last thread >>6482810
tinychat com/notgaygen
https://www.cdc.gov/lgbthealth/index.htm
Have you gotten tested yet, gaygen?
So I've got fucking Kallmann's Syndrome so I'm pretty much a 6" tall pre-pubescent 19 year old. The fucking doctor said they won't be able to put me on testosterone for months. I go back to college before then. Fucking god dammit. How am I supposed to get men besides 40 year old pedos like this?
>Be 32, closet, landwhale fatass
>Decide to make a change and start slow-carb diet
>hard, but lost 10lb in 2 weeks
>Wish to go from ham planet to below-bear size in the next 6 months
>Go to either Magfest, Boston Anime or some other con
>Dress trench coat and soldier stuff, hit the rave
>Meet a cute boy, ask to dance
>If things go well, ask if he wants to party at his place
>Get back there and blow him for 4 hour strait while I listen to techno
Should I follow my dreams?
>>6488720
I stay safe by being a kissless virgin.
>>6488771
That sounds my kind of shit.
Go for it. Although I'm very tempted to have you around me. I'm a sucker for masks and trenchcoats, anon.
...yes, that was a flirt towards you.
>>6488790
That's very kind of ya. I will keep working on it then. Good to hear masked trenchcoatman can be attractive to others.
>>6488801
Hey, I am the one who has the pleasure of talking with someone with such tastes. Keep working on it, I am confident you'll find a cutie. I have half of an outfit like that, I just need a decent trenchcoat.
If you ever feel like getting some tips, hit me up on Skype. It's the same name as my trip, just altogether and on low caps. Or you can summon me here. Anyhow, best of luck to you. Go get those cuties, bro.
>>6488803
it really is
there's a difference between being a twinks and actually being prepubescent though
My voice and face are like that of a 12 year old
Also pretty much can't be sexually active until I start treatment
>>6488833
post vocaroo
>>6488822
Go to any army-navy surplus for, they sell them buy the dozen. If you want something "fancy", I got no idea.
>>6488833
How do you even know you are gay if you haven't hit puberty?
>>6488916
I live in Brazil, they'd rip me out. But I know how to get a cool one, don't worry.
Post pics when you get your outfit.
Always use a condom faggots. Trust no one.
I had a slutty bottom tell me he was poz. He found out a month after I fucked him. I was p scared, but fortunately I use condoms and tested neg.
>>6488944
Or you can choose not to be homosexual instead.
>>6488961
Now you're memeing with memes. Nice, dude.
>>6488974
>implying homosexuality isn't a choice
>>6488771
Thats a good dream.
>>6488823
kek you rekt yourself
>>6488944
What's wrong with not having sex with strangers?
>>6488764
6 inches tall? Bro, my dick is bigger than you. Do you even grow?
>>6489319
>>6489164
having sex with friends can be messy
>use to come on gaygen a year ago
>thought id never find a bf
>found myself a real man 3 months ago
>>6489431
Well, congratulations on the prospect of being crushed to death if he slips and falls fucking you upright.
>>6488823
why would you shit post on /lesgen/ anyway?
>>6489683
He's right, anon
>>6489683
-shrug- I guess I'm a newfag. I lost my old set of trips last year when my SSD suddenly ate shit. Currently waiting on the brute force to get the keys to the "castle" back.
Who the fuck are you?
Oh wait, nobody asks because you're a faggot that doesn't have enough style to use a Tripcode generator.
Sad day when the bisexual is out-stylin' a real live faggot.
That's who I am.
>>6489743
Unrelated: The new batman. I just......oh wow.
>>6489756
I dont know if I want it or if I want to be it
>>6489762
No plans to stick around really. I show up every few months to throw my wits about, usually after I've grown tired of drowning my sorrows in video games, pot, and dank memes.
>>6489807
oh ok :(
>>6489888
i believe n u
I must have the AIDS man, I'm fucking dying, everything hurts, dirty shits, utterly delirious. Lemsip isn't even helping. Game over man.
bf is asleep and i'm up pretty late tonight
was wondering if gaygen could be my friend tonight while i watch 0079 and get comfy.
>>6489959
>Love ain't free.
i don't understand. ;~; i'm a poorfag.
>>6489959
Did you have a virus or something? That's what it seems to be, I'm completely fucked. No cough though.
Also, its only you that makes it poopy clowny, you have to start exposing yourself again. I told, 4:17 AM, run outside, you don't need to go far, just to the road and back.
