Did porn unlock my inner woman?
So like many I fell for trap, sissy, trans porn hqrd. Like past few years its almost all I watch. Gradually however it went from me wanting to plow these girls to wanting to be the girl. And even more so, noticing the clothing, hair, makeup, etc.
It's tovthe point now that when I'm at uni, or the mall or public in general I see girls and am suddenly jealous. Like all I want is to have long hair and knee high boots.
On top of that I've never been good with girls, ever. I'm wondering how I would fair with males and other trap/sissy/trans.
This has been my thought process for 3 or do years now and its killing me. What am I? What do I do? I enjoy being male as far as having a dick, but other than that everything female seems amazing and I get so jealous...
If you're like me, these thoughts will never go away. If you decide to not transition now, you'll consider it again in five years, and in ten, and in fifteen, until you either do it or kill yourself. Seek professional advice.
>>5232091
Fuck. :(
>>5232064
Why do you people need PROOFS about your "identity" so much? Just decide what features you want to have, what appearance you strive for and that's it. No deep thoughts, no doubts. It is like changing style of clothing. Yes it is more complicated and dangerous, but it is, on the other hand, easier that way. You will ALWAYS have doubts with "proofs" approach, and other people will always try to discourage your from doing it pressing this "proofs" button. But having nothing but aesthetic motive will help you enormously with dealing with those faggots and other shit. Try to change the attitude and do something. This whole "proofs" thing is just a vain circle jerkoff.
>>5232091
Or, you just keep choosing not to do it because you don't have to give into every desire that comes up in your mind.
>>5232123
Why think when you can feel?
>>5232064
>inb4 AGP
I can understand where you're coming from OP, but fully transitioning to the opposite sex is impossible and altering your physical features enough to the point where you can pass as the opposite is a very tall order if you don't have the right genetics and age. At best you can hope to look like an androgynous, slightly masculine girl/boy thingy. The worst (and most likely) is an obvious man with tanner 2 tits and the added burden of hoping to save up for expensive and invasive cosmetic procedures to undo or mask what puberty did to your face and body.
The long term effects and risks of modern hormone therapy on transsexuals is poorly researched and ambiguous at this juncture. You will also have to consider SRS/orchidectomy if you want to reduce the long term risks. Obviously that would be a very conflicting issue for you given that you're comfortable with your genitals.
Then there's the social bullshit. People will hate you for existing, your friends and family might disown you or distance themselves from you. Finding a partner will be a thousand times more difficult and you run a very high risk of dying alone. Finding employment will become increasingly difficult.
It might be easier for you however to just take hormones and live as an androgynous man, if you're that uncomfortable with your secondary sex characteristics. But, as I said, long term hormone therapy will have it's consequences.
TL;DR: see a qualified therapist and make sure this is what you really want because being a transsexual is fucking awful and it would be inadvisable to jump into hormones and transition if you don't actually need it.
>>5232140
Is it a joke? Think about what, whether you're enough trans to be given a permission to do something with your life?
>>5232145
You're encouraging a degenerate who watches sissy porn to alter his body to resemble the object of his lust like it's a fashion choice.
>>5232152
Why shouldn't I? Why should this person take your point of view in consideration? Give me at least one reason why this person is not a master of his\her life, but you are?
>>5232160
I think his point is that OP shouldn't go into this blindly when there are very real and permanent risks with transitioning. He has to know and understand the risks and should be honest with himself in order to make a decision that's in his best interests.
Who is this can you help me? Tineye doesnt
>>5232064
I think you should definitely consider talking to a therapist first. Don't go DIY or informed consent just to take the easy route if you aren't sure. And ffs don't ask for advice on 4chan. This board is just about the worst place get advice on anything trans related. Also consider what you would be giving up to transition. Say goodbye to potentially a lot of friends and even family. Say goodbye to your average employment prospects. Say goodbye to dating. Things just get harder from the moment you commit to go fulltime. I can't tell you whether or not you should transition. I think there's the potential that it could do some good for you, but a professional would be able to give you much more reliable assessment than any of us.
>>5232251
https://www.pinterest.com/progeer/wraeththu/
>>5232064
Imagine yourself in the future, 20-30 years from now. You look in the mirror and see a man. How does that idea make you feel? Are you comfortable with that idea?
>>5232141
That's a pretty pessimistic way of looking at things. It's extremely easy to find passable and/or cute trans women. And if OP is "at uni" then they're in a pretty good age to transition. And I mean yes, there are other risks involved, socially and medically. But even though the long-term effects of HRT aren't fully understood and there's known side-effects involved, that doesn't mean you have to immediately think about that. Over a few years is pretty well understood, you can think about getting your balls cut off after you've given estrogen a test drive. And socially... well yeah, shit sucks, but how much it sucks absolutely depends where you live.
