Who wants a bear BF?
Only twinks for twinks in my area.
me, desu. im sick of twinks
Growlr here is a cesspool of the most unfortunate bear wannabes I've ever encountered.
Anyone notice that bears bareback more than twinks. Every time I fuck a twink he makes sure I have a condom, when I fuck a bear he usually just says something like, "you can go in bare just don't cum inside"
>>5312496
Well , I think that's a little bit reductive , and kinda a shame for these guys. Not fitting in any category must be fucking frustrating.
Plus , there is no bear around closest one is about 100+km. And I live in a fucking island.
I would like one. To go into more detail, I'd like one who were around my age, seeing as I don't particularly feel attracted - or even comfortable - with someone who is significantly older than me. Honestly, I don't mind if they even have much body-hair or not: I just want someone who is burly, masculine, stocky, muscled (to some degree - my ex-bf was what I believe is termed a musclegut, more or less), and white.
Then again, I'll never find anyone again: there are such low changes that I'll find, for one, someone who I find physically attractive enough to want; second, someone who finds me physically attractive as well, and third, that we both are compatible emotionally. Too far of a stretch.
I had my chance with my ex, and blew it, and now I'll be alone the rest of my life.
>>5312532
I feel the same way. It's impossible to find people around my age that aren't a twink or a flaming college prep with a hairdo like Gary Oldman from The Fifth Element.
I'm attracted older guys because they're more mature and they don't try to act like a stereotype. Yet, that wouldn't work for a relationship because the age gap would cause a conflict of interests somewhere down the line. They're also more likely to see me as a sex toy than a human being.
My ex was the only person I've ever met with similar ideals. He left me for a twink.
>>5312496
This is probably the most brutal and succinctly accurate description I've ever read in terms of my experienced on growlr, and chances are we live no where near each other.
>>5312496
To be fair, a lot of us on Growlr may not be bearish ourselves but are seeking bears... and there just so happens to be a bear shortage.
I want to be a bear
>>5312589
At least you knew why your ex left you. My ex gave me a 'reason' that - looking back now - was probably just an excuse for what he didn't want to tell me.
It's sad.
>>5312636
Oh no, don't get me wrong, he denies that it was a physical reason for leaving me. And he didn't leave me for anyone in particular. But we were best friends. It was our first relationship for both of us, and we connected on just about every level. He broke up with me after a conversation about celebrities we were attracted to. He said he was into the Justin Bieber type, I said that was gross to me, and he broke up over text later that day after sitting on it for six months after I had already fallen deeply in love. It was pretty obvious why he broke it off, especially since he said he wants to go back to us being friends and hanging out all the time, just without the cuddling. Right.
End of rant.
>>5312645
A man with some sort of body mass, whether it be muscle or fat, and some sort of body or facial hair. Personality traits usually being very masculine but not always.
>>5312709
Similar. He broke up because he said a comment I made about 'poor people' had insulted him. I don't believe it one bit. We were so close, and I had conversations where he'd told me I was his reason for being alive and all that. Hell, I remember the night he broke up, he didn't even want to give me a reason at first.
He wanted to go back to being friends. Didn't work out. I ended up telling him that we should stop talking, since I felt incredibly depressed every time we talked. He said "okay, bye, good luck". I tried to contact him afterwards: it failed badly.
Life is terrible.
>>5312645
Honestly I'm not some sort of elitist, there's enough of that clique bs in the gay community as it is. There are however, a few traits that in my mind make a bear a bear that have sort of been distorted or just ignored over time. Call me a stereotype but I'm gonna use Ben Cohen as what I consider a perfect example of what a bear is, just on a visual level. He's big and muscular but but not ripped, he's hairy and he's got a beard. All three are hallmarks of "bear" in my mind. Now I know he's a pro athlete and my own personal wet dream so that is a high standard but that's why I would pick him as the BEST example.
I don't expect everyone to look like him and I don't think someone has to have all the traits i mentioned to be called a "bear". That would be dumb. But when someone has none of the traits, I find it hard to see the the connection. I admire and enjoy the general inclusive attitude, but somehow "bear" became to some a catch all term to any obese man.
>>5312760
I put him in the No Contact Zone for now. I told him I'd get in touch with him sometime later, whether it be a week or a year, when my head has cleared. I can't see that happening for that very reason you said, I can see the depression setting in all over again once I see him in person, and all the healing will be for nothing.
Funny thing is, on topic, I always said I'd only be with someone with bearish qualities. He was basically a twink in a fat guy's body. I don't dig feminine guys. But we were compatible every way other than that. I even thought about going back to him with the idea of having an open relationship so he can get the twink fucking out of his system and I can get the bear fucking out of my system, but I figured the rejection would be a bad note for me to end on.
>>5312814
Basically an anti-twink. That's my definition.
>>5312829
He said I was perfect for him (physically); he said he loved Latino guys, and said I was his ideal.
He was my ideal: a burly, muscled white guy, with blue eyes and shaved head. He looked like a skin-head, to be honest. Really handsome face. Well, at least you met him person: he was my internet bf - I met him on /r9k/, when I was in college.
There were plans to meet, but that got ruined by my parents, and by my own weakness in standing up to them. At least you got to touch him - sometimes, I still feel so much regret that I never got to FEEL him, and a part of me believes he wouldn't have left me if we'd met.
And open relationships are shit. You dodged a bullet. My ex- said if he caught me cheating on him, he'd use three bullets - one for me, for the other guy, and the last one for himself. Sounds extreme, but I liked that somebody actually wanted me that much.
Then again, his words were all fluff - he ended up leaving me, so you can imagine how flat his words sound to me now.
>>5312814
I want to taste every part of that body. O god just give me!!!!!
>>5312877
Ouch. Did you guys Skype at least, or did you only judge appearance based on photos? To be honest, while his opinion of you could have varied once he met you in person, the same can be said the other way around. It's hard to match a pen pal personality to a real person after you've known them for so long that way.
>>5312814
I have recently learned that I do not speak gay and it has become quite an impediment in searching for porn.
I am thus compiling a list of gay porn titles to English translation for those who share my problem:
Gay/English
Straight Boy Seduced = Fat old man records himself blowing prostitute
Straight Boys First Time = Two men deep kiss immediately and both suck dick like pros
Sexy Teen Wank= 95 pound guy who hasn't been exposed to sunlight in 8 years sits in front of webcam typing for 40 minutes in the dark without audio
Straight Fraternity Hazing= Six homosexual men stand around screaming "bro" every 10 seconds while acting out the imaginary lives of frat members
Straight Military Stud= Homosexual with buzz cut and tatoos
There are also a host of euphemism
Chub= fat
Bear= Fat and Hairy
Silver= Old
Daddy= Old and fat and hairy
Otter= Hairy
masc= The lisp and gesticulation are less noticeable and only come out when drunk or angry
Straight Acting= Acting
Apparently regular men don't enjoy a classification yet, while gym bunny has fallen into obselesence. "Fit" seems to have dual meanings depending on context, while 'height weight proportionate' means flabby and flaccid.
My biggest challenge has been trying to narrow down 'twink', which based on the observable evidence, seems to mean anything from any random 16 year old to 30 year old men with tweezed eyebrows, receding hairline, and a proclivity for facial make up intended for 45 year old women and picking clothes meant for high school students rather than teachers.
>>5312899
We Skyped - we talked with cameras, so we both saw each other in real time. We talked on the phone, too - we only used e-mail when we'd barely met.
>>5312905
10/10
>>5312407
no one
its something ugly people resort to when they give up trying to fuck decent looking people
>>5312905
It's painfully true.