>>6489981
Colds are all viruses. And yeah, I know everything is terrible because Im a piece of crap. But when you're a useless idiot just wanting to not be useless isn't really enough for it to happen, you're too useless to stop being useless.
>>6489973
Quid pro quo. We do something for you, you do something for us. I ain't keeping no one company unless I see them ducats.
>>6490025
>ducats
i'm a poorfag though. i don't have ducats to spare.
i thought gays were liberal. show me some social welfare, friend-o.
>>6490025
I wouldn't say you're useless or an idiot to be fair, its just a mindset you've got stuck in for years and it took over you. I don't know how you could improve it other than just getting out there and talking to someone, trouble is that's the hardest part of it all. You converse just fine on here, so maybe just get chatting to people who share interests on here, at least that is some form of social interaction.
I also think you should sneak out at 4:17AM.
>>6490072
Nah. Think I'll just go ahead and do nothing forever.
>>6490084
Well that's just silly. You're silly. Silly silly silly. Doughnut.
>>6490084
sounds like my cup of tea
>all of your favorite songs you've been listening to for years
>dreaming of the day you'd listen to them with your boyfriend
>going on summer road trips with him, with beachy guitars on the radio
>tfw waiting for bf
>tfw bf never comes
>tfw all of your favorite songs are becoming boring and empty
>they've lost their excitement and appeal
>tfw bf will never ignite your life with passion and joy
>>6490108
Naw, just silly. Silly is kinda like stupid but less so.
>>6490114
>all your favorite songs you listened to with your boyfriend
>dreaming of when they didn't hurt to listen to
>sitting behind him watching him study, listening to them on the way to parties, showing them to him on his low dark times and seeing them make him happy and his feelings easier on him
>tfw waiting for him for months
>tfw he finally lets me know he dumped me
>tfw he's gone, gone for good
>tfw months later more and you still wish the songs were, too
i don't know why i typed that
wow, sobbing now
>>6490143
>being able to get a boyfriend
>complaining
Don't even try to steal my thunder.
>My best friend has never been a "having boyfriend" kind of guy
>Since I broke up with my boyfriend, we hang out more, I start to notice something, but don't think much about it
>One night out drinking, he confess he likes me, a lot
>That he likes listen to my stories, even if they're boring and I repeat them, he just loves listening to me
>He says that if he had to marry someone ever, he would marry me
>But he is superficial and that can't have a relationship
>Says that he always have liked me
>We already had talked before about him staying in my couch that night
>We go back home but we both stay in my bed
>We fall asleep and wake up hugging
>He says he's very sad I'm moving abroad after this summer. That he's gonna miss me a lot
>We kiss and caress each other all night
>I had to go to my intership next morning for a few hours, leaving him there
>I expected that he would'd go before I return
>I return and he's still there
>We repeat again, but this time we're not durnk so we don't have an excuse
>He leaves eventually
Next day
>I text him "Should we talk?"
>He says "lol, about what?
>Ask him if we are going back to normal
>"Of course? I already said that I don't want a relationship or anything more"
>>6490159
Sounds to me like he needs to date around/ fuck around a lot more before he decides to settle down with you. There comes a point in everyone's life where they long for complacency and the loving touch of someone important to them. If you like him just wait till he's ready to settle down, if you don't then who cares.
>>6488770
Hey someone mentioned me
>>6490281
>>6490281
>>6490292
>>6490298
Oh no, someone actually posted in this dead ass fucking thread
Be happy it's not maki, shitdick
>>6490306
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4N_l1w6KUxE
>have a fuck buddy who I let do me every weekend
>last time I had sex with him was just over a month ago
>he calls to tell me he got tested and positive for HIV
>we haven't been using condoms since the start of the year
Be honest how fucked am I. If he's positive and blew his load inside of me a few times what are the chances I have it. I'm super scared right now. What happens if I do get it? Help
>>6488771
This all sounds great and being as I go to those events, I could be the lucky fellow. I suggest you get on /fit/ and read the sticky then ask /cgl/ to pick you a better cosplay.
If you want to cosplay, cosplay, if you want to meet guys cosplay what guys want to see or what people can engage with.
Best of luck familia.
>>6490343
Depends if he had it when it was fucking you I guess. Just go get yourself checked out, I think there's an incubation period for it to be detected though, so you may have to wait on it a bit.
>>6489720
Absolutely fucking kek.