I don't disagree with your tl;dr, though. Bottom line, see a therapist, see what options are available. Maybe find an informed consent clinic if you're really sure but the doctor isn't, (there's no easy checklist for determining if someone's trans, ultimately the question is just do you have dysphoria, and that's something a person might need help figuring out, but sometimes people can figure out on their own) but even then, take the informed part very seriously and learn about what HRT will do to you.
People need to be realistic about the costs and risks and benefits of transitioning, but they shouldn't go too far to the other extreme of scaring themselves away. For all the risks, tons of people (most?) who transition are in fact quite happy about it, including many trans lesbians who spent years fapping to trap porn before sorting their own feelings out.
>>5232216
His point is to be an asshole without any reasons but his wish to impose his will on others.
Regarding your point of view: how does it contradict the thing I said previously? Op can both be cautious and make decisions based not on "proofs" but on his\her aesthetic views. Just like girls who do breast augmentation and rhinoplasty, you know.
>>5232133
What the fuck is the point of living if we just ignore long lasting desires? That sounds like one hell of an unfulfilled life, no matter what it is.
>>5232282
Happiness isn't made of pleasure and isn't obtained via desire's satisfaction. The drive is essentially insatiable and once you get a fake happiness for a couple of minutes you'll grow thirstier and more desires will pop in your mind. Suppress drives, construct libido, get happy and free from your own body vicissitudes.
OP here. Thanks for all the responses. Lots to consider going forward.
I think my biggest hang up is losing like 90% of family and friends. :(
>>5232428
Your post is bad and you should feel bad for it.
>>5234530
The fact that you're considering sacrificing your friends and family to fulfill a fetishes you developed from excess viewing of porn says a great deal about you as a person
I guess. I mean I don't like admitting it but I started watching transsexual porn at a young age like 10/11 and started to identify with *some* of the girls I saw in it but I had to mature a bit to really consider transitioning. I always felt like I was gay but I couldn't identify with most gay porn or gay relationships... not cause of homophobia, my mind and body just didn't respond as well. I ended up being a gay guy for a bit but eventually transitioned.
>>5232141
Say what you will but this is textbook AGP and I think there is more to this shit than just OP suddenly discovering their inner femininity.
And yes, I'm AGP too.
>>5232123
>>5234582
True, I think its best to consider what kind of form you want to have... and what is realistic for the form you have that can't be changed. And go from there. Of course always consider the consequences, loss of relationships ect. So many dumb mtfs (usually older ones who are all desperate to do everything fast and just desperate and erratic) jump into things, fail at transitioning (passing), lose all their family and friends and job, kill themselves or live in sadness.
>>5234586
>liking dicks
>homosexual
>agp
this term is meaningless now
>>5232141
facial feminization surgery can be very effective if you aren't at the far end of the masculinity face scale and its very obtainable. I don't like this theme where everyone hear circle jerks about how poor they are and how helpless
>inb4 "boottraps hurr your dumb"
>>5232064
Autogynephilia, Transvestic fetishism.
>>5234632
Tbh its not about how masculine your face is necessarily, but what parts of it are masculine. Manly nose and jaw can be fixed but if you have a long horse face you're fucked.
>>5232428
This is fucking stupid. You get happiness through experiences and highs. Life is about chasing highs rather they be exciting or relaxing. Highs with friends, highs with lovers, highs of experiences/travel. Anything else and you are wasting your life or have no perspective.
>>5234586
Holy shit, just read up on agp
>>5234637
They never even mentioned clothes,
retard.
>>5234643
Yes this is true. That is why I described it as a scale. Some male faces cannot be made to look female. The bone lengthening is a big factor. Males can develop extremely long faces that aren't seen in females. Wide jaws can actually be sexy and make you more attractive and exotic than most cis women but only if they are positioned right, and especially they need to be shallow, going back to your horse face point.
>example, andreja
>>5234644
No, that's just what your life is about anon
>>5234700
Ya maybe. You have to find what makes you high/happy. Duh. There's long term happiness and short term and its always a balance
>>5234644
Those are the words of someone who never felt nor experienced a true, sincere happiness.
>>5234844
We aren't here to be high and happy.
>>5234874
We're here for no reason at all except the meanings we give our own lives. What possible reason could there be for one not to want to be happy and have great experiences? I know those things mean something different to each and every person, but when is it ever untrue that this is what we strive for?
>>5234887
It says a lot about you as a person that you believe we make our own meaning in life, and yet you choose to chase highs as your guiding star.
What makes you believe that happiness and comfort in life in the ultimate pursuit of the human experience?
>>5234908
I didn't even tell you what the highs in my life were. Judgmental much?
(by the way I'm not the person you were originally arguing with)
>>5234926
He isn't talking about your “highs”, he's discussing the mere idea of chasing them. Why would you feel the urge to throw an accusation of judgment to silence the discussion, by the way?
>>5234586
And simply labeling someone as AGP without any other input solves nothing. The toxic hons here just toss it around as a derogatory label in the exact same fashion trolls do with 'mentally ill' and 'degenerate'.
