/lgbt/, femanon here. I need help with a delicate /lgbt/ related issue.
I think my little brother is a bit... off. I'll green text it.
> Live with parents for college.
> Me, mom, dad, two brothers 13 and 15.
> About 4 months ago some of my clothes start going missing.
> Think it's just the house eating them, like socks disappearing in the drier. They'll show up in a year or two.
> This continues, even till today. Not a lot of clothes, about one or two pieces every few weeks.
> About a week ago, get home from work, no one is home.
> Enter the house, music is blaring from one of the bedrooms.
> Go down the hallway, youngest brother's door is open.
> Peak in. He's dressed in my clothes.
> Wearing makeup.
> He's straddling a body pillow in front of a mirror, gyrating, running his hands through his hair.
> Ke$ha's tik tok is blasting at full volume.
> I nope the fuck out before he sees me.
> Leave the house and go to a gas station for a slushy and stay out for a while.
> Get back about an hour later and everything is normal.
> " Oh hey sis you just get back too? I'll be in my room playing Halo and listening to Nickelback. "
> " I ordered a pizza if you want some. "
> " btw, a kid at my school came out as gay. What a fucking faggot. Seriously why does he think we need to know? "
> " I dunno bro, some people are weird like that. "
I've been sitting on this for about a week and have no idea how to address it. I don't know how my parents would respond. I just want him to stop taking my clothes. He's even taken some of my underwear. ( Some of my nicer underwear at that. I fucking loved those boyshorts. )
How do I handle this delicately /lgbt/? He's my brother. Even if I think it's gross, or weird, or unnatural, I don't want him to be miserable or suffer. I just can't have him stealing my shit constantly.
>>5234764
"Listen here you little shit. If you want clothes, give me some money and I'll buy you some, but if you keep stealing my stuff I'll make your life hell on earth, got it? By the way, that body pillow is fucking creepy."
>>5234791
What's weird about a body pillow? I love mine.
>>5234791
This. Don't be retarded OP.
>>5234764
Missed an opportunity to say "yeah but not as bad as those fucking trannies amirite bro"
Then watch him sweat bullets.
>>5234806
I was guessing it was the kind with some manga girl on it.
>>5234764
Just tell him that you support him and that he should just start hormones already, and if he doesn't he'll never pass as a woman
>>5234791
This is probably the best approach - be practical so it's implied that you understand and don't comment too much on the details or write awkward stuff like "I'll love you no matter what", while also being no-nonsense so he stops taking your stuff.
You could write it in a letter or email or whatever if you don't want to confront him personally, and I expect this would also be less stressful on him.
>>5234764
>Nickleback
You should beat him just for that lie
>>5234764
Tell him that your cool with whatever makes him happy and if he wants you can keep it between the two of you untill hes comfortable to come out to everybody, just tell him it's not cool to take your stuff
>>5234815
I've made off comments since. Not the type to inflame a situation or make him feel bad. Just shit to drop hints.
> " What do you think about Jenner? "
> " Lots of stuff in the news about trannies lately. What is it a fad now for men to pretend to be women? "
> " Would you dress up like a woman for a day for 500$? "
> " You ever wondered what it would be like to be a chick? I was talking with a bunch of girls and we thought it'd be super annoying to have balls. "
ect.
Tell him to stop taking your clothes then ask if he wants to talk about anything. If he's trans then try to be supportive because he'll be much happier if he gets a grip on things while he's young. If he's just into crossdressing then tell him to buy his own clothes
>>5234840
If your cool with it
If your not then obviously dont do that
>>5234841
>it'd be super annoying to have balls
Believe me, it is ...
>>5234834
Never particularly been a fan or listened to them or anything.
Why is that bit particularly egregious?
>>5235306
Just that they're so generic and boring.
>>5235351
Ah, that kind of makes sense. I mean, if you were trying to sound normal, wouldn't you pick a generic/boring thing to associate yourself with?
>>5235398
Either that or he just has shit taste. My money's on the latter desu.
>>5234764
Give him a pack of a dozen panties for XMass, though you might not want to put it under the tree.
>>5234841
You might need to be a bit more blatant. You could even bring this thread up and show him your post. If you do, be prepared to truly help him. Being crossdresser or trans can be quite scary when one is all alone. Of course your brother may have already read your OP post.
BTW, masturbation in cross sex clothing is a reasonably common phase for many transsexuals to go through when on their way to figuring out they are transgender. They usually give it up after figuring things out.
>>5234764
Tranny in denial is homophobic, what's new?
>>5234764
blackmail him
force him to fuck you in return for keeping his secret
OP here, back.
So I decided to do what you guys said and confronted him directly. Waited till after dinner/most everyone had gone to their respective rooms so privacy was ensured.
I feel like things are only more complicated now.
> Went to his room, opened door and walked in.
> He's sitting in front of the mirror dressed up again.
> This time no music playing, and I came all the way in, so he sees me immediately.
> He looks at me horrified.
> Starts with the " I can explain", " You don't understand ", and " this isn't what it looks like" stuff.
> Shut the door.
> Can't lock it, so I move his dresser in front of it.
> Tell him I saw him last week.
> Been thinking about what to do.
> Tell him that I love him, and that while I don't know what he's going through, he can't be stealing my stuff.
> Tell him I won't tell anyone so long as he doesn't steal anymore of my things.
> Ask him to explain what's going on with him.
Cont.