This fagfag using an identifying mark on an anonymous Vietnamese timeshare exchange forum. You uncultured autist.
Happy Canada Day
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UiPdsIDp1GE
>>6490404
>>6490114
i feel like i have pretty much just given up hope and have just devoted my life to being distracted enough with my hobbies until i'm happy
>tfw can't decide between two men
Is there anything mor disgusting than guys who call their bf "daddy?
>>6490416
> can't decide if i want to date a man or woman
>>6490424
how hard can it be
>>6490416
>>6490424
tfw attracted to two guys who are different but both wonderful in their own ways and can't decide but ultimately it doesn't matter because they're both straight
Happy Canada Day.
How are you deviant lil bros?
>>6490416
just keep them a secret from each other for as long as possible
i watch a lot of disney and it will totally work out for you :)
>>6490343
its like a 1 in 70 chance you'd contract it from a single encounter as a bottom
substantially lower odds from a single encounter as a top. odds in generally are probably much lower than you think that you have it
get tested, HIV is pretty managable, use condoms from now on
(69/70)^26 (once each weekend) is like 68ish. thats the chance you dont have it. i think.
>>6490423
What's the matter daddy? Don't you like when we hold hands daddy? Are you gonna punish me daddy?
>>6490440
Eeeewwwwww
>>6490439
In literally every film ever about lying/secrets there's always a lie reveal scene
>>6490437
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q7Zn6ERmZXM
>>6490443
and it brings you closer to your soulmate....... the right choice...
>>6490423
Lots of things.
Politics, the floor under the fridge, scat, Facebook, the meat industry, freemium games, earwigs, organized religion, Donald Trump's face, PETA, beer, people who circumcise their kids, the porn industry, early US history, doritos, and that slimy feeling in the back of your throat after you swallow cum.
what is it supposed to mean when people send you this emoji as an opening message?
>>6490481
Probably that they can't think of an icebreaker, but disapprove of "woof!" or "hey, what's up?"
>>6490490
but people keep using it as it has some kind of specific meaning, and when I'm asking they just stop replying. It's happen with three different people now.
>>6490481
Reminds me of gay Mario.
>tfw have fwb situation with room mate
>tfw he admits he wants to be more than fuck buddies
Why can't we just go on being gaming buddies / house mates / two guys that touch each others dicks? I don't want a boyfriend
>>6490449
>>6490575
because that's the perfect relationship.who would you rather have with you for the rest of your life a guy who knew you from the start as your buddy house mate etc. or someone who you went on a date with and only had romantic feelings for and not a friendship first. Most people who go on a date are persuaded in liking someone based on looks and sexual attraction. They never really bothered to see if they can be your friend first when both of you are not in a sexual mood. I see this constantly in couples I meet or just see. They have nothing in common and they treat each other like boyfriend or girlfriend instead of a best friend who just so happens to be your partner as well. I see it most commonly in old couples. They can't stand each other they can't even stand being around each other. So when they retire they go golfing, woodshop work, etc. just to get away from the person they fell in love with. If they had a strong friendship before they got into a relationship they would be doing things together instead of finding every way to get away from each other.
>>6490591
And this is why I crush on straight guys. Surely one of them will be as desperate as I am.
>>6490590
What are you and your bearfriend going to do to celebrate Canada Day today?
>>6490599
>surely
What kind of shops would sell douches?
i dont wanna go to a gross sex shop unless I have to...
>>6490627
walmart
>>6490627
most big grocery stores and pharmacies
>>6490591
It's a double edge sword though. Sometimes escalating friendship is detrimental to the whole affair, but you don't realize it till it's too late that all you wanted a close friend, and couldn't be a good partner.
>>6490627
walmart, any pharmacy
>>6490634
Plus Walmart has self check out if you don't wanna be embarrassed
>>6490591
That's well and good and stuff but I have studies to do and a job to work, I was completely happy just having someone that I got along with that shared rent with me and who satisfied my sexual needs, I don't have time for a relationship right now
>>6490639
>over thinking
>for 100 Alec
>>6490649
People who think like this over think relationships and life in general. Maybe at age 20 or so you're not ready for anything and just want to have sex with people without strings attached, but there comes a point in everyone's lives when you realize you are going to get old and unattractive to people. The fear of being alone the rest of your life scares most people into finding someone (anyone) to be with and they end up settling down with someone they really don't care for emotionally, but physically for a number of years that is. Once sexual attraction fades they have nothing left in their partners that they decided to spend the rest of their lives with and they're stuck in a rut. Hence why many men get a mid-life crisis. They're unhappy at their choice of partner or just all round choices in life they chose. If they were smart about it from the start they would have tried a meaningful relationship with a friend first whether with the same gender or not. Over thinking love vs. friendship is a common mistake everyone seems to be stuck with time and again. Life is quite short people, don't waste it away on worrying.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EsL_TAfQxH8&feature=youtu.be
I never thought I could hate Canadians any more than I already did but this has made me reach a whole new level. I am so fucking sick of those smug snowniggers thinking they are better than everyone. Canada has literally achieved nothing of note ever since our lads went over there and rekt the native snowniggers.
