How would /k/ defeat the world's most fearsome fighting team in close combat? Keep in mind, they're heroes in a half-shell, and they're green.
elevators
Turn them on their backs.
Why am I fighting heroes again?
>>30446492
Because you're a nazi, famalam
>>30446054
pizza
>>30446054
Mossberg 500
>>30446506
but even novantanove formaggio has only a 25% success rate
>>30446054
APRIL'S WET CUNT
With some sweet hand spikes.
>>30446532
>99%*
fix'd fer ye mate
Give them addictive pizza repeatedly, while pretending to be their friend.
Once they're too fat to fight, victory will be mine.
>>30446579
damn ferengi
>>30446547
10/10 would be defeated by
>>30446614
Always rely on a simple tailor to find the simple solution to a problem.
Just make the turtles morbidly obese by indulging their pizza habit.
>>30446054
Honestly screw close combat, im gonna .308 Leo from 3 blocks away. Just Leo. They'll never know it's me, and their structure will completely fall apart for it
>>30446054
SUFFER NOT THE MUTANT
>>30446714
this
maybe kneecap raph to break his spirit
>>30446552
Nigga died almost immediately in the original print. Ninja turtles didn't fuck around.
Plan A involves jumping on their backs