Even if OP has it, it's been argued by proponents of the theory that AGPs should be allowed to transition as long as it makes them happy and they know what they're doing. He should understand what's going on and what he can do for himself.
>>5232064
Do what the fuck makes you happy OP that's all that matters
>>5234934
So what is it you do then? I mean you can tell yourself you're not chasing after highs, but can you truly say that is the truth?
For some people being charitable can be a high, helping out those in need makes them feel better about themselves, etc. All those things people pretend are 'selfless' are usually just to satisfy your own needs first and foremost.
At least I'm honest about my motivations. I do what makes me feel good. If that helps other people, it's a great bonus. I want to be happy and I want others to be happy, sometimes that desire for the bonus goes so far that I make myself miserable in the process of trying to get it, but at least I'm not telling people how they're supposed to find happiness in their life. I get my happiness from lots of places, one of them is experiencing more and more intense sex. how is that a bad thing? I'm being responsible about it. Getting checked regularly, making sure I don't put people into danger of emotional trauma or what have you but somehow this is despicable or pathetic?
That's why I asked why there was a need to be judgmental.
>>5234974
To those who are desireless nothing is missing. You're yearning to fulfill meaningless wishes and painfully ache when you can't achieve it. You grow feebler, utterly looking for higher desires, and those desires beget more desires, and you will be crushed by your drives, for you will desesperately seek further, less reachable ones to realize it meant nothing. Keep covetting these ashes; you'll never be pretty, rich, famous enough. Keep entertaining your mind to not have to bear the sound of silence. Your anguish will haunt you back one day or another.
>>5232064
It surely did for me. I was into men and dicks, didn't like the idea of aging like a man, never watched any porn except out of curiosity like watching fat, old and disabled people fuck while pondering the meaning of life and humanity. Tranny porn, however, made me feel something much different and soon I realized I want to be a sensual dickgirl myself.
>>5234993
Sure thing ... suuuure thing ...
>>5235014
How far have you gone with the transition?
>>5234993
>Keep entertaining your mind to not have to bear the sound of silence.
I rather like that by the way. From time to time.
>>5235068
I don't want you to dive in asceticism, don't worry!
>>5235033
Bout 8 months in.
>>5232064
See a therapist, work out if
>you want to be a woman in every day contexts for non-sexual reasons
>if the time, money and stress involved with transitioning is worth it
>>5235085
But you DO want me to do something?
>>5235088
Dang, all because you are willing yourself to become a real life dick girl? That's a big commitment honestly
>>5235113
Having no facial hair at all is a huge plus, so is not smelling like a gross caveman. So yah, would do it again/5
>>5235094
Of course, I want you to be happy!
>>5235170
I've thought about it myself, but I didn't think I should make a decision based on porn
>>5235192
I want you to do the same then <3
>>5235245
Doing…?
>>5235249
Being happy and stuff obviously.
>>5235014
How "manly" were you/are you? I'm tall and broad :(
>>5235288
It's great.
>>5235357
I know.
>>5235014
Ayy sounds a lot like me. Mostly into men, was always p fem. Found futa/trap early on and decided I didn't want to be a age into a gross caveman so I decided to give transition a try.
Hetero, reporting in. This is why pornography is bad for you and why you should stop viewing such filthy because it will harm your sexual life, give it unrealistic views, make it perverse, and overall make you more damaged of a person.
Stop viewing jew smut and maybe you will not be a sick fag tranny.
>>5235566
Stopped watching porn years ago but still turned out to be a pervert.
>>5232140
Feeling and thinking work hand in hand.
Shit works best when both sides are respected as equals.
Like space and time, they're totally dependent on each other to even have function and purpose.
>>5235594
IMHO
We are all permanently damaged the second you orgasm and have that chemical reaction to porn filth. Hurt my marriage.
>>5235614
Idk, I was already into pain when I was 5 years old and that was way before I watched any porn.
>>5235566
lol nofap. porn doesn't make you gay. but its easier to believe you have a disease than to face reality. closet cases are worse than fatasses who think they have some hormonal disorder.
>>5235614
>blaming your utter lack of self control and your failures as a partner on porn instead of yourself
>>5235566
This.
I stopped masturbating a month ago and my social life has improved considerably.
Is it wrong to make your fantasies realties seems to be the question
>>5235566
What about those of us who have never masturbated to pornography but still ended up trans?
Porn probably doesn't make you trans. I mean, we don't know what exactly makes people trans, but it doesn't make much sense to blame pornography. Lots of people masturbate to dickgirl porn without getting trans feels.
What seems to happen a lot is that dysphoria can be something that gradually creeps up on you. It's hard to know you're in the "wrong" body if you've never been in the "right" body. Before they realize they're trans, a lot of trans women just go through life feeling kind of detached from their bodies but not realizing that's not normal. Maybe thinking it would be good to "become a girl" but not thinking that their feelings are particularly unique. But then as the possibility of that being a real option starts to be realized, shit gets serious.