If you're Canadian, congratulations on being less important to the globe than New Zealand.
Sincerely,
the Fatherland.
>>6490672
Thanks bb. <3
>>6490660
Less over thinking and more my relationship.
I want that connection again, but it's a lot more difficult.
I regret every single moment for fucking up
>>6490600
Having dinner with his folks and siblings. What are you doing mr.canadian at heart?
>>6490640
>>6490638
I went to my local pharmacy and there was a young lady behind the counter who didn't know what a douche was and had to talk to her manager
and then when she came back she looked at me funny and said "we don't sell that kind of thing here"
my cheeks are still red from embarassment
:(
>>6490676
omg omg omg omg veny haii
you're the only canadian i like which makes you an honorary brit/american <3<3<3
how r u ive missed u so much :c
>>6490687
If a Christian wants you to feel ashamed, why would you obey?
>>6490694
How do you know she was a Christian and why would you come to the conclusion that someone has to be Christian and pretends to not know what a douche is to make that person feel ashamed?
Grow the fuck up.
>>6490687
So where do people go when they need to douche before medical procedures where you live?
Is my asshole weird?
It has this pinkish area around it, I'm worried it might not be normal.
>>6490700
Because every person I've met that plays ignorant when it comes to ordinary hygiene products that their store definitely carries and gives anyone the stink eye is a Christian? Was the grocery bagger lady in this story brown? No? You grow up, stop trying to convince me that I'll feel like a cool kid if I suck on /pol/ dick cheese.
>>6490703
That is a sign of early onset death dying disease, symptoms may progress to death if you don't immediately have it surgically removed, seek help.
>>6490706
Yeah, right. Being from 4chan, you would have mentioned that in your first post about the story. You're just doing damage control.
>>6490672
This vid makes me chuckle quite a bit.
>>6490720
Made up stories tacked on as damage control don't blow anyone the fuck out except retarded autismos like you.
>>6490688
Hai bb.
Im good, living the good life, loving a good man, and still lifting.
How are you, did you finally manage to get a "nekoboifriend"?
I'm guessing you managed to hit 3 plate bench, 5 plate squat and 6 plate deads
>>6490729
It's not true, that's why I pointed out it's a lie.
>>6490687
why did u need to ask for help
they're almost always either with feminine hygiene products or very rarely near adult diapers (on the rare chance those products arent already near each other).
>>6490732
>believe the bits that suit you
>ignore the bits that dont
what?
>>6490733
dude how is this an unbelievable story
the lady behind the desk at the pharmacy was wearing a hijab or headscarf or something. I live in London, this is not unusual.
>>6490736
I couldnt find them, and she asked if i was looking for anything after i spent a few minutes dithering around
>>6490730
kek no, I've been doing physio for the last 9 months or so because all my joints are fucked. But I'm sick of not lifting so I'm starting lifting again whether my joints are fine or not.
>How are you, did you finally manage to get a "nekoboifriend"?
Yeah, been dating Swede for a few months now.
Moving to the US in a month too, gonna bulk up on shitty American food and hit 115kg by December hopefully. The growth hormones in the milk should do the trick.
>>6490742
It's an unbelievable story because you didn't address the fact that what the woman did was wrong. That indicates that you have no sense of morality, and thus you're the sort of person that can't be trusted to ever tell the truth.
>>6490742
Just go to Ann Summers or something man, they have all that gear in there.
>>6490754
It's an unbelievable story because no woman with blue eyes and light hair wears a hijab UNLESS the anon is from Germany or Sweden.
>>6490758
I quit believing anon's story long before that point. I quit believing it about 3 words into his post, the first 3 words I read as I skimmed his post, "douche" and "me ashamed."
