You are at home one night on the computer fapping to hentai when you hear some noises outside.
It's Dog the bounty hunter and his team (you don't know this however) who have mistaken your house for their target's house.
Then you hear slamming on your door. Unbeknownst to you they are ramming it down.
"OPEN UP YOU FUCKER!" you hear them yell.
what do you do?
Grab my gun tell them I'm armed and demand to know why they're trying to break and enter
>>30188009
Call the ATF.
Would it be legal in the state of Texas to shoot them in the face of they got my door down?
Tell them i'm not a meth head with no history of armed violence. They turn around and leave.
Dog only goes after the easy and safe bounties. People that could be caught by 5 kommandoes.
>>30188009
>Unbeknownst to you they are ramming it down.
bail bondsmen aren't allowed to do that. I'm legally justified in shooting him if he does bust it down and sue his estate for a new door.
>>30188026
I like you.
>>30188009
Grab my AK and wait at the end of the funnel.
>>30188009
>let the brute entry force carry them in
>lock them in my bedroom
>call cops, inform them that a felon is in possession of my firearms
Arent they highly selective about their bounties as to not go up against armed once
He is a joke and a bloody coward in his profession
>>30188044
Probably better of to tell them that you're not a method head WITH a history of violence, they'll pussy out then.
>>30188043
Yes
You know, with all the talk of /k/ needing to form a PMC group (mostly jokingly, of course.) Why go through the trouble when becoming a Bounty Hunter is relatively easy, and almost any /k/ommando could do it...and make decent money if they got off their ass every day?
Just seems like /k/ actually COULD start a Bounty Hunting "company.", and have the opportunity to act out some of it's Cheeki Breeki fantasies.
I'd be all over that shit. I actually could get my BH license pretty quick where I live. Maybe I will for shits and gigs. But I have no idea how starting a /k/ompany would work. I just know that it is not nearly as difficult as starting a PMC group, or even a private investigation firm because of less legal crap to wade through.
>>30188070
this guy got it right, they have to knock and they can't do shit if you don't open the door
>>30188043
Technically he wouldn't even have to get through your door. Him just being on your porch banging on your door trying to arrest you would be enough justification. Because A. you have no idea who he is. and B. he's on your property making, what you perceive as, threats.
This is "technically" though.
>>30188137
The PMC think wasn't a joke some fag got raided after the bought a cost guard cutter and tried to get the paper work to operate
willis mckillis even did some draw fag shit to commemorate the event
>>30188158
>wake up one day
>reading news headlines
>Dog The Bounty Hunter shot through a front door, shooter not punished
The keks would be immense.
>>30188193
what ever happened to Willis?
>>30188070
not in my state :( in california i'm supposed to bend over and let them penetrate my anus before i'm allowed to use force
>>30188101
Hoo wee, I like it
>>30188193
Oh. Well that's sad. Really, really sad. But why not shoot for something smaller like Bounty Hunting, which really could one day take off and lead to Operatin'. Because people like Dog really do only do the "safe" stuff.
>>30188194
Well, welcome to Texas.
I'd have to go look at the exact law, but yeah. If someone is on your property and won't leave, and you can justify your actions in court (which amounts to "I was scared.") You can remove Poi.
>>30188193
What happened to coast guard guy? Is he being molested in canadian prison? If so I need to get onto that
>>30188009
Dog is a felon and is not allowed to own firearms, his CS paintball gun is no match for a shotgun.
I let them try and break in the door and violently subdue me
Then sue them to get more funs
>>30188243
no they turned him loose if he promised never to operate
>>30188253
you wont win they will claim the reasonably believed the person they were looking for was there because xyz bull shit, and you were hiding him, and he must have just not been there at the time.
>>30188310
>>30188009
I'd start screaming allahu ackbar and lobbing 7.62 through the door.
>>30188009
They don't use real guns, so I'd just kill them.
I've got a handgun on my body at all times and a long-gun a few steps away at any time.
