coming up with cool outfits and making my characters look good in general.

>is this because of trans feelings or? you don't have to answer if it is too personal.
It's hard to get me out of my shell, so it's generally tough for me to meet new people. It takes me a while to get comfortable around others I guess, so most of the time I just stay quiet and keep to myself. I'm also terrible at being the one to initiate anything; I'm much more reactive. I guess basically I'm beta as fuck. It's whatever though. I don't really care one way or the other about sleeping with someone I'm not in love with, so Im in no hurry.

>idk, this is something you need to talk about with a therapist.
For sure. Those things and the way I felt in the recentish past are the only things keeping me from believing I'm actually trans. They're part of the reason I had suspicions of this all possibly being a fetish instead.

Thanks for sticking around, by the way. Even if I know that ultimately, I need to speak to a therapist, it's nice to get some of these things off my chest beforehand and sort out a little of it prior to going.

>>5415014
Are you me?

I've never really been at ease with my body and especially my face. Looking at myself in a mirror always made me feel uncomfortable. I never pinpointed the reason why, and kinda accepted it as it was. My genitals never bothered me that much though.
I've never been interested in cars, sports and other hobbies usually linked with masculinity and I play mostly female characters in games because it feels "right". Though as you said I don't think this has do to with gender itself.

I've been looking at CD and trans related stuff for about a year and a half, just out of curiosity at first. I started CDing this summer, thinking it was just a kink. But I found myself to be more at ease wearing female clothes than male ones, and I now dress at home every time my roommates are out of town.

Recently I've been trying the "Look at yourself in a mirror and say out loud I'm a man/woman" thing from the pastebin. It's stupid and I feel like a degenerate, but it makes me feel incredibly happy to just look in a mirror and try to convince myself I'm a girl, and to think about what changes I would have to make if I wanted to pass. I've been daydreaming more and more about living a life as a girl, and that makes me feel happy too.

The fact that I never had these thoughts before and that CDing started as a kink make me think it's just a phase or a fetish. I guess I'll continue experimenting with femininity, clothes and makeup for a bit and go from here.

>>5415245
>Those things and the way I felt in the recentish past are the only things keeping me from believing I'm actually trans.
they are things you need to think about more. they are not things that definitely say you aren't trans. if everything else indicates transitioning would improve your life (i'm not trying to talk you into it, sorry if it sounds that way) then don't get hung up on some irregularities. everybodys story is different.

get a therapist asap. i hope you get this sorted out quickly and wish you good luck.

>>5415255
>I guess I'll continue experimenting with femininity, clothes and makeup for a bit and go from here.
you should visit a therapist in addition to that. someone who is experienced with gender issues.

>>5415255
>Looking at myself in a mirror always made me feel uncomfortable. I never pinpointed the reason why, and kinda accepted it as it was.
Holy shit this so much. Sometimes it's like I had forgotten what my face looks like, and it just feels really strange seeing it again.

>>5415306
>get a therapist asap. i hope you get this sorted out quickly and wish you good luck.
Definitely. And thanks! I appreciate your help/advice.

>>5415356
>you should visit a therapist in addition to that. someone who is experienced with gender issues.
Yep, definitely. Thanks for your replies to the other anon by the way, that was interesting.

I relate a lot to what this anon is saying so Im gonna kinda jump in too
>>5415014
>I started considering this stuff shortly after first coming to this board last May/April. Somehow stumbled into a trans thread, saw some timelines, got this elated excitement when I realized it was possible to come out not looking butt-ugly and stayed up super late reading a bunch of related material.
Why do you think that is? This is kind of the same for me. I was always kind of fine, I cant really say much about my past without my current biases interfering, but like you I was even excited about facial hair. As I started to mature and learn about this stuff though, my feelings changed and transitioning is basically the direction Ive wanted to take myself for some time. Im not really sure why this is. Most trans stories you hear people always knew. Instead it seems like something woke up or got triggered inside of me. It makes me wonder had I never known about this would I have been okay. I think the answer to that is probably, which worries me. I think I just kind of accepted my place and that I was a guy and girls were girls and back then I didnt know that could be changed without becoming a freak. Once I learned that could happen though... Ive always been jealous or envied guys who were super feminine, lacked bodyhair, could basically pass even though they werent trans. And I got jealous of girls that I could actually see myself being had I been born a girl too. These feelings of jealous and envy havent really come around as of late, but just a few months ago they would still happen.
>I've always had trouble thinking of things that could have been signs. I tend to play and pick female characters in games and stuff, sure, but lots of my other friends do too, and I doubt they're all trans.
This one is a weird one. Ive met a lot of guys who play girl characters as traps instead of girls. Some guys just like looking at pretty girls or making waifus for them to adore.

>>5415491
>last line continued
But as for myself? I become the girl I wish I was. In FFXIV everyone knows me as a girl, in Skyrim the Dragonborn is my girl, Mass Effect I was a girl. Its a nice little bit of escapism to live out an alternate life as an awesome girl I wish I was. It lets me forget about all this crap. So like that one anon said, its the feelings that caused you to pick the gender that matter. I like looking at pretty girls and being one. Id much rather be a tough girl than a tough guy. I wish I was one right now.
>It's hard to get me out of my shell, so it's generally tough for me to meet new people. It takes me a while to get comfortable around others I guess, so most of the time I just stay quiet and keep to myself. I'm also terrible at being the one to initiate anything; I'm much more reactive. I guess basically I'm beta as fuck. It's whatever though. I don't really care one way or the other about sleeping with someone I'm not in love with, so Im in no hurry.
That sounds a lot like me, Im pretty shy but I dont think its because of being trans. In fact it might get worse when I transition because Ill be so worried about not passing or being a freak.
>That's a fair point, maybe I should just take my feelings at face value instead of overthinking them.
Good luck there, Ill never be able to do that, I cant not overthink anything
>idk, this is something you need to talk about with a therapist.
Can someone give me a little bit of insight as to what its like with a good therapist? Im not sure how helpful mine is being. I kinda feel like Im getting nowhere.

>>5415491
>It makes me wonder had I never known about this would I have been okay.
more importantly is: are you okay now that you know about that stuff? no sense in going over different realities when this is the one you have to make decisions in.
> These feelings of jealous and envy havent really come around as of late
so you're feeling fine when you see women? have other feelings replaced these?
>I kinda feel like Im getting nowhere.
what do you mean?