>>6490762
I didn't read the entire story because I'm cool lol :D
>>6490754
she didnt do anything except tell me they didnt have "that kind of thing here".
although i felt like she "looked at me funny", that isnt something i can complain about, and in fact she stayed relatively professional throughout. wheres the immorality?
>>6490758
i dont think islam or hinduism is like being jewish - its quite easy to convert i think
>>6490757
isnt that just for girls?
are you 100% sure im not going to make an idiot of myself?
>>6490743
Never really interacted with swede so dont know much about him. Hope he treats you well bb. And wears those cat ears for you.
Why the move to the usa though?
>>6490681
Prolly just set of fireworks after work. 11am- 8pm. I hate fridays. Then have some poutine and pierogies for supper. SP never experienced the joys of American fireworks; most fireworks are banned because they're labeled as dangerous. We got some kiddy stuff like snakes, parachutes, and flower spinners. Also, we found some funny chicken fireworks that have a balloon in it's butt area. Should be a good laugh.
>>6490764
I'm not obligated to read boring and predictable made up stories that have an ulterior motive. It's not about being cool. Ordinary people skip over boring, predictable, evil lies.
>>6490765
Target demographic is obviously women but I used to go in there all the time to buy toys for myself and lube and what not. The staff are there to do a job, they don't give a fuck man, who cares what they think. Most of the time the girls get more embarrassed because a man is asking them what one they recommend.
You have to be over 18 to go downstairs where they keep the toys and stuff though.
>>6490765
>that isnt something i can complain about
You can. I just did, and I wasn't even there, and the story never even really happened. I can complain about all sorts of things that don't even happen if I want. And the immorality of the imaginary lady's actions is that she would have had to have lied about there not being douches in a pharmacy, and that's not professional, and she neglected to sell you one, which is not only illegal anywhere in the world, but could only be motivated by false religions. Only religion could make someone endanger their own job and give you the stink eye over something that's perfectly ok.
>>6490766
>Why the move to the usa though?
Why wouldn't you want to move to the greatest nation on earth?
>>6490781
>>6490781
Its the joints in my legs which are the problem so I'm just gonna stick to leg press instead of squatting. Hopefully I can find a gym with a trap bar for deadlifts cos barbell DL is a bitch for me now.
>>6490766
Going on an exchange for a semester.
>And wears those cat ears for you.
yeah cos he fuckin "stole" them reeeeeeeeee
>>6490794
LOOKATHOWCUTEHEIS
reminds me a bit of senpai <3
>>6490784
Pick me up some lube please. Any kind.
>>6490786
>illegal anywhere in the world
How's that? Where do you live that a business can't refuse service?
>>6490798
Ok, I'm guessing you've never been in a pharmacy in your life, or outside once in your life, so I'll spell it out for you; every pharmacy on earth sells douches. Even pharmacies in Africa. Even pharmacies in North Korea. Every pharmacy. 100% of all pharmacies. If you knew what a pharmacy was, you'd know that. Maybe read up on what the word "pharmacy" means before making up a story about one?
>>6490798
no it's annskellington
>>6490808
this one didnt, so you must be wrong
it seemed more like a prescription pill focussed place
>>6490812
You're not listening. Do you know what 100% means?
If you're story conflicts with what's possible in reality 100%, it's not very believable. Do you understand what that means?
>>6490812
>it seemed more like a prescription pill focussed place
sooooo a pharmacy?
>>6490794
I'd recognize that ceiling fan anywhere.
>>6490828
You can't have an experience that conflicts with reality. That's not how experiences work. Or reality for that matter.
>>6490832
how is this difficult for you to understand? this is so surreal, holy shit
1. I went to a pharmacy which had no douches
2. You say that all pharmacies have douches
It is obvious one of these two items is false. Since I know that 1. is true, and also since 2. is an unevidenced opinion, I can safely conclude that you are wrong and possibly mentally challenged.
QED.
>>6490842
>douche is a feminine hygiene product
>anywhere that sells vast amounts of feminine hygiene products will sell douches most likely
>pharmacies usually sell vast amounts of feminine hygiene products
>therefore most pharmacies sell douches
>>6490687
Are you British by any chance? Douches are considerably less common in the UK than in America because British women do not tend to douche (douching the vagina is bad for women). Boots and Superdrug don't sell douches, for example.
So a lot of American anal sex advice recommends going into a supermarket or pharmacy and asking for a douche, leading to countless baby gays embarrassing themselves around the country.
Your best bet is to order one online or to go to a sex shop.
