>lol, anon has to roleplay as a pregnant woman and talk about morning sickness for this assignment!
>OMG, this is going to be so fucking awkward. Anon reading a woman's part! I can't stop laughing!
>before halloween
>drinking with friends
>holy shit, remember last year there was that really tall dude dressed up like a woman? No, dude, you missed it, just picture anon dressed up as a woman, but even worse! It was literally that fucking bad! Ha, I can't even imagine anon dressed up like that. He'd look terrible! Don't ever grow your hair out, anon.
>sorry about the team name, anon. it doesn't sound to feminine does it.
>me: actually it doesn't really matter. i'm cool with it.
>really? okay, i just didn't want it to be too weird for you.
>tfw I've been on hormones for a while, and I'm never going to come out to anyone, ever
>tfw christmas break will be a good time to check out. it's so close.
Fuck this. It doesn't get better.
How is everyone else planning to off themselves? I need ideas. Pros, cons, etc...
>>5324401
My plan when I intended to off myself earlier was during winter where there's snow everywhere, then to take a train to bumfuck nowhere, hop off in a place where there's almost just nature, walk in a direction where's there's no civilization for half a day, find a pretty place, stuff my mouth with pills and alcohol and proceed to pass out and freeze to death.
My dead body would probably be never found, and people wouldn't have to think of me as dead, as I'd just disappear so I could easily fake a note of needing to get away from my current life and live differently elsewhere, and stating I worked hard on not being able to be tracked down, so even if they tried they couldn't.
It's still my plan if I really end up deciding to end my life.
I'm just gonna get addicted to heroin when the time comes because I'm too much of a pussy to make any concrete plans. I won't be able to escape addiction because by the point I'm ready to commit suicide I won't have anything to fight for to pull me out of it so it will just destroy me.
Plus I really wanna try heroin before I die.
>>5324527
Just to clarify the methadone was a pill. Won't try actual heroin 'cause I hate needles.
>>5324527
>and it was pretty blissful, which is the same reason why I haven't done it since
Yeah I'm trying to hold off touching opiates until I'm ready to give up, I've read enough shit online to know that there's not really any going back once you get deep into them (unless you have something to live for). Well I did take tramadol once but it just made me feel sick as fuck with a weak calm, peaceful feeling in the background.
>>5324401
Going to save up 500 bucks so I can get my PAL.
Then I'm going to take the train to Canadian tire, buy a double barrel and some slugs, then blow my head off in the alley behind the store.
Played this out in my head pretty much every day for the last year.
Don't do it anons!
>>5324621
Its too late for me.
>>5324621
I'll most likely chicken out.
Even as a jaded tranny this thread makes me sad.
If there's an afterlife I hope you guys get it easy next time around.
It gets better
>>5324401
Coming out to your friends is like pulling off a band-aid. The more you drag it out, the worse it is.
I seriously fail to see how a single thing you listed is anything more than eyerolling or a minor annoyance.
>>5325055
shut up shitlord, it's 2015
>>5325055
The fact that I'm a tranny and everyone I know thinks I'd fail so miserably at being a woman, that it's hilarious to them, and they never bring up one positive factor. Not that they need to, but it just makes it seem like I"m pretty fucking hopeless.
>>5325147
I'm not mad at them, and I don't think they need to be pc or any sjw crap. Just upset that it confirms my thoughts of transition being hopeless.
>>5325204
It doesn't sound like they even KNOW you're transgender. They may just think you're an effeminate cis male. Try not to let the hormones get you all emotional, sister.
Instead of offing yourself, spend your money on something useful to you. I mean, at worst if you're going to off yourself who cares about a little holiday fun, right?
Call some salon/spa places.
Some of them have a mini makeup studio.
Buy a makeup lesson.
Get yo' sissy on.
This is a sad thread.
>>5325251
>It doesn't sound like they even KNOW you're transgender.
OP, I have to agree with this anon.
Also, sounds less like a fail tranny and more like fail friends. You can have good, supportive, and caring friends without them being part of the PC/SJW crowd
>>5325727
I'm not sure though how them knowing I'm trans would make a difference, other than them trying not to hurt my feelings. Isn't it good that I got their unfiltered opinion that I'd be a terrible, and ugly girl?
>>5326378
Are you really gonna end it?
Go to the top of a tall building, stand on the edge and get ready to jump just as a bunch of kids on a school field trip come out behind you. Stare at them for a few seconds, die of embarrassment, realise how stupid you're being and go eat chocolate.
>>5327320
Are you me?
>>5324401
I put a gun in my mouth and pulled the trigger, it didn't go off and I decided to transition. That was Jan 21st this year and I told myself if I wasn't living as a girl by then I would try again, this time with a new bullet and make sure its a +P round.
Being trans is hell, only if we could form lepper colonies maybe our dysphoria would not be so bad, who am I kidding, the least ugly would still make me dysphoric.