They haven't announced themselves as any sort of legal force, which they aren't, and so I'd watch them scatter.
>>30188137
There as an anon that worked for a bondsman company his uncle owned and apparently it's a really shitty dangerous job that pays little.
>>30188193
Fucking Canucks and thier cuckholdry
>>30188596
I've heard mixed stuff about being a Bondsman/Bounty Hunter. More or less that it really just depends on who you work for and how it is set up. Like, you may get paid hourly and not off of actual "bounties" or on a sort of Commission scale. But then in other companies you make a bit more because you get paid differently.
Dunno though. That is just what I heard. It seems like it would be a fun job, if you did it with friends and got to choose who you went after. I.e....making your own business.
>>30188009
>Hear banging steps coming up the apartment stairs
>Live on the top floor so know it's for me
>Grab pistol long before they come
>Hear banging on the door
>Chamber round, safety off
>Remain silent
>Shoot fucker dead as he breaks in
>Get kitchen knife and cut off pony tail as trophy
>Call authorities
>Call Dog's network and pitch idea for new show
>Also gain his soul and powers
>Scream off balcony
>Go back to shitposting on /k/
>>30188009
Or what you're going to shoot me with your paintball gun and pepper spray? Did you bring your rape whistle too?
>Grab salt rifle and 100 rd clipizine
>>30188009
>Be me
>Chillin out at 10 at night
>Hear some spoopy rustling outside
>Take no note of it until I hear footsteps on my porch
>I'm already geared up, so now worries
>Like I said- chillin
>Dude starts pounding on my door
>"I've smoked 14 packs of cigarettes a day for the past 45 years" voice pipes up
>"THIS IS DOG THE BOUNTY HUNNER"
>He lights up a cig right there, mid sentence
>"COME OUT WITH YER HANDS UP, YOR UNNDER ARREST"
>Tell him to go fuck off, I haven't done anything wrong
>Emphysema man starts ramming on my fucking door
>Run to my room and get my trusty, SCAR-17
>Start that SRV song from Blackhawk Down
>CALL ME THE ATF, BECAUSE I'M ABOUT TO BLAST THIS DOG
>DUNDUNDUNDUNDUNDUNDUN
>Dump my mag into the door
>Glorious 7.62 cuts through with ease
>Exfil to my back yard, theres more nig nogs about
>Load my name brand Winchester PDX 1™ hollowpoint ammo clip
>See pussy boy number 2 round the corner to get me
>Ur fugged kiddo.jpg
>Rek his shit
>Hear popping shit hit my plate carrier
>Wtf is going on? Its like I'm patted on the back
>Remember that these guys use fucking PAINTBALL GUNS
>Turn around and laugh as I put 3 basketball sized exit wounds into Emphysema Man Jr.
>Scan the perimeter, see Dog's now widow, the Hog
>Tell her to squeeze her fat ass back in her truck before I cut some meat off her and make bacon
>Put on Dog's theme song while I scalp him for a trophy
>I'M THE DOG
>THE BIG BAD DOG
>THE BOUNTY HUNTER
>>30188132
That would mean you aren't a meth head AND have no history of violence. The original form was correct. Retard.
>let them break down the wooden door
>shut the steel cage behind them
>set my house on fire
I am not stuck in here with you, but YOU are stuck in here with ME!
>play gladiator battle music
>release tigers
>drop from ceiling wearing nothing but 2 ebay tomahawks and a tiki mask
>>30188926
>100 keks
>>30188926
SHIT POST MASTER LEVEL ACHIEVED
>>30188009
Shoot them through the door, call the sheriff, have him try and arrest me for shooting several armed people on my porch in thr middle of nowhere.
get killed from ricochet off Dog's big ass belt buckle when i open up on his team.
>>30188584
Pop quiz. When you get out of the shower what do you grab first? A towel or a glock?