>>6490842
You can't prove reality false by saying you know it's false. And I don't need to provide evidence that the sky is blue. 1 billion people could read my post and 1 billion people would know that I'm right. 100% of all pharmacies carry douches.
>>6490869
You are wrong, which makes your repeated insistences that you are somehow inherently right more baffling and embarassing
>>6490845
Good point. At least we get to be great until November.
>>6490853
Douches are not just feminine hygiene products. They're also sometimes necessary for certain medical conditions, extremely common medical conditions, such as yeast infections. Hence why 100% of all pharmacies in the world carry douches.
>>6490874
http://m.boots.com/h5/index?unCountry=uk
just searched the website of Boots, the largest pharmacy chain in the uk, and they dont do douches
stop posting dude
>>6490871
Dude, go outside. Do you even realize that your memes don't work? Have you ever realized that even one of your memes has failed? Have you just been convincing yourself that 100% of all your memes always succeed? Go outside. Experience reality.
>>6490869
The evidence is pretty easy.
1. Use a proxy or VPN to set your location to the UK
2. Go to superdrug.com and boots.com (the two biggest pharmacy companies in the UK, kinda like walgreens
3. Try and find douches anywhere on that website.
You won't be able to, as they don't sell douches. British women don't douche.
when you've never had a boyfriend
or a relationship
or sex
or friends
and want to just die in your sleep at 26
>>6490878
>http://m.boots.com/h5/index?unCountry=uk
And a scam website matters to me how, exactly?
>>6490884
ahh, the classic "i was trolling the whole time" tactic
lmaoing @ ur life rn senpai
>>6490874
>They're also sometimes necessary for certain medical conditions, extremely common medical conditions, such as yeast infections
You don't need to douche to treat a yeast infection, you can use a cream or a pessary or just take an antifungal pill. Douching is like the 1940s way of dealing with a yeast infection, and can wash bacteria into the uterus and fallopian tubes so it's really bad for women to do.
>>6490886
What do those words you just typed have to do with anything?
I just went to the real boots site (not the one supplied in this thread) and what do you know? What do you think I found? What do you think I found in the UK? Was it douches? Come on, ask me, was it douches?
>>6490845
>2 choices
>forgetting bernie
>>6490896
was it?
>>6490896
Could you please tell us what boots website you think is the real one? You're probably on their American site. Americans use douches so if there's some American branches of Boots they'll sell them.
>>6490896
Jesus Christ shut up.
>>6490926
I don't obey heterosexual living dog shit.
>>6490928
Well boots.com is the official website, but if you're in America the tracking cookies will send you to the American website so you'll see the American product selection.
British women don't douche, so neither Boots nor Superdrug sell douches.
Perhaps post a screenshot?
Okay, i got my douche from ann summers
the lady behind the counter id checked me and said my passport photo was cute
all in all it was a fairly painless experience
thanks annskellington!
>>6490934
Dude, I went to the UK boots website, and saw what was available locally there. Dude. *HONK* *HONK* Dude? Can you hear me now?
>>6490939
Post screenshot you second rate troll
>mfw my Empire Handbook just arrived
Good, good. Now it's time to devour this.
Only probel mis those small notes made by those pesky Rebels.
>>6490943
No? I've never posted a screenshot in my life, and I'm not about to start now. Anyway, anyone can use google and go check themselves. If there was actually anyone that was ever going to read this shit thread, and gave a shit about your obsession with trains, they could go check themselves, and *POOF* your bullshit stories fall apart.
>>6490950
~~~shut up~~~
>>6490939
I'm on the UK boots website. When you type in "douche", you get four results, two for "creme douche" and "gel douche" (shower gel, basically, some of the products have French names), a feminine wash (it's a mousse, you rub it on the outside of the vagina and it's not a douche) and BV gel, a gel for bacterial vaginosis.
Could you screenshot the douches you're seeing? Presumably you're still getting American tracking cookies
Why is everyone having such problems buying a douche? FUCKING AMAZON!
Also, if you can get one at a walmart, just use self-checkout. That's what I do for buying KY for my fleshlight.
>>6490950
Not even that Anon just a different Brit Anon who can't find douches on the boots website because they aren't sold
Also no one is more autistic and obsessed with this than you lad
>>6490971
>Also, if you can get one at a walmart, just use self-checkout.
We don't have Walmart in the UK. ASDA is "part of the Walmart family"... and they don't sell douches. Because British women don't douche.
