CCW/OC Stories
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You are currently reading a thread in /k/ - Weapons
You are currently reading a thread in /k/ - Weapons
bumping with a classic
Things that never happened thread?
>walk into mcdonalds
>instantly recognise a scene where a nigger is chimping out
>from what I can gather from the nigtalk its something about his chicken being shit or whatever
>girl on the register is visibly shaken, almost about to cry
>im on the queue at this point and after a minute or so im already tired of this shit so I tell him to calm down
>he turns around and is ready to chimp out at me too but then sees me OCing
>he sort of does a double take and now starts going on about BLM and white privilege
>ive had a long day already so i just take out my gun and just shoot him point blank
>there's a moment of pure silence through the restaurant
>then suddenly applause
>i walk up and give the register girl my order and can see that shes mirin
>i take my food and find a table and after a few minutes the girl from before comes to me
>apparently she got someone to take over for her for a few minutes so she could give me a blowjob while i enjoy my food
>after i finish the cops who were called on the scene tell me that im a hero and that im going to be awarded a medal on monday
Also got some free fires so that was nice.
1/3
>>30582790
genuine and heterosexual/10.
>>30582801
No, don't post this.
It makes me so very sad. And Jealous...
>>30582856
K.
>>30582856
why sad? I heard they settled and /mu/ anon got to keep all the good stuff
>>30582801
That story makes me motivated to someday collect a bunch of expensive and rare guns so I could pass them to my son and he could laugh at the poorfags on future /k/.
>>30582968
Pirate Cracka Johnny is still my all time favorite. Even over the steroid shooting softball player.
>>30582790
>>no gay cop range buddies conclusion
>> 4/10
>>30582448
Potentially fun one; appears to be a routine OC aspie traipsing though CT for purposes of LE trolling. Haven't had a chance to watch the videos yet, but from the articles it looks like the LEOs rose to the bait in fine form. http://www.theblaze.com/stories/2016/01/13/open-carry-gun-owner-videotapes-police-requesting-his-permit-inside-connecticut-store-just-wait-until-you-get-a-load-of-his-answer/
>>30582448
>Things that didn't happen thread
>on a blind date with this chick a friend set me up with
>had tickets to see a local band and then we went to dinner after
>it's going really well, she's funny and we're getting along great
>walk her back to her place
>she invites me in
>oh boy it's happening
>it gets to where clothes are about to start coming off
>then I remember I'm carrying
>we didn't talk politics or gun stuff at all and I don't want her to freak out when she finds out that I'm not just happy to see her
>panic for a moment as I consider tactical pants removal options
>she backs off a bit and starts removing her shirt giving me a idea
>I'll half-turn and just hide my gun behind my leg as I remove pants, then drop my shirt over everything
>glance over to see if she's watching as I'm dropping my pants
>"HOLY SHIT IS THAT A GUN?"
>I didn't actually shout when I said that
>she's got this shocked deer in headlights look as she's kind of trying to hide her holster
>then she sees me standing there in my boxers with a raging boner and my own carry piece
>we end up sitting on her couch talking about guns for five minutes in our underwear before continuing with what we were doing
Does anyone have like that story/copy pasta about a dude who was in the military doing some super secret shit and he was called into to like a facility with his buddies that kinda implied it was for chemical weapons research, and something had gone wrong? Then a bunch of dudes died throughout the thing and he was pretty much one of the only ones who got out alive. It was a realllyyyy long one and kinda creepy too.
>>30585223
that's some kind of disney shit right there
>>30585333
>Disney
Nah, it'd be Dreamworks, Didney proper doesn't do guns.
>>30585331
Interested.
>>30582448
>>30582448
>>30582448
>>30582448
.
>>30585331
>>30585463
Found it.
>>30585331
bump
>>30585531
had a hearty kek
>>30585902
That was interesting, i wonder what does the J357 mean
>>30585902
What the hell did I just read.
>>30585902
I don't know if I want that to be real or fake.
>>30585902
Spooky. I like it.
>>30586225
Probably a code for some biological weapon or project involving biological warfare.
Let me just run that through wikileaks real quick, see if anything comes up.
>>30582448
>>30582801
Please post the rest :c I don't have it saved
>>30582448
Things that never happened thread?
Cool. I've got one that's a pretty good read
>>30587571
downloading the same image 3 times what's it like being that stupid?
>>30587647
You mean an image with the same filename?
>Wake up
>Have to shit
>Not in the woods
>Fuck
>Sit on potty
>Pooper's backed up
>What the poopy
>Get ready for the day
>Cramps in lower abdomen something hadoken
>Head to the local Sheetz cause custom-made pretzel-roll sandwich is fucking god tier
>Huge guy lumbering about the place
>Has a black rifle on his back
>It's got a funny magazine stickin' out of it
>Like a duck penis rolled up
>Middle-aged woman toddles in
>She sees the gun and starts going ballistic
>Cramps are getting worse
>Huge guy just laughs the woman off
>Woman's looking around in a tizzy
>Toddles over and grabs my bicep
>Cramps are severe, clutching gut
>Woman is screeching about how I have to stop the guy from murdering the universe or some shit
>Speaking of shit
>Try to shake her off
>She snarls and refuses to budge
>Jam a thumb in her eye
>She falls over
>Cramps are driving me crazy
>Stamp on her foot
>Face is mere inches from hers
>Bellow
>"YOU ARE EDUCATED STUPID"
>Spin around, drop pantaloons
>Squat and squeeze
>Finally, the ghosts of Ho Chi Minh's soldiers are loosed like Larry Gooseman
>A rock solid turd slaps against the woman's face, followed by another
>And another
>And another
>Finally a cop flies out of my asshole and punches right through the woman's pelvis
>She stares at me in horror as she dies
>I am become Dick Kickem
>Chewer of ass