>>30188926
>CALL ME THE ATF, BECAUSE I'M ABOUT TO BLAST THIS DOG
>>30188015
Yup just pull a gun dog is a felon so he not allowed to have any gun
>>30189080
Kek
>>30188926
SOMEONE PLEASE SCREENCAP
>H
>O
>L
>Y
>K
>E
>K
>>30188026
Kek
>>30188952
>and have no history of violence
>with history of violence
I think is two different things, friend.
>>30188009
Tell him to leave, call 911, and shoot his ass to death if he comes past the front door.
>>30188009
>Mfw this douche would get himself arrested in Connecticut for being a felon in possession of a firearm facsimile.
As a bonus,the cops would most likely let the criminal he was trying to capture go,because the cops in the cities here are like the three stooges.
>>30189253
>>30189586
Thank you based anon
>>30188120
He is mistaking your house for his targets
>>30189674
>doesn't know how to take a screenshot
>>30188009
I ready my rifle with my 40rounder and wait.
>>30189689
For some reason my shit doesn't work. I use command+shift+4 and nothing happens
>>30189732
Use Greenshot
http://getgreenshot.org/
>be carlson
>try to stab dog
>blade gets caught in belt buckle
>he rapes my innocent ass
>>30188193
a coast guard cutter? How much fucking money did this guy have to blow? They must sell those things for a fuck ton.
>>30188926
Bravo...
Too bad you didn't add that you'd be 'The Bounty Hunter Hunter'
>>30188009
>paintball guns
>what do you do
Pity them briefly before I proceed to shrek their asses with 5.56
Come in uninvited and armed, you are leaving in your back. I'm not a criminal and not expecting the cops.
>>30188926
>>30188009
>what do you do?
Considering that I'm not under indictment, nor any debt obligations, not any warrants, and I like in a state that allows me to resist unlawful arrest with lethal force, I respond with lethal force.
>>30190286
Your state let's you kill cops that unlawfully arrest you? Damn, what state is that? I may move there.
>>30188222
Cali has surprisingly good self defense laws. L.A. and Bay Area cops and politicians do not like this and will look for any reason to punish you for defending yourself, though.
>>30188009
I initially wanted to say that profession is a good way to get shot but then I remembered it's a TV show
Mag dump my FAL thru the door.
Pick up my m1 and finish Gods work.
Anyone with anthing to do with reality TV deserves an eternity in Hell.
>>30188137
because being a bail bondsman actually requires some level of business sense and decision making skills.
>>30188135
>>30188158
>Be doggy
>Knock on suspects door
>"OPEN UP"
>Hear "CYKA BLYAT"
>*BOOM*
>Glorious 7.62x54r round evaporates a perfect hole through wooden door and sails right through dogs head
>Dogs head is now gone, face lands on titty monster boob
>Screeches
>Slimjim skeleton man can't believe what his commiefornian eyes just saw
>tries killing himself with his paintball gun
>fails but ends up blinding entire crew for life with pepper spray
>last thing they saw was dogs head turn to red mist
>Pizza-D for life
Would make for an amazing episode
>>30188043
Oh yes, it'll be okay. I shot an illegal nowhere near my ranch house and the authorities laughed when I asked if I was in trouble.
>>30190957
This. It's as fake as a porn star's tits.
>>30191571
>>>30188043
Good job trying to be like>>30188926
>>30188101
>>30188026
Had my milk squirt through my nose 11/10 not even mad.
>>30188009
12 Gauge slug gun, nothing says "down boy" like a slug to the chest.
>>30191758
Didn't even read the thread, I'm the winner here
>>30188009
Kill the cunts.