Thus if you want a douche you have to go to somewhere like Ann Summers which sells sex toys, because the only people who have douches in this country are people who are having anal sex
>>6490956
That's what I saw. Those are douches. Do you think because they say to apply to the outside of a vagina, that that's how they work? How exactly are they going to solve any problems INSIDE the vagina if you only apply them to the outside? They go inside.
I suppose you think poppers work by opening them and sitting them on your headboard to fill the room with a nice refreshing odor, too, huh? Cause that's what the directions say.
>British women don't use douches. We only use douchéés. They go on the otherside!
okay i finally got my douche
its a lot bigger than i thought it would be.
Anyway, I'm going to need it on Sunday, but do you think I should do a "test run" to make sure I know how to use it first?
>>6490991
I can tell you're not British, lol. No self respecting British woman would admit she owned one of those, not even anonymously.
>>6491002
im not a british woman, correct
im a british male
>>6490982
This object clearly cannot be inserted into a vagina, and even if it was being inserted into the vagina, it wouldn't function as a douche because it dispenses mousse. Canesfresh isn't for solving anything inside the vagina, it's for washing the labia. You're not supposed to wash inside the vagina, it's bad for it.
BV gel has an applicator that goes inside the vagina, where it applies gel. That isn't the same as a douche at all, it doesn't dispense liquid and you don't rinse the gel out.
The other two are literally shower gels. Douche is also the French word for shower.
You would not be able to use any of these items to prep for anal. Well, you could use the shower gels to wash yourself, but there's nothing there that could be used as a douche, because British pharmacies don't sell douches, as British women don't douche.
>>6491009
>what is a shower head?
Wow the guys on Grindr are pretty ugly and pretty sketch, I've met people from tinder but this app is kinda gross
>>6491019
yeah thats true
there are cute guys, theyre just rarer
>>6490982
>I suppose you think poppers work by opening them and sitting them on your headboard to fill the room with a nice refreshing odor, too, huh? Cause that's what the directions say.
Poppers have those directions to exploit a legal loophole. Why would a douche manufacturer disguise a douche as something else and provide deliberately incorrect instructions?
It seems more likely that none of those things are douches, and they just don't sell douches over there.
>>6491018
So you're saying that British women do indeed douche, because a pharmacy sells shower gel and you can improvise a douche with a shower head?
>>6491022
You do know that pre-1800s, dildos were marketed as dilators, right? Even though selling dildos was theoretically not illegal, or you could just sell dildo-shaped things and not give an explanation? But they lied about their purpose because of shame policing from religious people? So customers could shop without getting stalked?
Which seems more likely, that British women are just like all other women all over the world since the beginning of time, when even cavewomen would wash out the nasty using river water...or that British women just have magically 100% sanitary cooters from the time they're born until the day they die? Is it a thing where you can always smell British women coming from 30 feet away because of their cooter fog?
Douche means shower, so genital soap is called douche to be more sellable.
For vaginal douches, search for vaginal douches.
For anal douches, search for anal douches.
Both products can be bought in London and pretty much anywhere in the western world.
Thank you good bye.
>>6491048
Step 1: Apply soap
Step 2: Apply water
Step 3: ??? (it's douche)
Step 4: Profit
if u want a douche just look in ur personality lmao btfo
>>6491054
lol ur mom would not be happy with you being such a douche lmao get it because ur mom douches lol
First for anal is disgusting and you should feel bad for doing it.
>>6491054
mirror
>>6491060
ur mom mirrors a douche lol get it because she's just like you lmao
>>6491065
mirror
>>6491045
Douching isn't "sanitary", women don't need to douche their vaginas. The reason American women douche is because a lot of advertising money goes in to convincing them that they need to douche.
If you've got an infection you can either use a pessary (it's like a suppository but it goes in the vagina), a gel (applied with applicators that superficially resemble douches but could not be used as douches) or you just take a pill.