Slightly off topic but reading ops post made me think back to my drama days. A few of my teachers made me always do a female role. I guess they knew before me
Also don't kill yourself op. I'm sure there's many like you who've had the same feelings but fuck everyone else and do it for you. Learn to make-up like a pro then no matter how ugly you are you can still look good. Biological women do that so why not us?
>>5324401
If it's the end, then you have nothing to lose any more.
Do you realise what that means? YOU HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE, FAGGOT.
Do whatever the fuck you want. Try stuff. It will be 1000% better than the everlasting blackness of death. You can always do that if you want, why not give it another day?
Anyway, how long is a 'while' on hormones?
>>5327469
Yes, I am you. *weird 70s sci-fi music*
>>5324401
I'm waiting to go through therapy and possibly to try and transition before I walk into the void, but my plan is to write "Long Live the Queen" with a sharpie on my bathroom wall and then slit my wrists in the bathtub. Fuck any suicide note that's more than a sentence.
desu that's just how people are when they assume you want to be like most men and be masculine. it's a social thing. people act like that because they want to affirm the ideas about you they have in terms of gender and their own ideas they have about gender. emasculation makes them uncomfortable or is seen as being something to protect others from, so they do that sort of stuff to keep people they think of as guys from suffering emasculation. it really isn't about you as a person, and if you reject that shot and make change to be yourself and tell other people you don't like their ideas about you, they'll start to get it. don't take that sort of stuff people are saying at face value
>>5327505
Kayla, I know I've given you some shit about your personality etc, but despite appearances, I don't actually hate you. It sounds to me like you have mental issues separate to dysphoria, something along the lines of depression/bi-polar. For your own sake (and everyone else's) get some professional help.
>>5327901
First and foremost she needs to get away from her mom.
>>5328304
I dunno man I'm just starting to feel a little bad for her. Maybe she's just desperate to fit in.
>decide to gauge my best friends opinion on trans stuff before I decide to come out by saying I know a trans person
>alone with him just talking, known this dude since primary school, trans stuff has never come up
>mention I have a trans friend
>he fucking wigs out, starts asking why I know this person, am I fucking gay or something, this person should be chased outta town
>holy shit he ain't joking
Well lucky I tested the waters.
>>5324401
Not even close to suicidal, but if I were to do it I would do it sky diving. If I survive the impact some how I was meant to live.
>>5328678
have you ever thought that he reacted that way because he thinks that is how you would want him to react? People change their opinions about shit quickly when people they respect have a differing opinion on it.
another anon said it in here, but ill say it again. If you are truly are at the lowest low and want to end it all, why not just come out? seriously the only person stopping you, is you.
I was in a similar position before i came out. I attempted suicide and failed. After the fact i realized that trying to end it without even coming out was a stupid idea. i thought, "why not commit to it and see how it turns out...if it all goes wrong and only brings more pain then i can always run back to suicide." I came out, and although it was rough getting started. There were people that stuck with me and gave support. There were also those who abandoned me, but fuck those cunts. The people that stick by you are the ones that matter.
seriously OP please come out, see how it goes at least, dont kill yourself, you may end up missing out on actually finding happiness.
>>5328783
Best case scenario it proves that his friend has weak character and is the sort that would euthanize trans people because the church tells him to. Worst case scenario, he does all that, but it also gives him a warm fuzzy feeling.
if I were to kill myself I would probably die around stray dogs so they could sustain themselves on my corpse.
>>5329242
Jesus christ
>>5329428
what? I have way more empathy for animals than most human beings
It's not like I plan to anyway.
Couldn't you just move to another country and get a totally fresh start, leaving everyone in your past behind? I know it couldn't be easy, but you all have something to live for and if you really think you've got nothing to lose, it must be worth a shot, right?
>>5324401
If you really are going to, how'd you like for someone to be there at the end, hold you as you go? Let's exchange throwaways.
I'll tell you you're beautiful, right as you slip away.
>>5324401
>>lol, anon has to roleplay as a pregnant woman and talk about morning sickness for this assignment!
That would have destroyed me back in my school days desu. The fact that I'll never truly be a mother is my greatest grief in life. I'm kinda ok with it now and adoption doesn't seem like "settling" anymore, but I'm still sad about it from time to time. :/
>>5326610
Not now. I'll probably chicken out, but during Christmas break would be less disruptive of other people's lives. It will be more likely if I don't get a job to keep me distracted.
>>5327585
I see your point, but it's literally like a ton of bricks and I just don't have the energy.
>how long is a while
A pathetically long time, I started blockers at 22, and estrogen at 23. Back then I had a lot more enthusiasm.
>>5327756
I'd like to believe your explanation. Just not sure how to make the distinction between whether they're meaning that, or my explanation.
Cute dog too. Do cute and happy things ever make you feel depressed and cry just because of how disconnected you are from cute and happy? Fuck, I sound emo, it's not intentional though, I swear.