While yelling "Redcoats leave! REEEEEEEE!"
bailbond agencies decide in whom to invest their money so they can fucking pick whom they have to chase. Is a business, not a operationally operator operation. You invest money in the taining of your employees, so you most likely dont want them to get shot by fucking tyrones
>>30188043
dead to rights
>>30188026
>>30190858
http://www.constitution.org/uslaw/defunlaw.htm
>didn't know it was dawg the bounty hunter
Call the cops and get ready to light his ass up
>knew it was dawg
Yell back "hey I saw you in Waipahu at food land, you look way smaller in real life, also your wife is a fat whore"
>>30188009
>what do you do?
shoot low becuase that faggot "dog" is like 3' tall
>>30188009
hmm let me think about it, turn my back and grab my gat and guess what I say before I shoot him? If you dont quit (yeah) if you dont stop (what) im letting my gat pop cause its 187 on an undercover cop
>>30191626
what caliber? what gun?
>>30195363
halawa heights here fampai
what up
Bounty Hunters are shit gargling, troglodytes, that make their living off the misery of people who are already in difficult situations.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FDPDdy-udvE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ibwWRXk8sdw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7xjuJC-bnzY
>>30196089
>Breaking my door
>Scaring the shit out of my kid
You'd be able to use their bodies as rad suits with the amount of lead I'd put in them.
>>30188026
kek
>>30196089
God damn I would have been waiting with a shotgun pointed at the door and blew their brains out the second they broke my door.
>>30188009
Pretty much this at 4:48 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NQ5bd29F030
>>30188026
God damn man.
>>30188926
>clip
>>30188009
>He breaks down my door.
>Lure him into one of my many rooms.
>It is lined with alcohol, every wall has any liquor you could want.
>Escape while his Native American mind is dazed and lock him in.
>He is later found dead in a pile of vomit and covered in a blanket.
>>30188026
kek
>>30196089
>Strong empowered Womyn
To be fair...
>>30189744
or you could be a normal human bean and use prt scr
![keep-calm-and-release-the-hounds-10[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/ZHaPJ1r.png "keep-calm-and-release-the-hounds-10[1].png")
>>30188219
Someone got salty and doxxed him, so he packed his shit and left.
>>30189782
>Fuck ton.
Nah, given the economy these days it;s more like three shit loads.
Open the door and tell them they're at the wrong place, ask who they're looking for. Have you ever seen the show? They have briefings where they look at the targets mugshot
>>30197360
>Have you ever seen the show?
Yes, he is a retarded native version of John Walsh who lost his kid because his landwhale wife could not pass it through the grand canyon of fat without smothering it.
>>30197346
>
Good
I didn't like how he portrayed Chinese military anyway.
>>30197366
>I didn't like how he portrayed Chinese military anyway.
You mean it existing?
>>30197366
>didn't like how someone portrayed the Chinese
If I squinted any harder at your post, I'd probably BE chinese...
>>30197366
I don't even recall any of his comics that portrayed the Chinese .mil much at all.
Where's the beef, Clara Peller?
>>30191626
I don't understand this Texan mindset. They're essentially Californians pretending to be Wyomingites or Montanans.
>>30189002
kek
>>30197366
>chinese miritary so skrong
All their knockoff gear sure is great.
Can anyone explain why this insufferable faggot is wearing a british flag on his costume? (Not really a uniform)
>>30197366
>goes to forum filled with gwailo
>artist pokes fun at PRC military
>gets offended
Contrary to political indoc classes, people have different opinions.
>>30188009
1) Announce my presence and that i am armed, demand them to leave
2) Shoot them with my gun that I legally own, since I'm not a convicted felon.
>>30188009
"Are you cops with a warrant? If not prepare to hear sirens and gunshots, not necessarily in that order."
>I dont have any guns
>But I do have alot of ammo
>Pull a home alone with bullets insteat of marbles
>Doge slips comming up the stairs
>Commencing a "I fell and slipped on his paintball barrell"
>Hospital staff try their hardest not to snicker
>Grab one of several loaded guns around my house because I live in the middle of nowhere and have no kids
>Yell "Are you the police?"
>Fire with extreme prejudice when armed strangers enter my home
>>30189101
But don't you see the lethal dangerous assault weapon with 50 bullet clip in OP's pic?
>>30197346
Naw mang he ded in a car crash
>>30196734
>whats a joke?