You can openly by condoms, lubricant and even vibrators in Boots, so they would have no need to lie about douches. Also, none of the things in that other screen grab could have been used as a douche.
what do u even need a douche for
>>6491068
douches are actually somewhat unhealthy
>>6491072
double mirror
xD
>>6491073
>*HONK*
Looks like I win
>>6491076
>what do u even need a douche for
Anal sex. Rinsing out your butthole so you don't cause a brown condom situation
>>6491078
*holds up a mirror so ur mirror reflects back in my mirror forever cos ur a douche*
>>6491080
ya u win 1 free ticket to the miniature train station lol
>>6491086
just buy an enema then lol
>>6491091
*uses a mirror that reflects in eternity and overshadows ur mirror until the sun doesn't shine*
>watch a tumblr cringe video
>crush HARD on the first confused guy i see
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JbCrKcJlhaE
seriously, that first guy is so cute, a fantastic half asian with the best characteristics of both. they are "gender fluid" which really means insecure and confused but not actually trans. I just wanna huddle him and elp him acept that he's just a gay man, and there is nothing wrong with that
look at the eyes and the freckles, and the cute australian accent...
I will never have a cute half breed bf ;_;
>>6491102
*kicks u in the shin*
heh nerd
>ask a guy to hang out
>he says "sure! how does tomorrow sound?"
>say times that work for me
>no response and its been 12 hours
>>6491104
I'm tellin
>>6491101
What you're thinking of as an enema is an anal douche. Enema kits are a lot more hassle and involve a lot more fluid than necessary and if you gave yourself an actual enema every time you wanted to have sex it'd take hours till you got the water clear.
Also it's not like you can just get an enema. The only enemas Boots sells require a prescription.
>>6491109
*shoves u over*
heh go tell, nobody will believe u
>>6491103
>so cute
his forehead is so big he looks like he is a sculpture made of butter and his face has started melting down his neck
and the face itself isn't great either
pretty mediocre tbqh senpai
>tfw no friends
>tfw never been to a bar or club
>tfw never got completely shitfaced and took a random guy home
>>6491118
u big meanie
POST SONGS THAT MAKE YOU CRY WITH JOY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q65KZIqay4E
>>6491128
*slams u up against the locker*
give us ur fuckin lunch money or ur gettin beat, faggot
>>6491122
There is an appeal to imperfections.
The eyes, the freckles, the voice, and something about the expressions just makes me want to cuddle this guy.
>>6491118
fuck me daddy
>>6491138
*fucks u*
>>6491135
what the fuck
>>6491117
lol what the fuck
wooooooo
>>6491144
Some wannabe child rapist mad that no little girls desire him, so he's trying to projected his unlove-ableness on somebody else.
You know, that epic final fantasy 4chan stuff.
>>6491170
Worst as in "har har I'm too dank for your words!" or worst as in "boo hoo I'm going to read the 4chan archive epic moot jokes to make my peepee hard again"?
Why does my asshole have this pinkish discoloration around it? Is that a turnoff for guys?
NSFW:
>http://imgur.com/WulO3t8
>>6491195
no, because you're fat and you're gay
>>6491195
Sure, are you around Michigan?
>>6491195
Use less hair product jfc
How do I fix my beard? Fucking facial pubes are the literal worst, and I think I'm going to get fucking laser for my neck so that I never have to deal with the fucking chore that is shaving.
>>6491216
Cool, wanna go watch the boats?
Thinking about getting my ears pierced and / or going for laser treatment on my facial acne scars. Any thoughts ?
Who else here /self improvement/ ?
>>6491229
>self improvement
>man getting his ears pierced
I guarantee it's going to make you look stupid. Some people can pull off earrings, but you won't.
>>6491247
You don't even know what I look like bro lol
>>6491195
What the fuck I've seen you before.
>>6491229
>ears pierced
>/self improvement/
lmao
>>6491282
One step at a time bro
>>6491273
he's a trip, AnnSkelington
>>6491294
get a PA or nip piercings instead desu they're cute
>>6491302
No, in real life. I lived in East Lansing for 8 years.
>>6491303
Senpai, you know a lot about butts, maybe you can help me.
Is it offputting if I have a little pinkish area of discoloration around my butthole? Is that weird?
>>6491303
>PA
?
>nip piercings
but no one can see them. Also sounds painful. Also how are they cute ?
>>6491303
What about a tongue piercing if you are a slutty femboi teenager?
>>6491325
get one of those and a navel piercing. that combo is hot as fuck
ignore senpai, he's canadian therefore stupid
>>6491334
I dunno, I've never talked to him. I just recognized his face.
>>6491331
um, its not a rash
Theres just a little section of pink skin around my butthole, which is itself pink as well.
NSFW: http://m.imgur.com/OAoXMiy
>>6491335
Hush or daddy's not gonna give you any attentioncummies
>>6491350
>(You)
>>6491345
Looks like HIV
>people are CANADIAN
>in 2016
truly the worst
>>6491363
whats so bad