>>5236360
> " I just want to be pretty. "
> wut.jpg
> " I hate being ugly. "
> " I want people to like me. "
> " I want to like me. "
> " I want to be pretty like you. "
> " People would be nicer to me if I were pretty. "
> " It'd be more comfortable. "
> " I hate having nasty rough skin. "
> " I have to shave my face now. It's gross. I hate it. "
> " Have you seen dad? I don't want to be an ape like him. "
> " I want to be soft and pretty. "
> " I want to wear nice clothes and have people care about me. "
> He's crying now. Continues with random shit that doesn't make sense.
> " I have to be ugly when I get married. No one cares. My life is shit. It's all shit. "
> " I want to go to college for music and art but mom and dad would disown me. They wouldn't care if I were a girl. "
> " No one is ever going to say they can't love you because you don't make enough money. "
> " Everyone hates me. I'm hideous, fat, covered in hair. "
> He's not fat, he's a twig. He might not be eating enough. No one hates him, he's an average kid. His hair, even on his face, is still as fine as baby hair.
> " I just want to be like you. "
> He's fucking bawling.
> Hug him, tell him he's not ugly and we all love him.
> Tell him I don't know what to do right now, but I'll think of a way to help him.
> Have him show me what he took. Pick through what I want don't want. Let him keep all the underwear for sure. ( Feels gross taking it back. )
> Tell him to feel better and stop beating himself up.
> Go to my room with my stuff.
> Post this.
Honestly, I don't know what to do. That was so damned weird.
>>5236364
Feels like microwaved pasta. We had a very similar thread some months ago.
Especially the
> " People would be nicer to me if I were pretty. "
sounds so familiar.
>>5236397
Isn't it a common feeling among trans people? I know I've felt that way before.
>>5236364
>>5236360
Damn he's like 200% trans. Try to get help for him, if he can start HRT at like 16 then he'll be able to live a relatively normal and happy life as a girl. Do you think your parents could be supportive? Like, they wouldn't have to be completely in favor of the idea and obviously it'd be a huge shock, but god damn try to do something
>>5236421
Sure it is, but this feels TOO familiar. Then again I might be wrong.
OP, try to get your brother some help. If it's at all possible maybe get him to a therapist. The sooner he (or she) gets help the better.
>>5236432
Honestly I don't know how my parents would react.
Dad is conservative but has a strong libertarian streak. His parenting was pretty laid back and "let them figure out for themselves. " . He took away bedtime, and when we stayed up too late he'd still force us to wake up early and suffer through the day. He'd let us binge on candy or not brush out teeth. ( He advised us not to, and told us why, but then just let us do whatever) When we got cavities and tooth aches, he'd take us to get it fixed at the dentist, but not before letting us suffer with the toothaches for a few weeks to a month first. He's pretty much laid back, believes in letting people do what they do, and feels some amount of suffering and experience are required for growing up. He literally doesn't give a shit about /lgbt/ people.
However, I don't know how he'd react to one of his sons turning out that way.
Mom tries to be everything to everyone. She's catholic when she isn't being liberal. She's conservative until she's talking to stoners or gay people. She's liberal until it comes to politics with dad. ect. She's a wonderful person, she just tries too hard to please everyone. I suspect she'd accept it simply because she wouldn't want her son to hate her.
>>5236481
If I had to guess I think they might be fine at least letting him see a therapist about it. This is definitely an issue that needs to be addressed, so I'd suggest talking to your brother (sister?) and try getting him to warm up to the idea of coming out to his parents and trying to get with a therapist
>>5235038
this, although I think at some point you should talk with him about it too
>>5236397
I thought it was a copypasta of the thread where the girl catches a webcam video of her brother crying and applying makeup when I started reading
>>5236364
This >>5236432
Yeah, he needs help, and to see a gender therapist as soon as possible. The younger he starts, the less physical damage from masculinization. Also he will have a better chance.
It would be great if he can get on anti androgens or puberty blockers as soon as possible. Then with the time that gives he can figure out if he is really a she. From the responses you typed, I'd bet you have a sister...
He needs to see a gender therapist. Not a general therapist, or a religious pray it away type.
>>5236481
Broach some non committal type probes with mom. See how she reacts to trans issues and tv characters. If good, then talk with your brother and see if he is willing to talk to mom now. Explain what transition is. Possibly point him towards Trans Help General here. >>5229163
>>5236524
>Possibly point him towards Trans Help General here
I would advise keeping a thirteen year old away from /lgbt/ desu senpai
>>5236360
>>5236364
Holy crap. Yeah, he sounds trans. The covered in hair, facial hair, man skin, all of that. It's a miserable feeling. A therapist would probably be helpful. He could tell your parents it's for depression, or anxiety if he doesn't want to come out to them right away. As long as he doesn't shut down and start repressing things now, there's a good chance for a successful transition if that's the direction he wants to go.
>>5236534
I handled much worse when I was that old. It's also possible for her to help him with his questions. Best would be to get him into therapy as soon as possible.
>>5236364
>That was so damned weird.
You may want some help too, but also you can go to groups like PFLAG or your school's GSA. There is also learning on one's own. Anne Vitale is a therapist with over 30 years experience, and she has some very good web pages.
http://www.avitale.com/
These are my two favorite for those just new to trans issues. It really is something that won't go away.
http://www.avitale.com/treatmentoptions.htm
http://www.avitale.com/etiologicalreview.htm
>>5236421
I wish. At 13 I was so beaten down I was numb and trying to suppress it all. By then I just wanted to be left alone by everybody. My main outlets were paintings and photography with way to much pain expressed in them.
